Time, Freedom and the Self: The Cultural Construction of “Free” Time [1st ed.] 978-3-030-13840-0;978-3-030-13841-7

Table of contents :
Front Matter ....Pages i-xiii
Introduction (Michelle Shir-Wise)....Pages 1-8
Free Time, Culture and the Self (Michelle Shir-Wise)....Pages 9-52
What Is Topaz? (Michelle Shir-Wise)....Pages 53-69
Conceptual Mapping: What Is Free Time? (Michelle Shir-Wise)....Pages 71-94
Quantitative Mapping and Subjective Mapping: Free Time in Practice (Michelle Shir-Wise)....Pages 95-132
The Productive Self (Michelle Shir-Wise)....Pages 133-159
The Consuming Self (Michelle Shir-Wise)....Pages 161-217
The Social Self (Michelle Shir-Wise)....Pages 219-276
The Meaningful Self (Michelle Shir-Wise)....Pages 277-300
Contradictory Free Time, Culture and Freedom (Michelle Shir-Wise)....Pages 301-337
Back Matter ....Pages 339-371

Citation preview

LEISURE STUDIES IN A GLOBAL ERA

Time, Freedom and the Self

The Cultural Construction of “Free” Time Michelle Shir-Wise

Leisure Studies in a Global Era Series Editors Karl Spracklen Leeds Beckett University Leeds, UK Karen Fox University of Alberta Edmonton, AB, Canada

In this book series, we defend leisure as a meaningful, theoretical, framing concept; and critical studies of leisure as a worthwhile intellectual and pedagogical activity. This is what makes this book series distinctive: we want to enhance the discipline of leisure studies and open it up to a richer range of ideas; and, conversely, we want sociology, cultural geographies and other social sciences and humanities to open up to engaging with critical and rigorous arguments from leisure studies. Getting beyond concerns about the grand project of leisure, we will use the series to demonstrate that leisure theory is central to understanding wider debates about identity, postmodernity and globalisation in contemporary societies across the world. The series combines the search for local, qualitatively rich accounts of everyday leisure with the international reach of debates in politics, leisure and social and cultural theory. In doing this, we will show that critical studies of leisure can and should continue to play a central role in understanding society. The scope will be global, striving to be truly international and truly diverse in the range of authors and topics. Editorial Board John Connell, Professor of Geography, University of Sydney, USA Yoshitaka Mori, Associate Professor, Tokyo University of the Arts, Japan Smitha Radhakrishnan, Assistant Professor, Wellesley College, USA Diane M. Samdahl, Professor of Recreation and Leisure Studies, University of Georgia, USA Chiung-Tzu Lucetta Tsai, Associate Professor, National Taipei University, Taiwan Walter van Beek, Professor of Anthropology and Religion, Tilburg University, The Netherlands Sharon D. Welch, Professor of Religion and Society, Meadville Theological School, Chicago, USA Leslie Witz, Professor of History, University of the Western Cape, South Africa. More information about this series at http://www.palgrave.com/series/14823

Michelle Shir-Wise

Time, Freedom and the Self The Cultural Construction of “Free” Time

Michelle Shir-Wise Independent Researcher Ramat Gan, Israel

Leisure Studies in a Global Era ISBN 978-3-030-13840-0 ISBN 978-3-030-13841-7  (eBook) https://doi.org/10.1007/978-3-030-13841-7 Library of Congress Control Number: 2019932931 © The Editor(s) (if applicable) and The Author(s), under exclusive license to Springer Nature Switzerland AG 2019 This work is subject to copyright. All rights are solely and exclusively licensed by the Publisher, whether the whole or part of the material is concerned, specifically the rights of translation, reprinting, reuse of illustrations, recitation, broadcasting, reproduction on microfilms or in any other physical way, and transmission or information storage and retrieval, electronic adaptation, computer software, or by similar or dissimilar methodology now known or hereafter developed. The use of general descriptive names, registered names, trademarks, service marks, etc. in this publication does not imply, even in the absence of a specific statement, that such names are exempt from the relevant protective laws and regulations and therefore free for general use. The publisher, the authors and the editors are safe to assume that the advice and information in this book are believed to be true and accurate at the date of publication. Neither the publisher nor the authors or the editors give a warranty, express or implied, with respect to the material contained herein or for any errors or omissions that may have been made. The publisher remains neutral with regard to jurisdictional claims in published maps and institutional affiliations. Cover illustration: © Photicon/Alamy Stock Photo This Palgrave Macmillan imprint is published by the registered company Springer Nature Switzerland AG The registered company address is: Gewerbestrasse 11, 6330 Cham, Switzerland

Acknowledgements

I would like to acknowledge the generous support of The President’s Scholarship for Excellence at Bar-Ilan University, Israel. I am thankful to a number of people, who helped at various stages of my research and during the writing of this book. I am indebted to my Ph.D. supervisor, Professor Ilana Friedrich Silber from the Department of Sociology at Bar-Ilan University, for her thoroughness, for sharing her wisdom, and for teaching me to view my work with a critical eye. My deepest thanks goes to Professor Dalia Gavriely-Nuri, for her encouragement and support, her valuable advice and for making sure I never lost sight of my goal. I also wish to thank the various members of the faculty in the Sociology Department at Bar-Ilan University; Professor Orly Benjamin, Dr. Ori Schwarz, Dr. Michal Pagis, Dr. Galit Ailon and Dr. Shira Offer, for their guidance and assistance at different stages of my research. Thanks to the editorial staff at Palgrave Macmillan; to Mary Al-Sayed, the commissioning editor, whose professionalism and efficiency made it a pleasure to work with her, to Linda Braus, for her help, and to the production team for their precision. I also wish to thank the series editor, Karl Spracklen for his confidence in the book and the reviewers, for their enthusiasm and constructive comments. I wish to express my gratitude to Dr. Avihu Shoshana, for his insightful guidance which supported my first steps in sociological research, and for his encouragement to pursue further research. v

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Acknowledgements

I am deeply grateful to my husband and children for believing in me, to my sisters for always being there, and to my loving parents who have been a source of inspiration and taught me the value of critical thinking and social responsibility. Lastly, I am indebted to the participants of this study who generously shared their time, thoughts and knowledge with me, without which this book would not have been possible.

Contents

1 Introduction 1 Overview of the Book 6 2

Free Time, Culture and the Self 9 Leisure and Time Use 9 Individualism and the Contemporary Self 16 Time, Consumption and the Self 19 Time, Media Technology and the Self 20 Time, Happiness and Freedom 23 Culture, Freedom and the Question of Agency 27 The Study 31 The Israeli Middle Class Context 32 Theoretical Concepts 37 Objectives of the Book 38 References 40

3

What Is Topaz? 53 Topaz Through the Eyes of Local Figures 55 A Family Town 56 Middle Plus 58 Harmony: Religious and Irreligious 62 Local Texts 64

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Contents

A Smorgasbord of Activities and Events 64 Scripts of Success, Family and Community 65 References 68 4

Conceptual Mapping: What Is Free Time? 71 Free Time and the Free Self 71 Freedom From 72 Freedom from Work and Obligations 72 The Enemies of Free Time 74 Freedom To 85 Choice, Agency and Control 85 Time for the Self 87 Concrete Illustrations of Free Time 89 Discussion 90 References 93

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Quantitative Mapping and Subjective Mapping: Free Time in Practice 95 Quantitative Mapping: What, Where, When and with Whom? 95 Habitual Practices 95 Family Time 100 Social Time 101 Subjective Mapping: The Hierarchization of Free Time 104 Relaxation: Freedom From 105 Pleasure: Freedom To 110 The Hierarchization of Free Time 116 Imagined Free Time: What Would You Do If…? 119 Discussion 126 References 130

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The Productive Self 133 The Busy Self 134 The Vocabulary of Control and Choice 135 Multitasking: Maximizing Time 137 The Managed Self 141 Wasting Time and Self-Discipline 141 Bodywork and the Self-Gaze 143 The Therapeutic Self 148

Contents   

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Reflexivity, Crossroads and Change 148 Self-Improvement and the Self-Made Self 151 Discussion 153 References 158 7

The Consuming Self 161 The Commercialization of Free Time 161 Expert Services 162 Shopping 163 Outings 172 Imagined Consumption: What Would You Do If…? 173 Discussion 175 Media and Free Time 178 Television 180 Computers 191 Cellphones 198 Modes of Resistance 204 Discussion 211 References 215

8

The Social Self 219 The Family Self 220 Free Time with One’s Spouse 220 Free Time with the Family 229 Quality Time 239 Gender Roles 247 Discussion 248 The Sociable Self 253 Sociability: Pleasure and Value 254 Sites for Socializing 261 Discussion 268 References 272

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The Meaningful Self 277 Pleasure Versus Happiness 278 Family as a Source of Happiness 279 Giving 284

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Contents

Happiness in the “Simple Things” 288 Self-Oriented Happiness 290 The Big Picture 291 Discussion 295 References 298 10 Contradictory Free Time, Culture and Freedom 301 Conceptualizing Free Time 301 The Free Time Self 302 Free Time in Context 308 Differences: Religiosity and Gender 310 Contradictory Free Time 314 Pleasure/Meaningfulness 314 The Time Pressure/Free Time Paradox 315 The Isolated Self/The Social Self 317 Frames of Interpretation and Discursive Contradictions 318 Freedom and Individualism 319 Capitalism, the Work Ethic and the Therapeutic Ethos 320 Consumer Culture, the Therapeutic Ethos and Hedonism 321 Therapeutic Discourse, Familism and Collectivism 323 Conclusions: Is Free Time Really Free? 326 References 332 Appendix A: Research Methods 339 Appendix B: Selected Demographic Characteristics of Sample 347 Index 349

About

the

Author

Michelle Shir-Wise holds a Ph.D. from the Department of Sociology and Anthropology, Bar-Ilan University, Israel. Past projects have examined representations of self in television commercials. Her research interests include time use, culture, the self, consumption, media, class, gender, youth and ageism.

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List of Tables

Table 5.1 Table 5.2 Table 5.3 Table 5.4 Table 5.5 Table 5.6 Table 5.7 Table 5.8

Regular free time activities Free time media use and reading with subcategories Hobbies and enrichment classes/sessions Personal care Free time with others and alone Types of activities with others Outings Typology of positive free time

96 97 99 99 100 102 102 129

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CHAPTER 1

Introduction

It is a Saturday morning in spring as the sun shines generously through the burgeoning leaves of the trees that rejuvenate the park. In the wavering patchwork of light and shade, a father helps his son climb the ladder up to the slide, shoulder hunched, cellphone nestled habitually in the crook of his neck. When the child reaches the bottom, he emits a shriek of glee, searching his father’s face, which discloses obliviousness to the boy’s excitement. The father is now absorbed in a text message demanding his prompt attention. There appears to be nothing particularly unusual about the above scene. Yet, this potentially ideal snapshot of free time, much like others that I have observed, has made me wonder about the way in which people use and experience free time and to what extent it is indeed “free.” I often hear people complaining about their crammed schedules saying, “I don’t have time.” But what is meant by this commonly heard phrase? Does it mean time for the family, time for oneself or simply an opportunity to do what one chooses? And is our free time really a matter of free choice? I asked myself how people feel about their free time and why they perform certain practices. Perhaps free time is not simply aimed at pleasure. Could it also be a site for self-management? I frequently see people walking or jogging energetically, checking their watches or phone apps as they do so. I wonder, is sport considered part of their free time or is it treated as yet another chore on a long list of daily requirements? Why are we constantly rushed, and lured to a plethora of devices promising © The Author(s) 2019 M. Shir-Wise, Time, Freedom and the Self, Leisure Studies in a Global Era, https://doi.org/10.1007/978-3-030-13841-7_1

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to save time though they may actually consume more and more of our time? People seem to be forever time-pressured, yet watch television for hours. How can these contradictions be explained? These questions led me to embark on the research on which this book is based. I wanted to gain deeper insight into how people experience and evaluate free time, what motivates practices in that regard, and how cultural repertoires available to them are related to the way they talk and think about free time. What do people feel about that time? Do they think about it in terms of freedom? And if so, by investigating free time, could we learn what people consider worth doing? I hoped that the exploration of free time would thus reveal what is highly valued in our culture and how free time is related to the self. Put differently, if people decide to pursue certain activities during that part of the day they consider to be “free,” could their choices reflect cultural ideals of self or notions of worthy time use? We are all caught in the flow of everyday life, putting little thought into why we spend our time as we do, whether it is a daily ritual that seems mundane or other activities that feel more meaningful. What motivates us to perform certain free time practices? Why are some activities more highly valued than others? To what extent is free time culturally constructed? Time Freedom and the Self seeks to illuminate questions concerning individual agency in the face of cultural and discursive constructs, which are likely to shape, not only the way we use our time, but also how we perceive and experience it. In other words, while I use the term “free time,” I do not mean that the individual is entirely free to make choices. Rather, I recognize the role of sociocultural influences that may direct one’s actions and shape subjective meanings despite the common association of free time with freedom. In order to explore the above, I interviewed 43 men and women living in an upper-middle class town located in central Israel. Since I, myself, am a resident of a satellite town of Tel Aviv, the sample of the study may seem somewhat too close for comfort. Indeed, as I embarked on the current journey into free time, I wondered about the extent of my ability to examine the field from the point of view of a researcher looking in on the subject of interest from the outside. However, much like a participant-observer in ethnographic studies, I believe that my intimate familiarity with the field helped me better understand the social reality of my participants. Moreover, the fact that I have raised children and been involved in the communal and cultural life of a suburban community in Israel is likely to have given me extra insight into widely

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accepted practices in everyday middle class life. Nevertheless, ­ hoping to shed light on meanings behind taken-for-granted free time routines, I, as researcher made a conscious effort to take on an outsider’s perspective. My challenge was to give voice to people’s thoughts and feelings, and address the question of freedom without assuming preconceived ideas of the individual as utter cultural dope, nor presupposing a fully autonomous agent. As a sociologist, my intent was to listen with a critical ear, aiming at digging deeper, beyond taken-for-granted conceptions and practices of free time. This book presents the insights resulting from this search. It is shaped by the voices of 43 individuals who willingly shared their thoughts and feelings about their experience and perceptions of free time so as to allow a deeper understanding of questions related to time, freedom and selfhood in the context of culture. *** When we think and talk about time, we relate to it as though it is tangible, something that we can spend, save or put away for another day. We treat it as a rare commodity as we do money. There never seems to be enough of it and what we have, is expected to be used wisely. Yet we are constantly afraid of wasting time so we attempt to regulate it in order to utilize it efficiently. Time-management is thus considered commendable, a means of control over this ever-elusive element in our lives. However, time does not behave as a concrete substance and the more we try to contain it, the less we are able to do so, resulting in a heightened sense of frustration and time pressure. In order to control and manage our time, modernity has provided us with a wide array of inventions and technology. Domestic timesaving machines and devices, from pressure-cookers and washing machines to vacuum cleaners and microwaves, were all intended to give us greater control over our time and allow us more free more time for pleasure or activities of our choice. Indeed, much of modern technology promises to make our lives easier precisely by saving time, speed being a central selling point. We are coaxed into upgrading our mobile phones and computers to the latest models so as to save ourselves only fractions of seconds. However, all these inventions have not necessarily contributed to a more relaxed lifestyle. On the contrary, multitasking, time-management, busyness and productivity have become the catchwords of contemporary life. We seem to be constantly rushing around trying to squeeze as much as possible into our heavy schedules.

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Perhaps then, time cannot really be managed at all. Neither can it be saved. It seems to me that the concept of time calls for metaphoric descriptions that are amorphous, not countable or concrete. Time may be more like gas that dissipates in the air, or, possibly, like a vacuum that constantly needs to be filled. It is like the seeds of a dandelion, ironically called clocks, that scatter in the wind, some of which may prove to be productive but some of which, may not. Although we want to think about time as containable, it is difficult to find a satisfactory metaphor, precisely because it is obscure and full of contradictions. We have become obsessed with time management, but rather than calming us by satisfying our need to control, it seems to have exacerbated the inner tensions brought about by the expectations of productivity and busyness, of constant activity and movement. It is no longer legitimate to just sit at a bus stop and observe passersby, or stand in line at the supermarket looking around. The fear of idleness and, perhaps, being perceived as being idle, makes us busy ourselves on our smartphones, constantly checking and rechecking our messages or simply browsing through our phones so that we feel as though we are doing something with our time. Every minute must be utilized and managed. It is no wonder then, that a Google search of the words time management, gives us millions of results. These include articles, study guides, lectures, training workshops, videos and self-help books that promise to provide tips on how to “manage your time better,”1 “achieve more and be more effective”2 or “work less and play more.”3 Books with intriguing names like “Eat That Frog,” offer “ways to stop procrastinating and get more done in less time,”4 while other books promise to teach us “How to Be a Productivity Ninja,”5 or “The Art of Stress-Free Productivity.”6 Is this need for efficiency and productivity a new phenomenon or is it simply becoming more pronounced because of modern technology that places so much emphasis on speed and results? I remember when I was a teenager, my grandmother, a widow in her late 70s, used to spend time in our home. She would say repeatedly, “please give me something to do.” It was not a hobby or pleasure that she sought. She simply wanted to do something she considered useful, like sewing, folding washing or chopping vegetables. She would say, “I’m not going to just sit here with my arms crossed.” Only when my mother succumbed to her request and gave her something productive to do, did she finally feel better. So, perhaps a need for productivity and busyness is not anything new. My grandmother had always been a busy person, running a household and

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caring for her large family. However, unlike today, she did not have all the modern conveniences, which supposedly allow us more time. This brings us to the widely discussed question of time pressure, which we read and hear about in the media, as well as in time use research. Why do we seem to be so rushed despite modern technology designed to save us time? What makes us feel time-pressured even though studies indicate that we work less than in the past? And why do people say that they have very little free time despite evidence from time use reports that suggest otherwise? Indeed, after beginning the study, when friends asked what I was researching and I told them that the subject of my work was “free time,” the most common reaction, said facetiously, was “What’s that?” Another response, expressed by many in a wistful tone was, “I wish I had free time.” Why did people react this way? What causes us to feel we don’t have enough time and why do people wish for free time? Perhaps it is the very notion of scarcity as compared to work and other committed time that makes that time particularly appealing. Using a more tangible metaphor after all, free time is like diamonds that are rare and precious. And the less there is of something, the more we seem to want it. But is the valorization of free time only due to its scarcity? In this book, I suggest that there may be an additional, and possibly even more significant factor that makes free time so widely desired and valued. It seems to me that it is the notion of freedom that contributes greatly to its elevated status. In contrast to time use in general that is associated with efficiency and productivity, free time is perceived as a realm of freedom where we can choose to simply relax, pursue pleasure or invest in the self. If free time is considered a matter of choice, it may also be an integral part of how we define ourselves, reflecting sociocultural standards, which have been internalized, and which we use in the management of our daily lives. Time, Freedom and the Self thus seeks to explore how free time is used, experienced and valued, focusing on the relationship between time, the construction of selfhood and cultural repertoires. I treat time use, specifically free time, as a tool with which to gain a deeper understanding into the ways individuals manage the self, as I direct my attention to the meanings of actions and how culture shapes these meanings in everyday life. The need to research free time is becoming more and more compelling due to changes in contemporary life. The increase in the amount of free time in recent decades is a trend that is likely to continue into the future, given the advancement of technological devices that save time, the rise of technological unemployment and an increase in life expectancy.

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The current exploration of free time hopes to offer insight into the intricate nexus between time use, freedom, culture and the self, by addressing a number of questions. What is defined as free time? When is time considered well spent and what is deemed a waste of time? What do our pastimes reveal about contemporary discourses concerning how we manage our selves and our time? What motivates our free time practices? To what extent do they serve the individual’s need for pleasure, or search for happiness, and what is their role in the construction of the self? Time, Freedom and the Self presents an examination of free time in the Israeli context, uncovering how individuals perceive, interpret and experience free time, while addressing broader questions about selfhood and how culture works in everyday life.

Overview of the Book7 Chapter 2 of the book provides a theoretical background and presents a review of the literature relevant to the central issues with which the book is concerned. By positioning my research within the framework of literature on time use, the self, freedom, culture and discourses, I present my own perspective and how it is hoped to add to existing scholarship in these fields. In addition, I introduce the terms the hierarchization of free time, disciplined freedom, and conspicuous busyness, theoretical concepts that I offer in order to analyze various aspects of free time. The chapter briefly describes the methods used (a detailed explanation is provided in the appendix), discusses the context of the study and concludes with the rationale and objectives of the book. The following chapters present the findings, beginning with Chapter 3 that outlines the central characteristics of the town Topaz, as well as its free time activities and dominant narratives, as these emerged in interviews with key local figures and in local texts. This chapter is intended to give the reader a sense of the town and the lifestyle of its residents. This is followed by Chapter 4, a Conceptual Mapping of free time based on participants’ definitions. It explores how participants differentiate free time from other time, what characterizes that time and how they feel about the way they spend their time. The chapter reveals the centrality of freedom in their conceptions of free time, distinguishing between freedom from external constraints and freedom to choose to do as one wishes. Chapter 5 is divided into two sections. The first section (“Quantitative Mapping: What, Where, When and with Whom?”) presents the

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quantitative findings from the questionnaires, showing how and with whom participants spend their free time, the frequency of these activities, and the amount of time spent on each. The chapter presents tables with descriptive data regarding the various types of activities, serving to provide the reader with an overall picture of participants’ free time use. The second section (“Subjective Mapping: The Hierarchization of Free Time”) focuses on subjective meaning relating to the hierarchization of free time as described by participants. This term refers to the ways in which individuals assess and classify their free time according to the perceived value of a practice. The chapter inquires into the experience, motivation and evaluation of free time, exploring positively valued and desired free time practices. It looks at why certain activities are experienced as such as well as examining responses to hypothetical questions related to potential, imagined free time. The following chapters move from the conceptual and subjective mappings of free time to an exploration of various facets of self that emerged in relation to free time. Chapter 6 focuses on the link between free time and discourses of productivity, questioning the traditional distinction between work and free time. It examines the language and activities related to time management and the self-project. The concept, disciplined freedom is offered here as a conceptual tool with which to explore the contradictory nature of self-management practices that were seen as freedom to invest in the self, yet guided by ideals of hard work and self-discipline. The chapter also offers the term, conspicuous busyness to refer to the display of busyness as an integral part of self-presentation as a productive individual. Chapter 7 examines consumption in free time, investigating various practices and what motivates participants to perform them. The first section (“The Commercialization of Free Time”) explores The Commercialization of Free Time, looking at the consumption of services, many of which are related to self-work, as well as other practices, such as shopping or outings. It focuses, not only on what participants do, but also on how they feel about various types of consumption. The second section (“Media and Free Time”) looks into the consumption of media. It investigates the subjective experience of media practices as a dominant part of daily routine, revealing participants’ motives and paradoxical evaluations. It also presents modes of resistance, indicated by participants. Chapter 8 looks at The Social Self, as it explores free time associated with family, friends and community. The first section (“The Family Self ”)

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focuses on family time, including everyday time, weekends and special ­occasions, and uncovers participants’ conceptions of relationships, parenting and values. The chapter also addresses gender roles and the notion of quality time. The second section (“The Sociable Self”) relates to social interaction, friendships and social outings. The chapter looks at sites for socializing as well as the meanings attached to social relationships and practices. Chapter 9 (“The Meaningful Self”) addresses the question of meaningfulness. It explores arenas of happiness, such as family or volunteering, indicated by participants. The chapter distinguishes between pleasure and happiness, the second found to be linked to values and meaning. The final Chapter 10 (“Contradictory Free Time, Culture and Freedom”) summarizes and discusses the findings of the study, which suggested the impact of conflicting discourses and cultural scripts, competing in shaping participants’ subjective understandings and experience of free time as well as conceptions of the self. The discussion puts special emphasis on discursive contradictions and the question of freedom in free time, looking at how culture is used to direct actions and shape meanings related to free time and the self.

Notes 1. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VUk6LXRZMMk. 2. https://www.mindtools.com/pages/main/newMN_HTE.htm. 3. https://toggl.com/time-management-tips. 4. Tracy, Brian. 2007. Eat That Frog: 21 Great Ways to Stop Procrastinating and Get More Done in Less Time. San Francisco: Berrett-Koehler Publishers. 5.  Allcott, Graham. 2014. How to Be a Productivity Ninja: Worry Less, Achieve More and Love What You Do. London: Icon Books. 6.  Allen, David. 2015. Getting Things Done: The Art of Stress-Free Productivity. New York: Penguin. 7. Regarding the structure of the book, even though the chapters follow one another in logical progression, they are modular in so far as they can also be read individually. The last chapter, however, draws conclusions that are based on the findings presented throughout the book. Additionally, unlike many books that interweave their findings with past literature, I have attempted, as much as possible, to present the findings without the “interference” of references. Instead, I refer to the literature in the summary and discussion at the end of each chapter, so as to allow a “clean” presentation of the findings in a more narrative style.

CHAPTER 2

Free Time, Culture and the Self

Leisure and Time Use There seems to be no area of contemporary life that is associated with individual freedom as much as that part of the day we generally call “free time.” Yet the link between leisure and freedom is not a modern notion. Plato (in Laws, Book 7) and Aristotle (in Nicomachean Ethics) viewed leisure as freedom from work or other necessities, but also as a time when one is free to pursue activities of the soul and engage in contemplation. Sebastian De Grazia (1962) suggests that leisure was “discovered” in classical Greece, and that it had not existed before. The term leisure originates from the Greek schole, the idea of freedom being central to its meaning (Hunnicutt 1990; Pieper 2009; Russell 2013; Sager 2013). Leisure was conceived as a time that could and should be devoted to valuable activities for both the mind and the body and Plato advocated education in order to prepare citizens for such a life (Hunnicutt 1990; Sager 2013). Indeed, the Greek word schole is also the root of the modern word school. In his well-known essay entitled, Leisure: The Basis of Culture, Joseph Pieper (1952/2009) refers to this common root of the words leisure and school as evidence that leisure is one of the foundations of Western culture (p. 19). Yet, he says, its original meaning has been almost forgotten in modern life, which overvalues work. While work is thought of as activity, leisure is generally considered non-activity, having taken on the negative connotation of idleness, which, Pieper suggests, is in fact the “opposite of leisure.” He argues that leisure is not © The Author(s) 2019 M. Shir-Wise, Time, Freedom and the Self, Leisure Studies in a Global Era, https://doi.org/10.1007/978-3-030-13841-7_2

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simply free time, but a “condition of the soul,” “a mental and spiritual attitude.” Echoing the classical ideal of leisure as a space of freedom, Pieper claims that it is precisely the absence of activity that allows the individual to let go and reflect upon reality (p. 46). Today we relate to leisure as residual time that is free from work or other commitments such as childcare or domestic chores. However, the classical Greeks, who considered leisure worthy for its own sake, defined work as askolia, the absence of leisure, which was a desirable goal to be pursued (Hunnicutt 1990; Sager 2013). The Greek ideal of leisure had a moral quality and its aim was virtuous action (Hemingway 1996; Hunnicut 2006). Plato was critical of those who worked more than necessary, seeing this as an obstacle to leisure, which he considered to be freedom, so that working too much would be like refusing to take freedom when it is available (Hunnicutt 1990). For Plato and Aristotle, leisure was not idleness, but rather the freedom to maximize human potential and achieve authenticity (Hunnicut 2006). This privilege was exclusive to the male upper classes to whom, unlike slaves, workers and women, leisure time was more readily available (Russell 2013; Sager 2013). De Grazia (1962) argued that, unlike the modern conception of leisure as time left after duties and necessities, the classical idea of living a higher life saw leisure as a sin qua non for the good life, whereas work was seen as a necessity to survive. Contemplation, he pointed out, was the ultimate in leisure so that anything that hindered the freedom to contemplate truth and meaning in the world, also prevented achieving the greatest good. The Greeks differentiated between leisure, amusement (paidia) and recreation (anapausis), the first involving activities that are considered valuable in themselves, whereas the latter two served as respite (Sager 2013). The modern concept of leisure or free time includes all three definitions, as we shall see. Ruth Russell (2013) points out that the Greek emphasis on both the mind and the body was manifest in intellectual and artistic pursuits as well as sports. Similarly, the Romans pursued a variety of recreational pastimes, though Seneca, too, distinguished leisure from “idle occupation.” The first, he says is when one is free to dedicate oneself to philosophy, whereas the second involves hedonic activities, which, he sees, as making one “restless” (Seneca, 49 ACE/2005). The ancient emphasis on contemplation continued with the rise of Christianity, particularly in monastic life, where spiritual life was highly valued (Veal 2004). In the late medieval period and early Renaissance, the approach to leisure began to change as instrumental reasoning

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came to be more highly regarded than theoretical contemplation (Sager 2013). But perhaps the most significant change in the conception of leisure came about with the rise of Protestantism and a dramatic shift in the attitude to work, which was considered to be a “calling.” In Max Weber’s (1930/1992) monumental work, The Protestant Ethic and the Spirit of Capitalism, the “work ethic” is indicated as the basis for the formation of modern capitalism. Calvanism, he says, encouraged hard work, and economic success was considered to be a Divine “sign.” The accumulation of wealth was sanctioned as long as it was not used for worldly pleasures, so that leisure came to be associated with idleness. Edward Thompson (1967) suggests that capitalism also changed the very understanding of time. The appearance of clocks and the industrial revolution, says Thompson, gave rise to more rigid time routines and greater work-discipline. Working hours and production increased, making goods more accessible to the masses. The idea of material rewards resulting from hard work, transformed people’s hopes and lifestyles (Veal 2004). Still, as in classical Greece, leisure remained a privilege of the higher classes. At the end of the nineteenth century, Thorstein Veblen’s Theory of the Leisure Class (1899/2007) proposed that “conspicuous consumption” and leisure, which was defined as nonproductive time, distinguished those with a higher income and education from the working classes. By the twentieth century, economic growth and technology were hoped to enable more leisure time for the wider population and, in the postwar period, production and consumption increased while working hours decreased. Advertising and credit cards also promoted greater consumption along with a sense of entitlement (Bell 1976; Robinson and Godbey 1997). However, as Staffan Linder (1970) claimed, more leisure time, greater affluence and consumption may actually have brought about a more “harried,” instead of relaxed lifestyle, as well as leading to a perceived paucity of time, since people felt a need to increase productivity, not only at work, but also during leisure. Juliet Schor (1993) pointed to an obsession with consumption, as leading to a rise in working hours, making Americans “overworked,” and thus more pressured. Yet the corollary of overall longer working hours has been refuted with the claim that studies rely on limited data and that they are not supported by time diary results (Jacobs and Gerson 2004; Roberts 2006; Robinson and Godbey 1997; Gershuny 2000). Indeed, time use studies that have compared the allocation of time over the years, have found that working time has actually

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decreased (Aguiar and Hurst 2006; Gershuny and Sullivan 2017). Nevertheless, today, as opposed to Veblen’s “leisure class,” those with a college education and more economically rewarding occupations, have been indicated as having less free time than the less educated and those in lower status jobs (Bellezza et al. 2017; Gershuny 2005; Katz et al. 2000; Offer and Schneider 2011; Roberts 2006, 2013; Robinson and Godbey 1997; Sullivan 2008; Gershuny and Sullivan 2017). Research concerning the relationship between work and leisure has focused, not only on working and leisure hours, but also on how they influence each other. Stanley Parker (1971) developed a typology of work-leisure relationships, defining three main patterns of leisure: the extension pattern, where work is central in life and leisure is an extension of work; the neutrality pattern, where leisure is independent of work; and the oppositional pattern, where work is seen as a necessity in order to obtain leisure. The first, he claimed, is most likely when people enjoy their work, the second, when work is seen as an economic necessity, rather than intrinsically rewarding, and the last occurs when work is disliked and leisure is experienced as the opposite. The work-leisure relationship is also central to Kenneth Roberts’ (2006) view of leisure as being significantly shaped by work. Though he also notes economic, political and social contexts in which leisure is defined, he points to the modern organization of work, as the, “first and foremost” of which leisure is a product (p. 2). He says people draw on the concepts of work and leisure to make sense of the way they use their time. However, past and recent literature has not limited the definition of leisure to its relationship with work. Time and leisure research has defined leisure as time free from the commitments of work, but also from household tasks or family duties (Dumazedier 1960; Parker 1976; Roberts 1978, 2006; Rojek 1999). Given my focus on freedom in this book, what is of particular significance here, is that we tend to regard free time as an unconstrained, flexible part of the day, which can be devoted to the self for relaxation, amusement, or self- development (Aguiar and Hurst 2006; Dumazedier 1960; Fava and Gist 1974). In addition, it is considered to be intrinsically motivated and rewarding, characterized by satisfaction and/or fulfillment, or thought to have other mental or physical benefits (Kando 1980; Roberts 2006; Stebbins 2012). If free time is linked to the self, examining the way we construe it and account for how we use it, may help us understand why we do what we do and what it says about who we are, or think we are and want to be.

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Studies exploring leisure have covered a wide range of topics including tourism, the consumption of culture, sport and other such activities (Cushman et al. 2005; Katz-Gerro and Shavit 1998; Rojek and Urry 1997; Roberts 2015; Aitchison et al. 2014). These studies associate “leisure” with planned recreation, structured hobbies, entertainment or holidays (Stebbins 2001). I shall prefer the use of the term “free time” rather than “leisure” as I wish to include, not only activities considered to be leisure, but also mundane, everyday practices, which may occupy a greater and less structured share of our daily, uncommitted time than those mentioned above. The use of the term “free time” is also better suited to the book’s focus on questions of freedom. In contrast to recreational activities, much of our day-to-day life can be classified as repetitive and regulated by time (Elias 1991; Giddens 1987; Melucci 1996; Zerubavel 1991). Habitualization relieves tension as it allows activities to be pursued with minimum decision-making (Berger and Luckman 1966). Just as much of our work, household chores or other duties are habitual, so too are many of our free time practices. Watching television, for instance, is a routinized practice in most households in many countries (ATUS 2018; Roberts 2006). Robert Stebbins (2001) differentiates between “serious leisure” which he defines as “profound” and “based on substantial skill, knowledge or experience”(p. 54) and “casual leisure” which is “short lived” and requires “little or no special training to enjoy it” (p. 53). He describes the former as being deeply satisfying, as opposed to the latter, which is unlikely to produce satisfaction and can become a habitual “way of life” (2001: 53). While Stebbins indicates these distinctions as a central reason why “serious leisure” warrants attention, in my view, this is precisely what makes the quotidian pastimes of “casual leisure” of equal interest to the social scientist. If, as he claims, casual leisure such as watching television, causes “a sense of ennui and listlessness rooted in the unsettling realization that one’s life is unfolding in a way largely, if not entirely, devoid of any significant excitement” (p. 54), why, then does the individual pursue such actions? This book focuses precisely on the subjective experience of everyday free time. This is not to say that it does not relate to “serious” leisure or planned recreation as well, yet it is not limited to these. Although it may be conceived as unimportant or banal, everyday free time may be significant in the pursuit of life goals or the construction of identities. The interaction between “trivial” actions of everyday life and the “existential

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drama” of striving for authenticity, self-esteem and meaning, plays an essential role in the self-construction of individuals (Hankiss 2006: 2). Moreover, since everyday life is repetitive and unconscious, exploring “ways of operating” may uncover “tactics” for creative resistance that ordinary people may use (de Certeau 1984: xiv). But to what extent are individuals able to resist? This brings me to the question of freedom. The word “free” may require further clarification. Free time may be free, as we have said, in the sense that it is time unoccupied by work or duties including both paid work and unpaid work such as domestic tasks or childcare (Roberts 1978; Robinson and Godbey 1997; Rojek 1999). Perhaps it is free too, from other daily necessities such as biological needs or school duties (Kando 1980; Katz et al. 2000; Neumeyer and Neumeyer 1958; Roberts 2006). But is it free in the sense of individual freedom? To what extent is it actually a realm of choice, as traditional definitions of leisure suggest (Brightbill 1960; Dumazedier 1960; Kelly 1983; Parker 1976)? The way we spend our time is also, undoubtedly shaped by external factors and constraints, both on the micro and macro levels. The amount and nature of free time activities among those in different classes, for example, may be influenced by elements outside the individual’s free choice (Kelly 1983; Stebbins 2007). Differences in the way people use their free time have been found between various socio-economic groups both within and between different countries (OECD 2009; Roberts 1989; Rojek 2010). One’s choices and actions may, in fact, be determined by a number of structural factors such as age, family and community, geographic location, gender, education, health, income or ethnic background (Drake 2013; Henderson and Hickerson 2007; Kelly 1983; Passias et al. 2017; Roberts 2006; Rojek 2010; Southerton 2006). Yet, an additional, if not entirely unrelated, influence on the actor’s agency are the cultural and discursive constructs, which are likely to shape, not only the way we use our time, but also how it is subjectively perceived by the individual (Kelly 1983; Rojek 1999). This latter influence is much more subtle, as well as much less explored, hence the need to fill this lacuna by exploring free time with an emphasis on trying to identify the impact of cultural scripts and constructs and how these are linked to agency. In his book, Decentering Leisure, Chris Rojek (1999) does attend to the link between sociocultural constructs and the way free time is used and perceived, yet it is not an empirical study. In a later book, The Labor of Leisure (2010), rather than accepting traditional notions of leisure

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as freedom, Rojek treats it as a form of labor. Following Rojek, I wish to focus on culture and freedom, yet empirically, as I draw on the findings of the current study to explore whether free time is really free or do people just “believe themselves to be free” (Rojek 2010)? I am concerned with the social structures and cultural influences that may shape one’s actions even as the individual may envisage him/herself as a free agent. As Anthony Elliott (2008: 5) suggests, even the act of going to a gym with the goal of achieving a desirable body shape, though it may be experienced as free choice, is undoubtedly influenced by cultural and commercial factors such as media images of ideal bodies or the selling of strategies to attain them. The fact that free time, unlike working time, is perceived as an autonomous arena where, as Rojek (2010: 1) puts it, “we are considered, and culturally represented, to exist in a state of voluntarism,” makes it all the more significant for the individual and worthy of attention to the social scientist. Consequently, the study of free time can serve as a valuable tool for the examination of cultural and structural influences on freedom and conceptions of the self. Because time has come to be thought of as a “precious commodity” (Robinson and Godbey 1997), time scarcity or “time famine” (Reeves and Szafran 1996) have been the focus of research that addresses pressure or role overload (Gershuny 2005; Hochschild 1997; Kaufman et al. 1991; Roberts 2006; Robinson and Godbey 1997; Schor 1993, 1998; Wajcman 2014). The “acceleration” or “speedup of life” (Robinson and Godbey 1997; Rosa 2013; Sharma 2014; Wajcman 2014; Wajcman and Dodd 2016) in contemporary society has led to a sense of “busyness” (Gershuny 2005; Putnam 2000) “time squeeze” and “harriedness” (Linder 1970; Schor 1993; Southerton 2003; Southerton and Tomlinson 2005). Hence, a large body of research focuses on the pressures of work and family, multitasking, and the division of labor and gender inequality (Bittman and Wajcman 2000; Braun et al. 2008; Daly 2001; Gillis 2001; Gerson 2010; Hochschild 1997; Hochschild and Machung 1990; Ochs and Kremer-Sadlik 2013; Offer and Schneider 2008, 2011; Reeves and Szafran 1996). Although these issues certainly merit attention, the focus of the current book is on nonworking time. While I do not doubt that work may play a major role in the construction of identities (Angouri and Marra 2011; Dutton et al. 2010; Gini 1998; Hall and Du Gay 1996; Knights and Willmott 1999) and that it fills a large proportion of one’s daily life, it is precisely for these reasons that free time may be perceived as particularly valuable.

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Much of the literature has implied an “overworked” self, both within demanding organizations (Schor 1993), as well as among contractors or freelancers, who, despite believing they have more control over their time, still work long hours, leaving little time to be used as desired (Evans et al. 2004). As I have said earlier, other research, however, suggests that working hours have decreased and we now have more free time than our parents’ generation ever had, yet people still seem to feel busy and time-pressured (Aguiar and Hurst 2006; ATUS 2018; Gershuny 2005; Roberts 2006; Robinson and Godbey 1997; Rosa 2003; Wajcman 2014), a paradox that I seek to better understand by exploring the subjective experience of free time. I am not the first to attempt to account for this paradox, yet my focus is on free time and the self, as I highlight questions of meaning. Time budget research and studies using national surveys based on the time diary method, have been useful in ascertaining the amount of time spent working and taking care of the family, as well as determining how much free time people have and the way they use it (ATUS 2018; Cushman et al. 2005; Katz et al. 2000; OECD 2009; Robinson and Godbey 1997). Such research allows the assessment of similarities and differences in time use among various groups according to age, gender, class and race (Bianchi and Robinson 1997; Cushman et al. 2005; Katz et al. 2000; Robinson and Godbey 1997; Shinew et al. 2004). Yet time use studies are more concerned with what and how much, rather than subjective meanings. As we have seen, abundant literature has focused on work-leisure relationships, time pressure, gender and time, or on recreational activities such as sport, tourism or cultural consumption, yet the link between time use, freedom and the construction of self has been somewhat neglected. In an attempt to fill this gap, this book focuses on the subjective meanings of “free time,” and the way these are related to freedom and the self.

Individualism and the Contemporary Self Since one of the major concerns of the book is the self and the construction of individual identities, I now examine certain assumptions regarding notions of the self in Western culture as they appear in the literature. Firstly, the discourse of individualism is central to the way we think about the self. I thus begin by briefly outlining the development of this discourse and the way in which it has shaped conceptions of the self.

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As early as the eighteenth century, the foundations of the modern version of individual freedom were laid by Rousseau (1754/1992) who considered free will to be a quality distinguishing man from animals and enabling him to act freely. His work inspired leaders of the French Revolution, with individual freedom being the guiding principle of the first two parts of the revolution’s tripartite motto: liberty, equality and fraternity. Tracing the historical development of individualism, Steven Lukes (1971) points out that the German, Romantic idea of individualism, was associated with individuality and self-realization. Calling it the “individualism of uniqueness,” Georg Simmel (1971: 224) suggested that this new form of individualism that emerged in the nineteenth century, replaced the idea of equality, though freedom, he says, was still the “common denominator” (p. 222). It was not simply being free from the shackles of various institutions that mattered, “but that one was a particular and irreplaceable individual” (p. 222). However, it was in America, suggests Lukes (1971), that individualism came to celebrate capitalism and democracy. Indeed, Benjamin Franklin’s (1997) notion of the self-made man was based on the idea that every ­individual, through hard work, is able to achieve success and prosperity. Yet, French political philosopher, Alexis de Tocqueville after having visited America, also pointed to what he considered to be the negative potential of individualism. In his book, Democracy in America (1969), he suggests that equality tends to isolate individuals “to concentrate every man’s attention upon himself” (p. 505) and that, “Individualism … disposes each member of the community to sever himself from the mass of his fellow-creatures; and to draw apart with his family and his friends” (p. 574). An additional observation that he makes, is the “restless spirit” of Americans, who, despite their freedom, education and prosperity, seemed to him as “if a cloud habitually hung upon their brow.” This, he explains, is due to the fact that they are “always in a hurry” in the “pursuit of worldly welfare” and “fresh gratifications”(pp. 605–606). Such questions concerning isolation, time pressure, and the pursuit of gratification, seem as relevant today as they did then. Yet, the term individualism acquired more positive meanings as it came to be associated with individual will and self-reliance (Emerson 1841/1974). Since then, fulfillment, the “pursuit of individual autonomy,” and “the quest for the self” (Bellah 1985) have become, not only a liberal right, but also an imperative (Bauman 2005; Cronin 2000). This may be particularly true among the middle and upper classes,1

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whose worldview has been shown to be shaped by individualistic values, which promote self-development and the use of free time to optimize it (Birenbaum-Carmeli 2001; Lareau 2002). Selfhood is experienced as a “matter of personal choice, design or project, as a defining aspect of inner desires and dreams” (Elliot 2008: 4). This notion of selfhood shapes conceptions of free time as an arena of choice where one can, not only choose and control one’s actions, but also satisfy one’s desires, be these for pleasure or self-fulfillment. Giddens (1991) suggests that we are now increasingly considered to be what we make of ourselves, and the individual is perceived as a knowledgeable agent, capable of “mastery,” “decisions,” “self-realization,” “self actualization” and “control,” all of which are essential to the “reflexive project of the self.” So, while the idea of the self-project is not new, it has not been explored in the context of free time. The way we use our time may be, to a large extent, an expression of the self- project and reflexivity, which, as Giddens says, is a means of dealing with the uncertainties of “late modernity” (Giddens 1991). Indeed isolation, multiple roles and feelings of uncertainty may have increased in a time when tradition, communality and religion have decreased, leaving the individual with no definite truths around which to construct identity. “The self has become a problem” (Baumeister 1987: 163) and this problematic nature of selfhood is at the heart of therapeutic industries, which make the individual forever aware that the “empty self” needs to be filled (Cushman 1990; Lears 1983). McGee (2005) suggests that the “endlessly belabored self” is “overworked both as the subject and as the object of its own efforts at self- improvement” (p. 16). A sense of inadequacy and uncertainty may generate a constant need to fill “the empty self” just as we are expected to fill our empty time. Yet, the culture of individualism in which we are so deeply immersed, also envisages the individual as a free, autonomous agent. Perhaps, as Nikolas Rose (1998) claims, today freedom is “an ideal that imposes as many burdens, anxieties and divisions, as it inspires projects of emancipation” (p. 197). In contrast, free time may be understood as the ultimate expression of freedom, when one is free from burdens and anxieties and free to let go. It may thus be perceived as insignificant in more serious matters pertaining to life goals or the construction of identities. However, free time is likely to play a pivotal role in self-work, envisaged as closely linked to individualization. As Zygmunt Bauman aptly puts it in the foreword of Beck and Beck Gernsheim’s book on

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Individualization (2002), “in the land of individual freedom of choice, the option to escape individualization and to refuse participation in the individualizing game is emphatically not on the agenda…” (p. xvi). The pressures of individualization may, not only hinder freedom, but magnify the resulting sense of inadequacy, making it all the more disturbing due to the “empowerment that freedom was expected to deliver” (p. xvii). So how free is “free” time? To what extent does the self- project2 mean conforming to social and cultural ideals that define what is a desirable self and prescribe how to use time? What is meant by the widely expressed wish that we so often hear, “I want more time for myself”? Does this mean time for enjoyment and relaxation or time to devote to the self-project? These are some of the questions that will be explored in the book.

Time, Consumption and the Self We cannot examine the relationship between free time, the self and freedom without addressing the importance of consumer capitalism as both an economic and macro-cultural context. The very essence of consumer culture is the creation of want, so that it becomes difficult for the individual to distinguish between necessities and the temptation to consume for the sake of consumption (Bauman 1998) making it a common pastime in everyday life. Driven by market forces, consumption has become an integral part of what we call free time, whether spent shopping in a mall, dining in a restaurant or getting a massage. Leisure has become commercialized, with most free time practices depending on the consumption of goods and services (Butsch 1969/1990). The seduction of the consumer, promoted by the marketing system (Bell 1976), encourages consumption, not only as a way to pass the time, but also as a means to identity construction. In this way, one’s time, even that which is considered “free,” may be structured by the institutions of capitalism, as is one’s very identity. While modern capitalism promotes acquisition as an “ultimate purpose” in life (Weber 1930/1992: 18), the consumption of goods and services is also perceived as having the magical power to transform the individual (Campbell 1987; Illouz 2002; Jhally 1989) and change one’s physical, psychic and social well-being (Lears 1983). Consumption is offered as a solution, with happiness as the outcome (Kellner 1995: 337). Even authenticity and self-expression have become commodified

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(Rojek 1999: 4). Consumption, in sum, has become a sine qua non for selfhood. Identity is a product sold everywhere “as a means for personal happiness and freedom” (Elliott 2008: 4) thus consumption, like free time, is associated with concepts of freedom and choice. Despite the positive connotations of freedom, individual choice in consumption has been found to have negative implications. Hyperchoice can be unsatisfying and psychologically draining (Mick et al. 2004; Schwartz 2004). The endless choice of goods and services is intertwined with the choice of identities as the individual associates certain products with various kinds of selves. Moreover, a rich pool of cultural scripts conveyed via advertisements and self-help literature, fosters anxiety through images of insufficiency (McGee 2005: 16, 18). In the absence of family and communal support, consumers may well end up devoting their free time to the consumption of services provided by personal trainers, coaches and therapists, in order to better manage their lives (Hochschild 2012). In more than one way, consumption has become intricately related to a process of constant work on the self (Elliott and Urry 2010). This is not to say that free time and consumption are devoted solely to the self-project. Campbell (1987) suggests that modern consumerism is motivated by a desire for the experience of pleasure, which products offer to realize. However, the tension between illusion and reality “creates longing as a permanent mode, with the concomitant sense of dissatisfaction with ‘what is’ and a yearning for ‘something better’” (Campbell 1987: 90). This book therefore wishes to explore the extent to which free time is perceived as a realm of choice where one is able to pursue pleasure, happiness and imagined selves, addressing the question of whether the consumption of goods and services is conceived as one of the means for doing so. Chapter 7 focuses on the meaning of consumption for the individual and how it is incorporated into one’s daily use of free time.

Time, Media Technology and the Self There is no doubt that the advancement of technology has become fundamental to day-to-day life in general and consumption in particular, giving rise to significant changes in the way we use our time. Besides the time saved by the use of modern appliances, the consumption of advanced technology has come to constitute an integral part of our

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being. Much of our free time is occupied by the use of media, including television, the Internet and mobile phones. Although television viewing has decreased in recent years, it continues to be the most popular and time-consuming of free time practices in modern countries (ATUS 2018; Statista 2016) including Israel, where the average viewing time is three and a half hours per day (Mann and Lev-On 2017). The use of Internet has risen dramatically in Israel and worldwide (Bezeq 2014; IWS 2018; Kemp 2017), being accessible on home computers, laptops and mobile phones. In 2017, there were 3.77 billion Internet users worldwide, a 10% rise from 2015, and the number of global mobile users was almost 5 billion (Kemp 2017). This means that we are so deeply immersed in media technology that our free time seems to be dominated by it. If we are not watching television, we are using the Internet on our computers or our mobile phones, or doing all three activities simultaneously. When popular access to the Internet was relatively new, Cooper (1998) suggested that the “Triple A” key factors that explain its power include Access, Affordability and Anonymity. Indeed, these factors are still applicable to the full spectrum of media technology. Moreover, since technology allows mobile use, it follows us wherever we are. In their book, Mobile Lives, Elliott and Urry (2010) focus on the link between increasing mobility and the self. Smartphones, they say, shape identities allowing a “portable personhood” (p. 3). While they recognize the positive effects of these devices, they point out how preoccupied people have become with their use, having a negative draining effect on the self. Sherry Turkle (2012) also emphasizes the effect of mobile phones on the self, saying that they have become “so powerful that they change not only what we do, but also who we are.” But besides implications for selfhood, technology has been indicated as the culprit for the disintegration of social ties. In her book, Alone Together, Turkle (2011) focuses on why our high expectations of technology make us expect less from each other and how certain practices, such as texting and the use of Facebook or e-mail, offer illusions of friendship, changing social interaction and increasing loneliness. Even before the dominance of mobile phones, Robert Putnam’s (1995, 2000) groundbreaking book, Bowling Alone, claimed that technology isolates individuals as it privatizes and individualizes our use of leisure time, and home-centered entertainment. On the other hand, the use of the Internet has also been indicated as increasing connections and enhancing the social lives of users (Amichai-Hamburger and Hayat 2011; Hua and Wellman 2010;

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Wellman 2004) and there are now 2.8 billion social media users worldwide (Kemp 2017). Nonetheless, the major point here is that media practices are instrumental in the construction of identities, playing a crucial part in self-presentation and impression management (McKenna and Seidman 2005; Turkle 1995; Zhao et al. 2008) as well as shaping social connections and the way we use our time. The significance of media technology for present purposes goes beyond the above-mentioned considerations and may be explained on a number of levels. Firstly, the media serve as a source of information that presents models of the ideal self, defines notions of happiness and success and prescribes what is worthy and what is not. Elliot (2008: 4) suggests that, “Selfhood is advertised, televised and talked about as the principal means for joining and enjoying the modern world…” As Melucci (1996) points out in his book, The Playing Self, our reality is constructed by information, particularly the kind that is made up of images. He suggests that “To feed ourselves we consume symbols, to love and reproduce, we resort to the advice of experts, to desire and dream we use the language provided by the media” (p. 1). The problem, he says, is that since we are exposed to so many symbolic possibilities, we become frustrated by the gap between the imagined world and reality and “identity must therefore be forever reestablished and renegotiated” (p. 145). Prescriptions of self-fulfillment in the mass media may thus generate dissatisfaction and encourage work on the self (Rose 1998: 17). Secondly, sources of information and images presented in the media not only provide prescriptions for the ideal self and happiness, but, as I have said above, they also serve consumer culture by encouraging the consumption of both goods and services. This includes further consumption of various modes of media, which, in turn, reinforce models of the “perfect self” that promote self-work requiring the consumption of goods and services that are perceived as necessary for the designing of the self. Thus, this circular process may perpetuate particular conceptions of self, as well as guiding the way we use our time in order to pursue these ideals. Moreover, since the use of media encourages further media consumption, the extent of our exposure to cultural scripts becomes greater the more we use it. Another significant effect of technology is its contribution to the speed up of life (Davis 2013; Robinson and Godbey 1997; Rosa 2013; Wajcman 2014; Wajcman and Dodd 2016). This does not only mean, as mentioned earlier, that modern technology saves time, but that we

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have come to be blindly reliant on various devices that are conceived as tools for efficiency (Robinson and Godbey 1997: 45). Indeed, multitasking and time management (Kaufman et al. 1991; Robinson and Godbey 1997; Turkle 1995, 2011) are enabled and encouraged by technology whether in the form of phone applications or mobile Internet, so that we find ourselves talking on the phone while performing other tasks such as driving, shopping, taking care of our children or dining with friends, or we check our e-mails, Whatsapp and Facebook as we wait in line or picnic in nature. Why do we feel we must busy ourselves on these devices? Does technology grant us more free time or does it rather set higher and multiple expectations, thereby exacerbating time pressure? And in what way is our time culturally constructed by discourses that promote productivity and the utilization of time? The following addresses these questions by looking at various discourses that color the way we think about time, happiness and freedom.

