Beings, Belongings and Places: A Qualitative Study on International Students‘ Networks [1st ed.] 9783658313630, 9783658313647

Table of contents :
Front Matter ....Pages I-VII
From internationalisation to mobilities (Alice Altissimo)....Pages 1-2
Internationalisation myths and transnational realities (Alice Altissimo)....Pages 3-12
Research design and research question (Alice Altissimo)....Pages 13-23
Sampling, data collection & analysis (Alice Altissimo)....Pages 25-34
A lonesome warrior and a helpful community: the cases (Alice Altissimo)....Pages 35-161
Main dimensions: beings, belongings and places (Alice Altissimo)....Pages 163-224
Relationships spanning beings, belongings and places (Alice Altissimo)....Pages 225-239
Support in international students’ relationships (Alice Altissimo)....Pages 241-251
Finally … from international students to transnational study (Alice Altissimo)....Pages 253-256
Back Matter ....Pages 257-271

Citation preview

Wissenschaft – Hochschule – Bildung

Alice Altissimo

Beings, Belongings and Places A Qualitative Study on International Students‘ Networks

Wissenschaft – Hochschule – Bildung Reihe herausgegeben von Meike Sophia Baader, Hildesheim, Deutschland Marion Kamphans, Hildesheim, Deutschland Svea Korff, Hildesheim, Deutschland Wolfgang Schröer, Hildesheim, Deutschland

National wie international sind Hochschulen und Wissenschaftssysteme in Bewegung geraten. Grund genug mit einer Buchreihe den Zusammenhang von Hochschulen als Wissenschafts- und Bildungsorganisationen mit Diskursen und Politiken sowie mit dem Erleben von Subjekten und ihren Interaktionen aus inter- und transdisziplinärer Perspektive kritisch in den Blick zu nehmen. Die Buchreihe „Wissenschaft – Hochschule – Bildung“ der HerausgeberInnen Meike Sophia Baader, Marion Kamphans, Svea Korff und Wolfgang Schröer vom For­ schungscluster „Hochschule und Bildung“ der Stiftung Universität Hildesheim greift aktuelle Themen der empirischen Hochschul- und Bildungsforschung auf. In der Reihe erscheinen Monografien und Sammelbände mit Beiträgen, die auf unterschiedlichen theoretischen, empirischen und transdisziplinären Ansätzen basieren. Manuskriptangebote werden von den HerausgeberInnen der Reihe begutachtet und bei Annahme redaktionell betreut.

Weitere Bände in der Reihe http://www.springer.com/series/15771

Alice Altissimo

Beings, Belongings and Places A Qualitative Study on International Students‘ Networks

Alice Altissimo Universität Hildesheim Hildesheim, Deutschland Dissertation zur Erlangung des Doktorgrades der Philosophie im Fachbereich 1, Erziehungs- und Sozialwissenschaften an der Universität Hildesheim. Vorgelegt von Alice Altissimo Hildesheim, den 27.09.2018

Wissenschaft – Hochschule – Bildung ISBN 978-3-658-31363-0 ISBN 978-3-658-31364-7  (eBook) https://doi.org/10.1007/978-3-658-31364-7 © The Editor(s) (if applicable) and The Author(s), under exclusive license to Springer Fachmedien Wiesbaden GmbH, part of Springer Nature 2020 This work is subject to copyright. All rights are solely and exclusively licensed by the Publisher, whether the whole or part of the material is concerned, specifically the rights of translation, reprinting, reuse of illustrations, recitation, broadcasting, reproduction on microfilms or in any other physical way, and transmission or information storage and retrieval, electronic adaptation, computer software, or by similar or dissimilar methodology now known or hereafter developed. The use of general descriptive names, registered names, trademarks, service marks, etc. in this publication does not imply, even in the absence of a specific statement, that such names are exempt from the relevant protective laws and regulations and therefore free for general use. The publisher, the authors and the editors are safe to assume that the advice and information in this book are believed to be true and accurate at the date of publication. Neither the publisher nor the authors or the editors give a warranty, expressed or implied, with respect to the material contained herein or for any errors or omissions that may have been made. The publisher remains neutral with regard to jurisdictional claims in published maps and institutional affiliations. This Springer VS imprint is published by the registered company Springer Fachmedien Wiesbaden GmbH part of Springer Nature. The registered company address is: Abraham-Lincoln-Str. 46, 65189 Wiesbaden, Germany

Table of Contents 1

From internationalisation to mobilities ............................... 1

2

Internationalisation myths and transnational realities ........ 3 2.1 From international students… ............................................................. 6 2.2 … to transnational social networks ...................................................... 9

3

Research design and research question ............................. 13 3.1 Preparing the interviews ................................................................... 14 3.1.1 Network map and interview guide .................................................... 15 3.1.2 Interview structure ............................................................................ 17 3.2 Research questions ........................................................................... 21

4

Sampling, data collection & analysis ................................. 25 4.1 Sampling ........................................................................................... 25 4.2 Data analysis: methods & procedure ................................................. 27 4.2.1 Analysis of the maps .......................................................................... 27 4.2.2 Analysis of the interviews .................................................................. 29 4.2.3 Subjectivity and positioning ............................................................... 32

5

A lonesome warrior and a helpful community: the cases .. 35 5.1 A lonesome warrior: Luis Alberto, a highly communicative loner ....... 35 5.1.1 Analysis of the map ............................................................................ 36 5.1.2 Analysis of the narrative .................................................................... 44 5.1.3 Combination of the map and the narrative ....................................... 81

VI

Table of Contents

5.2 “Always supported by someone”: Seung-min’s communities ............. 87 5.2.1 Knowing Germans to settle in............................................................ 88 5.2.2 In community we trust: supportive “brothers and sisters” ............... 91 5.2.3 Relationships beyond the community ............................................. 105 5.2.4 Jointly creating a caring community ................................................ 114 5.2.5 Evolving relationships & moving knowledge ................................... 120 5.3 “Living a fragmented life”: Nevena’s struggle to settle down ........... 134 5.3.1 Having an international, fragmented life ......................................... 136 5.3.2 (Not) shared, meta and transnational knowledge ........................... 139 5.3.3 Being isolated, being special ............................................................ 143 5.3.4 Incompatibility with the system ...................................................... 149 5.3.5 “People come and go sometimes”: friendships in international bubbles ............................................................................................ 154

6

Main dimensions: beings, belongings and places ............ 163 6.1 “I’m a psychologist, in fact”: being an international student ............ 163 6.1.1 The (a)typical international student ................................................ 164 6.1.2 Understanding, celebrating, surviving… International students’ practices ........................................................................................... 166 6.1.3 “International student” as a status .................................................. 170 6.1.4 Being lonely...................................................................................... 176 6.1.5 Being a (best) friend......................................................................... 185 6.1.6 Being a believer................................................................................ 188 6.1.7 Families are so important because we’re far away: being a family member ........................................................................................... 190 6.2 “It was my group of people”: belongings ......................................... 195 6.2.1 We share the culture and the immigrant experience ...................... 196 6.2.2 Belonging to a nation / nationality .................................................. 198 6.2.3 Higher education communities........................................................ 199 6.2.4 Playing football and meeting people ............................................... 204 6.2.5 “The dance group has a huge social function” ................................ 206 6.2.6 The ever-supportive religious community ....................................... 208 6.2.7 Hanging out with a group of friends ................................................ 209 6.2.8 Consequences of belonging to a group ........................................... 212

Table of Contents

VII

6.3 Place(s) ........................................................................................... 212 6.3.1 Here ................................................................................................. 213 6.3.2 There ................................................................................................ 214 6.3.3 Neither here nor there: living in a bubble ....................................... 215 6.3.4 Cities ................................................................................................ 217 6.3.5 Places – connecting people.............................................................. 222

7

Relationships spanning beings, belongings and places .... 225 7.1 Flexible beings ................................................................................ 226 7.2 Belonging through foci .................................................................... 230 7.3 Spanning places .............................................................................. 235

8

Support in international students’ relationships ............. 241 8.1 “She's eternal”: flexible support “to go” .......................................... 241 8.2 “On the other side of the world”: far and fixed support ................... 244 8.3 “If I ever move to China”: fixed but flexible support......................... 246 8.4 Being there: co-presence and changing support ............................... 248

9

Finally … from international students to transnational study ............................................................................... 253

Bibliography ........................................................................... 257 Annex: Questions for interviews with network maps ............. 269

1

From internationalisation to mobilities

Internationalisation is a goal in most higher education institutions (HEIs), which adopt various strategies to achieve it, one of which is to attract increasingly large numbers of international students. Practices are oriented mainly towards increasing the number of student and staff exchanges and then integrating the students into “business as usual” at the host university. However, this approach underestimates and ignores the students’ actual innate potential. Therefore, instead of focussing on the typical figure of the deficient or exotic international student, this study concentrates on international degree-seeking students’ important relationships and how they are relevant in the students’ everyday lives. These are the main questions in the qualitative interviews with international students. I conducted the narrative interviews using egocentric network maps. This methodology aims at keeping the focus on the students’ relationships throughout the interviews and analyses. The students’ accounts revolve around such entities as important people, places, organisations, objects, ideas, plans and traditions, among other things, as shown in the more detailed analysis of three of the interviews. By looking into their relationships with these entities, I then map out how students describe their main beings (i.e. their understandings of themselves, e.g. as students, family members, friends), belongings (i.e. how they perceive themselves as a part of an organisation, a context or a group), places they do or do not feel connected to and different kinds of support they experience. Important relationships in the networks include those with their family, friends and acquaintances, with their everyday activities such as studying and working, with their free time activities, with places where they spend time, with important dates and with ideas or © The Editor(s) (if applicable) and The Author(s), under exclusive license to Springer Fachmedien Wiesbaden GmbH, part of Springer Nature 2020 A. Altissimo, Beings, Belongings and Places, Wissenschaft – Hochschule – Bildung, https://doi.org/10.1007/978-3-658-31364-7_1

2

From internationalisation to mobilities

beliefs which are relevant to them. These entities have proven to be important for the students wherever they are geographically. Their beings and belongings are intersected by connections to various places, a phenomenon which is not yet included in the institutional perspective on internationalisation. The research project’s main finding is how students constantly act in and form transnational networks. This leads to the proposition that the support necessary to international students need not always be provided through specific, targeted or one-on-one training and coaching. Instead, by taking the students’ highly transnational lifeworlds into account and seeking ways to link their networks to institutional contexts, HEIs can build their strategies for internationalisation on a more promising and inclusive basis, simultaneously creating supportive environments for all students. Further, by contextualising international students as transnationally connected, this study shows how the host institutions are actually far more transnational than they (the HEIs themselves) may acknowledge. To sum up, the aims of this study are to: • offer a relational perspective on international students’ everyday lives, • relate international students’ beings and belongings to the contexts they act in, • explore the interconnection between international students’ networks and the support they experience in their everyday lives, • understand international students’ role in the contexts they live in, including how they (co-)create and define transnational spaces, • grasp how internationality and transnationalism arises and is produced in international students’ relationships.

2

Internationalisation myths and transnational realities

What does the internationalisation 1 of Higher Education Institutions (HEIs) mean and imply? In this chapter I first discuss perspectives on the internationalisation of HEIs, focussing on how the topics of internationalisation and international students are linked to each other in current discourses. I then introduce the concept of transnationalism as a theoretical basis and discuss how it provides an encompassing starting point to view the link between HEIs’ internationalisation and international students. Internationality is considered a major aim for higher education institutions. These strive to constantly raise the numbers of international students and cooperative international arrangements, and to increase their international reputation. For the past few decades, institutions have been concentrating on increasing the numbers of international students and teaching staff, and of cross-border projects, cooperative efforts and partnerships, to gain prestige and money. Knight and de Wit (2018) provide a differentiated overview of the evolution of international education terminology during the past 50 years, which shows that the concept of internationalisation has become increasingly broad and varied. These HEIs’ internationalisation strategies of increasing numbers of international students and staff, and of cooperative international arrangements, suggest that an institution can be internationalised by taking specific, quantifiable measures. The strategies are proven 1

“Internationalization at the national, sector, and institutional levels is defined as the process of integrating an international, intercultural, or global dimension into the purpose, functions or delivery of postsecondary education.” (Knight, 2015, p. 2)

© The Editor(s) (if applicable) and The Author(s), under exclusive license to Springer Fachmedien Wiesbaden GmbH, part of Springer Nature 2020 A. Altissimo, Beings, Belongings and Places, Wissenschaft – Hochschule – Bildung, https://doi.org/10.1007/978-3-658-31364-7_2

4

Internationalisation myths and transnational realities

successful when the HEI has attained its goals: specific targets, benchmarks or reference points. Following this trend, the study by Brandenburg and Federkeil (2007) suggests that internationalisation can be measured and expressed in precise figures. Their working paper chooses a set of input and output indicators, e.g. numbers of members of the HEIs (staff and students) who have been mobile internationally, number of international visitors to the HEIs; cooperation in international study programmes, publications, conferences, projects and networks; numbers of courses in foreign languages and international reputation. Such studies place quantity before quality in internationalisation and neglect the purpose, the content and the consequences of what they quantify. The financial aspect of efforts towards internationalisation should not be neglected, either, since international students’ tuition fees and the prestige gained by ranking high in internationality indexes can greatly increase HEIs’ income, which makes promoting this kind of internationalisation a lucrative endeavour. Altbach and Knight (2007) map out the internationalisation landscape in various parts of the world, and discuss developments and necessities, including up-to-date methods such as e-learning and a supportive framework such as European policies. They push for an internationalisation which benefits the public and is not only a profit centre. Teichler (2007) also welcomes internationalisation tendencies, but calls for the consequences of the internationalisation of higher education institutions to be reviewed and measured. Similarly, Deardorff (2006) critically asks how institutions of higher education measure the effectiveness of their internationalisation efforts. In light of these developments, Brandenburg and de Wit (2011) demand a reality check: “While in need of more philosophy we also require a greater sense of reality. We cannot continue to assume that certain

Internationalisation myths and transnational realities

5

types of mobility and other international activities (such as exchanges and study abroad) are good in themselves and that other types (such as recruitment and transnational education) are bad. We have to dig deeper, place the options within a new set of values and rationales, and ensure that we really achieve what is meaningful.” (p. 16) In response, in 2012, the International Association of Universities (IAU) published their Call for Action: Affirming Academic Values in Internationalization of Higher Education. While approving of internationalisation, the IAU warns that it can entail unforeseen negative consequences such as creating cultural homogenisation, diminishing the diversity of institutional models in the name of a standardised model of excellence, brain drain, stereotyping or the exclusion of international students. Following the same line of reasoning, in “Five Myths About Internationalization”, Knight (2011) debunks five common myths about internationalisation. At the very top of her list of myths is the conviction that the presence per se of international students on campus will internationalise higher education institutions. While this may be true from a purely quantitative perspective, Knight warns that international students often feel marginalised and socially isolated, without having a chance to participate in classes, interact with fellow students or make friends at their common place of residence. To avoid such negative consequences and to promote beneficial, advantageous internationalisation despite “rapid change, complex realities, and evermounting pressures of competition and limited resources” (Knight, p. 5) the IAU (2012) calls upon HEIs to embrace and apply a set of values which revolve around central issues such as diversity, equity, respect, fairness, social and communal responsibility and engagement – and to constantly assess the developments in HEIs against these parameters. In the following, I first trace the discussion about

6

Internationalisation myths and transnational realities

the perspective on international students in the internationalisation of HEIs and then describe an approach that enables me to make sense of the above-mentioned complex realities surrounding HEIs’ internationalisation and international students’ role therein. 2.1

From international students…

Internationalisation efforts, mobility schemes and programmes are leading to an increasingly lively dialogue between HEIs all over the world (cf. Isserstedt & Kandulla, 2010; DAAD & HIS, 2010). Accordingly, the importance of international students is also increasing in an academic, national and global context (Shupe, 2007). Nevertheless, as discussed above, internationalisation and, especially, flows of international students from one country to another are mostly viewed from an economic perspective (Kim, 2009). Student mobility 2 can be located at the crossroads of discourses on highly skilled migration (see Eskelä, 2013), as a consequence of globalisation, in the context of migratory elites (see Bilecen, 2009) and of youth mobility. Student mobility usually takes place during a stage in life characterised by openness and flexibility, and in which a transition towards adulthood is taking place. Cairns (2014) calls attention to the significance of mobility, in particular student mobility in youth, 2

Although student mobility, and especially degree-seeking mobility, falls under the definition of migration, in this study I will still call it student mobility. It is the term generally used and, as Amelina states, “[…] there appears to be an analytical need for a mobility turn that takes mobility as the more general and more inclusive term and understands migration as a specific form of mobility” (Amelina & Vasilache, 2014, p. 111)

From international students…

7

since this period in life is often also characterised by increased geographical mobility, be it by choice or by necessity. Youth mobility can provide a social opportunity for young people to step outside of their local contexts and broaden their scope for action – which, under certain circumstances, can lead to an opportunity for social fulfilment (see Clark, 2015). Nevertheless, like the discourse on the internationalisation of HEIs in general, discourses about international students in particular also concentrate mainly on their total numbers, on the length of time they spend abroad, or on quantifying their movements and the revenue they bring to the host institution and the host country (OECD 2001) and less on the circumstances which enable fruitful and fulfilling student mobility. The consequences and advantages for students after their studies abroad are also discussed, as well as state policies and regulations, e.g. see Klabunde (2014). When international students and their movements are seen in terms of numbers, profit and prestige, though, they are viewed and analysed as a homogeneous group, neglecting the perspective of the individual international students and their own perception of their situation in life. “The experiences of foreign students in many ways challenge the traditional understanding of an international education and the categorization of a traditional international student. Focusing almost exclusively on nationality as an organizing agent and bereft of significant and robust concepts that bring into view the content of international student sense-making, international education discourses neglect to explore the complexity and range of meanings students ascribe to educational sojourns, thereby resulting in a series of undocumented generalizations about students” (Gargano, 2012, p. 144). It is this complexity and range of meanings that I aim to capture in this study.

8

Internationalisation myths and transnational realities

Additionally, the literature on international students focusses more on Erasmus students and less on degree-seeking students: “Outside of Erasmus, rather little is known about degree-mobile students who move within Europe: the statistics are patchy and the evidence partly anecdotal. Part of the statistical problem is how degreemobile students are defined – by their ‘foreign’ citizenship, birthplace, habitual residence or country of prior residence.” (King, 2016, p. 17) Often, the focus of surveys or studies is on difficulties and problems students (might) have in specific countries, thereby not only homogenising international students, but also simultaneously characterising them as needy and viewing the internationalisation of higher education through a mainly national lens. Commonly, international students are framed as those who have to be prepared for their time abroad through language courses and cultural training. They are the ones who need to adjust in order to be integrated into the host HEI and supposedly have to be supported in ways specific to their needs as international students. Such approaches are mainly deficit-oriented, implying that international students lack linguistic, cultural or social skills (see also Gargano, 2009). They also lead HEIs to offer solutions that single out and stigmatise international students and other mobile members of HEIs, and to group them into specific courses for them only. While these can be partial solutions giving the students a chance to study at an institution, at the same time they create environments that segregate them further, and do not integrate them into everyday life. Instead, HEIs could seize the opportunity to question institutional structures and practices, and their underlying understandings of internationalisation. Stohl (2007) points out that international students can, in fact, potentially cause difficulties by constituting an irritating factor in institutional functionings. Their presence

… to transnational social networks

9

questions common norms and challenges established values, leading to unfamiliar situations and interactions (see also Schäfers, 2010). As Stohl argues, staff are not yet used to working in ways which include all students per se and therefore prefer to shift this responsibility to specifically designed offices and organisations, e.g. international offices. Since this is not a sustainable solution for all, Stohl supports an understanding of internationalisation based on reciprocity: “If we think of internationalization as how faculty and students (as well as administrators) learn about, learn from, and learn with others, we suggest that internationalization has value in and of itself” (Stohl, 2007, p. 369). 2.2

… to transnational social networks

In the light of the above developments in the internationalisation of HEIs and of global mobility and migration processes, an encompassing perspective such as that suggested by Stohl (2007) is needed: one which does not view internationalisation as a process induced by exchanges between institutions, or by individuals moving from one nation to another (= inter-national). Instead, a shift to a relational perspective and a broader view on interactions is overdue. Considering Manderscheid’s (2014a) criticism of how discourses on mobility focus on the individual, this thesis also aims to take into account the “spatial, cultural, political, economical, social and personal context” of international students’ (im)mobilities (Manderscheid, 2014b, p. 188). Moreover, a second shift, away from the nation state as a unit of analysis and towards a transnational perspective, provides a flexible, comprehensive theoretical and analytical framework (see Glick Schiller et al. 1992) and allows phenomena emerging from the field, such as students’ transnationalisation processes, to be located and analysed (cf. Mau, 2010). Adopting this perspective, Mau states that any relationship

10

Internationalisation myths and transnational realities

between one person and another from or currently in another country is transnational. Meanwhile, Gargano (2009), focussing on international students, states that “International students must negotiate transnational social fields or networks that cross national boundaries and develop social networks of associations that maintain social, familial, economic, religious, and political relations with contexts of origin.” (p. 336) What is more, Pries (2007) proposes the reconceptualisation of different types of transnational social spaces, including institutions. In line with these understandings and proposals, this thesis considers international students as creators, fosterers and negotiators of transnational social fields, due to the fact that in their everyday lives they link different contexts and spatial fields, criss-crossing and transcending national borders. They “operate in an ever changing and mobile world” (Gargano 2009, p. 178) and their communication technologies “include instant messaging, e-mail, social networking sites, streaming videos, and cell phones. Today, students travel to contexts of origin, visit friends at universities throughout the U.S. and abroad, and welcome family for campus visits.” (ibid.) These students influence the contexts they operate in, creating multiple transnational interlinkages of various types. The approach this thesis is based upon broadens Mau’s definition of what is transnational to include any kind of relationship which international students view as a being part of their everyday lives: they not only interact with other people, but also engage with places, institutions, ideas, groups, traditions etc., which they locate within and/or beyond the borders of the nation they are currently in. By crossing and transcending them, they diminish the relevance of borders, including national borders, in their everyday lives – although they do still remain quite relevant. Therefore, the understanding of “transnational” used here is based on the current

… to transnational social networks

11

notion of the nation state as a fixed, static geographical category. The “trans”, in turn, expresses the fluid and multiplex ways in which international students’ networks and practices, along with the symbols and artefacts (see Pries, 2008) in their lives, blur and transcend the geographically based category of the nation state. International students constantly weave transnational connections, which Vertovec (2002) also frames as future networks of highly skilled migrants. Here, I view these networks as social networks which have the potential of influencing all contexts within which the students are active. I wish to play a role in “illuminating and emphasizing the interconnectedness of students across geographical spaces and virtual societies” (Gargano, 2009, p. 179) and, more generally, across social spaces. This interconnectedness can best be methodologically captured by adopting an “action- and actor-centered perspective” (Schröer & Schweppe 2011, p. 7) and combining it with Glick Schiller and Fouron’s (1999) definition of transnational social spaces as “an unbounded terrain of interlocking egocentric networks” (p. 344). This methodological understanding is in line with De Jong and Teekens (2003), who emphasise the importance of actor-centred approaches in higher education research: “Students from a variety of cultural backgrounds are themselves important sources of information. [...] Instruction is becoming communication and the national orientation is becoming a global one. The role that students play in their own learning pathways – not only in terms of content but above all, in terms of method – is making them more than simple consumers of information, but above all, producers of knowledge” (p. 47). HEIs are created as spaces in which knowledge is supposed to be produced, negotiated, discussed, shared and questioned. By viewing international students as “agents of change” that contribute to the “emergence of transnational social

12

Internationalisation myths and transnational realities

formations and social spaces” (Schröer & Schweppe, 2011, p. 7), this thesis hopes to do justice to this reality and show how “the institutional framework itself [as well as how it is understood, A.A.] is changed by the strategies adopted by individuals and organizations as actors in the migration process” 3 (Hillmann & Rudolph, 1997, p. 249, translation by the author).

3

„Der Institutionenrahmen selbst wird allerdings auch durch die Strategien von Individuen und Organisationen als Akteuren im Migrationsprozeß verändert.”

3

Research design and research question

As described in the previous chapter, international students’ subjective perspectives need to be considered when it comes to processes taking place in and related to higher education institutions and to their internationalisation. Nevertheless, such processes cannot be simplistically defined as induced by something (e.g. dialogue) happening between nations and limited in time and space. By introducing a transnational perspective, the continuity and actual complexity of so-called internationalisation processes can be better grasped. If relationships are seen as at the core of such processes, a research design is required that does justice to that fact. Therefore, in this thesis I place those relationships that are important in international students’ everyday lives at the heart of the analysis, and focus on their meanings and characteristics. Amongst social research methods, qualitative social network analysis offers an opportunity to collect, reconstruct and analyse the subjective meanings ascribed to relationships (cf. Hollstein & Straus, 2006 and Diaz-Bone, 2006 and 2007 4 ). More specifically, qualitative egocentric network analysis deals with the centrality of an individual’s perspective by placing the person at the centre of the observation while enquiring about their relationships. Although the perspective adopted in this methodology is a person-centred one, focussing on their network means the findings are not restricted to one subject. 4

Qualitative network analysis itself can be seen as a criticism of methodological individualism (see Diaz-Bone, 2007), proposing a shift towards structural analysis. This approach conceives of people as within networks and therefore constantly involved in and influenced by interaction.

© The Editor(s) (if applicable) and The Author(s), under exclusive license to Springer Fachmedien Wiesbaden GmbH, part of Springer Nature 2020 A. Altissimo, Beings, Belongings and Places, Wissenschaft – Hochschule – Bildung, https://doi.org/10.1007/978-3-658-31364-7_3

14

Research design and research question

In this study, which deals with transnationalism and starts out from the presumption that international students co-create transnational spaces, a method of this kind is particularly suitable: after all, Glick-Schiller and Fouron define transnational social spaces as “an unbounded terrain of interlocking egocentric networks” (p. 544), as described above. These research aims therefore led to the choice of a qualitative egocentric network approach. More specifically, it informed the decision to work with narrative network interviews as a qualitative research method offering insights into respondents’ understandings while enabling the collection of data about the students’ networks. The focus in this thesis is therefore primarily on the quality, intensity and form of the students’ relationships. It offers insights into how international students are linked with people, places, activities and other important entities in their everyday lives, describing their interconnectedness. This can help expose contexts which are relevant in internationalisation processes and which were previously unknown or not taken into account. 3.1

Preparing the interviews

These considerations paved the way for the creation of an interview guide for non-structured, narrative interviews to be conducted with international students. I worded the interview questions so that the students could map out their relations on a semi-standardised network map on paper while talking about them. The map and the interview questions are therefore to be considered as a single unit within the methodology. Throughout the preparation of the project and while getting ready to conduct the interviews, I relied upon Helfferich (2011), Flick, von Kardorff and Steinke (2004), Kruse (2011), Porst (2008) and Silverman (2013), who provide information, guidelines and examples of how to create an interview

Preparing the interviews

15

guide, find interview partners, configure the interview situation, structure and conduct the interview, document and handle the data and prepare the data analysis. 3.1.1 Network map and interview guide My intention was to conceive the interview as a situation in which the international students could speak as freely as possible about their relationships with entities while placing them on network maps. Such maps differ greatly in terms of their design and level of structuredness. 5 Hollstein and Pfeffer (2010) note that the more pre-structured the maps are, the less possible it becomes to gain an insight into the interviewees’ understandings and the meanings they make of their ties. The first two interviews for this study were conducted with a completely unstructured map: the respondents (also called “ego” in network analysis) were asked to map out important relationships (with so-called “alters”) on a blank sheet of paper. However, my interlocutors found it challenging to structure and handle the sheet of paper while discussing their relationships. 5

A classification of network maps as suggested by Hollstein & Pfeffer (2010): 1) Unstructured network maps (cf. Scheibelhofer 2006): respondents are free to create the map themselves according to their ideas. This method is generally used as a stimulus for the narration. 2) Structured and non-standardised network maps (e.g. Straus 1995): the map already features structuring elements (e.g. concentric circles and sectors). The meaning of the circles and sectors is not predefined; respondents are free to assign them their subjective meaning. 3) Structured and standardised network maps (Kahn & Antonucci 1980): the map already contains structuring elements, which have a predefined meaning (e.g. circles = emotional closeness and sectors = spheres of life or geographical places).

16

Research design and research question

It also became clear after an attempt to analyse the first maps that a minimal level of similarity between them would facilitate the endeavour. Therefore, I altered the map: for the rest of the interviews it consisted in four concentric circles on a large sheet of paper (DIN A2, 42 x 59,4 cm). This kind of map is derived from Kahn and Antonucci’s maps (Kahn & Antonucci, 1980; Antonucci, 1986) and can be described as structured and semi-standardised (with predefined concentric circles, without segments). It therefore offers a minimum of structure but still leaves individual freedom and flexibility for the respondents when discussing the relationships with entities and placing them on the map.

Figure 1 Network map (adapted from Kahn and Antonucci 1980 and Antonucci 1986)

In conjunction with the map, the questions in the interview guide (see annex) helped to structure the interview situation. Nevertheless, the guide is more an aid to remember the most important topics and to keep the narration flowing. It collects a few broader main questions, additional follow-up questions, and secondary questions asking for more detail and clarification on topics and statements made by the respondent during the interview. None of

Preparing the interviews

17

these questions are compulsory, and the order of questions asked during the interview is derived from the logic of the preceding narration (less from the structure of the interview guide). The idea behind this procedure is that the questions about important alters, the relationships between ego and alters and between the alters can themselves lead to self-perpetuating narratives which the respondents develop on their own by discussing one relationship after another in the order they prefer, requiring fewer follow-up questions and less guidance by the interviewer. The creation of the network map and the narrative therefore went hand in hand throughout the interview and led to a common set of data in two different formats. 3.1.2 Interview structure The interviews began with information about my research project, about how I would store, anonymise and handle the data. I mentioned that the conversation could be interrupted or ended at any given time and that the respondent could choose whether and how to answer the questions, and asked the respondents for their informed consent. The first question was formulated as an open question asking the person to talk about themselves, e.g. “Could you tell me something about yourself in general?” The intention of this initial prompt is to enable the respondent to start talking and become accustomed to the interview setting, and to create a more personal atmosphere. At the same time, it offered me, as the interviewer, a chance to understand what the person's current main points of reference might be. If the respondent asked for a more specific stimulus, follow-up questions about their current and previous activities, and about motives for their activities, introduced a variety of possible topics. Usually, after this introductory session, I laid out the sheet with the

18

Research design and research question

network map (four concentric circles) on the table alongside felt-tip pens and small sticky notes in four different colours. The respondents could interact freely with the map, draw on it and shape it as needed (see Hollstein & Pfeffer, 2010). At this point, I asked the interviewee (“ego”) to name a few relationships which were important to them (“alters”), write them on sticky notes and briefly explain why they were important: “Could you please list a few relationships to people, places, organisations, things, ideas, points in time, activities or anything important to you? And could you please tell me why/how they are important/tell me more about this relationship?” Some of the respondents would list a few important alters first and then start describing their relationships to them. Others would proceed one by one, first naming the alters, then placing them on the map and then explaining how they were connected. The first few interviews showed that interviewees felt the need to include non-human entities such as important places, organisations etc. as alters in their network. This understanding of alters fits the project’s understanding in which places, things, organisations, ideas, activities, points in time, beliefs etc. can play major roles in international students’ everyday lives besides people. Thus, in order to include such entities, the question was adapted and also hinted at other, non-person entities such as organisations, places, points in time, or plans, leaving space for their own interpretations of important entities. The prompt for relevant relationships induced the mentioning and a description of the alters, as well as some information about the relationship between ego and alter(s). In a few cases, the respondents would write more than one entity on one sticky note or they would use a term indicating a group of people or various places and then describe them either as a group or as separate individuals or

Preparing the interviews

19

places. The question of why the alters mentioned were important then entailed a detailed description of the relationships between the students and their important alters. In the next step, the respondents were then asked to place the sticky notes with the alters anywhere on the map, closer or farther away from the central circle, i.e. from themselves (or whatever else they had placed in the central circle), depending on how important the respective alter was. As they did so, I asked them to describe the relationship in more detail, e.g. “Can you now place them on the map closer to or farther away from you in the centre, according to how important they are to you, and tell me something about this relationship?” Next, the conversation focused on the relationship between the alters. The main intention during this step was to broaden the perspective towards the relationships amongst all the entities on the map, their role and meaning in the network. Narratives of this kind about relationships that are not directly connected to ego are also very relevant because they provide an insight into the influence that alter-alter relations may have on ego and vice versa, and on the network in general. Questions which supported the narration at this stage asked why the relationship was important, what the link between ego and the alter(s) consisted in, how the relationship had come into existence and how it was maintained. During this step, some respondents would regroup their alters into clusters and subclusters to show (how) they belonged together. Others used sticky notes in different colours to visualise groups. Yet others marked a belonging to a specific group or context on the sticky note, e.g. one respondent added a “U” on all the sticky notes with people belonging to the context of the university. If respondents had not mentioned non-human entities by this point, they were prompted to do so by being asked about them specifically. From time to time, the interviewees were invited to add to the map by the question “Are

20

Research design and research question

any important relationships missing now?” to create as comprehensive a picture as possible. This procedure aimed at obtaining data about existing relationships between ego and the alters, and between alters, to answer the research questions about the characteristics of the relationships constituting the students’ network and the support to be found in them. Another question concerning international students’ relationships, aimed especially at understanding where international students perceive support in their everyday life, asked “Are any relationships missing here because they do not actually exist (yet), but should ideally be on here?” This gave the respondents the opportunity to assess whether the current network met their ideal or whether they lacked relationships within it. Similarly, the following question also offered the chance to discuss discrepancies between the existing network composition and that of the respondents’ ideal network: “Would you prefer any one of the relationships to be different?” In this case, interviewees could express their wishes concerning existing relationships which were not (yet) ideal. The accounts following this question can reveal what students perceive as relationships’ latent potential and how it might be unleashed. This question also drew the respondents’ attention to problematic relationships, e.g. conflictual or burdensome ones, or to relationships in which certain aspects were underdeveloped or the relationships did not fulfil the respondents’ expectations. Towards the end of the interview, the question “If you look at the map now, is there anything else you would like to say about this?” offered respondents the chance to add to the narrative and develop it further in quite an unrestricted manner. This often also led respondents to reflect upon what they had mapped out and described. These last two questions were about possible relationships which the students felt would strengthen their

Research questions

21

networks and increase the quality and helpfulness of the relationships in them. 3.2

Research questions

Before starting collecting data, I made presumptions about what my interview partners might talk about, based on my research interest (see Chapter 1): I collected suppositions about what information they would give me, and what might or might not become relevant in the interviews. This exercise was designed to raise my awareness of my own understandings and pre-existing views having reviewed the literature on the topic. Further, it enabled me to collect questions to address within this project. In the following, I list the research questions leading this study and answer them with multiple presumptions. 1) How, where, why, and in what form do international students’ relationships come into being and develop? What role do they play in their everyday lives? Various scenarios and contexts play a role in international students’ lives, e.g. higher education institutions, sports, public places, parties, the Internet. It is here that their relationships come into being. Some relationships with others are initiated by the international students, who wish to get to know their peers and their everyday environments. Their transnational relationships are mainly with friends and family from before their departure to study abroad. All these relationships need to be cultivated; managing them requires time and effort, particularly transnational relationships. The role which relationships (especially transnational ones) play in international students’ everyday lives is that they influence and structure their daily lives, activities and routines. There may be, for example, a dependency on transnational relationships and an orientation

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Research design and research question

towards transnational relationships, which may also be a prerequisite for their time abroad. Such transnational relationships may not be visible to others, but may still have an impact on the students’ lives: they may have to comply with obligations towards their sending HEI, a future HEI, a future employee, family or friends. I then focus on the formation and characterisation of international students’ relationships and ask: 2) When, where and how do international students experience support in their everyday lives? International students may or may not receive, provide, desire, or lack support in many ways and places. Their support networks involve other students: students are students’ main resource for support. Peers, not institutions, provide the various kinds of support needed. The students’ support networks are transnational: they provide them with support from abroad and also from the country they are currently living in. Specific local or transnational relationships provide specific kinds of support; for instance, both transnational and local contacts may provide emotional support, whereas only local relationships can provide instrumental support. Based on the answers to the above questions, I then examine the extent to which transnationalism is relevant in the relationships international students describe. The research question arising here is:

Research questions

23

3) How is internationality or transnationalism produced or revealed in international students’ relationships? Internationality is produced by communication and interaction. The students discuss or describe certain topics as especially relevant to international students’ lives or exclusive to transnational relationships: e.g. getting by in new environments, at the new HEI, bridging cultures, or receiving support. Finally, regarding the interrelationship between transnationalism and HEIs in the students’ relationships, I ask: 4) When, where and how are HEIs relevant to international students’ relationships? Which (institutional) measures do international students perceive and which do they make use of? Support networks related to HEIs and HEIs show up in international students’ support networks: they provide a context for the networks and facilitate or inhibit them. HEIs also provide a time frame for relationships. It can also be the case that students’ networks are not related to HEIs: HEIs might not show up at all in international students’ (support) networks, either as supporting or as inhibiting entities. Having collected the research questions and possible answers to them, in the following chapter I describe the sampling, the data collection and its analysis.

4

Sampling, data collection & analysis

I collected the data for this study via qualitative interviews with international students in Germany and Canada in the summer and autumn of 2012. I chose these two starting points for my data collection on the one hand due to their size and diversity, and on the other hand because of their accessibility to me. The results of the data analysis from the first interviews fed into the subsequent steps of the data collection and initial assumptions, meaning that the process leading up to the results was a spiralling one. The following describes all the steps from the sampling to the data analysis in more detail. 4.1

Sampling

This study aspired to obtain a variety of concepts and understandings of supportive relationships for international students by choosing a heterogeneous sample with respect to the respondents’ age, gender, course of study and provenience. The final sampling procedure therefore involved approaching international students via different channels. I contacted various international offices at Higher Education Institutions in Germany and Canada and asked them to forward an email inviting international students to get in touch with me for an interview. I also posted similar invitations as announcements on billboards at various HEIs. I sent emails to friends and acquaintances who knew international students or had access to mailing lists that might also include international students. Finally, I also wandered around campuses looking for international students. I would listen to the languages the people spoke and would then approach them, explain what I was interested in and ask whether they were international students themselves. © The Editor(s) (if applicable) and The Author(s), under exclusive license to Springer Fachmedien Wiesbaden GmbH, part of Springer Nature 2020 A. Altissimo, Beings, Belongings and Places, Wissenschaft – Hochschule – Bildung, https://doi.org/10.1007/978-3-658-31364-7_4

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Sampling, data collection & analysis

Many were Erasmus, PhD or language students, but if they were degree-seeking international students, I would ask whether they were available for an interview and take down their e-mail address. Some Erasmus students and language students also agreed to pass on my invitation to degree-seeking students they knew. Others offered to post my call online and to spread it in mailing lists they knew about. I feared it could be perceived as impolite and discriminating to approach people in this manner, especially as I was addressing them as international students because they were speaking a language that made me assume they might fall into this category. Nevertheless, I encountered friendliness and interest; people were keen to take part in the study and to spread the word. In the end, I had collected and received around thirty international students’ e-mail addresses. The final sample consisted in fourteen interviews with international students from all over the world, enrolled in various courses, among others maths, adult education, philosophy, special needs education, media studies and social work. They were between 20 and 40 years old and were studying in Germany or in Canada. 6 The interviews also took place in the cities they were studying, in public places such as cafés, cafeterias, canteens or libraries. They lasted from 45 minutes up to 2.5 hours. After each interview, I would take notes about the interview itself, the interview situation, any ideas, and questions I thought I could integrate into future interviews. I will describe the process from data collection to data analysis in more detail in the following chapter.

6

I have refrained from listing and characterising the participants in the study more precisely, so as to preserve their anonymity. Further, all names, most places and activities have been anonymised.

Data analysis: methods & procedure 4.2

27

Data analysis: methods & procedure

In this study, data collection and analysis are understood as a spiralling or circular process. This iterative procedure draws from Grounded Theory Methodology (GTM) (Strauss & Corbin, 1998), which aims at grounding a (new) theory from concrete, empirical data. I adapted GTM while integrating the analytical steps into a spiralling process, drawing from narration analysis and GTM (Przyborski & Wohlrab-Sahr, 2008, p. 181 ff.). The collection of two different but equivalent types or formats of data during the interviews – the accounts and the network maps – required strategies to best analyse them while respecting them in their uniqueness. First of all, to have a similar starting point, both the narratives and the network maps were “translated” into text: the maps were described in detail and the interviews were fully transcribed. Both sets of data were subsequently analysed in group sessions; see Reichertz (2013) and Reichertz (2016) about possible approaches to data analysis in groups and its features and advantages. The analysis of the narratives and network maps is described below. 4.2.1 Analysis of the maps At the beginning of the project, the literature contained scant few descriptions of the processes used for the qualitative analysis of social network maps. Therefore, the procedure for handling the maps had to be developed during the project. However, the method developed by Herz, Peters and Truschkat (2015) to describe and analyse network maps proved useful; we followed steps adopted from Herz et al.’s approach to qualitative structural

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Sampling, data collection & analysis

analysis (QSA 7). The first focus was on structural aspects: we posed questions related to the structures visible on the map, e.g.: Where is ego? Where are the alters? Are there any subgroups or clusters? Are there any alters in comparable positions to others? Are any parts of the map connected in a particularly dense manner? (Cf. Herz et al., 2015). The second step in Herz et al.’s procedure consists in describing the positions of the alters on the map. Again, some questions guided us in describing the map in detail, e.g.: Where are which alters? Are there alters with a particularly high or low number of connections? Are there any alters connecting subclusters to one other? (ibid.) Finally, we collected assumptions about the general structure of the map, providing an explanation for it. At this point, based on the analyses with my colleagues, I created a written description of the map and collected assumptions from the map regarding topics to be looked into further, dynamics that had become visible or connections that might be revealing. This procedure, derived from what is known as “open coding” in GTM terminology (Strauss & Corbin, 1998), provided preliminary concepts to work with in the analysis of the narrative, which I will describe in the next subchapter. In this thesis, I will not go into detail about our experiences with the mapping technique during the interviews or the analysis, as I have described that elsewhere (Altissimo, 2016). However, this study revealed that network map interviews are a particularly rewarding 7

“QSA combines analytical perspectives of structural analysis from SNA and analytical standards taken from qualitative social research by introducing qualitative procedures (sequential analysis, sensitizing concepts, memos) to analyse network maps and narrative data […].” (Altissimo, 2016, p. 1)

Data analysis: methods & procedure

29

method of data collection that can lead to a rich narrative and thus to profound insights. Ryan, Mulholland and Agoston (2014), Ryan (2016) and Müller, Olivier-Mensah, Herz, Altissimo and Perimental (2017) describe their experiences with interviews of this kind, including the interaction with the map which takes place during the interview, the particularities of this situation, difficulties that can arise and ways to deal with them. The data was analysed in interpretation sessions during which my colleagues and I looked into various specific aspects of the maps. The composition of these groups of researchers varied, offering a variety of views and interpretations to draw from, and included fellow PhDs, junior researcher groups, students or colleagues. 4.2.2 Analysis of the interviews As with the maps, the analysis of the narrative took place in groups of three to five people in different settings. Jointly, we looked into specific passages from the interview that were self-contained both in content and form. I chose the passages by reading the interview transcripts and picking out recurring themes, topics that the interviewees had discussed extensively or frequently, and particularly emotional passages. Further, we usually analysed the opening sequence and the last sequence, since these often contain particularly dense narratives. The analysis of the map (see above) also influenced the choice of passages as well as notes taken after the interviews, in which I collected dominant topics and ideas. These notes contained observations, experiences and ideas about the topics discussed during the interview, the interview situation, and the use of the map. The insights from the analyses of the first interviews led to a sensitised rephrasing of interview questions and to the use of structured network maps instead of blank sheets of paper, as described above.

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Sampling, data collection & analysis

As in the procedure in GTM and narration analysis, the codes (or topics) emerging from the assumptions and the questions that I put into writing after the analysis of the maps, and from the analysis of other interviews and of previous sections in the same interviews, led to or reinforced the choice of further sequences from the accounts. Generally, theoretical sampling means “the process of data collection for generating theory whereby the analyst jointly collects, codes and analyses his data and decides what data to collect next and where to find them, in order to develop his theory as it emerges” (Glaser & Strauss 1967, p. 45). Throughout the analysis process, I switched between the data formats, i.e. between the network maps and the narrative data from the network mapping interviews. However, with each interview, I usually first analysed the map and then sections from the interview, so as to approach the map without having any results or explanations from the narrative in mind at that stage. After these steps, I collected the written analyses of the data and also any preliminary theorisations. Having gained an understanding of all the interviews, I analysed three of them in more depth. The choice of the three interviews was based on the first insights from the analysis and on their general divergences: there was as much contrast between them as possible. In this thesis, the first case (the interview with Luis Alberto) exemplifies the process of analysis, including the interaction between the analysis of the map and that of the narrative. In the other cases, I present the results in detail, without also exposing the methodology.