Time, Happiness and Freedom I begin by looking at how capitalism and the precept, “time is money,” has shaped our conceptions of time. When attempting to formulate a conceptual definition of the spirit of capitalism, Max Weber (1930/1992: 14) turns to Benjamin Franklin’s “Advice to a Young Tradesman.” The letter was intended primarily as business advice, thus it includes time management tips for productive time use. Franklin’s words “time is money” and his ensuing advice, link the efficient utilization of time with desirable outcomes, namely success in business and wealth. Idleness is considered, not only a waste of time but also costly since it is time that could be put to better use in order to increase one’s capital, which, says Weber, is assumed to be an end in itself. The moral attitudes that Franklin preaches are not merely good business sense, but an ethos (p. 17). “The summum bonum” of the ethic of modern Western capitalism, Weber states, is the “earning of more and more money, combined with the strict avoidance of all spontaneous enjoyment of life” (p. 18). This brand of capitalism shaped by the Protestant work ethic, calls for self-discipline, a quality necessary for industry, punctuality and prudence, some of the “virtues” advocated by Franklin. Although consumer culture is an integral part of contemporary capitalism, self-discipline is not what one would associate with consumerism. On the contrary, rather than promoting self-control and frugality,

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consumer culture encourages impulsivity and spending, and instead of avoiding hedonic pleasure, it cultivates it. Tracing the historical development of The Cultural Contradictions of Capitalism, Daniel Bell (1976) points to the contrast between capitalist principles of efficiency, rationality and self-control as opposed to a hedonistic concern with “play, fun, display and pleasure” (p. 70). So, on the one hand, we feel we must exercise self-discipline and manage our time efficiently. On the other hand, unlike Weber’s idea of capitalism, we are also encouraged to pursue, rather than avoid “spontaneous enjoyment of life.” My question here is how these discursive contradictions affect the way we spend and think about our free time. Influenced by the spirit of capitalism and the Protestant work ethic, our conceptions of time color the way we understand and experience free time. Like money, free time is considered to be valuable and can be used in different ways, saved or wasted (Katz et al. 2000: 23). Busyness is perceived as worthy, while inactivity, or simply passing the time is considered unproductive and negative (Gershuny 2005; Sullivan 2008). Thus wanting to “escape boredom” is conceived as “natural” (Russell 1996: 51) and ennui, as a “sin for which there is no forgiveness” (Wilde 1994: 233). Besides revealing a decisively pejorative attitude to boredom, these words convey the idea of individual responsibility as a moral obligation, reflecting what Rojek (2010) calls the discourse of neoliberal individualism and extending it to the realm of time. The notion of personal responsibility is closely linked to principles of individual rights and conceptions of happiness. If “the pursuit of Happiness” is an “unalienable Right” as stated in the American Declaration of Independence, then a failure to make use of this right may consequently be perceived as blameworthy. Happiness is considered one’s own personal responsibility and an ethical duty (Ahmed 2010; Rose 1998). The democratic principle of entitlement is fundamental to the American dream, which allows happiness and success for all who make an effort, and “agency is all that matters” (Hochschild 1995: 252). Happiness has become a prime goal to be pursued by the individual. Free time may be conceived as an opportunity to achieve happiness, particularly as it is associated with freedom and autonomy. The concept of happiness is linked to two traditions. The first, proposed by Bentham (1789/1978), and later Mill (1861/2012), relates to a hedonistic notion of happiness based on a utilitarianist approach that focuses on the attainment of pleasure and the avoidance of pain. The second,

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the eudaimonic approach, originates in the work of Aristotle (350 BCE/2009), which proposed that happiness, linked to virtue, is the ultimate goal in human life. Well-being research embraces the eudaimonic approach, emphasizing meaning and self-realization (Ryan and Deci 2001; Ryff and Singer 2008; Waterman 1993). The desire for hedonic happiness and the need for a meaningful life, have been indicated as the two most commonly held goals used by people to evaluate and motivate themselves (Baumeister et al. 2013). A central concern of this book is the conception of free time as possibly reflecting and being motivated by both. The approaches of positive psychology, as well as humanistic and social psychology, have contributed to research on happiness and meaningfulness, stressing characteristics and fundamental human needs that motivate individuals (Argyle 2013; Csikszentmihalyi 1990; Frankl 2006; Kahneman et al. 1999; Seligman 2002; Seligman and Csikszentmihalyi 2000; Maslow 1943, 1968). Social psychologists have indicated basic needs including autonomy, personal growth, self-actualization and self-efficacy as well as love and belonging, positive relations and values, as fundamental to well-being and finding meaning in life (Baumeister 1991; Maslow 1943; Ryff and Singer 2008). The psychological approach to happiness, meaning and well-being, is the basis of the therapeutic ethos whose language and methods pervade social and cultural life and shape ideas of modern identity (Furedi 2004; Illouz 1991, 2008; Wright: 2011). Eva Illouz (1991: 240–241) defines the therapeutic ethos as a theory of self-knowledge functioning on two levels. The first is prescriptive, relying and using scientific discourses, whereas the second is explanatory, providing a framework to explain successes and failures. A large body of literature has linked the rise of the therapeutic with negative implications. It has been claimed that the therapeutic perspective sets the “boundaries of moral life” (Nolan 1998: 2) and that psychology has replaced religion and morality (Rieff 1966). The therapeutic ethos has also been linked to a “culture of narcissism” (Lasch 1991), to an “empty self” (Cushman 1990), emotionalism and a sense of powerlessness (Furedi 2004). Foucault (1978, 1979), as does Rose (1998), emphasizes the role of therapeutic discourse as a means of social control as it promotes self-surveillance in systems of power. The idea of responsibility for one’s destiny is reinforced by the therapeutic ethos in keeping with the Protestant ethic (Illouz 1991: 242) and the capitalist value of industriousness, which promotes self-work designed to achieve results (McGee 2005; Rose 1998). This therapeutic

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approach to self- improvement is also rooted in an individualistic ­conception of the future as “an open space to be realized by individuals” (Yian 2004: 175). In this way, the therapeutic ethos is linked to time as individuals strive toward imagined selves for which they assume responsibility. People divide themselves into a real and potential self, says Arlie Hochschild (1997), the latter being who they would be if only they “had time” (p. 221). In other words, time is conceived as a valuable resource to be utilized for self-work. One of the central goals for the self is individuality, which as Bauman (2005) points out, is envisaged as one’s “right and duty” (p. 19). Yet, he says that in a society where “everyone must be individual,” people are “anything but individual, different or unique. They are, on the contrary strikingly like each other.” (p. 16). Thus, though free time may be conceived as a site for authenticity and autonomy, the way we use our time may, in fact, be subject to the contradictory principles of consumer capitalism that encourage individualism on the one hand and conformity on the other (Illouz 2002: 96). With the goal of achieving happiness, autonomy and self-fulfillment, we constantly inspect ourselves (Rose 1998) and this self-surveillance brings about conformity to knowledge as defined by discourses of sexuality, biomedicine and therapy (Illouz 2008; Lears 1983; Rieff 1966), which direct, not only how we think about ourselves but also how we act in everyday life. Society, suggests Elliott (2008: 5), “might be said to discipline and regulate the self, so that our deepest feelings about ourselves, as well as our beliefs about our identities, are shaped to their roots by broader social forces.” This raises questions about freedom. If the way we think about ourselves is, indeed, shaped by such “forces,” to what extent is the individual free? In his seminal essay on the meaning of freedom for modern man, Fromm (1942/1984) distinguishes between negative freedom and positive freedom, the first being freedom from constraints, and the second, freedom to realize the individual self. His claim is that, while having been freed from the bonds of pre-individualistic society, modern man has not gained freedom in the positive sense. One of the mechanisms of escape from a feeling of powerlessness, Fromm argues, is that the individual conforms to cultural patterns so that he “ceases to be himself” (p. 159). This, he says, contradicts the assumption that individuals “are free to think, feel, act as they please.” Nevertheless, individuals believe that their thoughts and feelings are their own, a belief Fromm calls “an illusion” (p. 160). Berlin (1958/1969), too, distinguishes between

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negative and positive freedom, suggesting that the first means being free from the deliberate coercion of other human beings while the second relates to the individual’s wish “to be his own master.” (p. 8) This means being free from external constraints, but also internal constraints that can only be removed “by being analyzed and understood” (p. 15). Since free time is thought to be a realm of freedom, questions of freedom are all the more pertinent to the concerns of this book. To what extent are one’s actions, in the context of free time, indeed a matter of free choice? Durkheim’s work (1884/2014, 1895/1982, 1912/2008), particularly on morality, raised questions about free choice. Parsons (1949) considered Durkheim’s theory to be voluntaristic, stressing the link between the actor’s motives and action. This interpretation of Durkheim was criticized by both Pope (1973) and Cohen (1975). Pope rejects Parsons’ idea of internalization of values as being associated with free choice, suggesting that, on the contrary, Durkheim’s view of values and norms is linked to social control. He writes, “Durkheim feels that the greater the internalization of the social component, the greater the control it exercises over the individual and the less his freedom of choice” (p. 406). Similarly, Cohen suggests that Durkheim’s actor does not choose moral rules, but rather obeys social regulations. Yet, while for Durkheim, social control was primarily seen as serving society and having benefits for the individual, Foucault (1979) focuses on power in terms of domination and control,3 as the individual is disciplined by a “gaze,” which induces “a state of conscious and permanent visibility” (p. 201). This raises questions that are addressed in the book. How does this “gaze” shape our conceptions of time, happiness, freedom and selfhood? In what way does constant self-surveillance, as a consequence of that “gaze,” cultivate a sense of insecurity and inadequacy as one becomes preoccupied with attaining a worthy identity in keeping with dominant discourses? Perhaps the myth of self-mastery and autonomy masks the disciplinary nature of discursive definitions of truth, so that our actions are perceived as a manifestation of free choice and agency rather than an unconscious attempt to pursue desirable identities made salient in contemporary discourses.

Culture, Freedom and the Question of Agency Guided by a cultural interpretive perspective, I treat the analysis of culture as “an interpretive one in search of meaning” (Geertz 1973: 5) My emphasis on meaning follows a Weberian approach which takes into

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account subjective and shared meanings, motives, emotions, ideas and values in social interaction. Extending a similar approach to the issue of time, culture is addressed here as presumably playing a major role—still largely unexamined—in shaping, not only what people do in their time, but also how they subjectively evaluate their time use and express the meanings attached to it. I thus draw on cultural sociology since it stresses processes of meaning-making, why meanings vary, and how they shape social life, as well as focusing on the cultural resources from which individuals construct strategies of action (Spillman 2002: 9). Moreover, cultural sociologists have underscored the formation of identities within culture, even national cultural traditions, since culture sets standards of what the individual should strive to be, and defines who is a worthy person and what behaviors are reasonable (Lamont 1992). In this way, culture shapes conceptions of the self, directs self-management and guides action. Illouz (2003) suggests that culture is not simply “a mirror of or commentary on the world but an ongoing cultural resource for the self to manage itself …” (p. 15). For Hays (1994) culture is seen as social structure consisting of two central elements: systems of relations, such as class and gender; and systems of meaning, including beliefs and values, forms of knowledge and practices. She says, the second, often referred to as culture, “influences not only what we think about, but how we think about it” (p. 68). Focusing on the relation between culture and action, Swidler (1986, 2001) suggests that lines of action are constructed in various ways, selected by actors from a “tool kit” or repertoire, which contains stories, symbols, rituals and worldviews, used as building blocks in developing strategies of action. She points out that, “People draw on multiple, often competing cultural traditions, and they easily find ways to justify quite varied actions” (2001: 107). Other scholars (Alexander 2003; Hays 1994) consider social structures and culture, itself a form of structure, to be “both constraining and enabling” (p. 65). Alexander (2003) emphasizes the part played by, what he labels “cultural structures,” yet the “strong program” he advocates presents people as being “dictated more by unconscious than conscious reason” (p. 3). The goal of cultural sociology, says Alexander, is to “bring the social unconscious up for view.” The question, then, is to what extent does culture determine perceptions, actions and self-identities or are individuals indeed able to choose “strategies of action” from cultural repertoires (Bourdieu 1984; Giddens 1991; Ortner 1990; Schudson 1989)? Pursuing a middle position,

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Schudson (1989) as does Ortner (1990), takes neither a purely voluntaristic view, which regards cultural objects as a “toolkit” available for use, nor a view of culture as imposing or dictating human action. Rather, he sees culture as the “unspoken backdrop to our thoughts, acts and messages,” making us “mindful” of some things more than others (Schudson 1989: 155). Culture is also used in the process of evaluation as individuals attempt to define legitimate behavior in their day-to-day lives. As a repertoire of possible and diverse justifications, it helps individuals make sense of their actions (Boltanski and Thevenot 1999; Swidler 2001). The book hopes to shed light on cultural repertoires that are linked to free time practices and conceptions of self while also addressing issues of subjective meaning and agency. Thus I now look into the concept of agency that has been conceptualized in various ways within different frameworks. The question of agency takes into account social structure and culture, but, as discussed briefly above, also addresses the extent to which these constrain or enable choice and free action. The notion of agency as freedom is rooted in individualistic discourses associating it with free will, autonomy, entitlement and self-realization. Cinderella stories, such as those presented by Oprah Winfrey, portray therapeutic biographies (Illouz 2003) of heroes and heroines depicted as active agents who, rather than being constrained by their social worlds, manage to conquer difficulties despite unfavorable external forces. Television and self-help books promote conceptions of a self, motivated toward “re-invention, reconstruction, restaging and reshaping” (Bauman 2000). This individualistic notion of agency ignores the impact of social structures and culture. Hays (1994) discusses the issue of agency versus culture using the word “choice” to denote agency. Yet, agency, in her view is not a matter of free will, but rather the ability to choose from various courses of action. She says, “alternative courses of action are available and the agent therefore could have acted otherwise.” (p. 64). The question is precisely whether one can always choose “alternative courses of action” and whether the individual is able to challenge dominant discourses and act “otherwise”? If discourses, such as individualism, are accepted as true and unquestionable, to what extent does the individual indeed have free choice? Foucault (1980) claims that every society has its regime of truth, defining what is accepted as true. His work on disciplinary power (1978, 1979) is described by Leslie Miller (2008: 255) as a “top-down,

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totalizing and deterministic model of the relationship between discourse and the actor.” In the frame of social constructionism, “Foucauldian Constructivism,” as she calls it, purports that the subject is entirely constructed by discourse, implying no agency at all. Yet, differentiating between Foucault’s early and later work, Miller relates to Foucault’s later claim that without the possibility of resistance there would be no relations of power (Foucault 1988). Foucault’s shift in his approach to freedom in his final years is evident in the title: “The Ethic of Care for the Self as a Practice of Freedom” (1987), an interview where he states that the “subject constitutes himself in an active fashion” (p. 122). Presenting a post-structuralist approach, Bronwyn Davies (1999: 60, 61) describes choices as “forced choices” since subjects are constituted through multiple discourses to “want” a particular line of action. She suggests that we discursively produce ourselves without being aware, taking on “the discursive practices and storylines as if they were our own…” (p. 103). It is awareness, in her view, that allows agency. She writes, Agency is never freedom from discursive constitution of self but the capacity to recognize that constitution and to resist, subvert, and change the discourses themselves through which one is being constituted. (p. 67)

This approach, while suggesting “forced choices,” does leave room for action in the form of resistance. I now turn to conceptions of agency that view the individual, not as a subject that is discursively constructed, but rather as a more active agent, such as those proposed by Hays (1994), Ortner (1990) or Schudson (1989), as we have seen earlier. Repertoire theory implies an actor able to choose from a range of options, yet it recognizes that choice is not unlimited. Pragmatic sociology, as a form of repertoire theory, sees actors as having the capacity for evaluation and criticism; however this does not suggest that they are free agents, since the pool of regimes of criticism and justification from which they can choose, is in fact, limited (Silber 2003: 430). Swidler (2001: 86) points out that it is easier for people to “construct strategies for which they already have the cultural equipment.” This raises the question of whether individuals are indeed able to acquire alternative cultural equipment, as Swidler (1986) implied in earlier statements regarding her “toolkit” theory; or are their choices

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perhaps more constrained than toolkit theory seems to suggest? As Fine (1992: 94) puts it, “Even when individuals have the opportunity to make choices, in fact their ‘realistic’ repertoire as cultural actors is a much smaller proportion of the total number of imaginable actions.” Is it possible that the “imaginable actions” themselves are limited by discourse which constructs the very way we think about options of action? Perhaps, then, alternative paths cannot even be imagined. Rather than conceptualizing agency as action, Emirbayer and Mische (1998) focus on deliberation and “temporal- relational contexts of action.” Drawing on pragmatism and phenomenology, they define agency as, …the temporally constructed engagement by actors of different structural environments—the temporal-relational contexts of action—which, through the interplay of habit, imagination, and judgment, both reproduces and transforms those structures in interactive response to the problems posed by changing historical situations. (p. 970)

Agency, then, can be understood in temporal contexts, in terms of action, thought, conceptions of self, worldviews or resistance. In the book, I shall use the word freedom to denote agency, since it encompasses the idea of free will and choice as well as free action. My intention is to assess the above notions of agency through the empirical examination of free time. In other words, I explore what sort of agency is associated with notions and practices of free time, in the hope of also shedding light on the enabling and constraining parameters of cultural repertoires, in the specific context at hand.

The Study When I embarked on the study, besides being interested in what people did in their free time, I wished to understand how they felt about that time. Given my focus on questions of freedom and the self, I looked for ways to uncover meaning attached to free time. I thus chose to use two main methods: questionnaires and semi-structured in-depth interviews (for more details see Appendix A). The first was designed to attain quantitative data about participants and their free time, including, the types, duration and frequency of various activities, but also with whom certain

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activities were shared. The second tool, the oral interview, focused on subjective meanings related to the participants’ experience, motivation and evaluation of free time as well as questions related to freedom and happiness. In addition, I participated in local activities, interviewed key figures in the town and examined textual data, such as a local magazine. This was hoped to give a sense of the town, its residents and their lifestyle. When I met with participants, I first gave them the written questionnaire, which was completed in my presence in order to allow for the clarification of any questions. Indeed, most participants commented or asked questions during its completion, which sharpens the need for an additional tool, particularly one that allows more profound interaction between interviewer and participant. I use the term participant rather than interviewee or subject, in order to reflect the active role of the participant. The semi-structured, in-depth interview followed the questionnaire. At the beginning of the oral stage of the interview, the participant was encouraged to answer freely and in as much detail as possible. This, and the open nature of the questions, promoted reflexivity and openness, evident in the way participants reacted. For example, at the end of the interview, one participant commented she had not realized how little time she had for herself. Two others reported feeling as though they had just been to a psychologist, while others simply described the process as thought provoking. The participants were married men and women aged between 32 and 63, residents of a relatively affluent suburban town in central Israel (for more details about the sample, see Appendix A). The central location of the town and its upper-middle class status, meant that the participants had access to a wide range of leisure options. The town has a cinema and a shopping center, community, sports and cultural centers, as well as being located near major cities with malls, restaurants, beaches, cultural centers, and other leisure sites. Moreover, since the participants were middle aged with older children, their free time was less likely to be limited by the demands of small children.

The Israeli Middle Class Context I now turn to the structural and cultural context of the study. Firstly, we must take into account the upper-middle class status of the town, and secondly, the Israeli context of the study.

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As mentioned earlier, structural elements, such as socio-economic factors, geographic location, education and markets may determine availability of certain activities and the provision of services. Class is likely to influence free time options, allowing a wider choice among higher classes than among lower socio-economic groups. On the other hand, class may limit the amount of free time available to the participants of the study, since higher income workers have been found to work longer hours due to more demanding professions (Bellezza et al. 2017; Robinson and Godbey 1997; Gershuny 2005; Katz et al. 2000; Offer and Schneider 2011). The political structure in the Israeli context must also be considered. The fact that Israel is a democratic ­society promoting individual rights, is likely to affect free time practices and the way they are perceived, as well as conceptions of selfhood. Moreover, the security threats of day-to-day life in a country beset with war and terrorist attacks, may contribute to the conceived value of free time, possibly influencing the nature and evaluation of free time activities. Besides these structural considerations, we must also take into account the cultural impact of contradictory discourses in Israeli society. As discussed earlier, individualism is central to contemporary conceptions of selfhood. Nevertheless, as Markus and Kitayama (1991) suggest, construals of the self may vary among different cultures. They propose that American culture emphasizes independence and personal attributes, whereas many Non-Western cultures foster harmonious interdependence. In addition, predictors of life satisfaction have been found to differ between individualist and collectivist nations, with the former emphasizing satisfaction as being linked to the self and freedom (Oishi et al. 1999). Western cultures have also been associated with a greater emphasis on hedonism as opposed to collectivist cultures that are more duty oriented (Triandis 1995). Having said that, and while these issues must be considered, this dichotomy is not applicable here, since Israel embodies Western values of individualism on the one hand, and traditional, collective v­alues of Jewish culture, such as family (Lavee and Katz 2003; Oyserman 1993; Remennick 2000), as well as a strong Zionist legacy of nationalcollectivist orientations on the other (Almog 2000; Feldman 2008; Liebman and Don-Yehiya 1983: Zerubavel 1995). However, while family, collectivity and tradition are highly valued in Israel (Katz et al. 1997), in many ways, Israeli culture has increasingly adopted the

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individualistic values of liberalism and the lifestyle of consumer ­capitalism since the 1970s, with the introduction of television and the move to liberal economic policies and the growing privatization of services. The “Americanization of Israel” has been indicated as central in this process, with America being considered a model of the “good life,” which is associated with abundance, consumption, entertainment and leisure (Azaryahu 2000; Rebhun and Waxman 2000). Azaryahu (2000) suggests that, as a model of advanced capitalist culture, America emphasizes freedom, individualism, hedonism, self-fulfillment and consumption. Yet, the Israeli context in which “Americanization” had taken place, he says, was the collectivist, socialist discourse of the early, pioneering ethos (p. 45). This may account for the unusual admixture of individualism and collectivism in Israeli culture. Other research has indicted familism and pronatalism in Israel as having a strong anchor in Jewish tradition, and being sustained by the memory of the Holocaust, the loss of life in military conflict and terrorist attacks, and demographic insecurity (Reminnick 2000; Sered 2000). In other words, while penetrated by Western influences venerating individualistic values, Israelis’ conceptions and practices in general, and with regard to free time in particular, need be understood also in the context of strongly collective traditional cultural orientations. An additional factor that may affect how Israelis spend and feel about their free time, is the fact that Israel is a Mediterranean country. This may be significant because of both cultural and physical attributes. Indeed, a recent study indicated cultural differences in attitudes to leisure lifestyle, finding that Italians have a Veblenian approach to leisure, seeing it as a mark of status, as opposed to Americans who associate working long hours with higher status (Bellezza et al. 2017). That is to say, culture may shape the way we conceive and evaluate leisure. Moreover, the warm climate or natural resources in Israel, as in countries such as Greece, Italy or Spain, may bring about certain pastimes and customs. For example, due to the long hot summers, these countries share a tradition of siesta time, including the partaking of the main meal at lunchtime. Local practices, such as closing businesses in the middle of the day, reflect cultural differences in the organization of time and the way it is spent, but also in how time is perceived. Yet, as I have already noted, Israel has been deeply influenced by American culture, including values of a liberal economy, so that today, few businesses in Israel close for a siesta break, though the idea of siesta remains as does the main meal during the day.

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The blend of European, Mediterranean culture with American ­values is significant here in a number of ways. Firstly, even though Israel adopts many American practices, whether business hours or fast foods, the culture still retains certain values of European, Mediterranean societies which undoubtedly shape the way time is used and perceived. Secondly, conceptions of self may be shaped by individualistic notions that promote self-management and self-cultivation. On the other hand, as I have noted, these self-concepts may, at the same time, be influenced by the high value attached to family and community. In a study conducted in Israel, Oyserman (1993: 1005) concluded that “Individuals adhere to an amalgam of individualist and collectivist perspectives on personhood and the self,” because Israel follows Western values as well as traditional culture. Moreover, the Israeli middle classes have been found to draw from contradictory cultural repertoires that promote both global discourses of productivity and fulfillment as well as local, family-oriented values (Frenkel 2008; Izraeli 1997; Lieblich 1993). Thirdly, opposing discourses and conflicting construals of self are likely to shape free time practices whether self-oriented or shared with others. For example, examining cultural changes in Israel between the years 1970 and 1990, Katz et al. (1997) indicated an increase in hedonism and individualism and the legitimacy of concern with the self, as well as a rise in the valuation of leisure as compared with work. However, they point out that family and collectivity continued to be highly valued. Since the question of leisure and its cultural implications has been given very little attention in research in Israel in recent years, the current exploration of free time may shed light on conflicting or perhaps blending discourses of individualism and collectivism in that respect. This dualistic tendency may be particularly prominent among the middle class that draws on liberal, individualistic discourses promoting entitlement, yet still highly valorizes familial and social relationships. The book focuses on the middle class, specifically the upper-middle class, relatively neglected by sociological research in Israel to this day, particularly in relation to matters of culture and identities. Past research on the middle classes in Israel has related to issues of ethnicity or religion and class (Selinger 2013; Cohen and Leon 2008; Leon 2010) as well as cultural stratification (Katz-Gerro and Shavit 1998), lifestyle (Almog 2004; Blumen 1998, 2004) and cultural values (Birenbaum-Carmeli 2001), but it has been less inclined to focus

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on individual perceptions and subjective meanings. The middle classes have not been given due attention, despite the fact that they constitute about half of the Israeli population. This includes two subcategories generally used in the literature and statistic data: the middle class (24.7%) and the upper-middle class (25.7%) (Bank of Israel 2012). Moreover, the middle classes have been at the center of public debate in Israel since the summer protests of 2011, which focused on the rising cost of living, particularly housing. These issues became central concerns in the ensuing elections (in the years 2013, 2015 and 2019) that highlighted the middle classes, continuing to receive much attention among Israelis and in the media. Considering their significance, both in number and in recent public debates, the middle classes warrant closer scrutiny. Yet, of particular importance here, given the book’s focus on culture, is the cultural dominance of the middle classes. There is evidence from American studies that members of the upper-middle class are thought to have, and be, what others aspire toward, as well as having a strong impact on the ways people think about the self (Bellah et al. 1985; Betz 1992; Lamont 1992; Schor 1998; Wolfe 1998). In Talk of Love, Swidler (2001) describes her middle and upper-middle sample as “comfortable suburbanites” whose “mainstream culture, with all its confusions and contradictions, provides the background against which most other Americans define their understandings of love” (p. 3). Therefore, understanding middle class culture, she says, “matters far beyond the suburban milieu” of her sample. In addition, the standard of living of the middle class serves as a visible model of lifestyle to be emulated (Schor 1998). These standards of material comfort, are defined, not only among the members of the class, but also by media images and consumer culture. As Michelle Lamont (1992) points out, “the mass media and the advertising industry constantly offer upper-middle-class culture as a model to members of other classes, who often come to emulate it or to define their identities against it” (p. 1). In Israel, too, the middle classes are depicted in the media as successful and affluent as well as being presented as a model for a desirable lifestyle. Finally, as Illouz (1997) suggests, the selfhood of members of the middle class fits with a therapeutic narrative of self-improvement. This is significant particularly since the book, being concerned with the link between free time and the self, also explores self-management practices that are performed during that time.

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Theoretical Concepts Before I conclude this theoretical introduction by summing up the objectives of the book and enumerating questions with which it deals, I shall briefly present theoretical concepts that the book offers. These will be used to deal with the central issues reflected in the very title of the book, namely Time, Freedom and the Self. • Freedom from and freedom to These terms are used in the book to define the duality of freedom in conceptions of free time. Freedom from refers to the notion of free time as being free from external constraints such as work, family duties or other commitments. Freedom to suggests a more positive idea of free time when the individual envisages her/himself as free to spend that time as s/he chooses. While this distinction draws on Fromm’s discussion of freedom and past definitions of leisure as mentioned earlier, its novelty here lies in the book’s focus on the very question of freedom in that realm of time that is generally considered to be free. • The hierarchization of free time The hierarchization of free time is a theoretical concept that I have coined in order to analyze participants’ evaluations of free time. It suggests that time is categorized according to what is conceived as worthy and desirable. Given the focus of this book on the cultural construction of time, by examining how free time is hierarchized, we may better understand how cultural scripts of worth shape conceptions of both time and the self. The concept, the hierarchization of free time, is thus hoped to shed light on what is culturally valued and why certain activities are classified as positive, while others are not. • Disciplined freedom An additional term that I offer is disciplined freedom4 (Shir-Wise, 2018). I use this theoretical concept in order to deal with the ­disciplinary nature of conflicting discourses that call for the management of time and the self while also creating a sense of freedom among individuals. By this term, I refer to the ways by which notions of agency,

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freedom and autonomy may mask disciplinary discourses that operate as powerful, taken for granted dictates, as they shape both meaning and action related to free time and conceptions of the self. • Conspicuous busyness The term conspicuous busyness5 refers to a mode of self-presentation that highlights busyness even in free time. Alluding to Veblen’s notion of conspicuous consumption, I have coined the term conspicuous busyness to suggest a reversal of the Veblenian leisure–class relationship, my emphasis being on the display of busyness, rather than leisure, as a sign of status and central to the presentation of a worthy, productive self.

Objectives of the Book The purpose of Time, Freedom and the Self is to shed light on questions of freedom and identity via the issue of time use in general and free time in particular. Rooted in discussions concerning discourse, cultural repertoires, agency and subjective meaning, the book treats the examination of free time as a means to illuminate these ever-vexing issues. Moreover, as I said earlier, Israel is characterized by the individualistic values of Western culture, while also being collectivistic, its culture anchored in a Jewish, traditional heritage, as well as socialism, which promote communal values. As such the study of free time practices in Israel may contribute to a more complex understanding of conceptions of self and happiness in cultures which are increasingly exposed to global, cosmopolitan trends (Beck et al. 1994). In order to gain insight into the above issues, the book investigates free time from three perspectives. Firstly, my inquiry seeks to reveal how participants spend their free time. The second angle is the actor’s perspective, focusing on the perception and meaning of free time practices for the individual. Lastly, I explore free time in the context of cultural frames of interpretation and dominant discourses. More specifically, I pose the following sets of questions: 1. Is there a notion of free time defined in distinction from other types of time? What is its relative weight and importance for the individual?

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2. What do people do in their free time? Which free time practices serve the self- project and which are perceived as a means of escape from the onerous demands of the self-project, work or other commitments? To what extent is free time self-oriented and to what extent is it collective? 3. How do people evaluate the use of free time? What is viewed as worthy and what is considered unworthy? Is there a difference between passing the time and filling it? 4. How do people understand happiness and in what way is it related to conceptions of self and the use of free time? 5. How is free time experienced and what motivates action? 6. What do our free time practices reveal about contemporary discourses and how do these and related disciplinary regimes direct the individual’s interpretations and experience? To what extent is free time indeed free, and how is it linked to agency and the self? In what way are individuals’ choices inflected by prevalent cultural discourses and paradigms, and which are the most influential paradigms with regard to free time? 7.  How can time pressure, indicated in time use research, be explained in the light of other studies that point to more free time and less working hours than in the past?

Notes 1. However, in a study conducted in New York, Kusserow (2012: 195) suggests that the lower classes also draw on individualism but that it is practiced and perceived differently as a “hard” individualism focused on the cultivation of characteristics such as self-reliance and perseverance, while that of the middle and upper classes is “soft” individualism based on the nurturing and expression of unique and personal feelings and ideas. 2. The self-project relates to the idea of a reflexive self, whereby one reflects on one’s self-identity and works to construct “reflexive biographies” (Beck 1992; Giddens 1991). Yet I also refer to Foucault’s notion of the constitution of the self in both his earlier (1979) and later works (1987, 1988). The earlier work emphasizes the power of discourse in forming selves, whereas the later work shifted to a slightly more active notion of the self, involving “practices” and “technologies” of self. 3. I relate here to his earlier work in particular. 4.  This concept appears in an earlier version of Chapter 6 entitled, “Disciplined Freedom: The Productive Self and Conspicuous Busyness in

40  M. SHIR-WISE ‘Free’ Time,” which was published in Time and Society, 2018. https://doi. org/10.1177/0961463x18769786. It is published by permission of the publisher, Sage Journals. 5. “Conspicuous busyness,” is a term that I coined in my doctoral dissertation (2016) entitled, Time, Freedom and the Self: Free Time in an Israeli Middle Class Context. The concept also appears in the above-mentioned article.

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Southerton, Dale. 2003. Squeezing Time: Allocating Practices, Coordinating Networks and Scheduling Society. Time Society 12 (1): 5–25. Southerton, Dale, and Mark Tomlinson. 2005. Pressed for Time—The Differential Impacts of a ‘Time Squeeze’. The Sociological Review Issue 53 (2): 215–239. Southerton, Dale. 2006. Analyzing the Temporal Organization of Daily Life: Social Constraints, Practices and Their Allocation. Sociology 40 (3): 435–454. Spillman, Lyn. 2002. Cultural Sociology. Oxford: Blackwell. Statista. 2016. Average Daily TV Viewing Time Per Person in Selected Countries Worldwide in 2016. https://www.statista.com/statistics/276748/averagedaily-tv-viewing-time-per-person-in-selected-countries/. Accessed May 2017. Stebbins, Robert A. 2001. Serious Leisure. Society 38 (4): 53–57. Stebbins, Robert A. 2007. Serious Leisure: A Perspective for Our Time. New Brunswick, NJ: Transaction Publishers. Stebbins, Robert A. 2012. The Idea of Leisure: First Principles. New Brunswick, NJ: Transaction Publishers. Sullivan, Oriel. 2008. Busyness, Status Distinction and Consumption Strategies of the Income Rich, Time Poor. Time and Society 17 (1): 5–26. Swidler, Anne. 1986. Culture in Action: Symbols and Strategies. American Sociological Review 51 (2): 273–286. Swidler, Anne. 2001. Talk of Love: How Culture Matters. Chicago: University of Chicago Press. Thompson, Edward P. 1967. Time, Work-Discipline and Industrial Capitalism. Past & Present 38: 56–97. Tocqueville, Alexis de. [1838] 1969. Democracy in America, trans. George Lawrence and ed. J.P. Maier. Garden City, NY: Anchor Books. Turkle, Sherry. 1995. Life on the Screen: Identity in the Age of the Internet. New York: NY: Touchstone. Triandis, Harry Charalambos. 1995. Individualism and Collectivism. Boulder, CO: Westview Press. Turkle, Sherry. 2011. Alone Together: Why We Expect More from Technology and Less from Each Other. New York: Basic Books. Turkle, Sherry. 2012. The Flight From Conversation. The New York Times. http//www.nytimes.com/2012/04/22/opinion/sunday/ the-flight-from-conversation.html?pagewanted=all. Accessed Apr 2012. Veal, Anthony J. 2004. A Brief History of Work and its Relationship to Leisure. In Work and Leisure, ed. J. Haworth and A.J. Veal, 15–34. New York: Routledge. Veblen, Thorstein. [1899] 2007. The Theory of the Leisure Class. New York: Oxford University Press. Wajcman, Judy. 2014. Pressed for Time: The Acceleration of Life in Digital Capitalism. Chicago: University of Chicago Press.

52  M. SHIR-WISE Wajcman, Judy, and Nigel Dodd (eds.). 2016. The Sociology of Speed: Digital, Organizational, and Social Temporalities. Oxford: Oxford University Press. Waterman, Alan S. 1993. Two Conceptions of Happiness: Contrasts of Personal Expressiveness (Eudaimonia) and Hedonic Enjoyment. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology 64 (4): 678–691. Weber, Max. [1930] 1992. The Protestant Ethic and the Spirit of Capitalism, trans. Talcott Parsons. London: Routledge. Wellman, Barry. 2004. Connecting Communities, On and Offline. Contexts 3 (4): 22–28. Wilde, Oscar. 1994. The Picture of Dorian Gray. London: Penguin Books. Wolfe, Alan. 1998. One Nation, After All: What Middle-Class Americans Really Think About God, Country, Family, Racism, Welfare, Immigration, Homosexuality, Work, the Right, the Left and Each Other. New York, NY: Penguin Books. Wright, Katie. 2011. The Rise of the Therapeutic Society: Psychological Knowledge and the Contradictions of Cultural Change. Washington, DC: New Academia Publishing. Yian, Hogne. 2004. Time Out and Drop Out: On the Relation Between Linear Time and Individualism. Time Society 13 (2/3): 173–195. Zerubavel, Eviatar. 1991. The Fine Line: Making Distinctions in Everyday Life. Chicago, IL: The University of Chicago Press. Zerubavel, Yael. 1995. Recovered Roots: Collective Memory and the Making of Israeli National Tradition. London: University of Chicago Press. Zhao, Shanyang, Sherri Grasmuck, and Jason Martin. 2008. Identity Construction on Facebook: Digital Empowerment in Anchored Relationships. Computers in Human Behavior 24 (5): 1816–1836.

CHAPTER 3

What Is Topaz?

The town Topaz, is the setting of the book. Intended as a backdrop for the protagonists of the study, this chapter presents a vignette of the town so as to better understand the participants, their lifestyles and their free time practices. In addition, by illuminating the characteristics of the town, it is hoped that this may shed light on how social structures may affect social life. The chapter presents findings from interviews with key local figures of the town as well as textual data drawn from the municipality’s official Internet site, from municipality brochures and fliers, and a local magazine distributed in residents’ mailboxes. While the interviews and the textual analysis constituted the main tools for obtaining a sense of the place and the participants of the study, I also participated in a number of free time activities in the town. During the seven-month period of interviewing, I took part in a singing group, in activities at the country club and the synagogue. I also participated in a number of women’s sessions following the Yemima method, a spiritual method for developing conscious awareness. I sat in the local café, which served as an opportunity to observe people, and I went to several ­cultural evenings and town events. While I do not analyze these per se, I found that my participation helped me gain a deeper insight into the activities and sites of which participants spoke, as well as enriching my sense of the town in general and the way people use their free time in particular.

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I give the town a fictional name in order to protect the privacy of the participants of the study. Yet, the picture painted in the following, presents a realistic depiction of the town. It is hoped to give the reader a feel of this Israeli kind of environment, not entirely different from other Israeli suburban towns. Topaz is a small Yishuv (town) of 6 square kilometers, situated in the center of Israel, not far from Tel Aviv. The Hebrew term, Yishuv, includes suburban-like localities such as Topaz, as well as rural towns or villages. Much like American upper-middle class suburbs, Topaz boasts a high standard of living with an above average income and a particularly high level of education. The town is characterized by its emphasis on civic engagement and volunteerism, the environment, education, culture and leisure. Located near a forest, away from the bustle of the city, Topaz has a pastoral atmosphere, while still having access to shops, cultural centers, sports and leisure facilities. As you drive into Topaz, you cannot help but notice the palm trees lining the main boulevard, the traffic circles with rock gardens and olive trees, and the nature strips with their colorful shrubs and flowers. Playgrounds, lawns and sculptures dot the landscape and recycling bins can be seen outside the private homes and low-rise apartment buildings. In the mornings, the streets are fairly empty as many residents commute daily to the city centers. But at lunchtime, the place comes to life as children return home from school, chattering to their friends as they walk along.1 Later in the day when the town’s residents have returned home from work, you can see adults jogging or walking energetically along the sidewalks or running tracks. The shopping centers are particularly busy in the late afternoon and their open structure lends a communal feel to the place as people stop to talk in public spaces. Both adults and children can be seen shopping, eating in fast food restaurants and cafes, or doing errands. In the late afternoon, children are seen in their Scouts uniforms, dance or gym clothes, walking down the streets on their way to enrichment activities. According to the Central Bureau of Statistics (CBS 2018), the socio-economic level of the town was rated 9 on a 1–10 scale with 10 being the highest. The average monthly wage of employed workers was 14,386 NIS, and Topaz is one of the ten towns with the highest average incomes in Israel (Forbes 2018). Its population of 21,000 (2016) is Jewish, with 40% under the age of 18 and a similar percentage aged between 30 and 59, the approximate age group of the participants of the study. In addition, Topaz has been indicated as having a particularly high

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proportion of academics. It is also rated among the most favorable places in Israel for raising children, taking into account factors such as education, culture, leisure and environment (parks, playgrounds). The average number of children per family is between 3 and 4, slightly higher than the national average.2

Topaz Through the Eyes of Local Figures The following presents findings from the interviews with five key figures from the town who, besides sharing expertise related to free time ­activities and events, also provide insight into the characteristics of the town which was described by them as a communal, family town with a high socio-economic level. These figures included the mayor, the Rabbi, the managing-director of the cultural center, the manager of the country club, and the coordinator of religious cultural events. While some questions were similar to those posed to other participants of the study, these major figures were also asked about issues linked specifically to their area of expertise. For example, the mayor was asked about free time activities that he would like to promote in the town, while the manager of the country club was asked about difference uses of the facility for various sectors. On the other hand, they too, were requested to respond to questions such as how they relate to free time on a personal level as well as professional, or what they considered their favorite pastime. The interviews with these key figures were intended to give a sense of the town, its residents and lifestyle, highlighting patterns rather than personal perspectives. Moreover, these figures were selected with a view to illuminate the town from the vantage point of leaders in the community, who, as we shall see, do indeed, contribute to a clearer picture of the setting. Perhaps the main value of the interviews presented in this chapter is that these key figures spoke about the residents of the town and their free time practices from an outsider’s point of view. Although it is true that, due to their positions, they may be likely to present a positive picture of the town, they seemed to be less concerned with self-presentation than the other participants of the study who talked about free time more subjectively. As we shall see below, the key figures delineated a family and community oriented town with a relatively high standard of living. Their words suggest a comfortable, pleasant setting where residents, both religious and irreligious, live in an unusually harmonious coexistence.

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A Family Town Gabe has been the mayor of Topaz since 2003. He presents an ­idealized picture of living in a suburban town, or locality as Topaz is defined by the CBS. The picturesque image of the town is juxtaposed with his description of the bustle of a big city. A suburb is, by definition, a family town. If we give it some sort of image, it’s a family, let’s say 4 or 5 people in a little cottage with a tiled roof, with a little garden and a dog or 2, in open space. That is, if you ask what is the healthiest, most intimate, safest environment to raise a family and raise children, that’s what would come into your head, that would be the answer. Nobody would think about a high-rise building, 20 floors with intersections and busy traffic and commercial life and buses and all that. This is the ideal place to raise families.

The mayor’s ideal image of a “family town” brings to mind the American Dream of a suburban home with a white picket fence. On the other hand, his description of urban living evokes an image of a concrete jungle with the rush and noise of the city, as opposed to his depiction of the town, which conveys a sense of tranquility, security and intimacy. The comparison to city life accentuates the organic lifestyle in Topaz, which is presented as the ultimate environment for raising children. This emphasis on family was indicated by other key figures, who pointed to the many free time activities targeted at families. For example, events such as summer outdoor movies, Independence Day celebrations, the Purim parade and the annual Tu’Bishvat happening in the forest were all described as “family events.”3 Moreover, a large proportion of activities offered by the cultural center, as well as the country club, were directed toward children. Although the current study does not focus on the free time of children in the town, but of their parents, a brief look at the way children spend their free time, may shed light on their p ­ arents’ attitudes toward time use. Children’s free time was, indeed, a central concern both of parents and leisure institutions in the town. Shimon, manager of the country club says that the club offers activities for adults, yet without targeting families, it could not “survive.” Similarly, Gali, the manager of the cultural center comments, “It’s very much a family town. You can usually bring the adults because you can bring the kid.” The cultural center caters largely for children and youth, offering a variety of enrichment activities ranging from music to sport and science.

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Sending children to various activities was considered by these cultural directors to have dual value. Firstly, as Shimon says when relating to the aims of the country club, one objective is to “keep children busy.” Yet, the interviews with these key figures imply that sending children to extracurricular activities is also perceived as having added value. Gabe, the mayor, explains, Parents push a lot to enrichment activities. There is a slang, that they want the child to have one activity for strength and one for the brain [rhymes in Hebrew]… a bit of dancing or gym that builds the body physically. Brain can be music, can be chess, can be computers…English or Maths…private lessons is also a kind of, you could say, utilization of free time…the private lessons that is like the overflowing of the education system into children’s leisure time, it’s like our work overflowing into our leisure time.

These words imply a perception of free time as a precious commodity to be utilized productively. Interestingly, the word “fun” was only used once throughout all these interviews, and besides that, not one of the key figures used words such as pleasure or fun when describing children’s or adults’ activities or when indicating their purpose. Rather, parents are presented as carefully calculating how to maximize the use of their children’s free time in order to contribute to their development and perhaps provide them with tools for future success. The comparison between private lessons and work may imply that both involve effort and are considered to be ways of getting ahead. Yet it also suggests that private lessons, like work, invade the freedom of free time by crossing boundaries, or as he put it, “overflowing into our leisure time.” By organizing children’s leisure, middle class parents engage in what Lareau (2002) calls “concerted cultivation” as they make an effort to cultivate children’s development. This reflects an approach to leisure as time to be utilized for self-development, which parents “push,” as we see in the words of Shimon, the country club manager. Relating to the hard work that swimming training demands, he says, Parents push kids to competitive stuff, that is if parents didn’t push, I’m not sure that the kids would be able to train so intensely…the good ones go to competitive…

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Like Gabe in the quote above, Shimon says “parents push,” suggesting that the activities are believed to be valuable for their children. He says that the council also supports competitive sport, perhaps indicating that the approach is valued and widely accepted in the town. The words “the good ones” link the activity with notions of success, implying that it is considered a worthwhile way for children to spend their time. These activities require, not only effort, but also monetary investment. As Gali, director of the cultural center says, “don’t forget that leisure is something that costs money.” The undoubtedly high cost of multiple activities and private lessons may be indicative of the high socio-economic status of the town. Middle Plus Indeed, interviews with the key figures revealed certain distinctive features of upper-middle class life. The mayor attempts to characterize the residents of the town saying, Middle plus, which means it’s an educated population, means it’s a relatively young population, a population of families with a certain income and above. I think we try to make a concentrated effort with our free time, what is defined quality time, perhaps as compensation for the general lack of time, that’s ongoing.

Gabe’s words suggest a rushed lifestyle that requires a determined effort to create free time, which may make up for time paucity. Besides linking the upper-middle class, with a high level of income and education, Gabe points to time pressure as a distinctive mark of middle class life. As we saw earlier, work was indicated as “overflowing into our leisure time.” Thus, free time is perceived as requiring “a concentrated effort” to transform it into “quality time.” Indeed, as I have noted in Chapter 2, research has shown that higher income earners and those with higher education, have less free time than lower income, less educated workers (Gershuny 2005; Katz et al. 2000; Offer and Schneider 2011; Robinson and Godbey 1997). When describing members’ sport routines at the country club, Shimon sheds light on their daily schedules. He suggests that their sports habits are tied to work hours, saying that the busiest time at the sports center is between 8 and 10 p.m. when people finish work. Yet, he says

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that, unlike other places, in Topaz there are people at the club until 10 or 11 a.m. He explains, “either they start work late or they’re freelancers or they’re between jobs. I haven’t seen that in a lot of places. At a lot of places from 9 in the morning you don’t see a soul.” So, on the one hand, residents are depicted as working until late, yet their hours may be more flexible thus allowing them time for sport, though it may not necessarily be considered pleasure as Shimon suggests: There are those who are crazy about it and there are those who say, listen, I don’t have a choice, I need to watch my figure, mainly women, I need to watch my figure, I go to the gym, I don’t like it. In the end I enjoy it because when you do physical activity you have all sorts of…a good feeling at the end. Both that you‘ve burnt calories and also that you look better, so they enjoy the results but not everybody enjoys the process. It’s not easy for everyone.

His description suggests that while sport may be perceived as leading to positive results, not everyone necessarily enjoys it. Although it is experienced as hard work, because it is associated with desirable outcomes, it is considered worth investing in. Shimon’s words imply that social expectations for woman to have a desirable appearance may be the central motive for sport among women. It is interesting to note that, when referring to body shape and weight, besides mentioning women in particular, Shimon uses the Hebrew feminine form of the verbs throughout. As well as characterizing the members’ sports habits, he refers to the monetary side of the investment saying, Relative to the money they have, they are very frugal. They make sure every shekel they spent is justified, For example, they will freeze their membership when possible. They take care of their money. It’s intelligent people who work hard for their money and they make sure nobody takes it from them for nothing.

He adds that this is true of other places, where he has worked in the past with an even higher socio-economic status. Shimon’s portrayal of the upper-middle class members implies long working hours and a high level of education as being linked to their socio-economic status. His words suggest that having money does not mean indiscriminate spending, but rather careful consideration regarding its use. This conception of the residents is also evident in Gali’s words. She says, that those who

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“have money in their pockets don’t like to pay” and that “they think they deserve to get things.” Her words, like Shimon’s, suggest a sense of entitlement that may characterize upper-middle class, as well as implying that its members have a knowledge of money management. Certain practices were also indicated as being linked to upper-middle class lifestyle. Referring to long summer vacations overseas, Gabe, the mayor, says, “that’s how it is in a similar socio-economic cross section, in other cities too.” He points to the implications that going overseas for a long time may have during the year, saying they “have to make it up, particularly at work.” This may account for the “general lack of time” mentioned above. Shimon, too, notes that the country club, even the swimming pool, is empty in August since people go overseas. The mayor sees this style of vacations as somewhat problematic, since the town residents, “overdo holidays or increase the investment into something that is A. intensive and B. certainly expensive.” He attempts to explain this phenomenon suggesting that social pressure may be particularly compelling in a town setting. I assume that this order of preferences is also affected by a kind of social atmosphere or social influence that exists in our community. Because the community isn’t big, it’s small and people talk you know, this one came back from a trip and this one went on a trip, and this one’s going on a trip so..there is some sort of social pressure that will affect priorities.