Data analysis: methods & procedure

31

Short profile of cases Luis Alberto Hernandez Garcia, 37, is the oldest respondent in the sample and has been living, working and studying in Hamburg for the past nine years. He describes a number of important relationships, a feeling of loneliness that pervades his network and the lack of a partner. Meanwhile, Seung-min Won, who came to Germany four years ago and recently moved from Bonn to Hamburg, describes a strong connection to the other members of a religious community that welcomed her upon her arrival; she is now 27 years old and in a partnership with a German person. Finally, Nevena Adam came to Germany due to her husband's job rather than to study, but is now studying, as the only means of gaining employment. She explains that although she does have quite a few connections, it does not feel like a group of people. Having analysed these three interviews in depth (see Chapter 5), as well as data from a number of sections from additional interviews, I collected all the codes that had emerged and focused on those patterns that linked some of them to one another (similarly to axial coding in GTM). Having grouped the codes (e.g. “modes of connection to alters”) into patterns (e.g. “isolation and loneliness or inclusion and connection”), I then focused on specific sequences from the data which I expected to reveal more about those patterns. Connecting information from the narratives to the way the relationships were mapped out on the network maps also provided further insights as well as food for thought, leading to further enquiry. In this step, the two different data formats offer the opportunity to continue the analysis, “focussing on how they [the results from each set of data] do and do not converge: where they provide converging, diverging or complementary information about the network in general, about ego, the alters in ego's life, the connections in the network, and their roles and meanings to ego.” (Altissimo,

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Sampling, data collection & analysis

2016, par. 10.1) The patterns can thus be concentrated and defined more precisely. Finally, the next step then led to the dimensions which subsume the patterns. The dimensions, described in Chapter 6, comprise the different manifestations of the patterns and are therefore broad in nature. As discussed in Chapter 7, they link back to the research question and the data, and offer answers, while embedding the results in current research. 4.2.3 Subjectivity and positioning Before devoting myself to the analysis of the data, I will dedicate a few thoughts to the process of self-reflection that took place during the project. The conversations led me to think more intensely about my position in the discussion with my interviewees. I asked myself how I view, construct and position myself, how my research partners frame themselves and how we view and co-construct each other (see Nowicka & Ryan, 2015; Chereni, 2014). Finally, I engaged with the role of subjectivity in the social sciences (see Reichertz, 2015). The starting point for my self-positioning is the understanding that I can define myself and others as someone definite, e.g. in the interview situation I am supposedly “a researcher” and my interlocutor is “an international student”, although that is not what we are per se. During the research process I engaged in research as a PhD student and was geographically mobile, amongst other reasons for the research itself. Some of my interview partners implied that I probably knew some of the experiences and the feelings they were expressing and what international students’ lives might be like from my own personal experience. Upon being confronted with these suppositions, I was uncertain whether to position myself more clearly in order to make sure that my conversation partners would not omit relevant information because they assumed I did not need

Data analysis: methods & procedure

33

it. The other possibility was to go along with their assumption, not interrupting their flow of speech by explaining my actual background, knowledge or ignorance of the topic under discussion. In fact, at various such moments I could relate to what my interlocutors were describing from my own past life, for instance my experience of studying, mobility and migration. Nevertheless, since the situations I had been in, my experiences, their backgrounds and the consequences might have been quite different to theirs, I usually invited them to explain them from their point of view without specifying what I knew or did not know from my experience. It is this process of encouraging openness instead of categorisations that I wish to discuss in the following section. Researchers are supposedly able to act as insiders, giving them easier access to data and its underlying meanings. My experiences might thus be expected to have helped me during the interviews and the analysis of the data by providing me with a first-hand understanding of certain expressions, statements or situations. However, the underlying idea of insider research assumes that the research is in a clearly defined field. It also implies that insiders can understand the data better than others because they possess knowledge available only to them. But what is seen as insider knowledge may strongly obscure and conceal others’ interpretations and personal understandings, leading to false conclusions. Researchers who position themselves might lead to interviewees believing that their interviewers already know what they are talking about and therefore omit important information, descriptions and details: “Miscommunication may occur when the speaker assumes more similarity in perspective with the listener than actually exists” (Nowicka & Ryan, 2015, paragraph 8) – and, I would add, when the listener does not question this assumption. Assuming less similarity in perspective with the listener helps move towards a reasonable,

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Sampling, data collection & analysis

realistic perspective. Researchers need not fear being total outsiders and not understanding their interlocutor, “since one can always find some shared subject position with participants” (Chereni, 2014, paragraph 10). Apart from restricting researchers in terms of their selfunderstanding, categorising can also lead to respondents feeling uneasy if they do not perceive themselves as belonging to the category they are assumed to be in. This might even disrupt the conversation. Summing up, “the straightforward dualism of insider/outsider hardly captures the dynamism and fluidity of the researcher-participant relationship” (Chereni 2014, paragraph 9) and a categorisation into insiders and outsiders in research brings various disadvantages. The alternative approach that I am suggesting here is based on self-reflexivity and flexibility, assuming that the identities of those who participate in the research and their positionings are the everchanging result of dynamic relationships. This approach sees the interview as a social encounter in which processes of bonding and bridging may occur, in which positions are taken and abandoned, in which commonalities are constructed and de-constructed, and which allow those involved to use and redefine group categories and fixed concepts (e.g. of ethnicity) to suit their momentary needs (cf. Nowicka & Ryan, 2015). This understanding of the interview situation requires an approach in which trust and rapport need to be actively negotiated and are not based on putative commonalities. Instead of reducing “complex social worlds through the use of simple categories that fix people to groups and places”, Nowicka and Ryan (2015) recommend assigning an “active role to the respondent”, since this means acknowledging “the situational mode of respondent's knowledge production” (paragraph 10). Based on these understandings and approaches, the following chapters present the analysis of the interview data.

5

A lonesome warrior and a helpful community: the cases

The following chapters present the analyses of the interviews with international students and their findings. In this chapter, three of the interviews are analysed in depth. Since the interviews focus on who and what is important to the interviewees at a certain moment, a general picture of the specific person's life circumstances, the topics discussed in the interviews and important matters which have been brought up will be presented before each interview is analysed. 5.1

A lonesome warrior: Luis Alberto, a highly communicative loner

Luis Alberto is a 37-year-old student who has been living in Hamburg for the past nine years. He originally came on a scholarship to study biophysics, which he did for three years until he felt he could not pursue that course any longer. He changed subject and has been studying literature and Romance philology for the past five years. Due to the change, he was not allowed the grant any longer and had to start working to finance his studies. Luis Alberto has a diverse and numerous set of acquaintances, most of whom are in Hamburg, while others are in Peru. Luis Alberto is in constant touch with a few of his contacts, whom he talks to and helps out in a number of situations. Nevertheless, he comes to the conclusion that he himself and a few others actually feel quite lonely. The insights from the conversation with Luis Alberto will be presented here according to the following pattern. First, I will describe the analysis of the map Luis Alberto created during the interview, which will lead to the collection of topics and assumptions. Then, I © The Editor(s) (if applicable) and The Author(s), under exclusive license to Springer Fachmedien Wiesbaden GmbH, part of Springer Nature 2020 A. Altissimo, Beings, Belongings and Places, Wissenschaft – Hochschule – Bildung, https://doi.org/10.1007/978-3-658-31364-7_5

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A lonesome warrior and a helpful community: the cases

will present the analysis of the narrative with a broad collection of further topics. Finally, a third step aims at merging and condensing the main assumptions and coming to a joint conclusion. 5.1.1 Analysis of the map As our first step, my fellow researchers in the interpretation groups and I started by describing the map. As described above, the premise was that those analysing the data should not know much about the interviewee or about their narrative in order to let the map speak for itself. The following provides an initial summary of the results from the interpretation group’s description of Luis Alberto’s map (see Fig. 2 below). The process of the analysis and its results will be described in detail in this case, to provide an example of the map analysis procedure used in this study.

Figure 2 Luis Alberto’s network map

A lonesome warrior: Luis Alberto, a highly communicative loner 37 5.1.1.1 Map structure: split into two sections Firstly, looking at the map’s structure in general, a clear division into two is visible: there are four pink sticky notes on one side and twice as many orange ones on the other. The other two colours available have not been used. The centre of the map is filled by three orange and three pink sticky notes. While the three orange sticky notes in the centre are close together and seem to build a central cluster, the pink ones are not as close and are spaced out more. The orange sticky notes cover two thirds of the space on the map and spread out further than the pink ones. To sum up, the alters, which are all people – not ideas, places or other entities – are distinguished and separated by colour. The question arises of what this contrast means for Luis Alberto and for the network in general. 5.1.1.2 Ego-alter: links to family and to friends Having collected these first impressions of the map’s general structure, the group of researchers focused on the alters, their positions and their connection to ego (Luis Alberto). Since one of the pink alters in the centre is labelled “mother”, one initial assumption is that the other two closest pink alters are also likely to be family members. However, there is no arrow linking them, which contradicts the idea of them all being relatives. More probably, they are people who are important to Luis Alberto and connected to his mother, not necessarily by familial ties but by some other commonality. The names seem to have the same origin as Luis Alberto's name. Following this assumption, the pink cluster is assumed to be located abroad, in his former country of residence/country of origin. Finally, the single pink alter's position should be considered: this person is furthest from ego and connected only to ego's mother by a crossed-out arrow, which can be seen as standing for a conflict. One assumption is that, although she is important to him, this per-

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A lonesome warrior and a helpful community: the cases

son cannot be placed any closer to Luis Alberto because of a conflict between her and his mother. Turning to the orange alters and applying deductive logic to this cluster, the commonality symbolised by the colour could be their origin or their current place of residence, as it was for the pink group of people. But it could also be a common context (e.g. work/university) or status (e.g. student) connecting them. What is more, half of the names could be attributed to people from a migrant background (in Germany), the other half to people without. Since Luis Alberto himself is an international student, this probably indicates a group of people, most likely other students like him, some of whom are also international students. 5.1.1.3 Alter-alter connections: individual relatives and group of friends The interpretation group’s third step was to focus on the connections between the alters. This map shows a number of arrows. On one side there are various short, long, unidirectional, bidirectional and crossed out arrows between the orange sticky notes, connecting most of them. Among the alters on the orange sticky notes there is a subgroup which is particularly interconnected by bidirectional arrows. Marek, Oliver, Violeta, Liu Huan and Enrique constitute this group. Each of these people interacts with at least three others from the same group. There is no such interconnection among the people in the pink group. In fact, the only interaction shown between two people in the pink cluster (Anna and Mutter/Mother) has been crossed out, leaving Anna isolated in a marginal position in the third circle. The alters in the dominant orange cluster generally interact much more than those on the pink sticky notes, as the much greater number of arrows between them shows. Between the two groups, there is not much interaction. Only two pink alters

A lonesome warrior: Luis Alberto, a highly communicative loner 39 (Anarosa and Mutter/Mother) have contact with the same orange person, Silke, who in turn has one contact only: Marek (orange). Marek, on the other hand, occupies quite a central position and is the person with the most contacts, including one in the pink group: Fernando. Two people have a marginal position while at the same time being comparably well connected: Liu Huan in the third circle, with three connections (though one seems to be crossed out) and Enrique in the outermost circle, with three connections. This analysis of the connections helps to identify who might be particularly relevant for the respondent and supports the creation of assumptions concerning the structural composition of the network, which will be collected in the following. 5.1.1.4 Collecting topics, questions and assumptions from the map Having described the general structure of the map, the connections between ego and the alters, and those between the alters, the final step which the group of researchers undertook was to collect assumptions arising from their interpretations. A first set of preliminary assumptions derived from the steps described above can be summarised as follows: a) Big vs. small: Luis Alberto's network map is characterised by a division into two opposite sections on the right and on the left side of the map. The right section is numerically and spatially dominant over the left one, which is limited to three important alters in the first circle and one less important one in the second circle. b) Connected vs. not connected: the dominant orange group is internally well connected, with greater interconnectedness between its members, and especially in a subgroup. The other group of alters is not at all interconnected, including

40

A lonesome warrior and a helpful community: the cases an alter-alter connection marked as apparently conflictual, which may also influence the ego-alter connections. c) Complex vs. simple: the clear separation or even isolation of each of the contacts in the minor group leads to a simple picture, whereas the interconnectedness of the larger group entails a more complex and interwoven ego-alter and alteralter network, including a subnetwork. d) Dynamic vs. stable: when the map is examined taking the factor of time into account, it acquires a specific dynamic. The pink contacts have been in Luis Alberto’s network much longer than the orange ones, whom he presumably met on his arrival in Germany at the earliest. However, the latter are more present in his current life and therefore more important. The group in his home country can therefore be seen as being smaller but stabler. Meanwhile, the group situated in his current location is a more dynamic one which has changed over the years, assuming that not many international students or other mobile people stay in one country for a long time. e) Replaceable vs. fixed: finally, the above-mentioned dynamic in the orange group (situated where Luis Alberto currently is) also leads to recurrent alterations in its composition. A few alters in this groups are most probably international students or other mobile people. Due to their being mobile, the contacts in the now dominant group are not only newer and less stable, they are also more likely to be replaced by new ones when they leave. This makes them more replaceable a priori. By contrast, the link to the people in the group in Luis Alberto’s country of origin is more fixed. These contacts are unlikely to be replaced over time. It can be assumed that no one can actually take up the role of one of his contacts in his

A lonesome warrior: Luis Alberto, a highly communicative loner 41 country of origin (e.g. replace a relative), whereas someone else could more easily replace a contact's role in his current location (e.g. if one of his friends were to leave). All these opposing features distinguish two different clusters, which are barely linked to each other. It is only amongst the most important alters that there are two inter-cluster connections. This supports the assumption that there are two separate groups of people in Luis Alberto's current life, situated in different geographic locations, who have different functions and attributes. There also seems to have been a shift in the relationships: a few new connections have come into the network, slowly pushing out or replacing older ones. These now dominant contacts are newer than the others. While Luis Alberto has known his family all his life, and known his friends who are “not in Hamburg” for a longer time, he has only known his friends in Hamburg for a certain period of time: the time he has spent there studying. Moreover, it can be assumed that within the group of international students the fluctuation is higher than in other groups of friends, since students and mobile people (have to) leave after a certain period of time. Therefore, the contacts in the group of newer acquaintances can be considered to be newer and less established than those in the other group. At the same time, these newer contacts are currently dominant and can be supposed to have become increasingly relevant during the past few years. This idea that there has been an ongoing shift in Luis Alberto’s relationships, during which new connections have been introduced, taking the place of other, older ones, can be further developed. Although this is not visible on the map itself, the interview notes about the mapping process reveal that Luis Alberto recalls and lists the newer connections (located where he is currently living) first. One of the few contacts in the pink group, the diminishing group

42

A lonesome warrior and a helpful community: the cases

geographically farther away, was only added more than half an hour after the beginning of the interview and was not included in the first listing of important alters. This reinforces the supposition that the new contacts are slowly replacing the more long-lasting ones. Because the contacts abroad are geographically and physically not close, they are waning, which means there is room for “new” people. These people in his current location fulfil the roles of those abroad, since the latter cannot play their former role any longer. By now, only the most important contacts from the group abroad are left, which is why this group is quite small. Following a hypothesis of duplication according to the contacts' roles, Luis Alberto is little by little reproducing his former network in his current location of residence. The contacts who are most necessary to him abroad are also most necessary here. It is likely for him to be therefore reproducing the most important alters, e.g. parents and relatives, long-term friends, or their roles respectively, in Germany. 5.1.1.5 Conclusions As discussed in the above, the analysis of Luis Alberto's map leads to various assumptions about his relationships to and those between the people important to him. Luis Alberto has a group or a number of contacts in Hamburg, who, like him, seem to be internationally connected. These contacts are connected not only to him but also to each other. Further, he has connections to important alters living in another country, probably his country of origin. These are much fewer in number than the people in the first group but are also very important. They are not interconnected at all, unlike the group that can be assumed to be a group of friends in his current place of residence. The dominance of the alters in his current location is indicative of a shift in the network composition: the alters in his country of origin are not as present as they used to

A lonesome warrior: Luis Alberto, a highly communicative loner 43 be when he was still living there. They are therefore slowly vanishing from the map, which results in a much greater number of contacts in his current place of residence. These latter contacts therefore have to take up roles which were formerly inherent to contacts in his country of origin, i.e. the new contacts have become or are becoming substitutes of his long-standing, most important alters elsewhere/abroad. The unstable situation which characterises the group geographically close to him may also necessitate the constant replacement of its members due to its volatility. This requires flexibility on Luis Alberto's part to accept relationships that may be short-term in nature, and to allow them to become important others relatively quickly compared to the important contacts in the group of long-term contacts. The time factor plays a significant role in this whole process, since the frequent turnover and assumed fluctuation within Luis Alberto's network in Hamburg influences the overall composition of his whole network. Further, it can be assumed that Luis Alberto's current whereabouts also affect his connections: living for some time in his former country of residence would presumably renew the ties to his contacts there and might in turn weaken the ones to his contacts in Germany. In summary, the map analysis brings up the following questions: What do the sections on the map consist in? Are they reflected in the narrative, and if so, how? How does this apparent subdivision in the network affect Luis Alberto’s everyday life? What processes can be reconstructed to explain the change in the composition of the network? What other topics are related to the sections of the network, to this separation and to the apparent shift in the network composition? Examples include migration/mobility, status and the importance of roles vs. importance of people. What functions do the alters in each section fulfil? These topics, questions and

44

A lonesome warrior and a helpful community: the cases

assumptions will be used to fuel the analysis of the narrative and will support the choice of passages to be analysed. 5.1.2 Analysis of the narrative As explained in the description of the analysis methods, Luis Alberto's map was analysed before the narrative and independently of it. The next step then consisted in analysing the narrative stemming from the interview with Luis Alberto. In the following, I present its findings, pursuing the main topics arising from the analysis. 5.1.2.1 “They have slid into second place”: evaluating evolving friendships At the beginning of the interview, Luis Alberto presents a number of alters and describes why they are important to him. While doing so, he finds it difficult to rank them according to their importance. After he has named and positioned his best friend, however, the task becomes easier and he introduces eight other people who are important to him. Throughout the interview, he adds alters when they become relevant to his account. He furthermore adopts two systems to qualify the relationships: their duration and the frequency of contact. The most important people are those he has known the longest and with whom he is in most frequent contact, for example his mother and sister and a few of his friends. Nevertheless, the following examples show that if the two criteria, “duration of acquaintance” (1) and “frequency of contact” (2), are no longer fulfilled, the importance of the contact inevitably diminishes: (1) Duration: Luis Alberto’s Peruvian friends have a specific position in his constellation of contacts. At first he does not mention them as being amongst the most important. It is only after he has listed his contacts in Germany and his relatives, and after I have asked “So

A lonesome warrior: Luis Alberto, a highly communicative loner 45 these are the most important?”, that Luis Alberto mentions “a couple of Peruvian friends” 8. These friends are mentioned casually, almost fleetingly, as if they were not that important. Actually, they have lost importance, and have “slipped into second place by now” 9, as Luis Alberto then explains. These are people who used to rank first, but have lost their privileged status. Since the method used in the interview is based on arranging people on the map in concentric circles, Luis Alberto expands the logic to include people he cannot or does not want to position on the map. He explains that the downgrading is due to his having “more contact with these people [in Hamburg/Germany] at the moment, even more than with people from Peru” 10 . His contact with the people around him who are closer geographically is the factor that has led to the decline of the Peruvian relationships. He frames this as a temporary situation (“at the moment”), which demonstrates his belief that if he were to change locations and go back to Peru, the frequency of contact would shift and the Peruvian contacts would then slide back to their former position in first place. The shift which has occurred still seems to surprise him and he claims he finds it “a bit strange, too, but it just happened, right?” 11. Since the criterion “duration of contact” is fulfilled, these people should still be in first place and still be somehow important in his life. Nevertheless, the second criterion, “frequency of contact”, see below, is not fulfilled, which leads to the shift. He cannot fully grasp the reason for the change and states 8

“ich habe auch paar peruanische * Freunde”.

9

“die sind mittlerweile in einen zweiten Rang gerutscht”.

10

“also weil ich mit diese Menschen [in Hamburg/Deutschland] mehr Kontakt habe zur Zeit, als selbst mit Menschen aus Peru”.

11

“was ich auch ein bisschen merkwürdig finde, aber es ist einfach so passiert, ja?”

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A lonesome warrior and a helpful community: the cases

that it has happened by chance, although he has actually already supplied the explanation by mentioning the two main criteria. (2) Frequency: another friend's status (that of Julia) has also changed over time due to the contact not fulfilling one of the two criteria, although this time it is the criterion “frequency of contact” which has led to the downgrading: “The problem is that Julia is married and hasn’t got much time. And that’s why our friendship is very limited by that because she simply can’t do things.” 12 This shows that Luis Alberto has set an implicit standard according to which the relationships are evaluated. In this case, their not being able to meet often due to her being married and having no time, leads to the standard not being met, which he considers “the problem”. Therefore, although Luis Alberto likes her very much, he has had to downgrade the relationship: “I really like her and but we hardly have any time to see each other * and therefore she simply, yes, * inevitably goes into this second circle” 13. To sum up, both criteria should be fulfilled, otherwise contacts cannot be considered as very important. There are exceptions for which the two criteria need not be fulfilled: for example, if the duration of contact is long enough and if it is complemented by a hypothetical possibility of contact, as in the friendship with Jana. “Jana is a long-term friend of mine, who I see very rarely but who I value greatly.” 14 According to the criteria 12

“Das Problem ist, dass Julia verheiratet ist und wenig Zeit hat. Und deswegen ist unserer Freundschaft sehr eingeschränkt dadurch weil sie einfach nicht kann.”

13

“ich mag sie sehr, und aber wir haben kaum Zeit uns zu sehen * und dadurch kommt sie, ja*, einfach zwangsläufig erst mal in diesen zweiten Kreis.”

14

“Jana ist auch eine sehr langjährige Freundin von mir, die ich sehr selten seh’, aber die ich sehr schätze.”

A lonesome warrior: Luis Alberto, a highly communicative loner 47 above, not seeing Jana could lead to a drop in her importance. There have been times during which they have met only once every six months or even once a year. Nevertheless, the fact that they have known each other for a long time, since the very beginning of Luis Alberto's time in Germany (“but we know each other well… like since the very beginning” 15), compensates for this and gives her the opportunity to achieve a special status. This status makes their relationship so special that although they seldom meet, Luis Alberto can still say, “we are, we feel, we know we are there for each other” 16. Knowing they are available for each other and ready to support one another connects them. Luis Alberto describes this special connection as being “more of an intellectual nature” 17. This connection is so stable that it preserves their relationship over long time spans. Another particularly important person in Luis Alberto's network is his very good friend Marek. The two of them “meet at least once a week, like uhm regularly, well we talk about things very often” 18. This regularity, which Luis Alberto does not describe in most of the other relationships, makes it an especially important link. It also sets a standard according to which other friendships are measured, since here “very often” means “once a week at the least”. Luis Alberto and Marek often talk about their common situation and commonalities, which creates a very intense relationship: “with him […] it is very intense because I because we have a lot in common, work, studies, acquaintances (I: Yes) uuhm and then we have like 15

“aber wir kennen uns sehr... also seit der ersten Stunde”.

16

“also wir sind, wir fühlen, wir wissen wir sind füreinander da”.

17

“eine Verbindung, die eher geistiger Natur ist”.

18

“wir treffen uns mindestens einmal in der Woche, so ähm regelmäßig also tauschen uns sehr oft aus.”

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like like a like a always a conversation well an ongoing conversation like about our situation more or less huh?” 19. In what Luis Alberto calls an “ongoing conversation”, the two men perpetuate their friendship by talking about what they have in common. Finally, an awareness of the difficulty in finding male friends in Hamburg also strengthens Luis Alberto and Marek’s bond: “we both find it difficult [...] to make like male friendships like generally * in Hamburg, well that is kind of a fact for us both” 20. Their belief or knowledge that they will have difficulties in finding other male friends forges a strong bond between them. They have both ascertained that their current surroundings (Hamburg) are incompatible with any wishes they might have in this regard. Therefore, they pragmatically abide by their agreement to stick to one other: “and then we try to protect our friendship a bit or to protect the little we have” 21. The realisation that they have little and might even lose that due to their disadvantageous environment leads them to regard their friendship as a precious and fragile treasure. It is something that has to be protected, because it is so valuable, and which they have to jointly cultivate and preserve: “each of us makes

19

“mit dem [...] ist das sehr intensiv weil ich weil wir sehr Vieles gemeinsam haben, Arbeit, Studium, Bekanntschaften (I: Ja) ääh und dann haben wir so so so ein so ein immer son Gespräch also ein fortdauerndes Gespräch also über unsere Situation ne so ungefähr ne?”

20

“wir stellen beide fest dass es schwierig ist […] so mÄnnliche Freundschaften so insgesAmt * in Hamburg zu machen, also das ist für uns beide das=is irgendwie so eine Tatsache”.

21

“und dann versuchen wir unsere Freundschaft ein bisschen zu schützen oder das wenige, was wir da haben *zu schützen.”

A lonesome warrior: Luis Alberto, a highly communicative loner 49 efforts to meet at least once a week” 22. The friendship which means so much to them also means they have to show good will and invest in it. It must never be taken for granted and always requires their constant and active engagement. Simultaneously, Luis Alberto recognises that this is not how his other relationships usually work: “this is unusual, otherwise I don't have this systema=this system with other friends” 23. What keeps their friendship going is their commitment, which he characterises as “a system”, something they produce together according to specific rules, which in turn influence their behaviour and help establish the system. To keep their system running they feel they “have to somehow come up with something and do lots of things together” 24. What Luis Alberto and Marek have created and protect can also be seen as a “buddy system”: two people are allied to one another, agreeing to take care of, check on and guide each other, especially in difficult situations. The unit thus formed is designed to increase each of the two people's safety and well-being. Luis Alberto and Marek have formed a system of this kind: they regularly meet, talk and check up on each other, since they both consider their situation difficult. As Luis Alberto himself says, their “system” is unusual and requires a lot of time and commitment. This explains why he has adopted it with one friend only, but he takes it all the more seriously. All the above-mentioned and other fundamental commonalities (job, studies, foreign background, (ex-)girlfriends, 22

“jeder ist bemüht dass man sich mindestens einmal in der Woche sich trifft”.

23

“das ist ungewöhnlich, sonst habe ich diese, dieses Systema=dieses System nicht mit anderen Freunden”.

24

“dann müssen wir uns irgendwie auch uns was einfallen lassen und wir unternehmen vieles zusammen”.

50

A lonesome warrior and a helpful community: the cases

living in Hamburg, current difficult situation, being loners), as well as their self-initiated buddy system reaffirm Luis Alberto's and Marek's role for one another. Luis Alberto depicts Marek as very similar to himself, as his alter ego. They act as a mirror to one another, reconfirming their situations and stabilising their mutual roles, thus perpetuating their special friendship. 5.1.2.2

Monetary, technical and 24/7 friendships

When talking about various other relationships, Luis Alberto differentiates between them according to the kind of contact they have and to the content of the relationship. More precisely, he ascribes one or more specific functions to each relationship: “well, I know more or less yes what I then, so when I need something, which person I can turn to, and and or who turns to me.” 25 Luis Alberto states that he is able to sort his contacts according to what they offer him and what he can offer them, and this is what he does during the interview: he depicts each relationship as fulfilling a specific need. Talking about a friend of his, Liu Huan, he calls him “my friend for all technical problems” 26, which accredits broad technical skills to his friend, at the same time circumscribing him to his function as a solver of one kind of problems. Their relationship is mutual, as Luis Alberto then explains: “I have also often helped him, with bureaucratic problems, too, and hiiis situation in Germany.” 27 In exchange for his technical help, Luis Alberto helps Liu Huan to deal with issues arising from his being in Germany: with bureaucratic 25

“also ich weiß ungefähr ja (I: hm) was ich dann, also wenn ich was brauche zu welcher Person ich dann gehen kann, und und oder wer zu mir kommt.”

26

“mein Freund für alle Probleme der Technik”.

27

“Ich habe ihm auch öfters geholfen, auch mit seine bürokratische Problemen und seinee Situation in Deutschland”.

A lonesome warrior: Luis Alberto, a highly communicative loner 51 problems and more generally with his current situation in Germany, which may comprise various kinds of support. Later, Luis Alberto describes his help more in detail: filling out forms and answering questions about formal letters Liu Huan has received. He is Liu Huan's contact person for information concerning important matters. Although they sometimes also go out for a meal together 28, this friendship is mainly based on them helping each other with certain matters. These can be quite serious, e.g. a broken computer or papers regarding permission to stay. Their friendship is therefore more formal, very useful and fruitful for both of them. Compared to the relationship with his friend Liu Huan, that between Luis Alberto and his friend Jana is less straightforward. They do not meet often, but they know they are there for each other. Luis Alberto depicts her current situation as quite difficult and time-consuming, since she works a lot and her mother is seriously ill. They cannot meet, but he portrays himself as the person she can call late at night after work when she needs to be comforted because she is feeling sad: “sometimes she is quite sad and depressed and then we talk a bit over the phone during the night”. 29 Although theoretically they could both call each other in the nighttime, in this case she calls him for what he later calls “moral support” 30. Luis Alberto’ statement that he is the only person she can call in the middle of the night is also relevant: “at two o'clock then she cannot call anyone anymore, but she can call ME.” 31 Luis 28

“wir treffen uns mal zum Essen”

29

“manchmal ist sie ziemlich traurig und niedergeschlagen und dann telefonieren wir son bisschen in der Nacht”

30

“moralische Unterstützung”.

31

“um zwei Uhr, dann kann sie keinen mehr anrufen, aber MICH kann sie anrufen”.

52

A lonesome warrior and a helpful community: the cases

Alberto is the only sympathetic ear she can find for comfort when no one else is available any longer. It seems as if he is indispensable to her, although this is the only time she falls back upon his availability, since otherwise “she does not need any help as such” 32. By considering this support as not actually being “help”, Luis Alberto cements his assessment of her otherwise being “very SELFsufficient” 33 and not really needing him. Unlike the relationship with Liu Huan, this one is based not on an exchange of favours and mutual dependency, but on an implicit offer and readiness to listen to each other. Although the offer is reciprocal, Luis Alberto only mentions issues and reasons why she might phone him, not why he would want to talk to her. A similar situation of (seemingly) reciprocal emotional support is given with another “very close friend” 34 whom Luis Alberto introduces as being “quite lonely here, too” 35. He can relate to her loneliness, which is an important reason for his being available for their friendship. This state of hers leads to her being dependent on him, because of her lack of other friends: “she needs ME, well because she has FEw friends here, too, Aand I need her too” 36. Again, it is her situation which Luis Alberto depicts as one in which he is needed. It is primarily her loneliness that legitimates their tie, although he mentions in passing that he also needs her. Generally, Luis Alberto often uses the term “brauchen” (to need), when describing the situations in which his friends turn to him (or he turns to them). Need32

“sie brauch eigentlich keine Hilfe (lacht dabei) an sich”.

33

“sehr SELBSTgenügsam”.

34

“sehr gute Freundin”.

35

“DIEe auch ziemlich einsam hier ist”.

36

“sie braucht mICH, also weil sie auch WEnige Freunde hier hat Uund ich brauche sie auch”.

A lonesome warrior: Luis Alberto, a highly communicative loner 53 ing each other fosters the relationships, which then exist for very precise reasons and fulfil specific functions. Not only does Luis Alberto know what function his own relationships have, he can also give precise information about whom his contacts approach for help and when they meet without him being present. Two friends of his meet because one borrows money from the other or asks him for technical help. The fact that Luis Alberto facilitated this contact is important to him: he states this at various times in different wordings, and then also specifies that this relationship is something different: “yes but so these are of course MONetary relationships” 37. Luis Alberto differentiates these from other relationships because of their monetary aspect and does not call them friendships, but “relationships” only. His final statement about this relationship is that “it’s funny to borrow money from a friend's friend” 38. Summing up, the relationships described above are understood as existing for specific reasons – e.g. financial or technical ones – and therefore different from other relationships described. 5.1.2.3 “They become acquainted thanks to me”: relationships between the alters Apart from the monetary relationship between a couple of them, most of his friends remain solely his friends, and rarely meet without him. They do know each other, but do not mix alone, independently of him. Sporadically, a few times a month, they go out for a meal together or to events. Luis Alberto characterises these encounters as random: “we usually meet to go out for a meal or 37

“ja also das sind aber natürlich Geldbeziehungen”.

38

“dass man sich über Freundschaften auch Geld ausleiht ist ja auch witzig ne?”

54

A lonesome warrior and a helpful community: the cases

kind of when there are hmmm events somewhere or something like that yes (I: hm) concert or, but * to eat yes, well somewhere you go out to eat CHInese or MExican or something and then we simply meet (I: Ok) once or twice a month, or so, you know?” 39 The general vagueness of the times and places they meet is clearly indicated by the number of adverbs. The meetings take place spontaneously and are not organised or coordinated by anyone. They do not fulfil any explicit function in a one-to-one relationship. Instead, they may foster a common feeling and trigger new relationships (e.g. “monetary friendships”). They contrast with the one-to-one relationships, which have a definite frequency and content that Luis Alberto can clearly determine. These casual gatherings happen by chance whenever a convenient public event interests a few of them or whenever they feel like going out to eat together. Apart from a few of them having an international background, Luis Alberto also describes various fields or contexts that connect a couple of his friends: some work in the same institution, some study together and others go out together. Despite these similarities and overlapping contexts, his contacts do not mix. In this setting, Luis Alberto can or even has to act as a mediator who connects people. These occasional group encounters offer Luis Alberto's friends an opportunity to exchange information or to establish their own relationships, independent of that with Luis Alberto, but “of course they become acquainted thanks to me” 40. Luis Alberto is the link which connects them in the first place, but when they are acquainted they 39

“treffen wir uns meistens zum Essen oder irgendwie wenn es irgendwo hmm Events gibt oder irgendwie sowas ja (I: hm) Konzert oder, aber * zum Essen ja, also irgendwo so dass man irgendwie CHInesisch essen geht oder mexikAnisch und dann treffen wir uns einfach ab (I: Ok) und zu mal im Monat, oder so, ne?”

40

“die kommen natürlich über mich zu Bekanntschaft”.

A lonesome warrior: Luis Alberto, a highly communicative loner 55 could then also pursue their own aims, like two friends of his who have established what he calls a monetary relationship: “this, too, was possible because they know me […] because Marek trusts me.” 41 Here, Luis Alberto again points out that he is the mediator because he introduced them to each other and attributes the connection-fostering function to himself. This puts him in an important position in his own network, since he can then control who has access to what kind of information or support. On the other hand, he also has to continuously contact, connect and inform individuals and cannot rely on a whole interconnected group, which could provide him with a differently organised kind of support. 5.1.2.4 “I took care of her”: gendered relationships As examined above, the varied kinds of needs Luis Alberto mentions are fulfilled by specific alters. All in all, Luis Alberto talks more about female contacts than about male ones and when describing the relationships, he also differentiates between them according to their gender. There is a noticeable separation of roles in Luis Alberto's group of contacts. With his female friends he talks about “relationship problems” 42 , “relationships and art” 43 , or about “everyday problems and like practical pr=stuff” 44 . Together they “go to the theatre, to the cinema, to concerts” 45 and he helps one

41

“das war auch durch meine Bekanntschaft möglich […] dadurch dass Marek zu mir Vertrauen hat”.

42

“Beziehungsschwierigkeiten”.

43

“Beziehungen und Kunst”.

44

“Alltagsprobleme und so praktische Pr=Sachen”.

45

“ins Theater, Kino, Konzerte”.

56

A lonesome warrior and a helpful community: the cases

female friend with her shopping 46 . Meanwhile, with his male friends Luis Alberto discusses topics such as “life planning, pla=plans for the future, […] ideological problems” 47 . These profound topics are addressed by Luis Alberto and his male friends, only. Similarly, he discusses “problems of a technical nature” 48 with a male friend. This differentiation between topics shows that Luis Alberto allocates different competences to his male and female friends. The men are his confidants for issues concerning his life, important decisions and moral questions, while he consults his female friends (or vice versa) on emotional matters and they share more down to earth activities such as going shopping and organising things. Besides discussing different topics and engaging in different activities according to the gender of each friend, he also characterises himself differently in relationship to them: with women he tends to depict himself as the comforter, the man they can always count on. As discussed above, for one woman friend he is the only person she can call in the middle of the night after work. For another he is the friend who was there in difficult times: “At the time, Silke had divoorced her husband und this I took care of her a bit during that time when she was quite lonely.” 49 For a third friend he is the friend who is there for them, as there is nobody else around. He depicts himself as always willing to listen to his female friends, to comfort them and be there for them as their 24/7 help hotline. 46

“ich helfe ihr was ma=was ma zum Einkaufen gehen”

47

“Lebensplanung, Zu=Zukunftsplanung, […] weltanschauliche Problemen”.

48

“Problemen […] technischer Natur”.

49

“Silke hat sich damals von ihrem Mann getreennt und des habe ich sie ein bisschen begleitet in diese Zeit, als sie so ziemlich einsam war”.

A lonesome warrior: Luis Alberto, a highly communicative loner 57 In turn, he depicts the women as also willing to stand by him, but the situations in which he calls on their services are of a more practical nature. He asks one friend to help him with practical issues, e.g. financial and bureaucratic problems. 50 In other cases Luis Alberto again explains that his female friends are there for him, but he never actually talks about situations in which he has approached them nor does he mention which of his own issues he has discussed with them. With a few female friends he also talks about relationship issues. During the interview, Luis Alberto specifies that the connection to two of his various female alters is platonic, only. He describes one as being like a sister to him: “Silke is a very very good friend * she is like a sister, well like an older sister to me” 51. Luis Alberto first values the friendship as being particularly good. Then he takes it a step further and compares her to an older sister: she is someone who takes care of him as if he were part of her family, a younger sibling she guides and protects. Of another female friend, Luis Alberto says, “we have an intellectual connection” 52. To Luis Alberto, theirs is not a friendship like others, but one in which intellectual exchange prevails. On both occasions, Luis Alberto excludes the idea of a partnership or sexual relationship. Generally, he characterises himself as a sensitive man who is there for his female friends in particular at any time of day or night and helps them in times of need without any ulterior motives. With his male friends, the situation is different. These are the people who provide him with technical and financial help and to 50

“Belange des […] praktischen Lebens”

51

“Silke ist eine sehr sehr gute Freundin * sie ist so wie eine Schwester, also eine ältere Schwester für mich”.

52

“wir haben eine Verbindung geistiger Natur”.

58

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whom he can talk about various issues. Still, when it comes to serious or problematic topics, things become more complicated. The only friend Luis Alberto used to phone to talk about important matters (e.g. the future) lives abroad and their contact is now extremely sporadic and decreasing. Therefore, he can currently only talk to his one best male friend in Hamburg about difficult topics such as his “current situation” or university issues. Nevertheless, he does not do so explicitly, but “in a private, veiled manner”. 53 This private arrangement, which clearly suits them both, offers them the chance to talk to a trusted male friend about personal issues without exposing themselves too much. Luis Alberto does not want to talk about his problematic issues with his family, either. Instead, he prefers to discuss their troubles: “I tell them I'm doing this and that, and, but not so in much detail, I am more interested in, well how they are there well uhm * how my mother's health is and also financial problems they have there.” 54 During their phone calls, Luis Alberto, his mother and sister usually discuss the two women's situation. His sister's job as a teacher at university and his mother's health issues are central, whereas Luis Alberto prefers not to tell them much about his own activities and studies. He simply perfunctorily reports “everything is going fine” 55 and omits the details, avoiding unpleasant questions. His showing interest in their problems and current situation confirms his selfdescription so far: he is the one who listens to other people's complaints and supports them in difficult times, while he himself does 53

“wir sprechen das persönlich versteckt an”

54

“ich erzähle ich mache das und jenes, und, aber nicht so ausführlich, mi(r) interessiert mehr, also wies ihnen geht dort also ääh * wie es meine Mutter gesundheitlich geeht und also wirtschaftliche Problemen die sie dort haben”.

55

“alles läuft gut”.

A lonesome warrior: Luis Alberto, a highly communicative loner 59 not complain, although he may have difficulties. It is their hardship and not his that is the main topic of the relationship. The connection Luis Alberto has with his mother and sister differs from the ones he has with his friends because it is not one that is explicitly directed at solving any problems, but mainly at discussing them. The distance between them makes it harder for him to offer concrete support, therefore he lends a sympathetic ear. In summary, discussing his own personal, difficult issues generally is not something that Luis Alberto seems to do often, especially not with male contacts. Instead, Luis Alberto describes himself as a helper and supporter for his friends and acquaintances. He hosts them, helps them with bureaucratic paperwork, listens to them, goes out with them in times of need, checks on them if he knows they are lonely, lends them money or, if he himself cannot, he connects them to others who can. He paints a picture of himself as a person who provides others with what they need. He does ask for support and gets it, too, but describes the support he himself gives, could give or cannot give more intensely and in much more detail than that he receives. 5.1.2.5 “He does not like him”: hindrances and relationships Although he has various friends and acquaintances whom he sees quite often, Luis Alberto characterises many of his relationships as being somehow endangered, difficult or hampered. The hindrances fall into two main categories (time and distance), which sometimes overlap or contain other hindrances. When describing his relationship to a close woman friend, for example, Luis Alberto states that “the problem is that Julia is married and rarely has time.” 56 Her hus-

56

“Das Problem ist, dass Julia verheiratet ist und wenig Zeit hat.”

60

A lonesome warrior and a helpful community: the cases

band being quite jealous 57, his friend's marriage leads to them not being able to spend time together. She also has to work a lot 58, which leaves her with even less time. Therefore, they have to fall back upon other strategies to keep in touch without straining her marriage or her time schedule. The only solution seems to be mediated contact: “strangely enough, with Julia only contact via Skype is possible, although she lives in Hamburg.” 59 Although they live in the same city, which Luis Alberto explicitly mentions, they cannot meet or talk very often. It becomes clear that to Luis Alberto living in the same city should naturally mean face-to-face meetings. Having to make do with phone calls or chats, although they both live in Hamburg, is dissatisfying and strange. When talking about his close friend in Peru, on the other hand, it is evident that the distance and time difference complicate their keeping in touch. But here, too, there are other reasons for their being able to talk only once every six months: phone calls are expensive, so they can only talk once in a while: “we talk over the phone every six months but then it is always very short”. 60 This friend also has very little time because he is busy working: “he works a lot, too, and, difficult.” 61 Although he is a very good longtime friend of his, this contact is not as available as Luis Alberto would like him to be. To legitimate his still considering him a very good friend, Luis Alberto has to explain all the difficulties their friendship has overcome. 57

“ziemlich eifersüchtig”

58

“muss auch sehr viel arbeiten”

59

“mit Julia ist […] Kontakt nur über Skype möglich, ssss komischerweise [...] obwohl sie in Hamburg wohnt”.

60

“wir telefonieren einmal in halbes Jahr aber dann ist immer sehr kurz”

61

“er arbeitet auch viel und, schwierig”.

A lonesome warrior: Luis Alberto, a highly communicative loner 61 Luis Alberto repeatedly mentions that his friends have too little time for him, blaming their lack of time for his difficulty in seeing them more regularly. In one case, though, it is Luis Alberto himself who does not have time for a friend of his: “let's say I don't have much time for him” 62 . What is more, this friend is an introvert, which Luis Alberto also sees as an explanation for their not being in contact more often: “but he is qUIte uncommunicative […], very introverted and it is very difficult to come into contact with him.” 63 Lack of time is thus an excuse that Luis Alberto can accept or bring forward himself, depending on the relationship in question and the importance he attributes to it. With two of his particularly close friends, this excuse is not permissible. These friends make time for each other and work on opportunities to meet: “each of us makes efforts to meet at least once a week” 64. Moreover, time is an impediment to Luis Alberto's friendships because some of his contacts (international students) constantly come and go: “but these are people who come to Hamburg for a visit once in a while and then leave again” 65. These fleeting visits preserve the connection, while at the same time making it difficult to preserve the friendships as such. They influence the relationship to the point that Luis Alberto does not call them “friends”, but more generally “people”.

62

“ich habe wenig Zeit für ihn sagen wir so”.

63

“der ist aber zIEmlich unkommunikativ […], sehr introvertiert und es ist sehr schwer mit ihn in Kontakt zu kommen”.

64

“jeder ist bemüht dass man sich mindestens einmal in der Woche sich trifft”.

65

“das sind aber Menschen die ab und zu in Hamburg sind zu Besuch und dann wieder gehen”.

62

A lonesome warrior and a helpful community: the cases

Another reason why time and distance act as opponents to Luis Alberto's friendships is the fact that, in the long run, he might have to leave Hamburg. He is not yet sure where he wants to go when he graduates (as will be discussed later), but his family and friends in Peru want him to return there. Generally, time and distance are present in quite negative roles in Luis Alberto's account. They are his main antagonists when it comes to meeting or spending time with his acquaintances and having regular, deep discussions with them. The factors which unite to threaten or impede a smooth, trouble-free relationship are Luis Alberto's own availability, his friends' availability, jobs, his friends' contacts (e.g. husband), other people's character traits, technical problems and the time difference. Essentially, relationships are difficult and can only exist because Luis Alberto and his contacts have – at least temporarily – overcome the obstacles between them. This sometimes requires great effort, but Luis Alberto depicts himself, and some of the others, as willing to make an effort to overcome the hindrances. Apart from the difficulties in Luis Alberto's current relationships, he also introduces various examples of difficulties he and his friends have in establishing new relationships. In Luis Alberto's opinion, one friend of his is in a particularly difficult situation, since she practically does not have any (other) contacts at all. Luis Alberto blames this on the circumstances she is in: “The problem is she currently does not have a JOb * aand uhm and is not studying […] otherwise she is quite isolated but that's not her own fault because it is quite difficult in Hamburg.” 66 Various difficulties are listed here: her unemployment, not being a student and the fact that she lives in Hamburg. He sums these circumstances up as her not being able to 66

“das Problem ist, sie hat keine ARbeit zurzeit * uund äh und studiert nicht […] sonst ist sie ziemlich isoliert, aber das ist nicht ihre Schuld also selber, weil es ist ziemlich schwierig ist in Hamburg”.

A lonesome warrior: Luis Alberto, a highly communicative loner 63 make new acquaintances and being isolated. Further, the city itself is seen as a place which can easily lead to isolation, as will be discussed later. Apart from these various situational characteristics, according to Luis Alberto personal traits can also lead to people having difficulties in making friends. As already mentioned, he describes one friend of his as being introverted and a “loner” 67, which keeps him from making friends. Further, Luis Alberto states that it is generally difficult to make new friends because people already have their circle of acquaintances: “they [people] already have their circles and all their friendships and all their relationship networks * and uhm are uhm * well it's difficult to get a bit deeper into a friendship” 68. Here, it is other people's circles of acquaintances that Luis Alberto sees as preventing new friendships. When he describes them as already having “circles”, this alludes to them being enclosed in a group of friends which a new, additional person will find hard to enter. Luis Alberto describes these circles and networks as being quite closed. It is therefore not easy to make friends with someone who is in one of these circles, and hard for such friendships to become “deeper”. Apart from the trouble Luis Alberto himself has in maintaining his friendships and which others have in finding friends, he also mentions that some of his friends' relationships cannot or do not work, either. One friend simply does not like the other: “here there is also

67

“Einzelgänger”.

68

“die [Leute] haben schon ihre eigene Kreise und ihre ganze Freundschaften und ihre ganze Beziehungsnetze * und äh sind ähm * also es ist schwierig sich da ein bisschen tiefer in eine Freundschaft reinzukommen”.

64

A lonesome warrior and a helpful community: the cases

well more antagonistic well h=he doesn't like him” 69 . The two people in question, both friends of Luis Alberto's, know each other but do not like each other. This has consequences for Luis Alberto, too, e.g. it excludes the possibility of them meeting at the same time or going out together. It may even imply that Luis Alberto has to take care not to give preference to one, to avoid the other being offended. Their antagonism is therefore not beneficial to his relationships to either of them. Another situation also shows that he is influenced by discord: “she […] used to call my mother like a bit, (I: hm) uhm my mother blocked it, didn't want to.” 70 In this case the hostility is on one side, his mother's side, only. She is in a position to suppress the friend's (Anna’s) undesired calls, thus undermining Anna’s attempts at reestablishing a connection and building a triangle between Luis Alberto, his mother and herself. Because this triangle does not exist any longer and has been forcedly disrupted, Luis Alberto again must behave accordingly towards both his mother and Anna. Although the conflicts have an influence on him, in both these cases Luis Alberto does not explain his own involvement in them. As he does not specify how the conflicts between his contacts are related to him, they seem to have no bearing on him. Nevertheless, the contacts are mainly his friends, therefore it is him who has to adapt his relationship in consequence of the others' enmity. 5.1.2.6

“Loneliness threatens everyone”

Although Luis Alberto characterises himself as the one connecting, comforting, helping and listening to others, he also stresses the 69

“Hier gibts auch also mehr antagonistisch also e=er mag den nicht”.

70

“die [...] hat früher mit meine Mutter son bisschen telefoniert, (I: hm) ahm meine Mutter hat das blockiert, wollte nicht.”

A lonesome warrior: Luis Alberto, a highly communicative loner 65 point that he puts a lot of effort, time and energy into his relationships, seemingly more than others. Often, they do not contact him if they need something; instead, he anticipates their needs, as with his friend Violeta: “I know that if I don't call her she probably won't have talked to anyone else that day.” 71 Violeta is portrayed as a passive person, whom he calls to relieve her of her isolation. His knowledge that he is sometimes the only person she talks to reinforces his conviction that it is important, even necessary, for him to call her. The same applies to his mother: “that's why I must call my mother once or twice a week, at least, so she doesn't feel so lonely” 72. Here, too, it is the other person's need that triggers his activity. Luis Alberto perceives this activity as a duty, an obligation that arises from his supposition of the other person's expectations. In general, it is Luis Alberto who stays in touch with his friends. They do not often seem to take the initiative, which leads to him having to invest more to keep up the relationship. The topic introduced above, loneliness, is one that Luis Alberto addresses more than once because it influences various relationships. His friend Violeta is the first person that Luis Alberto describes as lonely. While talking about where to place her on the map, Luis Alberto starts a lengthy explanation about why it is so difficult to position her: “then there's uhm * yes and Violeta of course one should, well it's difficult with Violeta” 73. The expression “one should” shows that Luis Alberto is not sure what to say about her 71

“ich weiß wenn ich sie nicht anrufe hat sie vielleicht an dem Tag mit keine andere sonst gesprochen”.

72

“deswegen muss ich auch meine Mutter mindestens ein oder zweimal pro Woche anrufen, damit sie sich nicht so einsam fühlt”.

73

“dann kommt ähm * ja und Violeta natürlich müsste man, also das ist schwIErig mit Violeta”.

66

A lonesome warrior and a helpful community: the cases

importance to him. If he were strict in applying his own abovementioned criteria to define importance (frequency and duration), she might have to be positioned closer, since they do meet often: “this is kind of a person I see often” 74. Nevertheless, although the criterion of frequency is fulfilled, their situation is not a definitive one: “Uhm this is like a transition” 75. It being a transition posits a more definitive state, which has not yet been attained. Luis Alberto explains the transitory character of their friendship by connecting it to a temporal factor: “because I know that it is actually a temporary thing, until she has well really found someone who is well impOrtant for hEr, well like a=a=a a PArtner uh or like a person she really nEEds and I am not that person.” 76 This relationship is a temporary solution. Violeta needs someone, but Luis Alberto deems himself not really to be the right person. At the moment, they are necessary to each other, but not indispensable or irreplaceable. Nevertheless, until she finds the person she actually needs, they have to be there for and support each other. This interim situation arises from a mutual obligation caused by the circumstances, the lack of friends on her side and the loneliness on both sides: “she needs me well because she has few friends here, too, Aand I need her too well because sometimes * you’re LONEly and stuff.” 77 Since Luis Alberto and Violeta's needs and what they can offer each other coincide, they are currently available for one another. He embodies the 74

“das ist ein bisschen ein Mensch das ich auch öfters seh”.

75

“Ähh des ist so ein Übergang”.

76

“weil ich weiß, dass es eigentlich eine vorübergehende Sache ist, bis sie irgendjemand also wirklich gefunden hat, der für sIE, also wIchtig ist, also son=son=son son PArtner äh oder so eine Person, die sie wirklich brAUcht und das bin ich nicht”.

77

“sie braucht mich, also weil sie auch wenige Freunde hier hat Uund ich brauche sie auch, also weil manchmal * man auch EINsam ist und so”.

A lonesome warrior: Luis Alberto, a highly communicative loner 67 friends she lacks and the partner she has not yet found, while she makes him feel less lonely. Luis Alberto does not expressly state that he himself is lonely, but hints at it by using the unspecified subject “you”. All in all, as his relationship to Violeta is transitory and exchangeable, Luis Alberto depicts as not as important as a definitive one might be. This leads to him positioning her farther away from himself on the map: “I would place her like a bit in=a second row here” 78. Although they meet quite often, reciprocally support each other and even need each other, his belief that he is not the right person for her in the long run leads to her also being less important to him. Apart from Violeta, Luis Alberto also describes his mother as lonely and her situation as problematic: “she is currently a bit ill and lo// and lives alone in a flat and that's why I have to call her, too, at least once or twice a week, so that she doesn’t feel so lonely.” 79 His mother is not only lonely but also ill, which increases the need for him to intervene by calling her. These calls are expressly intended to relieve her loneliness, which stems from her being ill and also her living alone. His calling once or twice a week is his contribution to keeping her company. Again, Luis Alberto depicts himself as the one who helps out without the other person having to ask. He has a clear notion of what his mother's needs are and fulfils them as best as he can from his current position and situation. Having described his friend’s and his mother's loneliness, Luis Alberto then states “So loneliness threatens everyone, somehow (breathes in through his teeth, laughs) a continuous threat to 78

“ich würde sie son bisschen in=ne zweite Reihe hier stellen”.

79

“sie=ist ein bisschen krank zurzeit und ei// und wohnt alleine in eine Wohnung und deswegen muss ich auch meine Mutter mindestens ein oder zweimal pro Woche anrufen, damit sie sich nicht so einsam fühlt.“

68

A lonesome warrior and a helpful community: the cases

everyone, to me too” 80. This conclusion is a definite one. Although he has explained the various efforts he makes to meet and keep in touch with a number of people and although he has characterised himself as someone who is always available to help and who cares for others, Luis Alberto comes to the conclusion that loneliness prevails nonetheless. It not only threatens the people he cares for in his effort to prevent it, but it is also present in his own life. He is aware that it is always him who makes an effort to keep in touch with others, while they only contact him if they need something. All in all, he is in an isolated position and, to be in touch with others, it is him who has to take action. The topic of loneliness is closely linked to the city Luis Alberto and his friends are currently living in: Hamburg is often mentioned in connection with difficulties in establishing new contacts and making friends. More precisely, two friends are described as not having many friends in Hamburg, while another friend's loneliness is blamed on her not knowing many people in the city and on the general difficulty in making friends there (see previous analyses). What is more, Hamburg being an attractive city for tourists and people who have already lived there, it is a place Luis Alberto's former friends and acquaintances come (back to) relatively frequently: “but these are people who come to Hamburg for a visit once in a while and then leave again” 81. These people's visits give him the chance to host them and to meet up with them (again). Nevertheless, they remain guests or inconstant visitors, whereas he stays in Hamburg. Their coming and leaving reinforces the transient character of the relationships forged there and of life there. 80

“Also Einsamkeit bedroht alle Menschen irgendwie (durch Zähne einatmen, lacht) 'ne ständige Bedrohung für alle, für mich auch”.

81

“das sind aber Menschen die ab und zu in Hamburg sind zu Besuch und dann wieder gehen”.

A lonesome warrior: Luis Alberto, a highly communicative loner 69 Conversely, it also fuels his own perception of himself as staying in Hamburg, of it increasingly becoming the city he has lived in for a long time, while others come and go. Being an immigrant or a newcomer in Hamburg seems to make it even harder to find friends for Luis Alberto: “it is quite difficult in Hamburg [...] * for the people who uhm are not from Hamburg because Hamburgers also uhm for these people who are here as immigrants it's even more difficult.” 82 Meeting people in Hamburg is not easy in itself, but there are two groups of people who, according to Luis Alberto, are even more disadvantaged than others: people who are not from Hamburg and immigrants. This is a circumstance which Luis Alberto seems to have experienced or observed himself: “it also happens not only to people whoo now come from other countries, but even Germans who for example come to Hamburg from another federal state […] also sometimes uhm uh take years to build a friendship” 83. Here, Luis Alberto explains immigrants' difficulties in making friends by comparing their situation to that of Germans who have migrated within the country to the capital. By doing so, he justifies the immigrants' experience, relieves them of the responsibility for their difficulties and states that it is not within their power to speed up the process of socialising. Another observation of Luis Alberto's is “that they are often more likely to come into contact and build friendships with people from

82

“es ist ziemlich schwierig ist in Hamburg […] * für die Menschen, die äh nicht aus Hamburg sind, weil die Hamburger auch äh für die Leute, die jetzt als Immigranten hier sind ist es noch schwieriger”.

83

“das passiert auch nicht nur Menschen diee jetzt aus anderen Ländern kommen, sondern selbst Deutsche die zum Beispiel aus ein anderen ähm Bundesland nach Hamburg kommen […] auch Jahre lang zum Teil ähm äh brauchen eine Freundschaft aufzubauen”.

70

A lonesome warrior and a helpful community: the cases

abroad, too” 84. It is not quite clear who is meant here, but it can be assumed that both groups are implied, since Luis Alberto equates them in the same statement. According to Luis Alberto, the difficulty in meeting people leads to people from abroad and Germans who move to Hamburg making friends with one another more easily rather than with other groups of people. This observation justifies the composition of his own group of friends, since Luis Alberto has a few German friends and a few friends from abroad. The group of people it is the most unusual to make friends with in Hamburg seems to be Hamburgers themselves: “and EVen Hamburgers are thin on the ground” 85. What sounds irrational is a further example for the situation Luis Alberto feels in: although he has been living in Hamburg for almost a decade, he has barely met and befriended any Hamburgers. Characterising Hamburgers as a rare species further emphasises the separation between “newcomers” from in and outside Germany and Hamburgers. It also reinforces Luis Alberto's image as a non-Hamburger and his belonging to the group of non-Hamburgers, which comprises all the immigrants. 5.1.2.7 “University is a [connecting/dividing] social space” As explained above, it seems to be extremely difficult to befriend Hamburgers. Luis Alberto describes the situation as if they were so rare that they cannot be found at university either: “even at university, as they are a minority because here universities like Humboldt or Freie Universität are soooo coveted by looots of different uuhm people throughout Germany and throughout Europe so then you 84

“dass sie auch eher mit ausländische Menschen in Kontakt kommen und Freundschaften aufbauen können”.

85

“und sELbst HAmburger findet man auch selten”.

A lonesome warrior: Luis Alberto, a highly communicative loner 71 even hardly see people actually from Hamburg.” 86 One might assume that finding Hamburgers at university would be easier than meeting them elsewhere. However, Luis Alberto refutes this supposition by arguing that the universities in Hamburg are so prestigious that people from all over Germany and Europe now study there and outnumber the Hamburgers by far. Not only is the city of Hamburg attractive to foreigners and other Germans, as stated earlier, but its universities are, too. These people's presence at university diminishes everyone's chance of meeting Hamburgers: “And then you are also less in contact with them. That means you are always constantly among foreigners or among even * people who come from other federal states and from other relationship networks.” 87 The outcome of Hamburg's and its universities' popularity is, as Luis Alberto stated earlier, that people stick with their kind and cannot mingle with Hamburgers. He does not explicitly condemn this situation, but does seem to regret it. Although Luis Alberto actually has no opportunity to get to know Hamburgers there, he does acknowledge that university is a place where people generally get to know each other, by spending time there together: “we meet frequently simply because thee u=the university is well a social space and for example the canteen uhm you

86

“selbst in der Universität, weil die sind auch in der Minderzahl, dadurch dass hier sowas wie eine Universität wie die Humboldt oder die Freie Universität soooo begehrt ist von viieele verschiedenen ähhm Menschen in ganz Deutschland und in ganz Europa, dann sIEht man auch selbst die eigene Hamburger auch kaum.”

87

“Und dann hast du auch weniger Kontakt mit den'. Das heißt du bist immer ständig unter Ausländern oder unter selbst * Leute die aus anderen Bundesländer und aus anderen Beziehungsnetzen kommen.”

72

A lonesome warrior and a helpful community: the cases

meet to eat and there then or like have a cup of coffee” 88. Here, both the places and the activities have a connecting function: the university itself is labelled as a space in which social interaction automatically takes place. People need not even arrange meetings; they simply go there and the meetings happen. Luis Alberto introduces the topic of the university in various contexts and with various connotations. It is at the same time a connecting environment and topic, but also a dividing agent. Closely connected to the university, the canteen is a special place. It acts as a space where specific people (i.e. students) jointly engage in activities which are not necessarily strictly related to studying but which are inherent to student life and to these places: eating in the canteen and having a cup of coffee together between classes. The activities link the students both to the institution of the university and to each other: “I know where he for example uuhm where he is nearly every day, […] I know he goes to the canteen like around half past two always, then he is there” 89. The canteen being a public place, anyone can go there to eat. Further, the regularity with which some people frequent it ensures that people can meet without having to make an appointment. Luis Alberto explains that his friend habitually goes there at a certain time of day. He knows about this and can then decide whether he wants to join him or not. These meetings are not arranged and are therefore noncommittal. They can take place, but do not have to, which gives them a more casual character.

88

“wir treffen uns des öfteren einfach dadurch, dass diee U=die Universität so ein sozialer Raum ist und zum Beispiel die Mensa äh man sich zum Essen trifft und da dann oder so n Kaffee äh trinkt”.

89

“ich weiß wo er zum Beispiel ääh wo er fast jeden Tag ist, […] ich weiß er geht in die Mensa so um halb drei immer, dann ist er da”.

A lonesome warrior: Luis Alberto, a highly communicative loner 73 Another public university-related environment mentioned is the library, in which people again meet by chance: “you see him in the library, you see him at the disco, you see him there * uhm in the canteen and then everywhere and then eventually * you inevitably get into conversation with him” 90. Meeting someone in the library does not necessarily bring people together, especially since it is a place in which silence reigns, and which is not the best place to socialise. But it is a place in which people may start noticing, “seeing” others and if they then see each other again in places where they are allowed to talk and where socialising and having fun together is the main aim, e.g. at the disco, then the first contact established at the library can be strengthened. Finally, meeting again at the canteen, where communication and discussion is easier still, the contact can be consolidated. University is not just a place where individuals meet, but also one in which other constellations can be established, e.g. friends of friends meet: “these two people they know each other thanks to me, too, but yes they they have a certain communication, uum, * yes that may be because they are at university perhaps, right?” 91. Going to university is mentioned as a generally connecting activity. Being there automatically leads to a certain degree of connection. It is not just that people meet again and again who know one another in person or by sight: it is also a place where people make new acquaintances through their friends. Once introduced by a friend, it is easy for them to strike up a conversation again without the friend 90

“den siehst du dann in der Bibliothek, den siehst du dann in der Disco, den siehst du da * äh in der Mensa und dann überall und dann irgendwann * kommt man zwangsläufig ins Gespräch”.

91

“diese zwei Personen die kennen sich auch über mich, aber ja die die haben gewisse Kommunikation, ääh, * ja das kommt dadurch dass sie vielleicht in der Uni sind ne?”

74

A lonesome warrior and a helpful community: the cases

as an intermediary, because the context permits this interaction. Having introduced two friends of his to each other, Luis Alberto then notices they also talk to each other without him, because they are both at university. Again, the place they share and their both being students facilitates the connection between people and offers common ground; a reason to keep in touch. The same thing occurs with another friend of Luis Alberto's, “because he also takes courses at university from time to time” 92. This person meets other friends of Luis Alberto's because they are all studying together and sometimes attend the same classes. The general commonality of being students at the same faculty is not necessarily enough for people to meet and connect, but attending the same classes and having a friend in common increases the probability. Here, again it is the broader university context that provides a common basis for contact and the more specific context of classes which foster further communication. As shown above, in various cases, university is the environment that initiates and permits relationships. Nevertheless, it is seldom a main constitutive topic in Luis Alberto's friendships. Although he often labels his acquaintances formally as “fellow students” and their shared interest in the subject they are studying may lead to or reinforce their acquaintance, “university” or his studies are hardly ever a topic of discussion. In general, they are never mentioned in Luis Alberto's accounts of what he discusses with his contacts. Only when explicitly asked when university matters as a topic of conversation, he lists his three fellow students, but does not expound on its relevance. In Luis Alberto's relationship with his mother and sister, it becomes clear that the topic is not one he wishes to discuss either. He prefers 92

“weil er auch dann ab und zu Kurse macht in der Universität”.

A lonesome warrior: Luis Alberto, a highly communicative loner 75 to ask them how they are and enquire about his mother's health. About his studies, he says: “I scarcely talk about that with my mother, nor with my sister, […] then I barely say, uhm I have taken an exam and everything is OK, well yes, I don't talk much about my studies.” 93 In the relationship between Luis Alberto, his sister and their mother, it is clear that Luis Alberto's studies are of marginal importance, if anything. Luis Alberto limits his reports to vaguely and succinctly mentioning what he is doing. These seem to be mandatory summaries and what a parent might expect of her son's career as a student. Luis Alberto only reports on what he has achieved and the duties he has fulfilled and recapitulates it for them, stating that all is well, omitting any difficulties he may be experiencing. With his sister, it is again her situation which determines the topic of conversation: “with my sister I talk more about her situation as a teacher at university, like everything she then, I generally talk very little about myself.” 94 There is no mention of what Luis Alberto may have to recount. Although she may understand him since they have a common academic environment, his own situation at university does not seem to be a topic. Again, their conversation focuses on her concerns, not on his. The discussion with both his relatives is an update about their situation. While Luis Alberto seems to actively express interest in what is happening to his mother and sister, he does not report any interest on their part, but does not mention missing it, either. He is seemingly content

93

“darüber spreche ich mit meiner Mutter kaum, oder mit meiner Schwester, […] dann erzähl ich kaum, eh ich hab ne Prüfung gemacht und alles läuft gut, also ja, ich erzähle nicht so viel übers Studium”.

94

“mit meine Schwester sprech ich mehr über ihre Situation in der Universität als Lehrerin, so alles was sie dann, ich spreche in Allgemeinen wenig über mich”.

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with not having to talk about his studies in these relationships or in others. The latter becomes clear when Luis Alberto elaborately explains that he prefers to generally keep the topic to himself: “Yes let's say that about university and so on, that uhm is more a bit more like that it's that I keep it to myself, and I discuss it a bit with these two [important male contacts in Hamburg] at the most, or with Julia, I try to get my stuff done and then they do, too and that remains a bit like private a bit you know? Like.” 95 Luis Alberto will only talk about his studies with a few fellow students at best, but even with them very rarely. He prefers trying to find his way alone and states that his friends do, too. He therefore sees the topic as belonging to his private life and lets only two or three of his closer friends in on what is going on in his studies. He then also emphasises that it is his own priorities that set the agenda: “I prefer to discuss other problems rather than my studies […] it's my decision not to talk about it often or not so much.” 96 This mentioning of his studies as a problem may explain why Luis Alberto cannot and does not want to talk about the subject with anyone: he may not want to burden others with it. It is a problem he wants to tackle and solve alone. Nevertheless, he does talk about it “secretly”, especially with the two male friends mentioned earlier: 95

“Ja sag mal so über die Universität und so das ähm ist mehr so bisschen mehr so das ist dass ich das für mich behalte, und dann höchstens mit den beiden hier [wichtige männliche Kontakte in Hamburg] bisschen abspreche oder mit Julia, [...] ich versuch meine Sachen zu machen und dann sie auch, und das bleibt son bisschen bisschen wie Privatsphäre son bisschen ne? So.”

96

“ich bevorzuge mehr über andere Probleme zu reden als über das Studium [...] das liegt an mir dass ich darüber nicht oft reden möchte oder nicht so viel reden möchte.”

A lonesome warrior: Luis Alberto, a highly communicative loner 77 “But we do anyway with Marek and also and Oliver, we talk about it in a private, veiled manner: what are you doing now and why have you been doing it for so long and so on you know?” 97 There is a certain discomfort and secrecy surrounding this problematic topic. Luis Alberto describes a situation in which his friends also have problems with it, but do not want to or cannot discuss it openly either. The solution they have implicitly agreed upon is to address the topic indirectly by asking questions about the others' plans and approach to their studies. The answers they receive may then provide stimuli and solutions for their own problems. Thus, nobody needs admit openly that they are worried, while still being given a chance to seek and obtain advice. Studying is therefore a topic which is actively kept in the background, which can still connect people or has done so in the past, but is currently too negatively connoted to be used and denoted openly as a connecting agent. To people who are unfamiliar with the topic (relatives), it is mentioned only vaguely, marginally and positively in order not to arouse further questioning or worries. With other contacts that are in a comparable situation, it may be mentioned discreetly and indirectly, in order not to disrupt a delicately balanced alliance in which the problematic topic is present, but in which other topics form the foremost link. 5.1.2.8 Working and jobs In contrast to his studies, his jobs are a topic which Luis Alberto frequently and openly discusses. Through various jobs he has done to earn a living, he has met a few people who are now very 97

“Aber das machen wir trotzdem mit Marek und also und Oliver, wir sprechen das persönlich versteckt an, was machst du da jetzt und wieso machst du das jetzt so lange und so weiter ne?”

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important to him: “where I used to work […] there was a kind of boss and mhhhmhh and then we got along really well and then we also like met after work, too and so on” 98 . The working environment gave him and this person common ground and a common experience, starting from which they built up their friendship, which has lasted to date. The same situation has come about with two other friends. Luis Alberto states about one of them: “another thing that connects us with Marek is that we also in the, the same well have the same JOb, too” 99. Having the same job connects the two men in addition to various other activities, acquaintances and features they also share. They might not necessarily work together contemporaneously, but they work in the same place, which provides conversation topics, creates a common basis of understanding and increases the similarity in their situation in life even further. On the other hand, employment can also diminish the intensity of relationships: friends of his who work, such as Julia, Katharina or Fernando, automatically have less time for him, as discussed previously. Moreover, if a foreigner or an international student does not have a job, like his friend Violeta, they are excluded from various opportunities to get in touch with new people and especially with non-foreigners, as working is the best way to make new acquaintances, Luis Alberto explains. 5.1.2.9 “It is all uncertain” and the missing true love: the future Finally, a topic that gains in importance towards the end of the account is the question of where Luis Alberto wants to live in the 98

“wo ich früher gearbeitet habe [...] war eine Art Chefin und mhhhmhh und dann ham wir uns sehr gut verstanden und ham wir auch so nach der Arbeit uns weiter so getroffen”.

99

“mit Marek verbindet uns auch noch, dass wir auch in das, das gleiche also die gleiche ARbeit haben”.

A lonesome warrior: Luis Alberto, a highly communicative loner 79 future. At the moment he has not decided yet, but he discusses the topic with various people: “it is all uncertain yes, we discuss this hotly in our various circles” 100. The decision of whether to stay in Germany, to leave or to go back to his country of origin troubles not only him but also all of his contacts. It is therefore something everyone wants to have a say in, in all the different contexts in his life. Having to take this decision puts pressure on him. His family wants him to go back: “with my family it's clear that they absolutely want me to go back, that that is why I don't discuss it” 101. His relatives' decision is firm: they have made up their minds that he should go back to Peru. He knows that they will not change their mind; therefore, he does not even want to discuss the matter with them. Some contacts in Hamburg, on the other hand, would like him to stay: “for Silke it's clear I should stay here” 102. His family, Silke and other friends are convinced they know what he should do. It is clear to them, although it is not clear to him. This puts him in a difficult position: “so that the forces are a bit contrary here” 103. Luis Alberto feels the pull from both sides. A few friends seem to understand the difficulty Luis Alberto has in deciding and try to lessen the tension, or at least not to increase it, by suggesting alternative solutions: “You know Marek says, well hee tends towards me also going to Peru... He sometimes says he would

100

“das ist alles offen noch ja, darüber diskutieren wir ganz heiß in den verschiedenen Kreisen”.

101

“mit meiner Familie ist klar dass sie unbedingt wollen dass ich zurückkomme, das deswegen diskutier ich das nicht”.

102

“für Silke ist klar dass ich hier bleiben sollte”.

103

“so dass die Kräfte hier so bisschen in Clinch also so”.

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come to Peru himself” 104. Marek, who lives in Hamburg and is one of Luis Alberto's very best friends, tries to break the clinch by sometimes offering to go to Peru with him, which would keep their friendship intact. Marek is doing what he personally can to alleviate the burden of the decision. He may not necessarily be serious about the offer, but it seems to be intended to help Luis Alberto make his own decision by expressing solidarity and a wish to maintain their friendship. Others do the same: “And the others say I'll support you where you are, yes, wherever you are I will support you, or I will be there.” 105 This statement shows another attempt by his friends to let him take his decision without increasing the pressure through their own expectations and wishes. By reassuring him that they will stick with him, wherever he may be, they try to influence his decision as little as possible. Their promising they will be there for him is a way of showing that their current connection need not be interrupted by any decision he may take. Since he does not have a preference and some of his relationships push and pull him in different directions, Luis Alberto introduces an imaginary, superordinate decision maker: love. He states: “that one trUE love seems to be missing, like wherever it was, if it was here in Peru or here in Germany, so that the problem would be solved in one diRECtion right? (laughs)” 106. In this scenario, he would find a partner, which would make it easier to take a final decision. The partner's whereabouts would decide for him and automatically solve 104

“Marek meint ja, also eer tendiert dafür dass ich auch nach Peru.. Er wurde selbst auch mit nach Peru kommen sagt er manchmal”.

105

“Und die anderen sagen ich unterstütze dich wo du bist, ja, egal wo du bist unterstütz ich dich, oder ich bin da.”

106

“Es fehlt […] irgendwie schon die eine RIchtige Liebe, also egal wo, wäre es hier in Peru oder hier in Deutschland, damit das Problem vielleicht in eine RICHtung gelöst wird ne? (LACHT)”.

A lonesome warrior: Luis Alberto, a highly communicative loner 81 the problem. A geographically settled love would determine his future: “we are doing the right thing here, then then it the direction would be decided, like that person is probably what I need right?” 107. With a partner at his side, Luis Alberto would do “the right thing” and the location would be set. Right now, without a “true love”, Luis Alberto does not feel in a position to make the decision of where he wants to live. 5.1.3 Combination of the map and the narrative The analysis of the map and of the narrative went hand in hand: topics and questions arising from the analysis of the map led me to choose specific sections of the account in which those topics were addressed or in which I assumed we might find hints to answer the questions. In turn, topics arising from the analysis of the narrative led me to turn back to the map or analyse the next maps with those topics in mind and look at specific constellations of alters or at certain kinds of relationships in particular. This spiralling process cannot be reproduced in its complexity and totality here, but the link between the analysis of the map and of the narrative can be exemplified by a few pertinent examples. The analysis of the map created by Luis Alberto raised the question of why it was separated into two clusters and whether the two clusters comprised people who were separated, e.g. geographically. The narrative supports this assumption: the people in the smaller cluster can be identified as Luis Alberto’s family and his very good or even best friend. The people in the larger cluster are friends, classmates, colleagues and acquaintances. The narrative furthermore suggests that the separation is linked to geographical factors, 107

“wir machen hier was Richtiges, dann dann entscheidet sich das auch bisschen die Richtung, also diese Person fehlt wahrscheinlich ja?”

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to the distance and time difference between Luis Alberto’s current location and those of his family and best friends. This means the dividing line is drawn between the people in his country or city of origin and the people located where he is currently living, thus dividing the relationships into two groups: people in Peru and people in Hamburg. The narrative therefore supports the finding that there are two clearly separate clusters in the map which have different characteristics. One person in particular constitutes a link between the two geographical sections on the map: an important contact on the left side of the map whom Luis Alberto classifies as a very good friend from Peru. He calls her when he wants to be in touch with someone from Peru, to catch up on the atmosphere there: “[…] this other Anna is a very good friend of mine from PerU that I also call from time to time. Like when I want to be in touch with someone from Peru in order to catch up on the atmosphere a bit, on what’s going on.” 108 The friend is a representative of the Peru feeling that Luis Alberto wants to connect to from time to time. Their relationship is more of a functional one, which Luis Alberto activates when he finds it necessary; when he feels the urge to do so. His counterpart is more passive than him: it is a friend he can contact when he wants to be in touch with someone in Peru, but she does not contact him. The contact could actually be anyone currently in Peru: Luis Alberto does not mention any interest in her life or in her personal wellbeing, nor does he mention her being interested in his either. Nevertheless, this does not lessen the status of the friendship, and Luis Alberto considers her a very good friend of his. Her importance 108

“[…] diese andere Anna ist eine sehr gute Freundin von mir aus PerU, die ich dann öfters auch anrufe. Also wenn ich mit jemand aus Peru in Kontakt sein möchte, also um so ein bisschen die Stimmung zu mitzukriegen* was so ist.”

A lonesome warrior: Luis Alberto, a highly communicative loner 83 for Luis Alberto is legitimated by the facts that he calls her often, that he can contact her whenever he feels like it, and that she is his principal channel to the Peruvian atmosphere. Through her, he can connect to that atmosphere; she is his main and perhaps only link to it. She is able to convey the Peruvian atmosphere, an unspecified atmosphere described here as common to the country in general. She is capable of putting it into words, of explaining it on the phone and therefore of letting him be part of and feel it, too, although he is currently far away. Its essence remains vague; it may include anything his friend might bring up and is therefore restricted to her personal perspective. The relativisation “ein bisschen” (a bit) shows that Luis Alberto is aware that he cannot really experience the complete atmosphere of the whole country by talking to just one person on the phone from time to time. “Ein bisschen” may also be the expression of an unfulfilled wish to be let in on much more about the atmosphere to get a clearer picture of what is going on there. Still, this contact is very important because she functions as a trustworthy representative of the Peruvian atmosphere and as a link between Peru and Luis Alberto in his current location. She is a link between the left and right sides of the network map, which are otherwise separated. On the network map, this friend in Peru is in the second circle, not the first (even though in the narrative she is called “a very good friend”). This leads to the question of whether there might be a discrepancy between the map and the narrative, since other “very good friends” are in the first circle, or whether other criteria apply here (and if so, which). As mentioned, the contact is his main informant and he is allowed to call her whenever he feels like an update on the current Peruvian atmosphere. This qualifies her as the ideal source and as a very important contact, leading him to call her a “very good friend”. To understand why she is in the second

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circle, though, it is necessary to regard this relationship in reference to the first three Peruvian contacts in the first circle. These are Luis Alberto's mother, his sister and his best friend. They are all people whom Luis Alberto contacts to talk about personal and private things. With his mother and sister, Luis Alberto talks about his mother's state of health and her financial concerns. Sometimes, though rarely and vaguely, he talks about himself and his life “here”. With his sister, he also talks about his mother's situation, and about her job. He calls his mother and sister once or twice a week. With the third “very important” contact in the inner circle, Luis Alberto would like to talk about very personal matters such as “life planning” and “the future”, since it is one of his best friends and they have known each other for a very long time. However, this is not possible, since his friend is very busy and they only talk to each other briefly twice a year. This makes it clear why Luis Alberto differentiates between those contacts that he shares and discusses private matters with and the friend through whom he keeps in touch with the Peruvian atmosphere. The first group consists of the people who are “very important” for his personal discussion and reflection, the second is “very important” for his feeling of staying connected to Peru. Although it is clearly relevant for other relationships in the other part of the map, as discussed previously, the frequency of contact is not as important and does not influence the position of the contacts in this part of the map. By looking into the differences between the relationships in Hamburg and those in Peru, the separation found between them in the map can be further elaborated. Luis Alberto talks about people in Hamburg and in Peru and about characteristics that distinguish them. Luis Alberto has fewer contacts in Peru; they are sporadic and diminishing in frequency and intensity. As mentioned above, there are no connections between them, and two of them (a friend of his

A lonesome warrior: Luis Alberto, a highly communicative loner 85 and his mother) have had a conflict, shown by the crossed-out arrow and described in the narrative. Although these are very important people, their importance is questioned and put to the test by the main hindrance to all Luis Alberto's transoceanic relationships: a general difficulty in communicating frequently, freely and openly about everything. While his contacts in Peru are not connected to one another at all, his friends and acquaintances in Hamburg do not communicate much, either. Although the map suggests that they are well connected, these are relationships that are maintained via Luis Alberto. Some also support each other independently of him and meet in his absence, but these are exceptions. Mainly, it is him who maintains contact to each person in his network individually. He invests quite a lot of time and resources in the relationships, something the others do not do quite as much. He depicts himself as someone who is reliable and available, someone that others, especially his female friends, can contact when in need, and even as someone who proactively contacts people he supposes might need him. The people he himself would rather approach to talk about serious and important topics are currently far away, on the other side of the map – and of the ocean. He therefore portrays himself as currently lonely, but still resourceful and active among other lonely and needy people, whom he stands by. The map analysis also sparked the assumption that Luis Alberto’s contacts had changed over time. In the narrative, Luis Alberto states that if he were to go back to Peru, his long-term ties there would be revived and provide him with what he now says he lacks. Nevertheless, his nine years in Hamburg have led to a change in his network. Since the Peruvian contacts are waning, he is trying to establish and strengthen his network in Hamburg, which mostly consists in individual relationships. Among these, there are a few people he considers particularly important, because he feels they

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have a strong connection; they are always there for each other and are like family members. These ascriptions found in the narrative confirm the idea rendered by the network map that Luis Antonio is reconstructing his former Peruvian network in Hamburg. He now has a sister in Peru and a friend that he states is like “a sister” to him in Hamburg. He also had a particularly good friend in Peru (Fernando), to whom he cannot talk as often as he would like, and one particularly good friend in Hamburg (Marek), with whom he shares nearly everything. The dynamic process present both in the map and the narrative leads to continuous change in his network, which Luis Alberto is conscious of: “if you had asked me perhaps four years ago or earlier, maybe many things would have been a bit different” 109. Four years earlier, more Peruvian contacts would have been important and the composition of his network in Germany would have been different. The circle of acquaintances in Hamburg is constantly changing, since both the city and the university context he is in lead to such dynamics (see above). To sum up, Luis Alberto, who is currently working and studying in Germany, has a number of friends and acquaintances in Hamburg and regularly keeps in touch with his family and friends in Peru. Nevertheless, he feels quite lonely despite his constant efforts to stay in touch with his friends and to support them. He also feels that his situation is unresolved, because he does not know where he will live in the future. This intermediate state bothers him and makes him feel the need to cultivate contacts and nurture the networks he has, both in the city he is currently in, and in the country he may decide to go back to. This turns out to be a lot of work and quite an 109

“wenn du mich vielleicht vor vier Jahren gefragt hättest oder früher, wäre vieles vielleicht ein bisschen anders geworden”.

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investment, which he is currently willing to make, though he also expresses uncertainty about whether he can and wants to endure this situation of fission much longer. 5.2

“Always supported by someone”: Seung-min’s communities

The second interview presented and analysed in detail in this study is with Seung-min Won, who is 27 years old and has been living and studying in Germany for four years. When I ask her whether I can do an interview with her, she says she would love to do so because she is so happy with her life in Germany, a point which she then also emphasises often throughout the interview. Seung-min first lived in a city in Western Germany, and then moved to Hamburg, where she has been living for the last 17 months. While studying Primary School Pedagogy in South Korea, Seung-min took an interest in Special Education. When she asked her professor how she could deepen her understanding of the topic, he suggested she should go to Germany and study it there. She followed his advice, left for the city in Western Germany and has been studying Rehabilitation Pedagogy as her main subject and Cultural Science as her subsidiary subject. She is currently in her fourth term at university. Through her professor, she got to know of an evangelical community in Bonn: the professor and a friend of his had also both studied in that city. At the time, they had got to know the community themselves; the professor's friend had stayed in close contact with its members. This circumstance helped Seung-min get a room in Bonn, where she was also introduced to the community. There, she met many people, all Germans, older than herself, who supported and still support her in various ways, although she has since moved away from Bonn. Among other things, they have helped her find a flat, finance her studies and find jobs.

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5.2.1 Knowing Germans to settle in In order to feel comfortable and satisfied in Germany, it is important to Seung-min to have a lot of German, or more precisely non-Korean, friends. She wants to meet Germans because she connects this to “settling in”: “and uh yEs * mh Hm *4* “actually, it's like this *as you can see * uh apart from Soo-jin and Ms Choi I have relatively many * well mos=mostly uhm GERman uh frie//frien//friends or acquaintances in m//my life. Because since the beginning I tried to get to know as many Germans as possible or like not necessarily Koreans, but uhm Germans or foreigners mh * to settle in uhh better in Germany or rather to get to know Geeermany uh better hmhm and Germ//uhm yes Germany, this culture or the people, the way of thinking and uh and so on *” 110. For Seung-min it is necessary to settle in to what is currently her host country, Germany. To do so, she wants to “get to know” the country, which to her means knowing the culture, the people and the way of thinking. To gather this knowledge, it is necessary for her to know Germans, since in her view they are the ones who can best impart this knowledge to her. In this scenario, Koreans would interfere with her process of settling in, which makes it clearer why she eschews contact with them. 110

“und äh jA * mh Hm *4* eigentlich, also es ist so * ähm * wie du siehst * äh außer Soo-jin und Frau Choi habe ich relativ viele * also über=überwiegend äh dEutsche äg Freu// Freun// Freunde oder Bekannte in mei// meinem Leben. Denn äh von Anfang an habe ich versucht * möglichst viele Deutsche oder * so nicht unbedINgt Koreaner, sondern äh Deutsche oder AuslÄnder kennenzulernen hm* damit ich mich in Deutschland ahh besser einleben kann oder beziehungsweise, damit ich DEUtschlaand ah besser kEnnenlernen kann (I: aha) hmhm und Deut// ähm ja Deutschland, diese Kultur oder die Leute, die Menschen, Denkweise und äh und so weiter *”

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Seung-min's idea of the meaning of “settling in somewhere” implies getting to know Germany in a specific way. Since Germany is too vague to get to know as such, she selects certain aspects which she believes are relevant to understand the country. According to her criteria, she needs to look into the culture, the people and the way of thinking. These are a few stepping stones on her way to knowing the country; a few of the things she can get to know. These are not the only things she needs to become acquainted with, however. The list is incomplete, as suggested by her adding “and so on”. There is more than this for her to learn: the task Seung-min has set herself is quite an extensive and unspecific one, without any clear criteria to indicate when she has achieved her aim. In Seung-min's process of getting to know the country, people play a major role. They are the conveyors of the information she aims to grasp. Her account shows that in her view, German people are the best eligible conveyors since their being German gives them the credentials to serve as mediators. If this criterion of being German is met, then by interacting with her they can help Seung-min get to know the “way of thinking” and the “culture”. To better comprehend Seung-min's view of her learning process, it is necessary to return to her statement that from the beginning of her time in Germany, she tried to meet as many Germans or (other) non-Germans as possible, but not Koreans. Germans and foreigners are mentioned together, but as distinct groups. This implies that it is not only Germans who can help her understand the country, the culture and way of thinking better. Foreigners can, too, but not all foreigners: Koreans are not included in this category. She sees everyone but her own compatriots as a means of learning something about Germany when she socialises with them. Other Koreans, however, would not contribute any new perspectives; they would not be able to tell her anything she is not capable of

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finding out herself. Knowing Koreans would not be conducive to her aim. Although she has never avoided Koreans completely, Seungmin therefore prefers Germans and other non-Korean foreigners. She sees having a multinational group of acquaintances with many Germans in it as worth striving for, as opposed to being enclosed in a group of people from one's country of origin. Mentioning the network map she has drawn (“as you can see”, see quote above), Seung-min states that most of the people she knows are Germans, because it is Germany she wanted to get to know. She is aware that there are Koreans on the map, but these are very few exceptions: “Apart from Soo-jin and Ms Choi I have relatively many * well mos=mostly uhm GERman uh frie//frien//friends or acquaintances in m//my life.” 111 Knowing Germans stands in contrast to knowing Koreans, and the number of Germans in Seung-min’s network outweighs the number of Koreans. Seung-min shows that she regards this as an important and noteworthy situation by emphasising it: she has not just many, but even “mostly” German contacts. The larger number of German acquaintances than of others is not a coincidence but the result of her own efforts, as Seung-min herself discloses. Ever since she took the decision to go to Germany, Seung-min started socialising with Germans. She not only wanted to get to know Germans, but to meet as many as possible, as quickly as possible. To this end, being introduced to a religious community (in this case an Evangelical Free Church) even before her arrival in Germany was a very effective way to achieve this goal. She describes these German people she has spoken about until now and with whom she actively 111

“und äh jA * mh Hm *4* eigentlich, also es ist so * ähm * wie du siehst * äh außer Soo-jin und Frau Choi habe ich relativ viele * also über=überwiegend äh dEutsche äg Freu// Freun// Freunde oder Bekannte in mei// meinem Leben.”

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engages as “brothers and sisters” from the community, as “important”, and as “like a family”. In this passage, after faltering while saying “friends” twice, she then amends it with the term “acquaintances / less intimate friends” 112 . These acquaintances have varied functions in her current German environment and are important for different reasons. At the same time, what they all have in common is their major role in her process of settling in. This issue of being part of a group and of settling in in Germany is of relevance throughout the interview. The community is her first direct introduction to a subordinate group, a “we” within the larger German “we”. 5.2.2 In community we trust: supportive “brothers and sisters” Seung-min’s main port of call when she arrives to Germany is the religious community that she had got in touch with through her professor in South Korea, who was part of the community during his own time in Bonn: “he was also yes when he was in in Bonn, he was in this community, too (I: Yes) mhmh and he knew uh all all the uh (searching for the word) the uh brothers and G// er sisters (breathes in) and er yes, then I simply uhm after my studies after my uh a=after graduating I came to Germany” 113. By linking her to “all the brothers and sisters” in the community, the professor acts as a middleman to a whole network of people in 112

The word used by her in German is “Bekannte”, which also translates to “friends” in English, but means “less intimate friends” (but not quite acquaintances, either). The translation here is imperfect.

113

“er war ja auch ja als er in in Bonn war, war er auch in dieser Gemeinde (I. ja) hmhm und er kannte ja gut eh all all die ah (sucht nach Worten) die ah Brüder und G// äh Schwestern (Einatmen) und äh ja, da bin ich ähm einfach nach meinem Studium nach meinem ah n=nach dem Abschluss meines Studiums ah nach Deutschland gekommen”.

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Seung-min's new environment who will soon prove very valuable to her. Her contacts in the community offer various kinds of support. Before her arrival, the community organised a room for her to stay in. A few months after her arrival, Seung-min experienced financial difficulties which the community helped her solve; they find jobs for her and support her emotionally. Seung-min depicts all this as support that is offered to her by her contacts after she mentions a need of hers, not after her requesting support. In the following, I describe these mechanisms by which support is provided. 5.2.2.1 The community offers jobs During her time in Bonn, Seung-min took on five different jobs, which were all procured by her contacts in the community. These connections prove highly profitable and efficient for her, since they use their own contacts to unproblematically find Seung-min a source of income whenever she needs one: “so for me it was quite easy [to find a job], because so EVerything is based on this- (laughs) this relationship, because I uhhh got most of the jobs through them, like for example through Emma or Cordula.” 114 Seung-min portrays herself as the receiver of support from her community contacts, who easily get in touch with their own acquaintances to find jobs for her, for example in a bakery and a tea shop. She describes this process as quite simple for everyone involved, since it requires only small steps and little effort on each person's part, i.e. she asks someone and that someone asks on her behalf. It is also highly efficient, since if everyone in the community asks several of their own acquaintances, they will very probably find 114

“also für mich wars ganz einfach [einen Job zu finden], denn also ALLes ah basiert auf dies- (lacht) diese Beziehung, denn fast die meisten Stelle hab ich durch sie, also zum Beispiel durch Emma oder durch Cordula aah vermittelt bekommen.”

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job openings somewhere in the near future. In fact, the baker's answer (“yes, anytime” 115 ), which Seung-min reports, illustrates this apparent effortlessness. As she herself states, finding jobs this way is very easy for her, since she only has to express interest in having a job, wait for someone to approach her with a new job offer and then take it up. 5.2.2.2 The community provides accommodation Another main kind of support which the community can provide is financial support and accommodation. Before her arrival, the brothers and sisters organise a room for Seung-min to live in, but after a few months her budget is exhausted: “(Breathes in) But unfortunately, I had not taken enough money with me, so after six or seven months not enough of my money was left for me to stay in Germany any longer. (Breathes in) And then I told Emma that I uhm, mayb// currently have (searching for words) a big financial prob//uhm problems, difficulties.” 116 Her financial straits require something to happen, and Seung-min has to take action. She either has to find a new source of funding or she has to leave Germany, which is not her wish. The first step she takes is to tell one of the other members about her situation: she talks to Emma. At first, the message she gives Emma seems insecure and tentative: “mayb// currently”. By talking about it like this, Seung-min implies that the problematic situation is only temporary and can be overcome. Nev115

“Ja jederzeit”.

116

“(Einatmen) Aber leider hatte ich äh nicht so viel äh GEld dabei (I: hm) ahmhm also pfff nach äh * nach nach sechs oder sieben Monaten ah äh ist äh ist mein=eh Geld nicht sOO viel übrig, dass ich weiter in Deutschland bleiben konnte. (Einatmen) Und da habe ich ähm Emma äh gesagt, dass ich ähh viell// momentaan ts (Suche nach Wort) eine große finanzielle Prob// äh Probleme, Schwierigkeit habe.”