Gabe suggests that the communal nature of the town may intensify the extent of social pressure. This keeping up with the Joneses (Schor 1993, 1998) may not simply be a matter of conspicuous consumption in the Veblenian sense (Veblen 1899/2007). In other words, social comparison is not just a trigger for consumption as a means to signify one’s social status, but may shape one’s very conception of what is worth striving for. Free time may thus be influenced by what is socially accepted at a given time and place. Many free time practices were described as trends. After mentioning a recent survey that found that the number of people who did sport in Topaz was high relative to other cities, Gabe, the mayor says, There is a trend among the Israeli population, I’d say altogether, but I can, if I want to be more precise, it’s among the Israeli population that is similar to ours, you could say. Yes? Whether it’s fashionable trends in jogging or bike riding.

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The words “similar to ours” suggest that free time trends may be linked to class. Sports activities, such as jogging or cycling, are presented as popular among upper class populations in particular. Shimon notes that activities at the country club are determined by demand, which depends on trends like Zumba, Pilates, Feldenkreiz or Yoga, which he says “is back in fashion.” Even children’s activities, he says, are influenced by fads, giving an example, “It’s become a fashion for kids to work out at the gym.” The extent of social influence may be heightened by a sense of community in two ways. Firstly, the familiarity in a communal town may mean that individuals are more likely to be affected by the behavior of fellow residents. Secondly, this may make individuals more conscious of the gaze of others. Recognizing the communal nature of the town, Gabe says that public events are heavily invested by the municipality, which puts in “a great deal of energy, a great deal of budget resources.” Yet, he sees these events as more than simply leisure, saying that rather than being “mass entertainment, it is deeper, heavier,” implying a distinction between low and high culture. Elli, a coordinator for municipal events, points out that the residents can be very critical regarding community events, explaining that they are, “a high standard people who consume culture.” When asked if this could be related to their socio-economic status she replies, We feel it all the time in everything. Both in the amount and in the kinds, in the quality… The attitude is an attitude of quality, an attitude that you have to be the best you can in everything.

These words imply a notion of free time that is linked to abundance and variety, yet still demanding quality and excellence. At the beginning of the interview, she had described the cultural organization where she works, as similar to a communal center but more “sophisticated” and “modern.” These interviews present free time activities in the town as high culture, quality and sophistication. Gali, the manager of the cultural center, enumerates the many activities offered to both adults and children. This includes regular weekly enrichment activities, as well as concerts, plays, lectures and communal events. Describing her work as manager she says,

62  M. SHIR-WISE Much more than free time, you could call it culture… my job is to provide culture. To give extra-curricular education, to educate what isn’t in the books… but through other means, particularly theatre, dance, music… it’s a kind of different language.

This conception of her role as manager implies a notion of free time as serious business. In her view, free time is not simply a matter of ­enjoyment or passing the time, but must be utilized by filling it with valuable content. The following sharpens a distinction between high “quality” leisure of upper classes described above, and the “happy” nature of leisure in lower classes. She says, Actually, where the socio-economic level is lower and it’s harder for people, then the tendency is to bring things that make you happy, make you dance, so that they forget their troubles…

Whereas free time activities in Topaz were depicted as “culture” or a form of investment with expected results, the above quote presents free time practices among lower socio-economic populations, as a distraction, and even an escape from the difficulties of everyday life. This may explain the noticeable absence of words such as fun and pleasure, which one might expect to be used in relation to free time. For an affluent community like Topaz, the emphasis is clearly on culture and enrichment rather than fun or simply passing the time. Harmony: Religious and Irreligious Cultural and communal events described by key local figures also delineated a harmonious coexistence of different sectors of the town. While the conflict between religious and irreligious populations in Israel has received much attention, particularly in the media, the two sectors in Topaz were reported as participating in common free time activities, and interviewees made a point of showing that integration was encouraged. Elli, the events coordinator, caters for the religious sector. She indicates mixed events as, “something that stands out in Topaz,” explaining that, “the town’s Rabbi is central to this.” Relating to the religious

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population of the town, she describes them as “open minded” and “very, very involved in all the cultural activities.” Similarly the Rabbi says, “In Topaz it’s very hard to differentiate between religious and ­irreligious in leisure culture.” He says that they pursue the same free time practices. Shimon, manager of the country club makes a similar observation saying he doesn’t see a difference between the two sectors’ participation in the club. He tries to explain, “in the end, they draw from the same data, the same media, the same advertising and everyone behaves more or less the same.” So while the religious sector draws from traditional, religious discourses, the fact that they are exposed to “the same” cultural scripts may explain the similarity in the free time practices. Elli describes a harmonious relationship between the two sectors. She gives examples of events that illustrate this. Communal Yom Kippur4 prayers, for instance, integrate the religious and irreligious. She explains that it takes place in a hall in the cultural center rather than in a synagogue, so that the setting does not feel threatening for the irreligious participants. The goal of integration was also given as a reason for the municipality’s decision to change the day of the annual cycling race. Elli explains that it used to take place on Saturday5 (Shabbat), but was changed to Friday, so as to enable the participation of religious residents. The change to Fridays was implemented for a number of other communal events. She says, “It’s all done pleasantly…It comes from relations that have been formed over the years.” Rather than being a source of conflict, free time activities are presented as reflecting and promoting tolerance and mutual consideration. As we have seen, the relationship between the religious and irreligious sectors of the town was described as congenial, yet distinctions between the two groups were nevertheless indicated. That is to say that, while interaction between them was described as harmonious, the two sectors were still clearly defined and differentiated. I must note here, that, in contrast, ethnic distinctions did not emerge at all in the interviews. This is not due to ethnic homogeneity in the town. On the contrary, while the population is all Jewish, the ethnic origins of the town’s population are evenly divided between Ashkenazi and Mizrahi ethnic backgrounds.6 As opposed to the distinctions drawn regarding religiosity, ethnicity was not mentioned by any of the local key figures, nor by participants in their interviews, whether relating to identity or free time.

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Local Texts The local texts examined in the study were comprised of both official and commercial texts. As discussed in Chapter 2, discourses and cultural repertoires may have an impact on an individual’s outlook including conceptions and uses of free time. This examination of texts as cultural scripts follows models such as Goffman’s analysis of gender representation in advertisements (1976), Illouz’s study of love in magazines, and the Oprah Winfrey Show (1991, 2003), and McGee’s (2005) research on self-help literature, all of which recognize the crucial role of cultural sites in shaping the way we perceive our selves and the world. A Smorgasbord of Activities and Events In order to learn more about the characteristics of the town, I looked at municipality information that appeared on the Internet site as well as fliers and brochures that were distributed in residents’ mailboxes. This was also hoped to provide more details about free time activities that are offered to residents of Topaz. In addition, I examined a popular local magazine, focusing on feature articles and advertisements, to gain a better understanding of cultural scripts to which residents are exposed. On the one hand, these may reflect the lifestyle and worldviews of the readers, but they also serve as sources of local knowledge (Geertz 1983/2000) and provide cultural prescriptions, which may shape notions of desirable selves, happiness and worthy lifestyles. On the home page of the municipality Internet site, Topaz is presented as a young, centrally located, environmentally friendly town. The municipality boasts rich and varied activities for all ages including courses and lessons in creative arts, dancing, sciences and sport. The site also mentions communal cultural and sports events that take place annually. There are several links that give details about each of the main centers mentioned by the key figures above. As well as the site, fliers are distributed by mail, informing residents about upcoming events. Every month, a calendar of events shows sports, cultural and children’s events. For example, the month of May included the annual race, a trip to Jerusalem for Jerusalem Day, a Shavuot7 family happening, concerts, plays, and activities for babies. In addition, at the beginning of every year, a brochure of about 70 pages is distributed, offering a wide range of enrichment activities to which one can enroll for the coming year. Although

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most of the brochure is devoted to children and youth, adults are also offered a variety of activities such as drama, arts and craft, music and sport. Also distributed in mailboxes twice a month are the two local magazines, one of which I have chosen to examine since almost all participants reported reading it. Much like other town magazines, it includes feature articles, regular columns, interviews, gossip, and local news about sports and communal events, volunteer work, awards for educational achievements and municipality news. Its glossy, colored pages also present advertisements for a variety of goods and services, including cultural events, like concerts or outdoor happenings, and free time activities such as drama, arts, sewing or sports classes. Scripts of Success, Family and Community However, besides uncovering free time options available in the town, the textual analysis of the magazine also revealed local cultural scripts. Columns offering advice about health, parenting, or finances; travel articles about exotic destinations and adventures; interviews with local residents; a four-page feature article in each edition; and advertisements, all conveyed salient narratives. While I do not present a detailed content analysis of the magazines, I shall focus on the ads and feature articles, which presented personal interest stories. These narratives generally included themes of self-work, achievement and individuality, interwoven with family or patriotic values. The motif of success was evident in an article that tells the story of a “world renowned” cardiac surgeon who is “considered a pioneer in his field.” Yet family values emerge as the doctor regrets not having enough time to spend with his family. In another edition, the feature article depicts a young man in the elite navy seals who is presented as a hero serving his country but also described in individualistic terms as someone who “always set himself goals.” In addition, he is portrayed as one who has “the ability to get along with people.” This blend of individualistic qualities together with collectivistic values was apparent in many of the narratives. The quality of being able to connect with others was apparent in a story that presents a “charming man” with a “warm smile” who has “… developed a model for workshops and guidance that provides practical tools for all areas of life, using content from nature, survival and the bible.”

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The photos in the article show groups of people participating together happily in, what appears to be an enjoyable activity. The article celebrates practical, instrumental methods, but it also conveys collective values of cooperation. A woman in another article is described as using a range of therapeutic methods to treat “various problems and types of distress.” These stories suggest that problems can be overcome by using tools offered by different types of approaches. Besides the emphasis on setting and reaching goals, as the key to success in all areas of life, these articles highlighted the value of helping others. The November magazine presents the experiences of a young man who spent two months volunteering on an exotic island which he describes as “real freedom, a sense of release…you take deep breaths and live the moment.” While the article is about giving to others, it is presented as contributing to positive feelings about the self. Additionally, being on a beautiful, faraway island is linked to freedom. Indeed, many of the segments on travel, associated exotic destinations and exciting adventures with a sense of freedom and living the moment. Even though success was presented as an ideal to strive for, family emerged as a dominant value. An article presenting Yona, a successful career woman, begins by asking her to define herself. She replies, “Firstly and before everything else, I am Tom’s wife and Rona, Rick and Alan’s mum.” The question of career versus family becomes a point of interest in the article. Like the other stories, an important part of the narrative is telling about the person’s past. In other words, showing how the protagonist became who she is. When mentioning the completion of Yona’s post-doctoral studies, the writer describes her saying, “being a skilled multitasker (or in other words, I don’t know how she does it), she managed…” The words in brackets express the writer’s admiration but also a sense of inadequacy, which may be aroused in readers of such articles, all of which presented a desirable figure, worthy of emulation. Interestingly, while the cardiac surgeon regretted not having enough time for his family, the career woman presented herself as managing all and putting her family first. Perhaps, as a woman, she feels she must prove her ability to be able to manage a career without this being detrimental to her role as mother or wife. By telling the life history of the person, the story of the past as well as the present, it emphasizes the trajectory that led to the success of the self-made hero. The personal angle portrays the individual as sensitive and caring, yet s/he is presented as taking control. In this way, by

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relating a life story, the personal details highlight individuality. However, the presentation of the person as a worthy model may encourage a selfgaze among readers as these ideals serve as a yardstick for comparison. The advertisements, too, highlighted many similar themes. Besides a small number of ads for supermarkets, accounting services or insurance, a large number were centered around improvement, self-work or pleasure. Many advertisements promoted free time activities showing images of attractive holidays, restaurants and cafes and offering art, sport and music activities. Others advertised home decorating, interior design, furniture, gardening and new homes. One slogan for a new building project read, “everyone can,” suggesting that every individual is able to reach set goals. Images of modern, immaculately designed homes encourage a standard of living presented as desirable and worth pursuing. Besides calling for the improvement of one’s home, ads prescribed the management and cultivation of ones’ children. They advertised a variety of children’s activities, summer camps, party organizers and photographers, all promoting the investment in one’s children, as did ads for diagnostic testing and therapy. Indeed, there were a great number of advertisements that related to self-improvement, whether physical or psychological. This included ads for clothes, hairdressers, cosmeticians, personal sports trainers and diet groups, of which the majority were targeted at women. In other words, women, in particular, were encouraged to manage every part of their bodies, including hair, skin, nails and figures, with some ads presenting before and after pictures. In addition, there was a surprisingly high proportion of ads for counseling or therapy, offering family and couples guidance, treatment of anxiety or stress as well as counseling for personal growth. The above may be significant in a number of ways. Firstly, the texts shed light on the consumption practices of the residents of the town, many of which are associated with free time, though not all would be considered leisure. Ads promoted the consumption of both goods and services as a means to achieve a worthy self that spends one’s time in a desirable way. Articles, like the ads, reflected therapeutic principles of self-work in order to achieve success, while still keeping to values of family and community. In this way, the above texts help us understand the sociocultural standards of the town. Finally, by illuminating underlying discourses, we may gain a deeper insight into what shapes, not only actions but also perceptions and meanings.

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As we shall see in the following chapters, many of the above themes emerged in the findings from interviews with participants. On the one hand, a large number of free time activities were found to be selforiented, with some being directed at self-management and others focusing on hedonic pleasures. On the other hand, family and social ­interaction were central to many free time practices.

Notes 1. In Israel, primary schools finish at about 2 o’clock and high school an hour or so later. 2. I do not provide references for these data about Topaz as they would disclose the true identity of the town, which I have taken measures to conceal. 3. Purim is a Jewish festival where people dress up in costumes and give gifts of food, much like on Halloween, and Tu Bishvat is a tree-planting holiday highlighting nature. 4. Yom Kippur—The Day of Atonement is considered to be the holiest day in the Jewish calendar, a day spent fasting and praying. It is reportedly observed to some extent by a high percentage of the Jewish population in Israel (Guttman 2012). 5. Since Saturday is observed as the Jewish day of rest, religious Jews do not take part in events such as cycling races on the Shabbat. 6. Ashkenazis refer to people with European or Anglo origins and Mizrahi, or Sephardi ethnic groups, refers to those with Middle Eastern or African origins. 7. Jerusalem Day commemorates the reunification of Jerusalem in 1967, and Shavuot is the festival marking the receiving of the Ten Commandments and the Bible.

References Central Bureau of Statistics (CBS). 2018. List of Localities, in Alphabetical Order. Israel Central Bureau of Statistics. http://www.cbs.gov.il/ishuvim/ reshimalefishem.pdf. Accessed Aug 2018. Forbes Israel. 2018. The Ten Municipalities with the Highest Average Income in Israel [Hebrew]. http://www.forbes.co.il/rating/list.aspx?en6v0tVq=II. Accessed Aug 2018. Geertz, Clifford. [1983] 2000. Local Knowledge: Further Essays in Interpretive Anthropology. New York: Basic Books.

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Gershuny, Jonathan. 2005. Busyness as the Badge of Honor for the New Superordinate Working Class. Social Research 72 (2): 287–314. Goffman, Erving. 1976. Gender Advertisements. London: Macmillan. Guttman Center for Surveys. 2012. A Portrait of Israeli Jews: Beliefs Observances, and Values of Israeli Jews 2009. Jerusalem: Israel Democracy Institute and Avi Chai–Israel. https://en.idi.org.il/media/1351622/ GuttmanAviChaiReport2012_EngFinal.pdf. Accessed Nov 2015. Illouz, Eva. 1991. Reason within Passion: Love in Women’s Magazines. Critical Studies in Media Communication 8 (3): 231–248. Illouz, Eva. 2003. Oprah Winfrey and the Glamour of Misery. New York: Columbia University Press. Katz, Elihu, Hadassah Haas, Shosh Weitz, Hanna Adoni, Michael Gurevitz, and Miriam Shif. 2000. The Leisure Culture in Israel: Changes in Cultural Behavioral Patterns 1970–1990. Tel Aviv, Open University [Hebrew]. Lareau, Annette. 2002. Invisible Inequality: Social Class and Childrearing in Black Families and White Families. American Sociological Review 67 (5): 747–776. McGee, Micki. 2005. Self Help, Inc.: Makeover Culture in American Life. New York: Oxford University Press. Offer, Shira, and Barbara Schneider. 2011. Revisiting the Gender Gap in TimeUse Patterns: Multitasking and Well-Being among Mothers and Fathers in Dual-Earner Families. American Sociological Review 76 (6): 809–833. Robinson, John P., and Geoffrey Godbey. 1997. Time for Life: The Surprising Ways Americans Use Their Time. University Park: Pennsylvania State University Press. Schor, Juliet. 1993. The Overworked American: The Unexpected Decline of Leisure. New York: Basic Books. Schor, Juliet. 1998. The Overspent American: Upscaling, Downshifting, and the New Consumer. New York: Harper Perennial. Veblen, Thorstein. [1899] 2007. The Theory of the Leisure Class. New York: Oxford University Press.

CHAPTER 4

Conceptual Mapping: What Is Free Time?

Free Time and the Free Self After having looked at how the key local figures view the town and its residents, I now explore the main body of findings based on interviews with residents of the town. Perhaps the most appropriate way to begin would be to examine the way in which the participants of the study define free time. In this chapter, I look at how the concept of free time is understood by the participants, and explore meanings attached to their definitions. What differentiates free time from the rest of our time? Which characteristics define it? To what extent is it associated with freedom? In what way is free time related to notions of the self? What do the participants’ definitions have in common with those of social scientists? Most scholars in the field have preferred the word leisure, rather than free time, defining it in several ways. As we have seen in Chapter 2, some explain leisure in terms of what it is not, for example when one is not working either in the domestic domain or out of the home, or activities that are not linked to necessities, which include biological needs, personal care or traveling to work. Others place the emphasis on characteristics of leisure, which has been described as a time for relaxation, pleasure or self-development and considered to have psychological and physical benefits. Choice has also been suggested as a definitive factor and, as Rojek (2010: 1) states “leisure has become almost irretrievably fused with the concept of freedom.”

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Based on the study’s findings, I will argue that the attractiveness of free time may rest on its association of free time with freedom, which is rooted in the discourse of individualism and liberalism. I must note here, however, that the term “free time” was used when asking participants to define the concept. Thus, perhaps this was more likely to bring to mind questions of freedom. Nevertheless, as we have seen, even scholars who prefer the word “leisure” still emphasize freedom and choice. For the participants of the study, freedom was central when defining free time. This chapter thus examines the concept of free time through the lens of freedom, following a distinction set forth by Erich Fromm (1984), as discussed in Chapter 2. Although Fromm does not relate specifically to free time, I draw on his notion of freedom, distinguishing between freedom from and freedom to. The former refers to freedom from constraints, while the latter implies a more positive notion of freedom of choice.

Freedom From Much like definitions that appear in leisure literature, free time was defined by many participants as time that is free from duties or pressure. This included commitments at work, domestic tasks and obligations to others or oneself. These duties may be felt to be multitudinous, and thus associated with stress and a sense of overload. Free time, as opposed to committed time, was thus conceived by participants, as time that is, not only free from commitments, but also free from the psychological strain related to them. Freedom from Work and Obligations The perception of free time as freedom from various duties, implied a dichotomous division. Free time is presented in contrast to the binding nature of external commitments. For some participants, it was defined in relation to work. Yigal, a 57-year-old lawyer, defines free time as “Time that is non work… my time is divided into work and free time.” Others extended the definition to commitment in general. This was evident in the words of Eran, a 43-year-old naval officer who says, “It’s time when I don’t do work, when I don’t do things that I have to do and don’t like.” The repeated use of the negative form accentuates the appeal of free time as freedom from performing tasks one has to do. But it also suggests a dichotomy between the obligatory duties that one does not necessarily

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like and the notion of free time as doing what one does like. It seems that, though not explicitly said here, freedom from duties may bring about a sense of choice, since, in contrast to work or other duties, free time allows one to do what one likes to do. Interestingly, while most male participants, despite being fathers, referred to the burden of duty regarding work and tasks in general, the focus of female participants, including career women, was largely on obligations to others. For example, Ilana, 42-year-old mother of 3, who works full time in a high position at the ministry of defense, while also pursuing doctoral studies, describes free time as “when I don’t have any duties, not in the house and not with the children.” Interestingly, despite her multiple roles, free time for her is freedom from domestic duties and childcare. Beth is a nurse and mother of 4, whose definition of free time focuses on obligations to others, but also to herself as we see in the following words, “Time when I don’t have to do anything for anyone and I don’t have to do for myself.” Here the emphasis is on the fact that she doesn’t have to do anything, irrespective of whether it is for others or for herself. When one feels that one is obligated to perform a duty, it may be experienced as an encroachment on one’s freedom of choice. It seems that it is not only a matter of being free from extrinsic determinants that is felt to be freedom, but also the feeling that one is free from a sense of inner compulsion. This feeling of freedom may be brought about by the release from stress associated with duties, particularly when perceived as mandatory and allowing little choice. Indeed, participants indicated the mental strain of day-to-day commitments as a source of pressure. Free time, on the other hand, was envisaged as a time when one can “…get away from routine, get away from the day-to-day pressure.” Yasmin, 42, mother of 4 and full time teacher, uses the metaphor of a pressure cooker to express her sense of stress associated with constant busyness saying, “when you work, work all the time it’s a pressure cooker.” This metaphor was also used by Itai, 47-year-old father of 3, local head of security. He describes the negative effects of his busy daily routine. Work hours, all the ongoing chores in the house and for the family and reserve duty that I do, or studies, all these things, they’re things that..it’s a kind of pressure cooker that makes you constantly in a duty and it doesn’t allow free time for, let’s say for thoughts.

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His overloaded schedule has dual consequences. Firstly, it creates pressure due to the sense of commitment to multiple duties, which, as we have seen may be interpreted as a lack of choice. Secondly, it simply does not allow enough free time, which may alleviate pressure by enabling time “for thoughts.” This mental, and perhaps emotional freedom, is valued as worthy in itself. The individual is thus able to enter a mode that differentiates free time from other time, as these words illustrate, “like doing things leisurely, slowly, without getting stressed…it’s simply the way things are ­ done, without pressure.” Freedom from stress and pressure is perceived as generating a feeling that shapes the manner in which things are done, and, consequently determines our perception of this time as free. We shall see that this characteristic of free time as a form of escape from day-to-day duties and the pressure associated with them, emerged as both a motive and result of certain activities. But, firstly, I shall look at how participants’ experienced stress, in order to shed light on the conception of free time as a form of escape, precisely from stress. The Enemies of Free Time If we are to understand the appeal of free time as freedom from pressure, we must take a closer look at the sources of this stress by exploring the way participants perceive and experience work, domestic and family duties or other commitments. This section is not intended as a description of external constraints per se, but as a means of deepening our insight into the need for escape from the resulting stress and thus illuminate this aspect of free time. Moreover, we shall see how these domains are presented as antithetic to the realm of free time, which is associated with freedom of choice. While much has been said about the relationship between work and leisure, my intention here is to examine participants’ expressions regarding their experience and feelings about work, particularly as related to perceptions of work as a constraint, and the feelings of stress that may result, not only from a sense of overload but also as a consequence of a perceived lack of control and an absence of choice in this context. This is not to say that work was associated exclusively with negative feelings. Indeed, it was also presented as satisfying and rewarding. However, I focus here on its relationship with free time as described by the participants, particularly on the meanings attached to free time as freedom from day-to-day routine.

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Firstly, work was described by many as having no boundary and being all-consuming. The lack of a clear division between working time and non-working time was presented as a problem resulting in frustration reflected in their words, and their tone of voice. Technology, in particular, was indicated by many participants as a major contributing factor to the temporal invasion of work. Yaron is a travel agent who feels pressured by the constant obligation required by his work, which is perceived as having no boundaries. “My work is.. demanding, demanding… I work with several companies and my obligation to them is 7/24, 364. It’s a commitment.” He describes this sense of total commitment as being exacerbated by technology, which allows the permeation of work into all areas of life. Yaron’s frustration is clear when talking about the use of the computer after working hours, “Really, sometimes I feel enough, enough, enough! I feel like breaking it and throwing it to hell!” The strong language and the repetition of the word “enough” conveys a sense of exasperation due to his feeling of a lack of control that can only be alleviated by the removal of the instrument that is felt to bring about the blurring of boundaries between work and non-work. Yaron also indicates cellphones as contributing to the problem of constant availability, which prevents the demarcation of a clear distinction between personal time and working time. Like Yaron, Oren, 42-year-old father of 5, who works in a hi-tech company, uses the word “enough” to express his frustration at being chained to his phone at all times. “Listen, I’m attached to this thing all the time, mainly because of work…to see emails, calls too, but mostly emails. Yes it’s ..it’s enough.” His words suggest that he feels a lack of control, as he is constantly “attached” to his phone, without the possibility of relief. The absence of boundaries between work and non-work is expressed, not only as crossing time but also space. Neta, a 54-year-old mother of 4 who holds a high position in education, describes the dual invasion of work into the private domain. “Today, you are expected to be available 24 hours a day. Work is in the home, the home is in the work.” Here, too, the words imply excessive demands that have no spatial or temporal limits. Yet it is not just the possibility of being available at all times that seems to bother her, but also the fact that others expect it. In other words, it may make the individual feel forever under the control of others. Similarly, this penetrable border between work and the home is described by Michal, a 46-year-old mother of 3, currently unemployed, who recalls the demanding nature of her previous employment, indicating that it had

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taken over her private life and time with her family. She describes the expectation of constant availability in her former position as a lawyer for a big firm, a consequence of the technology that enables and promotes this blurring of boundaries. Beyond working hours, the phone is always on, available… The day ends and you say, wait a minute, what have I done? In the end, I haven’t sat with the kids and I haven’t spoken to them, and yes, at the same time you organize the kitchen a bit or go up or down the stairs but it’s not.. you’re still talking on the phone.

Clearly, Michal sees the kind of work that expects round-the-clock availability, as a heavy price to pay at the expense of family. This encroachment of her work duties upon free time with her children generates feelings of guilt as she reflects on it at the end of the day. Indeed, this is indicated during the interview as a central motive for leaving her previous demanding position in the law firm and her plans to open her own practice at home. However, rather than solving the problem of blurred work/ home boundaries, for Madlyn, 42-year-old mother of 2 young children, working from home, was presented as contributing to the problem. She addresses the difficulties as she deliberates about the “right way” to manage boundaries between work and domestic duties, saying, The question is what interferes with what- if the house with work or work with the house, yes? There may be days that are more pressured in work, so I say to myself, the house can wait… I ask myself if this is the right way to go, because I always hear and people always talk about having to define time for this and define time for that. Exactly, a separation…. I could, maybe try a bit more organization so that.. I don’t feel the pressure.

Madlyn seems to be concerned with the absence of a clear boundary. Comparing herself to others, her words suggest a sense of inadequacy at not managing her time in a more organized manner. As well as the overflowing of work into the private domain, spending long hours away from the home was perceived as problematic. Work is presented as an external force that dominates various spheres of one’s life. Erez, 42-year-old small business owner and father of 4, says he comes home from work at 9 or 10 every evening. Pointing to the price of these long working days, he says “there are days that I don’t see the kids, 3 days in a row.” Besides not having time with his children, long

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hours affect the quality of one’s free time. He explains, “Because I work so many hours throughout the week, on weekends I am exhausted.” Work, for Erez, is an obstacle that stands in the way of living as he wishes. His words reveal a sense of regret and frustration, “the minute you are in the depth of intensive day-to-day work, you don’t have time to live. You live surrounding your work…I am not living the life I would like to live.” Work is thus experienced as a pervasive force that invades his freedom. It is perceived as constraining the individual’s autonomy by permeating all areas of life. Since long working hours were considered constrictive, many expressed a wish for change, however this was not necessarily regarded as feasible. The amount of time one spends working may be felt to be beyond one’s control because work is considered a means to economic security. As one participant says, “It’s financial security but if I could I would reduce the volume significantly…” Although working less hours is presented as desirable, attempts to do so may prove unsuccessful as Neta points out, “As much as I try to get home early, it doesn’t happen, it doesn’t work. Because that’s the nature of the work… It’s something I would like to change but I don’t really manage to…” Despite one’s intentions, work is perceived as an external force, which subjugates the individual. In this way, the notion of free time as freedom from work, is closely linked to a wish for free choice. It is not so much the actual work that is presented as the source of dissatisfaction, but more so a perceived lack of control, as is evident in these words: “My dream is to get to a point where I don’t have to go to work. Where I would work, but I don’t have to go to work.” The obligatory nature of work is linked to the notion that it restricts the individual and one’s freedom of choice. In other words, the idea of being free from work is envisaged as freedom. Eran contemplates his imminent retirement from the navy, saying “Maybe I’ll manage to do more things that I want to do, and don’t have to do.” This contrast between doing what one wants as opposed to doing what one has to do, emerged as central in participants’ definitions of free time. Not working is thus perceived as an opportunity to escape the fetters of work that dominate one’s life and obstruct individual freedom. Transitions in the work status of various participants promoted reflection, which allowed a more critical examination of their experiences, making them more aware of the stress associated with work. As we saw earlier, Michal, after having left her demanding position in a law firm, was able to look back from a more objective perspective, so that she

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could now acknowledge the extent of her stress that was related to the absence of boundaries in her former place of employment. In contrast, Eden, a 48-year-old mother of 5, reminisces regretfully about that time when she was not constrained by the demands of work. Until two years before the time of the interview, she had been a full time homemaker. She says she now works “200 hours a month,” leaving her little time to do what she enjoys. Work is perceived as invading her free time and, consequently, as a hindrance to the positive feelings associated with it. She associates free time activities of the past with “relaxation,” “serenity” and feeling “calm,” as she recalls that time wistfully, saying, I want to go back, at least to.. to those things, say, walking, reading… It’s a kind of feeling of serenity. Taking my time for serenity, for relaxation. And I don’t have that today. Even if I have time, I am on edge. I don’t feel calm.

Eden suggests that work may be linked to stress for two reasons. Firstly, it leaves little free time to perform free time activities that may relieve pressure. Secondly, the all-consuming nature of work has a negative psychological effect so that even when one is not actually working, a feeling of stress is nevertheless present. As we have seen, free time was defined as freedom from work, duties or other commitments. But it was also indicated as freedom from the feelings of tension that accompany such obligations. Vera, as opposed to Eden, has recently left a demanding managerial position. She too, points to the way in which work encroaches on free time without the individual even being conscious of its pervasiveness. “I had no time for myself and I wasn’t even aware to what extent I didn’t have time for myself, because, in fact most of my time would be spent on working….” Vera suggests that work is an obstacle preventing time for oneself, including reflection. However, this is not only due to the time spent at work, but also to the constant mental preoccupation that makes work all encompassing. She explains, “Most of my time, all of my thoughts, most of my deliberations were in this one sphere that is work.” Some participants specified the nature of their work as the cause of emotional and physical strain. Pam, who had retired a week before the time of the interview, describes her former managerial position as “Draining, exhausting.” She explains the negative consequences in the private domain, “After work, I really didn’t feel like doing anything. I

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didn’t feel like doing anything. I wouldn’t cook, clean. I would come home collapsing. I would let out my nerves.” The feeling of being physically and emotionally drained and stressed was indicated as a catalyst for her decision to retire. She reported that she now spends her free time enjoying hobbies, which she describes as therapeutic. Yet, it was not only long hours or managerial positions that were indicated as causing stress. Abe, a 45-year-old father of 4, works as a physiotherapist. At the time of the interview he was on sick leave, which helped him understand the extent of his psychological involvement in his work, “I can tell you that these two weeks that I haven’t been working, definitely showed me how much emotional energy it takes out of me…I really feel how much, how much work it is treating people and their suffering.” For Abe, who works part time, the very idea of working full time is inconceivable, “since I have changed to a half load and think about working full time, and I think how do you do such things? It’s terrible. It is wasting your life on work (laughs).” Abe sees his work as emotionally demanding, but also as having the potential to take over one’s life if the quantity is not managed. It seems that working part time gives him a sense of control over his work rather than making him feel that his work dominates him. The emotional strain of work was indicated as making free time all the more valuable. Like Abe, Beth, who works as a head nurse in a psychiatric hospital, relates to the psychological stress involved in health care saying, “I have to decide if this mother can see her 4-year-old son or can’t see him…So when I come home, I sometimes need to do stuff that doesn’t require thinking, like Facebook.” Free time is presented as fulfilling the need to escape emotional burdens associated with work, allowing respite from its psychological demands. Here, free time enables relief from thoughts, while, as we have seen, others considered free time as an opportunity for thinking. For Beth thoughts are associated with stress, hence the desire to escape them, whereas others, who felt overloaded with work or other duties, felt they had no time for simply thinking which they perceived as a means of relief from day-to-day stress. In both instances, it seems that freedom from the mental strain associated with external constraints may be central to the individual’s perception of free time. As indicated earlier in the participants’ definitions of free time, the home and family, like work, are experienced as obligations from which one feels a need to be free. Not having to answer to others and being

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free from the burdens of domestic duties, emerged as an essential component of free time. While I shall dedicate an entire chapter to the Family Self, my focus here is on the perception of free time as free from duties in the private domain. Without a closer examination of how people experience the commitment to family and the home, it is difficult to understand the notion of free time as an escape from the perceived sense of constraint associated with it. Multiple duties in the home were indicated by participants as a major contributing factor to a feeling of constant busyness. Domestic chores and childcare were presented as never-ending both among male and female participants. Itai, the security officer, enumerates the various duties associated with family, “organizing, waking the kids, taking them to school, making sandwiches, making lunch. All these continuous things and then work…after that, 6 in the evening, getting home, so it’s dinner, helping the kids with homework…” The ongoing demands of childcare, in addition to work, are presented as interminable. However, for female participants, the sense of being overwhelmed by constant demands in the home was particularly salient. The incessant nature of maternal tasks is conveyed in the words of Ofrah, 44-year-old mother of 2, who says, “all the time you think, what else do I need to do with them, what do I have to organize, who do I need to take, who do I need to pick up, when are the tests, when are the projects? No, I am not free.” The link between continual demands of motherhood and the individual’s sense of freedom is expressed explicitly. It seems that it is more than just being busy that makes her feel that she is not free. As we saw in relation to work, a sense of constant preoccupation and obligation to others may be experienced as a lack of autonomy, generating feelings of frustration and stress. The all-consuming nature of domestic tasks is expressed as, endless and repetitive. Yasmin says, I’m busy with the house a lot, a lot. It’s washing again, I took it off, then folding it, and it’s organizing again. We eat lunch, now I have dishes I have to wash. I don’t know, it’s all the time. It’s simply all the time.

Housework is perceived as a burden that is never lifted and dominates time. Female participants presented domestic duties as both numerous and also never-ending. Besides the multiple tasks that are perceived as mandatory requirements over which one has little control, a feeling of

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being taken for granted, not being noticed or appreciated, was indicated as intensifying a sense of constraint. Michal’s following words express the resulting frustration. I find it very hard, like all the.. all the work, all the.. the washing, cooking, organizing and like.. and I feel that nobody..nobody sees it. I don’t think anyone understands how hard it is.

Her feeling of overload is exacerbated by the lack of understanding from those around her. These words suggest that the multiple, never ending chores, are experienced as compromising one’s sense of freedom and autonomy, which is compounded by the fact that her efforts are not acknowledged by her family. Indeed, some participants reported feeling free only when removed from the source of pressure, namely the home. When expressing her thoughts about freedom, one mother says, When we go on a trip. When we get out of the house.. because if I’m at home, there’s always something to do. There’s always some chore, something or other. So I feel freest outside the house.

By distancing herself from the domestic domain, she is able to avoid duties and the sense of commitment linked to them, thus allowing her to feel free. For others it is not enough to be away from the home. One mother said she feels free, only when going “on holidays alone without the kids.” Childcare may be associated with an encumbrance to her freedom. While some mothers may find it enough to remove themselves from their domestic surroundings, others feel a need to distance themselves from their children in order to really feel free. For Beth, it is the combination of multiple duties that is experienced as hindering her freedom. She says, that she doesn’t feel free because she has “lots of commitments around. Children, family, studies, work…” Now that we have seen the link between work or domestic commitments and one’s sense of freedom, we must examine how this is related to perceptions of free time. Indeed, busyness and overload were presented by participants as an obstacle to free time in two ways. Firstly, many regretted not being able to do the things they enjoy, due to constant time pressure. Secondly, participants indicated multiple duties as hindering the performance of free time activities. In other

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words, even when one does have free time, its quality is negatively affected by one’s sense of time pressure. Throughout the interview, Eden conveys feelings of stress resulting from a lack of time. She says, “I don’t have time, really… really, I don’t I don’t. You’re busy all the time.” She talks about wanting to do sport and go to drama classes, concluding each time with the words, “I don’t have time.” For her, even everyday pastimes that require less time or planning, present a problem. Talking about Facebook she says, “I want to go into look but I don’t have the time… I don’t have time to watch clips.” In this way, time pressure is presented as the enemy of free time. Interestingly, many other participants expressed a wish to find time for simple, everyday free time activities. They did not relate to “serious leisure” (Stebbins 2001) such as hobbies or activities that require skill but rather to pastimes that need little training or preparation, such as reading, walking or simply having time to sit at the computer. Leah, for example, explains why she doesn’t go walking, an activity she perceives as contributing to positive feelings. I used to go walking but unfortunately I don’t do it anymore, because I’m knocked out… the truth is that when I used to go, there was something that.. I would enjoy walking. I had my MP (music player) I would walk and it really made me feel good. But unfortunately, I just don’t get to it now, I am so tired in the evening after I finish everything that I don’t have energy.

For Leah, the exhaustion resulting from her continual demands of working full time and being a mother of 4 young children, prevents her from doing activities which she enjoys, and she regrets not having the energy to pursue them. Perhaps then, when people say they don’t have free time, they are actually trying to communicate their lack of energy to perform free time practices. Many participants described a feeling of fatigue at the end of their day. After enumerating the many duties of his busy daily routine at work and in the home, Itai says, “at 9 we get to our ­bedroom exhausted.” Debra also says, “I get to bed so tired that I don’t even read.” In this way, while one may have free time, it may be rendered ineffectual. The physical and mental burden of childcare was evident in the words of Amos, the youngest participant in the study, a 32-year-old father of a 6-year-old and twins aged one and a half. He describes the stress

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associated with raising twin babies, saying, “I have a load on me that’s all the time.. it weighs on me all the time, even in the little, little free time that I have. I never feel free.” The association of free time with freedom is clear. The lack of free time for him means that he doesn’t feel free. Later in the interview, he again describes the implications of his demanding role as father saying, “Two little kids run after me all the time, and they don’t give me a second to myself. I don’t have one second to myself on the weekend.” He accentuates the fact that it is “all the time,” repeating that he does not have “a second” for himself, even on the weekend, a time that is generally conceived as work free and associated with free time. Though the pressure he experiences is undoubtedly heightened by the fact that he has twin infants, like others, a constant commitment to family or work, not only takes away from one’s free time, but also has a negative effect on how one feels during that time. Alon, for instance, does find time to play soccer, a pastime he loves, yet his feelings of pressure impair the quality of that time. The question of energy comes up as he voices a wish to be able to play soccer after a good night’s sleep so that he could go “with strength and energy.” He describes the pressure brought about by the tasks he rushes to get done before he leaves to play, pointing out how this affects the quality of this free time activity. …here I come, pressure to get stuff done, I get it all done, look at my watch, quickly put on shoes and go. It’s not quality time. And you say, wow, free time is supposed to be fun.

The reality of his free time does not suit his conception of how free time should be. Feelings of pressure mar the quality of free time for Alon, so that, while he still manages to perform the activity, it is not experienced as he wishes. This constant feeling of busyness and pressure is expressed by Yasmin, who, as we saw earlier, used the metaphor of a pressure cooker to convey the stress she experiences. Here, she adopts the metaphor of a race, which doesn’t allow time to stop for pleasure due to its constant fast pace. So in the day to day there is no.. there’s no time for pleasure… I am in a race after time. Every minute is calculated…If it was possible to slow down the pace…it would be much more pleasant, much nicer.

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Yasmin experiences time pressure as an obstacle in the way of personal time, which could be experienced more positively, if she were able to relax her pace. Her lack of time was also thought to impair her free time with others. She says she does not have enough time or energy to go out with her husband “because of this race in life.” For Maddy, 44-year-old psychologist and mother of 5, time pressure is perceived as constraining her freedom to spend time with her parents who live in another city. She says, I would like to go visit my parents more in Jerusalem but often the free time I have is not enough time in a row so I always do, you know, calculation in my head, is it worth it? Like by the time I get there it will almost be time to get back so you know … sort of time constraint itself stops you from doing things you would want to do.

Interestingly, Maddy points out that the problem is not simply a matter of not having free time, but rather of not having enough consecutive time. Her words suggest that when free time is fragmented, it is difficult to utilize it as one would like. A view of free time as a commodity that must be saved and accumulated was evident in the words of Adina, 51-year-old mother of 5 who works from home as an interior designer. She compares free time to material goods, saying, “I think its never enough, like you don’t have enough money, or enough of that or a car and.. but you can live like that.” The implication is that she would like to have more free time, yet just as she accepts economic restraints, she comes to terms with time limits, experienced as being beyond her control. Now that we have seen how participants experience time pressure, we can better understand the conception of free time as freedom from various commitments and stress in everyday life. Furthermore, this may shed light on the perceived need and value of free time for the individual. Participants described the duties or obligations of work and family as areas of their lives that allow little freedom and choice. Free time, in contrast, was presented as time when one is free from those commitments. Yet, participants also included in their definitions, a more positive notion of free time as freedom to do what one wants or enjoys. The next section examines such definitions that focus on this individualistic notion of free time, envisaged as a realm of freedom.

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Freedom To Choice, Agency and Control Freedom and choice were salient themes in participants’ conceptions of free time, presenting the individual as a free agent. The centrality of choice is evident in the use of the word “choose” apparent in the definitions of many participants: Freedom to choose what I do in that time. When you choose to do what you want, what you feel like. I choose what to do, for how long and without anyone standing over me.

These quotes imply that the escape from everyday duties is more than simply being free from pressure that they generate. Free time is also perceived as an opportunity for individual freedom, when one can choose, thus enabling the individual to do what s/he wants and likes. This may generate a sense of personal control and autonomy. One participant declared, “My free time is mine” while another said simply, “I am my own master.” These words illustrate the value attached to being an autonomous individual who is able to manage time and control how it is spent. This is intricately linked to a sense of freedom as is expressed in the words of Daniel, 43-year-old computer programmer and father of 5. He says, “you control the time you are off … because I get to choose what I do when I do it.” Time management is associated with a feeling of control, which emerged as a definitive characteristic of free time. Participants’ definitions focused on the perceived freedom attached to it, rather than the nature of activities performed. Sarit, illustrates how even domestic chores can feel like free time when colored by a sense of control. Talking about her day off from work, she says, A morning like that is free time, even if I did washing and that, it’s free time. The fact that I manage myself, it’s a free day.. because I am not dependent on what others dictate to me or by others’ needs or by work needs or by commitments or this and that. Like I have.. I do have things I have to do but I control the time for myself.

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While her words reveal duties linked to others, her sense of c­ontrol is presented as an integral feature of individual freedom. A contributing factor to her feeling of agency is the fact that she has time for herself, a central characteristic of free time indicated by other participants. While many indicated that they felt they didn’t have enough free time, particularly time for themselves, there were those who felt they had sufficient time, having seemed to have found a balance. This was experienced as freedom to manage time which increased their sense of control. This feeling of control was evident in the words of Yigal, who expresses satisfaction from the boundaries he draws between work and free time. He says, “I take work home when I decide to take it home, and not that it chases me home… I control my time.” He presents himself as an active agent who takes, decides, and controls his work and the way he manages his time. For him, work does not take over his life. Liron, CEO of a large company, manages to mix business and pleasure rather than separating the two. He explains, Since my work is with my partner, like we’re also friends, friends and partners, so work is also a bit of recreation. We always go out to a restaurant for lunch so it’s part of recreation because we talk a bit, discuss, a bit about life, a bit about the family, a bit about work, politics. It’s actually part of my free time.

For Liron, the balance between work and free time does not seem to require effort on his part since the two overlap. In this way, he too, feels that free time is not subjugated by work but that he has the freedom to determine the way his time is spent. For other participants, this balance involves a conscious effort. Time management is presented as crucial to the attainment and worthy use of free time, which the individual should attempt to control. For instance, relating to time for herself, Leah says, “I do try to find the time. Even to lie in bed and read, as far as I’m concerned is time for myself.” For Oren, the valuable commodity of time for oneself must be forcefully attained. He says, “sometimes I manage to steal a few hours.” This struggle between busyness and free time is conveyed in Neta’s words. Being conscious of the stressful feeling due to overload as opposed to the calmness generated by freeing that time, enables her to take control. She says, “Sometimes I feel it’s too much and I don’t have

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time to breathe and I want a bit of quiet, so okay, then I decide to myself that the next Saturday I’m not doing anything.” Those participants who expressed a dissatisfaction regarding free time, were often those who felt that external factors hindered their freedom, whereas those who experienced a sense of agency, expressed a more positive perception of their free time. Time for the Self If commitments to others were described as constraining one’s freedom, personal time emerged as a central characteristic in participants’ definitions of free time. Maurice, 50-year-old veterinarian, father of three, says succinctly, “Free time is time when I am alone.” When asked if he considers time with his family free time, he says, “no, because it’s not free.” In other words, for Maurice, having time to himself allows freedom and defines free time. Michal, his wife, also relates to free time in this way, explaining in greater detail. What is free time for me?..time when I’m alone. Again, yes, alone,meaning that I’m not.. it’s not that I’m alone and I’m cooking, or alone and I’m doing the laundry but really when suddenly.. there is food, nothing urgent needs to be done and I decide that.. let’s think, what can I do? So often it’s TV because it’s available and convenient. Also reading, also I do a bit of meditation and that. Oh yeh..even computer sometimes, I consider it time..mainly Facebook, let’s say, free time. Or even when I read information, I also consider that free time. That’s when I’m alone.

We see that free time is not determined by the kind of activities done, but by the fact that one has time for oneself. Unlike Sarit, however, Michal does not consider time alone as free time if it is used to perform domestic duties. For her, once she feels free from duties, she is able to choose from a range of everyday activities. Thus, though not stated explicitly, she implies that choice is of essence. Freedom, autonomy and control are presented as central to the attraction of having time to oneself. Thus, while the appeal of having time for oneself is undoubtedly connected to a desire to be free from duties or obligations to others, it seems that time alone was also associated with a positive conception of freedom. Being alone allows the individual to be free to choose how to spend the time, but also generates a sense of mental and psychological freedom.

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This state of mind was indicated by participants as the major appeal of time alone. As we saw earlier, being able to simply think is valued as worthy in itself. Time for oneself allows that liberty. Ilana explains, “When I have time for myself, I’m alone… it’s my time for thinking, my head, nobody..there’s nothing around me. It’s me with myself.” These words express not only a need to escape duties or remove oneself from situations of pressure, but suggest a certain feeling of freedom that is made possible by being alone. Indeed, many participants associated having time for oneself, with a state of serenity. It was expressed as fulfilling a need to have freedom to simply relax. Alon explains the importance of having time to himself when he gets home from work. “I need my quiet. Like I sit, then I eat… and relax.” Ilana, too, describes her need for time to herself, “After all the craziness of the day is over, I need my time, without anyone talking to me. Like then I allow myself free time for myself.” The contrast between the busyness of the day and being alone, accentuates the tranquility of the latter. Similarly, for Itai, the busy security officer, quiet is what characterizes being alone. When describing time at night, he says, “It’s a quieter time. Yes. I find for me the best quality time is the night hours when everyone is sleeping, I have time to myself to think.” Like participants quoted above, Itai values the mental freedom of being able to simply think. For him, this is what elevates free time alone to the status of “quality time.” In this way, having quiet time alone allows mundane, everyday activities to be experienced positively. The positive state of mind that was indicated in participants’ definitions of free time, linked it to a sense of well-being, presented as crucial to the self. Free time was associated with self-fulfillment, self-expression and the psyche. One participant described it as time “for the soul, for quiet, to clear the head.” Another deliberates about its characteristics, voicing her reflections as she grapples for a definition of free time. She begins by defining it as time when she can “express” herself and “feel good,” continues by describing it as “quality time” for herself when she is “free to choose” what she does, and concludes saying, “it’s more.. like.. feeling full, feeling whole, feeling better.” Her words suggest that free time is an arena for self-expression, satisfaction, freedom of choice and a sense of wholeness and fulfillment. For her, free time is ascribed psychological benefits that contribute to one’s sense of self. Yaron, too, suggests that free time is closely connected to one’s spiritual welfare, yet he ties this to one’s freedom from obligations.

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It’s time that you have … that is free from commitments that is work, or all sorts of tasks that you have to do and.. and you can really do things for your soul, for your spirit…

This quote exemplifies the duality of the conception of freedom in definitions of free time. On the one hand, it is perceived as a time when one has freedom from duties, commitments and pressure, whether they be at work, in the home or other areas. On the other hand, it is also construed as allowing freedom to choose to do as one wishes. Yet, the words of the participants suggest that the quality of free time is closely linked to the conception of it as a state of mind. It is not just a matter of having an opportunity for pleasure or fun, but conceived as an arena to nurture one’s very “soul” or “spirit.” Freedom from is thus intertwined with freedom to. Freedom from external constraints, allows the individual freedom to choose and have time for oneself which is translated into a state of mind when one is free to think, relax, express oneself or do as one wishes.

Concrete Illustrations of Free Time We have seen the way many participants define free time, yet others found it difficult to provide a conceptual definition, preferring examples to illustrate their understanding of free time. Freedom from obligations to others and having time alone were characteristic of many of the instances described as free time. In other words, activities presented by participants were indeed illustrative of the more abstract definitions of free time explored above. Searching for a way to define free time, Ofrah says, “Free time is watching a series on TV without anything interrupting me.” Being free from external constraints that are conceived as interruptions, is an integral part of free time for Ofrah. Similarly, Leah explains, “For me free time is also sitting..that is, after I put the kids to bed so it’s just sitting and watching something on TV…” Television viewing was used by many participants as an example of free time. This is not surprising since watching television, as well as other media use, was found to be the most popular and time-consuming everyday activities among the participants of the study. I shall therefore devote an entire chapter to media use, where I present participants’ feelings and perceptions regarding media practices.

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Listening to music and reading were also mentioned by participants when asked to define free time. Abe and Alon both linked listening to music to a sense of freedom. Abe says he feels free when he has “time to listen to music at home in the morning, when there’s nobody around.” Alon, too, points to the connection between feeling free, music and being alone, saying, “When do I feel the most free? It’s funny but you’ll laugh. When I am alone at home listening to music. Really.” Interestingly, when asked to define free time, effortless, everyday activities were indicated as illustrations of free time. We saw earlier that participants who regretted not having enough free time pointed to simple activities, which they said they would like to have time for. Leah’s words, “just sitting” and the fact that Alon considers it funny, saying “don’t laugh,” seem to suggest that for the participants themselves, the mundaneness of the examples they provide is somewhat surprising. Struggling for a definition of free time, Yardena, 52-year-old primary school teacher, defines it by indicating what it is not, followed by an activity that exemplifies what it is. She says, “Not housework (laughs). Definitely not. Reading a book, yes. Absolutely. Reading.” For Yardena, reading is contrasted to the commitments to duties such as housework, suggesting a conception of free time as freedom from and freedom to when one is both free from constraints as well as being free to pursue activities of one’s choice. Eran, places the emphasis on personal time, and the freedom to be able “To sit, to think. To read a book, really to do private things,” suggesting that the self is central to his conception of free time. We see that, when searching for a way to define free time, the illustrations given, were ordinary, everyday activities. Interestingly, these simple pastimes are also quiet activities that are performed individually, allowing the person time to her/himself. The duality of being free from others on the one hand, as well as the appeal of having time for oneself, was apparent in the examples provided by participants to illustrate their understanding of free time. In this way, the concrete examples reinforce the more abstract definitions of free time as freedom from and freedom to.