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ertheless, for that to happen, something has to change or be changed radically, and very soon, as shown by her choice of words: “[B]ig financial problems/difficulties” cannot be overcome slowly and can be solved more easily with somebody else's help. Here, Seung-min is asking for support in a tentative but at the same time urgent manner. Talking to Emma changes the situation and opens up new opportunities. Now Seung-min is no longer the only one in her current environment in Germany who knows about the problem, and is not alone in having to deal with it. If Emma has an interest in keeping Seung-min from having to leave immediately, she will somehow help to change the situation, which she then does, by offering her to move in with her: “and uhh THEN SHE offered to me to go and live together at HER place. (I: uuh yes) mhmh and I lived with her together for nearly a year * mhmh and so mh she is very uh special, a very special peeerson.” 117 The expression Seung-min uses “living together at HER place” shows that although Seung-min goes to live in Emma’s flat and is de facto her guest, the relationship is not a hierarchical host-guest relationship but a more egalitarian one, based on the idea of togetherness. The two of them now form a new small (sub)community. Although Emma is actually the host, they live together in a relationship that resembles one between flatmates. Seung-min lives with Emma for nearly a year. It seems a matter of concern to Seung-min to formulate Emma's offer as coming from her spontaneously. She emphasises, “sHE offered me to go and stay with HER”, to make it clear that it was Emma's idea and not her own. She merely told her about her financial problems and the rest 117

“(Einatmen) und ähh DA hat sIE mir angeboten, bei IHR zusammen zu wohnen. (I: aah ja) hmhm und ich hab bei ihr ah fast ein Jahr ah eh ja zusammen gewohnt * hmhm und dEswegen hm ist sie mir für mich ganz ah besonders, eine ganz besondere Persoon.”

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was Emma's initiative. Their living together for nearly a whole year creates vicinity, which makes Emma a special person. She is no longer just one of the sisters and brothers in the community, but the one who has helped her out of her difficulties. Seung-min concludes by saying that the fact that Emma offered her to live with her, and their living together, explains why Emma is such a special person for her. 5.2.2.3 The community provides financial support During the period when Seung-min lives with Emma, the community comes to know about her “being very poor financially”. What happens then typifies the way relationships and topics seem to work in this context: the topic of “Seung-min's neediness” is moved from the personal/private context to a more public one. At once, the whole community knows about her financial difficulties and then the elder decides that they will support her: “and thEn, during the time when I was living with Emma and the community learned that I uh like so to speak, was quite po=PO//(laughs) POOr financially and errrr, so as er ELdest he decided or he talked to others that errr THEY would uhh supPORt me.” 118 Again, the other members of the community offer solicitous support and Seung-min does not have to ask for it directly. The community “hears about” her neediness and the elder takes action, consulting other community members who then support Seungmin financially for nearly a year. The monthly remittances constitute a strong link between Seung-min and the community. It is not 118

“und dabEi, in der Zeit wo ich bei Emma gewohnt habe und ha=haben ha=hat die Gemeinde erfahren, dass ich ah sozusagen ganz A=Ar//(Lacht) ARm war finanziell und äh ER, also als äh ÄLtester er hat beschlossen oder er hat mit anderen gesprochen, dass äh SIE aah mich ah unterstÜtzen.”

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clear whether the community expects anything of Seung-min in return and if so, what. Seung-min does not mention any intention or expectation that the money should be given back at a later point in time, so it is not a loan but a donation. She does not explain the conditions for the donations either, i.e. there seem not to be any. The donors do not expect or receive any tangible, material added value back. They donate out of a sense of shared responsibility for Seung-min and out of altruistic charity. Their interest can be seen as a religious or spiritual one and might be compared with an offertory in church. In this case, however, the donors know exactly to whom they are donating and for what purpose: they have a personal connection to the recipient of their donations and can partake of the outcomes of their expenditures. For Seung-min, the monetary link entails a moral commitment and a dependency. Having been given the money to be able to stay in Germany, she can now concentrate on her studies, which she would otherwise have to give up on. She is aware of the significance of the donations and their consequences: “[...] that is the greatest experience err I have had in Germany (I: uhuh). And ehrrmm * umm, yes, that I ummm * hm always hm ** yes th=errm will always be supported by someone uh * uh, funded uh. So that I can errmm totally concentrate on on errmm my studies.” 119 The funds given to Seung-min and the accommodation in one of the other community members’ homes allow her to concentrate on studying without having to worry about her income. She depends on their benevolence to the extent that if they withdraw their 119

“[…] das ist die größte Erfahrung ah, die ich in Deutschland gemacht habe (I: aha). Und ehmm * ähm ja, dass ich ähm * hm immer hm ** ja d=ehm immer von jemandem ah * unterstützt ah, finanziert ah werd. Damit ich mich ähm ahm ganz auf auf ähm mein Studium ahm konzentrieren kann.”

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favour she will be in the same situation as before, and will have to go back to South Korea without finishing university. The allowance therefore ties her very strongly to the community both morally and financially. This situation, however, is not described as problematic at all. On the contrary, it is “the greatest experience” she has had in Germany. 5.2.2.4 The community thinks and prays As indicated above, various community members, including a couple, the Scheinerts, support her financially. When talking about this, though, Seung-min makes a point of clarifying that it is not simply financial support which she receives: Interviewer: “And how did he [Mr Scheinert] mean that, I want to support you, what did he mean by that? and how does he support you? (S: errm) in what way?” Seung-min: “Um, so * h// he, so they they [the Scheinerts] transfer errm money to me monthly (I: uh okay) hm (I: uhuh) yes. And not oOnly like materially, but also quite uhm, yes that for me is a great EMOtional or * yes ** inner like suppORT (I: uhuh) hm. That someone thinks about me like thAT and so on.” 120 The Scheinerts have offered to transfer a fixed amount of money to Seung-min's account, thus helping her out financially. Nevertheless, Seung-min points out that it is not just the money which is relevant in their relationship, but also the emotional support they provide her with. This is not something external or superficial but something 120

Interviewerin: “Und wie meinte er [Herr Scheinert] das, ich möchte dich unterstützen, was meinte er damit? und wie unterstützt er dich? (I: öhm) inwiefern?“ Seung-min: “Ähm, also * d// er , also sie sie [die Scheinerts] überweisen äh mir monatlich Geld (I: ah okay) hm (I: aha) ja. Und nicht nUur so materiEll, sondern auch ganz ähm, ja das ist ja für mich eine große EmotionALE oder * ja ** innerliche so UnterstÜtzung (I: aha) hm. Dass eh jemand an mich sO denkt und so. ”

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that she also feels inside herself: it is “inner” support. Knowing that they think about her is quite meaningful to her and adds greatly to the material support they supply. Now that Seung-min is in Hamburg and not any longer in Bonn where the Scheinerts and the other community members still live, this inner support is nourished by frequent phone calls during which they talk about how things are going. In Seung-min's narrative, her contacts from the community see her primarily as a student. Her duties as a student, e.g. taking examinations, are considered relevant in her current life and are therefore central in their communication: “Cordula, Emma, the Scheinerts, Dietrich ehm, that I met in the community, they are grEAtly INterested in me * or rather in my stUdies and in my life in Hamburg, how I am and how my studies are going.” 121 During these phone calls, the Scheinerts, and also other community members, enquire about her current situation. They show great curiosity and a wish to be informed about her life. In order to find out about things they cannot participate in or influence directly, they fall back upon asking “lots of questions”, especially about her studies: “And so they ask me lots of questions (both laugh): ‘Seung-min how was your exam?’ and er ‘how are your studies going?’, ‘are you very streeeessed?’ and er uhm and ‘if youuu have prob//problems then er just let us er know, so that we know, so that we can pray for you

121

“ähpfff zum Beispiel * ähm Sch// also äh Cordula, Emma, Scheinerts, Dietrich ähm, die ich in der Gemeinde kennengelernt habe, sie ham ja, sie interesSIEREn sich sEHr für mich * beziehungsweise für mein StUdium und für mein Leben in Hamburg, wie es mir gEht und wie mein Studium läuft.”

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or so that weee ts can somehow er like help er somehow’ like (I: uhuh) hmhm yes*” 122. Generated by their interest in her studies, the questions are the community members’ way of standing by her in her everyday life. She knows what to expect when they talk to each other and even repeats the wording as if the questions were always recurrent. The questions can only be this specific and precise because Seung-min constantly keeps them informed about what she is currently doing. They can then ask explicitly about an exam mentioned in a previous conversation, prove their involvement and maintain their participation in her studies. Their asking about the exam also increases the legitimacy of the phone call more than simply asking how things are going. This legitimacy is then further strengthened by their general enquiry about her studies, her stress level and most significantly a permanent offer of help at any given time. Her fellow community members presume that the duties linked to her studies make her stressed and create problems. Consequently, the solution is for them to offer their support, which she can fall back upon at any time. Seung-min quotes this offer, which portrays her contacts as a group of people who build a safety net of helpers: whenever she has problems she can contact them. Their connection is one based on help from them for her, which they offer willingly: she just needs to let them know she has a problem and they will do their best to help. In her words, they actually seem to be expecting her to phone and ask for help because of the difficulties her studies pose her. The 122

“Und deswegen stellen sIE mir viele Fragen (beide lachen): ‘Seung-min wie war deine Prüfung‘ und äh ‘wie läuft dein Studium?‘, ‘hast du viel Streeess?‘ und eh ahm und ‘wenn duuu Prob// Probleme hast, dann eh sag uns einfach eh bescheid, damit wir wissen, damit wir für dich beten kann ah beten können oder damit wiir tz dir irgendwie äh so helfen ah können‘ so (I: aha) hmhm ja *”.

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consequence of her contacting them would then be that they know if she is having difficulties (“damit wir wissen”). As discussed above, as soon as the community hears about any difficulties she might be having, its members can take action. Her telling them about it is therefore the first step towards their offer to help solve the problem. Although Seung-min is currently not in Bonn any longer, the community still wants to support her. To show they still care and want to assist her, they offer her intangible support: i.e. prayer. Praying is a kind of support which can be offered and provided at any time and place by individual group members or by the group simultaneously, e.g. during group gatherings. To activate this help system, Seung-min simply needs to pick up the telephone. Then, the collective can take action and support her – the individual person – from far away. Seung-min is given the certainty that in moments of difficulty the community will include her in their prayers, thereby also including her in the community itself. Although she has moved away from them, she enjoys a special status, which allows her to be an object of their prayers. Besides providing solace to the person in need, who is informed that the community is praying for them, this practice at the same time reinforces the group and its group identity. 5.2.2.5 The community provides moral and spiritual support Although she does not live in Bonn any longer, the community is still very relevant for Seung-min when it comes to intangible support, as shown in the above and in the following quote: “So if I have any problems, then I ask myself ‘uh, God, what are your plans, uh, what should I do now?’ and so on. Uh, in that case I can turn to the people, for example Cordula, Emma and so on, who CAN tell me something mhhmh. And who (inhaling) uhh ** yes, who I can talk to

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errr about the Bible or about faith (I: uhuh) yes.” 123 This kind of intangible support is provided for example when Seung-min is not sure what to do to solve a problem which may arise in everyday life (“any problem” 124) and which she cannot solve alone. She presents such problems as God-given tasks, which she decides to then tackle from a religious perspective. Seung-min seeks the advice of two other community members, Cordula and Emma, whom she previously called “my mums in Germany”. She knows she can call on them and they will be able to stand by her. She turns to them in the confidence that they will help her understand God's will and find a solution. These are the most important people she can talk to about religious topics, such as the Bible and belief. This kind of support is particularly relevant to Seung-min; it is not only important to her but even necessary, as she states herself: “Yeah, tHAt's why mhhmh *** I need uh, thee the people who can always uhmm like give me mhh, spiritual support errr spiritual words.” 125 These contacts can tell Seung-min what she needs to hear in certain situations. They can offer her the right spiritual words, at any time, so she can always count on them.

123

“Also wenn wenn ich irgendein Problem habe, dann frage ich mich ja ‘ah Gott was hast du denn vor? ah was soll ich jetzt machen’ und so. Ah in dem Fall kann ich mich an die Personen wenden, zum Beispiel Cordula, Emma und so, DIE mir was sagen können hmhm. Und mit denen (Einatmen) ahh ** ja, mit denen ich mich äh über Bibel oder über Glauben unterhalten eh kann (I: aha) ja.”

124

“irgendein Problem”.

125

“Ja, dEswegen hmhm *** brauch ich äh, diee die Leute, die mir immer so hm, geistliche Unterstützung äh geistliche Wörter äh geben können.”

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5.2.2.6 The community: a collectivistic network of helping hands The community has always provided Seung-min with various things she needs: contact to people from Germany, a feeling of belonging to a “we”, financial support, accommodation, jobs, financial resources, as well as moral and spiritual support. Based on her past experience, Seung-min knows that when she is in need, she can describe her situation to a member of the community and someone will promptly make arrangements for her. As in the case with the professor before she came to Germany and with Emma who invited her to live with her, someone comes to Seung-min's aid when she expresses her difficulties, without her actually having to explicitly ask for support. She tells one person about her situation and that person and/or others help her. Addressing and confiding in one specific person from the community has led to Seung-min getting help in her financial crisis or in any other challenging situation she has been in. Seung-min’s stories prove that she is perceived as someone who is worthy of support in other's people's view. As a trustworthy community member, she can rely on the others’ spontaneous and generous charity. The result of this mechanism is that she does not need to ask for support, but naturally receives help and can take it for granted. There are constantly various hands “hovering” nearby in the community; in such cases of need, one or more hands will readily support a needy community member and protect them from difficulties. It is as if the situation itself called for support and someone provided it. If one or more members sense that another member of the community is in need, and if they have the opportunity and the resources to do so, help is then offered and provided. The community therefore displays a collectivistic, altruistic orientation. The close cohesion amongst its members creates a rescue net which is tailored to function swiftly and provide support in an uncomplicated manner. This is also in line with Seung-min’s con-

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ception of her network, which leads her to state that actually it is not her who is at the centre of her network, but God. By offering this explanation, Seung-min reveals an explanation of the mechanisms which have led to her being so broadly and efficiently supported when in need: if each community member has the same understanding and places God and not themselves in the centre of their life, then, by supporting the individual, the community members are actually serving God. The act of leaving oneself out of the equation and placing God in the centre of the network leads to the creation of a community model that is very much based on a sense of cohesiveness. The group identity in the community is rooted in a strong common belief and an understanding that people’s lives revolve around God (and not mainly around themselves), which then naturally entails mutually supportive behaviour. 5.2.2.7 Community means reciprocal support Most of the favours and the support Seung-min has received so far do not have to be returned, or cannot be: Seung-min will most probably not be able to give anything back to her professor but her gratitude. Similarly, she will probably not be able to do Emma, the Scheinerts and others any favours as big as those she has received from them. The support relationships may seem to be unidirectional. However, this does not make them problematic: on the contrary, the other members’ support is precisely what makes them such special people to Seung-min. Also, the understanding described above, in which the community is based on an orientation towards service to other people as service to God, also legitimises this unidirectional support in Seung-min’s case. It is not relevant who supports whom, how or how much, since any kind of service is a form of commitment to the community and to God. Nevertheless, having described at length how she has obtained help

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from others, Seung-min addresses her own wish to provide a service and to give something back to the community. At the least, she would like to know something about the other community members, too, when they talk on the phone: “and uh yes, so I, I, I would, yes, I would also like to know how they are.” 126 The part of the conversation in which she is told how they are, nevertheless, does not seem to take place. Her wish to be given an insight into their lives and perhaps in turn to know about who is in need of support from her, be it prayer or other kinds of support, remains unfulfilled. The phone calls show a concentration on her as the main topic of discussion. Their numerous questions either leave no time for her to ask them anything in turn, or else their topics are not considered interesting enough to talk about. From their point of view, no major changes have occurred: they are still the same community, still surrounded by the same people and they still mainly do the same things as before. It is her life which has changed and is therefore interesting and worth talking about. Seung-min addresses this imbalance between speaking and listening. Seung-min is interested in hearing about them, about the community she knows so well and has left behind. She would like to be included in the community by knowing about its activities – and thus being able to think about and pray for others, too. She does, in fact, sum up that the conversations are about their daily lives: about hers but also about theirs, although theirs is only a side issue and only rarely or briefly touched upon. By stating that they talk about “our daily, everyday life” 127 on the telephone, she does include herself in the community. She is still one of a group of people who keeps in touch. How126

“und öh ja, also ich ich ich würde ja ich würde ja auch gern wissen wie es ihnen geht.”

127

“unser täglich, alltägliches Leben”.

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ever, she describes the relationship as somewhat imbalanced: the others are informed about her life and can participate in it, but she is not informed about theirs, although she would like to be. Thus, she cannot actively contribute as much to the community, cannot think about her brothers and sisters in their everyday lives because she does not know what is going on in their lives and cannot pray for them. Therefore, she cannot duly serve. Despite this imbalance, Seung-min’s final statement shows she nevertheless feels part of the “we”. Her longing and her availability to serve therefore seem to be enough to legitimate her membership. Further, the others actively include her in the community by taking an interest in her, phoning her, thinking about her, praying for her and sending her funding for her studies. What seems to be a one-sided relationship may therefore be, all in all, balanced when seen from a communitarian and collectivistic perspective. 5.2.3 Relationships beyond the community The community, as a fairly closed, protective, spontaneously supportive environment, stands in contrast with other environments in which Seung-min is involved, e.g. university. The community, which she came in contact with through a professor of hers in South Korea, provides her with support without her having to ask and is active in establishing contact with her: “The other people [the community members] ** were or are those who *** first * talked to me and uhm * those who intensively or very uhm yes very actively tried to help me. * And errr * mh great uhm, those whoo, who showed great interest in me. (I: uhuh) mhmh yes and they uhh often invited me mhmh, yes for coffee or into their home and due to that I could

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gradually uhm like get to know them and uh, then I could uh, lose my inhibitions.” 128 The process of getting to know the people from the community is enabled by them inviting her more than once to join them for coffee. By “actively” and continuously inviting her to their homes, they show Seung-min they are interested in spending time with her. This gives her the time and the space to get to know them so that she feels safe enough to open up to them. In other contexts, contact has to be established in other ways. However, this does not always happen as successfully as with the community. The following examples describe further relationships that are situated beyond the community, situations in which they do or do not come into being, how they are fostered and the role they play in Seung-min’s everyday life. 5.2.3.1 Not knowing fellow students In contrast to the community members, who intentionally engage with her, Seung-min’s fellow students do not insist, and leave the decision to take further action up to her: they offer their help but let her choose whether she wants to draw upon their resources. While the community contacts set up appointments and activities which they explicitly ask her to join, the students signal their availability but do not demand her participation. Their offers therefore 128

“die anderen Personen ** waren oder sind diejenigen, die *** zuerst * mich angesprochen haben und äh * diejenigen, die intensIv oder ganz eh ja ganz aktiv versucht machen mich, mit zu helfen hmhm. * Und ähh * hm ein großes ähm, diejenigen diee, die ein großes Interesse an mir gezeigt haben (I: aha) hmhm ja und sie haben mich ahh viel eingeladen hmhm, ja vielleicht zum Kaffee oder zu ihnen zu Hause und dadurch konnte ich ah allmählich ah also sie kennenlernen und eh, da konnte ich ah, die HEmmungen abbauen.”

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require a decision on her part which she cannot or does not want to actively take because she feels she does not know them well enough yet: “That’s why mhmh perhaps if I have the chance, chances to go for a mh a coffee with them or yees, do something together mhmh like except study// studying mhmmh. Like going to the cinema or like, like doing something I can, then I can get to know them better.” 129 Here, doing something together besides studying is the key to getting to know each other better, which, in turn, would be the key to her opening up to the other people in question. However, with her fellow students such situations do not arise. This leads to Seungmin barely having any contact to fellow students or other people her age. She is in touch with only one other young woman from Bonn with whom she used to work. Although she states that she would appreciate more contact to her fellow students, she describes this as difficult. She ascribes this difficulty to the fact that she is offered support by her fellow students but would then have to actively draw upon their resources, which she does not feel like doing. 5.2.3.2 Chatting with a compatriot While she would appreciate more interaction with her fellow students, Seung-min tried to avoid meeting other Koreans. However, it was not possible to avoid them completely: “mhm, so I actually avoided getting to know like KorREAns, like especially, but because I uhm got to know uhm Soo-jin by chance like in the community and 129

“Deswegen hmhm vielleicht wenn ich die Gelegenheit, Gelegenheiten habe, mit ihnen zum hm zum Kaffee so trinken gehen oder jaa, irgendwas gemeinsam unternehmen hmhm so außer außer studie// Studium hmmhm. So ins Kino gehen oder so, sowas unternehmen kann, dann kann ich sie besser kennen lernen.”

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that, and because we meet regularly, like Sundays in the community (breathes in) hmhm she// * yes we are by now quite good uhm frIENDs.” 130 Seung-min distinguishes between specifically wanting to meet Koreans and meeting Koreans by chance. She herself has refrained from wanting to meet Koreans but has not managed or did not want to avoid casual acquaintances such as with Soo-jin, another member of the community. Their meeting in the community would itself not necessarily have led to their socialising. Their closer contact came about through the regular community meetings they both attended each Sunday. Even if she had tried to, Seung-min would have had difficulty avoiding Soo-jin. In the long run, being part of the same community and attending the same ceremonies led to contact which she now defines as a friendship. Seung-min defines this specific relationship as a friendship although she is not friends with all the community members. In fact, she does not call anyone else a friend. This account of Seung-min’s shows that a friendship is not something that is established quickly, but grows over time. It cannot be assessed easily, either, as shown by the final part of the sentence, which is worded and emphasised particularly carefully. Altogether, in this case the process of becoming friends has required a common space and time, common rituals, common aims, personal commonalities, regular meetings and the fundamental reciprocal willingness to become involved with each other. These circumstances and these surroundings can provide the 130

“mhm, deswegen habe ich sogar vermieden KoreAner, also extra Koreaner so kennenzulernen, aber dadurch dass ich ähm Soo-jin ähm in der Gemeinde, also zufällig ah kennengelernt habe und dass dadurch dass, dass wir uns regelmäßig, also Sonntags in der Gemeinde treffen (Einatmen) hmhm si// * ja sind wir mittlerweile ganz gut ahh befrEUndet.”

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exceptional context in which Seung-min allows herself to be in contact with other Koreans and to even become “quite good friends”. With some uncertainty, Seung-min then describes and stresses that she not only appreciates being in contact with Soo-jin but actually needs it: “And uhm yes, mhm * sometimes I do nEEd yes like fellow countrymen (I: Yes) uhm, so that I can (laughs) well like uhm * yes, sa//talk about something very EASily * mhmh, yes that’s why uhm, SHE is my yes, like Korean CONversation uhm partner.” 131 Seung-min is mainly in touch with Germans and non-Korean foreigners. To get to know Germany better, she actively surrounds herself with Germans. This leads to her having to speak German most of the time, which demands concentration and effort. From time to time, a break from this environment becomes necessary, during which she can communicate with more ease, say everything she wants to express without effort and relax in the situation. This is possible with her Korean friend Soo-jin. As a “compatriot”, as Seung-min calls her, Soo-jin is a representative of Seung-min’s old surroundings, things which are very familiar to her and that she does not need to get to know (as is the case with German). When they are together, Seung-min's need for a hiatus is satisfied. What Seung-min treasures about being friends with Soo-jin is the chance to talk a lot and easily in Korean, which cannot happen in other relationships. With Soo-jin the language plays an important role: Seung-min can indulge in speaking her mother tongue and in expressing anything she wants to say freely. The fact that she speaks a lot and without effort also shows that the conversation is straightforward and relaxed. In this constellation, Seung-min can 131

“Und ähm ja, mhm * manchmal brAuche ich ja so Landesleute (I: Ja) äh, damit ich auf Koreanisch (Lacht) viel ah * so so ja, ganz LOcker s//ä was erzählen kann * hmhm, ja deswegen hm is sIE mein meine ja, so koreanische ANsprech ah partnerin.”

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speak without restraint. She can talk as much as she wants about any topic of her choosing. The discussion with Soo-jin is not planned or normed and does not follow specific rituals. What marks it is that it is in Korean, which distinguishes it from most other conversations Seung-min has in Germany. Having explained the framework of their friendship and of the meeting, Seung-min concludes by calling Soo-jin her “Korean conversation partner.” Soo-jin is the person Seung-min contacts when she wants to just talk: to speak Korean, to talk a lot and without effort. She is her Korean counterpart when she needs one. Seung-min does not talk about them doing anything together, so this is not a relationship based on joint activities (although the joint activities in the community did provide the starting point for their friendship). This is a relationship based on their speaking Korean when Seung-min feels like it and on being “compatriots”. 5.2.3.3 Feeling understood by a fellow pedagogue Another individual that Seung-min talks about is Ms Choi. She is the last of the ten people Seung-min first lists when asked to name people important to her at the beginning of the interview. While placing her on the network map, Seung-min states: “and uh I met Ms Choi yes, * here, perhaps [places sticky note onto the map] * I happened to meet her uhm uh in Bonn * hmhm and uuh ** also also really coincidentally, but not in the community, but uh * totally coincidentally uh I met her and uhh * hmm * 3 *” 132. Ms Choi seems to be someone Seung-min is connected to in a respectful, more official and a slightly more distant relationship than to other people 132

“Und äh Frau Choi habe ich auch ähm, ja * vielleicht hier * hab ich ähm ah in Bonn kennengelernt * hmhm und eeeh ** auch auch ganz zufällig, aber nicht in der in der Gemeinde, sondern äh * überhaupt äh ganz zufällig äh habe ich sie kennengelernt und ööh * hmm * 3*”.

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who are important to her. The only other people she names by their surname are the couple she refers to as “the Scheinerts”. Although they are also called by their surname, they are not “Mr and Mrs”, which would sound quite formal. On the contrary, the appellation “the Scheinerts” makes it sound as if they are on familiar terms with each other. Ms Choi, however, is the only person Seung-min mentions with this formal and important status. While talking about Ms Choi, Seung-min places her on the map and is uncertain about where to position her, as shown by the words “here, perhaps” and by the expressions of hesitation before and after this. Ms Choi can therefore only be placed with a “maybe”, relativising the validity of the placement and leaving an option for a modification. Seung-min and Ms Choi met in Bonn, not in the community, and “totally coincidentally”. Unlike with Soo-jin, whose acquaintance Seungmin made in the community, the context or setting within which Ms Choi and Seung-min met remains vague and Seung-min twice emphasises the fact that the meeting happened “really coincidentally”. This is in line with her plan, discussed earlier, of not seeking out and even of avoiding other Koreans while in Germany (Ms Choi is originally from Korea, too), in order to be mainly in touch with Germans. Ms Choi, nevertheless, plays a role in Seung-min’s network and is introduced as follows: “yes, uhm she was you know, like she has been in Germany for uh f// twenty years, also uh er married to a German man * and she also worked uhm as a teacher you know in Korea, she studied pedagogy like and uhm she was immediately able to understAND me quite well uhm ah what I, what I studied in Korea or uhm * ehm yes hm as a peda// well pedagogue er like pedagogue [female equivalent] she was able to understand me

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quite well.” 133 Ms Choi's importance is first explained by their biographical similarities: Ms Choi has been living in Germany for a number of years, has a German partner, has worked in Korea as a teacher, and has also studied pedagogy. Ms Choi has been living in Germany for much longer than Seung-min and is married to her German partner, while Seung-min is not, or perhaps not yet. Nevertheless, Seung-min lists these similarities of theirs to justify Ms Choi’s importance as well as their similar educational and professional background. In Korea, Ms Choi was a teacher: this past activity and role of hers, combined with her studies of pedagogy, enables her to relate to and understand Seung-min, who also studied pedagogy in Korea. Their educational training and professional background are their main commonalities. Seung-min does not mention what Ms Choi is currently involved in, nor does she mention her own interest in Ms Choi and her activities. It is Ms Choi’s interest in herself which underlies their relationship: “and she is very interested in ME * what I will do uhh then in in Germany or study uhm experience and so on mhmh *” 134. Ms Choi’s interest in Seung-min as a person is directly linked to an interest in her activities and studies. Her interest due to their similar past studies in Korea has led to a present interest in the person, still mainly linked to the field of studying and the profession. What is more, Ms 133

“ja, ähm sie war ja, also sie ist seit eh f// zwanzig Jahren ah in Deutschland, auch mit einem deutschen Mann ah eh verheiratet * und sie hat ja in Korea auch ähm als Lehrerin ah gearbeitet, also Pädagogik studiert und ähm sie konnte mich gleich gut verstEhen ähm ah was ich, was ich in Korea studiert habe oder ähm * öhm ja hm als Päda// sozusagen Pädagoge äh Pädagogin konnte sie mich ganz gut versteehen.”

134

“und sie hat ein großes Interesse an mIR * was ich in in Deutschland weiter machen ahh werde oder studieren ähm erleben werde und so weiter hmhm *”.

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Choi's interest not only relates to Seung-min's past and her present, but also extends into the future. She is curious as to Seung-min's further career, Seung-min's development, her experience and her path in Germany. Ms Choi's interest is based on their similar past paths and leads to an interest in Seung-min’s present and future situation as a student of pedagogy. On her part, Seung-min does not express any particular interest in Ms Choi's life, activities, professional or personal experiences, or her future plans. The relationship is based mainly on Ms Choi's wish to partake in Seungmin's life. Seung-min's experiences and plans for her life in Germany are what Ms Choi is interested in. In a different environment, e.g. if they were both still or back in Korea, this interest may have been weaker, if not non-existent. Their both currently being in Germany provides the backdrop to the importance of this relationship. Ms Choi seems to be quite a few years older than Seung-min: she is called by her surname, has been living in Germany for twenty years and had already studied and worked in Korea before moving to Germany. Their age difference may therefore additionally explain Ms Choi interest in Seung-min's life and also Seung-min's respect for this interest, which she does not question, although it is not reciprocal. 5.2.3.4 Being introduced to the community by the professor A further individual contact that Seung-min mentions as important is her professor in Korea. In contrast to other people who are important to her, whom she calls by their names, Seung-min talks about him in his specific role as a “professor”, without adding a name, thus clearly labelling his function and their relationship: a hierarchical one in which she is his student and he is her professor. As mentioned above, while the professor was in Bonn he also lived in the community she now belongs to and therefore knew many of

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the “brothers and sisters” well. The professor thus made the connection between Seung-min and the community. He linked her not only to the community in general, but to “all the brothers and sisters” in particular. The people who were his brothers and sisters then are her brothers and sisters now, creating a direct continuity of role relationships. Nevertheless, Seung-min and the professor are not brother and sister themselves, because they were not in the community at the same time, leaving the hierarchy between them untouched. Being “brothers and sisters” is a functional description of the relationship between the community members: a function which implies close proximity. The professor's former and perhaps also current close proximity to the community members permitted Seung-min to “simply” come to Germany in order to deepen her knowledge in a specific field of studies within pedagogy. The connection between the professor and the community is one which has been established in the past and which is now stable enough that it can be tapped into at any time. Although the professor is not physically in the community or in Bonn any longer, he can rely on its members when it comes to sending a student of his there. He has established a permanent latent support connection which can be (re)activated from wherever at any time: an atemporal, geographically unbounded support tie. The professor's knowing all the brothers and sisters and being well connected to them made it possible for him to introduce Seung-min to the community and enabled her to come to Germany and profit from various kinds of support offered to her by the community members. 5.2.4 Jointly creating a caring community In contrast to all the other contacts Seung-min has discussed previously, her boyfriend David is someone she met in Hamburg, not in Bonn: “David is my uhm boyfriend * whom I met in Germa=well in

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Hamburg (breathing in) and uh, * yes, that's why he is (laughs) particularly important to me mhh” 135 . The place plays a particularly important role here. Seung-min starts out by saying that she met her boyfriend in Germany, but then promptly specifies that she met him in Hamburg. She then states that this is why David is particularly important to her: here, the sentence suggests that the place is the reason why he is so important to her. This is at least as relevant for his importance as his being her boyfriend. David is someone she has met alone, not intermediated by her professor, like the brothers and sisters in the community in Bonn or, in turn, facilitated by community members. Hamburg stands for autonomy in meeting people outside well-known settings, beyond cohesive groups and their networks. David is connected to this non-restrictive place in which Seung-min can befriend people of her own will and according to her own wishes. He therefore also stands for this independence. 5.2.4.1 Thinking about each other Seung-min then mentions David’s parents as important people in her network. She names them together, in their role as “his parents”: “and HaPe and Uta are uhm his parents * perhaps I can stick here (laughs)” 136. When mentioning David’s parents, Seungmin hesitates slightly, and she also hesitantly positions them on the map. This relationship may not be self-evident in its meaning but needs to be placed carefully on the map due to its importance to her. Together, David, his parents and Seung-min herself have 135

“David is mein äh Freund * den ich Deutschla=also in Hamburg ah kennengelernt habe (Einatmen) und ah * ja, deswegen bedeutet er mir (lacht) besOnders eh viel hmm”.

136

“und HaPe und Uta sind äh seine Eltern * vielleicht kann ich hier aufkleben (lacht dabei)”.

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become a small and apparently quite intimate group of people who think about and support one other, as will be illustrated in the following. The connection between Seung-min and David’s parents is intense: “they they take cAre of me a lot too and think of me a lot” 137. It is not an indirect connection via her boyfriend, but a direct and close one, which consists in them caring about her and thinking of her as an individual, as opposed to her and her boyfriend as a couple. Similarly to the relationship with the community members and to that with Ms Choi, Seung-min positions herself in the parents' network to explain their importance to her: she is important to them, they are interested in her, therefore they are in turn important to her. This importance manifests itself twofold: in a concrete and tangible manner (they take care of me), and in a non-material, intangible manner (they think of me). They “also” care for her and think about her. Here, “also” could imply, firstly, that they care for her boyfriend and also for her. Secondly, it could mean that they are his parents, but they also care for her – as an explanation for why they are important and should be placed on the map. Thirdly, it might mean that their son cares for Seung-min and they do, too. Lastly, in light of the various kinds of support provided to Seung-min by her community in Bonn, it may suggest that, like the community members, David’s parents also provide her with comprehensive support. 5.2.4.2 Meeting regularly When elaborating on what she means by “caring”, Seung-min then explains: “hmm, well, we meet uh regularly. Well on Sun// uhm Saturdays, always (I: mhm) um and we we eat together and uh yes 137

“** sie sie kÜmmern sich um mich auch sehr hm und denken an mich sehr”.

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we tALK a lot uhuh, about what we * deh dehm did uhm uh during the past week or what we plAN to do and so on” 138. When saying that her boyfriend's parents take care of her, Seung-min talks about a collective activity that includes her boyfriend, his parents and herself. Being cared for is equated with the routinised activity of meeting on a regular basis, eating and talking. It is therefore a discussion rather than a unidirectional care relationship. The element of reciprocity is further emphasised by the frequent use of the plural subject “we”: we eat, we talk, what we did, what we are planning. This choice of words produces and establishes a group which Seung-min belongs to and in which people provide each other with the care mentioned: being part of this group means being cared for. By participating in the weekly meeting and taking part in such activities as eating and talking, each of the individuals becomes part of the “we”. The four of them meet and eat, meaning that eating together has become a ritual and an activity that creates familiarity and proximity. At the same time, it offers a framework: the table becomes their central forum, around which they share, swap and discuss ideas. Further, the topics discussed during the weekly get-together are not casual or random but follow a pattern. They tell each other what they have done during the past week and what they are planning on doing in the following one. This agenda is an including one and permits all four participants to take part in the conversation, since everyone has everyday activities they can talk about. This regular report also enables them to continuously keep track of each 138

“Hmm, also wir treffen uns ah regelmäßig. Also So// äh Samstags immer (I: mhm) hm und wir wir essen zusammen und eh ja wir UnterhALten uns sehr viel aha, darüber was wir * däh dähm die vergangene Woche ähm äh gemacht haben oder was wir vOrhaben und so weiter”.

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other's activities. After the updates, they all know what the others will be doing and can indirectly take part in one another's lives. At the end of the week, during their Saturday reunion, they can then ask and tell each other how things have gone and reflect on them together. If something important is on one person's schedule, it can also induce the others to enquire about it during the week, thus intensifying their participation in each other’s lives. This mutual periodic reporting permits them to think about each other in their everyday lives. The group situation in which things are talked about as well as the strong “intellectual” connection established by thinking about each other, and perpetuated verbally, leads to the closeness between the four people. They integrate each other and their meetings in their everyday life as a matter of course. The meetings are part of their weekly routine and need not be initiated specifically each time; the “we” calls for them intrinsically. The appointment thus becomes a binding date during which the same four members of the group regularly brief each other about past and future happenings. After the meeting they separate again into two subgroups, the two couples, which then split further into their individual members to pursue their personal daily goals in everyday life. Nevertheless, the proximity that characterises the meetings radiates beyond them into their everyday lives in the form of thoughts. They know that they are also in each other’s thoughts between the meetings. Knowing that she is being thought of regularly and often is what makes Seung-min feel cared for. This group is an important instance for Seung-min; it is a constant in her weekly schedule and a fixed space where she knows she will find people to talk to who are interested in listening. The meeting resembles a regular meeting or a phone call she might have with her own parents. Her use of the pronoun “we” when talking about

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the group shows the very close, collectively constructed relationship between the four of them. Seung-min is not a guest amongst them, although she is not officially part of the family. By thinking of her and caring for her, they actively include her in David’s family. Seung-min, in turn, plays her part in maintaining the close attachment by keeping the weekly appointment, talking about her plans and activities and listening to the others' stories. The regularity and reliability of the meetings entail mutual commitment. In this way, they coactively create a situation that might resemble a family meeting. 5.2.4.3 Closeness leads to more closeness When summarising what has led to this close connection between her and David’s parents, Seung-min mentions two main influences: David’s own close relationship with his parents and their regular meetings: “because HEE [her boyfriend] has a very uh close uh relationship ah with his parents, I could uh immediately uh totally uhm yes, ** uh get to know them better. (I: yes) mhmh and because we meet (breathes in) uhm so often” 139 . Seung-min explains the closeness between herself and the parents by the one between them and their son: one closeness permits and entails the other. He introduced her to his family, thus creating a link which then led to the formation of a group. The relationship between David and his parents being so close, it led to immediate intimacy: they got to know each other very swiftly and very well. The strong connection between David and his parents increased the speed of their bonding and the deepening of the connection. This process, which 139

“dadurch dass EER ein gAnz äh enges eh Verhältnis ah zu seinen Eltern hat, ha, so konnte ich ah sie gleich ah ganz ähm ja, ** uh näher kennenlernen. (I: ja) hmhm und dadurch, dass wir (Einatmen) uns ahm so oft treffen”.

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cannot be seen as finished yet, may move towards Seung-min’s further inclusion into the familial circle. The final sentence again reinforces the concept that the meetings create the feeling of belonging to a group, of being committed to one another. This knowing each other will inevitably grow deeper with every meeting, and since the meetings take place “so often”, Seung-min supposes it will happen particularly quickly, thus intensifying and strengthening the feeling of belonging. In this group, caring is a regular, collective and reciprocal activity. By eating and talking during established weekly meetings and by thinking about each other throughout the week, the four individuals have created and constantly perpetuate a feeling of community. Here, Seung-min actively participates in the co-creation of the community: she, too, thinks about the others and knows what is going on in their lives. 5.2.5 Evolving relationships & moving knowledge Due to her changing life circumstances, to her own move from Bonn to Hamburg and due to friends’ moves, the relationships that Seung-min mentions evolve continuously. While she is still in South Korea, the relationship to her professor provides her with initial contact with the community in Bonn. When she arrives in Germany, she no longer needs to stay in contact with the professor, and the relationships within the community become her source of discussion and support. During her time in Bonn, the community is the hub within and around which support is organised and to which it is linked. It enables Seung-min’s connection to individuals, to a particularly supportive couple, and to a whole group of people ready to provide support. When Seung-min moves from Bonn to Hamburg to study and when other friends move away from Germany, these connections evolve, as described in the following. Finally, the topic of Seung-min’s future plans becomes relevant

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here: she discusses whether and how she wants to and is supposed to move (back) to South Korea, taking with her the knowledge she has gained in Germany. 5.2.5.1 Community at a distance Upon her departure from Bonn to Hamburg, the ties that Seungmin has established with community members mutate into longdistance relationships, which she maintains although she can no longer attend the regular community meetings and actively participate in community life. Seung-min keeps in touch with the community members by talking to them over the phone about her studies and her life in Hamburg. It is not possible for the community members to participate fully in her life, since they are not in Hamburg and they are not in frequent contact. Nevertheless, they are interested in hearing how it is going. Because of their close connection before her departure, it can be assumed that they were closely involved in the decision-making process concerning the move to Hamburg. They are now interested in her life without them, which they do not know about, as opposed to her former life with them “in the community”, which they knew about. Her life in Hamburg and her studies influence her general wellbeing. By taking an interest in these factors, Seung-min's contacts show an interest in what seem to be the major topics in her current life, from their point of view if not also from hers. Because they cannot see how she is getting on at close hand, talking over the phone is a way to bridge the distance and to compensate for the impossibility of participating in her life more directly. The geographical separation and their staying in contact by telephone instead of directly and in person create a distance that also entails increased independence for Seung-min. During her time in Bonn, membership in the community implied much closer relation-

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ships and insights into her life on the other members’ part, which was additionally enhanced by the fact that she lived with another community member due to her financial straits. Now that she is in Hamburg, the community members can only gain an insight into her life if she is willing to talk about it. Seung-min is able to regulate what they know and thereby include them in her life to the extent she wishes. Of the relationships with community members, Seung-min mentions one in particular: “and uh the Scheinerts, a couple that I also got to know in thE community uh, * they are uh also professionally uh like often away on business uh in uh in Hamburg, so she she comes uh often to Hamburg and uh we have * met several times uh in Hamburg and one time uh Mr Scheinert said to me, ‘uh Seungmin, I waaant I would like to uh support you in your studies’ (I: uhuh) mh and uh yes, and uh yes I get support from from this couple also quite uh very regularly” 140. On one of their business trips to Hamburg, during which they also meet Seung-min, Mr Scheinert expresses the desire to support her in her studies and ever since the couple has been offering Seungmin “very regular support”. Their relationship is rooted in their all belonging to the community. Despite the distance, the interest the couple has in Seung-min and her studies is now sustained and expressed by their regular visits and their financial investment. 140

“und eh Scheinerts, ein Ehepaar, das ich auch in dEr Gemeinde kennen gelernt habe ähm, * sie sind ja äh beruflich äh also dienstlich äh oft unterwegs äh in äh in Hamburg, also sie sie kommt äh oft nach Hamburg und eh wir haben * mehrere Male in Hamburg ah getroffen und einmal hat äh hat Herr Scheinert mir gesagt, ‘ah Seung-min, ich möchtee ich möchte dich gern äh beim Studium unterstützen’ (I: aha) hm und äh ja, und äh ja ich bekomme von von diesem Ehepaar auch eh sehr regelmäßig Unterstützung”.

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Again, Seung-min explains that the support given to her by the couple has been offered to her of their own free will, without any request on her part. In her narrative, Seung-min quotes Mr Scheinert, who formulates the donation of money as resulting from his own keenness to help: he would be pleased to support her. The new situation of her living in Hamburg has changed the setting and the relationships. By coming to Hamburg often, though, the Scheinerts bridge the geographical distance and diminish the gap that may have otherwise arisen between them. Since Seung-min and the other members can hardly maintain the same kind of connection they had before she moved away, the relationship with the Scheinerts becomes a special one, worth mentioning in particular. The advantage of being able to meet her in person in Hamburg gives the couple the privilege of getting to know Seung-min's new environment. They can thus accompany her further in her studies and keep regular track of her progress. Additionally, they keep doing what the community did while Seung-min was in Bonn: they still support her financially to facilitate her studies. This support arises from Seung-min's having been part of and still being attached to the community, and is now prolonged by the couple coming to visit. These regular insights preserve their interest in her development and the wish to invest in her studies. The relationship between the couple and Seung-min is of a particular kind: the support which she used to receive in Bonn arose from her physically being there and in the community, her attending their meetings, knowing the other members, being a sister amongst other sisters and brothers, hence worthy of support in times of need. Now that the geographical proximity is not given any longer, the first kind of support – living together with another community member – is not applicable. The second arrangement, the monthly financial donations by the community, was rescinded after nearly a

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year. The direct bond of support between Seung-min and the community, which morally and financially connected her to the city of Bonn in various ways and to the community especially, has ceased to exist and has developed into a new kind of connection involving less regular contact but still entailing a close connection and reciprocal commitment to financial and moral support on the part of the Scheinerts, while Seung-min shares her everyday life and insights into her ongoing studies. Although Seung-min has moved from Bonn to Hamburg, she is therefore still benefiting from her contact to the community there. The contact between the community and Seung-min is kept alive by regular discussion on the telephone. Generally, the intensity of the relationships is decreasing and Seung-min has more means of controlling and adjusting it. One specific relationship has become more prominent and falls out of this pattern: by bridging the distance through visits and strengthening the tie through financial support, one couple regulates the intensity of their relationship to Seung-min and therefore stands out from the rest of the community. 5.2.5.2 Friendships at a distance Similarly, the relationship between Seung-min and Ms Choi, who is not a community member, has evolved since Seung-min’s move to Hamburg: they used to meet and talk often, whereas now they can only meet rarely: “and er yes, we me//, well we meet quite rarely, perhaps when=when I am in Bonn, then we can er, well meet once a a year or twice a year, but we we talk on the phone uhm often hm, like once a month” 141. The two of them meet – if possible (“per141

“und äh ja, wir tr//, also wir treffen uns ja ganz selten, vielleicht wenn=wenn ich in Bonn bin, dann können wir uns äh, also einmal im

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haps”, “could”) – when Seung-min is in Bonn. This implies that the regularity of their meetings is precarious. Due to the difficulties ascribable to the new distance, their way of keeping in touch has had to be adapted and has therefore changed: they now talk on the phone often. Here, “often” means once a month, which can be seen as in contrast to meeting rarely, i.e. once or twice a year. Although Seung-min has moved away from Bonn, Ms Choi is still interested in her and her future, she still wants to be kept up to date and, on her part, Seung-min is willing to keep her well-informed. In this case, the distance has changed the means of communication from live conversations to phone calls. Although the immediacy is reduced, the focus remains set on a dialogue in real time. Seung-min characterises another relationship, the one to her friend Soo-jin, as having changed due to Soo-jin’s mobility: the latter returned to Korea after they met in the community in Bonn: “Soojin is also a Korean woman, that I also met in in THAT community, but now she is back uh in Korea unfortunately.” 142 Both Seung-min and Soo-jin were in the community in Bonn and are currently not in the community any longer. “THAT community” is reconfirmed as the meeting place for Seung-min, a context in which she has met very many people who have been and are important to her. Further, the community is now characterised as a meeting place of international scale, in which Seung-min has not only met many German people, but a Korean woman, too, who has become very important to her.

im Jahr oder zweimal im Jahr treffen, aber wir wir telefonieren ähm miteinander oft (I: ja) hm, so einmal im Monat”. 142

“Soo-jin ist auch eine Koreanerin, die ich auch in in DER Gemeinde kennengelernt habe, aber sie ist leider jetzt äh in Korea zurück.”