Discussion In this chapter, I have looked at participants’ conceptions of free time, focusing on what characterizes free time as such. These definitions present a positive notion of free time and one indicating freedom as central.

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While, following Fromm (1942/1984), I have suggested a distinction between freedom from and freedom to, relating to the second as more positive, both concepts of freedom are, nevertheless, conceived by participants as being central to the appeal of free time. In other words, as I have said, freedom from may imply a negative idea of free time in the sense that it is defined by what it is not, namely, time committed to duties. Yet this is not to say that it is considered negative. On the contrary, the contrast between committed time and free time may elevate the perceived value of free time, making it all the more attractive and desired. Therefore, the above examination of subjective sources of pressure both at work and in the home is crucial to our understanding of the individual’s need for free time. This is particularly relevant in view of the large body of research, as well as popular culture, that relates to overwork, busyness and time famine, as discussed in Chapter 2. As we saw, the claim that in recent years there has been an increase in work hours and a decrease in free time has been contradicted by time use surveys that indicate the reverse. Given the emphasis on freedom that emerged in participants’ definitions of free time, I suggest that the feeling of time pressure suggested in research, may be linked, not to overwork or having less free time, but to a sense of constrained freedom often associated with external commitments. Yet, it may also be a consequence of a self-directed sense of obligation as was evident in the words, “Time when I don’t have to do anything for anyone and I don’t have to do for myself.” Put differently, free time is conceived as freedom from external constraints, but also being free from an inner feeling of commitment to oneself. This may account for the conception of free time as freedom to choose to be alone, to relax or to pursue pleasure, which highlights the centrality of freedom, autonomy and choice in free time practices. In this way, the definitions of free time presented in this chapter will serve as a crucial basis for better understanding the motives and meanings attached to various free time practices, but also shed light on perceptions of self that are central to free time perceptions and behaviors. Participants’ definitions of free time were found to have much in common with those used in time use and leisure research. Firstly, the notion of “in between” time resembles the treatment of free time in time use surveys, that distinguish between time at work or in the home, personal care, and free time (ATUS 2018; Gershuny 2011; OECD 2009; Robinson and Godbey 1997). Yet, the emphasis on freedom that emerged in participants’ definitions suggests that free time is not simply

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residual time or a matter of differentiating between various activities. It was indicated as being free, not only from the duties themselves, but from the sense of commitment that is experienced as a constraint on one’s personal freedom. Free time was described as a state of mind that sets it apart from other time. A I have noted in Chapter 2, Pieper (1952/2009: 46) described leisure as “not simply the result of external factors” but as “an attitude of mind, a condition of the soul.” Neulinger (1974) too, related to leisure as “a state of mind” yet he linked it to freedom saying, Leisure has one and only one essential criterion, and that is the condition of perceived freedom. Any activity carried out freely without constraint or compulsion, may be considered to be leisure. (p. 6)

Central to this conception of leisure is the liberal value of free agency, a concept proposed by Rousseau as a distinguishing quality of man (see Chapter 2). The self is at the center of this approach to leisure, evident in Neulinger’s following words that define leisure as, “being engaged in an activity as a free agent, and of one’s own choice” (Neulinger 1974: 6). Indeed, as we have seen, many leisure researchers point to freedom of choice as being a critical characteristic of free time, yet few have examined this aspect empirically. Freedom is intricately linked to the self. It is considered by Maslow (1943/1968: 383) to be a “precondition for basic need satisfactions.” This, he explains, means, “to do what one wishes.” A sense of choice is related to self- esteem, self-actualization and happiness (Sheldon and Kasser 1995; Verme 2009). Choice allows the individual to be free from external constraints, but also to be free to pursue activities that s/he chooses. Interestingly, as we saw, participants indicated simple, everyday practices or quiet time to themselves as an expression of this freedom. This conception of choice and autonomy is deeply ingrained in contemporary notions of the self. Being one’s “own master,” as one participant put it, was associated with choice, which, as Illouz (2012: 19) suggests, “is one of the most powerful cultural and institutional vectors shaping modern selfhood; it is both a right and a form of competence.” In this way, being free to choose to spend free time as one wishes is seen as more than a matter of entitlement. It may also be a reflection of one’s self. This is where freedom from and freedom to may intersect. I suggest that a sense of obligation to others, be it at work or in the home,

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is conceived as a hindrance to one’s freedom all the more so, given the emphasis on the self in our culture. Free time was described as a time to relax and escape the pressures of day-to-day obligations as well as an opportunity to devote time to the self. This conception of free time emphasizes a positive freedom that Fromm (1942/1984: 228) associates with “the growth and realization of man’s individuality” and which implies “that man is the center and purpose of his life.” Thus, freedom from constraints, whether social or economic, allows the individual to fulfill inner needs and thus embrace freedom. Yet, as Fromm suggests people may “escape” freedom by changing their ideal self in order to conform to cultural scripts of the self. Perhaps this may be true of free time practices which, though they are linked to the notion of individual freedom, may not be as free as the above definitions seem to imply. In the following chapters, I continue to explore the question of freedom as I examine participants’ experience and conceptions of free time. Yet, before that, the next chapter will present the quantitative findings in order to see how participants spent their free time. After we get a general picture of their free time practices, the subsequent chapters will delve into subjective meanings attached to free time activities, as well as exploring the various kinds of self that emerged as intricately linked to conceptions and practices of free time.

References American Time Use Survey (ATUS). 2018. American Time Use Survey— Overview. Bureau of Labor Statistics. https://www.bls.gov/tus/overview. htm#2. Accessed Aug 2018. Fromm, Erich. [1942] 1984. The Fear of Freedom. London: Ark. Gershuny, Jonathan. 2011. Time-Use Surveys and the Measurement of National Well-Being. Centre for Time-Use Research, Department of Sociology, University of Oxford. Illouz, Eva. 2012. Why Love Hurts: A Sociological Explanation. Cambridge: Polity Press. Maslow, Abraham Harold. [1943] 1968. Toward a Psychology of Being. Oxford, England: D. Van Nostrand. Neulinger, John. 1974. The Psychology of Leisure: Research Approaches to the Study of Leisure. Springfield, IL: Springfield Publisher. OECD Social Indicators. 2009. Special Focus: Measuring Leisure in OECD Countries. http://www.oecd.org/berlin/42675407.pdf. Accessed July 2013.

94  M. SHIR-WISE Pieper, Josef. [1952] 2009. Leisure: The Basis of Culture. San Francisco: Ignatius Press. Robinson, John P., and Geoffrey Godbey. 1997. Time for Life: The Surprising Ways Americans Use Their Time. University Park: Pennsylvania State University Press. Rojek, Chris. 2010. The Labour of Leisure: The Culture of Free Time. Los Angeles: Sage. Sheldon, Kennon M., and Tim Kasser. 1995. Coherence and Congruence: Two Aspects of Personality Integration. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology 68 (3): 531–543. Stebbins, Robert A. 2001. Serious Leisure. Society 38 (4): 53–57. Verme, Paolo. 2009. Happiness, Freedom and Control. Journal of Economic Behavior & Organization 71 (2): 146–161.

CHAPTER 5

Quantitative Mapping and Subjective Mapping: Free Time in Practice

Quantitative Mapping: What, Where, When and with Whom? While the main body of this study concentrates on the meaning and experience of free time, the first part of this chapter focuses on numbers. In other words, before we look into motives, meanings and evaluations of free time, I present figures concerning the nature, frequency and time spent on various activities so that the reader may get a more complete picture of participants’ daily routine and lifestyle. The findings I p ­ resent here are based on questionnaires that participants of the study were asked to complete before the oral interview (see Appendix A for details about the questionnaires). Habitual Practices The popular regular activities reported by participants of the study, as we see in Table 5.1, are probably not unlike those which occupy the free time of the readers of this book. In this respect, the sample of the study is not unusual or exotic, but fairly typical of contemporary suburban life. It is not at all surprising, then, that computer use, television viewing, reading, music, and sport were found to be the most popular regular activities. The popularity of the pastime was indicated by the high percentages of participants who reported having done them in the month or 48 hours preceding the completion of the questionnaire. © The Author(s) 2019 M. Shir-Wise, Time, Freedom and the Self, Leisure Studies in a Global Era, https://doi.org/10.1007/978-3-030-13841-7_5

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96  M. SHIR-WISE Table 5.1  Regular free time activities Activity Computer Watching TV Reading Musica Sport (all) aIncluding

Done in the last month (%)

Done in the last 48 hours (%)

100 97.3 84 75.7 70.2

97.3 83.8 67.6 62.6 45.9

listening while doing something else

Media Time Media use was found to dominate free time with television viewing being both a popular and time-consuming pastime. Besides one participant who did not own a television, all others reported watching TV in their free time in the month preceding the interview. Due to the increase in the use of computers and smartphones, many people believe that television viewing is now becoming less popular than in the past. Yet, surprisingly, the findings of the study indicate it as one of the most popular pastimes. I say, surprisingly, not because it contradicts time use research that also points to the continued popularity of television viewing, but rather because of the misconception I have noted regarding the supposed decrease in television viewing. Indeed, this finding is in keeping with statistics worldwide (ATUS 2017; Statista 2016). As we see in Table 5.2, television viewing takes up a large amount of time. The longest average time was spent watching movies (1 hour, 51 minutes), yet reality shows were reported to have been watched by double the number of people in the previous 48 hours and as having been viewed more frequently. In other words, the total amount of time spent watching reality TV was particularly high. Almost 60% of partici­ pants reported having watched the news in the 48 hours before the interview and close to a third had watched reality and/or drama shows in that time. It is important to note that all participants reported having watched a number of different programs which means that the sum total of viewing time was much greater than the time spent watching each program. Rojek (1985) suggests that the private domain is a major site for free time, due to the privatization of entertainment in the form of media technology. Home cinema systems, access to movies and television series through the Internet, and cable television, have made media entertainment readily accessible.

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Table 5.2  Free time media use and reading with subcategories Activity

Average time spent per day when done

Watching TV Reality News Comedy Drama/series Sport Movies Documentaries Computer email Facebook Movies/series YouTube Reading (all) Excluding newspapers Fiction Newspapers Non-fiction a1—sometimes;

1 hour 21 minutes 45 minutes 1 hour 1 minutes 59 minutes 1 hour 10 minutes 1 hour 51 minutes 54 minutes 51 minutes 38 minutes 1 hour 15 minutes 17 minutes

1 hour 3 minutes 48 minutes 55 minutes

Done in the last month (%)

How often?a 1–4 Done in the last (median) 48 hours (%)

97.3 54

3

83.8 32.4

89.2 51.3

3 3

59.5 13.5

54 32.4

3 3

32.4 18.9

48.6

2

16.2

45.9 100 89.1 32.4 21.6

2

13.5 97.3 86.5 27 13.5

29.7 84.2 73

1

5.4 67.6 43.2

64.8

3

24.3

62.1 32.4

4 3

40.5 16.2

4 3 3

2—once or twice a month; 3—once or twice a week; 4—every day

Indeed, computers were used by almost a quarter of participants for viewing movies and TV series in addition to regular TV viewing. Regarding the use of computers, the questionnaire specified free time use only and excluded work associated use. As we see in Table 5.2, the most common and frequent (daily) activity on the computer was electronic mail, with 86.5% having used the computer for this purpose in the 48 hours preceding the interview. Facebook, too, was reported as a regular activity done once or twice a week both on computers and on cellphones. I do not present numbers regarding cellphones since it is difficult

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to measure the time spent using them. Firstly, their use is intermittent. Also, cellphones are often a secondary activity, thus it is more difficult to quantify the time spent using them, as compared to activities that are done in blocks of time. Nevertheless, as we shall see in Chapter 7, “The Consuming Self,” the use of cellphones was found to be significant, particularly as an in-between activity. Reading, Sport, and Music Besides media, an interesting finding was the popularity of reading, which was ranked third as we see in Table 5.1. The high percentage is highlighted by the fact that, in contrast to other activities such as media use or listening to music, reading is considered a primary activity since it is generally not accompanied by another (Robinson and Godbey 1997: 125). Eighty-four percent reported some kind of reading during the month preceding the interview and 67.6% in the 48 hours before. In addition, time spent on reading was found to be relatively long. For instance, an average of 1 hour and 3 minutes (Table 5.2), a duration similar to that of viewing TV comedies, was spent on reading fiction per day when done, and this was reported as an activity performed once or twice a week. Also, many participants reported more than one type of reading. This tendency toward reading may be due to the high level of education of the participants, with 86.4% of them having academic degrees. Sport and music were also found to be popular activities, though music was mostly reported as a secondary activity, done simultaneously with another. While music was reported by 75.7% of participants as an activity done in the month preceding the interview, Table 5.3 shows that 60.5% defined it as a hobby. The percentage that reported having done sport in the month before the interview was particularly high (70.2%) considering that, unlike music, it requires active participation. Almost half reported having performed a sports activity in the 48 hours before. Sport, too, had a lower percentage in the hobbies category, since some listed it in the health section. Moreover, 42% participated in regular sports classes, which were reported almost exclusively by women. This means that for them, sport involved some form of social interaction. It is interesting to note that when asked about the main reason for doing sport, 83% reported health, rather than pleasure or looks, an issue I shall devote further attention to in the coming chapters. An additional hobby reported by almost a third of participants was cooking, yet, surprisingly, double the number of men

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Table 5.3  Hobbies and enrichment classes/sessions Hobby

Percentage of participants Percentage of women (%) Percentage of men (%) (%)

Reading Sporta Musicb Cooking Studies class Sports class Music class aDefined

84.2 44.7 60.5 31.5 36.8 42.1 23.7

47.4 23.7 31.6 10.5 28.9 39.5 15.8

36.8 21 28.9 21 7.9 2.6 7.9

as a hobby and playing an instrument

bListening

Table 5.4  Personal care How often?a Percentage in last month (%)

Activity Clothes shopping Hairdresser/ barber Cosmetics/aftershave/creams shopping Beauty care a1—sometimes;

Percentage of women (%)

Percentage of men (%)

1 1

67.6 67.6

44.7 40.5

22.9 27.1

1

43.2

35.3

7.9

2

37.8

35.2

2.6

2—once or twice a month; 3—once or twice a week; 4—every day

to women defined it as such. Perhaps men perceived cooking as a free time activity, whereas women may have considered it to be a daily duty. In Table 5.4, the section relating to personal care, we see that more than two-thirds of participants had shopped for clothes in the month before the interview, the same number had been to the hairdresser and 43.2% had shopped for cosmetics, aftershaves, etc. Beauty care was listed by 37.8% as a regular activity done once or twice a month, and only one man reported beauty care. The gender difference was also evident in the shopping categories with more women than men reporting clothes shopping or shopping for cosmetics, creams or similar products. Although personal care or shopping may not generally be categorized as free time activities, I included these in the questionnaire since they are “free” in so

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far as they are not part of committed time such as paid or unpaid work. For this reason, I did not include supermarket shopping. Additionally, since a major concern of the study is selfhood, I considered it important to ask about activities that are linked to the self. Family Time Although much of the literature points to less time with family and more time pressure (Bianchi et al. 2006; Jacobs and Gerson 2004; Parker and Livingston 2017), family emerged as an integral part of free time. The participants of the study reported spending lengthy periods of free time with children and partners on a regular basis as illustrated in Table 5.5. Free time was reported to be spent with spouses every day while, with children, it averaged once or twice a week, as fathers reported spending time with their children less frequently. In addition, a smaller amount of free time, 1 hour and 40 minutes, was spent with children as opposed to spouses, which averaged almost 3 hours. Romance and intimacy (Table 5.6) accounted for 1 hour and 12 minutes of the time with spouses, reported as once or twice a week. This category was intended to differentiate routine time that may include the practicalities of everyday life, from time that is experienced as more couple oriented.

Table 5.5  Free time with others and alone Others/alone Percentage in Average time last month (%) spent per day when done Children

88.8

Spouse Friends

88.6 72.7

Parents Siblings

69.9 62.8

Alone

57.2

a1—sometimes;

1 hour, 40 minutes 3 hours 2 hours, 20 minutes 2 hours 2 hours, 8 minutes 1 hour, 36 minutes

How often?a Percentage of women (%)

Percentage of men (%)

3

44.4

44.4

4 2

48.6 45.7

40 27

2 2

42.9 37.1

27 25.7

3

34.3

22.9

2—once or twice a month; 3—once or twice a week; 4—every day

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As well as spending free time with immediate family, 69.9% also spent time with parents and 62.2% with siblings, though less frequently. Surprisingly, little difference was found by gender regarding free time spent with immediate family. This is not to say that men and women necessarily spend the same amount of total time with children. Since the data of this study related to free time only, it is possible that, as recent research has shown, mothers spend more committed time with children than fathers (ATUS 2017; Gracia and Esping-Andersen 2015; OECD 2016; Parker and Livingston 2017), even if the amount of free time spent with children is similar. Also, while fathers spent free time with children less frequently, when they did, it was for a longer duration. Regarding the category of spending free time alone, only 24.3% reported having time to themselves every day while 40.5% had time alone at least once a week. As we see in Table 5.6, media activities, which dominate free time, are not necessarily done alone. Watching TV was indicated by 73.7% as an activity done in the company of others for an average of 1 hour, 20 minutes per day when done. Even computer use, often considered an individual activity, was reported by more than a third of participants to be done with others. Since these pastimes are usually done in the home, it is likely that they are shared with family. Social Time Not only was family found to be an essential component of free time, but also friends were indicated as central to certain activities. Socializing was widely reported as regular and involving a significant amount of time. This included, inviting friends, going to friends and going out. Additionally, eating in restaurants or cafes, while not specified in the questionnaires as having been done with others, is also likely to be a social outing on many occasions, as the qualitative findings will confirm. Table 5.6 shows that 81.5% had hosted friends in the month preceding the interview and this was considered a regular activity, done once or twice a month. Furthermore, a great deal of time, 2 hours and 48 minutes, was spent on the activity. The numbers and time spent going with friends was almost as high. Particularly surprising, in an era of supposed isolation, was the amount of time spent talking to others both on the phone (51 minutes) as well as face-to-face (1 hour 11 minutes). It is important to note that this came under the category of spending free

102  M. SHIR-WISE Table 5.6  Types of activities with others Type of activity

Average time spent per day when done

Percentage in last month (%)

Inviting friends

2 hours, 48 minutes Romance/ 1 hour, intimacy 12 minutes Going to friends 2 hours, 41 minutes Watching TV 1 hour, 20 minutes Phone 51 minutes conversations Face-to-face 1 hour, conversations 11 minutes Volunteering 2 hours, 15 minutes Computer 1 hour, 13 minutes Games 1 hour, 47 minutes

Percentage of women (%)

Percentage of men (%)

81.5

47.3

34.2

81.5

47.3

34.2

73.7

39.5

34.2

73.7

47.3

26.3

68.4

44.7

23.7

57.9

42.1

15.8

34.2

18.4

15.8

34.2

18.4

15.8

18.9

7.9

11

Table 5.7 Outings Venue

Average time spent per day when done

How often?a Percentage in last month (%)

Restaurant, cafes Nature/trips Movies Concerts Malls

1 hour, 57 minutes 5 hours, 43 minutes 2 hours, 28 minutes 2 hours, 7 minutes 1 hour, 50 minutes

2 1–2 1 1 1

a1—sometimes;

83.8 67.6 45.9 45.9 40.5

2—once or twice a month; 3—once or twice a week; 4—every day

time with others. That is to say that this interaction did not describe conversations concerning duties, work or other practical tasks. In addition, a high percentage, as shown in Table 5.7, reported outings, most of which are likely to be done in the company of others. For example, 83.8% of participants reported having gone to restaurants or cafes in the month preceding the interview. This too, was considered

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to be a regular activity done once or twice a month. Another activity, though not necessarily a form of socializing, yet still involving social interaction, was volunteering (Table 5.5). Findings indicate that a more than a third of participants spent a large amount of time (2 and a quarter hours) on this activity. It was reported as being done once or twice a month, suggesting communal involvement and a collective sense of responsibility. This may be partly explained by the socio-economic class of the participants in the study since higher income and ­education have been found to predict participation in volunteering (CBS 2014; Smith 1994; Wilson and Musick 1997). Perhaps, the fact that most participants were middle aged with older children, may also contribute to higher rates of participation in volunteering as other free time practices. Taking part in various types of enrichment classes also incorporates some form of social interaction. While the participation of women in free time activities was higher than men in general, those involving social interaction were significantly higher. Differences may be partly explained by the fact that slightly more male participants worked full time, yet the gap was particularly large regarding participation in sports and study classes, conversations, the use of Facebook and email and going out to movies. Even when one is not physically in the company of friends, social communication exists in the form of virtual socializing on Facebook, email or texting. So, while electronic communication may be criticized as a medium with ensuing negative effects, it must, nevertheless be acknowledged as a means to interact with others. By facilitating communication, Internet technology has been said to strengthen social ties as well as forging new relationships (Bargh and McKenna 2004; Hampton and Wellman 2001). The above findings suggest a wide range of free time practices among participants of the study. Some were performed in the private domain while others were done in the public domain. Certain practices were found to be more social than others and a number of activities were more popular among women. However, these findings do not relate to subjective meanings attached to activities. The second part of this chapter and those that follow are intended to do just that—uncover ­ meaning behind the numbers and shed light on the individual’s interpretations, motives, and experience of free time.

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Subjective Mapping: The Hierarchization of Free Time In the previous section, we saw how participants of the study understood and defined the concept of free time, and above we saw how they spent that time. Here, I focus on the experience and evaluation of free time practices, exploring pastimes that are experienced favorably or considered worthwhile. What makes people choose some free time activities rather than others? Which are considered worthy and what determines whether they are positively valued? In what way are they linked to the self? How do participants envisage the ultimate way to spend free time? To what extent do free time practices reflect participants’ conceptual definitions of free time? Whereas the quantitative findings revealed types of free time activities, their frequency and the amount of time spent doing them, the qualitative findings allow a deeper understanding of the experience of free time among participants. As we have seen, participants reported a variety of free time practices, including everyday activities done in the home, such as media use or reading, as well as outings to restaurants or malls. Some pastimes were solitary while others were social. Since the questionnaire related to activities performed in the month or 48 hours preceding the interview, certain free time pursuits, such as vacations, were not included in the quantitative findings, yet they emerged during the oral interview. But more importantly, while the previous section provides us with quantitative data this part focuses on the subjective experience of free time, namely how participants feel about what they do. Whether we consider our free time to be scarce or ample, we all have our preferred or favorite pastimes, as well as having fantasies about what we would like to do if…. if we had more free time, if we had more money or if we had time for ourselves. In other words, we hierarchize our free time as we categorize it into scales of worth. This part is concerned precisely with, what I have called, the hierarchization of free time. The concept refers to the ways in which individuals envisage and categorize their free time according to the perceived worth of an activity. Thus, rather than presenting a random list of activities, I offer a typological presentation according to scales of worth. By examining how participants talk about their pastimes, I hope to better understand why certain activities are classified as positive and what accounts for a higher or lower ranking of pastimes on the hierarchy of free time. In order to explore the hierarchies of worth concerning free time, besides focusing on participants’ positive

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descriptions of various activities, I asked them about their favorite pastimes as well as asking about imagined free time. I begin by presenting activities described as relaxation and pleasure, linking these classifications with participants’ conceptions of free time as discussed in Chapter 4. I then look at what participants consider to be their favorite pastime. Finally, in order to uncover what is conceived as a desirable way to spend free time, I explore responses to hypothetical questions relating to potential, imagined free time. Relaxation: Freedom From Participants’ indications of positive experiences echoed their definitions of free time, which centered around freedom. As we saw, free time was defined, as freedom from obligations and routine, being described as an escape from external constraints related to work and domestic duties, and conceived as a means of release from stress associated with these commitments. Indeed, a prominent category that emerged in relation to this conception of freedom was relaxation. Many free time activities, ranging from everyday practices such as walking, reading or watching television, to nature trips and vacations, were described as relaxation, which was indicated as both a motive and result of these practices. Pure Free Time Relaxing time was conceived as pure, uninterrupted and unfragmented, since it is free from external interferences. When uncontaminated by constraints, it is experienced as pleasure. For example, Leah, mother of 4 young children, referred to watching television as enjoyable, when done “without washing and folding.” Ofrah, mother of two teenagers, talks about watching a series or reading books, saying, “I do it for my fun for my pleasure, without anything much standing over me.” These quotes suggest that an essential criterion for enjoyment is that the time is uninterrupted. The individual is able to pursue activities directed toward the self, rather than others. As we have seen, television viewing was indicated as one of the most popular and time-consuming practices reported by participants. The question is: what is the appeal of this pastime as an everyday activity? Perhaps a key to understanding the attraction is its association with relaxation. Eden, mother of 5 who, during the interview talks of the difficulties of juggling work and domestic duties, refers to television viewing as

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“a kind of moment of relaxation.” In Chapter 7, we will see that many participants described it as relaxing. However, we will also learn that, at the same time, television viewing was negatively valued, and considered a waste of time. Because of the contradictory nature of descriptions related to media practices, and, since these were indicated as regular and time-consuming, I devote an entire chapter to the investigation of free time media use, including television viewing. Nevertheless, since it emerged as a pastime widely associated with relaxation, it was important to mention it at this point. We have said that being free from interruptions or external constraints may bring about a sense of relaxation, yet given the feelings of pressure linked to the private domain as we saw in the previous chapter, it is interesting that many of the activities experienced as relaxing, are performed in the home. The home surroundings, it seems, may actually contribute to the sense of relaxation expressed by participants. Yehudit says, “if I can be at home, either read a book or watch some program, relaxed in comfortable clothes, you know, in comfy home clothes, you don’t need more than that.” The comfort and familiarity of being in one’s home may be what brings about a sense of repose. The fact that she is able to spend this time on self-oriented activities may add to her sense of relaxation since the time is not contaminated by external interferences. Sarit, mother of 5, describes her day off from work, saying, “I like the quiet, computer, reading—it’s really a quiet time. Doing a puzzle—it’s a relaxing time.” Perhaps having quiet time to oneself is experienced as an escape from the busyness of committed time. Others linked music with a sense of freedom. For example, Maurice says playing piano makes him feel free, while Alon says he feels free when “alone at home listening to music.” For Alon, this activity is linked to a sense of freedom and being alone is as an essential part of the experience, perhaps implying a feeling of being free to do as one pleases but also being free from the presence of others who may be perceived as interfering with this sense of freedom. Yet, being alone was not necessarily a prerequisite for relaxation. For many, weekends spent with the family were seen as a break from the stress of day-to-day routines. Amos, 32, who describes himself as experiencing time pressure due to the demanding role of being father to a 6-year-old girl and 18-month-old twins, talks about weekends differently. He says, “the atmosphere is much quieter and more relaxed…caressing.” While he does not specify activities done in that time, it seems that the change of

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pace and the break from everyday busyness contribute to the feeling of relaxation. It seems that the weekend allows him to be free from having to balance work commitments with childcare as he must do during the week. Similarly, Debra describes Fridays as, “a day of relaxation,” explaining that, “there’s a kind of feeling of getting rid of tension.” The contrast between “relaxation” and “tension” accentuates her sense of escape from the rushed activity and stress of day-to-day duties. This was evident, particularly among religious participants, who indicated Shabbat1 as a complete change from the routine of weekdays. Yaffa is a teacher and mother of 5. She says, “Shabbat is rest, it’s fun (smiles). It’s really enjoyable. It’s relaxed. It’s getting up in the morning, chatting with the kids.” Like Amos, Yaffa indicates the slower tempo and easygoing atmosphere as contributing to a sense of relaxation. She implies a dual quality of the day. Not only is it experienced as a day of relaxation and “rest,” but also as “fun” and “enjoyable.” For other religious participants, the abstention from the use of electronic devices on Shabbat is perceived as allowing freedom from the constant dependence on them. For example, Oren describes the onset of the Shabbat saying, “everything calms down.” He explains that, “Shabbat is different, there are no e-mails, no television, excellent.” The constant availability enabled by electronic devices is seen as a burden which is lifted, thus creating a more relaxed atmosphere in the home. Similarly Erez, father of 4, describes the day as an escape from technology explaining, “we need something at our fingertips all the time. But this Shabbat, 24 hours, you don’t hear anything, you don’t see anything.” Erez implies that it is not only a break from the addiction to the devices but also an escape from exposure to external sources of possible stress. Clearly, it is not necessarily the nature of a certain activity that generates feelings of relaxation, but also the absence of an activity that allows one to let go, as Pieper (2009/1952) proposed. In other words, the quality of that time is transformed by the absence of activities, particularly those that are experienced as a burden. For many participants going to nature was associated with relaxation and freedom. When describing such trips, Maddy says, “There is something just relaxing about it, very relaxing.” Other participants, like Neta, were more specific saying, “I love the country, nature, views, the atmosphere. I loathe the mall. When you send me to the mall, I suffer in the mall. In nature I feel my freedom.” She contrasts the sense of release she feels in nature with her intense dislike of malls. The first is presented as open, peaceful and visually pleasing while the second is implied as the

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antithesis. This comparison highlights the sense of freedom Neta experiences in nature. Indeed, the exposure to nature as opposed to urban settings has been found to reduce stress (Hartig et al. 2003; Lohr 2007). Sarit, too, tries to explain what she likes about trips to nature. She says, I like the views, I like the flowers. I like the walking and the… it’s sort of…here, at home and in the computer age when each person is cut off from everything, so once you go with this person and another time you go with that. Also on trips with friends I like the interaction and the talking and the actual walking I like.

For Sarit, like Neta, nature is experienced as a break from urbanized routines. She juxtaposes the isolation of the individual, confinement, and inactivity associated with modern technology with the social interaction and physical movement that contribute to the pleasure in such trips. For her, not only the surroundings, but also the company of friends makes the experience enjoyable. I shall go into a deeper discussion about the significance of social interaction in the chapter on The Sociable Self. Some participants specified beaches as having a calming effect, as Erez says, “Seeing the beach relaxes me.” Beach vacations, in particular were presented as a relaxing break from the clangor of everyday life. Alon says, “The ultimate holiday for me…sitting on the beach, nothing commercialized and no noise around. Just you and nature actually.” He later describes it as his “great love,” indicating “the serenity” as central. As with Neta, the mention of commercialized options and the noise associated with them heightens the sense of serenity he describes. The feeling of oneness with nature that he describes evokes a special quality of the experience which is central to its positive evaluation. “Switching Off” on Vacation More than any other free time practice besides television viewing, which I shall explore in the chapter on media use (Chapter 7, “The Consuming Self ”), going on vacation was associated with escape. Derivations of the word nituk in Hebrew were used when talking about vacations. The noun literally means cutting off or separating, yet it is used colloquially to imply escape or switching off. As Ilana says about vacations, “Going on holidays without kids is the only time when it makes me switch off.” For her, vacations are perceived as a chance to escape the demands of childcare.

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Others described it as a break from work and the stress associated with it. Yaron says, “vacations clear the head, that is that I’m not …the phone is not for work and I don’t sit in front of the computer and answering the phone.” The appeal of vacations for Yaron is not only in the physical escape from work, but also the resulting mental freedom. For some, being able to switch off is described as a process that takes time. Efrat says, Let’s say vacations, it takes me a day or two till I get into it… I manage to switch off but it takes me a process of transition to switch off. Like when I switch off from my everyday surroundings, I manage…

While she does not explicitly refer to tension, the repeated use of the words “switch off,” implies a feeling of stress that pervades her dayto-day surroundings, from which it is difficult to free herself. In this way, vacations allow a complete escape, though the transition may take time. Since vacations allow an “unbroken chunk of leisure time” as well as having a different quality (Richards 1998: 145), they are more likely to generate a fuller sense of release than shorter free time practices. For Manny, vacations allow an escape from the stress of everyday life in Israel. He says, “I like seeing different places and also the switching off, the escape from Israel. Even though I’m not a news freak like some people, it affects you.” The exposure to daily news is experienced as a negative influence that can be escaped. But it also means a change of atmosphere and seeing “different places,” which may heighten one’s sense of distance from the source of tension. Manny implies that it is not only work or domestic commitments that create pressure, but also the day-to-day reality of living in Israel. Being overseas disconnects a person both mentally and physically allowing transformation to one’s very being. As Alon says simply, “When I’m overseas, I’m another person.” Similarly, Yaffa is aware of the negative implications of stress, whether brought on by micro or macro factors. She explains, When we go on holidays it’s relaxed, without any pressure. That relaxation, getting up to go on a trip every day…look the day-to-day has its tension… things to do with the country, things to do with the home … and it gives you a lot of strength, in my opinion for the rest of the year.

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The escape from day-to-day pressure, particularly when alone with her husband, is experienced, as relaxing as well as being a means of regeneration. Like Manny, Yaffa is aware of the tension associated with the reality of living in Israel but the pressures of domestic life are also acknowledged. The escape from both is experienced as revitalizing. While vacations were also indicated as quality time with children, as we shall see in the chapter on The Family Self, when linked to relaxation, participants referred to vacations without children. Maddy differentiates between the two, saying, I like, when I am with my kids I like active holidays. I like to make sure everyday we are doing something, trips or just fun things to really make it a full holiday. When I go with my husband, I like more of a laid back relaxing holiday, you know watch movies, go for walks, you know also, like to go out to eat or things. Like that they are more laid back.

Whereas vacations with her children must be “active” and “full,” when she goes with her husband, Maddy prefers a more relaxed style, which was implied to be more self-directed than family holidays. This emphasis on relaxation emerged among many participants of the study. Alon associates vacations without children with “massages and quiet,” while Pam includes nature saying, …in a zimmer, with pampering, I say pampering it’s massages and… Jacuzzi, and walking in nature. Nature is fun. It’s something that suits both of us, really. The relaxation.

The feeling of physical release enabled by a massage, together with the escape from everyday routine by being in nature, is experienced as relaxation, but also as a way to indulge the self. Pleasure: Freedom To Indeed, devoting time to the self was found to be central to the idea of pleasure, associated with freedom to pursue a wide range of practices, many of which were everyday activities. Certain pastimes were envisaged as having a set goal while some were experienced as enjoyable in themselves.

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Filled Time Investing time, effort or money was found to be central to many activities that were described as pleasurable. Rather than being a passive way of passing the time, such practices were perceived as actively filling time as participants indicated activities involving physical effort or planning. Many were goal-oriented as they were linked to perceived results. Sport, in particular, which was found to be a popular pastime, was described in terms of its benefits. For example, Neta says, “I enjoy sport. I like to challenge my body. Yes, because I like eating, I’m not exactly thin. I like eating and I like sport.” Neta indicates sport as a source of pleasure, yet it becomes clear that it is perceived as productive since it is used as a means for self-management. Her words suggest that a central goal for doing sport is to watch her weight. Perhaps then, challenging her body is experienced as enjoyable as it gives her a sense of control due to the perceived outcome of the activity. Similarly, Dana says she enjoys sport pointing to its physical and psychological effects. Sport today is only for pleasure. I have in my head the knowledge of the benefits and that it’s maintenance of my body and …again what it does to my soul. But it’s only pleasure today. I know that’s rare with women but that’s how it is with me.

While she acknowledges the effect of sport on her body, she points to pleasure as being the sole motive for her doing it. This, she believes, is in contrast to other women, implying that for them, body shaping is their main goal. Dana is aware that the benefits of sport may subconsciously motivate her, yet her repetition of the words “only for pleasure,” and the fact that she presents herself as being unlike other women, seem to imply that she prefers to see her engagement in sport as a matter of choice rather than obligation. Sport is thus experienced as enjoyable in itself, while also being associated with goals and results. For Zack, doing sport is perceived as having positive effects, not only on himself but also on his surroundings. Besides the physical health aspect, he says it makes him “feel good.” He explains that he is, therefore in a better mood, which, in turn has a positive influence on his family. The fact that it is goal-oriented does not necessarily detract from the sense of pleasure. On the contrary, it seems that a feeling of filling the time with a productive activity may heighten the enjoyment, even if it requires hard work as we see in the following.

112  M. SHIR-WISE I play soccer once a week on Friday and that’s something that I don’t miss…really love it, yes. I’m addicted to it… First of all, it’s pleasure, secondly, I really like using my body. I really like coming back tired. I like that feeling when I feel my muscles, and feel that I did something. I feel that my body gets cleansed… I really like that feeling…it hurts, ok…I like to feel that my body has worked.

Rather than being perceived as a way to simply pass the time, sport was experienced as a positive way to fill the time. By putting effort into an activity, the individual feels active, perhaps enhancing her/his sense of agency. In addition, as we shall see in the next chapter, although sport is experienced as hard work, with aching muscles presented as evidence of the effort, it is still perceived as a matter of choice and as having desirable results. Sport was not the only practice that was associated with benefits. A variety of activities described as enjoyable were linked to well-being, intellectual development, and spiritual enrichment. Efrat, who is studying for her Ph.D. indicates self-development as a central motive. She says, Fun is also studies. Look, overall I am not suffering from it, but the choice, that I chose to study, continue studying. I have a goal but I think that the process is what gives me a certain pleasure. It’s also, you feel you are developing, you’re learning, there’s something about the learning process.

The fact that she says that “overall” she is not suffering, implies that the studies do include difficult periods that are experienced negatively. Here, as in the above, perhaps the challenge is what contributes to a sense of pleasure as the individual may feel empowered by setting high goals and overcoming difficult tasks. Furthermore, since her studies are perceived as choice, this is likely to heighten her sense of freedom, which may, in turn, associate the activity with pleasure. In addition, she points to the “process” itself as a source of pleasure. Autotelic Enjoyment Other pastimes were perceived in this way, however, not necessarily presented as goal-oriented. On the contrary, while thought to be beneficial for the individual, they emerged as autotelic, being pleasurable in themselves. In other words, while positive outcomes were acknowledged,

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these were not presented as the motive for pursuing the activity. For example, one participant said, “I really love cooking. For me it’s therapy.” Another described working in the garden as “therapy” and “freedom.” For Yardena, doing Sudoku puzzles was considered a “challenge” that “develops thinking.” The benefit was implied as a by-product rather than the aim of the activity. Certain activities described as pleasure were presented as satisfying a need. Maddy talks about going to a weekly lesson with the Rabbi saying, “I enjoy it. I feel like they give me, fill my batteries for the week.” Her use of the battery metaphor suggests that these lessons are perceived as a source of spiritual energy that needs regular recharging. For Liron, reading philosophy is described as a pleasure that is rooted in an inherent need that must be satisfied. I really enjoy reading…enriching my knowledge and… for me the thing of filling a lacking that I have in my world outlook is a great pleasure. Like there are some who have a need for sport or for music, that’s what I need. I fill it with reading, doing, all sorts of things of that kind. Going to the beach, like… meditation…

In Liron’s view, reading is seen as a means of enriching one’s knowledge, while also being experienced as pleasure. Through his comparison to other free time practices, he accentuates the fact that while reading is conceived as filling a need, it is still considered to be a “great pleasure.” It is interesting that he refers to going to the beach and meditation as similar to reading, which may imply that these activities are also experienced as enjoyable yet having added value. Pleasure from free time activities was not only linked to perceived benefits or satisfying needs, but also described as being enjoyed for their own sake. Participants related to hobbies that were experienced as creative. Rona says, “I love writing. I write poems and short stories.” Yasmin, who enjoys cooking describes it as “a kind of creation,” while Madlyn says doing puzzles gives her pleasure. She says, “even when it’s hard and I do it, I enjoy putting it together.” For Madlyn, the effort invested in the activity and the challenge involved, add to the pleasure derived from this pastime. In this way, as we have seen above, the difficulty of the task, rather than hindering enjoyment, actually magnifies it. As well as the sense of achievement associated with overcoming “hard” puzzles, Madlyn indicates the creativity of the activity as an integral part of the

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pleasure. She explains, “taking something with no form and putting it together…I enjoy.” In this way, although the autotelic quality of hobbies may contribute to pleasure, since creativity leads to visible results, such activities may be experienced as productive, and thus generate a sense of satisfaction and achievement. In other words, part of the appeal may lie in the outcome of the activity. This was evident in Debra’s description relating to photo albums, which she showed me proudly during the interview. She says, I make photo albums on the computer, of our trips overseas, I enjoy it immensely. It takes me a long, long time. It’s incredible fun, simply fun… terribly fun… I really enjoy it… It’s a lot of work but it’s fun and it’s simply such fun.

The repetition of the words “fun” and “enjoy” emphasizes the enormous pleasure derived from the activity, yet Debra stresses the time and effort involved. The fact that she asked to bring the album to show me, seems to indicate the significance of having a tangible result after the great effort invested in the activity. However, many participants indicated certain activities as a source of pleasure without indicating an outcome or a motive other than the pleasure derived from the activity. For example, Yaffa refers to a weekly lesson in Bible saying, “One of the things that I can definitely say that I do during the week that I really wait for, is Matan… it is something for my soul, it’s incredible pleasure…It’s amazing. It’s really I can say really for pleasure.” Her words convey her enthusiasm and the autotelic quality of her pleasure. Manny refers to chess as an enjoyable activity, which, he says, he can easily play for hours. This suggests that it involves deep engagement so that time passes unnoticed. Manny also describes his love of music saying, “I really, really love music and almost every type.” Reading too, which was found to be a particularly popular pastime, was described by many as a passion. Adina says simply, “I love reading. I don’t care what time I get to bed, I read for half an hour,” and Sarit says, “I love reading…I’m always with a book.” These autotelic activities were all characterized by what Csikszentmihalyi (1997) terms “flow”. Flow is a state of engagement and enjoyment that one experiences when deeply involved in an activity, often creative or requiring skills to overcome challenges. The energetic focus on the activity means the individual can lose track of time

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as Manny described when playing chess. Flow activities, such as sport, games, music, cooking or gardening, says Csikszentmihalyi, help a person grow and improve the quality of one’s life. Some of the above-mentioned activities required more effort than others. Yet, what they had in common was the fact that they were engaging as well as self-oriented. In other words, it seems that a crucial factor that may increase one’s sense of pleasure, is the feeling that one is free to invest time in the self. This may mean self-management or simply devoting time to oneself in order to enjoy activities of one’s choice, many of which, as we shall see, were unstructured, such as reading or watching television. That is to say that they were not activities that required planning or investment. Small Pleasures Indeed, many pastimes that were thought of as simple and mundane, were indicated as enjoyable. Betty says, …something that seems trivial and simple and no, it’s sitting in the house, like relaxed, coffee, drinking the coffee I like… reading on my own…It’s fun. It’s a small pleasure but it makes me feel good.

She is aware of the seemingly trivial nature of the activities that she mentions when asked about pleasure. However, she describes it as “a small pleasure” that contributes to positive feelings. Like Betty, Alon uses the words “on my own” when talking about reading the paper in bed in the evenings, saying, “the quiet, suddenly I’m on my own, sitting here.” It seems that the very fact that one is alone and thus able to devote time to oneself, contributes to feelings of pleasure. For Beth, watching various television series is considered pleasure. She says, “I really enjoy it. I really like it, really enjoy it.” Others referred to watching movies or television series on the computer as well as playing games. It is interesting that participants did not relate to television viewing in general as enjoyable, but specified watching series or particular programs. This may be associated with active decision-making in one’s choice of programs, rather than passively sitting in front of television indiscriminately, which was less positively evaluated as we shall see in subsequent chapters. While having time for oneself was found to enhance feelings of pleasure derived from many activities, this does not mean that those including

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the company of others were not considered enjoyable. Efrat differentiates between the two categories saying, I like time alone too… I don’t need people around to enjoy myself… Walking and running I do alone…I won’t go to a movie alone, to a café I won’t go and sit alone but to sit alone and read a book…I wouldn’t go on holidays on my own.

Solitary pastimes mentioned, were generally habitualized activities performed in the home, whereas outings were more often of a social nature. When relating to pleasure, participants also mentioned, though far less, outings such as going to movies, plays or restaurants. In addition, some participants indicated spending free time with children, spouses or friends. Indeed, social interactions have many of the characteristics and positive effects of flow (Csikszentmihalyi 1997). These activities will be discussed in greater detail in later chapters. Thus, participants’ experiences of pleasure reflected definitions of free time as we saw in the previous chapter. It was experienced and motivated by a need to be and feel free from external constraints. Yet it was also associated with freedom to invest in the self, whether for managing the body, intellectual or spiritual development, pursuing autotelic hobbies, or choosing to spend time with others. The Hierarchization of Free Time Favorite Free Time If someone were to ask you what your favorite free time activity is, what would you say? I imagine that many readers may find it difficult to specify one particular pastime. Indeed, many participants of the study had trouble indicating one activity. We have seen which free time activities they experienced as relaxation and pleasure. Now I focus on scales of worth and what I have called, the hierarchization of free time. By asking participants about their favorite pastime, I hoped to get a clearer picture of the experience of free time beyond pleasure. What follows is an attempt to gain a deeper understanding of meaning attached to free time as well as what may be culturally valued. Surprisingly, when asked about favorite free time activities, participants indicated pastimes that did not necessarily coincide with those

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described as pleasure or relaxation. For example, outings, such as going to a restaurant, were considered enjoyable but not mentioned as favorite pastimes. As we have seen, holidays and nature were associated with pleasure and relaxation, yet few indicated them as their favorite pastime. The most prominent difference, however, was related to television viewing. On the one hand, a large majority of participants described it as enjoyable and relaxing. On the other hand, only two considered it their favorite pastime. Another noteworthy distinction was that while pleasure was largely associated with devoting time to oneself, when talking about favorite pastimes participants placed much more emphasis on spending time with family or friends. What then, did participants consider to be their favorite pastimes? As I have said, many found it difficult to point to one specific activity as their favorite, indicating a combination of the above. For example, Daniel says, “My favorite pastime is playing soccer and spending time with my wife, they are my two favorites.” While the first is for the self, the second involves relationships. We shall see that this duality emerged among many participants as they referred to both personal and social types of free time when talking of favorite pastimes. Alon attempts to explain his choice as he differentiates between doing things for himself and spending time with his children. When asked about his favorite pastime he says, I can’t tell you, it’s everything…I can’t even explain it. Because when I go to be an umpire at soccer, I enjoy it and when I go with the kids I enjoy it. Because here it’s one kind of satisfaction, a certain type and there‘s a different kind of satisfaction. Here it’s egoistic and I’m just for myself…if you tell me to choose between them…I can’t choose.

Interestingly, he describes each as a “kind of satisfaction” suggesting that free time may fulfill individual as well as social needs. The word “egoistic,” however, has a negative connotation, that implies a higher value attached to family time2 even though he presents both as satisfying. Like Alon, Oren makes a distinction between family time and time for the self, saying, “I most enjoy going overseas with the family. Doing sport like squash, that’s for myself.” Indeed, sport and family emerged as the two most commonly mentioned favorite pastimes. For Yigal, who says daily walks with his wife are his favorite pastime, sport and family are integrated into one activity.

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Zack clarifies what he means by family time, which he indicated as his favorite time. He says, “Spending time with family is very important to me—not the committed time, but the free time.” The word “important” implies that spending time with one’s family is considered to have a moral value of its own. Yet, he stresses that it is the “free time” that is considered his favorite, and not the routine, “committed time.” In other words, being free from duties allows family time to be experienced, not only as positive, but even as one’s favorite way to spend one’s time. Leah, too, suggests that it is the free time with family that she enjoys. She says that her favorite time is having coffee with her husband in the evenings, as well as playing with her children. Yet she adds that spending time with friends is also a favorite pastime, explaining that she “really, really” enjoys sitting with her girlfriends. For others, reading was indicated as a favorite pastime. It was considered a form of personal time. Yardena says “Reading, I definitely wouldn’t miss. Computer I don’t think I would give up on. What else? Also, like being with family and girlfriends. That’s like air. It’s a need.” Here too, both individual and social time are considered favorite time, yet, while reading and computer time are presented as preferred free time activities, her words imply that social time is construed as fulfilling an inherent need. Rather than being presented as simply enjoyable, social time was presented as worthy. Ilana’s words illustrate this distinction, “Girlfriends, talking to them… reading, I really like reading, very, very much. And also swimming. But…girlfriends is really something that’s important to me.” Reading and swimming are indicated as favorite pastimes, however social interaction, like family time described by Zack, is presented as “important,” suggesting a meaningfulness that goes beyond pleasure. Indeed, a distinction between pleasure and value may account for the differences between activities that were reported as enjoyable and free time described as favorite. This implies a hierarchy of worth that ranks certain activities above others according to their perceived value rather than being determined by pleasure alone. As I shall discuss in later chapters, value may be rooted in various discourses that promote ideals such as productivity or self-work on the one hand and happiness and meaning on the other hand.

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Imagined Free Time: What Would You Do If…? In addition to asking about real-time use, I hoped to gain a deeper understanding of participants’ evaluation of free time by asking, “What would you do if you had some time for yourself?” This was designed to extract conceptions of worthy free time with an emphasis on the self rather than others. Participants’ reactions to the question were also hoped to shed light on feelings related to time pressure, which may be aroused by asking this question in the conditional form. In other words, those who felt they didn’t have enough time for themselves were expected to react more dramatically to the question. Surprisingly, rather than responding with grandiose images of leisure, participants indicated modest, everyday activities as their preferred way of spending potential free time. Some expressed a desire to spend that time quietly in the home or in nature while others envisaged using the time to pursue various interests. Many incorporated others into this time for themselves. Interestingly, a large number of the activities mentioned were strikingly similar to those that the participant reported as already doing. A common denominator of many of the activities that were mentioned was the fact that they were not linked to productivity. That is to say, they were not perceived as having specific goals or producing results. On the contrary, their appeal lay in the opportunity to do what one likes and enjoys, which correlates to participants’ conceptions of free time that we saw in the previous chapter. For Alon, having time for himself would allow him to relax in the familiar surroundings of the private domain as well as pursuing more active pastimes. He says, I like being at home with quiet and only with myself and doing all sorts of stuff that’s not connected to anything… I’d be happy to go to the pool and I’d be happy to go running…leave me at home, quiet, music and that …Yes quiet, even to sit in the garden…shanti for me it’s serenity.

The home is presented as a tranquil haven, whereas the public domain is linked to more active pursuits. Alon’s words suggest that the appeal of free time is having time to oneself, free from others and free from goals, as well as being free to pursue activities that one chooses. While Alon’s desire for “quiet” is linked to the private domain, others sought

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serenity outside the home. When asked about time for himself, Amos says he would go to the beach. He explains, “what I look for there is quiet.” Indeed, going to the beach, a half hour drive from the town, was mentioned by a number of participants in response to this question relating to time for themselves. Others referred to activities such as listening to music and reading, practices that were also associated with a sense of relaxation. For example, Adina says she would read a lot and “enjoy the quiet.” Abe envisages pursuing a combination of activities in this imagined time for himself. He says, “I would take a pile of books and a lot of music to a place with a good view and nice food.” Despite the seemingly full list, the image evoked is nevertheless one of tranquility. However, not all participants expressed a wish for quiet time. Some participants enumerated a list of activities with which they would actively fill this time. Zack, for example, mentions sport, reading and the beach, saying he has no problem finding something to do. Eli says, “pop over to the pool, a good book, activities with the kids. I would fill it.” The word “fill” suggests an efficient utilization of free time. In addition, it is interesting to note, that while participants were asked about time for yourself, many expressed a wish to spend time with others, particularly with samesex friends or with spouses. Sarit says, “I would go out with a girlfriend, I’d go sit in a café and talk. With my husband I would go out.” Whereas Sarit highlights others in her imagined time for herself, Ilana envisages a combination of quiet time, active time and social time. She says, “I would probably do a bit of swimming, meet girlfriends. Relax reading the paper, watch a bit of TV, go shopping.” On the one hand, she depicts an image of relaxation, while, at the same time, her words convey a sense of busyness and an active filling of her time. Similarly, Maddy‘s initial response to the question indicates a wish to relax by performing mundane everyday activities in the home. She says, If I had a day, let’s say I would probably, you know watch programs, have a sleep I would probably even do things like tidying the house or do like maybe even go to the supermarket or do things sort of you know at a relaxed pace without anybody interfering.

Maddy imagines being free to pursue activities of her choice, including domestic duties. The appeal of this time to herself is the fact that it is not interrupted by others and that it is not experienced as rushed time but

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rather “a relaxed pace.” Upon further consideration, however, she relates to the social opportunity for outings saying, I would want to get together with people, like go get together with friends or go out with my husband or something like that… Movie, go to a movie, go like, go to a café, go as I said into like nature, go on a picnic.

Her conception of time for herself means, being free from others, yet also being free to spend time with others and to perform activities of her choice, such as going to movies, cafes or nature. Perhaps outings are envisaged as an escape from the confinement of the home and the habitual activities associated with it. Going to nature emerged as a desirable way to spend potential time for oneself. Itai, for example, says he would, “go to the beach. Go here to some forest with coffee, a book. That’s it. Nature. Yes. It has to be nature. Not just sitting doing nothing at home. Nature, coffee, a hammock.” On the one hand, he paints a pastoral scene of relaxation. On the other hand, going to nature is presented as a form of action as he contrasts it with “just sitting doing nothing at home.” In other words, while having coffee, reading and lying on a hammock link nature with tranquility, going to nature is still perceived as a positive way of filling the time as opposed to passing the time “doing nothing.” For Denny, trips to nature assume an active quality due to their revivifying effects and the fact that he actively chooses to leave work, seeking the company of his friend. I would call a friend, say I’m leaving work, going to the Golan, do you want to come?… first of all I like driving and I like driving in nature. I see the green and the nature and the flowing water, it gives me a boom of electricity in my head, my body, my soul.

In his view, nature energizes mentally, physically and spiritually. Though it is the passive viewing of nature that produces this electrifying effect, the words “green” and “flowing water” suggest a fecundity and vibrancy that is anything but passive. Indeed, exposure to the green in trees has been found to, not only have a calming effect but also to increase attention and contribute to psychological well-being (Cervinka et al. 2012; Lohr 2007; Tennessen and Cimprich 1995). An additional question that participants were asked was what they would do if they had more free time and if money were not a consideration.

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These questions were presented as hypothetical questions allowing a broad scope to imagine possibilities outside the constraints of one’s reality. It was hoped that this would reveal what participants considered the most desirable or worthy pastimes, though, in reality conceived as unattainable due to time pressure or economic constraints. In this way, the questions were hoped to delve into fantasies about free time and thus shed light on conceptions of worth related to free time practices. In response to the question of having more free time, a desire to pursue autotelic activities was expressed by many participants. This included a wish to engage in what Stebbins (2001) classifies “serious leisure,” such as painting, jewelry-making, singing, dancing, playing a musical instrument, baking and carpentry. As opposed to “casual leisure,” which is short lived and requires little or no skills, serious leisure, like flow activities, is thought to generate rewards, therefore they are likely to be regarded as worth investing in. Firstly, they are linked to the self since they are conceived as a form of self-expression and self-development. In addition, creative activities such as those mentioned by participants, require skill, which is generally acquired over a period of time. Thus the individual must commit her/himself to serious involvement in order to make progress. Stebbins points out that serious leisure may require more mental and physical effort than casual leisure, yet the deep involvement in such activities may free the individual from worries. In this way, it may be perceived as a means to be free from the stress of day-to-day life, while also allowing the individual to be free to invest in the self by pursuing activities that are envisaged as enjoyable, yet contributing to the cultivation of the self. Hence, when the individual does not have enough free time, it is experienced as a constraint on her/his freedom to pursue activities thought to be valuable. Work, for instance, was presented as an obstacle to participating in desired activities. Neta says, “My fantasy is to retire at the age of 55 in a year, now I’m 54, and realize tons of things that I haven’t managed to do.” Her words evoke a sense of frustration from not having been able to experience the “tons of things” that she wishes to do, so that the contemplation of retirement seems like a “fantasy.” She elaborates saying, “I do fantasize about retiring, when I’ll study, volunteer more, study more, more hobbies, trips.” Her list suggests that, for her, worthy pastimes are linked to self-realization as well as contributing to others. When posed with the question of imaginary free time that is unlimited by time constraints or monetary considerations, many participants, like

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Neta, referred to a more serious kind of leisure. Beth, for example, envisages using this imagined time for “all sorts of courses.” For her too, work is experienced as a constraint, which she links to both time and money. This is evident when she is asked what she would do if money were not a consideration. She says, “I would study music…would go down to half time work and free that time for other things.” For Beth, being free from monetary considerations may enable her, not only to pursue certain types of activities, but also allow more free time in which to do them. The fact that she does not wish to stop working altogether, suggests that it is not the work per se that is seen as an obstacle in the way of her free time choices, but rather the sense of time pressure that encroaches upon her freedom to realize them. Others did not specify work, yet they still implied a feeling of restriction on their freedom of choice. Amos says, “I would do a few things that I haven’t managed to do in life, that I’d like to do.” Asked to give examples, he refers to learning guitar, doing more sport and doing “all sorts of courses.” These quotes suggest a certain sense of dissatisfaction at not having time to pursue a range of pastimes that one desires, many of which are associated with self-realization. Academic studies were also mentioned as a way to use this imagined time. Adina responds saying, “I’d go and study all the time…I would go study architecture… that’s been my dream for many, many years.” Like the word “fantasy,” the term “dream” suggests that her wish may be conceived as unattainable. Her words imply that individuals may be caught in the flow of everyday life, which is experienced as an obstacle to one’s freedom to be able to pursue desires. This is what makes our hopes and desires seem like “fantasies” or “dreams.” Alon explains his wish to study law saying, “I love the field of law and…like if I had time today, let’s say if I was retired, I might go study for me, just… not to go open an office.” Here too, work was conceived as restricting one’s free time options. Alon therefore stresses that, for him, rather than studying with the goal of working in the field, he envisages it as doing something for himself. In other words, it is conceived as freedom to choose to follow personal interests. Perhaps the fact that participants indicated activities characterized by flow, suggests that the deep engagement involved is, on the one hand what makes them desirable, but also means they require greater commitment and effort so that they are not always seen as attainable. As we saw in Chapter 4, work and domestic duties were thought to be an obstacle to free time, and busyness was linked to stress and fatigue. Thus having

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more free time was associated with a relaxed state of mind, a “clear head” and more energy, thereby freeing the individual to pursue flow activities. Besides indicating activities linked to self-realization, participants expressed a wish to pursue other pastimes that they consider worthwhile. This included simple, everyday, readily available activities that can be done in the home, as well as special activities that require planning and leaving the private domain. For example, Denny responds to the question of having more free time saying, “Read, I don’t read at all. I get to bed so tired, I don’t read at all.” His words imply that busyness prevents him from reading, not because of the lack of time, but rather due to the fatigue possibly resulting from multiple duties. Some indicated going out as something they would like to do more often. Betty says this would give her “a lot of pleasure.” She specifies her desire to go to plays and concerts if she had more free time, adding “also trips, trips overseas. Once I used to much more. I miss it, seeing the world…cultures, views, I enjoy it all (laughs).” She explains that her heavy workload, as well as the fact that she has young children, prevent her from realizing these wishes. For Betty, this imagined time would allow her to be free to enjoy the things she likes and be free from the current obstacles. This desire to travel more, particularly overseas, was expressed by many participants. Leah says, “There is one thing I am sorry I don’t do, travel overseas.…something I haven’t done in the past years (laughs). Because I’m terribly… what, would I leave the kids?” Clearly, Leah sees her commitments to her children as being an external factor that makes traveling an unrealistic wish at present. Perhaps also, the fact that traveling requires a block of free time, explains why it is conceived as harder to attain, particularly if one feels free time is limited. When Erez is asked what he would do if he had more time, he replies, “The first thing that comes to mind is that I would like to organize a long trip.” The word “long” stresses the appeal of traveling without the constraints of time. Unlike the often fragmented nature of free time, imagined unrestrained time is seen as a chance to go on an extended trip. Maurice, too, expresses a wish to travel, explaining that it is an opportunity “to see new places and new cultures” as well as being “a kind of escape.” The change of scenery and culture serves as an escape from the ordinary routine of day-to-day life. The conception of traveling as freedom from dayto-day concerns, is also evident in Yigal’s words. He says, “That way I would really be able to switch off, without financial worries and nothing.” For Yigal, vacations are perceived as a means to remove oneself, not only from daily routine but also from sources of pressure associated with it.

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One of the major causes of stress, as we have seen in Chapter 4, was work. For Yaron, it is perceived as the primary obstacle that prevents him from being able to travel freely. When asked what he would do if he had more free time, he responds, “Travel…here and in the world… I really feel like it, you know, just take off 4 days to walk, start the trip to Metulah and go walking. I know I can’t because of work…I want to switch off.” For Yaron, work is experienced as having no set boundaries, thus even the idea of taking 4 days off work, is considered unrealistic. The words “just” and “go walking” seem to imply modest expectations that are linked to freedom in his mind. For others, financial considerations were perceived as an obstacle. When asked what he would do if money were not a consideration, Daniel’s initial reaction is, “I wouldn’t spend it much differently than I am today.” However, upon further reflection he adds, “I would like to do one or two big things like, go with the whole ­family for a holiday.” He explains saying, “To be with the family. Concentrate on family, no interruptions… always there are distractions, but that I would do definitely, if money was no object.” The fact that he emphasizes interruptions and distractions, suggests that external factors such as work may be linked to monetary considerations. For Daniel, the idea of being removed from these interruptions, would allow him freedom for quality time with his family. Interestingly, when asked about having more free time, some participants did not indicate specific imagined pastimes but focused on the mode rather than the activity itself. Again, the emphasis is on being free from the pressure that hinders one’s freedom to pursue free time activities of one’s choice, but also prevents the individual from being able to feel free. For example, Yasmin says, “If I had time, it is clear that it would be nicer like, doing everything at ease and not racing.” For Yasmin, being asked to contemplate the idea of having more free time brings to mind the potential sense of release associated with reducing time pressure. This feeling of “ease” may be experienced through activities that are thought of as simple, yet promote a sense of well-being as we see in Itai’s words. I think that if I had more time, I would do things for the soul… It could be simply meeting friends, it could be just sitting staring at the sky, don’t know…something that you’re not pressured to get things done…quieter time.

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For Itai, having more free time means being free from the feeling that one has to “get things done,” as well as being conceived as an opportunity to nurture the soul. The words “simply” and “just” highlight his idea of free time as a simple state of inner peace as one is released from the chains of external commitments. Discussion This chapter has focused on the positive experience and evaluation of free time as described by the participants of the study. The above findings present a hierarchization of free time (Fig. 5.1) that emerged in response to questions participants were asked relating to pleasure, their favorite pastimes and imagined free time. Figure 5.1 illustrates scales of worth, with imagined, wished for time at the top of the pyramid. The highest level represents what may be envisaged as the ultimate way to spend free time when it is free from constraints of time or money. The tier below it shows what participants imagine they would want to do if they had time for themselves. Although this also related to imagined time, perhaps it was considered closer to reality so that participants indicated simpler, everyday types of activities. The level below this indicates what participants classified as real favorite pastimes and at the bottom of the pyramid we see free time practices considered pleasure, though not necessarily favorites. Yet, it is important to note here that all the activities indicated in Fig. 5.1 were those that were positively evaluated by participants. In other words, the bottom of the pyramid does not imply a negative experience of indicated activities. When referring to pleasure, participants indicated both casual leisure, such as watching television, as well as serious leisure or flow activities, like sport or creative hobbies that require skill and perseverance (Stebbins 2001). While some activities were found to be motivated by their perceived results, others were indicated as being pursued for their own sake. Spending time in nature or going on vacation were also reported as positive, with participants describing these as relaxation or as an escape. Moreover, not only were solitary self-directed activities experienced as enjoyable and considered worthy, but so too was time with family and friends. Participants’ above descriptions of pastimes were found to be in keeping with their freedom-centered definitions of free time, discussed in the Chapter 4. Certain activities in both real and imagined free time,

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Wish traveling serious leisure studies, enrichment outings

Time for the self (if) sport, reading, nature quiet -relaxation social time -family, friends

Favorite family, sport, friends, reading

Pleasure sport, puzzles, cooking, outings, vacations, TV, reading, music, quiet time, Shabbat Fig. 5.1  The hierarchization of free time

were perceived as freedom from constraints, routine and pressure, while others were presented as freedom to pursue pleasure or self-realization. Participants’ descriptions uncovered motives that may be related to perceived benefits associated with the wide range of activities that were performed or wished for. This is supported by previous research that has linked free time activities with physical, psychological and mental rewards. Sport and hobbies have been indicated as contributing to pleasure, personal growth, self-esteem, and general well-being (Csikszentmihalyi 1997; Fox 1999; Ryan and Deci 2000; Wankel and Berger 1990). Spending time in nature has been found to promote relaxation, reduce stress and restore attention (Cervinka et al. 2012; Kaplan and Kaplan 1989; Lohr 2007; Tennessen and Cimprich 1995; Townsend

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and Weerasuriya 2010) and vacations have been positively linked to happiness and well-being (Gilbert and Abdullah 2004; Nawijn and Veenhoven 2011). In addition, time spent with family and friends is correlated to happiness (Argyle 2013; Csikszentmihalyi 1997; Diener and Seligman 2002; Kahneman et al. 2004). Besides relating to real time, participants were asked to envisage potential, imagined time. Asking about favorite activities or those related to pleasure, shed light on what participants experience positively, whereas the conditional questions highlighted how they envisage desirable free time. Imagined time, at the top of the pyramid, may reveal what is culturally accepted as worthy as well as what the individual feels s/he is missing when free time is limited by external constraints, such as time or money. What, then, can we learn from participants’ desires and fantasies related to free time? As we saw, contemplating time for the self, did not evoke a wish to pursue activities noticeably different from real ones already performed. However, imagining more free time or not being constrained by monetary matters, elicited a desire to pursue activities associated with selfrealization and self-development. Participants indicated that the main value of time for the self is the fact that it can be devoted to the self without interruption from other people or duties. This may explain why simple, seemingly mundane activities were experienced as pleasure. Thus, it is not so much what one does with this time for the self, but rather, its quality of being uncontaminated by external interferences that is its major appeal. A free time activity that is “contaminated” by a constraining activity is experienced differently to one that is “pure” and people feel more rushed when their free time is fragmented (Bittman and Wajcman 2000: 171). Hence the desire for more free time. Time pressure and financial constraints may therefore be experienced as impinging on one’s freedom of choice so that the individual may feel unable to realize the self, or follow one’s dreams, as is often said. Consequently, participants’ wishes for this imagined time, unrestrained by either time or financial considerations, revealed a sense of freedom that is associated with a change of pace and the opening up of an array of possibilities from which to choose. The individual is, therefore able to envisage a potential self, which Hochschild (1997: 235) defines as “imagined future possibilities” and “fantasy creations of time poor.” Thus, unfettered by external restraints, free time is ideated as an arena of freedom for the realization of desirable selves.

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The centrality of freedom was found to be integral to the positive experience and evaluation of free time, whether due to the notion of freedom from external constraints or the idea of freedom to pursue activities that one chooses or considers worthwhile. But could there be other characteristics that may contribute to a positive experience of free time? In search of such qualities, I expected binary oppositions that would distinguish between pastimes that are experienced positively and negatively and those perceived as worthy and unworthy. Table 5.8 presents a typology of positive free time according to possible characteristics that may, perhaps help us understand what accounts for the positive experience of certain activities and why some may be more highly ranked on the hierarchy of free time than others. As illustrated in Table 5.8, goals and benefits were indicated as contributing to the value of a pastime as was effort or planning, however many activities were described as enjoyable and desirable despite being unproductive, passive and mundane. For example, listening to music is neither goal-oriented nor productive, yet it was experienced as pleasing. In addition, having time for the self, whether for self-investment or for relaxation, was found to generate

Table 5.8  Typology of positive free time Active Productive, goals-results Self-development-sport, studies, creative activities, enrichment Investment-money, effort, time sport, studies, serious leisure, flow activities vacations, outings-trips, cafes, movies Structured, planned, special courses, enrichment activities outings-movies, concerts, plays, cafes, restaurants vacations

Passive Unproductive, not goal-oriented reading, TV, music, nature, quiet time, vacations movies, concerts, plays, cafes Relaxing, escape reading, TV, music, nature, quiet time, holidays Mundane, everyday, available reading, TV, music, nature, quiet time, Shabbat time with spouse, children computer, puzzles, games

Time with others family, friends shared time and activities-weekends, sport, cafes, movies, trips, vacations

Time for the self sport, hobbies, studies, enrichment quiet time alone

Satisfaction self-fulfillment family, friends

Pleasure sport, puzzles, cooking, outings, holidays TV, reading, music, quiet time, Shabbat

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positive feelings, but so too was spending time with family and friends, described by many as their favorite pastime. Finally, while a deeper sense of satisfaction appeared to contribute to the perceived worth of free time, seemingly trivial activities were described positively too. How can these contradictions be explained? What, then, qualifies free time as positive and worthy and what shapes conceptions of ideal free time? The following chapters hope to deepen our understanding of these paradoxical characteristics by exploring various kinds of self that emerged in participants’ descriptions of free time use, as well as shedding light on cultural and discursive influences that may mold ideas of what is worthy and what is not, thereby directing actions and perceptions of free time.

Notes 1. Shabbat, the Jewish day of rest, begins at sunset on Friday and ends on Saturday at nightfall. Many Jews observe laws and customs such as lighting candles, blessing on wine and festive meals. Religious Jews also refrain from certain activities that are prohibited. For example, electrical and electronic appliances are not to be switched on or off which means that observant Jews do not use computers, cellphones or television during the Shabbat. 2. Family time will be explored in greater depth in Chapter 8, “The Family Self.” Suffice it to say here that it is highly valorized due to the familistic values that shape conceptions of worth.

References American Time Use Survey (ATUS). 2017. American Time Use Survey-2016 Results. Bureau of Labor Statistics. https://www.bls.gov/news.release/pdf/ atus.pdf. Accessed July 2017. Argyle, Michael. 2013. The Psychology of Happiness. London: Routledge. Bargh, John A., and Katelyn Y.A. McKenna. 2004. The Internet and Social Life. Annual Review of Psychology 55: 573–590. Bianchi, Suzanne M., John P. Robinson, and Melissa A. Milkie. 2006. Changing Rhythms of American Family Life. New York: Russell Sage Foundation. Bittman, Michael, and Judy Wajcman. 2000. The Rush Hour: The Character of Leisure Time and Gender Equity. Social Forces 79 (1): 165–189. Central Bureau of Statistics (CBS). 2014. Volunteering in Israel—Selected Data from the 2013 Social Survey for the International Volunteer Day [Hebrew]. http://147.237.248.50/reader/newhodaot/hodaa_template.html?hodaa=201419330. Accessed Feb 2015.

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Cervinka, Renate, Kathrin Röderer, and Elisabeth Hefler. 2012. Are Nature Lovers Happy? On Various Indicators of Well-Being and Connectedness with Nature. Journal of Health Psychology 17 (3): 379–388. Csikszentmihalyi, Mihaly. 1997. Flow and the Psychology of Discovery and Invention. New York: Harper Perennial. Diener, Ed., and Martin E.P. Seligman. 2002. Very Happy People. Psychological Science 13 (1): 81–84. Fox, Kenneth R. 1999. The Influence of Physical Activity on Mental Well-Being. Public Health Nutrition 2 (3a): 411–418. Gilbert, David, and Junaida Abdullah. 2004. Holiday Taking and the Sense of Well-Being. Annals of Tourism Research 31 (1): 103–121. Gracia, Pablo, and Gøsta Esping-Andersen. 2015. Fathers’ Child Care Time and Mothers’ Paid Work: A Cross-National Study of Denmark, Spain, and the United Kingdom. Family Science 6 (1): 270–281. Hampton, Keith, and Barry Wellman. 2001. Long Distance Community in the Network Society Contact and Support Beyond Netville. American Behavioral Scientist 45 (3): 476–495. Hartig, Terry, Gary W. Evans, Larry D. Jamner, Deborah S. Davis, and Tommy Gärling. 2003. Tracking Restoration in Natural and Urban Field Settings. Journal of Environmental Psychology 23 (2): 109–123. Hochschild, Arlie Russell. 1997. The Time Bind: When Work Becomes Home and Home Becomes Work. New York: Holt. Jacobs, Jerry A., and Kathleen Gerson. 2004. The Time Divide: Work, Family and Gender Inequality. London: Harvard University Press. Kahneman, Daniel Alan, B. Krueger, David A. Schkade, Norbert Schwarz, and Arthur A. Stone. 2004. A Survey Method for Characterizing Daily Life Experience: The Day Reconstruction Method. Science 306 (5702): 1776–1780. Kaplan, Rachel, and Stephen Kaplan. 1989. The Experience of Nature: A Psychological Perspective. Cambridge: Cambridge University Press. Lohr, Virginia I. 2007. Benefits of Nature: What We Are Learning About Why People Respond to Nature. Journal of Physiological Anthropology 26 (2): 83–85. Nawijn, Jeroen, and Ruut Veenhoven. 2011. The Effect of Leisure Activities on Life Satisfaction: The Importance of Holiday Trips. In The Human Pursuit of Well-Being, A Cultural Approach, ed. I. Brdar, 39–53. New York: Springer Science and Business Media. OECD. 2016. OECD Family Database—Social Policy Division—Directorate of Employment, Labour and Social Affairs. http://www.oecd.org/els/family/ database.htm. Accessed July 2017. Parker, Kim, and Gretchen Livingston. 2017. Six Facts About American Fathers. Pew Research Center. http://www.pewresearch.org/fact-tank/2017/06/ 15/fathers-day-facts/. Accessed July 2018.

132  M. SHIR-WISE Pieper, Josef. [1952] 2009. Leisure: The Basis of Culture. San Francisco: Ignatius Press. Richards, Greg. 1998. Time for a Holiday? Social Rights and International Tourism Consumption. Time and Society 7 (1): 145–160. Robinson, John P., and Geoffrey Godbey. 1997. Time for Life: The Surprising Ways Americans Use Their Time. University Park: Pennsylvania State University Press. Rojek, Chris. 1985. Capitalism and Leisure Theory. London and New York: Tavistock. Ryan, Richard M., and Edward L. Deci. 2000. Self-Determination Theory and the Facilitation of Intrinsic Motivation, Social Development and Well-Being. American Psychologist 55 (1): 68. Smith, David Horton. 1994. Determinants of Voluntary Association Participation and Volunteering: A Literature Review. Nonprofit and Voluntary Sector Quarterly 23 (3): 243–263. Statista. 2016. Average Daily TV Viewing Time Per Person in Selected Countries Worldwide in 2016. https://www.statista.com/statistics/276748/averagedaily-tv-viewing-time-per-person-in-selected-countries/. Accessed May 2017. Stebbins, Robert A. 2001. Serious Leisure. Society 38 (4): 53–57. Tennessen, Carolyn M., and Bernadine Cimprich. 1995. Views to Nature: Effects on Attention. Journal of Environmental Psychology 15 (1): 77–85. Townsend, M., and R. Weerasuriya. 2010. Beyond Blue to Green: The Benefits of Contact with Nature for Mental Health and Well-Being. Melbourne: Deakin University. Wankel, Leonard M., and Bonnie G. Berger. 1990. The Psychological and Social Benefits of Sport and Physical Activity. Journal of Leisure Research 22 (2): 167–182. Wilson, John, and Marc Musick. 1997. Who Cares? Toward an Integrated Theory of Volunteer Work. American Sociological Review 62 (5): 694–713.

CHAPTER 6

The Productive Self

The previous chapters have presented free time as positively evaluated and experienced, yet, as we shall see, the various selves that emerged reveal a more complex picture. Although freedom was indicated as central to the positive evaluation of free time, the coming chapters question the extent to which one’s free time is indeed free, and in what way individuals’ choices may be guided and modified by prevalent cultural discourses. Contemporary life is often associated with busyness and time pressure. In sharp contrast, free time, as we have seen, is thought of as free from the constraints of work, household tasks or family duties. It is envisaged as an arena of choice, where one is free to choose to do as one pleases. When we think about time, in general, and work in particular, we tend to associate it with efficiency and productivity, whereas free time is conceived as being free from these work-like characteristics. As the term suggests, it is free from the dictates of management and economy. In this chapter, I question the above assumptions. Is the dichotomy between work and free time as definitive as implied? I suggest that the connection between work and free time is not based solely on its antithetic distinction, but on the spilling over of discursive characteristics An earlier version of this chapter was published as an article entitled, “Disciplined Freedom: The Productive Self and Conspicuous Busyness in ‘Free’ Time,” in Time and Society, 2018. https://doi.org/10.1177/0961463X18769786. It is published by permission of the publisher, Sage Journals. © The Author(s) 2019 M. Shir-Wise, Time, Freedom and the Self, Leisure Studies in a Global Era, https://doi.org/10.1007/978-3-030-13841-7_6

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of the former into the latter. My focus here is not on how our work affects our free time or visa versa (Kelly 2009; Parker 1976). Nor do I mean to enter into the question of boundaries between work and leisure. My findings suggest, rather, that certain free time activities and the way we perceive them are shaped by discursive principles of work. In other words, the work ethic may influence action, but also perceptions of time and how it should be utilized, including for the self-project (see Chapter 2). Treating free time as a site where the self is constructed in the context of culture, I expound on the intricate link between ideals of productivity and efficiency and the goal of achieving a desired self that is characterized by these qualities. The Productive Self emerged in the interviews as the sine qua non of reaching set goals, with the individual being held responsible for outcomes. Self-control and management were indicated as the means of attaining a self that is in keeping with sociocultural ideals. In order to explore this aspect of free time I offer the theoretical concept, disciplined freedom. This term refers to the contradictory ways whereby culture promotes a disciplinary form of self and time management while clinging to individualistic ideals of freedom and choice. I use this concept to explore the illusion of freedom with regards to free time and the self as I investigate the ways participants spent that time and how they talked about it. I shall begin by firstly examining the way in which the discourse of work ethics, rooted in capitalism, colors participants’ conceptions of free time, as well as perceptions and presentations of self. Secondly, I focus on certain free time practices that are directed toward the self-project and, though perceived as being a matter of free choice, they share characteristics not unlike those of work. It is here that capitalistic and therapeutic discourses overlap, since both focus on goals and productive work as a means of achieving them. Lastly, I illustrate the way in which the therapeutic ethos is reflected in the language of participants, their perceptions and their actions.

The Busy Self Productivity, efficiency and time management were found to be essential precepts of the productive self. As discussed in Chapter 2, these maxims are taken for granted in the realm of work or other duties whereby utilitarian principles assume outcomes, which require industriousness in

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order to achieve them. In contrast, free time is seemingly free of such assiduous efforts. It is supposedly unconstrained by extrinsic forces, thus allowing agency, so that the individual is able to follow intrinsic desires. Productivity and control are not, prima facie, fundamental to free time. However, the language of participants reveals that free time too, is suffused with notions of economy, yet, rather than being thought of as obligatory, it is perceived as being motivated by the individual’s wants. The Vocabulary of Control and Choice Having free time was presented as a matter of control and choice. Dana, a 47-year-old mother of 4, who takes pride in being a full time homemaker, says, “I certainly insist on taking a bit of time for myself.” Participants did not describe free time as something that you either have or don’t have, but rather as subordinate to the individual’s control. For example, Erez, 42, a father of 4, who reports working very long hours in his own business, says, “I have enough time for myself. When I want time alone with myself, I am alone with myself.” Agency is implied as central and having time to oneself is perceived as a choice. A sense of control is linked to the belief that one is free to choose and free from external factors. When asked about when she feels a sense of freedom, Betty, a 50-year-old mother of two, who works full time as a product manager in a dental company, stresses autonomy and control. “Managing my time without, how do you say? In the most independent manner. Feeling that I, I take, I decide, and nobody else organizes my.. my programs.” The words, “managing,” “take” and “decide,” all highlight a sense of active control over her free time. Indeed, time management emerged as central to perceptions of free time as well as time use in general. Participants suggested that free time must be “filled” and only then is it positively valued. Eran, a 43-yearold naval officer, father of 2 says, “All free time I like to fill with something…I’m not calm when I’m not doing anything.” Inactivity, for Eran, is experienced as generating negative feelings in contrast to the filling of time, which is thought of as worthy. The mayor’s view of free time as a resource that must be utilized, is evident in the following quote: You could say it’s a resource that you have to know how to plan rather than treat as something open to suggestions…I find that whenever I plan

136  M. SHIR-WISE my free time or at least make sure that some of it is planned ahead after thinking about things, ideas, hobbies that I connect to, that I’m interested in, then I feel more satisfaction. I also manage to utilize, to realize myself better. It also affects my work life and also my family…

He suggests that free time is linked to satisfaction and self-realization when “planned ahead” and managed rationally, “after thinking.” Besides having positive implications for the self, it affects other areas of life. He adds, “I find it relaxes me, fulfills me, satisfies me, generally recharges new energy.” In this way, time management and productivity are linked to results. Besides generating a sense of fulfillment, it is experienced as relaxing, which, in turn has an energizing effect. Not only should time be filled and planned, but it must also be maximized. This emerged in language, which highlighted the crucial qualities of productivity and efficiency. Time use is presented as determined by goals that must be achieved in the most time effective way, speed being a central feature of time management. Certain vocabulary, repeated by the participants, expresses the value of utilizing time to complete tasks. These words, used in Hebrew, have multiple meanings. Since language may reflect culture as well as shape perceptions, I shall now examine a number of these words and their derivations. I begin with a word that was used repeatedly by many participants. The Hebrew word “Lenatzel,” means to utilize or put to good use, but, interestingly, it also means to take advantage of or exploit. Similarly, variations of the word “Maspik” have dual connotations. When used as a verb, it means to manage to get things done, implying the use for maximum output, and, when used as an adjective, it means enough or satisfactory. Both words suggest a positive, productive use of time, stressing the ultimate utilization of time for the utmost in outcomes. They also imply agency since the individual is presented as being in control of time and thus able to take advantage of it. Liron, father of 3, who owns a successful company, describes weekends, saying “I like to utilize (lenatzel) that long quiet evening. So you get (maspikim) as much as possible done. That’s it, just taking it easy doesn’t appeal to me. No really not. It’s like a waste.” Unfilled time is considered a waste and the failure to use time to do as much as possible may be perceived as idleness. Even vacations are described as time to be utilized so as to contribute to pleasure. Denny says, “I enjoyed every second, or I went to a zimmer with my wife and we utilized (took advantage of/nitzalnu) every second.”

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The optimization of time emerged as a salient theme related to time in general. Neta, a 54-year-old mother of 4, with one child still living at home, works long hours in a managerial position as well as being active in volunteering. She emphasizes the importance of time management, saying, “I try to put a few things into my schedule…I actually color it into my diary, I try to be efficient…I make good use of my time (menatzelet/ take advantage of).” Itai, 47-year-old father of 3, who is chief of the town’s security, suggests that, despite the possible negative effects of time pressure, it also motivates him toward the utilization of time. He explains, Time pressure motivates me. It’s absurd that it.. it is stress that is harmful but stress that motivates. I like to be pressured, I like to manage to get (lehaspik) a few things done in a day. It’s funny but sometimes spare time, if it’s not used well, its boring and then you find yourself, what should I do?

Unfilled time is described, not only as boring, but as something with which a productive person may not know how to deal. What is important is the daily output. Busyness is worthy in itself while empty time is unworthy. Speed and clockwork were conveyed by the use of an onomatopoeic word and its derivations. The words “letaktek” and “metuktak” sound like the ticking of the clock, which is, in fact one of the meanings of the word. However, interestingly, it is used colloquially to mean getting things done quickly and efficiently. This was the meaning intended by the interviewees as we see in the following quote, My schedule is absolutely efficient (metuktak). I really know, when the day begins, I know exactly what I’m doing that day… I have to get things done (letaktek,) finish and accomplish productive outcomes and that, and I must keep to my schedule…

Time management involves planning, keeping to the plan and executing it efficiently. Only then can one achieve “productive outcomes.” Multitasking: Maximizing Time The ultimate use of time involves multitasking. Indeed much of modern technology not only allows multitasking but encourages it. Mobile phones, for example, are used while waiting in queues, driving and even

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in the company of friends and family. This, as well as television and computer use, will be discussed more closely in a later chapter devoted to media consumption. The expression, saving time, implies that time is a commodity like money, even though we cannot really save time and put it away for another day (Katz et al. 2000). Multitasking is aimed at saving time by utilizing it to do more than one activity simultaneously and, as we saw in Chapter 2, most of the literature relates to multitasking as juggling various duties. Indeed, participants, particularly mothers, boasted their ability to execute a number of tasks at once. This generally included childcare, household chores such as cleaning or cooking, and work duties. However, the interviewees of the study also talked of free time activities in their multitasking. For example, Oren, a 42-year-old father of 5, who works in a hi-tech company, reported preparing sandwiches for school while watching television, whereas a number of mothers said they fold washing or do the ironing in front of television. Others mentioned using the driving time to and from work to make phone calls and listen to music. Waiting in queues was described as a waste of time so participants reported doing something else in that time. One mother said she takes a book to read while waiting for her children at afterschool activities. Another, who described herself as time pressured, said she hates waiting at the doctor, so she always takes her crocheting to do. In other words, participants presented themselves as utilizing time by combining free time activities with duties. Yet, multitasking was not necessarily restricted to using time for the sake of duties. Erez describes the way he makes use of his time to do a number of free time activities simultaneously. He repeats the word “lehaspik” which emphasizes the idea of managing to get enough done, a satisfactory amount. Nevertheless, he is aware of the problematic side. It’s at the same time. You sit with your laptop, a newspaper next to you too and also..You do everything at the same time. Interviewer: Because? To get things done (manage to –lehaspik), Here you have the football, here the series, and here the paper, that you have to read today. Managing (lehaspik) to get everything done. The fact that you don’t see that, don’t see that, don’t see period. But you try to get things done (lehaspik) all the time…

The words “have to” suggest a feeling of compulsion to get as much done as possible despite the understanding that the quality of the activity

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is thus impaired. Nevertheless, he still boasts his ability to multitask, challenging the myth that only women can do so. He says, “I can also cook, I can also talk. I can play with someone.. They say that only women are capable of doing a few things at the same time. But men can too.” In this way, he conveys the notion of multitasking as a capability worth having and an integral part of the Productive Self. Indeed, participants made a point of reporting the fact that they did various activities simultaneously. Since productivity and efficiency were implied as valuable assets, they expressed pride in the way they optimize their time, which was a crucial part of their self-presentation and linked to an optimal self. Participants presented themselves as being productive by nature. Not only did they describe their time use in terms of efficiency, but they presented themselves as “one of those people” who possess this attribute. It appears that the high value of productivity must be assimilated into one’s very being, therefore a person’s character is required to match ideals of a productive self. Participants integrated this quality into their selfpresentation reflecting on it with pride. The merit of productivity even put into question the value of sleep as we see in the following quotes: “I am one of those who thinks sleeping is a waste of time so I try to utilize my time (lenatzel, take advantage) to its end” or “There is no way that I’m not busy, no way. I don’t.. I can’t.. for example, have a nap.” If being “busy” is valued, sleep is thus perceived of as “a waste of time.” Alon, the owner of a small business and father of 3 young children, expresses a sense of pressure from various work and home commitments and, even though he indicates the problematic side of being “one of those people who has to get everything done,” an underlying self-worth is discernible as he points out the positive side, accentuating his high level of efficiency: I have a problem. I am one of those people who has to get everything done. I am one of those people for who there is no tomorrow. What I have planned for today will be today, because tomorrow I know there will be more things that I won’t get done. No, I don’t put anything off, I don’t put anything off. On the one hand, it’s not good, but.. I get loads and loads and loads of things done that others wouldn’t get done in two years.

The repetition of the phrase, “I don’t put anything off”, as well as the words, “loads and loads and loads,” highlights the perceived link between

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agency and achieving maximal results. On the one hand, he presents this compulsion as a personality trait over which he has no control, yet it is also depicted as an attribute based on control and perhaps self-discipline. His productive competence is magnified by social comparison to others, thereby enhancing his self-esteem. Yet for other participants, social comparison may also lead to a sense of inadequacy and a desire to conform to cultural scripts of a Productive Self. Indeed, many participants, when comparing themselves to others, expressed a wish to become more time efficient. The output of others served as a yardstick by which they measured their own level of efficiency. Social comparison may thus lead to feelings of dissatisfaction and even jealousy as we see in the following quote. Yaffa, a 49-year-old ­special education teacher and mother of 5, says, “I see people who get loads done, and I’m not saying that it doesn’t make me jealous sometimes. Wow, how do people get so many things done?” Social comparison makes her more self-conscious of her “flaw.” Feelings of inadequacy are generated by a perceived inefficacy. In addition to measuring oneself in relation to real others, it seems there is a discrepancy between the perceived self and notions of a perfect self. Hence, the individual feels s/he must work to rectify the disparity. Interestingly, a sense of inadequacy regarding time use was not necessarily linked to a feeling of time deficiency. Yaffa says she has a lot of time for herself but she adds, “I don’t know if it is channeled efficiently for some sort of accomplishment.” Perhaps the feeling that she does have time for herself, intensifies her sense of incompetence since she believes the time is not utilized for “accomplishment.” Similarly, Ofrah and Effie express dissatisfaction with the way they use their time saying, “I just don’t do enough with it,” and “I would like to be able to allot my time differently.” Ilana’s words suggest that time management is a matter of individual responsibility. She says, “if I wanted to, I would be able to find more,” implying that a failure to make time may be experienced as personal failure. Time management is thus perceived as being linked to competence and facilitating productivity. When obstacles present themselves, the individual is expected to take responsibility to find solutions in order to overcome problems. For instance, Madlyn, mother of 2 who works from home, relates to the difficulty of not having enough consecutive time when wanting to pursue free time activities that require uninterrupted time. She reflects upon the way she uses time, saying, “Maybe it could be organized better and then

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enjoyed more.” In her view, free time must be managed if one is to enjoy it. The individual is expected to take responsibility by making time and utilizing it. We have seen that productivity and efficiency emerged as central in the self-presentation of many of the participants who portrayed themselves as capable individuals, able to cope efficiently with the many demands of everyday life. However, those who felt less productive, saw this as a defect requiring corrective work. It seems that productivity is, not only an essential component of time management, but also an integral part of the desired self. It is no wonder then, that people take pride in presenting themselves as busy. The more one can do, the better. In this way, work ethics color our perception of time so that working hard to achieve the maximum output is thought of as worthy. As we have seen, it follows that if the utilization of time is desirable, free time, too, should be filled. But with which activities is time filled and how are these evaluated? In what way is this time linked to conceptions of a desirable self?

The Managed Self As we saw in participants’ definitions of free time presented in Chapter 4, free time is thought of as a domain of freedom where one has time for oneself. Since it is considered nonobligatory time, it allows the individual time for self-cultivation. Unlike work, free time is not thought to be determined by others, thus one is able to invest in the self. However, self- investment, central to the therapeutic discourse, as discussed in Chapter 2, can be hard work, requiring self-discipline. On the one hand, we feel that our free time practices are shaped by our personal choices. The self-project may be conceived as an expression of this freedom and free time as an appropriate arena in which desired selves can be pursued. On the other hand, conceptions of a perfect self may promote a selfgaze, which in turn, generates a need for self-management as we pursue ideal models. A managed self requires personal responsibility and hard work, prerequisites for embarking on and sustaining the self-project, which requires self discipline if one is to achieve results. Wasting Time and Self-Discipline If productive time is positively evaluated, it follows that unproductive time may be perceived as undesirable. Certain pastimes, particularly

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media practices, which I discuss in greater detail in the following chapter, were presented as negative, or as a “waste of time,” unless accompanied by a productive or useful activity. Here, I give a number of examples to illustrate the link between conceptions of productivity, self-discipline and the evaluation of free time practices. Television, for example, was described as “burning time,” “drinking a lot of time,” or “a real waste of time.” Pursuing such activities may, therefore, be interpreted as a lack of self-discipline and negatively valued. Leah, mother of 4 young children, a full time school counselor, describes watching TV as the antithesis of productivity. “There are times when I say, how I wasted my time now. I just sat for an hour in front of that meaningless program and I could have done a thousand and one other things.” Watching television is experienced as “meaningless,” particularly when weighed against the potential productivity of the time spent on it. The discrepancy between a desired, productive self and one that is “wasting” time may generate a sense of frustration or guilt. Computers and mobile phones were also noted by participants as “a waste of time.” Besides indicating the unproductive nature of the use of these devices in free time, the lack of control was emphasized as the user gets carried away without even noticing. …. Once I go into Facebook I just I find it very time consuming that you can suddenly be there for half an hour or even an hour, I don’t know, an hour, but like you know, its much more time consuming than you think. You think you are just going to pop into Facebook for a minute but then you end up going from one person to the other person, check out this check out that and then before you know it you have been, and that’s what I will feel at the end of it often is a waste of time.

The participant describes a failure to manage time and exercise selfdiscipline, since she does not adhere to the intended short duration for the activity that can end up lasting an hour rather than the planned minute. Time is thus “consumed” rather than being controlled and utilized by the individual. For Yaffa, educating toward productivity and time management is crucial. This is juxtaposed with a negative view of various media, which are described as an unworthy waste of time. The whole subject of utilizing time (Nitzul) is a subject in the house.. The approach that you have to.. that a person doesn’t consciously burn time,

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is something that we.. that really, really disturbs us and TV and computer is something that you consciously waste …

The implication is that unproductive activities should be avoided and that wasting time may be morally questionable. Not wasting time is presented here as a principle that should be instilled in the family. Bodywork and the Self-Gaze Productivity and personal responsibility were found to be central to the self-project. Bodywork is an integral part of the self-project, demanding hard work in order to reach desired goals. One activity found to be closely associated with bodywork was sport. This is based on certain assumptions about it value. The value of sport was widely discussed both by those who do sport activities as well as by those who do not. While many described it as a source of pleasure, others related to it with a goal-oriented approach. Some reported disliking it or even hating it. Yet, there was a clear consensus regarding its worth. Certainly, the approach that sport is worthy is communis opinio. Biomedical and therapeutic discourses acclaim its benefits for health and well-being. Indeed, when participants were asked in the questionnaire about their main reason for doing sport, among those who reported doing so regularly, health (83%) and/or pleasure (71%) were the domi­ nant responses. Only 37% indicated improving physical appearance as a reason for sport activity. While the first two were noted as a sole motive, the third was reported only as one of three reasons. However, although the question of weight and looks were not highly rated in the questionnaire as a reason for doing sport, the interview uncovered inner motives. The importance of physical appearance emerged as a central concern and motivator for sports activities. Perhaps this suggests that discourses calling for ideal bodies are internalized without the individual being aware. Sport was closely linked to body image and perceived as a means of achieving a desirable self. Yasmin, a 42-year-old sports teacher and mother of 4, says she enjoys sport but also relates to it as part of selfwork. Although she does not appear to be overweight, she considers her body as something that requires work, “I want to look good. My body weight bothers me very, very much. So I do work on it. Exercise, eating, health.” For Yasmin, in order to attain a desirable body, the individual

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must work toward the goal through various means that perhaps require self- discipline. This goal-oriented approach is also evident in the following. Denny, 51, a sales manager with 3 children, does sport 4 times a week. He makes a point of saying that he really doesn’t enjoy it, yet considers it something that he must do, as it has a “very, very, clear aim”. He explains, “I have lost 8 kilo and I want to keep it off ”. Thus sport, as he sees it, is a form of bodywork that, even when not enjoyed, is worthy since it serves a purpose. However, assiduity is highly ranked as a value in itself. It seems that the very fact that one is willing to work hard toward achieving a goal is highly regarded. Efrat, 53, has 3 children and works long hours as a psychologist in a senior position, as well as studying for her Phd. When explaining why she likes sport, work is presented, not only as a means to an end, to burn calories and to get in shape, but also as the end itself. I need to feel like I did something hard so it makes you feel that you worked hard. It also gives you justification to eat more because you realize that you have burnt calories. I like it, outdoors, indoors. Although after I suffer, my whole body aches. My body aches all the time, but it’s okay, it’s a good ache.

For Efrat, hard work is rewarding. Pain is considered worthwhile or “a good ache” when it is thought to be productive, but perhaps it is also seen as evidence of the strenuous effort, valued for its own sake and indicative of self-discipline. Indeed, a central value of the work ethic is self-discipline. Selfwork also requires willpower and determination. Just as time management calls for the rational, and often rigid, organization of time, so too does self-management which demands keeping to rigorous routines. Participants used expressions like “I try to be strict with myself,” “I got myself used to,” “I work on myself,” or “I have to push myself.” Sport, in particular was related to, as an activity requiring self-discipline. Perhaps certain models have been internalized as correct, so that the individual feels a need to work toward attaining a body in keeping with ideals. It is not surprising, that female participants, more than males, indicated a very clear connection between bodywork and the self image. Managing the body is perceived as a responsibility that, as women, must be accepted and fulfilled.

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The manager of the country club relates to the question of pleasure versus goals as motivators for doing sport. He specifies that women, in particular, go to exercise classes even though they don’t necessarily enjoy it because they feel that they must watch their figures. He points out, however, that women say that they do feel good in the end since they have burnt calories and look better, “so they enjoy the results.” Observing the differences between male and female members, he says, “Most of the women come for body shaping, shaping to watch their appearance, I think that looks and health, that’s the aim of the women, men more to the gym, swimming aerobic sport.” His observations suggest that women, in particular, are concerned with the appearance of their bodies, which motivates them to do sport. Debra, 44, a lecturer and a mother of 4, talks about sport, suggesting that it is a matter of deciding to invest time and effort. She says, “Five kilo less would clearly contribute to my level of happiness. But it looks like it’s not important enough to me, because I don’t manage to do it.” A selfgaze leads to feelings of unworthiness and the correct bodyweight is seen as a crucial factor in the attainment of happiness. The failure to take responsibility for achieving a desirable body thus becomes an obstacle to happiness. For Adina, 51, an interior designer with 5 children, sport is seen as positive. Like Debra, she finds fault in herself for not finding the time or having the stamina. “I think it’s good for you in all respects. But..I don’t get around to it. I don’t have the energy. Maybe I’m just lazy…” It seems that, because sport is considered worthy and conceived as contributing to a desirable self, a failure to do it is experienced as an incapacity for self-mastery. Similarly, Itai, the security officer, expresses a sense of frustration as he indicates the source of the problem as internal rather than external. Here, too, laziness is indicated as the reason for inactivity, “I am dying to do sport but I am just lazy by nature.” The underlying message is that a failure to conform to accepted and expected practices is interpreted as a lack of self-discipline and even a flaw in one’s character. There seems to be very little room for alternative explanations. Despite the self-discipline associated with sport, it was generally considered a free time activity among both men and women. Other self-management practices, however, were perceived as time for the self, though not necessarily considered a free time activity. Leah describes going to a cosmetician, as time for herself on the one hand, but also as

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a necessity. She sheds light on the expectation that women must manage and improve their bodies. It’s a kind of time for myself. I can’t say it is always an enjoyable time, I don’t know if fixing your eyebrows is so enjoyable (laughs) but.. I think that part of it is something that you say, well as a woman, I have to, I have no choice. I can’t go.. with a skirt without my legs being done. As far as I’m concerned it’s a must.. But yes, it’s part of..Yes also time for yourself. It’s like something that you say, okay now I am taking care of myself.

Her words imply that beauty care is a responsibility of women. Like sport, it is not always perceived as pleasure, but it is necessary in order to achieve a self in keeping with notions of a desirable female self. It is described as “a must” leaving the individual with “no choice.” This requires self-discipline. At the same time, bodywork is promoted, not only as a means to an end, but also as a form of self-investment, or time for oneself and thus may be interpreted as self-empowerment or as self-indulgence. For instance, Debra describes having her nails done as “wonderful,” continuing, “that, I do entirely for myself.” Time surveys do not generally classify beauty care as free time, but rather as personal care. This category includes sleeping, eating and grooming. Personal care activities are defined as “the simple maintenance required for all human beings” (Robinson and Godbey 1997: 111). I argue that, just as one would not consider eating in a restaurant, “simple maintenance,” bodywork practices cannot be equated with dayto-day grooming activities such as showering or brushing one’s teeth. Considering the increasing time, money and effort invested in beauty care such as nail construction, cosmetic treatments or medical procedures, I suggest that it is problematic to refer to such practices as “simple maintenance.” Moreover, as we have seen, subjectively, bodywork is often perceived as time for the self, envisaged as a means to achieving a desirable body and thus experienced as self- empowerment. The internalization of sociocultural ideals of a perfect body, include, not only the correct weight, hair-free legs and shaped eyebrows, but also smooth, youthful looking skin. Indeed, age emerged as a significant motivator toward bodywork among female participants. Ilana, a 42-yearold mother of 3, who works full time in a senior position, says that being over 40 has made beauty care even more important to her. Giving examples, she mentions pigmentation treatment that she has recently begun,

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as well as having become more stringent about fitness and her body. Betty, who has recently turned 50, comments that she is bothered by wrinkles and says she would like to do cosmetic treatment to make them “vanish.” Neta is adamant as she clarifies the necessity of bodywork, by implying the negative implications if one does not fulfill this responsibility as a woman. I think a woman must, must always look well kept, and when she is older, all the more, otherwise she will be repulsive. She must dye her hair and must look okay and must keep in shape. Yes, certainly. Of course she must.

The various means of correcting possible causes of unattractiveness are offered as solutions yet, the repetition of the word “must” accentuates the lack of choice in the matter. Gabe, the mayor relates to the stigma associated with age when referring to the fact that the town’s “fashionable trend in running or bike riding…doesn’t appeal to the young.” He ponders the question, saying, Because of our wish not to age, wanting not to be thought of as old, not to be considered to be lacking physical ability, physical, because when you’re young you don’t have to prove it… when you get to 40, 50, you feel like a slouch, you feel you’re getting old, you are in a crisis. So you say to yourself, what, can’t I run 2000 meters? 3000 meters? So you run 2000, 3000 and …it becomes an obsession.

According to Gabe, middle-aged individuals, who he believes are “in a crisis,” may be particularly conscious of the gaze of others so that they feel they must prove their worth. Though it may be perceived as a matter of free choice, the individual is, perhaps, driven by a sense of compulsion or “obsession” to manage the self. It seems that at the heart of the disciplined self is impression management, designed to avoid stained identities. Managing the self, which requires sedulity, can avert the unpleasant or even “repulsive” effects of stigmatic selves, such as being overweight, looking or feeling old, or simply not having a perfect body. Thus, the individual is held responsible for managing the self and a failure to do so implies a character defect. Participants indicated bodywork, such as beauty care and sport as requiring self-discipline, yet implied that the two are also time for the self. Perhaps, the fact that both are perceived as goal oriented, or in the

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service of the self-project, means they are evaluated as a productive use of time and thus, a worthy way of filling free time.