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Seung-min characterises their backgrounds as similar, but there is one main difference: Soo-jin “is unfortunately now back in Korea” while Seung-min has stayed in Germany but also moved to another city, away from the community. By stating it the way she does (“she is currently back in Korea”), Seung-min is simultaneously saying that her friend is “not here” and is “back there”. The formulation “not here” alone would not exclude the possibility of Soo-jin coming back to Germany sooner or later. Adding “back”, however, makes the statement much more definitive: a very large distance now separates Seung-min and Soo-jin and the situation is (currently) permanent. Despite Soo-jin’s move, nevertheless, the two are still in close contact with each other: “uhm yes, well * hm we still are * uh * well in uhm in in close contact and uh but we uhm * uh we exchange uh lots of emails ah * well we very rarely talk on the phONe but we write lots of emails” 143. What Seung-min described as friendship when introducing her friend is now further characterised as being a relationship involving close contact. Their talking was described earlier as intense and involved periodic discussion. This effortless, rich dialogue equals close contact to her. Although they are no longer geographically close, Seung-min states that they are close in another way: instead of talking a lot, they now share their thoughts by writing to each other often. What Seung-min introduces with a “but” is not a devaluation of their contact but describes a change on the level of how they communicate. It is not the content that has changed, nor the intensity, but the means of communication. Although the distance makes live contact impossible and telephone conversation does not 143

“öhm ja, also * hm immer noch sind wir * ah * so in ähm in in engen Kontakt und eh aber wir ähm * äh wir tauschen eh sehr viele Emails eh* also wir telefonIEren ganz selten aber schreiben viel Emails”.

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take place either, frequent communication via email permits them to maintain the close friendship they established while they were geographically closer. Nevertheless, Seung-min expresses a fear that the intensity of these friendships may diminish: “so I am a bit afraid that * uh * the friendship with Soo-jin or with Ms Choi * also Sun-ju uhu * yes ** th, yes will become uh weak, because uh we see each other yes uh barely.” 144 Although writing and calling each other regularly may help maintain the friendship, seeing each other is still an important variable in Seun-min’s account, which, if neglected, can lead to a weakening of the relationship. Therefore, Seung-min expresses her willingness to actively cultivate her relationships with her friends: “that’s why I make a gr=great effort, to hold on to=uuh the relationship uhm uhh the connection uhh to Sun-Ju […] because as you can see, uhm, the the friendship with other uhh students or acquaintances that I got to know in Korea (breathes in loudly) mhhh uhhh, the contacts have uh nearly uh disappeared” 145. Seung-min is conscious of the fact that her former friendships and acquaintances are diminishing or even vanishing, which leads to her wanting to hold on to the ones most important to her. The explanation she has for this development is that she is in Germany and is therefore in closer touch with Germans than with Koreans: “the 144

“also ich hab nur ein bisschen Angst davor dem * äh * die Freundschaft mit Soo-jin beziehungsweise mit Frau Choi * auch Sun-ju ehe * ja ** d, ja schwach äh wird, denn ah wir sehen uns ja eh kaum.”

145

“deswegen gebe ich mir gro=große Mühe, besonders ähm ahh d=ahh die Beziehung also ähh Kontakt ähh mit Sun-ju ah festzuhalten [...] denn ah wie du siehst ähm, die die Freundschaft mit anderen ahh Studenten oder Bekannten, die ich in Korea kennen gelernt habe (Lautes Einatmen) hmm ähhh, die die Kontakte sind eh fast eh verschwunden”.

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longer I am Germany, the less contact I will have with uh Soo// for example Soo-jin and Sun-ju, who are in uh Korea, with Professor Bak too mhmh. Because I mh am only uh errr mainly in touch with uh Germans” 146 . In this explanation of hers it is not the distance between Germany and South Korea, the geographical separation, which makes it difficult to keep in touch. Rather, it is the fact that her own current focus lies on being in touch with Germans rather than with her former friends and acquaintances in Korea. Similarly, when I (as the interviewer) ask her how her relationship with Sunju is now that she is in Germany, supposing that the distance might lessen the intensity of this relationship, she does not mention the geographical separation as a hindrance to the relationship, either: I: "And how is it now that you are here and she is in South Korea?" Seung-min: "Of course, this relationship has become a bit loose, because she ma// uhm got married uh-huh and b// because she founded a family hmhm and uhm she is concentrating uhh more on h// her uh family hmhm ah than ah ah than on our friendship (laughs)" 147 . Since Seung-min’s departure from South Korea, her best friend has got married and now has children. To Seung-min these are the reasons why Sun-ju cannot invest as much as time and energy in their friendship. They do still get in touch often and swap news, but in Seung-min’s view this new situation of Sun-ju’s leads 146

“je länger ich in Deutschland bin, destoo tz weniger Kontakt äh werde ich haben mit äh Soo// zum Beispiel Soo-jin und Sun-ju, die in äh Korea ins, auch mit Professor Bak hmhm. Dadurch, dass ich hm nur eh ähh überwiegend äh viel Kontakt mit äh Deutschen * äh habe”.

147

I: “und wie ist es jetzt wo du hier bist und sie in Südkorea?” Seung-min: “natürlich ist dieese Beziehung ein bisschen locker geworden, dadurch dass sie ge// äh geheiratet hat eheh und d// dadurch dass sie ihre Familie gegründet hat hmhm und eh sie konzentriert sich eh Eher auf i// ihre äh Familie hmhm ahm als ah ah als unsere Freundschaft (lacht)”.

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to them having less time for each other, independently of the fact that they are also separated by time and distance. 5.2.5.3 Moving knowledge Finally, Seung-min’s ideas for the future are a relevant issue in her account. These play a particularly central role in the relationship between her and Ms Choi, who takes an interest in her studies and in her plans for the future: “And especially and * yes, so f//for my future. Uhuh, the key point would be yes, whether I can or will, want to stay in Germany after university, like forever, or prefer to K// uh to South Korea*” 148 . The relevant question here is about the options she has after graduating. Seung-min introduces only two possibilities: her staying in Germany forever or her going to South Korea. Staying in Germany is introduced as a possibility (“kann”), as a certainty (“werde”) and as a wish (“möchte”). In her view, the first and foremost condition required for her to stay is that she has the permission and the capability to do so. This might include bureaucratic parameters such as a residence permit, financial parameters, e.g. regular income or funding, and other determining factors such as accommodation etc. The option “werde” is a more general one, encompassing the whole scenario that will either become a reality or not. For it to become reality though, the first condition (being allowed to stay) has to be combined with another condition, which Seung-min then adds: her wanting to stay. Seungmin’s decision follows a sequence of events. Firstly, if the external premises are favourable, the scenario of staying in Germany forever can be 148

“Und vor allem und * ja, also f// für meine Zukunft. Eheh, entscheidend wäre ja, ob ich mal nach meinem Studium weiter in Deutschland, also für immer, bleiben kann oder werde, möchte oder lieber nach K// äh nach Südkorea*”.

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considered. Secondly, internal or personal premises have to be considered: whether it is actually her wish to stay in Germany. Having mentioned this second key step in the decision-making process, Seung-min then introduces the alternative scenario to staying in Germany forever: going to South Korea. This is apparently her only other possible choice. For this scenario to become reality, there are no favourable or unfavourable formal parameters: South Korea seems always to be an option, at least from an external point of view. If both options are formally possible, it is then her own personal preference that determines her choice. She characterises the choice to stay in Germany as irreversible (“für immer bleiben”), implying that she would have to stay there forever. In this passage, Seung-min creates a bifurcation in her life path, with apparently no possibility to go back. She also implicitly excludes a change in direction, e.g. moving to a third place. This bifurcation she creates is key (“entscheidend”) to her future life. For now, however, she need not take this important decision since she is still studying. However, as soon as she has finished studying, the question will be unavoidable: a decision will be necessary. Her studies can be seen as the present, while the period after that is the future (“meine Zukunft”). For the time being, she can leave the question unanswered, but it is still looming, partly because she herself is not the only one interested in knowing how the issue will be clarified. Among others, Ms Choi is also interested in her future plans and has a concrete idea as to what they should be: “mhmh * uff Because sheee * her WIsh is for me to fly uh uh back to South Korea uh uh and find a job there. Because uh ** yes, what I have studied in Ger// in in Germany is basically quite Valuable uh in Korea (I: uhuhm) mhmh. Tha// that’s why uh sHE very much hopes that uhm ** that I uhm uh in uh that I uh what I have uh learned,

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experienced, studied in Germany * uh ** yes * that I uh take it to uh to Korea and there (laughs) uhum.” 149 Ms Choi would like Seung-min to fly back to Korea. When describing her options from her own point of view, she does not speak about going back, whereas, when referring to her contact's wishes, she does. Ms Choi seems to expect this of her; it is not a possibility but more of a duty. The explanation provided by Ms Choi is that the knowledge and the experience that Seung-min has gathered in Germany would be useful in South Korea. While introducing these arguments as generally valid, independently of her own wishes (“im Grunde genommen”), Seung-min does not express her own opinion about them. She presents them as belonging to a possible objective position on the topic. Ms Choi, on the other hand, positions herself explicitly, as the wording in Seung-min’s account shows (“wünscht”, “hofft sie sehr”), and this wish of hers for Seung-min includes a clear plan, starting with a flight back to South Korea, followed by a job there. In Ms Choi’s vision, this would ultimately lead to Seung-min bringing the knowledge she acquired during her sojourn in Germany to Korea; this transference is what interests her most. The transferable knowledge includes things she has learned, experienced and studied. The scenario described here includes more than just finding a job in Korea and using the theoretical content she has studied there: actual personal experience is also crucial. The transfer would take place between “Germany” as the 149

“hmhm * uff Weil siiee * sich WÜnscht, dass ich äh ah nach Südkorea zurÜck ah ah fliege und dort eine Stelle finde. Denn ah ** ja, das was ich in Deu// in in Deutschland studiert habe, ist ja im Grunde genommen ganz NÜtzlich eh in Korea (I: aham) hmhm. Deswe// deswegen ah hofft sIE sehr, dass ähm ** dass ich ähm ah in ah da=dass ich ah was ich in Deutschland ah gelernt, erfahrn, studiert eh habe * ah ** ja* öh nach eh nach Korea äh mitnehme und dort (lacht auf) aham.”

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place of learning in a broader sense and “Korea” as the place where the knowledge is applied. Ms Choi deems it useful for Seung-min to bring this knowledge and experience to bear in practice, and Seungmin does not disagree with her, though she does not lay claim to this plan herself. Seung-min talks about the transfer of knowledge as something that is expected of her. Going (back) to South Korea and bringing with her the expertise she has gained during her time abroad may even be seen as a mission, as her duty towards South Korea. From this perspective, by staying in Germany and keeping her new knowledge to herself, she might deprive South Korea of the chance to gain from her experience and learn through her. In her account, she implies that the knowledge and experience she is accumulating in Germany is something that is seen as lacking in South Korea and therefore “quite valuable” there. If she were to go back, she would become a kind of missionary or ambassador, bringing knowledge from one country to another and representing it there. Ms Choi’s personal background of having studied the same subject as Seung-min in South Korea and worked there in the field, leads to Ms Choi’s very urgent wish. Seung-min acknowledges this but is uncertain about whether she has to fulfil it or not. Her insecurity is further expressed in her account of what might be expected of her once she is in Korea. She states that in she would be expected to put the knowledge into practice, but cannot quite find the words to describe what it actually means to implement the lessons learned and try to do there what she learnt to do in Germany. This step seems to still be too vague and distant to be expressed concretely, which shows that Seung-min has pondered a return to South Korea but has not thought through her steps after that completely. As mentioned before, her present task is to gain experience and live

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her life in Germany. She herself is not yet depicting the bifurcation on her path as imminent, but is aware that others are. After this account in which the decision about her future plans is dominated by stories about third parties' expectations (those of Ms Choi and some community members), Seung-min, when asked, then talks about her own wishes and plans: Interviewer: “And what do you wish for yourself, for s// for yourself?” Seung-min: “uh, for myself ** oh, it is very DIFFicult. Uhm, mmh, because I am * uh quite satisfied with with life, with my life in Germany. That’s why I would like to stay uh in Germany.” 150 This section presents what seems to be a dilemma. Seung-min starts by giving a general judgement of her situation: she is quite satisfied with her current situation and would like to stay. As she has mentioned, she has lived in two different cities and is apparently satisfied with her experience in both. She therefore relates her satisfaction not to a specific city but to her experiences of life in Germany in general. Staying would mean leading her current lifestyle, further fostering the connections and routines she has established and maintaining her general satisfaction with her life in Germany, which she is currently enjoying, as she often emphasises throughout the conversation. Moving away might therefore diminish her level of satisfaction. Apart from her satisfaction with her life in Germany, another reason why Seung-min would like to stay is “because of my boyfriend” 151. She expresses her wish to marry him and stay in Germany with him. At the same time, her boyfriend has 150

Interviewerin: “Und was wünscht du dir für dich, für s// für dich selber?” Seung-min: “Ah für mich selber ** hach, es ist ganz schwIErig. Ähm, hmm, denn ich bin ja *äh mit mit dem Leben, mit meinem Leben in Deutschland ganz zufrieden. Deswegen würde ich gern ah weiter in Deutschland bleiben.”

151

“wegen meines äh Freund”.

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offered to move to South Korea with her, should she wish to work there. She reports him saying: “we can uh uh go to Korea together and live there” 152. The difficulty Seung-min mentions when asked to express her own wishes for her future can be seen as arising from these differing possibilities and scenarios: Ms Choi’s plan for her to transfer her knowledge from Germany to South Korea by moving back, her own wish to stay in Germany with her boyfriend and potential future husband, her boyfriend’s offer to go and live in South Korea together. Knowing about these plans, expectations and offers makes it difficult for her to formulate an unambiguous vision for her future, although she does state a few times that her wish is to stay: “if possible, I would like to stay in Germany forever” 153. 5.3

“Living a fragmented life”: Nevena’s struggle to settle down

Nevena is a 33-year-old psychologist (B.A.), who studied postgrad psychotherapy in her country of origin in Eastern Europe and has recently started a Master’s degree in social work in Canada, where she moved with her husband four years ago. She hopes that studying will make it easier to find a job in her field. At the same time, she is also engaging in other activities that might lead to employment, such as volunteer work. When talking about the contacts who are important to her, Nevena describes a remarkably transnational circle of relationships and friends, many of whom have moved to and from different continents more than once. This leads to Nevena calling the friends an “international network”. As 152

“wir können gemeinsam nach Korea ah ah gehen und dort leben”.

153

“wenn das geht würde ich gern in Deutschland für immer in Deutschland […] bleiben“.

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Nevena describes, these people know that the current place they are living “is not the final destination. It’s just a transit”, meaning that they are actually “living in a bubble”, as she puts it. Various challenges arise from these circumstances in Nevena's everyday life, which she elaborates on during the conversation. When talking about people who are important to her, Nevena often mentions her husband, through whom she has met many of her current contacts. She states that they live an international, quite fragmented life; that she does not identify with Canadian culture and does not have many Canadian friends or acquaintances. In this situation, the relationship between her and her husband is very important to them both. They share what she describes as a stressful life of constant uncertainty concerning the future, which at the same time can be seen as freedom, as she puts it. This life in transit additionally leads to constant changes in the dynamics of her network. New mechanisms, specific to this situation they are in, have taken root. She also describes special mechanisms she uses to communicate and stay in touch with important others, important places and important ideas. These mechanisms mean a lot because Nevena currently has the feeling of not belonging anywhere and misses various things, places and activities. She also describes having had difficulties making friends and explains this by suggesting that people do not want to invest in a relationship, knowing that members of the international community are likely to leave sooner or later, or that people might already have good friends and do not feel the need to add new ones. Finally, Nevena stresses the importance of her recently started studies, since she hopes and believes they will radically change how she feels; how she relates to people and to her environment.

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5.3.1 Having an international, fragmented life When introducing herself at the beginning of the interview, Nevena does so by mentioning her place of birth and then locating herself and her husband “here”: “OK. uh, I was born in Bulgaria. I moved here with my husbaand almost four years ago. He is a researching physicist. So, uhm * I star=I=I’m a psychologist, in fact. I’ve done * psychology is my bachelor degree and then I did aah like a post-grad psychotherapy school * and, hEre, I’m doing a master in social work. (I: Uh-huh.) It’s basically to broaden my perspective of practising abroad since we’re having this international life*”. The first part of the introduction is thus marked by locations; movement between somewhere else and here, the length of time they have lived “here” and her husband's job, which caused the move. Nevena then starts talking about herself as a psychologist and about what she has studied elsewhere. The reason for her current studies is to be able to practise “abroad”. Her being a psychologist from elsewhere is therefore the backdrop to her current studies, and here the main focus is set on their careers. Her halting selfdescription: “I star=I=I’m a psychologist, in fact” contrasts with her straightforward description of her husband: “He is a researching physicist.” While it is unequivocal what he is, it is not yet or no longer clear what she is or will be. To ascertain this, Nevena has to revert to studying, to again be able to practise her profession. Nevena is “a psychologist, in fact“: her bachelor’s degree in psychology and post-grad degree in psychotherapy would normally suffice for a job as a psychologist or psychotherapist. Having joined her husband in Canada, however, she has had to change her plans by doing a master’s in social work. She integrates this new direction into her “perspective of practising abroad” and explains the change in plans as being due to their current situation of “having this international life”. It is currently not possible for her to practise as a

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psychologist in Canada, so she has to adapt to the given situation and environment to be allowed participate in it, to pursue a career of her own and to be able to work. If she (and her husband) had gone elsewhere to live, she might have been doing something different, e.g. practising as a psychologist, so the place itself influences her activity and her career greatly. Not only the place, but also the reality of having an international life influences it. Nevena does not explain here what this means, but specifies that it requires some preparation. She is now in the preparation phase, which includes broadening her perspective to adapt to whatever this life may call for. This preparation does not seem to be specific only to their life in Canada: she is broadening her perspective in general. Their life being international, they may decide to move to another country in the future, so Nevena might again encounter the same difficulties in practising. Nevena therefore depicts her master’s in social work not only as an adaptation to their life in Canada but also as a preparation for other unknown future developments. One implication linked to the “international life” that Nevena and her husband are currently living is a state or feeling of fragmentation: “So, uhm * here, life is a bit fragmented, for me, personally, because, uhm, I don’t feel that I identify a lot with the cUlture. So uhm MOST of the ffriends that I have and most of the friends that WE have together are uhm IMmigrants. (I: Uh-huh.) So I * don’t know if I have five friends that are Canadians honestly.” Nevena connects the fragmentation to her not identifying with the culture and to her and her partner having mostly “immigrant” friends and very few Canadian ones. These facts are linked to one another, although there is not a definite causality between them. She is not outright critical about this situation, but at the same time she is expressing the wish or the subtle expectation that she should or

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would like to have more friends that are Canadians; that she believes it would be appropriate for her – in her own opinion or in others’. Nevertheless, that is not the case: instead, she is living a life in which separation predominates and in which she has to apportion herself between her different contacts: the immigrant friends and the Canadian friends. The “here” she is currently living in is not a specified place (she mentions neither the city nor the country). Instead, it is defined by the fragmentation: it is where she is with her husband, where she cannot (yet) practise her actual profession, where she cannot identify with the culture and where she has mainly immigrant friends and (too) few Canadian ones. Nevena then describes another context in her life in which fragmentation or separation also plays a role: “Then, my relationships at school are…most of them are Canadians because I’m the only internAtional student, for example – the only student with international experience in my class (I: Yeah) in all my courses.” At school, where she is studying social work, Nevena does not call her contacts “friends” but “relationships”. In this context the separation is between her as a student with international experience and the others without any such experience. She is the one who is currently living an international life while her classmates are not, so she has a certain kind of knowledge (“international experience”) at her disposal, which others do not have. The demarcation line runs along the limits of their respective knowledge based on their life experience. This line cannot easily be shifted or blurred: the others simply cannot gain the experience she has, just like she cannot gain theirs. In her otherwise homogeneous class, Nevena is therefore “the odd one out”, the only “international student”, labelled as such by the institution – and also by the interview situation. Here, she adopts the label and connotes it positively: to be in this category one needs a unique characteristic: international

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experience. The pattern which can be identified here and found throughout the interview is a struggle to accept her specialness as an international student with exclusive experience gained by living an international, fragmented life – and her wish not to be different but instead to belong and relate more to her surroundings, to the class community, to “the culture” and to other, non-international people. 5.3.2 (Not) shared, meta and transnational knowledge As mentioned above, Nevena’s struggle is based on a feeling of fragmentation and of being different in a specific way: “so I feel that I’m different, for example, I feel it more at school because I’m surrounded by Canadians, and we have to talk about, uhm * things that don’t have a tradition in=in Europe in social work for example, social justice orrr * a feminist approach to something, to psychotherapy, to community interventions, to * uhm – or multi-culturalism although Europe is very multicultural. There * nobody is practising this way. So, here, ** I have to think in these terms, right? And * uhm * I=I find it a bit hard.” Nevena’s feeling is stronger in the school environment: the academic context, surrounded only by Canadians, makes her feel particularly different. As described in the following, Nevena develops an area-based/geographical approach to difference (especially in knowledge) based on two main dichotomies: Europe vs. Canada and school/academia vs. everyday life/society. She positions herself and her fellow students along the lines of these two contexts. The first issue Nevena mentions when discussing the differences she perceives at school is specific Canadian traditions in social work and its practice: some topics do not have a tradition in Canada, while they do in Europe. The way it is practised also differs between the two geographical regions. As an example, Nevena introduces

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Canada and Europe as being multicultural when it comes to their societies. Nevertheless, Canadian and European theories and practices of social work differ strongly when it comes to multiculturalism. In her opinion, while practitioners of social work “there” in Europe have not acknowledged that multiculturalism is a lived practice in society, in Canada they have. “Here” multiculturalism is a well reflected term which has accordingly been integrated into the tradition and the theoretical concepts of social work and social workers’ practice, while in Europe this has not happened. The topic of multiculturalism in the theory, tradition and practice of social work could be common to the two parts of the world Nevena draws her knowledge from, but is not, because one part of the world (Europe) has not reflected on its multiculturalism or made it explicit. For Nevena, this topic is an example of a lack of possible commonality in terms of knowledge, which makes her feel different. Nevena states that having to talk about “things that don't have a tradition in Europe in social work” is hard for her, because her knowledge of social work is based on a tradition that is not grounded “here”. She has recognised that her background knowledge is different to that taken for granted in class, leaving her isolated with her own knowledge and surrounded by their knowledge. This makes it difficult to find common ground for discussion. Moreover, the traditions that Nevena ascribes to social work in Canada lead social workers to think in specific terms. Nevena is used to thinking in terms that derive from the European tradition she has learned. Nevertheless, she has to adopt the new terms, has to think in them and use others' knowledge if she wants to participate in class discussions and if she wants to practise as a social worker in Canada. Having to change her thinking and having to reconcile these terms with the ones she already knows from

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Europe is not an easy task. The contrast or clash of these two traditions of thinking make it “a bit hard” for her and make her feel different from her fellow students at school, who only know the Canadian social work tradition and terms and cannot help her bridge the differences in perspectives and terms. Nevena's characterisation of the terms that she now has to think in also shows that she considers them as not just being theoretical approaches but as being tools to apply to concrete situations and to work with. This becomes clear when, having contrasted Canadian social work theories and approaches with those in Europe, she discusses the differences in how they are implemented and translated into practice. She seems to draw a connecting line from “talking at school” to “practising”, thus conferring great importance on the terms. Because she is surrounded by her classmates’ knowledge, Nevena seems to be having difficulty introducing her background knowledge and her meta-knowledge to class, so she does not mention this possibility. Instead, she states that she “has to think in these terms”, meaning her Canadian classmates’ ones. Questioning their established way of thinking, or putting forward her alternative ways of understanding, is not an option here. Instead, she is the one who has to adopt their terms and adjust to their way of thinking in order to try and overcome her isolation. This isolation is also due to the fact that the difficulties she has been experiencing are not being acknowledged in her class. There is no opportunity for her to describe what she has been through, so the others cannot share her experience and understand her: “I find it a bit hard also because sometimes I’m=I'm coming from a different direction than they are. I have the immigrant experience and somehow I’ve been moving from country to country. I’ve had also a hard time ADJUSTING and CONNECTING and ** they didn’t shAre this experience. (I: Uh-huh.) So, uhm ** yeah. That’s the difficult * part for me.” The “directions”

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she mentions here derive from the lived experiences she has gone through, but which they have not. Her having moved from country to country in the past has given her experience of mobility which they do not have. Metaphorically speaking, they are coming from different directions and are now meeting at a crossroad, but, because they do not know each other's background and do not share it, they cannot enjoy a dialogue on common terms. According to the account here, it is not Nevena’s own experience of mobility that has been hard for her, but the fact that her classmates have not had this experience. If they had, they would know and understand the situation she is in, which would make it easier for her. They could at least acknowledge how hard it is for her and recognise that she is coming from a different direction, but this is not the case: they are not aware of her background, do not notice the difference and do not feel the need to gain insight into her experience – at least not as much as she wishes they did. Nevena also describes her process of “adjusting and connecting” as having been hard. This process, which she describes as an experience, is not being acknowledged in class, either. As they have not shared this experience, they cannot know or understand it. Again, Nevena does not mention any alternatives to her “adjusting and connecting”. These are the only ways she has to handle the experience she is currently going through, making it a process she has had to initiate and perpetuate on her own. She calls for recognition of her efforts and acknowledgement of her difference because, since the others have not had the same experience, the only way in which common ground could be created would be by her classmates gaining an insight into her experience. To sum up, in her account, Nevena describes difficulties due to three main differences. Firstly, she perceives a difference in her and her classmates’ understanding of both the theory and practice of social work, which

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leads to her having to both identify and bridge the differences. Secondly, she feels different from her classmates due to their different experience of mobility (or immobility). Finally, the experience of adjusting and connecting once she arrived in Canada also differentiates her from them. 5.3.3 Being isolated, being special Having located the sources of her difficulties in the differences she perceives, Nevena proceeds to reflect upon this feeling of isolation and specialness: “And *3* maybe sometimes I WAnt to be different and this is, like *3* I’m always checking myself if I’m DOing this because I realise that then I put the barrier and I don’t let the others come to me because I want to feel SPEcial with my specialness, so I’ll beee * isolated right?” Her being different now changes from being an undesired side effect of Nevena's migration process and status as an immigrant, to possibly being intentionally created. In this case, the difference becomes a positive discrimination, which she can more or less purposely preserve, in order to “feel special”. Although she might sometimes enjoy feeling special, she knows that such a self-discriminating barrier of this kind would prevent people from approaching her, so she is aware of the barrier's advantages but also of its disadvantages: if “the barrier” is up, others cannot approach her. By using the metaphor of the barrier, here Nevena implies that she is the one who is in control of her degree of “isolation” versus “connection”: she can regulate when people can come to her, whereas earlier she was trying to make a connection, while the circumstances were not favourable and her classmates were not aware of her attempts. To avoid the barrier’s disadvantages, Nevena keeps checking whether she is putting it up: “So I’m constantly checking especially since I’ve started going tooo this programme IF I’m doing this.” This process is one that can

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potentially result into an endless oscillation between the two states: wanting to feel special in her specialness, Nevena constructs differences between herself and others, thus putting up a barrier. When she realises she has put up the barrier and isolated herself, she then has to deconstruct it again if she does not want to feel isolated any longer. She alone directs the process, via selfobservation and reflection. However, having addressed her making and unmaking the barrier and thereby having assumed responsibility for it and its consequences, Nevena again relativises this by mentioning a lack of curiosity on the part of her classmates: “But it’s funny. Sometimes, you know, people cannot pronounce your naaaame or they don’t remember your NAME because it’s not a Kate or aaa * something that * they knooow ** orrrr * they’re not CURIOUS about.” Nevena describes how her classmates are not able to pronounce her name or forget it because it is different to other names they are used to. Her supposition is that if they were curious enough about the background from which her name (as well as her perspective on social work) derives, they might be able to remember it. She therefore wishes them to be more interested in her. This would lead to her being recognised and appreciated in her specialness without her having to create it especially. Nevertheless, she has realised that this is not the case and does not actually expect them to be curious any longer. She has resigned to finding the situations “funny” in which her name is not pronounced correctly or is forgotten. Nevena would like to be acknowledged in her specialness, while at the same time being part of her class group. Nevertheless, there is no such possibility in her current class environment. Her not being called “Kate” or “something that they know”, leads to moments which she labels as funny, but which actually single her out. At the same time, these moments do not lead to further enquiry, to curiosity on her classmates’ part, which

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is what she would appreciate. This would mean they would acknowledge her special status while at the same time helping her feel like “a Kate” – someone whose name they know and can pronounce. Instead, they do the opposite: “So I had only one person in all these people that I’ve seen ** and we’re at least 20 in each class and sometimes I don’t have the same * colleagues in all the classes, so I have just One person asking me: ‘OH! So HOW was it for you when you did school in * a different place?’ (I: Uh-huh) ** Right? So I *3* yeah. It was a bit strange.” The indifference she encounters at school feels strange to Nevena. She emphasises the fact that this indifference is the norm: out of all the people she has seen in her many classes, only one has asked her about her previous subjective experience elsewhere. Nevena calls situations in which something annoying and unexpected happens “funny”, e.g. people cannot pronounce or remember her name. She then labels situations in which something she expects to happen does not as “strange”, e.g. people not asking her about her experiences elsewhere. Both the “funny” and the “strange” experiences can be seen as moments in which the divergence between the reality she expects and longs for, and the reality she experiences manifests itself explicitly. 5.3.3.1 Questioning the homogeneity of perceptions When I ask her to specify what she would like her classmates to be curious about, Nevena answers as follows: “So *4* I don’t know. I think it’s *3* they do=even if everything is multicultural and you see in the street people from EVERYwhere. They DO think that everyone has the same experience of reality. (I: Uh-huh) *3* So maybe * like, everyone who is in social work now, they’re supposed to * kind of get an awAreness that *3* things are DIfferent for different people. Even if I’m whIte and FEMALE and CAUCASIAN and, uhm ** middle upper class I might have a different perception of the world than

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they do. ** So theeey ** they’re not thinking about these things.” Here, she points out that multiculturalism dominates their everyday life and suggests that its omnipresence should raise her classmates’ awareness of diverging experiences of reality. Nevertheless, she notes that they still ascribe the same experience of reality (their own) to everyone, including herself. She would expect her fellow students who are in social work to gradually learn about divergences between people and their experiences. She believes that this process should automatically take place in surroundings which are so multicultural. It would lead them to generally question the homogeneity of perceptions of the world, including reflecting on their and her ways of seeing things. They do not, however, realise that although Nevena belongs to the same race, class and gender as they do, she may perceive the world in a different way to them. She believes that their social similarity is the reason for their unquestioned indifference, which she finds quite bewildering, since she would expect them to think about how people's origins and backgrounds influence their experience of the world. To her, it is clear that a different background means a different experience of reality and that it is important to be aware of this, especially when working in the field of social work. 5.3.3.2 Learning as theoretical vs. real-life journeys Nevena goes on to explain why she does not feel she is currently going through the same learning process as her classmates: “So, for example, when I started the programme they said * ‘We want you to be CHALLENGED. We want you to be SHAKEN. We want you to have the wow experiences.’ (I: Uh-huh.) And I didn’t have them […] because, in a way, I’ve BEen through something that they are TALKING about. I had the father that was a migrant workerr abroad. I did the immigrant experience, I haddd, uh like, the humiliating

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conversation at the embasssssy asking you questions that are somehow inappropriate, RIGHT? […] I’m happy they’re having this experience but * it’sss * not something that I’m sharing with them right now.” When she enrolled in the course, Nevena was told she was going to have experiences that would provoke disruptive processes of learning. This process has not taken place because she has already had the insights she was supposed to gain through studying. The teaching at school cannot “challenge” or “shake” her, because she has already had first-hand experience: she has been through the situations which her fellow students of social work are learning about, e.g. migration and critical situations in bureaucratic institutions, and she has sensed their consequences. This means that she knows about the situations themselves and about people's possible feelings, e.g. of inappropriateness, in those situations. Nothing she hears in class is surprising because it is not new to her. She not only has the theoretical knowledge her classmates have gained, but has actually experienced the situations the others in her class can only experience indirectly or talk about. She approves of their now learning what they are expected to know to work as a social worker. But it is not a learning process she can share, so they currently cannot learn together. What is more, their studying these things in theory (talking about them) is not the same as personally going through them, as she has done. Here, Nevena distinguishes between two types of learning and experiencing: gaining knowledge theoretically versus gaining it through personal experience. In order to accumulate knowledge, one has to be exposed to theories, methods, discussions, emotions, second-hand narratives, but also – especially – to real-life situations. She contrasts her classmates' way of thinking about difficult or taboo topics such as violence, discrimination or racism with her own personal experience and reflection upon them to explain why

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she is not deeply affected by what they are being exposed to now in class: “So, in a way, I got to be exposed to more things than they are. So maybe that’s why, for me, it’s not * I’m not in awe because I’m having this type of conversation or I’m THINKING about these things that people usually don’t want to think about VIOLENCE, about how other people feel, about discrimiNAtion or RAcism or… (I: Uh-huh) Yeah. So I think this is the point I=where we’re not on the same page, but I’m…I’m working on * kind of ** looking at where they’re coming from as well.” Nevena’s previous exposure to various difficult situations has heightened her perception of how people feel in certain moments, which may otherwise not be commonplace. She can relate to critical topics such as violence, discrimination and racism, having been exposed to them in person. To her, not being “on the same page” is the result of these different paths she and her classmates have come down. She is reinforcing the point made earlier: that different experiences lead to different forms of knowledge, making it difficult for her to learn from conversations in class. Nevena also points out that she does not always do her best to learn from them, either; that she sometimes does not do what she would expect of her classmates and take into consideration the other person's provenience and point of view. This is not obvious; it does not happen automatically, so she is “working on” it. By “looking at where they're coming from”, Nevena may be able to learn something about how they see things, how they think about theory and how they collected and developed the knowledge they have. She will be doing her bit in trying to bridge their perspectives despite their differences. By looking at and understanding where they come from, Nevena might theoretically be able to participate more in class discussion. She thereby creates common ground as a basis for this, while at the same time still having a head start on various

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topics she mentions, due to her own experience and background. Following this line of thought, Nevena and her classmates cannot be on the same page, which reinforces and explains the statement at the very beginning of the whole sequence (see above): “so I feel that I’m different, for example, I feel it more at school”. Still, by also embracing her classmates’ perspectives, Nevena is contributing to the mutual understanding she wishes for, especially in class. 5.3.4 Incompatibility with the system Before she started her course, it took Nevena quite a long time and effort to understand what was necessary for her to be able to practise in her profession. She describes the difficulties she encountered when searching for information on how to qualify for a job in her field in Canada: there were no institutions she could resort to and she therefore often had to revert to personal connections to understand the necessary procedures. Before arriving in Canada, Nevena had a clear idea of how things would work out for her: “I came with a pre-conceived idea that I am a…I’m a person who has a career. […] I=Like, I have some working experience. I can function in English; I can, you know, see clients in English.” She hoped and expected to be able to start working again quickly, since she believed she had the necessary requirements. She soon found out that this was not the case, however. The idea she had was based on her experience until then and on her own perception of herself as a “person who has a career”. On moving to Canada, Nevena imagined that this and the fact that she could speak English well enough to practise in it would enable her to keep working just as she had done until then. She assumed that the system would recognise her knowledge and support her in using it as soon as possible, but it did not: “But when I arrived here it wasss * the SYstem wouldn’t let me do my JOB, so I couldn’t practise as

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a=psychotherapist or as a psychologist because the laws are different and this is what happens everywhere I guess. But for me to get into the system means that I have to do * a Canadian school.” Her original expectations of the new environment were clearly not met. The “SYstem” interferes with her intentions and actively hinders her from doing what she should be doing: “her job”. In her view, she could carry on her profession anywhere, as long as she functioned in the language of the environment to communicate with her clients. Instead, the system, in the form of laws, constitutes a barrier between her and her practice. The laws being “different” shows that they are not what she thought, hoped and wishes they were like. They impede the realisation of her original plans and abruptly and unexpectedly bring her career to a halt. Nevena is obliged to acknowledge that her skills are not recognised as such in the new environment, so she will not be allowed to work at any time soon, and that her plans are incompatible with the system. Nevena then states that “this is what happens everywhere”, indicating that she now knows she could have had an experience of this kind anywhere. Now, having experienced this kind of rejection from the system once, she is more conscious of possible difficulties in entering the job market elsewhere, as shown in the following section. Nevena's and her husband's internationally oriented life includes relatively spontaneous trips and relocations induced by job offers or attempts to find work. At one point shortly after they initially arrive in Canada, Nevena's husband's job leads them to move to the Danish capital Copenhagen, a city which neither of them was linked to before: “Uhm* he just went to work with someone ** as uhm it was in his process of looking for his next job. (I: Uh-huh.) So I just joined him hoping * that I will understand what I want to do there or at least I’d get the feeling how easy it is for me to work there.” Her husband’s working with someone while “looking for his next

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job” justifies a break from their then place of residence and a migration to a new country. Since Nevena's husband was in the process of orienting himself, she took the opportunity to understand what she wanted to do herself, too. She especially wanted to get a feeling for how easy it might be for her to work there. If they had both found something appealing to do there, they might have stayed. During that phase and in that situation, their possible future directions were diverse and undefined. Finally, they moved back to Canada and decided to stay there. However, what is also relevant here is Nevena’s comment that she had hoped to get a feeling for how easy it might be for her to work in Copenhagen. Nevena is implying that there, too, there may be laws increasing the complexity of her finding a job or working. Unlike the time she departed for Canada, this time upon departure Nevena refrained from forming clear ideas or expectations of what she wanted to do there. Instead, she decided to go along without preconceived ideas and find out more about the system there. Evidently, her experience in Canada influenced her approach to the following move. 5.3.4.1 Complying with the requirements Back in Canada, Nevena keeps working on being accepted in the system: “[…] for me to get into the system means that I have to do * a Canadian school. So, * actually, what I did was to * uhm see clients for free for almost two years. I did a VOlunteering ** thing at a counselling agency. This is how I got my Canadian experience. This is what they want and uhm * Canadian references.” Getting “into the system” is necessary for Nevena to be able to work as a psychologist or psychotherapist in Canada. The path she has worked out is “to do a Canadian school” having volunteered for two years at a counselling agency. These two major prerequisites will

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then hopefully allow her to become part of the system because she will have the indispensable “Canadian experience” and schooling. The Canadian school and the Canadian references will allow her to work in a Canadian context. The origin of the schooling and of the references are therefore crucial: her schooling and her work experience in another country are not recognised as homologous and cannot be accepted as the key to enter the system. Nevena does not explicitly mention the entity that decides which conditions must be met for her to practise in Canada. However, her account shows that there are strict but not necessarily transparent standards and processes which she needs to know and comply with to be able to work again. Before arriving in Canada, Nevena had worked in her field and felt ready also to practise abroad. Since the Canadian system does not recognise her knowledge, however, she has to go through extra schooling and invest more time and money to appease the entity with the power to recognise her skills. In this system, she has no choice but to yield to “what they want” and to do what “I have to do”. 5.3.4.2 Losing capital to settle in The schooling and volunteering that Nevena has to complete take up a lot of resources. Instead of being able to start working upon her arrival to Canada, Nevena first has to invest time and money to gain access to the system. She has to interrupt her career for at least two years. In addition, during this time she has no income. The adjustment to the system therefore implies a double loss of capital in the monetary sense, and in terms of time and of knowledge, since the knowledge she gained previously is neither formally recognised nor informally acknowledged in her school environment (see above). In her account, going to university is therefore not regarded as a net gain in capital or as added value. Instead, it represents a

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time-consuming, costly occupation required for her to be able to achieve her actual aims. Although the resources spent on schooling therefore seem wasted, Nevena still complies with the terms, because this is the only path that will lead to permission to do her job. In this context, the expression “This is how I got my Canadian experience” can mean the experience necessary for Nevena to work in Canada, including formal requirements such as volunteering and studying in Canada. At the same time, it may also be an expression she uses to encompass the larger procedure of understanding the laws and requirements, accepting and adapting to them, looking for people and institutions who could provide her with the necessary information and finally collecting all the experience which is officially needed. Both understandings are connected to Canada as a geographical, social, juridical, bureaucratic context, which leads her to call it her “Canadian experience”. Upon her arrival in Canada, the results of Nevena’s efforts to settle down and start working were meagre, but once she had gained the “Canadian experience” of volunteering, the process became easier and she could apply for a social work course, in order to then be allowed to work: “So then I applied and everything was easier than just coming here straight from abroad, applying and ** not managing actually to do much, so it took me a bit of time.” The fact that she had come “straight from abroad” shows that there had not been much time for Nevena to prepare for her move and collect information about future steps after her immigration. It therefore took her “a bit of time” to orient herself and before her efforts could lead to the concrete result of her being allowed to study. Before arriving in Canada, she did not have access to the knowledge she needed in order to understand and become acquainted with what was awaiting her. “Well, while we were deciding this, where we want to move, if we want to stay in [Europe], If we wanna * I

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didn’t hAve all the knowledge about how things work or about how long it would take me to be able to do my JOB here, so, yeah, that’s why.” For Nevena to settle down and practise in her field, specific knowledge was and is necessary. Without this knowledge, she will not be able to carry out her plans. There is therefore a strong correlation between knowledge and settling in in a new country, including practising a profession. 5.3.5 “People come and international bubbles

go

sometimes”:

friendships

in

Apart from the difficulties she mentions which concern the obstacles she has had to overcome to work in Canada in the future, Nevena describes her hesitation when naming people who are important to her and links it to what she perceives in her social environment: “Well, there is another problem it’s weird because ** like, * here people come and go sometimes **. So, in a way, for example, I’m thinking of my friend who left and went to Beijing. I could have PUT him in the list, //I: Uh-huh// but six months ago he left.” The issue that Nevena describes as problematic is a certain fluctuation that characterises “people here”. What is troubling to her is the mobility of the people she knows. Their movement characterises the “here”, which becomes a setting in which people come and go, a place defined by mobility. Elsewhere – or in other contexts – people are not quite as mobile. This fluidity is unique to certain settings and in Nevena’s account to the unspecified “here”. This “here” may be a geographical or a social context or environment. Because of the people's toing and froing, Nevena cannot use the term “friends” when talking about them. It can only be “people” who come and go. Their fluctuation might impede stronger ties by making the relationship unstable and unreliable. Nevertheless, friendships do come about, even in this context, as shown by the

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example of her friend who has gone to Beijing, which Nevena then brings up. The friend Nevena is thinking of when describing the fluid setting left six months earlier. To Nevena, this is the reason why she has not named him yet and has not put him “on the list”. The sixmonth separation has led to his being excluded from the important contacts. Not only the separation is mentioned but also the departure, which is demarcated by the repetitious expression of his act of leaving. His departure has led her to omit him when naming her alters, because the list is actually only for contacts who are more stable, who do not come and go, who have not left or have left more recently. This not knowing who will leave when, and how long the separation will be, makes it difficult to Nevena to establish and cultivate friendships: “So it’s aaa bit hArd. Maybe that’s why people don’t want to invest a lot=emotionally because then * they get attached to someone ** and then they go AWAY and you don’t know if you’ll ever see them again (I: Yeah.) I guess.” Nevena supposes that people may not want to invest a lot emotionally because they do not want to grow attached to someone who may then leave. The possibility of a departure leads people to refrain from making friends. It is not clear who refrains from developing an attachment to others. It may be “people here” in the fluid context mentioned earlier, thus including Nevena, but it may be everyone else (i.e. the “Canadians” Nevena mentioned earlier), who refrain from investing in relationships with people who are more mobile than them. 5.3.5.1 Friendship as an investment The point Nevena makes is that “people do not want to invest a lot emotionally” because they know they might lose this investment. This reasoning is constructed as follows: people establish connections and invest emotions in this relationship which then

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becomes a friendship. If a friend leaves and they do not know whether they will see each other again, they have lost the investment. Therefore “people here” might invest in relationships, but not necessarily “a lot”, in order to be on the safe side and not to lose too much in case of a departure. People in this environment know they can make friends if they invest a lot, while at the same time knowing that they can lose a lot at any given time. Making friends becomes a risky investment, in which they can gain and lose simultaneously. This is the risk people have to take into consideration and accept if they want to make friends there. Towards the end of the sentence, the subject changes from “they” to “you”, showing that Nevena relates to what she is talking about. She too has experienced this process of befriending and “unfriending”. Actually, she is experiencing it at the moment of speaking, since she does not know when she will see her friend in Beijing again. Here, seeing each other is introduced as one of three preconditions for wanting to invest a lot in a relationship, combined with secondly knowing that the relationship will last or that one will see each other again at some time. This last precondition is what seems to be relevant to the friendship Nevena has in mind, since the other two are not given. She has not listed the person as one of her current important contacts because they do not see each other often and because she does not know whether the friendship will last, but she still hopes they will see each other again at some time. 5.3.5.2 “Important encounters”, meeting and talking When asked about the current importance of the friend abroad, Nevena starts by telling the story of how they met and how their relationship became a friendship: “he WAS my husband’s officemate but, somehow, WE became friEnds to the point that I would talk to him or he would talk to me //I: Uh-huh// more than he would

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go and talk to my husband. (I: Uh-huh.) So, uhm * we…we have many * like, encounters that were important.” Like various other acquaintances of hers, she has met this person through her husband, or rather through her husband's job as a researcher. It becomes clear that she attributes the fluidity and unreliability of contacts which she problematised earlier to the context of researchers who often move from one place to another without spending a long time anywhere. Talking plays a large role in the process of this friendship. Her approaching him and his approaching her to talk (more even than to her husband), becomes a main characteristic of their friendship. The talks are memorable and significant to her. Their friendship is based on these talks, which Nevena recalls as “encounters”. Nevena speaks for both herself and her friend when she says “we have many […] encounters”. These intense past encounters become the element that joins them, and are a memory she still cherishes. Their memories connect them to date and appear to serve as a basis for what she can call friendship even now, after six months without seeing each other and without the possibility of simply “coming”/ ”going to” each other to talk. 5.3.5.3 Break in friendship This possibility of visiting one another to talk is what made the relationship precious and important. The two friends were there for each other at any given time: “And whenever things would go BAD, he would come to talk to ME and we always keep in TOUCH. And if I will ever move to CHIna * he will be THEre.” Nevena was the person her friend turned to with his worries. She was his confidante, the person he would “come to”. The combined act of seeing each other and talking provided the necessary proximity for their friendship, and mutual support was the consequence. Now that these preconditions are not given, they cannot continue their “important

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encounters” and have to make do without somehow. Nevena states that they “always keep in TOUCH”, thus trying to maintain the statement that the friendship is still based on discussion. Nevertheless, the break attributable to his departure can also be seen from this sentence. Before his move to China, she was his port of call; they would call on and consult with each other. Now they “always keep in touch”. Although their friendship is still reciprocal (“we”), it is less intense and shows that the attachment may be waning and the friendship may be losing its intensity. The process Nevena described earlier, of investing a lot emotionally and then losing the friend one has invested in, is clearly exemplified here. 5.3.5.4 A standby friend to keep The main precondition which still enables Nevena to call theirs a friendship is her hope that they will see each other again at some time. Nevena has described theirs as a formerly intimate and important friendship that is now becoming less relevant due to their not being able to share as much as before his move to China. Now she introduces the possibility that they might find their intimacy once again if they were to be both in the same country, for example in China. If she were to follow his footsteps, she would find him already there. This certainty is the only one she still has, but it is absolute. As a mobile person, belonging to the group of mobile people she described earlier, she does not know where her own or her husband's career will take her. If they end up in China, she will already have one friend there. Then the investment made before his departure will not be lost, but might instead prove very helpful. If she should move to a new country such as China, Nevena will need support from someone who knows the environment and someone to talk to. In that case, she will already have this friend on whom she can count, in whom she has already invested a lot

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emotionally, with whom she has built a friendship which could be continued, if the external circumstances become more beneficial. In this statement, Nevena is certain that if she should move to China, he will be there. She excludes the eventuality that he may have already moved on, although this is quite probable, given their mobility and the requirements their jobs place on them. However, she does not take this scenario into consideration, as it would invalidate the third precondition for their friendship: their being able to see each other again more often, more regularly and in person; to visit each other and talk at any given time. In Nevena’s statement, the words “he will be there” may be seen as having a double meaning: her friend will not only be there physically and geographically, he will also be there for her as a reliable contact who can support her in moments of difficulty. The geographical proximity, which will then be re-established, will also enable the emotional one. “Being there” is simultaneously a localisation and the emotional characterisation of a contact. Conversely, the question can be raised of whether, for Nevena, someone who is “not there” geographically can “be there” emotionally just as well. Still based on the possibility of their reunion, Nevena proceeds by specifying her current attitude towards their relationship: “So he is definitely someone that I’mmm nOt excluding ** from my life, it's someone that I want to keep”. Although this friend is not geographically close right now, Nevena wants to keep him in her life. The expression “I am not excluding him” probably refers to the fact that she did not include him in the list of important people created at the beginning, possibly due to their geographical distance. He may be an important person who comes and goes and who is currently geographically not close enough to be included in the list at first, but who is nevertheless worthy of being kept in her life. Keeping in touch with people of this kind requires a willingness to do so. If

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Nevena did not want to keep him in her life, he would probably slip out of it, just like he slipped off the list of important people. To prevent this, she has to consciously be willing to keep him in her life. Another reason why Nevena might not have included him in the list of important people at first is that he may still important to her, but not for the reasons that were important before. Before, he was someone to talk to, now he is an investment in the future, in case she should move to China. He cannot fulfil the functions he fulfilled in Canada, but he might acquire new functions if they were to be reunited in China. Since Nevena cannot foresee what will happen, she keeps him as important but somewhat “on standby”. To conclude, Nevena’s account contains the experience of not being allowed to access the labour market in Canada as easily as she had hoped for, combined with the experience of not being able to connect with as many Canadian friends as she would have wished for. Both these experiences feel segregating to her. After a few years in this new context, she is not where she imagined or hoped she would be before moving there. She does not feel connected to the place and people. One of the reasons for this, among others, is that she does not feel she can contribute to her environment with her knowledge and experience, which she believes would also actually be quite valuable if shared with others. Her opinions, insights, knowledge and thoughts are excluded, out of what she calls a lack of curiosity, of awareness of her different background. This experience of not being let into the system is also connected to the quote at the beginning of her account: her life feels fragmented, her knowledge and background connect her to her former place of residence, but cannot be introduced and thus connected to her current one. Further, she does not expect her and her husband’s current place of residence to be their final destination. Therefore, she is having difficulties in finding a suitable place for

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herself between her former, current and possible future contexts and calls this status “fragmented”.