The Therapeutic Self As discussed in Chapter 2, the therapeutic discourse stresses individual responsibility in the self-project, which is all encompassing. In addition to bodywork, self-management was aimed at self-realization, selfimprovement and self-transformation. It is not by chance that all these terms begin with the word self. Indeed, the therapeutic ethos is selfreferential (Nolan 1998). As we have seen, the individual is called upon to invest time and effort in the self in order to achieve desirable results. In this way, the therapeutic self is an integral part of the productive self, both being directed at the self-project. At the heart of the self-project is reflexivity (Giddens 1991), which may motivate the individual to take responsibility for outcomes. Reflexivity, Crossroads and Change Reflexivity involves contemplating the self and one’s actions, often reflecting on the past, the present and the future. The very nature of an in-depth interview provokes such self-examination as participants search for answers. This therapeutic approach was evident in the words of a participant who compared the experience of the interview as similar to “lying on a couch in therapy.” Some described it as mentally and emotionally straining. They explained that the interview made them think about meaningful issues that are not addressed on a day-to-day basis. An additional catalyst for reflexivity is being at crossroads in one’s life. Like autobiographical occasions (Vinitzky-Seroussi 1998), life transitions may promote introspection as one evaluates the past and considers opportunities for change. Participants who were in transitional stages were particularly reflexive about the past, present and future since “unsettled lives” promote reflection on “new styles and strategies of action” (Swidler 1986: 279). Whether they expressed dilemmas or announced resolutions, these people indicated the autonomy of the individual as being central to the self-project. The use of a therapeutic language of self-management stressed the agency and responsibility of the individual. I now take a closer look at a number of participants who, at the time of the interview, were in transitional periods of their lives.

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As we shall see, this brought about greater reflexivity or as Archer (2010: i) puts it, “reflexive ‘internal conversations’” through which they were able to “deliberate about what course of action to take,” thereby leading to change in many cases. Vera, 41, immigrated as a teenager from Georgia in the former Soviet Union and had her first child at the age of 16. At the time of the interview she had just left a demanding managerial position. She describes the change that she underwent, from being a workaholic, to becoming aware that she had not been doing what she really wanted. This realization required reflexivity, serving as a starting point for self-transformation. The process, she says, began when she started going to a coacher. Describing the coaching process as one of self examination, she explains how it helps “look at your life, look at your relationships and see does.. does your life.. the quality of your life that you live, is it enough, does it satisfy you?… I understood that I don’t allow myself expression.” This introspection becomes a driving force for change, leading to the dramatic shift from working long hours and total immersion in her work, to leaving her work and allowing herself free time. In addition to coaching, she speaks of spiritual guides who “showed me the gap between what I think is right and what I really long for,” as well as self help books that, she says, helped her realize what she wanted to do with her time. She describes herself as still being very busy but now thinks of free time as time for the self, which she spends in a variety of ways, such as participating in a dance group, playing piano, singing, and doing yoga and meditation, described as a means to relax and clear her head. Throughout the interview, words like “then,” “once” and “used to” in contrast with “now” or “today,” highlighted the sense of accomplishment resulting from the changes during the transition. Her words imply a temporal notion of agency that Emirbayer and Mische (1998: 963) suggest is “informed by the past…oriented to the future… and toward the present.” For Vera, reflexivity has enabled agency which facilitates change, not only in the way she uses her time but also in the manner in which she perceives free time. Eran, 42, an engineer serving in the navy, was to retire the year following the time of the interview. He sees this as a possible opportunity to be able to manage to get more things done that “I want to do and don’t have to do.” The realm of work is clearly perceived as constraining choice, so that retiring allows for time to do as one chooses. He says, “Perhaps, after 22 years of service, I deserve to do things that I like a bit

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more.” The word “deserve” implies that, for Eran, freedom to choose to pursue what one likes, is a matter of entitlement. Here too, crossroads in life is an occasion for reflexivity and an opportunity to be taken advantage of, where one can bring about change in one’s life. For Michal too, being in a transitional period of her life promoted reflexivity. Michal, a 46-year-old mother of 3, is a lawyer, who, after having been home for 10 months, is about to open her own practice in her house. Like Vera, her previous job was very demanding and she now feels she is “working on things and changing.” Interestingly, the word, “working” is used to describe the process. She says she has started doing sport, meeting with girlfriends on a regular basis, but most importantly she sees a change in her perceptions and understanding. She, too, uses the vocabulary of before and after, dotted with a therapeutic language of change. The time during the transitions is seen as an opportunity for reflexivity, “I need this time… I need that introspection, to think about things …” Besides exercise classes, where she enjoys both the physical activity as well as interaction with other women, she goes to a mystic therapy group which she describes as “a kind of internal work, work on the consciousness.” Work emerges as central to change, whether physical or psychological. Relating to the forthcoming shift in her career, she expresses a fear of losing the “balance” she has reached. Ofrah, is a 44-year-old mother of 2. Her husband’s deterioration due to a chronic illness, has deeply affected her approach to life. She becomes emotional as she talks of having made a conscious decision to begin investing in herself. And now I have suddenly begun to take care of myself…I am taking care of my teeth too and I am taking care.. after the operation that I did to staple my stomach, so I am starting to do sport and I intend to leave work. I intend to make a significant change in my life.

Here too, the words suggest a sense of agency as temporally embedded (Emirbayer and Mische 1998: 963), as well as reflecting a therapeutic approach that calls for taking responsibility and working on the self as a means to bring about a multifaceted change in her life. While her words do not relate specifically to time use, they illustrate the centrality of the self-project, which, as we have seen, emerged as an integral part of many free time practices.

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Self-Improvement and the Self-Made Self The self-project incorporates, not only investing in the body, but also in the spirit or the soul as well as the intellect, as a means of attaining an optimal self. Free time is perceived as an arena for personal growth and even self-transformation. Whether it is through coaching, spiritual learning or sessions with psychic mediators, self- improvement and transformation emerge as both motives and outcomes. Daniel, 42, is a high tech project manager and father of 5 children. As a religious man, going to Talmud1 lessons is perceived as a means for spiritual growth and an expected part of the weekly routine. Yet his introspective appraisal reveals a certain sense of guilt as he describes his failure to do so regularly. I think for some people spiritual things are easier … they’re built in their nature for them. For me its much harder to do, going to a lesson (religious) for me is a relatively hard thing, I have to push myself to do it, I don’t do it all the time. I don’t have a big enough conscience in order to do something about it, so that’s.. I guess that’s the art of improving yourself, some people improve themselves.

As he reflexively ponders the goal of self-improvement, a paradoxical observation emerges. On the one hand, he suggests that certain character traits are inherent, perhaps beyond the individual’s control. On the other hand, he accentuates the need for self-discipline, something he seems to feel that he lacks. This may generate a sense of inadequacy, strengthened by social comparison, which makes him all the more aware of the discrepancy between his actual self and a desired self. Much like sport, as we saw, his inability to “push” himself is perceived as a flaw and a lack of self-discipline. But it is also experienced as a hindrance to self-improvement and the word “conscience” may evoke a moral connotation. Other participants, as we have seen, utilize their free time to work on the self through more therapeutic practices, such as coaching. These activities, though self-oriented, rely on extrinsic agents. In other words, the meeting or session with the expert is an integral part of the process. While the self is presented as self-made, participants rely on external mechanisms that enable the construction of a desired self. In this way, despite the dependence on specialists to work on the self, the individual

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may interpret this as self-work since s/he has assumed responsibility. We shall see in the next chapter on the Consuming Self that turning to experts is encouraged by consumer culture. Coaching is one such practice that, as we have seen, is perceived as a reflexive process that brings about change. However, introspection is only part of the process. The coach or teacher, plays an integral role by imparting practical tools that can be utilized by the participant. Debra, who regularly attends group coaching sessions, highlights the rationalistic, utilitarian approach. “I think it’s a different way of looking at things. Looking at things through facts and logic…” She emphasizes the speedy, problem-solving qualities of coaching. You have something that bothers you, we solve it and that’s it. It’s very fast. Tik tak., she very quickly treats and makes progress and things get finished and solved. It’s amazing. It’s really magic. In my eyes it’s a kind of magic. So I’m going to learn the method.

While it is true that Debra uses the word “magic”, we must note that it is used to express her amazement about the ability to reach results using a quick, problem-solving “method.” In other words, it is the instrumental rationalism of the approach that is praiseworthy. Due to her enthusiasm, in addition to going to the weekly meetings, she reported studying the method with her coach’s mentee. Dana, fulltime homemaker and mother of 4, has been participating for four years, in weekly group sessions that she defines as spiritual learning. In contrast to Debra, she emphasizes, “there is no magic, like in mysticism.” Yet, she, too, highlights the instrumental role of the sessions that result in practical benefits. At the same time, the individual’s role in the process is indicated as crucial. …what is good is that it really depends only on you. You get a tool, whether you use it or not, there is a lot of self-acceptance. I used to know how to beat myself up, be tough with myself. And it is very.. the learning has changed that a lot, has changed me a lot.

While the individual is presented as being responsible for results, it is the learning that is thought to bring about change by providing the tools with which to achieve it.

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Michal, who attends weekly meetings with someone she describes as a psychic mediator, describes the process as difficult, yet rewarding. …a very, very significant change, it’s not an easy change to do. It’s a process. But I can say that from previous attempts of other missions, in quotation marks, that she gave me, that it makes amazing changes.

While it is described as a “process,” the practical aspect of “missions” and the role of the group leader who gives the “missions,” is what forges change. Thus, self- cultivation does not rely solely on reflexivity. It requires hands-on techniques and tools that are provided by specialists who facilitate change in a formal framework. At the same time, the individual is expected to take steps to initiate change as s/he works on the self in order to achieve results, namely a desired self.

Discussion While much of the literature makes a sharp distinction between work and leisure, the contrasting elements of one often used to define the other, the above findings suggest that the two may have much in common. I do not propose that work and free time are similar in practice but rather that they share certain meanings and values. Certainly, free time is not a paid occupation. On the contrary, people often pay for free time activities, as we shall see in the next chapter. Yet, as opposed to participants’ definitions that differentiate between work and free time with freedom being indicated as pivotal in the latter, these findings suggest a perception of free time that is colored by values of work, productivity and obligation. As we saw in Chapter 4, participants defined free time as freedom from duties, whether at work or at home, and thus free from stress associated with time pressure. It was also described as freedom to choose to do “what you feel like,” and as relaxing time for the self. The findings presented in this chapter paint a very different picture. My claim here is that the notion of free time as a realm of freedom may be an illusion. I suggest that it is a disciplined freedom, directed by discursive values that are internalized, becoming an inner voice that tells us how to manage our selves and our time. In this way, while free time was considered to be free from work or domestic duties, it was not entirely free from an obligation to busyness nor was it free from self-management practices that were experienced as a duty to oneself.

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The language of participants highlighted time management and e­ fficiency as central in their approach to time. Moreover, busyness, a cultural ideal associated with economic and social success (Bellezza et al. 2017; Daly 1996; Gershuny 2005; Roxburgh 2006; Sullivan 2008; Schor 1998; Wajcman 2014) emerged as an integral part of their presentations of self. If leisure and “conspicuous consumption” were once considered to be a sign of status as Veblen (1899/2007) claimed, I suggest that, what I have called conspicuous busyness, has now become the mark of status. By status, I do not only refer to the distinction of class, but also to the desirable state of worthy selfhood. I use the term conspicuous busyness to refer to the ways individuals present themselves as constantly busy in all spheres of life. As I have noted earlier, this reversal of Veblen’s leisure- class relationship has been indicated in past research. For instance, a recent study (Bellezza et al. 2017) which defined busyness as long working hours and the lack of leisure time (p. 119), found that an overworked lifestyle, rather than a leisurely one, has become a status symbol among Americans. This, like many other studies relating to time pressure, focuses on the division of time between work, whether paid or unpaid, and leisure. My claim is that conspicuous busyness is all encompassing. It is not simply a question of juggling various tasks, but rather a need to present oneself as productive and efficient at all times, so that not presenting oneself as such, may be construed as evidence of an inadequate and unworthy self. This is precisely what necessitates conspicuous busyness. By performing busyness, the individual displays a productive self. Following Kalberg’s (1992) use of a Weberian framework, I propose that, just as values of capitalism may shape motivation for work, it may also color conceptions of free time. Although Kalberg relates to work, his words may be equally true in relation to free time, “Frequently, cultural factors…bear the responsibility for such a sublimation of work-oriented action…” (p. 328). Perhaps work-like qualities in free time may similarly be perceived as “sublimation” so that free time is more highly valued when utilized. In Durkheimian terms, work is commended as sacred and idleness is denigrated as profane. Indeed, this precept is promoted in Judeo-Christian ideology.2 Consequently, when time is not optimized, the individual may feel inadequate and perhaps even ashamed, as Benjamin Franklin (1732/1997) suggests, “Be always ashamed to catch thyself idle.” Weber (1930/1992), quoting Franklin, indicates hard work and usefulness as fundamental virtues in the Protestant Ethic,

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while idleness, the antithesis of productivity is considered morally wrong, and wasting time, the “deadliest of sins” (p. 104). Although the Spirit of Capitalism focuses on work and the earning of money, I argue that the principles of the work ethic indicated by Weber are so deeply embedded in Western culture that they color all realms of life. My claim is that, since values of the work ethic, such as productivity and efficiency, permeate conceptions of free time, the Productive Self is as significant in free time as it is at work. Free time, though conceived as free, must therefore be utilized, and hyperactivity, in the cultural sense, is thus “revered and recommended” (Borgmann 1993: 14). Whereas work is often thought of as responsibility to the greater good or as linked to commitments to others, free time, as we have seen (Chapter 4) is conceived as time for the self.3 The therapeutic ethos, which has become a “taken for granted part of daily life” (Nolan 1998: 2) directs the individual toward self-work, thought to produce results (McGee 2005; Rose 1998). The reflexive project of self requires the individual to monitor and construct the self (Giddens 1991). In this way, the therapeutic ethos shares principles of the work ethic, which valorizes productivity, management and self-discipline. Yet unlike work, free time is associated with autonomy and control. This may be interpreted as freedom to construct a self of one’s choice. Individuality and happiness are perceived as a right and an ethical duty as the individual is responsible for her/his destiny (discussed in Chapter 2). Bauman (2005) suggests, that, since “everyone must be individual” people are actually alike (p. 16). In this way, self-work brings about conformity rather than individuality. Similarly, Cronin (2000) refers to “compulsory individuality” where “The self is framed as a future oriented goal to be achieved” (p. 276). The disciplined freedom of free time is rooted in individualistic values of entitlement and individuality that may generate a sense of freedom, as well as in capitalistic imperatives that discipline individuals to work toward a goal as a means of achieving desirable outcomes. This may make one feel that the self-project is “compulsory,” and that free time is an opportunity to work on it. The idea that “success results from actions and traits under one’s own control,” a premise of the American Dream (Hochschild 1995: 6), may mean that the individual is likely to experience a sense of personal failure when expectations are not met. Thus, in order to attain a worthy self and thereby avoid feelings of inadequacy, the individual is required to work on the self, a fundamental principle of therapeutic discourse.

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In a “makeover culture,” that encourages a sense of insufficiency (McGee 2005), people are expected to take control and manage the self. The failure to adopt supposedly self- empowering practices, may therefore be perceived as negligence or even laziness, so that the individual is “endlessly belabored.” As we have seen, participants utilized their uncommitted time to pursue self-management practices or, what Foucault (1988) refers to as Technologies of the Self, …which permit individuals to effect by their own means or with the help of others a certain number of operations on their own bodies and souls, thoughts, conduct, and way of being, so as to transform themselves in order to attain a certain state of happiness, purity, wisdom, perfection, or immortality. (p. 18)

Participants implied a wish to “transform themselves” through certain “technologies of the self,” such as sport which, as we have seen, requires self-discipline and hard work. Since controlling our bodies is thought of as a duty, it occupies much of our time and energy (Bauman 2005). As Giddens (1991: 178) points out, “The body cannot be any longer merely ‘accepted’, fed and adorned according to traditional ritual; it becomes a core part of the reflexive project of self-identity.” Interestingly, time use surveys include beauty care in the category of personal care, while sport is categorized as a pastime or hobby. Both, I suggest, incorporate bodywork, which, like other “technologies of the self” are aimed at self-improvement, conceived as a means to reach “happiness” and “perfection,” as Foucault suggests, yet they may be felt to be obligatory. At the heart of such practices, is the self-gaze, making the individual constantly aware of discrepancies between the real self and the desirable self. This may mean comparing the self to real others as well as models offered in cultural scripts. From a Foucauldian perspective, certain truths offered in discourses, are taken for granted as correct, these reinforced through the voice of experts. Therefore, despite liberal discourses of individualism and entitlement that promote a sense of freedom and autonomy, free time is regulated by notions of what is thought to be worthy vis a vis the self and time use, thereby encouraging self-surveillance and self-discipline.

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This brings into question the freedom of individuals in the face of discourses and scripts of worthy selfhood that encourage busyness, productivity and hard work, including self-work. On the one hand, the self-project draws on individualism, highlighting agency, personal responsibility, and control as the means and rationale for self-cultivation. On the other hand, perhaps this feeling of agency, understood subjectively as freedom, may mask and sustain disciplinary discourses that call for the adherence to models of desired selves. Even in the realm of free time when we consider ourselves to be free, culture appears to shape not only how we think and act but also what we think about and how we evaluate actions. Disciplined freedom thus manifests itself on two levels. Firstly, individuals feel they must exercise self-discipline in their free time, so as to ensure the optimal utilization of that time and allow for maximal productivity. Secondly, disciplinary mechanisms promote a self-gaze that, in turn, encourages a disciplined self required to constantly monitor and work on the self. Yet, in doing so, individuals feel that their “free” time is a matter of free choice. The above findings may help us understand the paradox discussed in Chapter 2. On the one hand, as we saw, studies show that people have more free time than previous generations, yet research indicates greater feelings of time pressure. Moreover, it may explain the sense of pressure expressed by participants in Chapter 4. As Judy Wajcman (2014) suggests, being “pressed for time,” is due to economic and demographic factors, parenting approaches or consumption,4 as well as “cultural discourses that value action packed lives” (p. 71). This means that free time, too, is more highly valued when filled. Perhaps then, feelings of time pressure result, not only from the multiplicity of duties that are squeezed into everyday time, but also from the numerous “free” time activities, that the individual may feel obligated to perform. This may create a real “time squeeze” however individuals may also feel pressured due to feelings of obligation linked to personal responsibility to manage the self and time. Additionally, the sense of pressure may stem from subjective feelings related to social comparison and the self-gaze promoted by cultural prescriptions of happiness and worth, as the individual constantly assesses and reassesses discrepancies between the real self and the ideal self that is prescribed in cultural scripts. The productive self is thus required to work hard and monitor the self in free time just as it does at work. Free time, it seems, is as much discipline as it is freedom.

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Notes 1. The Talmud is the central text of Jewish law and tradition. 2. It is not just Puritan beliefs, as Weber indicates, but also Jewish sources that view idleness negatively. For example, Ethics of the Fathers, 3:4 says, “One who stays awake at night, or travels alone on the road, and turns his heart to idleness, has forfeited his life.” 3. This is not to say that free time is not spent in the company of others or doing activities for others, as we shall see in the chapter on the Social Self. Rather, definitions of free time focused on time for the self. 4. The impact of parenting approaches and consumption emerged in the findings of the study, and are examined in the next chapter and in Chapter 8.

References Archer, Margaret S. (ed.). 2010. Conversations About Reflexivity. Oxon: Routledge. Bauman, Zygmunt. 2005. Liquid Life. Cambridge, UK and Malden, MA: Polity Press. Bellezza, Silvia, Neeru Paharia, and Anat Keinan. 2017. Conspicuous Consumption of Time: When Busyness and Lack of Leisure Time Become a Status Symbol. Journal of Consumer Research 44 (1): 118–138. Borgmann, Albert. 1993. Crossing the Postmodern Divide. London: The University of Chicago Press. Cronin, Anne M. 2000. Consumerism and ‘Compulsory Individuality’: Women, will and Potential. In Transformations: Thinking Through Feminism, ed. S. Ahmed, J. Kilby, C. Lury, M. McNeil, and B. Skeggs, 273–288. London: Routledge. Daly, Kerry. 1996. Families and Time: Keeping Pace in a Hurried Culture. Thousand Oaks, CA: Sage. Emirbayer, Mustafa, and Ann Mische. 1998. What Is Agency? The American Journal of Sociology 103 (4): 962–1023. Foucault, Michel. 1988. Technologies of the Self: A Seminar with Michel Foucault, ed. Luther H. Martin, Huck Gutman, and Patrick H. Hutton. London: Tavistock. Franklin, Benjamin. [1732] 1997. Autobiography, Poor Richard and Later Writings. New York: Library of America. Gershuny, Jonathan. 2005. Busyness as the Badge of Honor for the New Superordinate Working Class. Social Research 72 (2): 287–314. Giddens, Anthony. 1991. Modernity and Self-Identity: Self and Society in the Late Modern Age. Cambridge: Polity Press.

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Hochschild, Jennifer L. 1995. Facing Up to the American Dream: Race, Class, and the Soul of the Nation. Princeton, NJ: Princeton University Press. Kalberg, Stephen. 1992. Culture and the Locus of Work in Contemporary Western Germany: Weberian Configurational Analysis. In Theory of Culture, ed. R. Munch and Neil J. Smelser, 324–365. Berkeley: University of California Press. Katz, Elihu, Hadassah Haas, Shosh Weitz, Hanna Adoni, Michael Gurevitz, and Miriam Shif. 2000. The Leisure Culture in Israel: Changes in Cultural Behavioral Patterns 1970–1990. Tel Aviv, Open University [Hebrew]. Kelly, John. R. 2009. Work and Leisure: A Simplified Paradigm. Journal of Leisure Research 41 (3): 439–451. McGee, Micki. 2005. Self Help Inc.: Makeover Culture in American Life. New York: Oxford University Press. Nolan, James L. 1998. The Therapeutic State: Justifying Government at Century’s End. New York: New York University Press. Parker, Stanley R. 1976. The Sociology of Leisure. London: Allen and Unwin. Robinson, John P., and Geoffrey Godbey. 1997. Time for Life: The Surprising Ways Americans Use Their Time. University Park: Pennsylvania State University Press. Rose, Nikolas. 1998. Inventing Our Selves: Psychology, Power and Personhood. Cambridge: Cambridge University Press. Roxburgh, Susan. 2006. ‘I Wish We Had More Time to Spend Together…’ The Distribution and Predictors of Perceived Family Time Pressures among Married Men and Women in the Paid Labor Force. Journal of Family Issues 27 (4): 529–553. Schor, Juliet. 1998. The Overspent American: Upscaling, Downshifting, and the New Consumer. New York: Harper Perennial. Sullivan, Oriel. 2008. Busyness, Status Distinction and Consumption Strategies of the Income Rich, Time Poor. Time and Society 17 (1): 5–26. Swidler, Anne. 1986. Culture in Action: Symbols and Strategies. American Sociological Review 51 (2): 273–286. Veblen, Thorstein. [1899] 2007. The Theory of the Leisure Class. New York: Oxford University Press. Vinitzky-Seroussi, Vered. 1998. After Pomp and Circumstance: High School Reunion as an Autobiographical Occasion. Chicago: University of Chicago Press. Wajcman, Judy. 2014. Pressed for Time: The Acceleration of Life in Digital Capitalism. Chicago: University of Chicago Press. Weber, Max. [1930] 1992. The Protestant Ethic and the Spirit of Capitalism, trans. Talcott Parsons. London: Routledge.

CHAPTER 7

The Consuming Self

This section entitled The Consuming Self, devotes two sub-chapters to the examination of various activities related to consumption, with the second focusing exclusively on media consumption. While not all the activities below are necessarily considered leisure, I include them in the examination of free time for a number of reasons. Firstly, in keeping with definitions of free time offered by participants as well as researchers (discussed in Chapter 5), these activities are generally not associated with obligations of work, childcare, or domestic tasks. Secondly, if free time is conceived as a realm of free choice, it is crucial to examine what people choose to do in their uncommitted time and what motivates them to pursue those activities. In addition, we must address the question of why some of these practices are considered to be free time activities, while others are not defined as such. Lastly, since I am interested in how culture works in everyday life, an examination of consumption, particularly of media, is hoped to shed light on cultural repertoires that may provide models of the self and promote certain lifestyles.

The Commercialization of Free Time The first part of this chapter explores questions linked to the centrality of consumption in many free time practices. What motivates the individual to consume goods and services during free time? How are these practices experienced and evaluated? To what extent does consumer culture shape our free time? © The Author(s) 2019 M. Shir-Wise, Time, Freedom and the Self, Leisure Studies in a Global Era, https://doi.org/10.1007/978-3-030-13841-7_7

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Expert Services It is not by chance that this chapter follows the chapter on the Productive Self. We have already seen that certain free time practices may be motivated by their perceived productivity, many of these involving consumption. Sport, for example, was indicated as a means of attaining a desirable body. It is true that some participants reported walking or running as their preferred physical activity, however, the majority reported going to exercise classes, gyms or the local pool, all of which require some form of payment for membership or participation. Moreover, though it did not come up in the interview specifically, from my observations in the town, it appears that sports, such as bicycling or jogging, often incorporate the purchase of special equipment, clothing and accessories or the services of a personal trainer. As we saw in the previous chapter, the consumption of beauty care services, such as cosmeticians or manicurists, like sport, were conceived as a means of managing the body. In addition, almost 70% of participants reported having gone to a hairdresser or barber in the month preceding the interview. Self-management in the form of consumption also included coaching or other self-improvement practices, which were experienced as psychological or spiritual self-cultivation. These practices generally involved experts that provided services and advice. Whether, this expertise related to physical fitness, beauty care, psychology or spiritual development, consumption was perceived as way to attain crucial guidance toward the achievement of a desirable self. We saw that Debra, who attends coaching sessions regularly, relates to the role of her coach, saying, “she very quickly treats and makes progress and things get finished and solved.” In this way, much of the supposed self-work, self-management or self-improvement is not managed by the self, but rather by others. In other words, although the therapeutic discourse emphasizes the individual as being responsible for self-management, s/he turns to external frameworks involving consumption, thereby transferring responsibility to experts who are thought to be knowledgeable in their field of expertise. We have seen that the failure to perform certain activities associated with self-work, was experienced by participants as laziness and a lack of self-discipline. Perhaps then, the resulting sense of inadequacy may make one feel it is a matter of personal responsibility to turn to experts who

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seem better suited to assume the role of management and instruct the individual as to how a desirable self can be attained. Consequently, consumption is thought to be a solution to problems, and it is the individual’s responsibility to pursue it in order to reach certain goals. This may be true of bodywork, including such practices as sport, dieting and beauty care, or supposed self-help practices that actually require external intervention like personal coaching or group training sessions. Since these activities are perceived as necessary for one’s self-management, rather than being thought of as free time, they are simply considered to be one more thing to be squeezed into a heavy schedule. As I have suggested, this may account for the paradox discussed in Chapter 2, that, despite evidence that this generation has more free time than past generations, people still seem to feel more time pressured. On the other hand, contemporary notions of choice and self-realization may contribute to a sense of autonomy and agency so that such activities are conceived, not only as time for the self, but even as empowering. In addition, as we shall see, consumptive practices are also associated with pleasure, self-indulgence and happiness. Shopping Perhaps more than any other activity, shopping is considered to be pure consumption. In the questionnaire, shopping did not relate to supermarket shopping but rather to less regular shopping such as clothes or cosmetics including men’s products. This was intended to move the focus from everyday shopping as a duty, to free time and the self. Findings from the questionnaire indicated close to 70% who reported having shopped for clothes in the month preceding the interview, with almost half of these being men. In addition, more than a third of female participants reported having gone shopping for cosmetics and 40% of all participants reported having spent time in a mall as an outing. The oral interview revealed how participants felt and thought about shopping, with many relating to the activity as enjoyable. It was defined as a free time activity, described as “recreation.” For example, though Beth says she doesn’t have time for shopping, she adds, “but when I do, yes, if I can, definitely, I like it.” She explains that her pleasure comes from the experience of the outing rather than the resulting purchases. She says,

164  M. SHIR-WISE …it can be at the most common market that there is, and it can be at the snobbiest place there is. At the market I’d buy more, at a snobby place I wouldn’t buy because it’s expensive but.. it’s fun walking around looking at beautiful things. Definitely. Yes.

It seems that getting out and seeing different things is experienced as an important part of the outing, which includes “looking” as well as buying. Similarly, for Eden, pleasure is derived from the sights around her, “There’s something fun about looking around, looking at all the color, life.” Her words suggest a sense of liveliness generated by visual stimuli. Yet, like Beth she says, “Now, I don’t have time for it. I mean I go to the mall for something specific, I run in the mall, I take what I need and I leave. Not just walk around, look at things.” Clearly, having time is crucial to experiencing the activity as recreation. That is to say, being free from the constraints of time is an essential ingredient to a feeling of pleasure from shopping. Similarly, when Adina is asked if she likes shopping, she says, “Very much. It doesn’t work out much. No, shopping without pressure is fun. It’s really fun.” Perhaps that is why Denny says he enjoys shopping on holidays. He explains, “I’m relaxed, I’m not under pressure from work that you have to close this, visit mum, and you have to take the kids, bring this child and do…” For him, it is not only the time pressure that can mar the enjoyment from shopping, but also the stress associated with the many duties he feels he is obligated to do when he is not on holidays. In Leah’s view, pleasure from shopping depends on the type of shopping, which is also linked to freedom from commitments. She explains, that is shopping can be divided into the more pleasant (laughs) going to buy clothes, shoes and that. And shopping, again, something that you have to do, all the shopping that has to do with the house… I don’t really like…

Leah contrasts shopping for clothes and shoes with shopping as a duty. The first is perceived as a matter of choice, while the second is thought of as a duty and part of her obligation to others. When shopping is free from commitments, perhaps it is felt to be time for herself. The consumption of clothes or shoes may contribute to this sense of self-indulgence as opposed to shopping for others. Thus, self-investment includes, not only giving oneself time, but also purchasing commodities, a practice that may be experienced as self-empowerment.

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Indeed, buying goods was found to contribute to pleasure from s­hopping. For some it was part of the enjoyment, whereas others considered acquisition to be the main source of pleasure as we see in Vera’s words, “If I already go [shopping], I buy and enjoy myself.. I don’t like walking around.” On the other hand, Ilana enjoys both the recreational experience as well as the actual buying. When asked what she likes about shopping, she replies, “Walking around, seeing the world, seeing people, buying clothes. Buying altogether. Just going out a bit, to get some air as they say.” For Ilana, shopping is experienced as an outing, as a means of getting “some air,” which suggests a change from the confinement of the day-to-day, allowing exposure to different surroundings that may be perceived as “seeing the world.” When asked what she likes about buying she responds, “Renewal, mostly the renewal.” Interestingly, like Leah, she specifies clothes. Perhaps purchasing new clothes is associated with a renewal of the self as suggested by Yaffa’s words, “I like buying myself clothes, I like new things. When I don’t have new clothes it upsets me that I don’t have nice clothes, I feel like I don’t have anything to wear.” Buying new clothes is experienced positively, whereas not having “new clothes” is equated with not having “nice clothes,” which brings about negative feelings. Her words highlight the emphasis of updating, upgrading and renewal in consumer culture, which encourages consumers to constantly consume. Despite stereotypes that link women with shopping, many male participants expressed particular enthusiasm. Erez says, “If I could, for sure, go shopping, all day shopping…I enjoy it, buying clothes, I could buy clothes all day. I enjoy the experience of buying.” When asked what he likes about it he explains, “Don’t know, the feeling you’ve bought something, that you’ve added something, that you’ve brought home something new. You don’t need it, but you’ve brought another something. It’s part of the experience.” As in the above quotes, the word “new” indicates the need for constant consumption. Consuming and the accumulation of goods is presented as contributing to positive feelings, although Erez is aware that it is consumption for its own sake, rather than being a matter of need. He adds that he doesn’t like going shopping with the family because he doesn’t like anyone bothering him or as he puts it, “sitting on my head.” For Erez, being able to shop on his own, without anyone’s interference, is experienced as freedom, which adds to the enjoyment of the activity. For Manny, too, an integral part of the experience is spending money, something he feels he should control.

166  M. SHIR-WISE I’m mad about shopping. I love buying clothes, very much. Though I have controlled myself in recent years but.. yes I used to be able to go into a mall, without any reason, waste a few hundred shekel or a thousand.. at least a thousand without even thinking twice. Yes. I love it.

Manny relates to his consumption as an addiction, which requires self-discipline. The word, “mad” suggests an irrational quality, as does the phrase “without any reason.” Despite the pleasure derived from the activity, Manny defines uncontrolled shopping as a “waste” of money. As with the previous participants, I asked Manny what he likes about shopping, to which he replies, “I like to look good, it, it makes you feel good. It’s a kind of feeling good, renewing something. It’s kind of fun to look good.” Here too, renewal is seen as central and buying new clothes, in particular, is perceived as a means of managing one’s external appearance, which, in turn, generates positive feelings in the consumer. Manny suggests that buying clothes contributes to a desirable appearance, which enhances his self-image. But, perhaps, it is also the feeling that one is investing time and money in the self that gives rise to positive feelings. In other words, consumption is valued as producing results, yet it may also heighten one’s sense of worth by the very fact that the activity is directed toward the self. Spending time and money on the activity is thus perceived as a means of attaining a goal while also indicating the individual’s value, as well as creating a sense of freedom and agency. Unlike Manny’s description of shopping as pleasure, Debra does not present shopping as recreation but rather as a means. She says, “I need an aim. I don’t go to walk around if I don’t need anything.” Yet, like the above, she describes the act of spending as a source of pleasure, adding, “when I buy myself clothes that I like, it’s really fun…spending money altogether, I have decided that that’s something that gives you pleasure.” On the one hand, shopping is presented as fulfilling a set goal. On the other hand, Debra indicates “spending money altogether” as enjoyable in itself. For others, cheap prices were mentioned as central to their enjoyment from shopping. Maddy says, “I love going to cheap places like to … where I get bargains. I like going to the market, stuff like that.” Another, who said she likes shopping but doesn’t have time adds, “One thing’s for sure, if there are sales, I always run to sales.” By getting “bargains,” the consumer may feel that s/he is actually saving money by spending. In this way, it may be conceived as rational consumption, as well as imbuing the activity with a sense of productivity.

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For many, shopping as recreation included the company of others. Some said they use it as an opportunity to meet with friends or family. This usually included walking around as well as the consumption of food in a café or restaurant. Yaron says, “I love shopping, it doesn’t matter if it’s the supermarket… it’s a kind of recreation.” He adds that he likes shopping with his wife which he considers “quality time.” It seems that, for Yaron, shopping is considered to be a worthwhile way of spending time. Similarly, Adina, who also enjoys shopping describes it as, “quality time with the kids, recreation with them.” In this way, it is perceived as worthy since it incorporates the pleasure of the shopping itself, while sharing it with significant others and thereby utilizing time to invest in relationships. Rona describes a fun day at the mall with her daughter saying, “we buy her all sorts..some clothes, a café, whatever she wants. Ice cream.” Her words suggest that the unrestrained acquisition of commodities may be seen as an expression of love as she indulges her daughter, thus transforming this time into quality time. However, others expressed a dislike for shopping, describing it as goal-oriented, the sole purpose of which is purchasing according to intention. Maurice, who says he doesn’t like shopping at all, says, “I go in, buy and leave.” For Yigal, shopping is described as “boring.” He explains, “I don’t go to see what to buy, rather I go to buy… I go to buy something when I have decided beforehand what I want.” This conception of shopping as “mission oriented,” as Eran put it, is linked to productivity. Eran’s view of shopping is, “when you need something and as quick and efficient as possible.” Consumption is presented as a matter of “need” that must be fulfilled in the most effectual manner. For Daniel, the only shopping he likes is going to buy technical devices or sports goods. He explains, But even things like shoes or sporting stuff I will go in there. My aim is to buy 5 pairs of shoes that’s good for the next year, even keep in the cupboard, use one, because I don’t change size anymore and that’s it.

Practicality is central to his shopping behavior. Efficiency and results are indicated as the main considerations, even when it may mean spending more money. This was also evident in Michal’s words. She says she generally doesn’t like shopping, yet she likes one store where she pays,

168  M. SHIR-WISE …a lot of money because she sells designer clothes… I have no idea whether something is nice or not… so S, I trust her. So I go to her and really.. but I, I go to her only if I need. It’s not like I enjoy it. (laughs)

As far as Michal is concerned, shopping is associated with uncertainty. If, as we have said, consumption is linked to the self, then decisions regarding consumption may be perceived as highly significant. Michal is, thus, willing to pay “a lot of money” in order to overcome uncertainty by advising with an expert. Furthermore, here too, the word “need” suggests that consumption is seen as a necessity. Thus Michal’s displeasure from shopping may be due, not only to the sense of inadequacy generated by having to make purchasing decisions, but also since it is conceived as necessity rather than a matter of freedom. The problem of deciding is also raised by Betty who says, I get very tired from the big malls. It exhausts me and I’m bad at making decisions. It’s always hard for me to decide fast and it’s even more confusing so I prefer to go to small shopping centers more like boutiques.

When asked what she means by “confusing,” she explains, “That there is so much choice and I don’t know anymore what I need and want.” Betty implies that the exposure to “so much choice” may lead consumers into believing that they need to buy, as well as confusing them regarding their personal preferences. Perhaps she feels that shopping requires a skill that she lacks. For her, the solution is expert advice from girlfriends. She says, … and if big places I prefer to walk around with someone that, let’s say there are those girlfriends who you know are good at shopping? So you choose them to come shopping with you. (laughs)

This lack of confidence in one’s own decision-making was also expressed by Maddy, who says she gets “irritated” when shopping for herself. She tries to account for this saying, “Because I never know what exactly I want or what I like and so I can’t decide and I am not very good at decisions I think, but I like buying for the kids.” It is taken for granted that deciding means buying. The difficulty of the decision seems to lie in the fact that consumers do not always know what they want. But it may also be due to the perceived implications of the purchase. Since consumption is seen as a means of achieving a desirable self, one’s decisions concerning the purchase, may be perceived as affecting one’s very identity. Interestingly,

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a number of female participants said they prefer shopping for their children than for themselves. Possibly this is because such decisions are not associated with anxiety about the self. As we have seen, many of those who perceived shopping as goaloriented did not describe shopping as enjoyable. Some participants expressed a distinct aversion to the activity, using strong language to voice how they felt. For Ofrah, it is considered a necessity to shop for clothes, which, in her eyes, are nothing but a social requirement, experienced as a burden. I can’t stand malls and I hate all the.. really don’t like it. If it was up to me, the absolute truth, really, really, it’s no shoes, baggy pants…if I could live in that sort of setting? Go up to some hilltop and live.

As far as Ofrah is concerned, she has no choice other than conforming to what is socially acceptable. The only possible solution, in her view, is to escape her present surroundings and live in a place without such expectations. The word “hilltop” suggests cutting herself off from society. Social expectations may include, not only the goal and results of shopping, but also the actual act of shopping. Neta feels she is considered deviant since she hates malls. She says, “Malls, I loathe. When you send me to a mall I suffer…I buy when I need…I’m told I’m not normal… My daughter has learned that she has a strange mother (laughs).” For Neta, shopping is a “need,” not an enjoyable activity as she believes others may experience it. She explains, “I can’t stand malls, the noise, the commotion. So if I shop, then I never go to a mall, I do it in other places.” Oren too, uses the term “can’t stand it.” Like Neta, he says he shops according to need. I can’t stand it. When I’m alone, let’s say overseas then I do a lot but I do it alone so I know exactly, I know what I need, I go into the mall, take and leave. Don’t walk around there for 6 hours. I can’t stand that.

Being alone may give Oren a sense of control to pursue a set goal. He knows “exactly” what he needs and his shopping is strictly directed toward the goal. Again, the word “need,” clarifies his perception of shopping as a necessity, thus he leaves as soon as he has achieved his goal. Referring to his wife and daughters, he says he leaves them, “I can’t..it drives me crazy, also that slow walking, it tires me more than seven hours of

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squash.” For him, the purposelessness of walking around is experienced as exhausting, as we see from his comparison to strenuous sport. Besides going shopping in malls or shops, some participants also used the Internet to shop for commodities such as toys, clothes, electronics and food but also for free time activities. Many mentioned checking deals that are sent by email, as part of their daily free time routine and as an opportunity to purchase goods and services at special prices. For example, Yaffa says she saw a “very worthwhile price” for coupons for Segway, which she then passed onto friends. The exposure to what is seen as “worthwhile” deals, prompts the consumer to consume even when the purchase was not intended. Yaron says, “If there’s a special, why not? I will go and buy it. What’s good is that it doesn’t limit you to a purchase over 100 shekel so I don’t have to go and waste money unnecessarily.” Yaron suggests that this kind of shopping prevents wasting money and may be perceived as saving money. Interestingly, none of the ­ participants called these emails advertisements. Rather, receiving such promotions was presented as a matter of choice and as a means of access to s­ pecial offers. Erez says, “Sometimes I save it because I say oh, that’s something I need.” For Erez, the consumption of certain goods or services is considered necessary, so that saving coupons is seen as useful. By being exposed to various commodities, the consumer may be led to believe that s/he needs them. Rona is aware of this influence on her consumption. She describes the consequence of her exposure to such emails saying, “I get Groupon, so from time to time it tempts me to buy all sorts of things that.. I think, otherwise, I wouldn’t get.” The word “tempts” highlights the way in which such advertisements entice the consumer to consume. Exposure to commodities on the Internet, as in malls, may thus encourage consumers to make unintended purchases. She gives examples of coupons that she has purchased for a variety of uses including for a chiropractor, painting lessons and “something for her cat.” Even when one does not make a purchase, the exposure to various types of goods and services may generate a sense of want as we see in Maddy’s words. Talking about coupons for holidays, she says, “…of course you sit there, like whether you do it or not it’s a separate issue, but it definitely makes you think I really would love a holiday.” In this way, the consumer is motivated toward consumption, whether it be of goods or services, as these are perceived as either necessary or as attractive and thus worth having or doing. It was not only the Internet that was indicated as having an effect on ­consumption and free time. The print media, as well as television and

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movies, were mentioned as influencing people’s desires for consumption, whether fulfilled or not. Yaron points to the various types of exposure saying, When you open the paper and you see a deal to Spain or something like that and you have free time, you say great, wow…So I think media definitely.. you see movies, you.. all sorts of nature programs, all sorts of programs about places in the world and it really makes you want to go to travel there. It does have an influence on your free time.

His words suggest that media may shape both conceptions and actions. The influence is described as extensive as it may affect the types of commodities and services that the individual consumes as well as shaping conceptions of what is worth pursuing. For example, Debra, who goes to coaching sessions, says she started after having read an article about a celebrity who went to that particular coach. Erez, however is wary of the influence of the media, thus he attempts to resist the effect of television advertisements by “flicking” between channels, yet he says he still wants to buy everything he sees in ads. Television images may thus present consumption as a means to happiness. Relating to a program about rich women, called Meusharot, Vera says she “would take a few things from there.” The Hebrew name of the program is a play on words, meaning both rich and happy, though spelt differently. The implication is that wealth leads to happiness. She says that, as on the program, she would like to take her “girlfriends and go for a week’s holiday. Not be bothered by money and not by time.” Constraints of money and time are presented as an obstacle to certain consumptive practices that are associated with happiness. Pam, who has recently retired, mentions the influence of a movie she had seen on her decision to retire and on how she now uses her time. She says, I wanted to stop working, that is I made myself a list, yeh? A bucket list. I saw that movie and I said.. it really had a great effect on me. I said, I also want, I’ll prepare things, things that I can do today I’ll do today, I won’t put them off…

Pam, who later adds, “live the present,” implies that the movie has conveyed a dual message: that time must be filled, and that the satisfaction of desires should not be delayed, both central ideas in consumer culture. Thus, even when the message is not specifically a call for consumption, the underlying themes of consumer discourse may still be internalized.

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Outings As we have seen, participants who related to shopping as recreation, often incorporated cafes or restaurants in the outing. Eating out was perceived as contributing to the sense of enjoyment when spending time in a mall, as well as being a popular activity in itself. Indeed, 84% of participants reported having gone to cafes or restaurants in the month before the interview. These outings were not infrequent or reserved for special occasions. Participants reported going to restaurants or cafes as regular activities on which they spent an average of 2 hours. Other free time outings included going to the cinema and the theater, both of which almost half the participants reported having done in the month preceding the interview. The average time spent on these outings was between 2 to 2 and a half hours. When asked which activities are considered pleasure, Efrat replies, “going to a movie is pleasure,” Debra says, “I really love movies” and Beth refers to “a good movie, eating in a good restaurant.” The repetition of the word “good” suggests that quality may be perceived as being an integral part of the experience of pleasure. For Yaron, movies and plays are considered to be his favorite pastime. These outings were also mentioned by many participants when describing weekend routines. They were often shared with one’s spouse, as Debra says, “We try to go to movies…about once a week or every two weeks.” The word “try” suggests that it was considered worth making an effort. Such outings were thought of as a desirable way to spend time with one’s spouse, thus deserving the investment of both time and money. For example, some said they have a subscription to movies or plays to ensure they go. Liron reports going with his wife to movies on Saturday nights, saying, “We like seeing a lot of movies. I like plays less, although we have a subscription… they have some sort of quality I.. they’re too slow for me.” Interestingly, Liron’s words suggest that going to the theater is higher culture than going to the cinema, yet he still prefers movies, saying he likes, “drama, Israeli movies, stories, everything.” For others, the content is not what appeals to them, but the fact that it is an outing. Alon explains, “It’s not the movie that gets me out, it’s the outing, the popcorn.” For Alon, the whole experience of the outing is what motivates him to go. Yaffa indicates the convenience of going to movies and cafes as part of the appeal for her. She explains simply that she and her husband go because, “one of the most available things is coffee and a

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movie.” She sees it as an opportunity for an outing that does not require organizing. We shall see, in the chapter on the Family Self, that the shared consumption of leisure is equated with romance (Illouz 1997). Going out with one’s spouse was considered important, and many indicated going to a movie or restaurant as a way to celebrate special occasions. In addition, participants mentioned having a massage or going to a spa or holiday on birthdays or anniversaries. Relating to wedding anniversaries, Rona says that she and her husband usually have a massage and go to a restaurant. Celebrating the event thus requires investing time and money, which may be perceived as a means of cultivating the couple relationship. Drinking wine in good restaurants, spas, or weekend getaways were associated with romance and as such, deemed a worthy way of spending free time. Imagined Consumption: What Would You Do If…? As we saw in Chapter 5, in order to gain a deeper understanding of what participants experienced as constraining their free time, they were asked a number of hypothetical questions. These related to what they believe to be missing in their free time either because of time pressure or monetary considerations. As I have said, asking participants to imagine possibilities, was hoped to shed light on what may be conceived as the ideal way to spend free time when one is not limited by either time or money. When asked what they would do if they had more free time, many participants indicated consumption as central. For instance, Betty replied, “I would, first of all go, put more time into going out which I think is.. for the soul and the intellect. That would give me a lot of pleasure… theatre, concerts, I like a lot.” For Betty, cultural consumption is considered to be spiritually and mentally valuable, and experienced as pleasure. When asked what she would do if she had time for herself, she says, “go walk around the flea market…it’s full of life, with cafes… very interesting shops.” As we have seen, shopping, even though it may not include purchases, is nevertheless indicated as an exposure to the vibrancy of various commodities and cafes. Similarly, Beth responds saying, “Tel Aviv…shops, market, museums… and come back in the afternoon with a feeling that I have seen the world.” Shopping, movies and cafes were indicated by other participants as a way they would use their time if they had time for themselves. These responses bring to mind Benjamin’s flaneur, who strolls through urban streets in a leisurely fashion, as he takes in the sights

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(Benjamin 1935/1997). It seems that the colorful, lively quality of sites of consumption are experienced as cosmopolitan, and when unencumbered by time pressure or monetary constraints, the individual may feel a sense of freedom. For Alon, the idea of possible time for himself is pictured in a ­different way. He says, “Go have a massage Maybe. But anything quiet and indulging.” Consumption, is seen as a way to invest in the self, where indulgence is associated with relaxation. Leah, includes her ­husband saying, “I would book a day of pampering for S [her husband] and me, go to a spa and then to a restaurant and spend a day like that in a hotel with a spa and a restaurant.” As we shall see in the chapter on the Family Self, when examining free time use among couples, consumption was integral to what was conceived as an ideal way to spend time with one’s spouse. Holidays, too, as indicated in Chapter 5, emerged as a highly valorized commercialized form of leisure mentioned by participants when asked what they would do if they had more free time. In particular, most referred to a desire to travel overseas more often and for longer periods. When asked what they would do with their time if money were not a consideration, many indicated trips and holidays as their desired way to use this imagined money. Yaron is quite passionate about his wish, saying, “I would go for a year’s trip around the world, my wife the kids…I wish, I wish, I wish. It’s a wet dream.” Many of those who indicated traveling as their wish, included their spouses and children in this fantasy. Dana is very specific about the kind of trip she envisages. She says, “I would go skiing now with the kids…we would go on more holidays also the two of us alone.” Others referred to friends as their desired companions for their imagined trip. Manny, like Dana, expresses a desire to go skiing, though he wishes to go with friends. Efrat talks of buying a house, “in the Alps or..maybe go there for a month or two a year.” This freedom from monetary constraints is ideated as a means to get away and have a vacation at a desirable destination for extended periods. As we saw in the mayor’s words in Chapter 3, the wish for vacations may be magnified by social pressure, “Because the community isn’t big, it’s small and people talk you know, this one came back from a trip and this one went on a trip, and this one’s going on a trip.” Many participants indicated personal enrichment courses as their preferred way to spend this imagined free time. As we saw in Chapter 5, these included extended courses requiring payment, often costly.