6

Main dimensions: beings, belongings and places

In the chapters above, I analysed the conversations with Luis Alberto, Seung-min and Nevena in depth by looking into topics or codes that proved particularly relevant in the interviews, and presented these codes by collecting them into patterns. While viewing the patterns arising from the analyses and considering the themes connecting them, I looked for understandings and practices which were superordinate to them and to which they were all connected. This led to three dimensions, which I will present in the following. The first dimension encompasses understandings and practices of “beings”, the second describes understandings and practices of “belongings”. Finally, the third dimension comprises understandings and practices connected to “places”. This chapter therefore takes up these dimensions and describes understandings and practices common amongst the interviews – including the interviews not presented in detail above – to present ways in which beings, belongings and places are present and relevant in students’ everyday lives. 6.1

“I’m a psychologist, in fact”: being an international student

As shown in the analyses of the three interviews above, the conversations with the students reveal a multitude of self-images, selfconcepts, perceptions and designations of self that entail different understandings and practices. They range from roles (e.g. being a sibling or a student), to circumstances (e.g. being lonely or poor). This section presents the main beings found in the students’ accounts of their important relationships and condenses them in order to characterise this dimension and show how the respondents link it to entities and activities which are important in their life. © The Editor(s) (if applicable) and The Author(s), under exclusive license to Springer Fachmedien Wiesbaden GmbH, part of Springer Nature 2020 A. Altissimo, Beings, Belongings and Places, Wissenschaft – Hochschule – Bildung, https://doi.org/10.1007/978-3-658-31364-7_6

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6.1.1 The (a)typical international student One of the fundamental topics present in all the narratives is being an international student. It greatly determines and shapes the respondents’ activities, roles and statuses. It is the role in which they have been addressed for the interviews, which surely also influences their accounts. The conversations show that the connotations linked to the understandings of being an international student are quite varied. At the same time, there seems to be an understanding that there is a generally valid definition of “the international student” involving a few main elements. The following describes how the interviewees frame their own and others’ being a student, and what they relate it to. The interviewees commonly refer to themselves and to others as “international students”, which shows that they have adopted the formal term ascribed to them by the institutions they are studying at into their own selfdescription. The introductions to the accounts show analogies in their structure, as exemplified by the following quotes: “I am from China and have been here for nearly three years […] And I study media science at the University of Hamburg.” 154 (Yu Yan) Another example: “I was born in Bulgaria. I moved here with my husbaand almost four years ago. […] and, hEre, I’m doing a master in social work.” (Nevena Adam) By including the three elements “country of origin”, “current location/here” and “course of studies”, students validate their identity as international students. They may also explicitly denominate themselves as such: “I am Japanese, but I * LIVE in TORONTO and I’m an=interNATIONAL student.” (Akemi Osaka) Here, too, the three items are present. In sum, in the

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accounts, the definition of being an international student requires a description of one's background. This, in turn, reveals an underlying understanding that being an international student is a specific variant of being a student. The elements listed above show that there is a common understanding of what being an international student amounts to, or at least there is the assumption that this understanding exists. The finding that a few of the interview partners state they are not “typical international students” also reinforces this. They explain that they do not fit the category by mentioning that they are too old, have been studying abroad for a long time or have a supposedly different educational history from other international students. In their accounts, the respondents compare themselves with this supposed typical international student and categorise themselves and others as typical or not: “Yeah, so I’m a full-time student, in Germany, but I’m not from Germany […] I’m not an Erasmus or uh a foreign exchange student, which is a little different I think than for mmmmost international students. . so I’m . I’m fully in the system and this is my home university not a visiting university that I will then go back to my home university somewhere else. Uhm, . . I don’t know if this is what you’re interested in but I’m uuuh non-traditional student, [...] so . I have a different . life story than I think most students . . . international or not at this stage in my career.” (Mike Davis) This again reveals a supposedly shared belief that a homogeneous type of typical or traditional international students exists and that they can be described by specific attributes related to their age, backgrounds, origin, and institutional belonging. While taking this characterisation into account, since it is one which both the respondents and this research draw upon, the following sections aim to reveal further understandings of being an international student by looking into how the respondents connote it.

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6.1.2 Understanding, celebrating, students’ practices

surviving…

International

The narratives include descriptions of various activities which can be generally related to higher education institutions: studying, going to specific places such as the canteen or the library, taking exams, talking to professors and going to student parties. Within these accounts, specific issues are then linked to being a student. One example is language issues which are experienced as impairing understanding, especially at the beginning of the time abroad: “I couldn't understand nearly any professor at the beginning, what he sAid during the lectures” 155 (Ira Szycher). Language plays an important role for understanding and communication in HEI contexts such as lectures, and is therefore also made relevant in the interviews. Learning the language takes a lot of time and effort, as another student explains: “it took me a year to learn the language, like even just to understand, […] or to make myself understood, so we have like uhm just a year like for the language, to learn, like only, so also some subject-specific uhm terminology and so on, then university started” 156 (Luis Alberto Hernandez Garcia). Language is considered necessary in order to understand and make oneself understood; not only in everyday situations in life, but also when special vocabulary is needed in specific courses. The emphasis laid on it shows that this is considered a strenuous task which 155

“ich konnte überhaupt am Anfang fast keinen Professor verstEhen, was er sAgt während den Vorlesungen” (Ira Szycher).

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“ich habe ein Jahr gebraucht um die Sprache zu lernen, also erstmal überhaupt zu verstehen, […] oder mich verständlich zu machen ein Jahr, also wir haben also äh nur ein Jahr also für die Sprache zum Lernen, also nUr gehabt, also auch n bisschen fachlichen ääh Begriffe und so weiter, dann hat die Uni angefangen” (Luis Alberto Hernandez Garcia).

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international students face if they do not master the language before their arrival. The respondents find various ways to handle this issue, e.g. language “exchanges” with tandem partners or taking intensive language courses before their departure or upon their arrival. In the interviews, language, language learning and mutual understanding are therefore found to be closely connected to being a student, in particular an international one, since they are forced to deal with this issue and it influences their everyday lives in a relevant manner. Another aspect of being an international student found in the accounts involves sharing customs and celebrations. A student from China, for example, explains how she includes her fellow students in the Mid-Autumn Festival, which is traditionally celebrated with family and friends: “I […] bought a box of moon cakes. * And I, I took it to the--um, to the, to the, to the [Higher Education Institution] and shared with my teammates […], and at night, * I chatted with my parents, * like four hours.” (Kumkum Ha) Here, Kumkum Ha describes how she deliberately chooses to involve her fellow students in the festivity by introducing them to the festival and inviting them to share the typical food. After spending time and sharing the special food with her team-mates, she then also spends time with her relatives over the telephone, thus celebrating both with her friends close by and her family far away. By sharing festivities with fellow students, as in this example, students can share traditions and memories which are dear to them. By engaging fellow students in their festivities who are geographically close as well as celebrating with their family far away, students connect their everyday life and experiences to contexts which are currently geographically more distant, thus creating translocal and transnational bridges. In general, being a student often involves learning how to do things alone, no longer receiving supervision or support from parents or

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others. Additionally, if the student is abroad, the learning process can be experienced as more demanding than if it had taken place in one's country of origin, due to the combination of a new situation and a new context, as expressed in the following quote: “it’s REALLY ABOUT survival at the end because you’re just away from your family and * you can’t just take – you cannot take anything for granted. Renting your house, where are you going to rent? Like, who is your landlord? Can you find a good place to go? Clothing, what are you going to wear? Like is it col’? And how is the winter in this new land? Like, what are you going to wear that you’re not gonna get sick? Like, all this food, what are you going to cook for yourself?” (Akemi Osaka). Food and eating also act as connecting agents, as in this quote by Nevena: “OK//alright and he’s French as well. (I: OK.) (LAUGHS) And you know the French like to EAT so we connect in this way, like, whoever likes to eat – he likes good FOOD.” (Nevena Adam) The nationality of the friend she is describing is introduced as an explanatory background for the activity that binds them: eating. Further, Nevena’s husband and their friend have their French nationality in common and Nevena herself has also lived in France. They all share a liking for French food, so their affiliation rests on their love of good food and their connection to France. These are supradyadic characteristics, which are universally valid, regardless of their current location. Their friend has recently moved far away from Canada, but their connection can be re-established at any time thanks to these commonalities. Finally, Nevena also talks about how food and sharing it can be reminiscent of home and reinforce the link to it: “she reminds me of home. She was my brother’s ex-girlfriend, so ** somehow probably she’s an intellECTual connECtion to home, family. **Uhm * when we go and we buy that STUPID thing from the POLISH store that have

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BULGARIAN labels, we share them and we ENJOY it. It’s that type of connection. (I: Uh-huh.) She is the only person who can understand the Bulgarian junk that we’re enJOYing (LAUGHS)” (Nevena Adam). Someone who acts as a reminder of such a meaningful place as home easily becomes meaningful, too. This friend reinforces Nevena’s link to home, reminding Nevena of home not only as an abstract or national concept, but also as a factual place. Her being Nevena's brother's ex-girlfriend, the two women may have spent time together at the family's house in the past. Primarily, though, this person not only reminds her of home, but can also share the same memories and rekindle them with Nevena. Together, they revive their memories of home by buying things with Bulgarian labels at the Polish store in the city they are now both in. They share them and enjoy the celebration they have created. Enjoyment is an important element in this: sharing leads to enjoyment, and enjoyment connects them to each other and at the same time to their memories of home and to home itself. The “stupid thing” which they enjoy together is probably food such as sweets or soft drinks, which can easily be shared and which remind them of home in general and of their childhood and youth in particular. Nevena deprecatingly calls it “stupid thing” and “junk”, making their celebration sound like an ordinary, consumerist everyday act. However, the celebration of their memories of home through sharing these little things actually plays a main role in their relationship, since it enables their shared enjoyment, triggers the memories and establishes the connection between the two women, and between them and “home”. Nevena calls it “junk” here, because she assumes that to someone else it would not mean anywhere near as much as it does to them. This friend “is the only person who can understand the Bulgarian junk” which is so meaningful to both of them. She is

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therefore the only one who can comprehend and genuinely share Nevena's enjoyment and take part in their common ritual. 6.1.3 “International student” as a status Further connotations of being an international student derive from the status as a student and its link to other issues such as temporariness and financial shortage. These connotations may again be attributed to students in general, but in the international students' narratives they are also connected to considerations, needs and understandings which are restricted to them as international students, especially. 6.1.3.1 What next? Temporariness, money and jobs Temporariness, for example, is linked to the students’ insecurity about their future abode, whether it is in their current country of residence, in their country of origin or elsewhere: “my future's really important because I'm in my last year. And this is, like, in the cEnter of everything I think. This is, like, right there [in the middle of the network map] * because, like, I feel like I'm in my last year. And, like, I don't have, like, a passport [from this country]. * So, like, * EIther I have to go home, or I have to try and find a job here.” (Ava Adhikari) As soon as their student status expires, the question arises as to which alternative status and therefore which laws apply to the students' new situation. The students are aware of this and mention it repeatedly when talking about future perspectives. It is a common topic, which they discuss intensively, because it influences not only their future but also their current situation: they may have to start looking for employment while studying. Just like any other student, international students may not always be sure what job they want to take up when they finish studying. However, where they want to go is also particularly relevant: “the important ques-

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tion for example uhm WHERE do I want WHERE would I like to live. In the next stage. So when I've my// uhm done my degree, then whEre do I want to go? And uh, what job job do I want to do?” 157 (Yu Yan). Here, the question as to where they imagine themselves being in the future is more relevant, preceding the question of what job they are going to do. Clear answers to either question cannot be found easily since they often interdepend and are also interrelated with other status issues such as being married, for example. Another variable connected specifically to having the status of an international student status is the importance of money. A shortage of funding can have serious consequences, such as having to leave the country and abandon their studies abroad: “After six or seven months uh uh is uh is my=uh my money not sOO much left, for me to stay in Germany.” 158 (Seung-min Won) The impact of such a lack of funds is obviously considerable and calls for action and a swift decision. Money and finances, as generally sensitive topics, can be a problem for any student who has recently moved to a new city and does not have adequate connections to fall back upon. Since their support networks may not yet be fully established, it may be difficult to know who they can rely on in situations of money shortage. Seung-min, for example, does not address her lack of funds openly; she lets it become known to the community indirectly. They then pick up the topic and come up with a solution that permits her to stay in Germany. In this religious context, poverty can be 157

“die wichtige Frage zum Beispiel ähm WO will WO möchte ich leben. Im nächstem Zeitpunkt. So wenn ich meine St// äh mein Studienabschluss gemacht habe, dann wO will ich hin? Und eh, welche Job Job möcht ich machen?” (Yu Yan).

158

“nach sechs oder sieben Monaten ah äh ist äh ist mein=eh Geld nicht sOO viel übrig, dass ich weiter in Deutschland bleiben konnte.” (Seungmin Won)

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addressed discreetly, perhaps best indirectly, and will then be alleviated by the community. It is generally a delicate matter to discuss such topics in public and can be even more challenging in a context which is still relatively unfamiliar. Further, the precariousness of the situation (e.g. having to leave unless someone provides assistance) and other parameters such as language skills may increase the threshold to addressing the topic. Another quite adverse situation can arise if an international student on a scholarship decides to change subject. In that case, the donor may decide to cancel the scholarship and the student needs to find a new source of income if they want to stay and study the topic of their choice, as in Luis Alberto’s case: “Therefore [due to changing course] I also lost myyy myyyy grant, that was the consequence, and because of that of course my studies lasted longer, (I: mh), right, because I also had to take up a job on the side, and uuuh and afterwards like became harder with time and money, like to earn.” 159 (Luis Alberto Hernandez Garcia) Again, this could happen to any student who changes subject, and again a number of students work alongside their studies to cover all their expenses. Nevertheless, these situations, common among students in general, can have more far-reaching consequences for international students, for example due to legal restrictions concerning the amount of money the students can earn or the jobs they are allowed to do or able to take on.

159

“Dadurch [durch den Studiengangwechsel] hab ich auch meinnn meinee Stipendium verloren, das war die Konsequenz, und dadurch hat sich natürlich meine Studium auch in die Länge gezogen, (I: hm) ne, weil ich dann auch nebenbei jobben musste, und äääh und danach sozusagen wurde komplizierter mit Zeit und Geld, so zu verdienen.” (Luis Alberto Hernandez Garcia)

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Bureaucratic issues and difficulties in combining studying and working are also well known to students in general, but here, too, there are specificities which the respondents identify as related to their or their friends’ being from abroad: “So people who come from uhm non-Europe// EU countries have to uhm solve lots of * uhm bureaucratic problems and she was allowed to work only ninety days a year and so when you don’t get BAföG [student grant] and so she was very stressed. Aaand now she has problems like with her course because she has to get certain credits within a certain time.” 160 (Luis Alberto Hernandez Garcia) This quote exemplifies how bureaucratic regulations influence students’ lives, for example by allowing them to work more or less, and the particular consequences they have on international students: although they may need to work more to earn enough money to finance their studies, they are allowed to work very little – much less than other students. This can lead to students having to consider leaving and interrupting their studies, as in Seung-min’s case, described in the previous chapter. The international students’ accounts show they are aware of how these restrictions influence their everyday lives and how they can obstruct their plans or complicate their studies and their time abroad. The issues mentioned above are ones that most students may encounter if they have not lived on their own before going to university, and that all students can probably relate to somewhat. The 160

“Also Menschen die aus äh nichteuropä// EU-Ländern kommen müssen sehr viel* ähm bürokratische Problemen ähm lösen und die durfte auch nur neunzig Tage im Jahr arbeiten und also wenn man auch kein BAföG hat und so, da hatte sie sehr viel Stress. […] Uund jetzt hat sie auch Problemen also mit dem Studium, weil sie muss irgendwie in gewisser Zeit irgendwelche Scheine abliefern.” (Luis Alberto Hernandez Garcia)

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examples describe everyday situations in which being a student is linked to understanding and being understood, to sharing festivities and to settling in. Although these are all practices which can be seen as related to being a student in general, in the accounts certain aspects of the experiences are made relevant which link these beings as a student to aspects of internationality or transnationalism. The challenge for international students, as presented by the respondents, is not simply being a student per se, but being a student in an unknown social setting, with their established and trusted support context far away, having to learn how to care for themselves in this situation and having to deal with problems which those around them may not be aware of, e.g. difficulties in understanding and making themselves understood in everyday life, or additional bureaucratic issues related to studying abroad. 6.1.3.2 Relationship to teachers, mentors and supervisors Apart from being linked to temporal and financial resources, a student’s status is strongly linked to important others such as mentors and supervisors. In the interviews, these figures are relevant in various ways. For one thing, (former) professors and mentors may be the ones who originally bring up the idea of studying abroad, as in Seung-min’s case: “so I uhm went tooo to my professor uh and asked, uhm I would like to keep studying special education and […] he advised me t=to go to Germany uhm and to study there.” 161 (Seung-min Won) The professor's recommendation inspires her to think about pursuing her studies in Germany. Her wish to keep studying special education leads her to seek advice, which in turn 161

“da bin ich ähm äh zuuu zu meinem Professor hm gegangen und gefragt, ahm ich möchte weiter Sonderpädagogik studieren und […] er hat mir empfohlen na=nach Deutschland äh zu gehen und dort zu studieren.” (Seung-min Won)

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initiates the process that has led Seung-min to study abroad. The students' sources of information include professors or other mentors, fellow students, family members or friends. They create and personify the connection between the students' former and present educational career. Professors can also have a supportive function as someone who supervises and advises students during their education: “my professor in my undergraduate. […] she's important, maybe because she's the, * she's the one that keep encouraging me * after many years of graduation. […] she had stronger belief in mE rather than myself. * It's like she really believed I could do wEll * in academic study as well as in the carEErs.” (Kumkum Ha) In this example, the professor's belief in the student helps her confront her own doubts about her career. When it comes to taking decisions about the future, professors or other older people are sometimes asked for or give advice which influences the students' decisions, or support them in their plans. This role as someone other than the students' family and relatives, and as someone who has an insight into their academic careers, is often linked to the students also being international students. These elders have an overview and an insight into the specific requirements and questions that can arise in the students' situation. Seung-min’s acquaintance, Ms Choi, for example, expects Seung-min to apply her knowledge in her country of origin: “[she would like me] to uhm uh go bAck to South Korea uh uh and get a job there. Because uh ** yes, what I studied in Ge// in in Germany is actually quite useful uh in Korea” 162 (Seung-min Won). The students' currently being abroad becomes relevant since 162

“[sie wünscht sich] dass ich äh ah nach Südkorea zurÜck ah ah fliege und dort eine Stelle finde. Denn ah ** ja, das was ich in Deu// in in Deutschland studiert habe, ist ja im Grunde genommen ganz NÜtzlich eh in Korea” (Seung-min Won).

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the supervisors, professors, mentors or elders in general relate to it in various ways and include the students' current situation in life in their opinions and advice. The difference in status lends substance to the supervisors' and mentors' opinions in the matters in question. All in all, these “elders and betters” can provide valuable advice in specific situations and are also important due to the role they play in the students’ mobility and due to what they represent to the students. 6.1.4 Being lonely Having been invited to describe contacts and entities that are important to them, the respondents discuss their connections and reflect upon them. Their current situation is influenced by these connections, the people and things they interact with, how they interact, the impressions they gain of their environment and the prospects they have. In some cases, loneliness becomes an issue and in others it is fended off in various ways, for example by being part of a group (see also Sections 6.2 and 7.2) or by establishing meaningful connections to specific people. The size of their network is an issue the respondents reflect upon, especially if they believe they have fewer friends than most others: “as you can see, these are not many people * buuut still I like it as it is” 163 (Agnieszka Kowalczyk). Nevertheless, even though it is often made relevant in the accounts, the size of the networks actually does not influence the students' satisfaction with them: students express contentment with having few friends, especially if it is by choice: “I like to keep closer friends, * few, few closer friends * than a lot of distant friends.” (Paula Phillips) In this case, the deliberate decision of 163

“wie du siehst das sind nicht viele Leute * abeeer trotzdem gefällt mir das so” (Agnieszka Kowalczyk).

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reducing their network to closer, important alters leads to contentment. On the other hand, having a large number of friends does not necessarily increase their satisfaction; it is Luis Alberto, who has many friends, who states that “loneliness threatens everyone somehow” 164 (Luis Alberto Hernandez Garcia). Nevena, in turn, realises during the interview that “actually there are SO many people that I connect with and that I should stop COMPLAINING that I don’t have enough friends.” (Nevena Adam). At the same time, she realises that the reason for her feeling that she does not have enough friends is that “All these relationships are a bit fragmented” (Nevena Adam). It is therefore not the low number of friends which leads to Nevena’s feeling somewhat isolated, but the general fragmentation in her current life. The following section discusses the topics of isolation and loneliness by exploring how international students deal with them in their everyday lives. 6.1.4.1 Being geographically lonely In the accounts, loneliness is connected to geographical distance. Students describe having left friends behind, far away and in other countries: “all my friends stayed in Poland” 165 (Agnieszka Kowalczyk). This leads to a feeling of missing important people in everyday life, connected to the notion of a separation due to being in different countries, on different continents, in different parts of the world, e.g. “besides, I miss my Peruvian friends very much” 166 (Luis Alberto Hernandez Garcia). The friends are not here – or 164

“Einsamkeit bedroht alle Menschen irgendwie” (Luis Alberto Hernandez Garcia).

165

“alle meine Freunde sind in Polen geblieben” (Agnieszka Kowalczyk).

166

“sonst vermiss ich sehr stark meine peruvianischen Freunde” (Luis Alberto Hernandez Garcia).

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rather, the respondents are not there. As seen in the following statement, their not being close can be understood in various ways: “they [Peruvian friends] are currently not here” 167 (Luis Alberto Hernandez Garcia). The “here” in the quote could mean “on the map”, because the respondent is placing the important others on the map at this moment in the interview, but could also be understood geographically and emotionally. The consequence of the friends’ not being “here” geographically is that their importance is waning, the friends are becoming emotionally more distant, and they can therefore no longer belong to the important contacts worth placing on the map. At least, they can no longer be awarded the position they used to occupy when they were geographically closer (see 6.1.5: Being a (best) friend). Both the distance and the time spent far away from their important contacts influence how the students perceive their friendships. Being abroad becomes connected to not being close to former friends, to having left friends behind and to missing important people. Although the students may have various new friends in their current country of residence, the loss of long-term friends is a prominent issue. Being abroad implies a situation which endangers long-term friendships and can entail a specific kind of loneliness: one in which the students do have friends but in which they miss certain long-term relationships which they perceive as more profound: “there are also a few questions * which I would discuss with friends in Peru perhaps and I cannot” 168 (Luis Alberto Hernandez Garcia). Here, missing the chance to discuss some topics is connected to the fact that these 167

“die [peruvianischen Freunde] sind jetzt in diese Moment nicht da” (Luis Alberto Hernandez Garcia).

168

“es gibt auch ein paar Fragen * die ich vielleicht mit ein paar Freunde also in Peru besprechen würde und das kann ich nIcht” (Luis Alberto Hernandez Garcia).

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friends are elsewhere, too far away to discuss important matters. This does not necessarily lead to loneliness, but it does mean that the students may not be able to talk about everything they would like to. Finally, being geographically lonely is also related to a kind of relationship that can be called “latent”: some friendships are currently not active due to the distance or the lack of time: “there is this spatial difference. I am [here], I don’t see them very often, that’s why some of the things that happened to me I don’t talk with=not with her […] then I tend to speak with the best friends hERE instead. They can understand me better. But, yes, she is she always remains a good friend” 169 (Yu Yan). These “latent” friendships or relationships are retrievable ones: what has become a simple relationship or a less important friendship could go back to being a good, close one (see 5.3: Nevena’s case). Geographical loneliness is consequently also linked to relationships which are lying dormant and which could hypothetically dispel the loneliness by being revived at any time. 6.1.4.2

Being lonely together

Various students frequent other international students or people they perceive as being in the same or a similar situation as them. Some see this contact as a way to try to overcome loneliness, although they do not consider it efficient: “you are constantly amongst foreigners or amongst even * people who come from other federal states and from other webs of relationships. It's quite 169

“es gibt diese räumliche Unterschied. Ich bin [hier], ich sehe die nicht so oft, deswegen manche Sachen mir passiert sind, dann rede ich mit=nICHT mit ihr […] Ich rede dann eher mit die beste Freundinnen hIER. Die können mich besser verstehen. Aber, ja sie ist, sie bleibt immer eine gute Freundin” (Yu Yan).

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complicated” 170 (Luis Alberto Hernandez Garcia). Luis Alberto would actually rather get to know Hamburgers, but experiences difficulties in doing so. Instead, it is easier for him to connect to other international students, especially compatriots. These connections are also supported and enhanced by others: “as a Peruvian, you are constantly point to=pointed out to each other// oh look he is from Peru, too” 171 (Luis Alberto Hernandez Garcia). This selfreferentiality of the group of international people is connoted quite negatively amongst the international students themselves. They express a desire to avoid meeting other foreigners. For example, Seung-min, as discussed in the previous chapter, believes it is more beneficial for her aims to get to know Germans, instead. Like her, other international students consider a specific tendency to mingle solely or mainly with other internationals to be a catalyst for isolation and therefore expressly avoid these groups. There seems to be a general belief that international students may, should or should not interact amongst each other, and various respondents position themselves along these lines. If the belief prevails that international students should prefer non-internationals, then knowing other international students does not count as having enough friends, as shown by Luis Alberto's interview, and the students may feel lonely although they have various contacts and acquaintances. Therefore, loneliness is strongly linked to the convictions the students have about how they should socialise and whom they should or should not meet: international students, other people from abroad, non-internationals and/or locals. 170

“du bist immer ständig unter Ausländern oder unter selbst * Leute die aus anderen Bundesländer und aus anderen Beziehungsnetzen kommen. Es ist ziemlich kompliziert” (Luis Alberto Hernandez Garcia).

171

“als Peruvianer wird man immer auf d=aufeinander// ach guck mal der ist auch aus Peru” (Luis Alberto Hernandez Garcia).

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Finally, the notion of being lonely, as found in the international students’ accounts, also links to the aforementioned constant turnover in the group of international students, as described by Nevena: “I don’t have a lot of CONNECTION with them [a group organised by international students] also because they TEND to CHANGE all the TIME” (Nevena Adam). In this case, the direct consequence of being an international student is more shallow relationships with international peers, due to an awareness of the connections' transitory nature. Here, loneliness is described as a result of the high fluctuation amongst international students. 6.1.4.3 Being lonely in partnerships International students in a relationship often mention their partner as one of the most important others and as the person who helps them overcome difficult times, for example loneliness, especially at the beginning of their time abroad: “it is thanks to him that I did not go home after my first month in Germany […] without him I would not have managed!” 172 (Ira Szycher) The partner becomes an anchor in the new place of residence and is an incentive to cope with the still unfamiliar situation. Partners are an anchor not only in an emotional and motivational sense, but also in a pragmatic sense: “without my boyfriend ** it would be much more complicated here […] at the beginning for example I could not speak an/ any German […] I would NEver manage here […] He has, he filled out all ** all the documents with me.” 173 (Agnieszka Kowalczyk) In such 172

“es ist sEIn Verdienst dass ich überhaupt nicht nach meinem ersten Monat in Deutschland nach Hause gekommen bin […] ohne ihn hätte ich das auch nicht geschafft!” (Ira Szycher)

173

“ohne meine Freund ** würde das für mich viel komplizierter sein hier […] am Anfang zum Beispiel ich könnte ga/ gar kein Deutsch sprechen

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situations the partner is someone who plays different roles and fulfils different tasks in the relationship, i.e. encourages and comforts, provides information about bureaucratic issues and about university-related procedures, and therefore becomes particularly important in the network. After some time, though, a feeling of loneliness can arise among the international students because the partner is the only important alter they can rely upon, since they have provided them with all the necessary information and support and they do not yet have other close relationships or good friends: “after a few months y/you notice of course that, well, yees * these these friendships are missing” 174 (Agnieszka Kowalczyk). What is more, a particular constellation arises if both partners rely on each other solely and are their one and only source of support in all circumstances, as in the following case: “he says I’m his only friend here […] sometimes I guess it becomes a bit uh difficult to be, you know, everything for someone […] Sometimes it puts a lot of pressure on the relationship.” (Nevena Adam). In cases like this, the partners have the feeling they are isolated together, as they rely on one person only. In other cases, instead, loneliness does not arise precisely because the partner's role in the network is so predominant but is at the same time seen as positive and constitutive, not as a fault. Taking important decisions together, for example about their future career, binds the partners to one another. Although in such situations the general situation of indecisiveness stays the same, knowing that their partner has a say helps them to endure it (see Seung-min’s case). Being there for one another and taking major […] ich würde das NIIE schaffen hier […] Er hat mich, mit mir alle ** alle Dokumente ausgefüllt.” (Agnieszka Kowalczyk) 174

“nach einigen Monaten m/ merkt mas MAN natürlich dass, also, jaa * es fehlt diese diese Freundschaften” (Agnieszka Kowalczyk).

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steps jointly therefore relates to being abroad and to the future. Partners gain in importance in general and are at times idealised, since they can hypothetically answer questions about the future: “Somehow that one true love seems to be missing for example, like wherever, if it was here in Peru or here in Germany, so that maybe the problem would be solved in one dirECtion right?” 175 (Luis Alberto Hernandez Garcia) As shown above, a partner may provide not only direction but also information, helping to solve difficulties and providing support and security. Moreover, partners involve each other in social activities, thus including one other in their environment: “They were=they are also friends of my husband's and are now mine, too.” 176 (Ira Szycher) Apart from integrating one another into groups of acquaintances, partners can also integrate one another into their respective families, thus providing each other with a strong link to their current context: “through my uhm boyfriend I got to know […] his parents and many other uhm relatives uh of his” 177 (Seung-min Won). Partnerships are therefore characterised as a relationship that can provide contacts and support in many ways, but may at the same time limit or inhibit contact to others, thus having an isolating effect.

175

“Es fehlt zum Beispiel irgendwie schon die eine RIchtige Liebe, also egal wo, wäre es hier in Peru oder hier in Deutschland, damit das Problem vielleicht in eine RICHtung gelöst wird ne?” (Luis Alberto Hernandez Garcia)

176

“Sie war=sie sind auch Freunde von meinem Mann und jetzt auch vvon mir.” (Ira Szyczer)

177

“durch meinnn meinen eh Freund, habe ich […] seine k// eltern und viele andere äh Verwandten eh von ihm […] kennengelernt” (Seungmin Won).

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Main dimensions: beings, belongings and places

6.1.4.4 Being lonely and the city The city is a dimensional unit that the students strongly identify with and it is revealing to note how it is connected to other topics in the accounts. The cities mentioned are described as places which people can live and feel comfortable in, e.g.: “Toronto is a city to, to LIve in [...] simply because it's inclusive, because one can parTICIpate” 178 (David Weyrich). The opportunity to take part in city life makes cities particularly attractive and worth living in. At the same time, the city can also be perceived as an anonymous place where people can become more or less socially isolated: “it's quite hard, yes when you are in Hamburg and like in such a big city” 179 (Luis Alberto Hernandez Garcia). In both cases, the individual students relate to the city and establish its meaning for themselves. The first description characterises the city as offering, enabling and encouraging social activity. Meeting other residents is viewed as being helpful and beneficial to the students' feeling at home. The second description depicts an inhibiting unit: the difficulty in meeting residents leads to the students feeling excluded. They have the impression that there are impenetrable, closed circles of friends to which they do not have access (see also Luis Alberto’s case). Therefore, those who are able to connect to the city experience it as facilitating bonding. But if the connection process fails for various reasons, then the city is perceived as a segregating, isolating entity. A third topical relationship registered is the one between the city, the students and the frequency with which people move to and away from it. As mentioned above, if the students perceive other 178

“Toronto is ne Stadt zum, zum LEben […] weil´s halt einfach inklusive is, weil man TEILhaben kann” (David Weyrich).

179

“das ist ziemlich hart, ja wenn man in Hamburg ist und so in so eine große Stadt” (Luis Alberto Hernandez Garcia).

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residents as coming and going quickly, a widespread phenomenon in Hamburg, for example, then they also associate fleetingness and detachment with the city itself. Especially if the people concerned are international students like them, then they see its non-binding nature as also affecting them, encouraging or increasing their nonattachment to the city (see also 5.1.2.6 and 5.3.3). 6.1.5 Being a (best) friend Friends are a particularly important category, but the use of the term turns out to be complicated: Often, my respondents first use the term “important”, instead, which I provide in my first question asking about people important to them. Gradually, they then establish their own definitions of “friend”, “good or close friend”, “best friend”, “acquaintance” and so on. The topic of “friends” is connected to most other topics in manifold ways. Being a friend can change over time or according to the context, and the intensity and content of the friendships are variable too. Therefore, being a friend is not a constant, but is to be considered an inconstant or temporary state which can be perpetuated as desired by both parties, transforming it into a more constant and unrestricted state. Friendship is seen as a state which counters loneliness: “I'm thanking God that I have my family and my friends, […] people to look after me while I'm here, you know, * friends so that I don't feel all lonely” (Paula Phillips). It is also seen as a relationship in which ideas and opinions are shared, enabling a common learning process: “I think the friend is also important for you because the people you get along with * and you spend a long time withs, or--so, your ideas * and your, uh, * VIEws about life and work * actually influence each other” (Kumkum Ha). Not only can different views be learned from friends, but emotions and memories can also be shared and relished, even in relationships which are not particularly close: “when

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we go and we buy that STUPID thing from the POLISH store that have BULGARIAN labels, we share them and we ENJOY it […] even if we are not alike, we have disagreements, uh ** yeah, she’s important.” (Nevena Adam). In some cases, the students have difficulties establishing whether their contacts are friends or not and may define them simply as “important”. Their not knowing them well enough, not having known them for a long time or not being in contact very often are all variables which impede an unambiguous assignment and require a specification about the processual nature of the relationship: “well this is not such a CLOSE friendship well NOT YET (laughs) in any case, because we barely know each other but still we have have close contact and uhm, well we usually talk about our studies” 180 (Agnieszka Kowalczyk). Being a best friend, meanwhile, is a more constant state. It is based on a more or less long-term relationship and seems to imply a stronger commitment. The people considered best friends are more important in general, placed closer to ego on the network map, and have a deeper insight into their lives. Especially when it comes to best friends living in the country of origin, the different parameters need to be considered more closely, since geographical distance influences this state less strongly, thus offering a non-locally restricted remedy to loneliness. As one student puts it, “She [“best friend”] will always be there no matter where I GO and where I choose to LIVE” (Nevena Adam). Best friends are often connected to the students' country of origin because they are currently located there: “Well she wAS my best friend and she still IS my best friend, althOUgh I am HEre and she in

180

“also das is keine so ENGE Freundschaft also NOCH nicht (LACHT) auf jeden Fall, weil wir uns so wenig kennen aber trotzdem haben wir sehr viel Kontakt und äh, also wir unterhalten uns dann meistens über unsere Studium” (Agnieszka Kowalczyk).

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Ukraine.” 181 (Ira Szycher) Although the past itself and past shared experiences need not be a subject of discussion, best friends connect the international student to their country of origin, thus fulfilling a bridging function and providing a social and emotional anchorage: “Since we [my best friend and I] kind of know EVerything about our families is we don’t need a lot of introduction. [...] mostly [we talk] about things that * happen in our lives, like, current things * current events. We don’t procRAstinate a lot about the past. […] We’re just, like: “HEY! What’s going on now?” (Nevena Adam). The most important item in these relationships is the opportunity to frequently discuss everyday life and commonplace matters over a long period of time: “we also talk quite * Often. (I: Mhm.) And uhmm know what * is happening in our life.” 182 (Ira Szycher) If this insight into each other's life is given, then the relationship can become very stable. In other cases, though, movements, geographical separation and consequent distances can cause a rupture in the relationship, either on one friend's part or by a tacit mutual agreement: “actually thissss * W/WAS my best friend […] this is perhaps a good example of how you lose contact when you move.” 183 (Agnieszka Kowalczyk) Moving, disintegrating relationships and geographical distance can reduce the number of opportunities to talk about important things or life in general: “[this is] one of my best friends, and he with him I have hardly any contact […] I would like to discuss lots of things with 181

“Also sie wAR meine beste Freundin und sie ISt auch immer noch meine beste Freundin, obwOHl ich hiEr bin und sie in der Ukraine.” (Ira Szycher)

182

“wir unterhalten uns auch ziemlich * OFt. (I: Mhm.) Und ähmm wissen was * in unserem Leben so statt findet.” (Ira Szycher)

183

“dassss * W/ WAR bisher meine eigentlich beste Freundin […] das ist vielleicht ein guter Beispiel dafür, dass wenn man ** umzieht verliert man Kontakt. ” (Agnieszka Kowalczyk)

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him but it’s impossible for us both” 184 (Luis Alberto Hernandez Garcia). In this case, the distance added to the time difference and to both friends' jobs and other activities lead to their not being able to talk regularly and have an ongoing discussion about their lives and what is currently important to them. In other cases, in which best friends or very good ones are in the host country, too, these people act as local roots, as shown in the following example, in which an international student is talking about an experience for which he is very grateful to his good Canadian friend: “This was like somehow the first time like a real Canadian experience, like simply being in the countryside, * with nearly, not just Canadians, that’s not true, but nearly, her aaas let’s say an original Canadian.” 185 (David Weyrich) Finally, letting go seems to be a way of dealing with the loss of friends due to moving away from one's country of origin or a former country of residence: “I miss them. * Yeah, but, * you can't, like, hold onto your friends and be like, ‘Oh, I don't want my future. I'm just going to be with my friends.’ * It's part of life.” (Paula Phillips) 6.1.6 Being a believer Religion and belief play various roles in the accounts; for instance, the idea that God can connect all the other people, since God is the one to thank for everything, as in Paula’s case. On the other hand, 184

“[das ist] einer von meine besten Freund, und der mit dem hab ich kaum Kontakt […] ich würde gerne mit dem auch viele Sachen besprechen aber ist für uns beide nicht möglich” (Luis Alberto Hernandez Garcia).

185

“Das war irgendwie so das erste Mal so ne richtig kanadische Erfahrung, halt einfach aufm Land zu sein, * mit fast, nicht nur Kanadiern, das stimmt nicht, aber eben, sie alss sag ich mal Urkanadierin.” (David Weyrich)

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religious beliefs can be a delicate subject between the students and their family members, if their religious opinions diverge: “she is simply quite cAtholic andd so I don’t even get started about it, about the Catholic Church” 186 (David Weyrich). If accepted, belief itself can be very helpful in the students' lives: “Like, see, you're living independently. So, * it's nice to * just, like, * depend on--like, * go to something when you have trouble, * hmm, something that nobody else can swallow for you, you know? […] But, sometimes, when--like, maybe when you're with your family, you feel so secure that you don't really care. * But, when you're, like, * alone, * by yourself […] it becomes important.” (Paula Phillips) Here, the situation of being alone is relevant, as it greatly enhances the student’s belief. While still living at home with her family and experiencing their support, she did not feel the need to look to another entity for support. Once she was alone abroad, however, belief became an important source of support. In this case, belief relates particularly to being an international student: from her perspective, it was God who enabled her to take part in the programme she is currently in: “God does answer my prayers, * (I: Mm-hmm.) the ones I really care about. […] I was like, "Oh, I really want to get into this programme." * I got in.” (Paula Phillips) Finally, the feeling of being a member of a religious group also links the respective person to the place where they are currently living or where their community is located. Being a believer or a religious brother/sister therefore leads to a very strong feeling of belonging, as discussed later on.

186

“sie ist halt auch sehr kathOlisch undd da fang ich dann lieber nich mit an, mit der katholischen Kirche” (David Weyrich).