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For example, when asked what he would do if he had more time, Alon says he would go study or go to exercise class while Yaron says he would like to improve his swimming. Many, like Yehudit, indicated a wide range of activities saying, I‘d like to see the world…Maybe do more studies, maybe, courses for the fun of it..I love Israeli music. If I had the money, I would go to a lot of concerts. I would go like more to culture, whether it’s concerts, plays, so shows…

For Yehudit, the consumption of culture is considered worthy yet it requires money. In this way, money is conceived as a prerequisite for consumption, which is linked to pleasure and happiness. Besides mentioning trips, courses and outings, many participants said they would put money into home renovations or purchase a bigger home. Some said they would buy another car. This type of consumption, though perhaps not free time practices, may still be linked to conceptions of a desirable self, much like other forms of consumption described by participants. In other words, certain consumption practices, may be perceived as a means of attaining an ideal self largely in keeping with cultural scripts promoted by consumer culture. Discussion These findings support previous research that suggests that much of our free time involves consumption (Gershuny 2000). Consumption emerged as central to many activities associated with pleasure as well as self-management and enrichment. This is not surprising, since consumer culture encourages consumption, by promising the gratification of desires, presenting it as a solution for a variety of problems and as a path to happiness (discussed in Chapter 2). Not only do the above findings reveal consumption as central, but they are also crucial in helping us understand major issues that I address in the book. Why are some practices perceived as enjoyable or worthy? How are they linked to the self and happiness and what is the role of culture in shaping conceptions? Lastly, how free is the individual during “free” time? While shopping may be most commonly associated with consumption, my findings suggest that a large proportion of free time activities involve consumption in some way or another. Consuming goods and

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services was considered worthwhile, whether regarded as enjoyable or as goal-oriented. Shopping, for example, was described by some as “recreation,” while others saw it as a task that must be fulfilled in order to achieve results. Being exposed to an abundance of commodities was described as visually stimulating, as “seeing the world,” an opportunity to “look around at beautiful things” and “color.” The wider the variety of goods, the greater the sense of choice for the consumer. The acquisition of commodities, as opposed to just looking around, is associated with “renewal” and positive feelings. Moreover, when the activity is enjoyed without external constraints, the experience is enhanced, and consumption is thus felt to be an exercise of individual choice. However, as we saw, having to choose when faced with a plenitude of options, may also bring about a sense of uncertainty particularly when decisions are thought to have implications on the self. In addition, as Barry Schwartz (2004) points out, a plethora of choices, whether of goods or services, contributes, not only to anxiety, but also to time pressure brought about by the efforts involved before, during and after decisions are made. This includes cognitive strain such as deliberation preceding the purchase or regret following it. Consumers may turn to experts or other sources in the hope of making well-informed decisions regarding consumption. Besides the duality of positive and negative feelings generated by consumption practices, motives were indicated as twofold, namely pleasure and goals. Consumption was found to be an essential ingredient of many pastimes described as pleasurable. These included entertainment and culture, culinary pleasures, or “pampering” oneself with massages or vacations. Indeed, as discussed in Chapter 2, consumerism is associated with the gratification of desires. Bauman (2005) suggests that the consumerist syndrome, which denies the delay of satisfaction, has replaced the productivist syndrome. Challenging this claim, I suggest that it contradicts the above findings. How can we account for the goal-oriented consumption invested in the self-project as indicated by participants? It seems to me, that many of the self-improvement practices indicated by participants, require, not only the delay of gratification, but also long term investment and hard work, both central to discourses of productivity, as we saw in the previous chapter. Rather than replacing the “productivist syndrome” as Bauman suggests, consumption practices may reflect both the hedonistic imperative of self-indulgence as well as discourses of productivity and therapeutic self-management, aimed at achieving results. At

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the heart of both is the self. On the one hand, consumption is directed toward self-gratification and pleasure. On the other hand, the consumer is called upon to manage the self. Consumption is presented as being the key to a desirable self, and happiness “is the absolute reference of the consumer society” (Baudrillard 1998: 49). Hence, besides promoting the idea of consumption as renewal or hedonistic pleasure, consumer culture holds the individual responsible for the attainment of happiness and a worthy self, which calls for continual consumption. Yet, cultural scripts of happiness and worthy selfhood may foster a sense of inadequacy in the individual, who is encouraged to consume goods and services that promise results. As Kasser (2004: 55) aptly puts it, “people are bombarded with powerful, psychologically sophisticated proclamations that the good life is ‘the goods life.’” This means that happiness is thought to be attainable through consumption, whether it be by consuming commodities such as home products or clothes, or through the expert guidance of paid sports trainers or spiritual coachers. Consumer culture promotes a self-gaze that encourages constant comparison with ideal models defined by discourses as worthy, or presented in the media as desirable. Tools of consumer culture, such as advertisements, present the acquisition of goods as a path to happiness, a solution to problems and a means of self-transformation (McGee 2005; Pollay 1986). Still, as we have said, consumption is associated with choice, thereby preserving the myth of freedom and agency. In other words, consumer culture draws on individualistic values of autonomy and choice, which create an illusion of freedom. I suggest that much consumption is used as a mechanism to help overcome anxiety and a sense of inadequacy in the hope to bring the consumer closer to cultural models perceived as desirable. So, on the one hand, these practices, whether aimed at pleasure or self-work, are experienced as a matter of individual choice. Yet, though they are thought of as free, in the sense that the individual is free to choose, the self-gaze may magnify perceived discrepancies between ideal selves and real selves so that consumption is motivated by an inner compulsion to achieve a worthy self. Put differently, it is a disciplined freedom, as consumer culture disciplines individuals by creating a sense of need, while disguising the disciplinary nature of consumption as agency, freedom and choice. This may explain why some participants did not define certain consumption practices as free time. In addition, the feeling of time pressure that was described by participants in

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Chapter 4, may be better understood in the light of the above findings. If consumption practices are thought of as necessary in order to attain a desirable self, then, though individualistic discourses present them as choice and self-empowerment, they may nevertheless be experienced as yet another task to be fit into one’s busy schedule. Lastly, cultural prescriptions for happiness and selfhood may perpetuate the desire for more and more, so that one is already dreaming about the next, more exciting, more exotic vacation as soon as one gets back from the first (Campbell 1987). Cultural scripts may promote bodywork involving consumption, such as participation in sports or dieting groups, just as they may encourage investing in relationships by going to spas or fancy restaurants, as we shall see in the chapter on the Family Self. The next part of this chapter examines a dominant part of free time that may be significant in the internalization of cultural models of worthy selfhood, namely media consumption.

Media and Free Time Since this section is the second part of the Consuming Self, I begin by clarifying why I include it here, followed by an explanation of why media consumption merits an entire chapter. Media consumption is much like the consumption of services or culture that, though they may not necessarily be tangible, are consumed by the individual, and generally involve a form of payment. Moreover, as we saw in the previous section of this chapter, much of our consumption practices are designed to attain and maintain a self in keeping with ideal models. These ideals appear in various media, which promote consumption directly and indirectly. When we consume popular media, we are exposed to cultural scripts that play an integral role in shaping conceptions of self as well as defining what is worthy and what is not, including how we spend our free time. Indeed, the participants of the study pointed to the ways in which media exposure influences consumption and users’ conceptions of what is worth pursuing. Advertisements, for example, promote consumption directly whereas media models may encourage consumption indirectly. Irrespective of the medium, whether it be television or Internet, we are constantly bombarded with images that present models of worthy selfhood and lifestyle. Media scripts may encourage consumption through ads that offer products, which tempt the potential consumer, but also by defining what is correct and true in discursively constituted “information.”

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I devote an entire chapter to the use of media technology for a number of reasons. Firstly, television viewing and the use of computers and cellphones were indicated as the most dominant free time activities. Media technology was reported to be used on a regular basis as well as filling a large amount of free time. Secondly, the ubiquity of electronic devices and their increasing mobility means that their use is likely to continue to rise. Hence it is crucial to gain a deeper understanding of the meanings attached to this dominant part of contemporary life. Thirdly, media use is often stigmatized, being associated with wasting time or defined as low culture, and much of the literature links it to negative implications. I therefore focus here, not only on what and how much, but also on why and how. I am interested in what motivates the individual to spend time using various modes of media and how media use is evaluated. Lastly, since, as we have said, the media serve as a source of knowledge, which is likely to shape conceptions of the self and happiness, it is essential to grasp, not only the extent of exposure to cultural scripts but also what meaning they have for consumers of media. Although free time is often associated with exciting activities or outings, the present findings indicate that the bulk of everyday free time was, in fact, spent in the private domain, performing activities that are routinized and generally not highly valorized. Results of the questionnaires revealed that almost all participants watched television and used computers daily in their free time. Television viewing was found to be the most time-consuming of media practices with participants indicating a wide range of programs. News was the most popular, followed by reality TV and drama series, all being reported as regular activities done once or twice a week (see Table 5.2 in Chapter 5). Some participants indicated that they watched alone, while most shared this activity with a spouse or with other family members. As in most time use studies, media use was indicated as dominating free time, both in terms of time spent, as well as frequency. Yet the quantitative data regarding these activities, did not uncover the subjective perspectives of participants. The oral interview thus added valuable insight into the participants’ experience of media use. How do they feel about these practices? What motivates their behavior? How is media consumption evaluated by participants? In what way are their experiences of media use linked to conceptions of time, freedom and the self? This chapter addresses these questions, illuminating the motives and meanings attached to media practices as well as their perceived worth.

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Television Perhaps the most interesting findings relating to media consumption were those concerning television viewing. Firstly, the very fact that it emerged as dominant and time-consuming despite the dramatic increase in the use of alternative media technology was surprising in itself. Considering the widespread use of personal laptops, tablets and smartphones, one would expect the popularity of television to have declined. Although television viewing has been given less and less attention among social scientists since research peaked in the last quarter of the twentieth century (Fiske 1987; Gitlin 1986; Silverstone 1994; Williams 1974), the current findings indicated television viewing as the most popular free time activity among the participants of the study, this supporting time use surveys worldwide (referred to in Chapters 2 and 3). The question is why does it continue to be so? What motivates people to watch and how do they feel about the practice? Secondly, more than any other activity described by participants, watching television emerged as paradoxical. On the one hand, as we have seen, it was indicated as being enjoyable or relaxing. On the other hand, it was negatively evaluated, even by the very participants who described it as positive. This equivocal nature of participants’ expressions demands a deeper examination of subjective perceptions regarding the activity. The following delineates the television habits of the participants and presents how they felt about their viewing, shedding light on the appeal of the activity and possible motives for spending so much time in front of television. Routine and Transition For the large majority of participants, watching television was part of their everyday routine. When participants described how they spent the day preceding the interview, or a typical weekday, television was mentioned as part of the daily routine, often following dinner, sport, or childcare duties. Participants described it as a matter of habit that does not involve active decision-making. Some reported watching “whatever’s on.” Others simply indicated a specific timeslot for viewing. One participant says, “The day ends with some TV program.” Watching television is thus presented by many as part of the evening routine, much like dinner or other daily activities. For some, it was part of a pre-sleep ritual.

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Yasmin attempts to explain the habitual practice of sitting down and watching whatever is on, indicating the passivity and accessibility of the practice as well as her own state at the time. I watch TV, not to.. come and sit down because there is some, oh, there’s a series so I have to sit down. Not for that..because I don’t have patience for anything else.. it’s easy, it’s available, it’s simple, light, it’s not.. it doesn’t require anything. Because by the time I get to it, I don’t feel like doing anything else.

For Yasmin, who expresses a sense of time pressure throughout the interview, not only is watching television experienced as “easy” but it also takes place at a time of day when her energy levels are depleted after meeting the many demands of work in and out of the home. Thus, the ease with which the activity can be pursued and performed makes it particularly well suited to her needs at the end of a hard day. Watching television was indicated as a transition from day-to-day duties to free time. Television was presented as marking a shift from work, whether paid or unpaid, to a time of day that is devoted to leisure. Oren, father of 5, says his free time begins, between 10 and 12 p.m., when he sits down to watch television after having finished duties such as preparing sandwiches for school and bathing the children. Similarly, Yardena, 52 year-old, primary school teacher sees it as a form of relaxation that ushers her into the sphere of free time. Relating to a police series she watches after work, she says, “For me watching an episode, lying in the lounge room, is rest. I don’t need to sleep… it’s like the transition from the workday to the home day…It’s a kind of therapy, a kind of transition, rest.” For Yardena, watching television is both a physical and psychological form of relaxation that distinguishes between the public and the private domains, and serves as a transition between committed time and free time. Although most participants did not explicitly specify this distinction, the fact that television viewing was mentioned as an activity following committed practices seems to suggest that it was experienced as a transformative means for the individual to cross over into the realm of free time. But why television? People could just as easily pursue other activities as a transition into free time. What is the appeal of television viewing and how was it experienced by the participants of the study? Perhaps its appeal lies in its freedom from making decisions or investing effort, not only in the activity itself, but also in the organization of

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the activity. Furthermore, in light of what participants expressed about their sense of time pressure and feelings of obligation to perform ­certain practices, it seems that television viewing may be conceived as f­reedom from constant busyness. As we saw in Chapter 6, productivity and busyness were highly valorized by participants. Being committed to a Productive Self who is expected to utilize every moment can be exhausting, so that an activity such as television viewing that is not subject to those requirements, may be positively experienced as a form of escape. Switching on Is “Switching Off” Indeed, television viewing was described as a chance to unwind, or as many participants put it, to “switch off.” The conception of the activity as relaxing was found to be the most salient quality associated with watching television. Beth, 50-year-old nurse and mother of 4 says, “I watch TV as part of relaxation.” She continues by explaining what she means by relaxation, “No, it’s to rest from the race of the day-to-day. Just sitting and you don’t have to think too much and you just let your brain go into the nonsense of TV and that’s.. it’s great.” In contrast to the emphasis on busyness that we saw in Chapter 6, it seems that the appeal of television lies precisely in its inactivity, or as Adina, 51-year-old interior designer, mother of 5 says, “it just lets you do nothing, enjoyable.” These quotes suggest that doing nothing is experienced here as positive, as “great” or “enjoyable.” It allows both physical and mental rest as the viewer watches, “lying” or “sitting” promoting rest for the body as well as respite from the mental stress of day-to-day life, when the “nonsense of TV ” enables a break from thinking “too much.” Participants presented the relaxing nature of the activity as diametrically opposed to committed time, which was associated with pressure. While work or domestic duties were experienced as busyness, overload and stress, watching television was described as inactivity, pleasure or relaxation. Participants perceived it as an opportunity to free the brain and the body from activities that require effort, thus allowing a sense of freedom from stress. As we saw above, part of the attraction was the conception of effortlessness, which was presented as contributing to relaxation. On the one hand, many programs, as we shall see, were denigrated by participants as low quality thus linking television with negative associations. Yet here, the simple nature or the “nonsense” of the program was indicated as facilitating the ability to switch off, making it positive. Talking about a series

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she likes to watch, Ilana says, “not the most brilliant series but it relaxes me a lot…I watch in order to free myself…you don’t have to break your head at 9.30 at night and try to understand what they want from you.” Her tone is somewhat apologetic as she justifies the low quality of the program as a means to “free” herself. Itai, 47-year-old security officer, father of 3, indicates the stupidity of a program as an advantage rather than a flaw saying, “If it’s a stupid movie that doesn’t require thinking, it clears your head.” It seems that programs that are conceived as lower quality, are not just passively accepted but may even be sought out for their ability to relax and “clear the head.” This perception of television viewing as a means of escape sharpens the distinction between committed time and free time. So, while a wide array of duties are associated with time pressure and a sense of overload, as we saw in Chapter 4, watching TV is experienced as free time. In keeping with participants’ definitions of free time, the individual is free from external constraints and the negative feelings accompanying them. At the same time, the viewer is free to sit and do nothing. Perhaps this positive feeling of relaxation is enhanced by one’s sense of freedom. When you are not constrained by external commitments, you envisage yourself as free. Watching television was presented as one pastime when it is acceptable and legitimate to be unproductive. Rather than being thought of as goal-oriented, as we have seen, it is associated with doing nothing. Yet as Ofrah suggests, this time must be uninterrupted and untainted by committed time, if it is to be defined free time. She says, “Free time is watching a series on TV without anything interrupting me.” Moreover, when not combined with committed duties, watching television is experienced as pleasure. For example, Leah mother of 4 described it as enjoyable when she watches without folding washing. On the one hand, when combined with another activity, watching television was considered more productive, as we have seen in the chapter on the Productive Self. On the other hand, to be enjoyed as a free time activity and experienced as freedom from duties, it must be pure or undisturbed. Perhaps this freedom is interpreted as having time for oneself as Erez suggests, “it’s a kind of moment when I feel that I have taken time for myself, some relaxation time.” The idea of escape emerged as both a motive and a result. The use of the term “switch off,” accentuates the sense of freedom from commitment, as the viewer is able to enter another world where the burdens of

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everyday life are forgotten, where one “can just sit there and watch it. Switch off from everything.” Indeed, when pondering the appeal of television, some participants described it as an escape into another world, conceived as a positive aspect of television viewing. Interestingly, participants indicated various genres as a form of escapism. Maddy, 43, psychologist and mother of 5, refers to a drama series that she likes, saying that for her it is, Kind of escaping like you get into someone else’s life and you see, you see obviously different things than what you, you know, the type of people who are around you, but also, you know, you follow somebody else’s stories.

For Maddy, the program serves as a window into another world. By becoming involved in the stories, she feels she can escape everyday reality. Daniel, who likes action movies, explains what motivates him to watch, saying, All the things you can’t do in real life, totally escapism, to me watching movies is about escaping. I want something totally non-related to reality or as much non-related as I can. That’s why I don’t like Grey’s Anatomy, Private Practice, all those real shows where people die and terrible things happen, there is enough of that in real life. Even though the movies I watch are much more graphic, blood spilling everywhere and guns, you know it’s tomato sauce and not real anyway.

The appeal of action movies for Daniel is in their diversion from real life. For him drama series that revolve around medical or legal issues are too realistic whereas the sense of escapism when watching action movies is experienced as freedom. He continues, That’s in a sense also freedom, completely unrelated things that can’t possibly exist or you don’t know if they exist. Just in the mind of someone who made a movie and you are going into that. Escapism I would use the word I don’t know if that’s freedom but that’s why I like the movies I watch.

For Daniel, watching “things that can’t possibly exist,” is what allows a sense of escape, which is experienced as a feeling of freedom.

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Information, Enjoyment and Emotional Release This is not to say that the only perceived motive and result of television viewing was escape. It also emerged as informative or entertaining as well as cathartic. In addition, some participants indicated psychological interest or identification as the prime motive for watching certain programs. Many participants suggested that television was a source of information. Not only were documentaries, investigative programs and the news indicated as informative but so too were a wide range of other genres. For example, cooking or history shows, were valued as “things that you can learn from.” Even reality shows, as we shall see, while not explicitly indicated as informative, were thought of as contributing to psychological insight. One participant mentioned a local comedy show as a source of information, saying, “By the way, it’s embarrassing to say but everything in politics that’s happening-I know only from Matzav Hauma, a satirical show, and Eretz Nehederet.” Her tone, as Ilana’s above, is apologetic. She is, perhaps, embarrassed to confess that she feels that a comedy show contributes to her knowledge of current affairs. Generally, however, comedies were described as entertaining and as a means for comic relief. Erez says he watches sitcoms repeatedly describing the practice as such, “It’s funny. It’s sitting, you don’t have to think. Sitting and smiling. It empties your head completely.” For Erez, the comic relief brings about positive feelings by making him smile, but also by generating a sense of mental release. Others indicated music shows, such as The Voice, or other reality shows like Masterchef, as enjoyable. As we shall see in the chapter on the Family Self, these were often described as family viewing time. However, besides enjoying the music or the cooking, participants indicated an interest in the personal stories incorporated into the programs. For Michal, watching television, particularly reality shows, serves as food for thought as she identifies with certain characters and the dilemmas they face. Referring to a music reality show she explains, …that isn’t exactly a high standard, there too. I look at people. I actually admire them. I say, wow, how are they willing and.. For example, I don’t have that at all. I wouldn’t be able to do what they do.

Although she describes the program as not being “a high standard,” clearly self conscious about the quality of her viewing habits, Michal experiences her watching of the program as more than passive viewing.

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For her, it serves as a trigger for contemplation about more meaningful matters pertaining to the self. It seems that the very nature of reality shows, which imply reality, may stimulate self-examination among viewers. As opposed to drama series or movies, whose very attraction is the escape from reality, the appeal of this genre is its supposed genuineness. Ilana describes how she is drawn to Big Brother, saying, I‘ve noticed one thing. Even if I don’t sit down to watch, if it’s on and I pass, I will be drawn to it. There’s something that’s real about it, it’s not fake, that.. draws me to it.

Ilana’s attraction to the authenticity of the characters and the situation, bring about a feeling of identification with the characters as she, like Michal, wonders how she would act in their place, “And you also really see..you see people who, I’m not sure that if I was there, I wouldn’t end up doing that.” The identification of the viewer with characters on the screen may also serve as cathartic when personal stories, generally presented as Cinderella stories, involve the viewer emotionally. Participants related to the dramatic stories of characters on reality TV as affective. Referring to the musical show The Voice, Dana says she enjoys the music, yet the emotive appeal is indicated as equally important for her. She says, “Yes, yes, it moves me. I cry a lot in all these shows. With all these personal stories, I cry. Yes. I admit it.” Again the confessional tone of the participant is apparent in the words, “I admit it,” indicating a certain embarrassment regarding the emotional effect the program has on her. She explains, “it’s nice to see people who were given a chance to develop.” The supposed authenticity of reality television may intensify positive feelings related to what may be conceived as real life happy endings. When a program revolves around children, the reaction is all the more potent. Denny describes the cathartic effect of watching a young talent show called School of Music, saying, “you hear the kids’ moving singing, I shed a tear, my wife sheds a tear, my daughter sheds a tear and everyone takes a tissue.” The emotional response is undoubtedly intensified by the presence of other members of the family who, besides being touched by the children’s singing, are also affected by each other’s display of emotion. In addition to the personal involvement with characters, a sense of collective identification emerged among participants who indicated the programs Hatufim and it’s American version, Homeland, as “a kind of

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current affairs that we live in” or “part of Israeli experience.” Both series that emerged as popular among the participants of the study, describe the kidnapping of Israeli soldiers, events experienced as significant in the collective memory of Israeli viewers. Leah explains, “We have also been through it.. I don’t know, so like what’s it like, what have they gone through, like I saw it.. felt that.. maybe it’s funny to say but it’s important for me to see it.” Her words convey a need to understand and empathize with the victims, so that viewing is perceived as more than simply entertainment, but rather as a means to identify and acknowledge the heroes’ suffering and sacrifice for the sake of the country. Yet, the personal interest was also indicated as part of the appeal, evident in the words of another participant who says, “It’s first of all very powerful. And there’s a lot about relationships. I’m very interested in the topic of relationships and people and how things work.” This psychological aspect was associated with other programs, such as the medical series, House. Denny, who says he loves watching the program clarifies, “not for the medical things. I’m more interested in the dynamics with people and how it affects and how he thinks a step before them. That’s what’s interesting.” When relating to reality TV, particularly Big Brother, psychological understanding emerged as a central motive for watching. Ofrah explains her attraction saying, I really love watching reality. As much as others think less, I really love, for example, Big Brother, because (laughs) I analyze the situations. I don’t watch it as..I read the behavior, I try to understand why people act like that. It really interests me on the level that.. if a person does something, why, where does it come from. Just for that, really it’s not gossip and.. really.

Ofrah is clearly aware of the negative stigma attached to the program, thus justifying her positive attitude by explaining that it is not a matter of “gossip,” as others may think, but that it is rooted in a deeper interest in human interaction. Denny, too, is conscious of the unfavorable consensus surrounding the show, so he says defensively, I watch Big Brother, I won’t tell you I don’t watch. I am one of those who say, yes I watch Big Brother, yes I watch the Biggest Loser. I watch it. Because it interests me the, in as much as I can manage to understand, the dynamics and the psychology of the people…

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It seems that when defined as an interest in the psychological or anthropological aspects, rather than mere curiosity or entertainment, ­ viewing the program is experienced as justified and thus more socially acceptable. Rona, for example, says, “Reality doesn’t interest me at all. The only reality that I saw and that was really an anthropological study, was the Beauty and the Geek.” By linking reality TV with intellectual interest, the viewer is able to avoid the stigma attached to reality shows. Ilana watches another reality show called Mehubarim, which follows 5 participants who are given video cameras to film their daily lives. She indicates the authenticity of the program as a motive for watching, saying she is attracted to “the personal story, the.. without a filter.” However, she offers an additional explanation, saying, “There is also something you know, voyeuristic.” Perhaps, the voyeuristic aspect is intricately linked to the psychological appeal of the program that was voiced by participants in the above quotes. Since the programs are thought to represent reality, the curiosity associated with looking in on others’ personal lives may indeed be associated with observation in psychology and anthropology. In this way, what may otherwise be conceived as negative, becomes a positive element of reality television. We have seen that various motives and perceived effects emerged as positive. Television viewing was presented as a source of pleasure and relaxation. Freedom from mental and physical effort was a central motive for watching television and the pastime was perceived as reducing the stress associated with external commitments. Watching various types of programs was experienced positively as an escape from the reality of dayto-day life, as a form of entertainment and comic relief, as a source of psychological knowledge and as a catharsis. It was also perceived as an opportunity to spend time with one’s spouse or children. Yet, many participants expressed negative feelings regarding television viewing as well as being critical about programs, as we shall see in the following. Mixed Feelings Although television viewing was found to be a popular pastime that was reported as regular as well as time-consuming, it was negatively evaluated by many, including those who indicated it as positive. In other words, contradictions emerged concerning the experience and evaluation of the activity. Perhaps the most common criticism voiced by participants was associated with the conception of television viewing as a waste of time,

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particularly when linked to unworthy content. Yet, this does not mean they avoided the activity. On the contrary, much self-criticism was voiced because of the perceived discrepancy between practice and negative views. Participants presented this as an inner conversation with themselves. Yaron, the travel agent who described his work as demanding and stressful, indicates the low standard of programs as a source of his frustration. There are days that I say, I’ve been watching nonsense for 3 hours. Sometimes I.. get stuck in front of the screen yes, and there’s nothing special on, you’re suddenly watching Guy Pinus and all that trash and you say, yuk, you feel like puking all that trash, that’s around. Big Brother I won’t watch on principal.

The use of graphic imagery serves to accentuate the sense of disgust Yaron experiences as a result of the low quality of the program. Yet, it is not only the content that makes him feel he is wasting time. The fact that he gets “stuck” watching for three hours, particularly since he considers it unworthy, may contribute to a sense of frustration and inadequacy, resulting from the fact that he does not take action despite his low opinion of the show. This guilt associated with not removing oneself from the source of irritation is evident in Leah’s words as she admonishes herself. Sometimes I just stare at the TV and say afterwards, I’m not even sure I took in what I watched because I was just.. and then I say, ok..(laughs) get a hold of yourself, get up, take a shower and get into bed because it’s just purposeless.

The purposelessness of the activity as well as a sense of a lack of self-control, may heighten the negative evaluation of watching television. On the other hand, when choice and control replace passivity, the experience is positively valued. Leah continues saying, “There are times when I can say, yes, I enjoyed myself and… if I do watch TV, then it’s watching something that I like and choose to watch.” It is interesting that the very two points of criticism here, were also perceived as contributing to a positive experience of television viewing that we saw earlier. In other words, low quality content, as well as “watching whatever’s on” were indicated as conducive

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to a sense of relaxation. Here, purposeless watching and programs described as “nonsense” intensify one’s feelings of frustration and lower one’s sense of agency. It seems that a sense of freedom is what determines a positive or negative evaluation of the practice. When it is perceived as a matter of choice, then it is experienced positively. However, if it is associated with passivity, it is interpreted as an absence of agency. The paradoxical nature of the experience was addressed by many participants. Erez, businessman, acknowledges television as a source of pleasure while still treating it as a waste of time that could be used more productively. His inner conversation reveals his dilemma related to television viewing. By posing questions to himself, he treats himself as an outsider observing his own actions. In this way, the self-gaze serves as a monitoring mechanism. When you watch TV, in the end you feel.. you enjoy it, but you’ve also burnt 3 hours watching TV. Don’t you have anything else to do? Is the house tidy, everything organized? You could have had, in the time that you sat, 3 hours to do it. But you also enjoy it. Even though in the end why? You go to bed at 1.30-2 because you watch 2 hours TV…in the morning when you get up you say, how stupid. you get up tired…but again, you have to enjoy something, you can’t always be in the work mode or in the mode of the seriousness of life.

Erez vacillates between his experience of pleasure and a sense of frustration. As he deliberates on the matter, he berates himself for not utilizing his time for domestic chores or for sleep. As I have already discussed in the chapter on the Productive Self, if productivity is highly valued, then unproductive time is likely to be negatively valued and perceived as waste of time. An activity that is goal-oriented is considered worthwhile, whereas one that is thought of as purposeless is thus negatively valued. Yet, like Leah in the above quote, he cannot deny the feeling of enjoyment and sense of escape experienced when watching. Some participants made a point of presenting themselves as being in control of their television viewing habits. Liron, owner of a large company, mentions watching Masterchef, the news, a popular drama series and an investigative program. He also watches movies and The Voice with his daughter. Yet he does not want to be mistaken for a heavy viewer so he adds, “I don’t watch a lot, I don’t have time.” Ilana, who says she watches television to relax, is also concerned with her

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self-presentation clarifying, “but I’m not one of those addicted.” Her words suggest that indiscriminate viewing means a lack of self-control resulting in addiction. Similarly, Yigal makes a point of saying, “I don’t watch TV purposelessly, Like, I watch a particular show and I don’t waste time.” The conscious decision to watch a show of his choice implies agency, as opposed to the passivity associated with purposeless viewing. As we have seen, an element of embarrassment emerged among many participants when discussing their television viewing habits. The stigma associated with television is evident in Maddy’s words, “I don’t like watching programs when there are other people around me… I feel guilty like they are looking at me, like what is she sitting there watching TV for?” For Maddy, her sense of guilt is not related to the amount of time spent watching, but to the nature of the activity and its negative evaluation by others. In contrast, Maurice says, “I don’t watch a lot so I don’t feel guilty when I watch TV.” His words suggest that as long as the individual exercises control over the amount watched, the activity is acceptable. On the other hand, if one’s viewing habits are perceived as taken for granted and lacking control, the activity may be experienced as threatening. When Eran was asked if watching television is a matter of routine for him, he replies, “Yes. Even scary how much. Only when you write it you understand. It drinks a lot of time, but yes.” It seems that for Eran, the quantification of his television viewing habits in the questionnaire makes him more aware of the great amount of time spent on the activity, clearly considered negative as is implied by the word “scary.” Computers Using computers, much like television viewing, was reported as a routine free time activity. While it was found to be less time-consuming than television, it was reported as more frequent. The oral interview revealed that computer use was largely considered instrumental with the Internet being considered a source of knowledge in a wide range of areas and useful for communication and shopping. Thus, using the computer was less likely than television viewing to be defined as a free time activity. In addition, participants expressed less criticism regarding the use of computers. At the same time, it was not presented as a source of enjoyment as was television. In other words, while contradictions emerged in the positive

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and negative evaluation of computer use, it was not as polarized as in expressions relating to television viewing. Daily Routine While results of the questionnaire indicated that, like television viewing, using the computer was a routinized daily activity, the qualitative findings suggested that it was experienced in a different way. The most prominent difference was that it was seldom described as free time or as relaxing. Its daily use was presented as goal-oriented as indicated by Rona who says, “Every morning I am used to it with my morning coffee, I turn on the computer, check my emails and..I always.. I open Walla like the home page.” Checking emails and reading the news were the two most commonly reported daily activities on the computer. Whereas television viewing was described as passive with participants saying they just watch “whatever’s on,” spending time on the computer was generally perceived as instrumental. Yigal, 57-year-old lawyer, says, I go to the computer in order to get something, to do something specific. I don’t just browse and look, unless I am looking to buy or looking for something then I’m occupied with the computer.

Participants reported using the Internet for recipes, listening to music, reading the news, playing games, shopping on various sites or looking for information as we see in Effie’s words, “I am more task-oriented when I come to look for things on the Internet. If I’m interested in something, so I want to read, then I search for a bit of information.” For Effie, computer use is motivated by set goals such as seeking information. Source of Knowledge The Internet was considered to be a major source of knowledge in many areas. Firstly, participants reported using the Internet to obtain information regarding consumption. This included comparing prices, reading about a product or a service and finding out what others thought about it. Beth describes her use of the Internet saying, “When I want to buy some product and I want to know opinions about it.” In this way, it was thought to provide, not only information, but also useful advice. When planning a vacation, participants read recommendations, as well as using maps and weather sites. This may mean simply reading reviews or

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seeking advice more actively. Debra says, “I go into forums and ask questions and..I plan carefully, I enjoy it.” For Debra, it seems that part of the pleasure of vacations may be in the planning, but it also reduces the uncertainty involved in booking on the Internet. She says, “I won’t take places without recommendations.” Participants also reported using the Internet to broaden their knowledge about topics of interest. As we saw above, this may mean actively searching for information, like Effie, or reading articles sent by email or on Facebook. Michal, for example, says she gets emails from a course she once took about, “improving the quality of life, how to be happy…little articles, links, really nice so I read. There’s someone who writes about health and nutrition, so I read that. I get regular updates.” Electronic mail and Facebook were considered to be, not only a means of communication, but also sources of information. Some participants used the Internet to “enrich” their knowledge about work-related topics ranging from engineering to law or psychology, or to help their children with homework. But, perhaps the most widespread use of the Internet as a tool for attaining knowledge and advice, was related to questions or dilemmas in one’s personal life, such as health or parenting. Participants indicated that their search for information was often linked to a specific problem or period. Debra says, “If there’s a medical problem, I sit on the Internet for 2 days and I go through everything and read all the information there is.” For her, the Internet is perceived as an authority of knowledge, which serves to equip the individual with tools with which to deal with a problem. This may be experienced as empowering since, by enhancing one’s knowledge one may feel more able to address questions about the problem more intelligently. Moreover, this need to consume as much information as possible in a short space of time suggests that the attainment of knowledge may reduce a fear of the unknown, so often associated with illnesses. Some participants related to their own medical problems such as back pain while others said their search for information was triggered by the illness of a friend or family member. Besides physical health issues, the Internet was used to search for information to help the individual become more knowledgeable about available options to alleviate certain difficulties. Maddy, mother of an ADHD child, says, “like I have a son who has ADHD so I look up all sorts of sites about what kind of treatments or bio feedback etc.” However, Michal, whose child has ADD, is somewhat wary of this source of

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information, saying she does not rely exclusively on the Internet. She explains why she uses it despite her reservations, saying, I wouldn’t do anything based on what I have read on the Internet. I read more to understand, to get a feel, maybe to know what questions to ask. But let’s say, if they suggest. I don’t know, let’s say something for ADD, I..no, I would go and check. Or I would ask people who already have experience because I know there’s a lot that’s advertising…

For Michal, deepening one’s knowledge serves as a source of empowerment when seeking advice. Yet, the information, like that of holiday accommodation, must be reinforced by recommendations based on experience. While she considers the Internet to be a useful means to attain knowledge, she is skeptical regarding sources that may pursue profit and thus questions their reliability. Seeking advice from others with experience was indicated as a need emerging during certain periods in one’s life. Leah, mother of 4, says she would go into forums when she was pregnant or breast-feeding. She says, “I wasn’t an active participant, but mainly to read. Or all sorts of things connected to children that you deliberate about, so it’s all sorts of things connected to parenting.” For Leah, the forum helped her deal with dilemmas about parenting by exposing her to others’ ideas but also by identifying and feeling a sense of communal support as we see in the following. Look, first of all there are lots of things that you say wow, there are others in my position. So it gives you some kind of..and also, and also it.. it’s like hearing and seeing other opinions about all kinds of things and that’s good.

Like other support groups, forums are experienced as comforting since the individual is surrounded with others in similar situations. This has a psychological calming effect but also widens the user’s perspective through exposure. Regarding the use of Forums or social networks, participants highlighted the benefits of being exposed to others’ opinions concerning a variety of topics. Rather than being thought of as theoretical information or knowledge, exposure was indicated as contributing to one’s worldview. Referring to Facebook, Eden points to its influence saying,

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I think that .. Facebook is a very great instrument of influence. On me too, sometimes. First of all, to hear others’ opinions. The very fact that you are exposed to tons and tons of stuff that you can’t be exposed to, to such an extent. You suddenly hear things you haven’t heard before, you see things you haven’t heard before.

Interestingly, both Leah and Eden refer to “hearing” and “seeing” whereas searching for information was associated with reading only. This may suggest a feeling of personal contact that resembles real social interaction. In this way, the virtual interactions of forums and Facebook may be experienced as more authentic and thus more reliable than informative texts. The accessibility to a variety of different views was also seen as opening a window into new outlooks. By being “exposed to tons and tons of stuff that you can’t be exposed to,” one is able to break through the boundaries of one’s limited experience. Using Facebook as a means to attain as well as transfer information was considered by many to be its central asset. For Yardena, “liking” a post on Facebook indicates her approval and she says she shares whatever she considers “important.” She goes on to give examples saying she shared a list of the people who were to light torches on Independence Day, information about the Rabbi running for the chief Rabbinate, and posts from a women’s book club. This is contrasted with what she perceives as unimportant, “I would never write where I am and what I’m doing and who I’m with. No.” In this way, she rejects common practices that she sees as banal. In her view, using Facebook for worthy purposes and avoiding trivialities, thus justifies her participation. Connection and Entertainment Other participants simply described Facebook as a means of keeping in contact with friends and family, particularly those living far away. Some preferred passive involvement. As Maddy says, “I only read I don’t write anything (laughs). I read, it’s nice. Get updated, sometimes…likes or a few words.” Eden describes it as, “My connection with people, who I wouldn’t have contact with otherwise… through that I know what their lives are like, and that I really like.” It allows her to look in on others’ lives creating a sense of familiarity and perhaps intimacy. This may also serve as a point of social comparison. Interestingly, although these words suggest a positive view of Facebook, only two described Facebook as enjoyable. Either it was described as instrumental or simply as a way to pass

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the time, for example during a boring meeting or while having a coffee break. Eden says, “I don’t just sit there in the kitchen with a cup of coffee, I sit in front of Facebook (laughs).” By using Facebook while having coffee, it is presented as more acceptable since it simply accompanies another activity. As well as being a source of knowledge or advice and a means of staying in touch, a number of participants reported using computers for entertainment. Indicated as an alternative medium for viewing movies and television series, this use was similar to that of television viewing resembling the practice both in content, as well as in manner. However, despite the passive nature of this mode of consumption, it was presented as involving more individual choice than television, which, as we have seen, was reported by many participants to be a habitualized practice whereby they just “sit down” and watch “whatever’s on.” Some reported watching Youtube clips and listening to music on the computer and a number used the computer for hobbies. Games such as solitaire, Sudoku or chess were mentioned and described as both enjoyable and challenging. Yet, very few described computer use as a source of pleasure. Wasting Time When perceived as having a set goal, computer use was viewed positively. However, when thought to be “purposeless,” it was experienced negatively. As one participant says, “The second it’s not focused on a goal, I lose my patience because its purposeless.” Facebook, in particular, much like reality TV, was described negatively by many participants. This included criticism voiced by users. For instance, Denny, who says he uses Facebook to keep in contact with friends, illustrates what he considers an unworthy use saying, “People write nonsense on Facebook. Nonsense… there are some who write, I made a cake, they take a picture. What a cake. I made a pot of..” Like Yardena, Denny objects to the self-centered banalities which people post for everyone to see. Although criticism was directed at these trivialities and the way people expose their private lives, many of the participants who criticized Facebook for these reasons, said they enjoyed looking in on the lives of others, though they stressed the fact that they would not expose themselves. Yardena says,

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Facebook I only read. I don’t write anything about myself. I don’t like to expose myself in front of everyone. I have girlfriends.. Facebook friends that I’m amazed, every cup of coffee they drink somewhere they write, every outing, every trip, all that… I’m not willing to expose myself. Absolutely not. On the other hand, when I read it, it’s like peeping… I don’t like the exposure, on the other hand I have no problem reading others. (smiles)

Yardena is fully aware of the contradiction where, on the one hand exhibitionism is criticized, yet the word “peeping” suggests that she still acknowledges the voyeuristic nature of her Facebook habits. Many participants related negatively, not only to the nature of content but also to the time-consuming element of computer practices. Yardena describes how what may begin as a routine, goal-oriented activity, becomes a waste of time. She says that on her day off she comes home from gym and sits down to check emails. I can be drawn into it for 2 or 3 hours and I say, wow, it’s almost noon and I haven’t done anything. Yes I have done something else, just not something productive… you see a link and go into it and you find yourself in something you hadn’t intended to read and then you’re already being drawn into something else…

Here too, as with television, the participant’s inner conversation reveals her sense of frustration and perhaps guilt from not having utilized her time in a more productive way. The fact that she describes herself as passively being “drawn into it” or that “you find yourself in something you hadn’t intended,” suggests that it is experienced as a lack of self-control. When an activity is linked to an absence of self-discipline, it is interpreted as unworthy. This link between passivity and a perceived waste of time emerged as the chief negative characteristic of computer use. The expression, “drawn into” was used by a number of participants to convey the sense of lack of agency whereby the individual is unable to take action in the face of the associative nature of computer practices. Effie says, “you go into look for one thing and then you’re drawn into something else. Suddenly a second and you’re drawn and you watch a clip and suddenly you watch another clip.” The Hebrew word for “drawn” implies a more powerful pull since the word, when used as a verb in its active form, means pumping. Thus, it conveys a sense of being pulled by a force that is difficult

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to resist, or as another puts it, “you’re drawn into it whether you like it or not.” The word “suddenly” suggests an outer force over which one has no control. Rona indicates this powerful pull saying, You know, from topic to topic and then I find I have wasted an hour or two of my life on the computer…Though I do learn tons from it, I’m exposed to tons of things. After all, it’s a parallel world, a parallel universe where you can live.

Again, what defines it as a waste of time is being passively pulled into another sphere. Her description suggests that the associative nature of computer use may be so powerful as to take the user away from reality, into a “parallel universe.” For others, the lack of productivity classified it as wasting time. Leah says, “I can sometimes just sit in front of the computer and do stuff that is, as far as I’m concerned, a waste of time.. like not useful.” The self-gaze is evident in the inner conversation that she describes as she continues, “sometimes I catch myself saying why this now? You’ve wasted your time. It’s just a waste!” As we saw with television viewing, the self-surveillance brings about self-criticism, which is voiced as an internal conversation that disciplines the individual as we see in Eden’s words relating to Facebook, “wow, don’t I have anything better to do with my time that I’m sitting here doing this nonsense?” By addressing herself from an outsider’s point of view, she is able to critically evaluate her computer habits. Others expressed a total dependency regarding computers. Pam, for example says, “I am very, very dependent. The second I don’t have Internet, I feel really cut off, really.” For her, it is experienced as a connection to the outer world without which she feels cut off. Debra says she is “intravenously attached to it,” explaining, “my whole life is there, all my photo albums, all the emails, all my lectures.” However, she seems to be uncomfortable with this self-image adding, “But again, it’s not that I’m on the computer every day.” On the one hand, she is well aware of the addictive nature of her computer use, however she does not wish to present herself as such. Cellphones Before presenting how participants talked about their cellphone use in free time, I wish to note two points. Firstly, due to its mobility, its use

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is different to other media technology. This means that cellphone use is not limited spatially or temporally, so that the free time use of cellphones is likely to be spread out during the day rather than occupying a block of time. Secondly, the use of cellphones, specifically smartphones, is increasing all the time. Besides allowing access to email, Facebook, clips and movies, new phone applications (apps) appear every day, many of which are associated with free time. For example, popular apps such as Whatsapp, are used, not only for communication, but also for passing on clips, jokes and photos, while other apps are used for, photography, music, running and more. Consequently, the use of cellphones is likely to occupy more and more of our free time in the future, even though it may not be consciously thought of as such. Much has been said, both in the media as well as in research about the implications of cellphone use, many focusing on the negative impact on social interaction (see Chapter 2). Thus, in order to gain a deeper insight into how people experience their cellphone use, the interview addressed subjective meanings attached to cellphone practices, a perspective that has hitherto been somewhat neglected. The qualitative findings shed light on participants’ understandings, motives and evaluations related to their free time cellphone use. Keeping in Touch Participants indicated social contact as one of the central motives for cellphone use. Some described it as important while others pointed to its practicality. Few indicated its use as pleasurable. Interestingly, no male participants indicated keeping in touch as a motive for cellphone use. Beth’s cellphone use is seen as a means of interaction yet also part of her time for herself. She explains that she makes calls when driving to and from work since that is a time when nobody bothers her. She says, “People who are important for me to talk to, I have set times when I speak to them on the phone.” The word “important” implies that the connection is perceived as having value. Contact with family in particular, was indicated as worthy as we see in Adina’s words. She, too uses the word “important.” It’s very important to me. It’s my connection with my kids, yes talking, SMS’s, now the kids have opened a Whatsapp group, a regular family group where they babble on but it’s cute, it’s continual communication.

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For Adina, any form of communication is a means of connection even when trivial such as “babble.” As a mother, she finds it endearing. This is also apparent in Yardena’s words. Like Adina, she suggests that the content is mundane, yet she implies that it is precisely this characteristic that perpetuates the connection with her children, who no longer live at home. It’s a connection, not to lose, to know what’s going on in their lives. And they put on pictures. The eldest puts on pictures of the grandchild so everyone sees and another who doesn’t live ay home so all sorts of things she does. She buys clothes, she takes a photo, some restaurant, she takes a photo of what they’re eating, all sorts of nonsense of young .. so like the connection remains, it doesn’t disappear.

A certain fondness is evident in her words which suggest that the virtual sharing of everyday activities makes her feel she is sharing her children’s lives. Interestingly, when relating to a Whatsapp group with her friends, which she describes as “nice,” she refers to the practical benefits, implying that it can be used as an efficient tool to save time and effort. She says, “Sometimes, instead of telling the same thing to everyone, so the Whatsapp is enough and everyone knows what it’s about. It saves, it saves.” With her children, Whatsapp interaction was considered significant, whereas with friends, it was simply instrumental. This does not mean that the two elements cannot overlap as we see in the following, as Pam explains her preference for texting over phonecalls. I hardly ever talk on the phone, very little. The connection with my daughter on Whatsapp is very important. Very, very important to me. Also with my son… Here, as opposed to the phone, you don’t have to check if he’s available or not…That’s a huge advantage. That’s why I don’t really like the phone. Someone catches you, and you really, really want to be with them, but you are not free that second.

For Pam, it is seen as a means of devoting full attention to a significant other. She begins with the premise that her connection with her children is important to her. It follows that the connection can only be worthwhile if both parties are emotionally available. In this way, the individual is able to control her/his interaction with others and thus ensure more meaningful communication. Again, the repeated use of the word “important” accentuates the value of the mother-child connection.

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As well as being experienced as enhancing the connection with children, cellphones were also indicated as reducing anxiety. Beth says simply, “It gives me security in everything regarding the kids…the same with my family, if they need me.” For Beth, being constantly available is perceived as a benefit, ensuring a sense of security. For some, being able to contact others is seen, not only as an advantage but also as a means of avoiding negative emotional states as Eden points out, “I think it makes life easier, the fact that you can get hold of someone without hysterics.” Adina too, uses the word “hysterical” to convey the possible consequences of not being able to reach one’s children. Yet she also deliberates about whether cellphones may be the cause as well as the solution to anxiety. I am more relaxed, otherwise I am hysterical. That is if, let’s say I try to reach my child and he doesn’t answer for a few hours I go totally hysterical. So maybe it has the negative side that if it didn’t exist we would be less hysterical, but as far as I’m concerned, it’s very good.

It seems that for mothers, in particular, cellphones were conceived as a valuable tool of communication with one’s children. As I have said, this aspect of cellphone use was not mentioned by any of the male participants. Cellphones and Time Indeed, many participants pondered the question of advantages and disadvantages of cellphones, often linking it to time use. On the one hand, the many functions, as well as the mobility of the devices, were thought to be beneficial, contributing to efficiency. On the other hand, the constant accessibility to these functions was also experienced as problematic regarding time use. Besides calls and texting, the camera function was perceived as positive as was the GPS, the calendar and the accessibility to email and Google. Yasmin says she uses her phone instead of a computer for all these purposes, adding, “that’s why I have an Iphone, I have made progress.” The word “progress” suggests that for Yasmin, these functions are considered to be benefits that contribute to a sense of efficiency. Erez, who works long hours, uses his cellphone to “switch off” by watching funny Youtube clips in the middle of his workday. For him it is a way to transform work time into a break from it. He says,

202  M. SHIR-WISE Today a cellphone device is everything but a phone. It passes the time. You sit at a traffic light, turn it on straight away, watch something…yes it is a device that passes the time beautifully.

Erez uses the device as a means to “pass” the time. However, he indicates the negative side saying, “there’s no doubt it’s an excellent device but it also robs you of time.” This paradox was indicated by other participants, who, on the one hand, perceived the device as a means to save time, yet also considered it to be time-consuming. We see this in Michal’s words. I utilize the time. If I am sitting waiting, don’t know, for a doctor, At some point I always look. Or if I’m waiting for an answer that interests me, also all sorts of errands I do by email, whether it’s insurance whether it’s.. all sorts of nonsense like. It’s amazing how time-consuming they are.

Although she opens with the word “utilize,” which is followed by the practical uses of the device, she concludes with the words, “nonsense” and “time-consuming,” pointing to the problematic aspects of cellphones. The habituation of cellphone use was also linked to negative feelings. Much like many of the descriptions that we saw regarding computer use, this may be associated with a lack of control as we see in the following. There are days when it’s a burden that I suddenly find myself, I see that I didn’t get anything done, I just fiddled with my phone. I just answered, just read and I didn’t get around to doing all sorts of things that I wanted to do.

Her cellphone is experienced as a “burden” since it is perceived as an obstacle preventing her from achieving what she had intended. The word “fiddled,” much like the word “nonsense” that we saw earlier, suggests that the use is trivial and the phrase “I suddenly find myself,” implies a feeling of inefficacy where perhaps the device has power over her rather than the reverse. The perception of cellphones as a burden may be linked to availability, which means responding at all times. This is seen by Yardena as a matter of etiquette, as is evident in the following.

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First of all, it’s a kind of respect to a person who wrote and is waiting, he’s probably checking all the time, if someone has answered him or not. So it’s a kind of.. also even if I don’t have a response at that moment, so at least I acknowledge that I got it and that I will respond later.

As we have seen in Chapter 4, cellphones were indicated as contributing to work related stress since they blur temporal and spatial boundaries between work and free time. Having to be constantly available was associated with a sense of pressure and frustration. Indeed, a number of male participants, indicated cellphone use as largely work related, yet, as we shall see, it seems that the routinized use of the device has crossed into free time. Liron relates to his cellphone as “a very useful tool” explaining that it is mainly for work. However, the interview was interrupted many times by the beeping or ringing of his phone to which he responded throughout by answering calls or replying to text messages, which he said were from his daughter. Perhaps habits developed due to work obligations become so deeply entrenched that it becomes difficult to differentiate between work and free time. Indeed, he later expresses a sense of inadequacy and a wish to take control. The truth is that it robs you of time. It’s something I still need to learn to control, definitely. Because all the time it makes me be on things that aren’t really important. So I.. I still have to overcome this thing… I don’t really turn it off ever.

The quote reveals an awareness of dependency that he feels he must “control” and “overcome.” This sense of addiction to the device emerged among other participants. Like Liron, Oren indicates work as the major use. Possibly, the idea of using one’s phone for work purposes is seen as legitimate and even worthy, while other uses may be conceived as being a waste of time. Yet, despite indicating work as the central function of his cellphone, we see that his dependency on the device goes beyond work-related needs. Listen, I am attached to this thing all the time, mainly because of work… let’s say, the second I get home I put it somewhere, but I keep going back to it, looking,…you’re like an addict… I never turn it off… before I go to bed I have a look again or between, I suddenly look, but I don’t sit there looking at it.

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Oren’s description of his need to constantly check his phone reveals a certain helplessness as he is pulled to the device. A sense of attachment was also evident in Yaron’s choice of metaphor, describing the device as an extension of his body. He says, “If I forget my phone at home it’s forgetting my hand at home, look it’s for work…not just for work. Today I feel it is an inseparable part of my self, my life, my..” Later in the interview he adds, “It has become, unfortunately I think, sadly, it has become such an important part that we can’t be without it. If you don’t have it in your pocket, you feel handicapped, a kind of disability.” The habituation of cellphone use is presented as an addiction and thus associated with “disability.” This metaphor highlights the all-encompassing, constraining effect over which the individual has little control. Similarly, Zack, who says he can’t turn his phone off, mainly because of work, says that it was not very pleasant to hear one of his children commenting on his dependency. Pointing to the detrimental effect on social interaction, he says he believes that the younger generation doesn’t know how to communicate face to face because they are used to communicating through technology. Interestingly, the negative social impact of cellphone use was not mentioned by many participants. This is surprising in light of the attention given, both in research and in the media, to this aspect of cellphone use. Those participants who did refer to negative social implications, spoke about the effect on others rather than relating to themselves. For example, Erez, who as we have seen, described his cellphone as “everything but a phone,” saying it “passes the time beautifully,” talks about the negative social implications when referring to his children. He says, “everyone sits next to each other and each one is looking at his own cellphone. They don’t talk to each other at all.” However, he does not relate to problematic social consequences of cellphones regarding his own use. Modes of Resistance As we have seen, besides being experienced positively, media practices were also associated with negative feelings and evaluations. Thus, in order to deal with the negative aspects, participants adopted modes of resistance so as to limit both the amount of time spent on them as well as the types of use. This included taking a stand vis a vis their own media consumption habits as well as those of their children.