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6.1.7 Families are so important because we’re far away: being a family member Ties to their relatives, parents, grandparents and siblings are among the most important relationships in the international students’ networks. They are particularly relevant in their everyday lives because they provide support in many ways, e.g. through discussion, listening, guiding and counselling. They link the international students to contexts they have spent a long period of life in and offer a certainty of belonging as they have belonged to these contexts for so long, while at the same time questioning the students’ current everyday lives. The following offers descriptions of the respective familial connections and understandings linked to them. 6.1.7.1 Being a child or grandchild Parents and grandparents are often listed as very important and relevant to the respondents' current situation. Nevertheless, their relationship is often an ambivalent one in which expectations are negotiated and understanding is challenged by various parameters. Parents and grandparents are seen as representatives of something the students used to identify with but may not identify with any longer, due to their being far away from their country of origin. This ambivalence is expressed in the following statement: “if you’re in your family you can be who you are […] and you can grow up identifying as whatever your family wAs identifying with. But if you’re away from your family * OR your nation, then you can really see what=who you are, what life is, what the world is and what your country= and another thing is you can get awAy from your family, culture, * country – and then, objectively or not, an=analyse what those are. Is my family different from others? How is my country to=in the relation to the other countries? You know, it’s like individuality, right? Like, you’re trying to BE yourself away from your

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family. You’re not a family’s * you’re not a daughter anymore; you’re a new girl now. And that process is what everybody goes through. It’s extra HARDER if you’re an international student because you’re going through so much change already.” (Akemi Osaka) This process of identification is constantly re-negotiated when grandparents or parents and their children communicate, often leading to controversies and misunderstandings: “we often argue with MUm […] perhaps you can * in Chinese families uhm, this independence from the PArents, uhm is a bit harder to accept for the parents. Yes they would like, yes with us it’s also we always stay together and that’s why it, uhm when you take a decision on your own, then you really have to uhm convince the others, otherwise it doesn’t work.” 187 (Yu Yan) While establishing or redefining their identity abroad, students may also feel a great pressure and necessity to comply with the implicit or explicit rules and expectations communicated to them by their relatives and elders: “So it’s kind of stressful because she (grandma) has SO MUCH, like, expectations […] It’s nice * to know that someone […] is beLIeving in you. But it’s also stressful because – like, I can’t let that person DOwn” (Akemi Osaka). Further, discussions about plans for the future often arise and influence these relationships. Especially towards the end of their child's or grandchild's education, relatives may constantly pose the question of where the 187

“mit MAma streite streiten wir oft […] vielleicht kann man * bei chinesischen Familien man ähm, diese UNabhängigkeit von den ELtern, eh ist ein bisschen schwer zu akzeptieren für die Eltern. Ja die möchten, ja bei uns ist auch wir bleiben immer zusammen und deswegen ist, ahm wenn man selber eine EntschEidung treffen will, dann muss man wirklich äh die anderen überzeugen, auf deine Seite holen, sonst geht es nicht.” (Yu Yan)

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students plan on living in the future. Therefore, apart from the general ambiguity that may exist on their own part, the students also have to deal with their relatives' hopes and fears regarding them and their unclear future. To prevent discussions or to keep them in check, they adopt various strategies: they either try to circumnavigate the topic or they limit the time they devote to talking to their relatives. In general, families are a very relevant topic discussed by all the respondents. The following statement sums up why this is the case, focussing on the distance as an enhancing element: “I think families are SO important, * like, the importance is emphasised because we’re far away.” (Akemi Osaka) 6.1.7.2 Being a sibling Although they assume a different role in the family than parents, siblings are also an embodiment of the connection to what respondents call “home”, since they remind them of all the things they used to do together, of their family and of a place where they grew up. The contact between the siblings “at home” and the sibling who is abroad can be perceived as not being frequent enough. This can be the students' own perception or a sibling’s reproach: “I should actually call him [younger brother] more often, he constantly complains that I don’t get in touch often enough ((light laugh)), probably because he misses his older brother, especially because he still lives at home.” 188 (David Weyrich) These reproaches can cause the students feelings of guilt, since they feel they have left their siblings behind. Younger siblings are also seen or see themselves as someone who might someday follow the elder one abroad, or 188

“den [kleiner Bruder] müsste ich eigentlich viel öfter mal anrufen, er beschwert sich immer, dass ich mich nie melde ((LEICHTES LACHEN)), weil er wahrscheinlich seinen großen Bruder doch vermisst, vor allem weil er noch zuhause lebt.” (David Weyrich)

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follow their example and leave the country. Therefore, the elder child's experience abroad is also linked to a younger sibling's future, expanding the meaning of the time they spend abroad and making it a familial venture. If they are the first person in the family to study or live abroad, they are in a special situation. 6.1.7.3 Being a girlfriend or boyfriend, wife or husband Partnership plays a major role in all the topics mentioned and is linked in a particular manner to the students’ career and family planning, self-image and expectations. They may explain their own and others' behaviours or link topics implicitly or explicitly to their gender, and patterns of heteronormativity are present throughout the interviews. Being a heterosexual couple, for example, is a relevant issue in the narratives and provides a specific, socially recognised social status: “People have difficulties thinking about us separately […] we [are] quite different people, (I: hmm) but still we like somehow always appear like a package.” 189 (David Weyrich) Couples also interact with each other: “we are also very close and * meet often. Generally, we do something together. Like all together, like I mean * the those two and those two and us.” 190 (Ira Szycher) Being married leads to a certain social status and can ensure a residence permit and a long-term, more secure perspective, which is important to some international students who may otherwise fear having to leave the current host country: “[she] also had to get 189

“Leute können sich uns nur schwer getrennt vorstellen […] wir [sind] schon sehr unterschiedliche Personen, (I: mhm) aber trotzdem kommen wir halt irgendwie so immer nur als Paket an.” (David Weyrich)

190

“wir sind auch sehr nah und * treffen uns auch oft. Generelles machen wir was zusammen. Also alle zusammen, also ich meine * die die beiden und die beiden und wir.” (Ira Szycher)

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married, in order to uhmm stabilise her situation” 191 (Luis Alberto Hernandez Garcia). Respondents attach importance to the relationships with their partners as something that influences the meaning and the course of their current and future time abroad. As an example, they take decisions together and the mobility becomes a joint venture: “It wasn’t like that one of us said ‘Oh well, I’ll stay here because of the other one!’, instead we both really wanted to stay here.” 192 (David Weyrich). Further, partners or spouses are relevant to each other by supporting each other in their intentions and because the partner is a reason for their presence, see also Nevena's case, in which they moved to Canada due to her husband's career. Nevena accepts that they are leading a fragmented, international life, and that she now has to study again in order to be able to practise her own profession. Out of consideration for his purposes, she steps back and accepts the consequences of the setback: giving up her former more prestigious job as a psychotherapist and first becoming a student again, hoping to then be able to practise as a social worker. As mentioned earlier, students who are currently not in a relationship also bring up the topic of partnership: Luis Alberto speculates that a true love would decide where he lived in the future, and Kumkum Ha expresses the desire to have someone to share everything and start her own family with: “I wish to have someone share life with me, * like I'm looking forward to, like, build up a family. * But, I haven't found the right one. […] in other ways, he's, like, maybe my future husband, * yeah.” (Kumkum Ha) 191

“[sie] musste auch heiraten, damit sie ihre Lage ähmm stabilisieren konnte” (Luis Alberto Hernandez Garcia).

192

“Es war auch nich so, dass der Eine gesagt hat: ‘NJA, ich bleib jetzt wegen dem andern da!’, sondern wir wollten wirklich beide hier bleiben.” (David Weyrich)

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Summing up, most students strongly relate their partner to their current situation, either because they have influenced their stay since the very beginning, by being the reason for the move or by being supportive, or because they are the person they share or wish to share their current experience or life with. 6.2

“It was my group of people”: belongings

Besides describing understandings of their being, the students also shed light on the kinds of belongings which are relevant in their everyday lives. One student, who works in a laboratory, provides a particularly informative explanation for this relevance. Her statement can be taken as a starting point to examine the issue of belonging more closely: “I feel like I don’t really belOng in the lab. And I think that belongingness is very important in, like, in people like us, right? Because we are international students and we have to * like, I think we’re more sensitive to connections * to other people and,* uh, like, * uhm, who, how to say – like, because we are away from family and because we are always thinking about us relation to the society. We’re more sensitive to relationship with other people and a grOup of people and, therefore, I feel more sensitive to the fact that I feel kind of uncomfortable there, so maybe that’s why.” (Akemi Osaka) Apart from introducing the idea that international students are more sensitive to connections and to relationships in general, this comment also brings up belongings to families, to society and to groups of people. It is the situation the students are in which makes them more aware of their relationships to others. Being “away from family”, for example, sensitises them for their relationship to it. Belongings, especially to groups, are a topic that is relevant in many ways: the students describe several kinds of groups which they are part of. Each group fulfils

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Main dimensions: beings, belongings and places

specific functions, providing the students with different kinds of support, as will be elaborated on in the following. 6.2.1 We share the culture and the immigrant experience One first group that can be relevant but is not necessarily always visible is the group of international students in the respondents’ current place of residence. Its relevance is connoted both positively and negatively. When explicitly speaking about groups of “international” people, the students feel the need to explain their attitude and their connection to them. Having had similar experiences, or having a similar background, provides a common ground on which students base a friendship with other international students: “[...] she’s more accessible than other people since somehow we share the culture” (Nevena Adam). Although “the culture” is not clearly delineated here, it is perceived as underlying their bond. Talking about another international student friend, Nevena explains: “we share the IMmigrant experience” (Nevena Adam). In this case it is less the country or culture of origin providing a common feature that the friendship is based upon, but rather the experience of immigrating to their current country of residence. Similarly, Akemi comments about a friend: “she has gone through something similar, too. […] I think she’s from NEPAL. She went to India and then she came here, just like me. I was in JAPAN and then I went to Malaysia and then came here. And – so we’re – both of us international students and, like, we, sometimes ** bitch about Canada.[...] we just make fun of Canada and it’s really * that’s also fun to share about unique perspectives.” (Akemi Osaka) Knowing about the things they have had to go through permits the students to empathise with their fellow international students. They share similar past emotional experiences and therefore feel they are able to relate to important periods in the others' lives and have an individual view

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on things. They also share perspectives on their current country of residence, understand one another's frustrations concerning their lives and have a specific way of dealing with it (i.e. “bitching” about it and making fun of it). As already mentioned above, bureaucratic issues and difficulties also unite the students in their belonging to an international group, since they know what it can involve and are able to relate to one another's experiences: “we both needed a VIsa to come here, for example, and we know, like, what it takes * to have this process, how long it takes, uhm the diFFicultiees, what you cannot do, what you can do.” (Nevena Adam) In these cases, belonging to the group of international students relates both to the particular situation that entails burdens and to a connection that is based specifically on these bureaucratic burdens and on having to be recognised as being international students. Precisely because they are disagreeable, such experiences and shared emotions create a common background they can relate to. The fact that they are specific to some students only – to those who can relate to them – allows these students to feel part of the group of international students. As discussed above, there is a general view that international students should keep their distance from other international students, or at least from their compatriots, in order to meet more people who can help them understand and connect to their current environment and to “settle in better”, as Seung-min puts it (see 5.2.1: Knowing Germans to settle in). At the same time, nevertheless, the students acknowledge and explain that they benefit from having international acquaintances in many ways: they can share their experiences with them, as described above; they can share the connection to the places they come from and can ask them for urgent favours in the way they are used to, as in Nevena's case; they can talk to them in their mother tongue, as in

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Seung-min's case; and are taken to places of interest by other international friends who know the city or the region. International students do not socialise exclusively with other international people, and the imperative of mingling beyond groups of international students is based more on a fear of not meeting others’ expectations about one’s social contacts than on actual realities described in the respondents’ accounts. Luis Alberto, for example, describes his group of friends in his current country of residence, Germany, as “a bit colourful, right, like half German and half like foreigners […] Germans are maybe like the * like 30, 40 percent and the rest I would say well the people who are nOt from Germany outweigh them” 193 (Luis Alberto Hernandez Garcia). This exemplifies the fact that, in practice, the networks presented are highly complex and varied, with internationals and noninternationals mingling at various times and to various degrees; belonging to a group of international students is not a category which excludes or impedes other belongings. 6.2.2 Belonging to a nation / nationality Apart from mixed groups of international and non-international acquaintances, another group which is made relevant is the students' compatriots, as previously discussed in Seung-min’s case especially. Knowing people who come from the same country as themselves provides the international students with a chance to connect to them in a different way than to others, as exemplified by the following quote by student from India: “I connect more with, like, Indian things and Indian people and stuff. [...] * So, like, when 193

“n bisschen bunt ne, so halb deutsch und halb so Ausländer [...] Deutsche sind vielleicht so die * wie 30, 40 Prozent und der Rest würd ich sagen also es überwiegt die Anzahl von Menschen die NIcht aus Deutschland kommen” (Luis Alberto Hernandez Garcia).

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I, like, talk to these people [other students from India], I feel like, okay, I feel at home. I feel like thAT's MY LIfe. […] And, like, * they feel like sort of, like, my family.” (Ava Adhikari) The easy connection with Indian things and people leads to her feeling “at home” when talking to them. Their sharing a similar background makes it easier for her to connect to these people. This perceived connection is also linked to the feeling that this is the life to which she belongs or relates. The analogy between the group of Indians and the student's own family suggests the high level of understanding and intimacy common to both groups. In this case, belonging to a certain national group is a very positive, supportive state, especially since Ava feels somewhat alienated from the life she is currently living, as expressed in the subsequent sentence: “sometimes, over here, I feel like, okay, you know, this is nOt my life. This is my secondary life, or like, this is my plan B life, or like, you know, this is * not really real.” (Ava Adhikari) Belonging to the group of Indian students and seeing them as her family gives Ava (back) the feeling that she does have a “real” life, while the one she is now living may currently feel secondary. 6.2.3 Higher education communities Another context which can provide the opportunity for students to feel they belong to a group is class communities. Terezia, for example, describes a very strong identification with her former classmates, with whom she studied for her undergraduate degree in England: “with those * I spent * four years ** in the same school […] we talked about bad and good things we, * we survived all the exams period which were very stressful event. And then we also experienced, like, nice things ** with, I don't know, at school * but then also ** outside England as well. * We ** made the effort to meet in Germany or in Czech Republic or in Slovenia.” (Terezia

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Main dimensions: beings, belongings and places

Horvat) Sharing everyday life, difficult periods and challenges, as well as positive experiences both at school and during gatherings abroad bound them together and strengthened Terezia's feeling of belonging to a class community, which she then had to leave on graduating. She is now getting acquainted with her current classmates: “these people [current classmates] I know for * three weeks or four weeks, so * you don't know what's going to happen with them.” (Terezia Horvat) Therefore, they are not placed in the circles in the network map or classified. Terezia’s explanation is that “because I just simply don't know those people, I'm not so attached to them so far”. (Terezia Horvat) Nevertheless, although they are not yet as important as other contacts, her current classmates are connected to various other alters on the map and are mentioned often in the narration, showing that they are quite relevant already but that she simply cannot yet foresee how the connections will develop: “We are starting building the relationship, I think, the friendship.” (Terezia Horvat) This example shows that the process of establishing a relationship to new classmates and being part of a class are important topics, as will be further illustrated in the following sections. In Nevena's case, not (yet) belonging to the class community is also quite a relevant topic: “I’m trying to belong to my school community, like, I’m trying to fit in and feel, like: 'OK, this is where/we're – these people, we have this interest, we should work together and see what happens'” (Nevena Adam, see also 5.3.3). In her understanding of the school community, Nevena would be able to “fit in” and have a feeling of belonging. The interest she shares with her schoolmates is the commonality that could help them work together, which in turn could affect her feeling of fitting in. Currently, though, Nevena does not have this impression and states: “I feel that I’m different, for example, I feel it more at school because I’m surrounded by Canadians, and we have to talk about,

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uhm * things that don’t have a tradition in=in Europe in social work”. (Nevena Adam). Here, Nevena characterises her school context as a group surrounding her but which she is not part of. It is bound together by a common knowledge and a tradition specific to the social work in this part of the world, not in Europe, where she comes from. When it comes to them having to discuss things she does not know due to her different background in social work, she feels different and excluded because she cannot participate. Further, Nevena's being “the only internAtional student, […] the only student with international experience in my class” (Nevena Adam) is another criterion for feeling different, since she cannot share her experiences with anyone there. As discussed in 5.3.2 ((Not) shared, meta and transnational knowledge), these conditions are not conducive to her feeling at ease in her class and school community and lead to her not participating quite as much as she would like to in class discussions. Nevena's solution to this situation is to make the best of it by listening to “what they [her classmates] have to say about things” (Nevena Adam). This approach seems to work to some degree: “And it * helps me, especially when I do group work because everyone has more, let’s say, an equal share of input” (Nevena Adam). She characterises group work as a more egalitarian setting, in which everyone is given more or less the same opportunity to contribute their ideas. This is the setting that is the most productive for her: she gets to know her classmates' opinions and can also present and discuss her own perspectives. This allows her to take up the stance of curiosity which she actually expects of her classmates, and to feel like an equal member of the group she is working with, thus creating a feeling of belonging, at least to a subgroup of the class. Another student who does not feel she belongs to a class community is Seung-min. She does mention fellow students, but they are

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Main dimensions: beings, belongings and places

“just students I only see from time to time uhm at university (I: yes) and uh, yes exchange information with” 194 (Seung-min Won). They do not play an important role in her everyday life and are only rarely relevant, i.e. when it comes to exchanging information. Nevertheless, fellow students are a potential group of contacts that Seung-min misses. She states that although she has been studying at the same university for two years, she does not have much contact to her fellow students: “I like lack uhm relationship * tooo fellow students […] I don't have any […] close relationship to one or to like uh a student” 195 (Seung-min Won). Seung-min reports that her fellow students have often offered her their help if she has any difficulties, but that she was hesitant to actually contact them: “I was always uh afraid or self-conscious about asking” 196 (Seung-min Won). Seung-min assumes responsibility for the lack of contact to her fellow students: she mentions her own fear, shyness and language difficulties as the main reasons for it. At the same time, though, she specifies that she was always mainly offered help by her fellow students, and not necessarily companionship in the form of joint activities: “their offers were are uh that uuhm uh that they can or would like to, want to uhm be available when I uh need help (I: yes) uhm, help in my studies or uh yes. Then they would like to

194

“nur so Studenten, die ich ab und zu nur äh an der Uni treffe (I: ja) und eh, ja Informationen austauschen” (Seung-min Won).

195

“mir fehlt halt äh Beziehung * zuu Mitstudenten […] ich habe noch keinen […] enge Beziehung zu einem oder zu einer ah so Studentin” (Seung-min Won).

196

“ich hatte immer eh nur Angst oder HEmmung eheh davor” (Seung-min Won).

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help me” 197 (Seung-min Won). Seung-min makes it clear that there is a group of fellow students who are willing to help if help is needed. Nevertheless, it is not offers of help which she lacks, but offers of companionship: “if they asked me 'uh Seung-min, let's got to the cinema' and so on then hm I could, well I would like to do that” 198 (Seung-min Won). She also explains that she is very open to getting to know new people and would love to have more discussion with people at university: “I would like to get to know them * uhh * because ** uhmm ** yes, because I uhm would like to hear about thEIr experiences” 199 (Seung-min Won). Not knowing fellow students means there are not enough opportunities to share ideas with them. Similarly to Nevena, who would like to deepen her discussion about her professional insights and interests, Seung-min would like to know about their academic career and gather suggestions from them: “I need their uh advice or uh information (I: uhu) uhmm about about this * this uhm uh professional field.” 200 (Seung-min Won) The difficulty in establishing a closer connection to any of her fellow students leads to her not having access to information which she is very interested 197

“ihre Angebote waren sind ah, dass ähh äh, dass siee sich für mich ah zu Verfügung ah stellen * können oder möchten, wollen ahm wenn ich ah Hilfe brauche (I: ja) ehem. Hilfe beim Studium oder eh ja. Dann möchten sie mir gerne helfen” (Seung-min Won).

198

“wenn sie mich fragen würden 'ah Seung-min, lass uns mal ma eh in Kino gehen' und so dann hm könnte ich ja, also würde ich gern machen” (Seung-min Won).

199

“ich möchte sie deswegen kennenlernen * öh * weil ** hmhm ** ja, weil ich ähm eh IHre Erfahrungen eh erfahren möchte” (Seung-min Won).

200

“ich brauche ihre ah Ratschläge oder ah Informationen (I: aha) hmhm über über diesen * dieses ähm ah Berufsfeld.” (Seung-min Won)

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Main dimensions: beings, belongings and places

in and actually needs, especially since the main reason for her studying in Germany was to gain an insight into this specific occupational field on a course that was not available in South Korea. Becoming part of a class community facilitates the dialogue which students may wish for and can provide access to information and opportunities they lack. 6.2.4 Playing football and meeting people Sports groups are mentioned as another kind of group that encompasses specific supportive elements. Such contexts additionally offer an opportunity to meet people: “Yes well, I started doing this immediately, simply because it's important to me, uhm to relAx, simply to unwind, to play football, besides you get to know a few people.” 201 (David Weyrich) Having fun together while practising their favourite sport creates a favourable atmosphere for people to socialise. The informal setting reduces inhibitions and helps them come into contact with the others. A sports group also provides a specific place they can visit regularly, knowing whom they will meet there and what to expect. At the same time, they do not have to organise meetings themselves; they can rely on the fact that those who share their interest in that sport know about the gatherings: “we just met Saturdays and Sundays I think, always meet at a certain time” 202 (David Weyrich). A further positive trait mentioned by Akemi is that a sports group can provide a structure and even guidelines for her everyday life: “they’re, like, intense * sports people: 'Be on TIME', and, like: 'Keep goinnnnng.' And: 'Work, work, work, work 201

“Ja also das hab ich direkt angefangn, einfach weil´s mir wichtig iss, ähm um zu relAxen, einfach zu entspannen, Fußball zu spieln, außerdem lernt man n paar Leute kennen.” (David Weyrich)

202

“wir ham uns einfach samstags und sonntags glaub ich, treffen sich immer zu ner gewissen Zeit” (David Weyrich).

“It was my group of people”: belongings

205

and make sure you do your workout and then you’re FIt and then you’re ready to go and then you win your RACE. Yeah. And then go back home and make sure you eat the right FOOD and make sure you maintAIn yourSEELF.' And that is kind of * hElpful to align my life * so that I’m not always, like: 'Uhhhh, my life is so DIFFICULT.' (CHUCKLES) 'Uh, my work is so difficult.' (CHUCKLES) And when I come with them, I’m, like: 'OK. Well, whatever. * This is who I am, […] STUDENT, fourth YEAR. I GOT to graDUATE and I GOT to, you know, have good gradeeees'.” (Akemi Osaka) These thoughts about her sports group describe functions which a sports group of this kind can fulfil: the group members’ expectations can have a strong regulative influence which extends to each other’s’ private lives. The clear rules for the members’ everyday life, including timekeeping, eating habits and general self-care are primarily aimed at preparing the members to win sports competitions, but here the student draws a parallel between the goals in sports and in her life in general. The coaching she undergoes for her races also helps her approach her academic career with greater ease and alleviates her feeling of leading a difficult life. Her aims (e.g. graduating) become clearer, she gains in decisiveness and comes to terms with herself and her current status or identity (“This is who I am”). In this case, Akemi’s belonging to this group helps her structure her life and establish a routine and habits, which she perceives as being supportive to her. Conversely, if someone is not involved in any sports groups, their chances of meeting people diminish. Luis Alberto comments upon the situation of a friend of his as follows: “of course she sees quite a few people m=uhm=at the gym and where she does sport * but

206

Main dimensions: beings, belongings and places

otherwise she is quite isolated.” 203 (Luis Alberto Hernandez Garcia) In this case, the gym does not offer the same opportunities to actually meet people like the groups in the examples above. Just “seeing” people at the gym does not lead to getting to know them. The level of interaction is too low to establish a relationship of any kind. Another major concern of Luis Alberto’s is that his friend may not meet any Germans otherwise, because she does not have any opportunities to do so. He then concludes that “if she well, like well does not get into a dance group or something where, you know, where she gets into some kind of community of interests, then she will barely get to know anyone” 204 (Luis Alberto Hernandez Garcia). As these examples show, not all sports are perceived as being adequate to make new friends. In the cases above, in which there are common aims, a common sports culture and clear meeting times and places, the positive by-product can be acquaintances or friendships with other people and the feeling of belonging to that specific group, even though it may just be a loose one. 6.2.5 “The dance group has a huge social function” Closely linked to the subject of belonging to a sports group is the notion of sharing a hobby with others. Luis Alberto’s statement that belonging to a dance group can offer a very good opportunity to get to know others is proven by Nevena's own experience "I=I=I realised after, it [the dance group] has a huge SOcial FUNCTION. It 203

“sie sieht natürlich sehr viele Menschen m=äm=in dem Fitnessclub und da wo sie Sport macht * aber sonst ist sie ziemlich isoliert.” (Luis Alberto Hernandez Garcia)

204

“wenn sie, also sonst, also nich in eine Tanzgruppe kommt oder so bei, keine Ahnung, wo sie irgendwelche Interessengemeinschaften kommt, dann wird sie kaum jemanden kennenlernen” (Luis Alberto Hernandez Garcia).

“It was my group of people”: belongings

207

was…again, it was – I=I was belonging to a GROup. It was my group of people. We were always people doing this thIng, doing vaCATIONS to do=in order to do this thing”. (Nevena Adam) Having moved away from her native town, Nevena also manages to pursue her dancing activities in similar groups in other cities. However, she currently has not found a group of this kind in her surroundings and misses the social function a dancing group has. She emphasises the feeling of cohesion that the group can provide, as revealed particularly in her comment that the group would even plan their vacations to accommodate their hobby. Now that she is not part of a group any longer, she clearly realises what it meant to her and what kind of belonging it enabled her to have. Another student talks about a casual meeting by amateur singers to which she is regularly invited: “she [a German-Asian friend] always does like a singing night on Wednesdays […] just uhm singing stuff, getting together, chatting and having snacks yes […] they actually are all Germans, except me […] school friends of hers and yes friends of hers or acquaintances like.” 205 (Yu Yan) This get-together is again a meeting at a fixed time in a fixed place. The people going there know each other to some extent but the group is not hermetically closed: other people are welcome and can also bring along further friends and flatmates. This group provides a quite suitable setting for her to get to know people or simply to spend leisure time with her own friends and their friends. She also mentions that most of the people in the singing group are Germans, except herself and her flatmates. It is relevant to Yu to point out that she not only mingles 205

“sie macht immer so eine Singabend am Mittwoch […] einfach hm irgendwas singen, zusammen treffen, quatschen und knabbern, was essen ja […] die sind eigentlich alle Deutsche, außer mir […] Schulkollegen von ihr oder ja Freunden von ihr oder Bekannte so.” (Yu Yan)

208

Main dimensions: beings, belongings and places

with other international students or people from abroad, but that she also regularly spends time with and chats with Germans. 6.2.6 The ever-supportive religious community Belonging to a religious community can also have quite a few positive consequences. As discussed in Seung-min’s case, for example, the members of such communities take care of one another, often provide various kinds of support in times of need and actively involve each other and other interested people in their activities. The relationships Seung-min has to the other community members are very close: “these relationships became that close ** uhh *** got that close because they ** uhm *** almost uhm made me do it (laughs) so to speak.” 206 (Seung-min Won) The enthusiasm with which the other community members have involved her in their activities is evident. She compares their approach to her fellow students' offers. The community friends’ approach is much more decisive: “Not […] 'maybe if you uh have time then uhm you we could like like do' and more like 'Let's uh er go some// somewhere' and 'let's do something together' like” 207 (Seung-min Won). The community members' explicit invitations are unambiguous and barely brook any dissent. As a result, her integration into the group is swift and strong. The belonging in this community is of a particular kind: the members call each other “sister” and “brother”, which leads to a specific cohesiveness and a feeling of being a family in a 206

“diese Beziehungen konnten deswegen so fest ** ahh *** fest werden fest sein, weil, weil sie ** hm *** mich ähm sozusagen fast gezwungen (lacht aus) haben.” (Seung-min Won)

207

“Nicht […] 'wenn du vielleicht eh Zeit hast, dann ehm kann du können wir so so machen' sondern eher in der Form 'Lass uns ah eh irgend// irgendwo hinfahren' und 'lass uns eh was gemeinsam unternehmen' und so” (Seung-min Won).

“It was my group of people”: belongings

209

metaphorical or religious sense. This, in turn, facilitates various things. As can be common in any family, the members of the community support each other in many ways: morally, emotionally, financially and by providing each other with information or contacts to important resources (see Section 5.2: Seung-min Won’s case). Seung-min benefits from this greatly and emphasises their importance: “that I met these * great people, very loving people. That, that is uhm a * yes that is the greatest thing uh, which I have experienced in Germany (I: uhu). And uhmm * uhm yes that I uhm * mhh am always mhh ** yes th=uhm always supported uh by someone, uh financed.” 208 (Seung-min Won) This kind of religious group can therefore be an important source of relief and support, by offering a specific kind of belonging based on religion, which leads the members to feel supported on various levels of their being. 6.2.7 Hanging out with a group of friends Lastly, another less function-related but also very important kind of group which students belong to is groups of friends. Simply having a group of people to feel part of is seen as being supportive. Akemi, for example, recalls the advice a friend of hers gave her after she broke up with her boyfriend: “you neeeeed to hang out with a group of people and not just one-on-one friendship.” (Akemi Osaka) She then further describes her former situation: “after the bad relationship, like, I had * like, I lost so many friends (CHUCKLES). But, uhm, this [group of seminar friends] is one of the first thing that I got back and * it’s helpful, like, group of friends” (Akemi Osaka). Following 208

“dass ich diese * großartige Menschen, ganz liebevolle Menschen kennen gelernt habe. Das, das ist ähm eine* ja das ist die größte Erfahrung ah, die ich in Deutschland gemacht habe (I: aha). Und ehmm * ähm ja, dass ich ähm * hm immer hm ** ja d=ehm immer von jemandem ah * unterstützt ah, finanziert ah werd” (Seung-min Won).

210

Main dimensions: beings, belongings and places

her friend's advice, she reconnects to the friends she had at university and finds solace in the group: “I feel comfortable […] about * having a group of friends just to * have fun and not, like, you know= intense one-to-one relationship.” (Akemi Osaka) Here, the group of friends stands for easy-going, noncommittal relationships, as opposed to one-on-one friendships based more on deep conversations. Similarly, Terezia rates a group of former schoolmates as quite important. She describes her visit to the place she calls “home home” during the summer and recalls meeting “a lot of classmates together and like we did stuff together like going, ** uhm, swimming, […] doing things for fun” (Terezia Horvat). Here, too, doing “stuff” in a group refers to spending leisure time together having fun. It is a group of people she trusts and knows very well, as she also states, and when they all meet together, they focus more on fun activities and on enjoying their time together. Nevena used to have a similar group of friends and now misses them: “We – I had a GROUP of friends. They were, you know, many people in the same situation. We would manage to go out and do something as a GROUP and here, I don’t have this thing” (Nevena Adam). She does know quite a few people but they are not interconnected: “I could put everyone together in my party…my imaginary party, but it would not lead to ANYthing else. (I: Uh-huh.) ** Because, honestly, I don’t see any of these people purSUINg connections outside my party. (I: Uh-huh.) Right. So I…I guess this is what I’m missing BELONGing to some sort of group.” (Nevena Adam) Nevena knows various people she can contact and with whom she shares specific interests. But they do not mingle and therefore do not provide her with the feeling of having a few friends who know her and know each other. She does not quite feel she belongs to a group that would exist independently of her.

“It was my group of people”: belongings

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However, Nevena does have two friends whom she contacts equally and who are also friends with one another, so she states: “we KInd of formed a group.” (Nevena Adam) She positions them simultaneously on the map and at the same distance from herself and from each other, in order to do justice to the equality within the group. What Nevena calls a group, and what the three of them maintain, could also be called a triad. When they meet or talk in pairs, they “ask about the third: ‘Did you talk to the other one? How is she? Is she OK?’” (Nevena Adam). They thus include the missing person in their conversation, re-establishing the missing link and reforming the group. Even though it is not physically united, the group is therefore intellectually and communicatively reunited. This activity of caring for the others, keeping each other updated and showing interest in the missing party reiterates their reciprocal relationships and becomes a topic they can or even have to touch upon when talking in pairs. The missing person therefore becomes the topic of the conversation, momentarily also connecting the two friends present, thus also consolidating their friendship. Each of the friends has a chance to inform each other about themselves and about the other missing friend, so no one falls out of the triad. Finally, since they are so important, groups of friends can be problematic not only if they are missed but also if one set of friends is rejected by others, as shown in the following: “Sometimes, things with Mani are problematic because he doesn't like-- * I feel like he doesn't want to, like, meet, you know, my * other friends, you know? * He'll always be like, 'No, hang out with my friends. * You know, come to my place. Like, * I don't want to see your friends'.” (Ava Adhikari) Her boyfriend's dismissal of Ava’s friends leads to things being “problematic”. It seems important to both of them to integrate the other into their own group of friends and if this does not

212

Main dimensions: beings, belongings and places

happen, it is also perceived as an affront to them or to their relationship. 6.2.8 Consequences of belonging to a group As described above, groups are mentioned in connection with various other topics and contexts and fulfil different functions. They can offer and provide support of many kinds, structure, and a feeling of belonging, which can also enhance one's sense of being. Being part of a group is mainly mentioned positively, as a desideratum, as a relief, or as a supportive, structuring or balancing agent. What is more, groups may be perceived as something the speakers should or would like to be part of but cannot, or as something which links them to the past, to their schooldays in their home country or to their identity as an international student. Accordingly, not being part of a group, not being accepted in a group, or their friends not being accepted by others is considered problematic. 6.3

Place(s)

Finally, a third cross-sectional main theme ever-present in the data is “places”. These may be geographical or not, may exist in reality or be imagined, may be delimited and defined by boundaries or may be only vaguely delineated. Whatever their nature and characteristics, places play a major role to the narrators in many ways. They relate to them, assert their importance, explain why places have been, still are or will be relevant and integrate them in their accounts about their everyday lives. The following section discusses the meanings of various places: “here”, “there”, “home”, vaguely defined areas and regions, and geographically definite places such as cities and countries. Moreover, I will discuss the issue of not relating to a place or to places.

Place(s)

213

6.3.1 Here In the interviews, the term “here” is used very often, mainly to introduce a general abstract concept that can encompass any geographical unit where the person is currently located. A number of narratives about activities, events, experiences, necessities and duties related – or specifically not related – to “here” accentuate its relevance. Nevena, for example, uses the term as follows: “nobody is LETting themselves connect with the place. […] I’m not letting myself FEel like home here” (Nevena Adam). In this case, “place” and “here” are used synonymously as notions of somewhere that need not be clearly determined. In this case, this place is one which the student is currently living in – and which she cannot or is not willing to relate to. Nevena's not feeling connected to the place also stems from her coming to her current place of residence “just” because of her husband's work: “when I arrived here, I didn’t know any of these people. I’m just here with him [husband] and that’s about it.” (Nevena Adam) This statement confirms the lack of any connection between Nevena and “here”; her link to the place is indirect, through him, and she does not consider it a direct connection. In Nevena's case, the student may not name the place because she does not have a personal relationship to it. However, various other students also do not feel the need to define the “here” they mention even though they do have a relationship to it. David, for example, states that “if you have your own life, like me HERE, I have a lot to do, friends, job and now university, too, you know” 209 (David Weyrich). David’s assertion that he is leading a full life “here” shows that he has a strong connection to his current place of residence. 209

“wenn man sein eigenes Leben hat, wie ich HIER, ich hab halt viel zu tun, Freunde, Arbeit, jetzt noch Uni dazu” (David Weyrich).

214

Main dimensions: beings, belongings and places

He has everyday duties that he considers “his own life” and has made friends there. Both these activities and the people connect him closely to the place. Throughout the interview, David’s “here” is linked to Canada or Toronto alternatively. He connects not only to the vague “here” but also to both these concrete geographical units in various ways, as will be discussed later. 6.3.2 There As well as the “here” presented above, the data also contains places which the students name as “there” and which can be delineated in different ways. In her account, for example, Nevena contrasts “here” and “there”, equating the “there” she is describing to Europe. “Europe is very multicultural. There * nobody is practising [e.g. social work/psychotherapy] this way” (Nevena Adam). “There” is opposed to her current location. In this case it is a large region with a completely different set of practices to the “here” she is talking about, according to Nevena. The two places, “Europe” and “here”, are not only geographically distant from one another but also distant with regard to the practices in the specific field she is talking about. In this case, “there” is a means of describing the geographical “here” and the practices used “here” more precisely, by contrasting them. Their relationships to these two categories of place support the descriptions of the students’ relationships in everyday life. In another example, Nevena discusses her situation and mentions “over there”, meaning her home country or else the country her family is currently living in, which are both far away. “Over there” is in this case the place she is currently not living in but which she has a strong relationship to: she either lived there herself or her family comes from there. The same pattern can be found in Agnieszka's words: “Da”, meaning “there”, where her parents are or where

Place(s)

215

many friends are. “There” can therefore be seen as a place the students have a strong connection to but which they are currently not in. Therefore, in the data, “there” is not the opposite of “here” in terms of relationship: while “here” is a place they may or may not relate to, “there” is a place they have a close connection to. An even closer bond to “there” is found in the following, in which “there” means “home” to Nevena: “HOME is important. I have not been there in YEars now. ** I’ll put Bulgaria […] she [a friend who went to Bulgaria] even brought me stUff from THERE” (Nevena Adam). In this passage, “home” is situated in or is Bulgaria. Since it is a significant place to them, some students write “home” on the map; others, like Nevena, first orally locate “home” in a country and then place the name of the country on the map. By doing this, Nevena classifies her connection to home as a connection to the country. In this manner, whenever someone goes to that country, whenever she meets someone from there or whenever someone brings her something from Bulgaria, as in the quote, she feels reconnected to “home”. If “home” were more specific, implying only her native town, for example, this mechanism of reconnection might happen less often. 6.3.3 Neither here nor there: living in a bubble Beyond the “here” and the “there” mentioned in the accounts, there is also a category that is neither here nor there. It can be seen as characteristic of temporary mobility, since in the accounts it is linked to the internationality of the group the speakers connect to and to the temporariness of their residence in one place. This is exemplified in the following quote: “It’s STRANGE because I’m * so connected to an international network that, uh ** I don’t know how Canadians live. Like, I feel that I * dOn’t have an insight of what Canadians do in the weekend. I know what * the international

216

Main dimensions: beings, belongings and places

students do in the weekend, for example, or * I know who is having a party or I know who is GOING somewhere or I know who is COMING but I’m * not really connected to the ** to the Canadian way of life. (I: Uh-huh.) You know, I think we live in a bubble. This is what we do right now. We just surround ourselves with ** with projections of what we missss * from other places * or from home or from * I dunno, Europe or * whatever is home for us or we surround ourselves with familiar – with comfortable images and then we just gravitate in these circles.” (Nevena Adam) The bubble described here can be seen as having an isolating effect, by keeping the people within it from connecting to others and to the place (region, country, city) they are living in. Further, according to Nevena, it creates a sphere that is not real but imagined: the people in the bubble surround themselves with comfortable images and projections of what they miss from elsewhere, from “whatever is home” for them. By doing so, they seem to avoid actually connecting to the reality surrounding them. Yet this bubble can also be seen as having a protective function. It offers the people in it the chance to project their nostalgic feelings onto one another and to feel connected to other places far away. Since they know how others feel in their current situation, they can relate to and understand one another’s needs. This ambivalence is present in the accounts and is linked to the situation of ambiguity the students are in: being in a certain place for a few years though not knowing precisely for how long, belonging to and being ascribed to a group of “internationals”, feeling the need to connect to the place they are in, and feeling the need to keep in touch with other places which (also) feel like home.

Place(s)

217

6.3.4 Cities Beyond the more flexible notions of “here” and “there”, cities are important concrete places which the students relate to in numerous ways: they may see them as isolating places or places to make connections, they may miss certain cities or may use them and their facilities to feel good in their current situation. Hamburg, one of the cities in which the respondents currently live, is perceived not only as anonymous and isolating but also as enriching, offering a variety of opportunities and as the perfect place to be. When talking about a friend, for example, Luis Alberto says that she “does not have many good friendship=uhm uh friendships here in Hamburg […] and knows jUst one or two people who, like who are from Hamburg […] so that's not really, so like, she cannot turn to these people.” 210 (Luis Alberto Hernandez Garcia) Luis Alberto mentions Hamburg quite often and sees difficulty making friends as connected to living in this specific city: “otherwise she is quite isolated […] because it is quite difficult in Hamburg […] for the people who uh are not from Hamburg” 211 (Luis Alberto Hernandez Garcia). As discussed in the section about loneliness, Luis Alberto states that it is difficult for non-Hamburgers to make friends with Hamburgers. He feels lonely in the city and describes the closed nature of cliques in Hamburg as preventing newcomers from connecting with them: “they already have their own sets of friends […] it's difficult to get into a friendship 210

“sie hat keine keineee große Freundschafts=ähm äh Freundschaften hier in Hamburg […] und kennnt nUr eine oder zwei Personen, die, also die von Hamburg sind [...] das ist also nicht so richtig, also wo sie nicht zurückgreifen kann auf diese Menschen.” (Luis Alberto Hernandez Garcia)

211

“sonst ist sie ziemlich isoliert [...] weil es ist ziemlich schwierig ist in Hamburg […] für die Menschen, die äh nicht aus Hamburg sind” (Luis Alberto Hernandez Garcia).

218

Main dimensions: beings, belongings and places

a bit more deeply” 212 (Luis Alberto Hernandez Garcia). Similarly to Nevena’s account in which she describes her resentment about not having many Canadian friends, being friends with people from Hamburg seems to be something Luis Alberto is especially desirous of and also something that worries him because it is so hard to achieve. In this case, Hamburg is described as a city where cliques exclude non-Hamburgers, creating situations in which people may feel isolated. A very different kind of connection to Hamburg as a city can be found in Ira Szycher's narrative: “I like Hamburg (LAUGHS)! (I: Hamburg? Ok.) Yeees. Well, it's simply ** 90% my * dREam city. […] I like it a lot here. Well, I feel gOOd here * and I uhhhm I simply feel this is my place for life. Well I don't know what will come nExt, but for now I am satisfied with it.” 213 (Ira Szycher) To Ira, the city is virtually perfect, so her felt connection to Hamburg is very positive. It is a place where she can imagine spending her whole life, although she simultaneously acknowledges that she does not know what will come next: how long she will live there or whether her feelings towards the city might change. Currently, she is satisfied with it. She appreciates various specific aspects of the city: “I like it that there is a lot of nature here” 214 (Ira Szycher), permitting her to spend time

212

“die haben schon ihre eigene Kreise […] es ist schwierig sich da ein bisschen tiefer in eine Freundschaft reinzukommen” (Luis Alberto Hernandez Garcia).

213

“Ich mag Hamburg (LACHT)! Hamburg! (I: Hamburg? Ok.) Jaa. Also das ist einfach ** zu neunzig Prozent meine * TrAUmstadt. […] es gefällt mir hier sehr gut. Also ich fühle mich hier wOhl * und ich ähhh ich fühle einfach das ist mein Platz für Leben ist. Also ich weiß nicht was wEIter wird, aber jetzt ich bin damit zufrIEden.” (Ira Szycher)

214

“ich mag dass hier auch viel Natur ist” (Ira Szycher).

Place(s)

219

outside, which she greatly enjoys. But not only the urban characteristics are relevant. The city's social life is also important to her, and Hamburg also fulfils her expectations in this respect. Ira enjoys “somehow * talking to older people and uhm sharing experiences” 215 (Ira Szycher). She further states: “Well this intergenerational exchange of ideas […] is very important. (I: Yes.) So I even already (LAUGHS) thought about doing something like that as a volunteer. […] Well there are so many such possibilities in Germany and in Hamburg.” 216 (Ira Szycher) Discussion with older people is something which Ira appreciates, enjoys and does not want to do without. She relates that before coming to Hamburg she used to have encounters with many older people in her surroundings and now misses the chance to hear about their lives and ask them questions, which in her view “somehow helps to look at life from a philosophical perspective” 217. Now that she is far from home, she no longer experiences this kind of discussion as often as before. Her surroundings have changed and there are not as many older people in her everyday life. Nevertheless, she is very pleased that there are places and organisations in Hamburg where intergenerational exchange is intentionally organised and has already thought about becoming active there. She explicitly mentions Hamburg as a city and Germany as a country in which this kind of activity is possible and, although she 215

“mit älteren Menschen irgendwie * zu sprechen und Erfahrungen und ähh aaa auszutauschen” (Ira Szycher).

216

“Also diese GenerationAUstausch [...] ist sehr wichtig. (I: Ja.) Also ich hab´sogar schon (LACHT) darüber nachgedacht irgendwas so freiwillig zu machen. […] Also es gibt so viel solche Möglichkeiten in Deutschland und in Hamburg.” (Ira Szycher)

217

“das hilft irgendwie das Leben von der philosophischen Seite zu betrachten” (Ira Szycher).

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has not yet taken up an activity of this type, merely the possibility of doing so is something she values highly. In this case, the city offers social spaces where people can fulfil quite specific important wishes and can connect to others in an organised manner. Like Ira, David describes a specific connection to his current city of residence, Toronto: “TorONto as a city is really very important. […] it [is] such a gOOd feeling to be here again and to somehow be part of the city and; also through the various, uhm possibilities to work in some prOject or other, do voluntary work and I feel like I rarely experienced this in Düsseldorf.” 218 (David Weyrich) Thanks to the various opportunities to participate in city life, David actually feels part of it. Being active in the city, actively participating in projects and doing volunteer work is his way of connecting to his surroundings. In his view, Toronto has a community spirit, and by joining in he becomes an integral part of his environment. The city in turn becomes an important part of his current life and it feels good to him to be there. The city the students are currently living in plays an important role because they connect to it in various ways as shown above. Sometimes, though, they also connect to cities because of the people who live there, as in Agnieszka Kowalczyk’s example: “I would actually * really write a city name (laughs shyly), because uuhhm *5* uhhm Martin is from Weimar (I: Mhm) and uhm * and uhm there he=has his family and all his best friends […] we are in Weimar very regularly, so like at least once every three weeks and of * that like * 218

“TorONto als Stadt is wirklich sehr wichtig. [...]“es [ist] son GUtes Gefühl wieder da zu sein und irgendwie Teil der Stadt zu sein und; auch durch die vielen, äh Möglichkeiten eben an irgendwelchen ProjEkten mitzuarbeiten, Freiwilligenarbeit zu machen und ich find dieses GemEinschaftsgefühl hab ich halt selten in Düsseldorf erlebt.” (David Weyrich)

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of course his friends are also my friends a bit” 219 (Agnieszka Kowalczyk). Unlike the examples above, here the city as a living environment and its characteristics do not play a role in the students' everyday life. It becomes extremely relevant, though, because it is the place where many important people live. These people, who were originally her partner's friends, are what attract the couple to the city. Agnieszka describes a connection to the city through the people living there. Being in Weimar means meeting friends and (her boyfriend’s) family, so the name of city on the map can be seen as standing for a circle of important people. Similarly, it is important people such as Agnieszka’s own friends and parents who connect her to two other cities: “Poznań, of course ** So uhmm *5* well, Poznań, especially where my parents are * aand also uuhm * Gdynia, because I have many * friends there (I: Hhm) and I lived there fo=five years (I: Hhm) yes. These are actually my * three most important cities like * except Hamburg (LAUGHS) of course” 220 (Agnieszka Kowalczyk). The fact that such important people live in a certain city elevates it to a position of relevance in her network. It becomes a place of reference, not only because she herself lived there for some time, but more significantly because a few significant others are currently (still) there. In this case it is not 219

“ich würde fast * eigentlich eine Stadtname (LACHT VERLEGEN) einschreiben, weeil ääh *5* ääh aus Weimar kommt Martin (I: Mhm) und ääh * und ääh da hat=er seine Familie und alle seine beste Freunde […] wir sind auch sehr regelmäßig in Weimar also so alle drei Wochen mindestens und * was also * natürlich sind seine Freunde auch meine Freunde n bisschen” (Agnieszka Kowalczyk).

220

“Natürlich Poznań ** Also eehm *5* naja, Poznań, vor allem da wo meine Eltern sind * uund auch ääh * Gdynia, weil ich da viele * Freunde habe (I: Mhm) und hab da vie=fünf Jahre gelebt (I:Mhm) ja. Das sind eigentlich meine * drei wichtigste Städte also * außer Hamburg (LACHT) natürlich” (Agnieszka Kowalczyk).

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her own experiences which link her to the city, as was the case in the examples above, but her connections to people there who in turn connect her to the place which constitutes a context for their friendship. Finally, a city can also provide a neutral environment in which to explore new horizons. After moving to Hamburg, for example, Seung-min meets new people and starts doing things on her own, outside the religious community she was previously so closely involved in, in Bonn. The Scheinerts, a couple she met in the community, still regularly come to Hamburg for business, on which occasion they also meet her. This couple has also offered to support her financially, thus becoming a link between the two places, Hamburg and Bonn, and between her former life in Bonn and her current one in Hamburg. While Seung-min still remains connected to Bonn and to the community, both emotionally and financially, Hamburg becomes a place in which she can establish new relationships and explore new environments and meaningful contexts. 6.3.5 Places – connecting people As shown, important people can be the initial spark or catalyst that connects students to places. Further, people and especially friends can also be what preserves the relationship with a place in the long term. The following example shows that, over time, a place can gain additional meaning: “Sverige, Sweden is very important for me becauuse we met there […] and of course * well even though I very * rarely visit Sweden we also have mutual friends there I have very many friends there” 221 (Agnieszka Kowalczyk). The couple’s friends 221

“[...] Sverige, Schweden, ist für mich sehr wichtig, weeil da haben wir uns kennen gelernt […] und natürlich * also auch wenn ich sehr * wenig Schweden besuche da haben wir auch gemeinsame Freunde ich hab ganz viele Freunde da” (Agnieszka Kowalczyk).

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being there now maintains the connection to a country which first became important because Agnieszka met her partner there. This indirect connection – through people to a place – can also be established to a speaker's current living environment, as in the following example from David’s narrative: “this way we quickly felt at HOme, because well we had friends. And I think for us friends have always been more important thannn, no not more important than family, but at least just as important as family” 222 (David Weyrich). Here, too, friends are the connecting element between the student and the city that he and his partner are currently living in. It was having friends that enabled them to feel at home soon after their arrival. David Weyrich does not mention any activities they did with their friends; it is merely the fact that they had friends that evokes the feeling of being in a familiar environment. In turn, family is mentioned as a unit of comparison: friends are at least as important as family. This statement is also relevant to the comment about feeling at home quickly, because it shows what friends mean to the couple. Their putting friends on a level with family exemplifies the home-building effect friends have in their life: they can easily create a feeling of home anywhere, independently of the actual place, as long as they have friends there. Nevertheless, it is important that the place enables them to find friends in the first place. Similarly, another student explains that through connecting to friends she feels at home: “I think a lot of, like, my friends who I still connect a lot to, I sort of, like, connect them to, like, home, you know, because * I grew up with them, like I said, right? So, * instead of having, like, A plAce, I find it in people I guess, you know? […] So, 222

“so ham wir uns halt schnell zuHAUse gefühlt, weil wir halt Freunde hatten. Und ich glaub für uns war´n Freunde eigentlich schon immer wichtiger alss, ne nicht wichtiger als Familie, aber mindestens genauso wichtig, wie Familie” (David Weyrich).

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I feel like this concept of home applies more here [pointing at the people on the map she grew up with]” (Ava Adhikari). Here, home is a connection to a certain group of people rather than a concrete place. By connecting to these people, independently of where she is or they are, she can experience a feeling of home: “So, like, when I, like, talk to these people, I feel like, okay, I feel at home.” (Ava Adhikari) She contrasts this feeling to the one that others might have whose families and friends all live in one place: “because I grew up in a boarding school, everybody is, like-- NObody is living in one place. Like, that's another thing. Like, * these people have, like, homes to go back to where EVerybody is in this ONe place, you know? [...] there's no, like, One country where I can just be like, yeah, everybody's there.” (Ava Adhikari) As she went to a boarding school attended by children from all over the country, her friends are now spread throughout the country and abroad. Her statement implies that she considers it more commonplace to equate home to one specific place or country where “everybody” lives. However, as her friends live in various countries, she does not have this unified home and place or country. She does not mark this fact as a negative aspect. Instead, it is expressed as a logical consequence and explains the remark concerning her feeling at home when talking to people she grew up with, specifically with those from school, wherever they may be. This example shows how nuanced identification with a place can be and how a notion that is otherwise usually connected to a place (in this case the notion of home) need not be, while still fulfilling the person’s need for identification and belonging.

7

Relationships spanning beings, belongings and places

The previous chapters have shown that, when describing the factors that shape and influence their everyday lives, international students introduce a variety of people, places, objects, organisations and ideas that are important to them. Three main threads weave their way through the accounts (see Chapter 6): 1) the ways international students define themselves, i.e. their identities or beings; 2) the variety of their belongings, e.g. to groups, communities, or contexts; and 3) the importance of places and the roles they play in everyday life. In the analysis of the ways international students perceive and depict themselves and their everyday lives, the following topics emerged. Firstly, being an international student is a category which is linked to various roles the students fulfil, e.g. being a family member, a friend, a partner, a believer or a mentee, as well as to states they are in, e.g. lonely, isolated, or supported. Secondly, when it comes to belongings, the students mention not just classes, sports groups or religious communities, but also national communities as groups which they belong to or participate in and of which they feel, do not feel, or wish to be an integrative part. Thirdly, places are particularly relevant in the accounts, e.g. the notions of here, there and specific cities, regions or countries. These three dimensions delineate the space within which the students locate their relationships. These dimensions, and the codes and patterns which they comprise, share an inherent transnationalism: the relationships the students describe span a number of countries, often not just two (e.g. a former country of residence and the current one) but many simultaneously. What is more, the students describe imaginary and

© The Editor(s) (if applicable) and The Author(s), under exclusive license to Springer Fachmedien Wiesbaden GmbH, part of Springer Nature 2020 A. Altissimo, Beings, Belongings and Places, Wissenschaft – Hochschule – Bildung, https://doi.org/10.1007/978-3-658-31364-7_7

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actual movements between these countries not as linear but as multiplex. Therefore, to sufficiently grasp the complexity and multiplicity of the students’ networks and their understandings of their everyday lives, a transnational perspective upon the beings, belongings and places they discuss is needed. In the following, I link this requirement to this project’s findings. Both in research and in everyday understanding, international students are often viewed primarily as students coming from one country and staying in another to study while sustaining ties to their country of origin before going back there. They are thus ascribed a fixed identity as “international”, i.e. belonging to a specific nation and currently a guest or in transit, and as “students”, i.e. as people whose main activity is studying. Instead, as shown above, international students describe sustaining multiple important relationships to entities in various countries simultaneously, are linked to numerous places all over the world which play different roles in their lives, and pursue a number of activities which are important to them and which make up their identity. Further, they do not necessarily want to “go back” anywhere, and may also be open to moving elsewhere. These issues, which I look into in this section, call for a broader perspective on the three main dimensions, rather than a binational one implying linear understandings of students’ identity and of their affiliations, and binary understandings of “here and there” or “here and home”. 7.1

Flexible beings

As the analysis previously revealed, international students constantly process and negotiate their identities and their belongings transnationally. Transnationalism is intrinsic to all spheres and contexts of their everyday life: friendships, studies, partnerships, feelings, hobbies, decisions, problems, needs, wishes or beliefs. It

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cannot be isolated to certain activities or important entities only, since this would not do justice to the way they describe themselves in their networks. It is these transnational social networks that structure their members’ sense of belonging (Richter & Nollert, 2014, p. 4), as well as their sense of being and their perception of places. These dimensions – beings, belongings and places – form a space infused by the relationships described in the accounts. The relationships may be connected to these dimensions, but this connection is not static: it can change over time. Similarly, Ghosh and Wang (2003) find that when exploring their own identities as people performing what they call transnational acts, they “have created several hybrid identities, and often switch positions between those hyphenated identities in accordance with the demands of the context (place and time)” (Ghosh & Wang, 2003, pp. 276–277). Here, I do not wish to discuss international students’ understandings of self as individuals, 223 but rather how their relationships infuse the dimensions of beings, belongings and places. Currently, scholars carrying out research on international students are increasingly questioning static or comparative perspectives and acknowledging the ways students constantly negotiate their identities. Gargano (2012) draws attention to the “ruptures that require constant sense-making and negotiation of identities as students attempt to combine the foreign and the familiar. Situational contexts, interpersonal interactions, and the imagination all determine 223

Somers (1994): “One way to avoid the hazards of rigidifying aspects of identity into a misleading categorical entity is to incorporate into the core conception of identity the categorically destabilizing dimensions of time, space, and relationality. We can do this by bringing to the study of identity formation the epistemological and ontological challenges of relational and network analysis.”

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which selves surface at any point in time” (p. 146). She points towards a flexibility in the students’ understanding of self, which is also reflected in this study’s results. In a piece of research which, like Gargano’s and like this study’s, is based on the narratives of international students, Robertson (2018) introduces the notion of the “translocal” self and focusses on how encounters, interactions, and also “specific urban localities, materialities and social practices are involved in the negotiation of the ‘translocal’ self” (p. 539). Nevena (see Section 5.3), for example, is currently living in Canada, but at the same time relates to France (where she lived for a few years and which is her husband’s country of origin), to Bulgaria (her own country of origin), to the town she used to live in there, to Beijing and China (where a good friend of hers, who used to live in Canada, currently lives), to Germany (where she and her husband spent a period of time to see whether they wanted to move there), to Europe and to Canada (as broader contexts of experience). All these places are meaningful to Nevena and shape her everyday life and understandings of her own being. Therefore, while up to now I have been mainly positing “transnationalism” in students’ networks, the notion of “translocality” is also similarly promising in this field of research, as I will discuss later. In their self-reflections, the international PhD students Ghosh and Wang (2003) 224 also state: “As we argued earlier, our transnational acts differ because we negotiate ‘who I am’, ‘who I want to be’, ‘who I can be’ and ‘how I can be both here and there’ differently, profoundly influenced by our self-perception of the migration act, our individual social identities developed at home and transported across borders, our social connections and material circumstances in Toronto, our sense of the perceptions and expectations of the 224

The authors are not part of my survey sample.

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host and home societies about us and the material circumstances of our friends and family back home” (p. 277). They acknowledge that their own identities are interlinked with their social connections and material circumstances in their current context and in former contexts (i.e. home/home societies) and finally conclude that “[o]ver time, actions change and ramify and create fluid and situational transnational identities” (p. 282). While Ghosh and Wang’s understanding of transnationalism seems to span two places, the accounts in this study show that it can span any number of places and contexts which students may relate to when constructing their beings. Accordingly, Doherty and Singh (2008) find that internationally mobile students construct their identities “from the resources at hand and the subjectivities offered to them in their new context. Thus, who they were ‘here’ depended on who they could be in this place – what kinds of spaces and roles were made available for them and how they chose to fit or dispute such positioning” (p. 110). And, when looking into students’ friendship networks, Robertson (2018) points out that “[w]hile some studies recognise the importance of transnational friendship networks (see, for example, Gargano, 2009; Gomes et al., 2014) few focus in depth on how emplaced encounters and interactions with friends within the multiple local spaces that make up transnational social fields may have bearing on negotiations of translocal subjectivity” (p. 542). This study focused on how such emplaced encounters and how interactions not only with friends, but also with other entities (e.g. institutions, ideas, relatives, beliefs, activities) influence international students’ negotiations of their subjectivity. Subjectivity is closely related to identity and to beings: identity can be described as a person’s range of beings. Anthias describes identity as follows: “Identity involves individual and collective narratives of self and

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other, presentation and labeling, myths of origin and myths of destiny with associated strategies and identifications” (Anthias 2009, p. 233). In my analysis, I focused on these narratives found in the data to reconstruct how international students perceive themselves; in other words, what beings they describe in connection to the relationships they are involved in. Luis Alberto, for example, talks about himself as someone who is available for his (inter alia international) friends at any time and who would be willing to move to Peru if his mother needed him or if he found his true love there. Beside this, in his account he appears as a hard-working and loyal colleague and as a person who would appreciate being more embedded in a local and stable network of friends, but who feels lonely instead, due to the anonymity of the city he is currently living in. His beings are defined by present and past existing and imaginary connections to various entities, among which localities, geographically close and distant, play an important role; they are flexible beings, depending on the relationships he is currently referring to. 7.2

Belonging through foci

At the same time, the accounts reveal the students’ affiliations to groups, classes, or communities, which I call “belongings”. Anthias delineates belongings as “more about experiences of being part of the social fabric and as the ways in which social bonds and ties are manifested in practices, experiences and emotions of inclusion.” (ibid., p. 233) Students describe feeling included, for example in sports groups, in which they experience cohesion and structure (as in Akemi’s case) or a connection to their neighbourhood and to peers (as in David’s case). In her study based on interviews with young Norwegian Muslim women (16–25 years old) with immigrant backgrounds, Walseth (2006) explores the relationship between

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sport and belonging and finds various ways in which they are connected, e.g. belonging to a team, to a sports club, to a local community, as well as finding a number of functions which sports activities fulfil, e.g. offering a place to receive and provide social support, to be successful together, to celebrate and have fun, to find refuge, for recreation, as a free space (or heterotopia), as a context in which they can do what they want to do and not what they are expected to do, in which they can feel special, which offers a positive confirmation and recognition of their identity. However, the environments in which these activities are practised are not free from class differences among club members, which can still lead to exclusion and segregation amongst the members of a team, a club or a sports community. Walseth therefore concludes that “sport participation may, under certain circumstances, contribute to minority youth’s feeling of belonging” but does not want to propound that there is an automatic link. She also finds that team sports are more strongly linked to feelings of belonging than individualistic sports (see p. 461). In my study, I come to similar conclusions: students who played soccer or went rowing felt very much connected to their team and felt included in their neighbourhood; they experienced support and solidarity. By contrast, going to a gym to exercise alone and where there is no need to communicate is mentioned as not providing the environment or the interaction necessary to establish any kind of connection, let alone belonging. Another context found in my data that fosters belonging to a community which members can profit from, and which profits from their participation in it, is religious communities, as described in detail in Seung-min’s case (see Section 5.2). Seung-min emphasises how grateful she is to the religious community she is part of and how happy and lucky she has felt ever since she came to Germany. Ellison’s (1991) findings support my results by showing how religion

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is related to well-being and how it influences life satisfaction positively. Various studies have described how religious institutions can provide social integration by nurturing friendships and social ties, how social support can be found in such reliable, informal religious social networks while possibly also experiencing closer social control due to restrictive norms existing in the community (for an overview see Ellison, p. 81). Basing their study on the finding that religiosity and life satisfaction are positively associated, Lim and Putnam (2010) ask how they are associated. They find that “the friendship networks people build in their congregations mediate most of the effects of attendance on life satisfaction” (p. 927). Moreover, their analyses suggest that it is not just the private or subjective aspect of religiosity itself, nor merely belonging to a community which contribute to people’s life satisfaction, but the combination and interaction of the two: “social networks forged in congregations and strong religious identities are the key variables that mediate the positive connection between religion and life satisfaction.” (ibid. p. 927). Religiosity does play a role in various interviews in this study, as in the cases of Ava, Seung-min and David, who mention them in their narrative or also place them on their network map. These important entities can be considered as promoting relationships (e.g. to other people) and their life satisfaction. In Seung-min’s case, the effect described by Lim and Putnam becomes particularly clear: her strong religiosity combined with her closeknit network lead to her great satisfaction with her life since she came to Germany. The support provided to her originates from a transnational connection between her former professor in South Korea and the religious community in Germany (cf. Smith 2012). Edling et al. contradict Lim and Putman: they come to the conclusion that it is not necessary for the circle of friends to be religious for the person in question to be happy. In their study amongst

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19-year-olds in Sweden with and without a background of immigration, they find that what is relevant for all is the existence of a shared social focus, which need not be religious faith, and that this communal connection increases their happiness. While my study’s aim is not to establish whether the respondents are happier because of or despite being religious, it does become clear that shared social foci are very relevant to them, either because they exist in their lives or because the students negatively feel a lack thereof. Feld (1981) defines a focus as “a social, psychological, legal or physical entity around which joint activities are organized (e.g., workplaces, voluntary organization, hangouts, families, etc.)” (p. 1016). He looks into such foci and the processes through which ties to them become patterns in networks (p. 1017): when two persons share a focus, they “are more likely to share joint activities than two random people” (p. 1019) and when foci are constraining, this likelihood increases. In the international students’ networks, such entities can be found in the form, for example, of topics, places or activities. If they are present, the students connect to them and through them also connect to other people and other entities – as can be observed visually in particularly intricate network maps. If they are lacking, students may express this as a feeling of loneliness or isolation: when asked what is missing on their map they specifically comment on a place or a time in which they might come together with other like-minded people sharing the same interest, e.g. dancing, sports or studying (see also 5.1.2.6: “Loneliness threatens everyone” and 6.1.4 “Being lonely”). This is also one of the conclusions which Sawir et al. come to in their extensive study on international students in Australia. One main finding of theirs is that more than two thirds of the international students interviewed have experienced feelings of loneliness, which can arise when the need to belong is not satisfied (Sawir

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p. 152). They distinguish between personal, social and cultural loneliness and suggest that a way to alleviate these three forms would be to strengthen the connection between international students themselves, between international students and local students and between international students and their social localities. One way of achieving this last target, they suggest, is to “build involvement in community-based sporting clubs, activity groups, religious institutions, and the like, enabling international students to get to know Anglo-Australians and others.” (ibid. p. 174) Their suggestion of supporting students’ involvement in clubs, groups and institutions is in line with the above-mentioned concept of foci towards which people converge, thus increasing the possibility of connections between them. When it comes to belonging to contexts in higher education institutions, loneliness can be felt particularly strongly, as in the cases of Nevena, who perceives herself as an outsider and as not enabled to participate in her class, or Seung-min, who has no friends amongst her fellow students. This is in line with Sawir et al.’s finding that “[s]ome international students have a heightened sense of loneliness in institutional settings, especially when they are in difficulty, exacerbating personal or social loneliness.” (Sawir p. 157) In these cases, although foci are available, i.e. class situations in which topics of common interest are discussed, no interaction takes place. Sawir et al. suggest that the “creation of more successful educational engagements between international students and local students, based on sharing and mutual respect in a common learning setting, could reduce the initial sense of loss experienced by international students, shorten the period of anxiety and greatest difficulty, provide a starting point for social bonding, mitigate cultural shock, and quicken learning of conversational and academic English.” (p. 173) As Warhurst shows by analysing a group of early-career academics

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through the lens of situated learning, “academic practice can be construed as socially situated and distributed in specific contexts and [that] learning thus requires participation in communities of practice” (p. 111). It is precisely the lack of any opportunity to participate in and to belong to a community of practice which Nevena denounces. In the following, I discuss how the formation of such foci is facilitated in certain contexts and by specific understandings. 7.3

Spanning places

Just as the topic of (not) belonging to certain groups and communities and of connecting through foci is based on the previously discussed flexibility and transnationalism of beings found in the students’ accounts, this third section reconnects to the previous two and focusses on the places connected to them. Previously, Section 6.3 described a number of ways in which places and location are relevant in the students’ accounts: e.g. when they talk about here, there, neither here nor there, cities and the way places do or do not enable further connections. In Chapter 8, places also play a role when it comes to the way support is, could or cannot be provided (e.g. due to geographical distance). The category of “place(s)” proves complex, since places can be both concrete, e.g. a city or classroom, or abstract, e.g. “there” or “home”. The notion of “home” provides a convenient example for how to deal with such notions within this field of study, as shown in the following. When discussing “how international students construct their identities drawing on their social networks” (p. 129), Pham and Saltmarsch (2013) describe these processes as follows: “Students operate multiple relationships both at home and in their residing country; thus they take actions, make decisions and develop subjectivities and identities that are embedded in these networks of relationships. Students’ learning experiences are shaped and

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reshaped as their transnational social networks and the dynamics of these social relationships transform over time (Monkman, 1997: 4).” (Pham and Saltmarsch, 2013, p. 132). While seconding the need for sensitivity to the relationships’ dynamics and the temporariness of subjectivities and identities, I propose broadening the reference points by pointing out that students operate multiple relationships in a number of places they feel are relevant, i.e. not only “at home and in their residing country”. I further wish to call attention to the difficult nature of the term “home”. As shown in this study’s data, the students have a strong attachment or a wish to achieve this level of attachment to their current place of residence. They mention a variety of definitions of “home”, displaying an array of geographical and social characteristics. Some, for example, distinguish between different homes by calling them “my home here” and “my home there” or “home” and “home home”. Therefore, instead of linking this term to one specific place, I suggest viewing it as linked to relevant relationships, which is more in line with the results of my analyses. When discussing post-national identities and belongings, Hannerz (2002) offers a viable definition of home: “It is certainly a physical environment, but in no small part a social environment. Its core relationships tend to be long-term, face to face, broadly inclusive in terms of content – relationships with ‘significant others’, involving a strong emotional load.” (p. 218) Hannerz then asks “Can the qualities taken to be characteristic of ‘home’ be organized in space in other ways?” (p. 225). The assumption that international students’ actual homes are elsewhere only, and thus labelling their current place of residence as a temporary environment, conceals the much broader understandings the students themselves adopt. It also does not reflect the fact that for some international students, “[r]eturning home’ is not part of the equation”, as found in Baas’ (2013, p. 5) study on Indian students in

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Australia (p. 5). In order to do justice to these different realities, we need to develop more flexible vocabularies and definitions when discussing such concepts. Secondly, this rethink of the meaning of “home” brings us back to the earlier call for a transnational perspective on understandings of emotionally loaded environments and entities, and on the students’ relationships in and with them. As Dahinden (2012) concludes in her discussion of transnational belonging and non-ethnic forms of identification, “engaging in forms of transnational identification and belonging is an everyday fact in the lives of many migrants and can as such manifest a wide range of possibilities […].” (p. 6) It is only by being open to the “transnational” that it becomes possible to perceive and understand these “possibilities” she mentions. Similarly, when theorising on the ways scholars (re)construct place and home, Erdal (2014) also discusses how the notion of the nation is often linked to that of home. This link perpetuates a collective idea that “going home” is commonly understood as going to one specific nation. Erdal (ibid.) asks who has the power to decide what can and cannot be defined as home, examines how it is defined and narrated, and questions whether being in place and being out of place are truly opposites. Narrow definitions of being in place can easily lead to exclusive understandings and implications of belongings. Instead, a flexible understanding of home, not necessarily or mainly linked to a nation, remains open to interpretation and can be used to denote different entities simultaneously. By contrast, automatically linking the entities important to international students to one specific country, without questioning this connection, perpetuates methodological nationalism in this field of study, as criticised by Shahjahan & Kezar, 2013, Amelina & Faist, 2012, and Nowicka & Cieslik, 2013.

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Another more concrete and delineated place made relevant by the students, and which is also increasingly being researched in migration studies, is the city. As Blunt (2007) states, “[t]he city has been a particularly important site for the analysis of transnational migration and citizenship.” (p. 688) Glick Schiller and Çaglar (2008) also call for research about the “place of migrants within the social fabric of specific cities” (p. 20), since “migrants both experience and contribute to the forces of integration and fragmentation, as they participate in the rescaling of urban economies, politics and governance and the reshaping of geographies of representation.” (p. 1). As discussed in Sections 6.1.4.4 and 6.3.4, cities constitute an environment that students can (or cannot) connect to; they provide a specific infrastructure and do or do not offer opportunities which influence the students’ everyday lives. At the same time, the students mention ways in which they interact with entities at a local level and, for example, do voluntary work or engage in sports and other leisure activities, in turn influencing their local environments. While a country or nation, being linked to nationality, does not offer a flexible and self-established belonging, the concept of the city does; students do mention various ways in which they feel or do not feel connected to various cities, participate in city life and feel they do or do not belong to them. Therefore, as more generally in migration and mobility studies, the city is a fruitful dimension to look into in the research about international students. Finally, in the students’ accounts, higher education institutions (HEIs) are also mentioned, albeit rarely. These can serve as places that connect, i.e. as foci. But they can also be places in which students feel excluded and cannot participate, share or interact in the ways they would like to. The campus in general, and more specifically classrooms, offices, libraries, cafeterias and canteens are experienced as being less or more inclusive depending on the

Spanning places

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interaction between the people there. Section 5.1.2.7 exemplifies in more detail how HEIs can or cannot function as places in which connections can emerge, and thus as the foci described in Section 7.2. While HEIs are concrete places in which knowledge is supposedly produced, Raghuram (2013) puts forward a convincing reasoning for a different focus within migration theory: “As a result although students are the quintessential knowledge migrants, labour and family migrants too are imbricated in knowledge acquisition, both prior to and after migration. At the same time student migrants too are involved in work and family, just like other migrants. What is distinctive then about student migrants, and what challenges and opportunities does this blurring of boundaries offer us for theorising student migration?” (Raghuram, 2013, p. 1) This blurring of boundaries can also be found in this study. In agreement with Raghuram, I call for an extension of “existing analyses, which have primarily focused on the spatialities of migration, to also take account of the spatialities of knowledge” (ibid.), especially in the field of student mobility (see Chapter 9). Before that, I focus on the issue of support found in international students’ networks, which, in turn, emphasises the co-existence of and even the necessity for transnationalism and integration.

8

Support in international students’ relationships

As discussed above, international students display a broad variety of beings, belongings and relationships to places, which they link in various ways to their being international students, and which can at the same time be seen as common among mobile people in general, among young people and/or also among other students. They make contact with new people, engage in new activities and have to become acquainted with new contexts when they move abroad to study. Their networks are assumedly still quite fluid at first and new relationships not yet established. They may not quite know with whom they can exchange resources and on whom they can rely. By turning to different people in different situations, they find out which topics and needs are compatible with which relationships by determining which topics are addressed in which ways with whom (for example, whether they can talk about financial problems), as shown in Seung-Min’s and in Luis Alberto’s cases. Apart from the founding of new relationships in their everyday lives, their whole network undergoes changes and adaptations due to their mobility, which can be seen as specific to international students and which is also a topic in the accounts. This chapter describes different kinds of support in international students’ networks and the correlation between place/geographical proximity, and support. 8.1

“She's eternal”: flexible support “to go”

The first kind of support is exemplified in the conversation with Kumkum Ha, a Chinese student in Canada. She is narrating about her everyday life, her relationships to her friends and especially about one friend, Ming Feng. She met Ming Feng on the Internet a long time ago and says about her: “This is also anOther friend that's © The Editor(s) (if applicable) and The Author(s), under exclusive license to Springer Fachmedien Wiesbaden GmbH, part of Springer Nature 2020 A. Altissimo, Beings, Belongings and Places, Wissenschaft – Hochschule – Bildung, https://doi.org/10.1007/978-3-658-31364-7_8

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important for me. […] we met first on the Internet. […] for the first time, chatted for about six hours, * yes, because we're arguing about some points. […] she has different ideas * and point of views compared to mine. […] But, these are very helpful or to learn that-why people think so different” (Kumkum Ha). This is someone who provides Kumkum with an alternative point of view to her own. Chatting and discussing online with this friend gives her the chance to broaden her horizon and to learn something new. At first, the nature of this friendship may not be perceived as being supportive, but Kumkum Ha herself does describe it as “helpful” because she feels that thanks to Ming Feng she learns why people think in different ways. The characteristic of this supportive relationship is that it is flexible, portable, mobile, and can be revived at any time and place, even after long periods without contact: “[…] we contact each other in most situations by emails * and sometimes by, like, MSN. […] Sometimes, like, could be several times a day * or just like ONce a week. * It depends on the situation that, if we have a discussion topic or not, * or if we both are vEry busy at that, uh, time, we may not even contact each other for months.” (Kumkum Ha) Finally, it is not important for the two people involved to meet at all. It is a possibility but it does not influence the nature or the course of the relationship: “I have mEt her once, * yeah, (LAUGHTER) only once. […] we were in the same city, but we rarely asked to meet with each other because that's not important.” (Kumkum Ha) Co-presence and geographical boundaries are not an issue: media which detach communication from time and place make it possible to share ideas with anyone, anywhere at any given time. The sole precondition is access to the Internet or to a telephone. Even though the parties exchanging support may be far from each other, immediacy in the exchange is thereby enabled.

“She's eternal”: flexible support “to go”

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A second example for this kind of support is found in Nevena's description of her relationship to a very close friend of hers: “She’s etErnal. […] She will always be there no matter where I GO and where I choose to LIVE” (Nevena Adam). This quote again shows that the support experienced is completely detached from place and time, a notion powerfully expressed by the word “eternal”. The concept of timelessness is then reinforced by the word “always”, while the notion of placelessness is verbalised by her specifying that her friend will be there for her independently of her choice of place. To summarise, the characteristics of support “to go” are 1) Independence of place: it can be provided by anyone anywhere to anyone anywhere else: their whereabouts do not play a role. This leads to 2) independence of co-presence/co-locality: the people are not required to be in the same place at the same time. 3) Independence of time: the support is only linked to having access to media and can therefore be requested at any given time (given the necessary devices and a connection). It is not even necessary for the two parties to be using the media simultaneously, as messages can be sent and received asynchronously. This, in turn, is made possible by 4) multimediality: a variety of means of communication enables this kind of support. This mobile, flexible support is always available and is not influenced or modified by changes in the lives of the people involved. It can be tapped into from anywhere at any time, with little effort and no excessive costs. The parties exchanging the support are jointly involved in maintaining the connection, as long as they are interested in the support arising from it. Support “to go” can therefore only be and remain so if the parties’ commitment towards it is ensured and it is not an objective given. Since it is independent of time and locality, this kind of support is not subject to changes when people’s mobility alters.

244 8.2

Support in international students’ relationships “On the other side of the world”: far and fixed support

A second type of support can be characterised as fixed, immobile support. My findings show that this kind of support is connected to people, things and places that do not move geographically. It is support which stays in the place people once received it but perhaps cannot experience it any longer, e.g. from their family or best friends who are far away. The students’ own mobility has led to changes in the supportive relationships. In the following example, Akemi describes her and her family's experience. Akemi is originally from Japan and moved with her family to Malaysia, where her parents and sister still live. Akemi went to an international school in Malaysia, travelled a lot, and then moved to Canada where she is now studying. Akemi states: “the sheer difficulty coming from, you, living your life alone away from your family, away from your SUPPORT systems. […] your mOther is not there to take care of you, you know, and your=maybe your food here in this country is different from what you eat back home […] all these basic things RAdically change” (Akemi Osaka). Akemi describes her move from Malaysia to Canada as disrupting. She left her family, which she calls her “support system”, in Malaysia and now has to get by without them. Even basic, everyday things such as eating become challenging. Her “support system” is far away and cannot do anything. In this sense, the support she mentions is fixed, because it cannot come to Akemi's rescue, even in very difficult times, as shown by the next quote: “third year [of studies] was REAlly, REAlly difficult. […] And the family got really WORRIED about me, too, but then they can’t hElp me because they’re not in Canada, they’re in the other side of the world. So * thAt kind of * made thEm uneasy too.” (Akemi Osaka) The family's being geographically distant makes it impossible for them to help and leaves them feeling impotent. Akemi also states that moving to

“On the other side of the world”: far and fixed support

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a new country is not what is difficult in itself; it is leaving behind a support system which is challenging: “So it’s one thing to go to a nEw country WITH your family and another thing to go to the new country by yourself. […] when I went to Malaysia, it was easier cause we=I had people to help me with and we suffered toGEther, right?” Her examples show that she perceives this support structure as being geographically immobile, i.e. it cannot move with her. In consequence, the support is fixed in another sense: it is also unchangeable. The family's incapability to provide either the support they used to provide or a new and different kind of support instead makes them feel “uneasy”. In theory, they are a supportive entity that has proven to be such in the past when they were in the same place as Akemi, for example with her in Malaysia. There, they could not keep her from experiencing difficulties either, since they were experiencing difficulties themselves. Nevertheless, they provided a form of support just by being there, too, and by “suffering together”, as Akemi puts it. Now, instead, they feel uneasy because they can only witness the suffering without being able to participate in it or to provide other kinds of help. To sum up, the characteristics distinguishing fixed support are: 1) Dependence on place: It is linked to place or even located in one specific place and cannot easily be moved from one place to another. It cannot be provided from the old location in the same way if the recipient is not there any longer. This is due to its 2) dependence on co-presence/co-locality: those offering and receiving support need to be in the same place at the same time for that exchange to happen. 3) Rigidity: it cannot change in nature or in the way it is provided and mediated.

246 8.3

Support in international students’ relationships “If I ever move to China”: fixed but flexible support

A third kind of support can be distinguished which is both flexible and fixed. It is support that is “on standby” and could be reactivated at any time. The following quote from the conversation with Nevena characterises it: “Here people come and go sometimes […] I’m thinking of my friend who left and went to Beijing. I could have PUT him in the list […] but six months ago he left.” This first part of the statement provides the background. The social or geographical “here” mentioned is a scene of movement, people are particularly mobile and the relationships are fluctuating (see 5.3.5: “People come and go sometimes: friendships in international bubbles”). Nevena calls these contacts “people” and not “friends”, apart from one person in particular. Their relationship is explained as one in which “whenever things would go BAD, he would come to talk to ME and we always keep in TOUCH. And if I will ever move to CHIna * he will be THEre.” (Nevena Adam) This formerly quite intimate friendship used to be based on their talking and providing each other with comfort and moral support. Now that this friend is in China, they still keep in touch, but it is not as strong a connection as it used to be. This is shown by Nevena stating that she could have put him on the original list of friends, but did not because “six months ago he left” (Nevena Adam). Still, she knows that if she should ever move to China one day, he will be there. Nevena herself is quite mobile and does not know where she will go in the future. It is not improbable that she might move to China, as she is inclined to mobility and her husband often goes there for work. In an eventuality of this kind, she will need support from someone who knows the environment, and someone to talk to. In that case, she will already have this friend she can count on. The expression “he will be there” is particularly ambiguous: her friend will not only be there physically and geographically, but he will also “be there” for her as

“If I ever move to China”: fixed but flexible support

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a reliable contact who can support her in moments of difficulty. Geographical proximity can therefore entail emotional proximity, and the expression “he will be there” is simultaneously a localisation and emotional characterisation of this supportive relationship. This expression, though, also shows that for Nevena if someone is “not there” geographically, it is more difficult for them to “be there” emotionally. This also has important implications for the question of fixed and flexible support. Nevena and her friend in China are connected to each other by the support they have provided one another in the past and might provide one another in future. She says: “So he is definitely someone that I’mmm nOt excluding ** from my life, it's someone that I want to keep” (Nevena Adam). This support can also be defined as being mobile and immobile, because at the moment the two friends are both locally settled in different places and thus cannot provide the support they used to. Nevertheless, there is a probability that they might be able to do so if they are geographically reunited one day due to their biographical mobility. Other students also mention similar “standby” support relationships when talking about their siblings or friends who might one day come and study where they are currently studying. They suppose that, in the event, their close reciprocal support relationship, which is currently curbed by the geographical distance between them, would regain its intensity. When situations were sought in which support was brought up, the data revealed that this kind of support is often mentioned as being provided by the students to others. For example, students state that if their ageing parents should need their help, they would interrupt their studies or find ways to go there and help them. Other students state that their friends know they can call them at any time of the day and night and they will try to help somehow. This seems to be the result of the support firstly

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being fixed but flexible, and secondly being transnational. The students are aware of the distinctiveness of their situation and adjust to it by trying to make the support they can provide as flexible or mobile as possible. Therefore, this kind of support is one that is theoretically available but currently not being provided as much as it could be. Summing up, this support displays the following characteristics: 1) Geographical proximity: the people exchanging it need to be able to see each other. 2) Flexibility regarding time: the relationships can be reactivated at any time. 3) Flexibility regarding its kind: the kind of support provided in this relationship can change, depending on current contexts and needs. 4) Flexibility regarding the place: it can be revived anywhere if the people are in the same place and is connected to movements that are not predictable. The assumption that these examples put forward is that support in itself is not an objective. Instead, it is socially constructed as mobile or immobile in specific contexts. The following discussion focusses on the ways and the extent to which other factors impact on the construction of support. The main factors recognisable here are presence (vs. distance), media, time and space. 8.4

Being there: co-presence and changing support

The extent to which a relative or friend's support is perceived as mobile depends on the individual’s previous experience of that support and on the current context. One of the variables involved in the construction of the support is distance, the variable that enables or inhibits physical co-presence. However, distance itself is also constructed in relation to barriers or facilitations such as means of communication, means of transport and time differences, among other things. Although support can be provided from a distance, the interviewees do adhere to the assumption that support might more

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easily be provided by physically co-present others, e.g. fellow students. The question remains of why support from a distance is considered a lesser form of support to proximate support, or even not considered to be support at all. One explanation for this can be found in the respective party’s expectations of the support they can provide and receive. If they expect the support they used to receive or provide earlier to stay the same even though the context, the distance or the availability has changed, then the support is perceived to have decreased or be lacking completely. If, by contrast, the support is allowed to adapt, then the issue of co-presence is not as relevant (e.g. the parents’ nurturing role can be modified and therefore be perceived as similarly supportive, although they are no longer co-present). As described in the previous chapters, the students experience the provision and reception of support in various ways in different situations in life, sometimes created or influenced by transnational migration. Specific kinds of support are chosen in order to match a person's needs to the resources available. When (though not only when) co-presence is impossible, support is mediated virtually (via information and communication technology, ICT) or using less tangible strategies such as praying for someone. Apart from expressing interest and care, the act of praying and, for example, writing emails or messages also fulfils a phatic function: it establishes and sustains social contact and shares or cultivates feelings. As considered previously, virtually mediated support plays a major role, and virtual co-presence stands side by side with physical co-presence, although virtual forms may often be viewed by both providers and receivers of support as a lesser version of physical forms, and less valuable or effective. However, the cases considered here call for a review of that perception. Physical distance and its virtual bridging do have an impact on support and care and may alter them radically, as

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discussed above. The process is a challenge, since it requires a certain degree of flexibility from all parties. In time, though, it can lead to the development of new forms of support. When invoking the increased opportunity to maintain contact with distant important people and the manifold alternatives to copresent support in the modern day, it is necessary also to consider the consequentially increased expectation to keep in touch. Though people keep in touch virtually, the relationships in the students’ networks differ in terms of their ability to accommodate travel. Not all contacts and entities can or are willing to be mobile, neither are the students themselves always willing or (e.g. financially) capable of being mobile to provide support to important alters elsewhere. Migrating students’ difficulty in providing support to those they have departed from can lead to expectations not being met, to disappointment and friction. Students may feel they are failing to fulfil not only their own expectations, but also those of the people they have left behind. Support which used to be bidirectional may become unidirectional, restricted or hampered by the move, and the student who has gone abroad to study may feel they cannot support their family any longer in the way they wish to, as mentioned in Agnieszka’s, Luis Alberto’s and Terezia’s narratives. One compromise for all the parties involved is for the student and their distant important alters to accept the changed circumstances, provide whatever support can be offered from a distance and trust and make sure that new supportive relationships can be established locally, as described in the following. Akemi misses her family and her relatives feel impotent due to the distance between them. Over time, she develops alternative forms of support and states “you have to make your own support system on your own in this new land and I think * i=in the process you get stronger” (Akemi Osaka). Time plays an important role: during what Akemi calls “the process”,

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which lasts a certain period of time, what at first seems to be an insurmountable problem is then reinterpreted as being a challenge. Once accepted, this challenge leads her to a major insight: “if all goes wEll, then you can learn more about yourself and ** it’s hard but you can establish * who you truly are” (Akemi Osaka). Besides being perceived as creating friction, changes in support and in the existing support systems are reinterpreted as leading to new insights about herself. The support found in the relationships in international students’ networks is manifold and closely related to the dimensions of beings, belongings and places within which the relationships occur. The issue of translocality plays a role in the ways international students perceive and experience (provide and receive) support, as they describe important relationships to various entities that are geographically near or far, flexible or fixed, and mediated with ease or with difficulty.

9

Finally … from international students to transnational study

When discussing the beings, belongings, places and different kinds of support which international students describe in their accounts, this study adopted a transnational relational approach. This perspective aims to shift the focus from the individual international student to the relationships which are relevant in their everyday lives, moving away from the idea that the individual students have deficiencies which need to be eradicated. Instead, it focuses on acknowledging how the relationships in students’ networks, involving a number of different entities, can create environments and situations that are or are not perceived as supportive. Nevertheless, while this approach is fruitful, as long as the discourse on international students is situated within migration studies, the focus will remain on their otherness, and the need for them to integrate and adjust. To sidestep this, the idea of mobility – not only of people but also of understandings and knowledge – is also being adopted in this field of research. This is leading to a shift from seeing students’ mobility as within restricting, locally and nationally defined spaces, to seeing them as moving within malleable, transnational and unbounded spaces and to widening orbits offering a multitude of opportunities, which go far beyond current understandings of the aim and the ends of internationalisation. As discussed above, transnationalism and translocality are omnipresent in international students’ everyday lives. They understand and describe relationships, knowledge, support, plans and activities in transnational and translocal terms. But while it is an everyday reality to them, this understanding is not yet rooted in the realm of education. Still, international students, as members of HEIs, clearly

© The Editor(s) (if applicable) and The Author(s), under exclusive license to Springer Fachmedien Wiesbaden GmbH, part of Springer Nature 2020 A. Altissimo, Beings, Belongings and Places, Wissenschaft – Hochschule – Bildung, https://doi.org/10.1007/978-3-658-31364-7_9

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contribute to creating transnational spaces within, through and around HEIs. The question therefore is not how the students might become better integrated into the national HEIs, as transnationalism and integration clearly co-exist (cf. Erdal, 2013). Nor is it about increasing the numbers of international students, since this increases an HEI’s income and reputation but does not automatically lead to its internationalisation in the sense implied here. Rather, the question which this study sheds light on is that of how HEIs can take into account international students and their transnational interconnectedness in their everyday institutional activities and routines, and how they can even foster this interconnectedness. By contextualising international students as transnationally connected, this study also shows how the institutions they are currently studying at are actually far more widely connected than they (the HEIs themselves) may acknowledge. The perspective presented here includes the students’ connections to people, organisations, activities, ideas etc. in various places, among others the place where they are currently studying. To the international students, their relationships both in and to the current country and in and to their country or countries of origin are important in their everyday lives. Their beings and belongings are intersected by connections to various places, a phenomenon which is not yet included in the institutional perspective on the internationalisation of HEIs. Further, although the interviewees were all studying at the time of the interview, the higher education institutions themselves did not emerge as particularly important or supportive entities in the students’ networks. Only in some cases were offers specifically targeted at international students mentioned as contexts in which supportive relations were established and maintained (i.e. foci). The fact that the students rarely mention HEIs and related entities

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as relevant and supportive in their everyday life mirrors the fact that the HEIs do not take international students’ everyday lives as such into consideration. As international students’ important relationships span the transnationally characterised dimensions of beings, belongings and places, when looking for ways to best support international students, HEIs need to consider envisaging these relationships in their transnationalism and translocality. In times when theoretical and practical knowledge is produced across all kinds of borders, “universities need to be places which enable translation, hybridities, multiplicities and flows” (Doherty and Singh, 2008, p. 110). HEIs doing this would facilitate transnational knowledge creation and idea-sharing. For this to be possible, however, there is a need for resources, i.e. both concrete and ideal institutional spaces, including a variety of learning models. To Valiente (2008), such models bear potential for synergies and fruitful discussion as long as "the education of teachers, students and institutions on a variety of cultural and internationalization issues" (p. 87) is given. Viewing students as an integral part of HEIs and seeing the transnationalism in their networks leads to the realisation that HEIs’ internationalisation cannot be fostered only by increasing numbers of cooperative projects and exchanges, if space for the coproduction of knowledge is not consciously created. As a consequence, Madge, Raghuram and Noxolo (2015) recommend thinking in terms of international study instead of international students, thereby focussing on collective versus individualised understandings of the creation of knowledge, and on knowledge circulation instead of flows of people. Based on these reflections and on this study’s findings, I suggest taking Madge et al.’s proposal one step further and discussing transnational study, giving a name to the

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multitude and intertwinement of spaces in which knowledge is shared and co-produced.

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Annex: Questions for interviews with network maps 1 Opening • General information about the study (if not clarified earlier) and introduction to the topic of the interview: i.e. PhD project on international students’ networks. • Informed consent 2 Stimulus for narration Could you please tell me something about yourself in general? Follow-up questions: a) Could you tell me something about your everyday life? b) What are you doing/studying/working as (here)? Why? c) How long have you been living/working/studying here? d) Where else have you lived/worked/what else have you studied? 3 Important alters Could you please name a few relationships that are important to you? • You can name people, places, organisations, things, ideas, points in time, activities, abstract facts, etc. • Could you please write them down on these sticky notes, stick them on the map and describe why or how they are important. • Imagine you are the circle in the middle. Please place them on the map closer or farther away from you, depending on how important they are to you.

© The Editor(s) (if applicable) and The Author(s), under exclusive license to Springer Fachmedien Wiesbaden GmbH, part of Springer Nature 2020 A. Altissimo, Beings, Belongings and Places, Wissenschaft – Hochschule – Bildung, https://doi.org/10.1007/978-3-658-31364-7

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Follow-up questions: a) b) c) d)

Please tell me something/more about this relationship. What makes the relationship important to you? How is it important to you? Is there a specific element in your relationship that sets it apart? e) What connects you with this person/place/group/organisation, etc.? f) What do you share with this person/place/group, etc.? g) How did this relationship come into being? h) How do you maintain this relationship? Are any relationships not on the map, although you would like them to be on the map? Is an important relationship missing, because someone/something is currently missing in your network/life? Recurring question: Do you want to add anything to the map? 4 Connections between alters Are these (people, places, organizations, things, ideas, points in time, activities, abstract facts, etc., depending on what is on the map) connected to each other somehow? How? • Are there any particularly strong, intense, difficult, problematic, etc. relationships between them? •

Are any of these not connected, although you would prefer them to be connected?

•

Are any of these connected, although you would prefer them not to be connected?

Annex: Questions for interviews with network maps

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5 Concluding questions • If you look at this map now, is everything you want to be on it here? •

Is there anything else you would like to add about any relationships?

•

What do you think when you look at the map now?