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Television, in particular, was presented as requiring self-disciplined resistance. The ability to resist and exercise self-control was boasted in the self-presentation of a number of participants. Yaffa’s words suggest that she has set definite boundaries not only for herself but also for the entire household. She says proudly, “At my place you don’t sit and watch TV.” For Neta, the emphasis is on the negative passivity of television viewing which she is able to resist, “By me there’s no such thing as sitting and staring in front of the TV. That concept of staring doesn’t exist by me.” For both Yaffa and Neta, by using terms such as “at my place” or “by me,” they not only present themselves as having principles, but they also imply that they are in control as opposed to others, who may not have the self-discipline required to resist. One participant, Sarit, explains why she and her husband do not have a television in the home. Her perception of television as a waste of time was indicated as the central reason, as she relates to the problem of indiscriminate viewing and the “snowball” effect it may have. She also refers to the possible negative influence of some of the programs on her children. Although aware that “today it’s not such a big thing because today you watch everything on the computer,” she believes that it is still “not like pressing a button and that’s it.” Her words suggest that watching programs on the computer requires active choice rather than just switching on. It may follow that the viewer is less likely to “get stuck” watching program after program as many participants described their experience of television viewing. While Sarit was the only one without a television in the home, others related to its absence in certain rooms of the house. For example, during the interview, Denny, father of 4, asks, “Did you notice there is no TV in the lounge room?” Objecting to the interference of television with social interaction, he explains, “if there was a TV, you and I wouldn’t be able to sit and talk.” Others made a point of saying they don’t have televisions in the bedrooms. This measure was presented as a matter of “principle.” Efrat, psychologist, indicates two main reasons for the “principle.” Firstly, she says that this means they watch together as a family. Secondly, she believes it moderates her children’s viewing since the parents can see what they’re watching. For Erez, father of 5, the principle of not having televisions in the children’s rooms, is to control the amount watched rather than the content. As we have seen, he perceives uncontrolled viewing as a waste of time, so he attempts to control his children’s television consumption. He says, “It’s a matter of principle that there aren’t

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TV’s in the rooms.” When asked why, he replies, “so that they go to sleep. It’s enough that their parents are mad staying up late because of TV. Let them grow up and then get ruined by themselves. Why should we ruin them?” While the last sentence is said in jest, Erez indicates television as a destructive force due to unrestrained viewing habits. As a parent, he feels he must restrict his children’s viewing. A number of other participants mention the abstention from cable television as a measure taken to avoid habituated, indiscriminate viewing. One mother says, “I’m not willing to have cable in the house because I don’t want them to plonk themselves down in front of TV.” Another allows cable television during the summer vacation only. To convey the passivity and addictive nature of television viewing, she says her children become “like pitas,” perhaps the Israeli variation of couch potatoes. Others took pride in their ability to exercise control over their choice of content. We shall see that this was also true regarding other forms of media. The themes of self-control and choice emerged as central to the active resistance of these participants. Vera, for instance, says, “Like, if I don’t like a program that I’m watching, I get hold of myself that I don’t like it and get up, yes.” By physically removing herself and exercising selective choice, she is able to attain a sense of control over her viewing habits, a mastery she has developed as we see in the following words, “I have learnt to pick myself up.” For Vera, it is a matter of consciously teaching oneself to do so. Maurice describes his refusal to watch certain programs as a “protest.” Talking about reality TV he says, “I get up because I’m not interested. I think it’s all staged and I really don’t like it but my family does, so I don’t sit with them…as a protest.” The fact that he must remove himself from the rest of the family may make the act all the more challenging for him, yet more demonstrative of his self-control. On the other hand, others said they sit and watch programs that they don’t particularly like, just to spend time with the family. For Yaron, the social factor may lead to compromises. He says, “Big Brother, I won’t watch on principal. Sometimes, you know I like..I see what’s happening at work, so that I know who the characters are, that people are talking about it, but on principle I really don’t, not Big Brother and not all the..” Watching the program, in this case, was justified as a need to be socially in touch with current topics of conversation. This social element was also indicated by Leah regarding a popular drama series that her colleagues talked about at work. She says, “If you haven’t watched, you feel left out.” On the other hand, she says that she is not

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willing to watch programs such as Big Brother or other reality shows even if they are discussed by others. Indeed, reality TV programs in particular, were criticized as unworthy and thus requiring resistance and the protection of children. Denny says he “can’t understand how they can be put on TV,” later calling it “gum for the brain” and Efrat describes Big Brother as “sub culture.” Both say they don’t like their children to watch. The stigma of reality shows revolved around the low intellectual and moral level of the programs as well as its misrepresentation of “reality.” Erez differentiates between different reality shows saying he won’t let his children watch Big Brother or Survivor, yet he allows them to watch Masterchef since it “doesn’t emphasize the bad.” Similarly, Denny doesn’t like his children watching Big Brother because of what he terms, the “disrespect” and Maurice points to the “invasion of privacy” as problematic. These quotes relate to the questionable moral level as the grounds for their disapproval of the program. Eran, on the other hand, objected to the over-drama of Masterchef that is, in his view, “overly concerned with people and less with food.” Interestingly, this human interest feature was what appealed to those who were attracted by the “psychological” aspect of the reality shows. Moreover, just as some participants were captivated by the supposed reality of the show, others criticized the “distortion of reality.” Itai expressed his irritation saying, “It annoys me. I think it’s all predetermined.” While reality shows were more widely criticized than other genres, participants also expressed negative views of other programs. In the same way as Big Brother was disparaged due to its moral dubiousness, Maddy relates to her reservations regarding the question of morals in Grey’s Anatomy, a medical series that she watches. I don’t like the lack of morals that most of these programs have. You know, they are just, you know people sleeping with each other and just this general sort of lack of, you know of what I call morals which I sort of, probably that this is what society has come to or that that’s what they want us to think society has come to.

Just as other participants preferred their children not to watch programs that may have a detrimental effect because of the questionable moral messages conveyed, Maddy’s words suggest that such programs may have a negative influence on its viewers by presenting what she sees

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as unworthy behavior, as the norm. Much like the criticism of reality shows for presenting themselves as real, she believes that the negative values conveyed in the program are misrepresented as reality. I suggest that awareness is a form of resistance. The fact that television depictions of relationships are not taken for granted as representations of real life, or the supposed reality in reality shows is questioned, may help the viewer resist the cultural models that may otherwise be accepted and internalized. It is not only negative values that were indicated as problematic, but also positive images that that were perceived as possibly forging false expectations in the viewer. Maddy adds, There is no question that people have, I think, an impression that life romance is going to be like romance in the movies, no question. Like, you know, you are expecting your relationship with your husband is going to be like the young, fake people on TV who don’t have other worries or any other day-to-day life things and so you know there is this kind of expectation of, like romance and you know.

In the same way as reality TV was criticized as a “distortion of reality,” here the “fake” depiction of relationships is presented as an unrealistic model for romance. Yaron suggests that the mere salience of certain content may promote behavior that is in keeping with images. The exposure to such images may guide actions by shaping the viewer’s conceptions, as the following illustrates. …the shows you watch like they always sit on these exotic places on the beaches and this and that and there is no question that makes you sort of feel like you want to get away you want to go to these exotic places.

The words imply that the viewer’s conception of what is desirable may be molded by the repetitive exposure to ideal images. This impact of the media was indicated as shaping our very conceptions of what is worthy, whether it be linked to free time practices or the self. Vera says that she thinks appearances matter more than they should because of “TV, the newspapers, the models, the big ads that make us prefer the beautiful over the good.” She also points to the negative feelings that certain programs may arouse. Expressing her objection to watching

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the news, she says, “this one says, this one analyzes, this one.. it makes me feel not good, so I don’t watch.” In this way, her resistance allows her to avoid such feelings. Pam, too, criticizes the news, focusing on the verbosity, which she finds intolerable. She thus limits her viewing to a bare minimum, explaining, “News drive me crazy. Talk, talk, talk. I can’t, I can’t. Turn it down! It’s enough to update me what’s happening, what’s happened. Two sentences is enough for me (smiles).” For Pam, watching the news has a clear goal, being updated. As far as she is concerned, once the basic goal is achieved there is no point in watching. This ability to be selective regarding one’s viewing was thus associated with agency. As with television, many participants made a point of presenting themselves as light users of computers. In other words, they were conscious of portraying a self with agency. For instance, although Denny lists the many ways he uses Facebook, such as congratulating friends on their birthdays, keeping in touch with overseas friends or doing “fun things that people like,” he begins by saying, “I’m hardly ever on Facebook, I’m not interested.” For Yaffa, even though she indicates the negative aspect of associative tendencies when using the Internet, like Debra, she wishes to clarify that she is not a heavy user. But there’s also unnecessary roaming around on the computer…someone sends me something, a link, so I go into the link, suddenly I see another link then you get drawn into more things to see. But I can’t say that I burn hours on the computer, definitely not.

Central to this self-presentation is portraying oneself as being in control of one’s actions, despite possible temptations. In this way the individual may feel superior to others, when social comparison is used to enhance one’s own sense of agency. Ofrah says, “A bit of Facebook and.. no not like those addicted people you see. I don’t sit in a café with a laptop, no.” While others may be “addicted,” lacking self-restraint and consequently unable to monitor appropriate social behavior, Ofrah makes a point of distinguishing herself from those types of people. The above quotes suggest a form of resistance. By presenting themselves as having self-discipline, as opposed to others who succumb to addiction and time wasting, their behavior is experienced as resistance. Yet, there were others who advocated resistance through abstention. When asked if sitting at the computer is part of his daily routine, Yigal says, “definitely not, definitely not. Not Facebook and not Twitter and

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not… when I look at other people, how they are dependent on these groups, it bothers me. Absolutely not.” His use of strong language clarifies his attitude, particularly toward social networks. Debra, for example, resists by deleting Groupon emails “straight away,” explaining that she doesn’t “have time for that rubbish.” As with television viewing, participants also presented family as a central concern motivating resistance. For example, Adina says, “We don’t have Facebook or any of that stuff. I think it’s a waste of time…we have a family computer that is in the family room facing anyone who passes… everything is open and nobody has anything to hide.” For Adina, the measures adopted in her family, are intended to deal with the problem of wasting time as well as issues of unwanted secrecy and, perhaps dangers that may arise through the use of such sites. A policy of openness in the family thus serves to overcome potential problems. Just as participants had expressed their resistance to other media habits, so too did they develop modes of resistance to cellphone use, though these related mainly to their children’s use. Neta explains, We decided that during Shabbat dinner all cellphones go upstairs. No, Shabbat dinners there are no phones… Between seven and eight the phones are silent on Shabbat evening. There’s no such thing that during Shabbat dinner you answer the phone… the kids understand the need.. see they’re already older. When they were younger I would find myself struggling…

Itai has adopted this practice for all meals when he says he doesn’t “allow anyone to come to the table with a phone.” Yet, he also relates to his own use saying “if I’m eating and, you call me now very urgently, I won’t answer. It has crossed the line of good taste.” He objects to constant availability and thus reinforces his resistance through household rules. As far as he is concerned, “a phone should be hello, hello and that’s it. It would be even better not to have one.” For Yaffa, exercising resistance is related to the type of devices her family uses, as well as ensuring that the negative aspects of cellphones are conveyed to her children. She says, It’s true that in our home, the house manages with relatively simple cellphones. We are not people who invest in that thing…there are lots of minuses to those things. The hours you put into.. there is a message conveyed in the house that, somehow the kids understand that.. they understand the minuses.

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As with Neta and Itai, for Yaffa, resistance is presented as a matter of principle. The implied comparison to other “people” distinguishes her family from others presenting herself as being in control. Such comparisons to others may contribute to one’s sense of agency as well as feelings of self-worth. We see that when expressing negative feelings related to cellphone use, the time-consuming factor, as well as dependency emerged as far more salient than the social aspect. Discussion The widespread use of media in free time, found in the current study, is certainly not a novel finding. Time use studies have indicated a high proportion of time being spent on these activities (Statista 2016; ATUS 2018). Such research focuses on quantity, frequency and time spent on media practices in relation to other activities. Recent surveys and research have examined specific aspects of media such as stress and well-being among social media users, the effects on children and young adults or social connections and relationships in the digital age (Bargh and McKenna 2004; Hampton et al. 2015; Hampton and Wellman 2001; Livingstone et al. 2018; Okdie and Ewoldsen 2018; Vanman et al. 2018; Verduyn et al. 2017). Yet scant attention has been given to the way people feel about their daily media consumption, namely how it is experienced and evaluated and what motivates users to spend time on media practices. The current findings reveal paradoxical evaluations, motives and experiences. On the one hand, participants regarded media consumption as part of daily routine and experienced it positively. On the other hand, it was also described negatively with many participants being critical, often manifesting resistance to certain practices. Contradictory descriptions emerged particularly when relating to television viewing. It was described as pleasure and as relaxing both physically and mentally. The practice was found to be illustrative of participants’ definitions of free time as freedom from daily pressure, commitments and emotional stress. Yet negative evaluations of the practice were expressed by participants, who, even when describing it as enjoyable, often referred to the low quality of programs in an apologetic tone. It was also indicated as a waste of time more than any other pastime. Participants also expressed mixed feelings regarding computer use. While it was described as instrumental, it was experienced as addictive or

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a waste of time as well. Cellphones, too, were considered a useful means of connecting family, however their use was also viewed as a hindrance to social interaction or experienced as compulsive, thus necessitating resistive measures. In other words, despite the frequent use of media that participants reported and their positive descriptions of these practices, they also indicated the negative aspects. Consequently a central focus of their self-presentation was the display of agency, self-discipline or resistance in relation to media use. How can we account for the participants’ contradictory experience of media use? Moreover, given their negative evaluations, why is such a large proportion of free time spent on media practices? What makes people repeat such activities on a daily basis even though they are negatively valued? And why are media practices, such as watching television, which was described as relaxing or enjoyable, still largely considered less worthy than many other free time practices? I suggest a number of explanations that may help make sense of this conundrum. The first is related precisely to the repetitious nature of these practices. Since media activities are habitualized, they may be experienced as mundane. In other words, media activities lack the appeal of other pastimes that are considered special, due to the fact that they are not performed daily. If we use a gemological simile, special events, outings and unusual activities are rare and precious like diamonds, whereas media activities, like ordinary stones, are readily available and thus not valued. However, routine has its attraction, since it goes hand in hand with a sense of familiarity and predictability, which sustain ontological security (Silverstone 1994). In this way, much like other rituals, habituated media consumption helps overcome uncertainty, thereby motivating the individual to continue performing these activities. As we saw, media consumption, as part of day-to-day routine, orders time, often marking a transition from work to leisure (Selberg 1993). A second possible explanation is that a sense of freedom is crucial to one’s positive experience of free time activities. As opposed to committed time, free time is considered an arena where the individual is able to control actions. On the one hand, the individual may feel free from duties, thus creating a sense of agency and freedom. On the other hand, the nature of such practices contributes, as we have seen, to a feeling of passivity as one is “drawn into” the activity indiscriminately. Stebbins points out that using casual leisure such as television viewing as recuperative is likely to become a habitual “way of life” (Stebbins 2001: 53).

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When media use is experienced as such or as addictive, it may thus be associated with a lack of agency and self-discipline, which necessitates self-admonition manifest in the inner conversations that emerged in the interviews. Only when the individual feels that the practice incorporates individual choice as well as self-discipline, can it be experienced fully and positively, without ambivalence. Thirdly, feelings of guilt were associated, not only with the compulsive, indiscriminate nature of media consumption, but also with its contradiction to notions of productivity. That is to say, it is not thought of as an efficient utilization of time. Thus, while it may be experienced as enjoyable, the sense of shame associated with idleness and wasting time, may mar feelings of pleasure. Perhaps this may help explain why computer and cellphone use, both of which participants considered instrumental, were not described as negatively as television viewing. Interestingly, however, concerts or plays were not perceived as a waste of time, despite sharing the unproductive characteristic of television viewing. Indeed, this brings me to an important cultural consideration that may color participants’ experiences of media activities. This fourth factor points to the distinction between highbrow and lowbrow culture, which may be a source of stigma attached to media practices. While the appeal of concerts and plays may be partly explained by the fact that they are not daily practices and therefore conceived as special, as we have said, I suggest that, culturally accepted notions of high culture, make them more highly valorized. Media consumption, on the other hand was associated with low culture and stigma. Many participants related to their consumption of reality TV shows or Facebook, in particular, in a tone of embarrassment, often apologetic or attempting to justify their actions. Since taste classifies, as Bourdieu (1984) suggests, participants may feel that indicating a distinction between “the distinguished and the vulgar” (p. 6) is evidence of taste. Yet, considering the upper middle class status of the participants of the study, the perception of practices, organized by habitus, may generate feelings of shame linked to low culture, even though it is consumed on a daily basis. So while their consumption is “omnivorous,” as Peterson and Kern (1996) claim, this does not mean an indifference to distinctions (p. 904). In other words, people may now be “freer” to consume different kinds of culture (Gans 1999), yet distinctions between high and low culture may still color their perceptions of what is worthy.

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Nevertheless, despite the negative evaluations associated with media practices, we have seen that they were also experienced positively, as relaxing and enjoyable. Besides those explicit descriptions of media time, the very fact that participants reported spending a large proportion of their free time on media use, and doing so regularly, indicates that that there must be something appealing in those practices. Perhaps, as we have said, an integral part of the experience is its association with freedom. Considering that participants related to media use, particularly television, as a transition into free time, this reinforces the notion of media time as “switching off ” from day-to-day duties and the stress associated with them. Indeed, as we saw in Chapter 4, participants described work and domestic duties as contributing to a sense of time pressure and psychological strain. Media practices allow individuals to truly “escape” and “clear the head” since they require little effort whether physical or mental, such as decision-making and planning. However, it is not merely a question of the absence of effort but also the element of escapism, as described by participants, when the viewer experiences certain programs as an escape from reality. Additionally, as we have said, media practices may generate a feeling of freedom as they provide respite from the constant commitment to a Productive Self (Chapter 6) that must ­utilize every minute productively and invest time and effort working on the self-project. So the very attraction of media practices may lie in its ­antithesis of productivity and the absence of set goals, making passivity particularly appealing and experienced as relaxing. Having said that, computer use, in contrast to television viewing, was often indicated as goal-oriented and functional as a means for attaining information and knowledge. Interestingly, while the quality of content on television was questioned by participants, the Internet was generally indicated as a source of reliable information. Perhaps the written word, which may be linked to higher culture and to scientific knowledge, is conceived as truth to which the individual can turn. Internet sites are conceived as legitimate sources of knowledge and the process of searching is experienced as more active than passive television viewing. In this way, media practices may also satisfy what Maslow (1943: 384) calls the “desires to know and understand,” as well as emotional needs related to catharsis and identification. In other words, media practices, although often conceived negatively, may fulfill the individual’s needs in more ways than one.

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My final point relates to the possible socio-cultural impact of media in the light of the extent and frequency of media practices that emerged in the present study, as in studies worldwide. The consumption of various forms of media exposes individuals to cultural scripts that offer models of self and lifestyle. I suggest that these models are internalized as correct and desirable, which may generate a sense of inadequacy resulting from the perceived discrepancy between conceptions of the self and models. From a Foucauldian perspective, media, as a source of knowledge, is a regime of truth determining the types of discourse that are accepted (Foucault 1980: 131). This may include bio-medical and therapeutic discourses, as well as discursive prescriptions for consumption, bodywork or parenting (see Chapter 2). Our conceptions of self and our understanding of the world are likely to be shaped by media images and information as well as the cultural values that they convey. It seems that media time may not be as trivial as we may think.

References American Time Use Survey (ATUS). 2018. American Time Use Survey Summary. Bureau of Labor Statistics. https://www.bls.gov/news.release/ atus.nr0.htm. Accessed Oct 2018. Bargh, John A., and Katelyn Y.A. McKenna. 2004. The Internet and Social Life. Annual Review of Psychology 55: 573–590. Baudrillard, Jean. [1970] 1998. The Consumer Society: Myths and Structures. London: Sage. Bauman, Zygmunt. 2005. Liquid Life. Cambridge, UK and Malden, MA: Polity Press. Benjamin, Walter. [1935] 1997. Charles Baudelaire, A Lyric Poet in the Era of High Capitalism. London: Verso Books. Bourdieu, Pierre. 1984. Distinction: A Social Critique of the Judgement of Taste, trans. by Richard Nice. London: Routledge and Kegan Paul. Campbell, Colin. 1987. The Romantic Ethic and The Spirit of Modern Consumerism. Oxford: Blackwell. Fiske, John. 1987. Television Culture. London: Methuen. Foucault, Michel. 1980. Power/Knowledge: Selected Interviews and Other Writings, 1972–1977. New York: Pantheon Books. Gans, Herbert. 1999. Popular Culture and High Culture: An Analysis and Evaluation of Taste. New York: Basic Books. Gershuny, Jonathan. 2000. Changing Times: Work and Leisure in Postindustrial Society. Oxford: Oxford University Press.

216  M. SHIR-WISE Gitlin, Todd. 1986. Watching Television: A Pantheon Guide to Popular Culture. New York: Pantheon. Hampton, Keith, Lee Rainie, Weixu Lu, Inyoung Shin, and Kristen Purcell. 2015. Social Media and the Cost of Caring. Pew Research Centre. http:// www.pewinternet.org/2015/01/15/social-media-and-stress/. Accessed May 2015. Hampton, Keith, and Barry Wellman. 2001. Long Distance Community in the Network Society Contact and Support Beyond Netville. American Behavioral Scientist 45 (3): 476–495. Illouz, Eva. 1997. Consuming the Romantic Utopia: Love and the Cultural Contradictions of Capitalism. Berkeley: University of California Press. Kasser, Tim. 2004. The Good Life or the Goods Life? Positive Psychology and Personal Well-Being in the Culture of Consumption. In Positive Psychology in Practice, ed. P. Linley and S. Joseph, 55–68. Hoboken, NJ: Wiley. Livingstone, Sonia, Giovanna Mascheroni, and Elisabeth Staksrud. 2018. European Research on Children’s Internet Use: Assessing the Past and Anticipating the Future. New Media & Society 20 (3): 1103–1122. Maslow, Abraham Harold. [1943] 1968. A Theory of Human Motivation. Psychological Review 50 (4): 370. McGee, Micki. 2005. Self Help Inc.: Makeover Culture in American Life. New York: Oxford University Press. Okdie, Bradley M., and David R. Ewoldsen. 2018. To Boldly Go Where No Relationship Has Gone before: Commentary on Interpersonal Relationships in the Digital Age. The Journal of Social Psychology 158 (4): 508–513. Peterson, Richard A., and Roger M. Kern. 1996. Changing Highbrow Taste: From Snob to Omnivore. American Sociological Review 61 (5): 900–907. Pollay, Richard W. 1986. The Distorted Mirror: Reflections on the Unintended Consequences of Advertising. Journal of Marketing 50: 18–36. Schwartz, Barry. 2004. The Paradox of Choice: Why More Is Less. New York: Harper Perennial. Selberg, Torunn. 1993. Television and Ritualization of Everyday Life. The Journal of Popular Culture 26 (4): 3–10. Silverstone, Roger. 1994. Television and Everyday Life. Oxon: Routledge. Statista. 2016. Average Daily TV Viewing Time Per Person in Selected Countries Worldwide in 2016. https://www.statista.com/statistics/276748/averagedaily-tv-viewing-time-per-person-in-selected-countries/. Accessed May 2017. Stebbins, Robert A. 2001. Serious Leisure. Society 38 (4): 53–57. Vanman, Eric J., Rosemary Baker, and Stephanie J. Tobin. 2018. The Burden of Online Friends: The Effects of Giving up Facebook on Stress and Well-Being. The Journal of Social Psychology 158 (4): 496–507.

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Verduyn, Philippe, Oscar Ybarra, Maxime Résibois, John Jonides, and Ethan Kross. 2017. Do Social Network Sites Enhance or Undermine Subjective Well-Being? A Critical Review. Social Issues and Policy Review 11 (1): 274–302. Williams, Raymond. 1974. Television: Technology and Cultural Form. London and New York: Routledge.

CHAPTER 8

The Social Self

Whether directed at personal pleasure or hard work on the self-project, many free time activities that we have seen so far, reflected a discourse of individualism and a culture that places the self at its center. That is to say, what participants did and how they related to those activities, suggested that much of free time was directed at the self with motives of pleasure, relaxation, self-work or self-cultivation. Additionally, participants saw time for oneself as a desirable feature of free time, allowing them to escape the stress of day-to-day commitments as well as providing them with an opportunity to fulfill personal needs. Consequently, it was surprising to find that social interaction was central to many free time practices. In other words, despite the emphasis on the self, it seems that people still find time and value time spent with others. Moreover, in light of the widespread perception that real interaction, as opposed to digital interaction, is declining, these findings were unexpected, suggesting that we are not as isolated from each other as we may think. Indeed, the social self emerged as an active agent for whom social engagement was highly valued. Spending time with others was perceived as both worthy as well as being indicated as a source of pleasure. Also, it was not experienced as a hindrance to the individual’s sense of freedom. The following two sub-chapters examine the social self, exploring free time practices associated with family life, friends and others. The quantitative findings presented in Chapter 5, indicated that a significant part of participants’ free time was spent with others. This included everyday interaction in the private domain, as well as outings that involved © The Author(s) 2019 M. Shir-Wise, Time, Freedom and the Self, Leisure Studies in a Global Era, https://doi.org/10.1007/978-3-030-13841-7_8

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socializing. I now examine social time more closely, focusing on how it is experienced and evaluated by participants. The first of the two sections is devoted to the family self as it investigates free time spent with spouses, children or extended family while the second explores social time with friends and interaction in the context of groups.

The Family Self Although much of the literature points to more time pressure and less time for family life (Bianchi et al. 2006; Jacobs and Gerson 2004; Roxburgh 2006), participants of the study reported spending substantial periods of free time with children and partners on a regular basis. Free time with family was experienced positively as opposed to time spent on family duties, which, as we saw in Chapter 4, was often perceived as a source of pressure. Many participants defined free time precisely as freedom from the pressures of domestic and childcare duties. While Chapter 4 presented participants’ descriptions of pressure associated with family commitments, I now explore family time from a different perspective, focusing on how free time is spent and the way it is experienced. How do people feel and talk about that time? To what extent is free time with family thought of as free, or is it, like committed time, envisaged as stressful? What is considered quality time? In what way might cultural models of parenting or couple relationships shape how family time is spent or perceived? Free Time with One’s Spouse Almost 90% of participants reported spending an average of 3 hours free time a day with their spouses, both in and out of the home. This time, more so than that spent with children, was perceived as free time. This included simply being together as well as joint activities or outings. Everyday Time Everyday free time was spent primarily in the private domain, and though presented as habituated, participants described shared time with spouses as positive. Being in each other’s company, talking and sharing a mundane activity were indicated as a pleasant part of daily routine. Beth explains that she and her husband don’t go out very much during the week since they both come home tired. She adds that her

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husband, who is a doctor, gets home late most evenings. For her, simply being together is enjoyable. In the evening we are together. We like to be together… but for us, even if we simply stay home and don’t do anything, its fun to be together. We don’t need … not friends and not too much going out …We don’t get bored from each other’s company.

Although staying home may be the result of external circumstances, the time spent together is positively experienced as they enjoy each other’s company. This is implied as evidence of a good relationship. Similarly Vera, whose husband is also a doctor, says he is “not willing” to go out. Yet she says she has recently “discovered” that, It’s actually nice at home, in my quiet. It’s not at all a bad way to spend time, to be cuddled up with my husband that’s also a good way to spend time. I don’t have to go out for that.

The image depicted by Vera is one of peacefulness and familiarity, which includes physical proximity and contact. On the one hand, just being in each other’s presence is presented as satisfying and pleasant. On the other hand, both Beth and Vera compare staying home to a more active alternative. Interestingly, the fact that they both use the negative form, “even if we… don’t do anything” or “I don’t have to go out for that,” suggests a need to justify staying home despite more attractive options. We shall see that activities outside the home were perceived as a worthwhile use of free time for couples. In the private domain, time with one’s spouse often involved a joint activity. Many specified television viewing, describing it as part of their evening routine, or a default for spending time with one’s partner. It was presented as requiring minimal effort and as a readily available alternative to going out when “you don’t have energy, sometimes even to think about it.” Some focused on sharing the activity, “it’s not together to talk, but it’s together for… that we enjoy something together.” It seems that the mutual focus of attention (Collins 2004) enhances the pleasure from the activity. For others, though television was a habituated activity for the couple, it did not preclude interaction while watching, as one participant said, “we talk about all sorts of things.”

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Indeed, communicating emerged as a central aspect of relationships, whether or not it was the primary or secondary activity. Unlike most participants, Yaffa, mother of 5, says that she and her husband rarely watch television. Being together involves devoting time to communicating with each other as well as goal-oriented activities that they share. She adds that they don’t go out often, thus much of their time together is spent at home. Her evening routine is described as such, Half past eight in the evening so we sit and chat, sit down and have coffee together…always do something whether it’s if we want to organize pictures, or if it’s things that we sit and plan…

Talking may be the very purpose of the interaction or it may be a by-product of another activity. Yet in both cases, the interaction involves sharing and mutual attention. Leah, mother of 4 young children, says her favorite free time activity is sitting with her husband over coffee. Describing this time, she says, “talking, advising with each other about all sorts of things or sharing or cuddling up while having coffee.” Drinking coffee together, as we saw in the previous quote, represents a ritual for the couple’s daily free time interaction. Just as television viewing was indicated as a transition into a free time mode, the coffee ritual may serve to mark the crossing of boundaries from committed time into free time for the couple. It is the framework for bringing them closer to each other both physically and psychologically, time devoted to the relationship, in which the couple simply discusses the day, sharing inner feelings and advising with each other. The intimacy is reinforced by the bodily contact of “cuddling up,” as we saw earlier. The communicative aspect of free time with one’s spouse was indicated as central to desirable relationships, as illustrated in the following. We talk a lot at night, after they go to bed, we find ourselves talking… or very early in the morning… We can be together lots. We’re good friends… we have a really good relationship. Really good.

Verbal interaction was presented as contributing to the quality of the couple’s connection, as a yardstick for measuring the quality of a relationship. Betty, who is going through a difficult period of bankruptcy,

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suggests that communication has a bonding effect that strengthens the connection, thereby helping them get through hard times. I do advise with B a lot. …whether it’s work, or personal life., all sorts of things… my husband and I are very, very unified and despite all the difficulties that we’re going through during this period, we are strong enough to deal with it together and that’s not something that goes without saying.

The ability to communicate meaningfully is indicated as a solid foundation for stability and unity. It is seen as giving the couple strength to cope with difficult situations. Yet a sense of companionship does not only mean partaking in serious conversations or advising with one another. The familiarity between couples may allow a “comfortable” interaction where one can relax the staged self required in less familiar interactions. Yaron, the travel agent who is greatly pressured by his “24/7” work demands, conveys a feeling of calmness when relating to his wife, saying, “With her I feel the most pleasure. The most comfortable and the most connected to her and the most tied. She is my best friend.” For Yaron, quality time with his spouse is not restricted to meaningful conversations. It can be simply spending time together doing mundane everyday activities. He adds, “You’ll laugh. Even shopping at the supermarket we do together. It’s a kind of ., a kind of spending time, a kind of quality time together.” Others spent time with their spouses while doing free time activities such as walking. This combination of personal investment together with cultivating the relationship with one’s spouse was also described as quality time. It combines many things. it’s good personally for each one of us and good for us as a couple…Those outings, that break to go out together so that we have quality time and also sport and health and also… it’s great. I highly recommend it.

In the same way as drinking coffee together emerged as a ritual devoted to the couple, here, sharing the pastime of walking allows a break so that the couple can be alone. The fact that the joint activity nurtures both the individual and the couple, enhances the quality of this time. Having time alone with one’s spouse may be particularly attractive to couples with younger children. This time together enables a certain freedom from the constant demands of children. As we have seen, the

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intimacy of being alone contributes to the relationship whether or not it is spent talking and drinking coffee or utilized for a shared activity. Abe, father of 4 children describes the evening ritual when he and his wife can be alone, saying, “At some stage we send our kids off, between 10 and 11 either to bed or to their stuff and then we have… we sit, drink, talk.” While being free from childcare duties may be implied to heighten the value of time spent as a couple, the term “quality time” is challenged. Abe says, “I believe in time and not in quality time. Simply time, shared time. You don’t even have to do something together, but just be in the same place, available for each other.” For Abe, it is not what the couple does, but the spatiotemporal sharing involved that contributes to a sense of closeness. Making Time Besides time spent together in the private domain or on routine activities such as walking, participants reported going on outings with their spouses. This generally involved a conscious effort to allot such time to spend together. As Yaffa says, “We try, once a week, once every ten days, to go to a movie. Sometimes it’s spontaneous.” Yaffa’s words suggest that assigning set times for going out together on a regular basis is considered worthy. This is evident in the word “try,” which was also used by other participants regarding outings. For some, having small children was seen as an obstacle to going out. Alon, who says that he and his wife don’t go out very often, explains, No energy. I believe that at some stage it will change, because the kids are very small, and they need attention from the moment they get up until the moment they go to bed.

Thus, going out demands initiative on their part, which, it seems, involves investing energy. Having young children is experienced as all-consuming, and as depleting their energy. While he is aware of the potential benefits of outings, Alon acknowledges the effort required to do so. Let’s say, if she and I say let’s go out now to a movie, a show, a play, just in the middle of the week, it won’t happen… if we did go out for sure we would enjoy ourselves, but the thing is… there’s no one to push it.

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The word “push” implies that Alon sees going out with one’s spouse as desirable, yet he recognizes the fact that external constraints, such as fatigue due to family circumstances, may prevent them from doing so. Besides having young children, other factors linked to work, were perceived as obstacles. Participants reported being too “tired from work” or getting home late. While, as we saw above, some participants presented themselves as happy to simply spend time together, others felt that the fact that they didn’t go out was detrimental to the relationship with their spouses. This may bring about feelings of guilt, as we see in Eden’s words, “I often feel very bad that I don’t have time for him, I don’t have time for our relationship…We used to go out for breakfast, it was relaxing.” Yet, she suggests that outings can only contribute to the couple’s relationship if work pressure does not interfere with the element of escape that is crucial to that time spent together. Now if we go what do we talk about? About pressure at work, about problems…it’s not enjoyable. Because, when we go, I want it to be quiet, a pleasure, relaxing…really our relationship is not invested in now.

As Eden sees it, relationships require investment on the part of the couple. Going out with one’s spouse and spending time in a relaxed setting is thought to be conducive to a good relationship. Yasmin, who, like Eden expresses a sense of time pressure throughout the interview, reports seldom going out with her husband because they are pressed for time. She says, “We hardly ever do anything without the kids, though we want to.” Yasmin regards this failure to go out with her husband as problematic, reflecting on the present as well as the future. It’s something that bothers me a lot and it’s detrimental. Because as soon as the children grew up, quality time with my husband got less and less and it’s very disturbing. So because of that, from time to time we try to go out together, but it doesn’t happen a lot. We make an effort but no, it’s not enough.

She, too, suggests that one must “try” by taking responsibility to invest in the relationship. Going out is thought of as quality time, therefore not managing to designate such time is perceived as a failure to invest in one’s relationship and thus experienced as “disturbing.” Interestingly, while we saw earlier that having young children limited going out with

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one’s spouse, due to fatigue and logistics, here, the failure to go out was indicated as linked to having older children. As we have seen, part of the appeal of such outings is to escape the domestic surroundings, which are associated with duties and stress. Therefore, when children are older, the need for the couple to go out together may become less urgent since they are able to spend time alone in the home. Abe addresses the irony of the situation saying, It used to be more important to go out. From the moment you don’t need a babysitter, you also don’t need to go out. It’s like I’ve been cheated. We waited and waited and now that we don’t need a babysitter, it’s not at all… it’s less relevant.

Perhaps, when children are young, besides the attraction of escaping the home and having time alone, the activity is perceived as desirable because of the very fact that it is difficult to attain. When it is more readily available, as we said of media consumption, it thus loses part of its appeal. While having young children was perceived as limiting one’s freedom to go out with one’s spouse, it was understood as a passing stage. Betty says she “would like to go out a bit more, like alone,” however, like Alon, she believes that the situation will change. When the kids become more independent and don’t live at home, then I think my life will change, change significantly. It’s already a different status, it’s already thinking about how to really pass the time more with your husband, with your husband and alone.

Betty suggests that as one’s children get older, it is important to think about the ways in which to spend time with one’s spouse. She contemplates the future and the implications of having more free time with her husband, which she envisages as a significant change in her life. Other participants adopted measures to ensure outings with their spouses. For example, many participants indicated theatre subscriptions as a means of allotting time to go out, as one explained, “So that we go out, we have a theatre subscription. So that… so there’s no choice.” Having a set framework thus spurs joint outings. Others said they try to set a regular evening for going out, though, as some pointed out, this was not always kept. While participants did report enjoying time together in the home, going out was found to be more highly valued as we see in the following.

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Supposedly every Thursday we go out. It works out once a month in the end (laughs)… As far as I’m concerned also sitting watching TV with M – that’s something we do once a week… it’s less quality time than going out.

On the one hand, spending time with one’s spouse in the private domain was presented in a positive light, yet going out was often considered an investment in one’s relationship, hence classifying it as quality time. Though outings during the week were associated with effort or making time, the weekends were described as more relaxed or fun. Liron, who has older children, reports spending time with his wife on weekends doing various activities. Friday is a fun day with L, so we just, sometimes just eat breakfast somewhere, talk…Saturday, if the weather’s good we always go for a walk… Saturday night we usually go out to a movie or friends.

While participants indicated talking as central in their everyday interactions with their spouses, it was not found to be the focal point of weekend interaction as Rona specifies, “On the weekends we’re together all the time. There’s definitely a feeling of togetherness when we’re together but it doesn’t mean sitting and talking.” This may be explained by the fact that many reported spending this time on joint activities such as eating, shopping or trips, so that the attention was, perhaps, focused on the activity while being shared with the spouse. It seems that these activities were experienced as using rather than passing the time. In this way, perhaps it was conceived as a greater utilization of time, which, as we saw in the chapter on the Productive Self, may add to its perceived value. Special Occasions Weekends, however, were also a time to go away together, an activity that was highly evaluated yet not a routine event, generally being linked to special occasions. Spending a weekend alone in a hotel or zimmer (guest room) or going overseas, were indicated as ways to celebrate anniversaries or birthdays. Besides going away, special occasions were celebrated by other planned outings such as restaurants, movies or spas. Examining how people celebrate special occasions may shed light on what is considered the ideal way for couples to spend time together. Much like the hypothetical questions presented in Chapter 5, that were

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designed to illuminate what is considered desirable and worthy, by relating to special occasions, it was hoped that this would reveal conceptions of the ultimate way to spend time with one’s partner. Indeed, these events were perceived, not only as a catalyst to spend time together, but also as deserving thought, money and time. Yaffa, mother of 5, says she and her husband like going out, but they “don’t go out much.” Special occasions, however, are considered worth the effort. We go out…it could be the beach, or some nice park…often it turns out being a café but… it could be a movie, but again, you know you have the date so you organize yourself. It’s not something that you say, I’m falling asleep, I won’t be able to stay up. That’s it, we make an effort.

As opposed to routinized time, when obstacles such as fatigue may prevent going out, special occasions are perceived as a must. As we have seen in Chapter 7, consumption was central to many free time practices. This was also evident in choices for special occasions. Going to restaurants, for example, was reported by most participants as a preferred way to celebrate. For Yaron, an important part of the experience is, not simply going out to eat with his wife, but also the fact that the food is special as is the atmosphere. He says, “alone, we go to some restaurant, eat something special, you know, not some Humus place … a glass of wine.” He differentiates between a “place” and a “restaurant.” The former is associated with ordinary, everyday routine, whereas in a restaurant one has special food and wine which suggests a change from habituated pastimes, as well as implying a classy, more highly valued setting, also associated with romance. While many participants specified going to restaurants and movies, others indicated spas, massages and hotels as a desirable way to celebrate special occasions. Unlike day-to-day time spent with a spouse, these celebrative practices emerged as more hedonic. Leah’s description of the kind of day she would like to spend with her husband includes a combination of activities. She says, “Go to a spa and then a restaurant and spend the day, let’s say at a hotel…that’s something I’d really like to do.” For Rona, a set practice for celebrating anniversaries has already been adopted. She describes the ritual saying,

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Anniversaries we go out together. We usually make a spa day. He takes off a day from work and we book a massage or something, It’s almost the standard that we do a massage and a restaurant.

As a ritual, it marks a significant event, following a set sequence and given a name- “a spa day.” This style of activity was often extended beyond a single day, becoming a weekend away. Unlike family holidays that were generally described as active and busy, most couples preferred a more relaxed, “pampering” kind of holiday when going alone. One participant describes such a weekend saying, “A weekend, in a zimmer. With pampering, I say pampering is massages and… jacuzzi …” Massages and spas were described as a means of spoiling oneself or one’s spouse, and thus considered to be an investment in the couple relationship. But, perhaps, no less important is the romantic image that they evoke. The more extravagant the gesture, the more romantic it may seem. Alon proudly recollects how he invested in his wife’s birthday, which included, not only a surprise trip overseas, but also romantic tokens of his love, given to her in the presence of others. He says enthusiastically, “Once I surprised her at school with a cake and flowers and a ticket to Barcelona.” Commercialized symbols of love such as surprise trips, secluded cabins in nature, flowers and cakes, are thus integral to special occasions and demonstrative of loving relationships. On the other hand, one participant, Yigal, resists such prescriptions for romance saying, “we are not the types for… formal events in our calendar…romance is for every day…if we feel like being together, we go out.” For Yigal, it is neither the time nor place that determine what is romantic. Free Time with the Family I now take a look at the way in which participants spend free time with their families. Like time with one’s spouse, almost 90% reported spending free time with their children on a regular basis. Yet, the average time per day when done was lower—less than 2 hours as opposed to 3 with a spouse. In addition, participants reported spending free time with family once or twice a week whereas time with one’s partner was reported as daily. It is important to note that this does not necessarily mean that less time is spent with children than with one’s wife or husband, but that less of that time is considered free time.

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Family was indicated as central to participants’ identities and an integral part of their self- presentation: “I really love the family. I am terribly much a family man” or “I’m very much a home mum and I love it.” In addition, it was considered a top priority when time is scarce. The mayor says, “The population is quite busy, from the point of view of personal careers, so in the time they have, their priority is family and not other directions, not other personal channels.” His words imply that due to heavy workloads, people in the town do not have an abundance of free time. Since family ranks high, this time, considered scarce, is used for family time. Being with one’s family was highly valorized, even described by many as their favorite time, as we saw in Chapter 5. Michal, for example says, “What do I like best? Again, being…being together, when all the family is together, it doesn’t matter what.” Liron, too, indicated time with his daughter and his wife as his favorite way of spending free time. He explains, The thing of bonding is very, very…it’s very, very important to me, that I wouldn’t give up. This thing. It’s a kind of thing, of the essence of the togetherness of family, It’s something really, really important.

For Liron, as for the other participants as we shall see, the family unit is highly valued, and shared time is thought of as a means to strengthen the ties within, and the unit as a whole. Everyday Time Much of the time spent with children or spouses in the home, involves duties and obligations and consequently not considered free time. As discussed in Chapter 4, the multiplicity of domestic chores and the demanding nature of childcare were experienced as never-ending. Participants perceived such duties as a burden, which compromises the individual’s freedom. Hence, children and housework were associated with stress, making free time all the more desirable and valued. How, then, was free time with family spent and experienced? The two most dominant regular free time practices with children, reported by participants, were watching television and eating together. Both served as a site for family interaction. Although commensality may not be thought of as a free time practice, participants indicated it as quality time for the family.

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As we have seen, television viewing was a routine activity in most households. Many described it as a shared activity with a common focus, yet it was also experienced as an arena for interaction as well as promoting a sense of togetherness. Participants implied an added value to television viewing when shared with the family, “Usually, if we’re already watching, we watch something together.” Oren, who says watching television is part of the family’s evening routine, points out that his children have an option of watching separately, “There is a TV in the kids’ room but we all watch on the main TV.” The fact that they “all” watch is presented as a choice. Moreover, the mutual focus of attention generates interaction between family members. Thus, it is not simply a matter of sharing the activity, but it is perceived as a trigger for verbal communication. Liron highlights the conversational aspect that is integrated into watching television together with his daughter, “if it’s Masterchef, there’s always something to talk about and if it’s The Voice, there’s always something to talk about.” Similarly, Denny indicates family interaction as contributing to the pleasure derived from the practice. He paints a picture of family time that members look forward to since it is experienced as fun as well as interactive. We watch School for Music together. When it starts, everybody calls each other, ‘come come, it’s started.’ Eretz Nehederet we watch everyone together and we all laugh … It’s being together, each expresses his opinion and you see dynamics. It’s not some cinema where everyone is silent and that.

This family activity is presented, not as a default, but rather as one that is consciously chosen and adopted as a bonding ritual with “everyone together.” The high value attached to verbal interaction was found to be intricately linked with the perceived worth of being together. “What I like is the being together. Whether it’s a restaurant or… even at home when suddenly one comes out of his room and we talk a bit and there’s interaction.” Communication may take part during an organized free time activity or it may be spontaneous, but in both cases the copresence of the family members is what enables interaction. Another activity that highlighted being together was family meals, which was mentioned by a large number of participants. This practice was associated with a positive conception of family time, as Zack says,

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“we eat lunch together, it’s nice.” Betty suggests that eating together is an opportunity to spend time together “because during the day” she and her husband “are not around.” Madlyn, mother of two young children, explains why she insists on being with them during meals. I remember in my childhood…they’re the things you remember as an adult what I liked at home, it was eating with my parents…I also sit with them, but I don’t eat with them because I wait for L (her husband)…but I do sit with them at the table.

Even though she eats later with her husband, for Madlyn, just being with her children while they eat is perceived a significant part of childhood experience. This is not to say that shared meals were idyllic. Since mealtimes are considered an opportunity for verbal interaction, external interruptions are perceived as an obstacle that impairs the quality of that time together. Michal, mother of 3, describes the problem of cellphones, saying, “You know even at dinner every second they’re on Whatsapp. It’s crazy!…every second, N looks every second and it’s very hard. I tell him, ‘leave it for a second. Let’s talk.’” Michal sees this as a violation of sacred family time that should be devoted to exclusive communication between members of the family. The continual interruptions are experienced as difficult to accept, thus requiring an effort on her part to combat the invasion of family time. If commensality is thought of as an opportunity to spend time with one’s family, then the failure to do so, may be construed as a negative reflection on the quality of family life. Rona says apologetically, “We hardly ever eat together. It’s not nice and not educational but we got used to it like that.” She feels a need to justify not having meals together so she adds, “each one gets time at a different time.” Rona implies that her children do not suffer, since the time is given to them on other occasions. Yet her words suggest a sense of guilt associated with a failure to do what is “nice” or “educational.” Good parenting is regarded as giving time to one’s children, and eating together is conceived as an opportunity to do so. Weekend Free Time Although commensality was considered worthwhile, not all participants reported eating together as a daily activity. However, family weekend

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meals were reported by all participants as a regular practice that was considered worth insisting on. This was often shared with extended family and seen as an integral part of family time. Relating to family meals, Efrat says, “We try, but less. But on weekends we insist. Friday night dinner and Shabbat1 together.” Unlike weekday meals, the weekend meals are presented as an activity not to be missed under any circumstances. As we saw above, the words “try” and “insist” indicate a conscious effort to ensure shared time, implying the perceived importance of weekend commensality. Ilana, like Efrat uses the word insist, saying, “The only meal we eat together really all of us is Friday night. That we insist on. And Saturday lunch. And we eat alone, that’s our fun.” Being able to spend time together as a family unit, is perceived as enjoyable and worth insisting on. Moreover, even those who did report eating together on a daily basis, implied a special quality associated with weekend meals, as Itai, father of 3, points out, “we have time every day. Dinner is family time…Friday night is pure family time.” The addition of the word “pure,” suggests a distinction between weekday meals and Friday dinner, which may be conceived as uninterrupted, unconstrained time, allowing the time to be completely devoted to the family. The weekend family meals are experienced as, not simply enjoyable but also as meaningful. Denny, father of 3 older children describes the weekly practice saying, We have a very meaningful meal on Friday night. On a significant day because that’s what they wait for and the kids really like all the Friday meals because it’s a meal where we all sit together and also there are good, tasty things…

The children look forward to the weekly event, with its special food and the company of the family, which may contribute to a sense of meaningfulness. The togetherness is felt on Saturday morning too when, “the kids come down, we sit and everyone has a nibble, whether we’re hungry or not. And then everyone sits, everyone eats but…they like the being together.” The repetition of the word “everyone” suggests that the presence of all family members intensifies the feeling of familial closeness. Here, rather than being presented as “meaningful,” the relaxed atmosphere is characterized by casual informality. Others pointed to the formality of Friday night dinner as enhancing the experience. Manny, who works shifts, describes weekend dinners with his wife and 3 children as the “highlight”

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of his week. He indicates the Kiddush, the traditional blessing on the wine, and the cooking beforehand, as part of the pleasure derived from the practice. Indeed, the fact that it is associated with sanctity and tradition may contribute to the festive atmosphere associated with the Sabbath meals as well as a feeling of meaningfulness. The mood is one of relaxation, which the weekend timing allows. There is a sense of escape from the rushed routine of the day-to-day. For religious families, the feeling of release was heightened by the abstinence from electronic technology. Oren, father of 5 children, who leads a religious lifestyle, describes it as such, “Shabbat comes in, it’s quiet…we sit down to dinner, there’s time to talk, there’s time to play. Shabbat is different. No emails, no TV. Excellent.” Unlike weekdays, the Shabbat is experienced as a day when “there’s time” for the family. Talking and playing are experienced as quality time since there are no external interruptions. Yaffa, religious mother of 5, describes Shabbat as “great” and “relaxed,” also referring to talking and playing with her children. Similarly, Daniel, religious and father of 5, uses superlatives to describe time spent playing with his children on Shabbat. Playing with them on Shabbat is the highlight of my week. I love it! We sit down and play cards the four of us, …and we have a ball! We laugh and we play, that’s for pleasure.

Family time together is conceived as something to look forward to. The above quotes uncover a distinction between weekdays and Shabbat, which participants experience as being imbued with a special quality that allows family time that is highly valorized. Perhaps being free from external constraints contributes to a sense of relaxation but also to a feeling that one has the freedom to devote time to meaningful things, namely the family. As well as being a time for family interaction in the home, weekends were also described as a time for family outings. The most common activities reported by participants were trips and picnics. This included day trips as well as weekend vacations. On the one hand, like weekend family time in the private domain, such outings were experienced as a means of release from the day-to-day, as Ofrah describes them, “without pressure.” On the other hand, while weekend time in the home was portrayed as quiet and relaxed, family outings were described by many as

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active and challenging. Eran, father of 2, expresses his thoughts on the various benefits of such trips. If it’s nature trips, it’s first of all the being together and the challenges on the way and situations that develop that don’t usually develop in the home. I don’t know, it’s fun, just fun, I think it’s bonding, very much bonds and very much connects.

For Eran, two major factors contribute to the pleasure derived from nature trips with the family. The first, a feeling of belonging, is considered a crucial element, as is the second, a change from everyday interaction, which is experienced as challenging. These contribute to enjoyment as well as to a sense of bonding between family members. Indeed, many participants reported going on family trips to nature, an arena implied as conducive to connecting the family. Itai suggests that a sense of togetherness, is both the goal and result of these trips. He says, “We try to feel together, we travel a lot in nature, including camping out. Yes, we do jeep trips, we sleep out in a tent, in nature. That’s how we bond with each other more.” It seems that leaving the private domain may change the family dynamics and that being in nature may serve to help disconnect from the routine of everyday life. Moreover, the shared activities in such a setting may require a level of cooperation that is perhaps, more willingly accepted and perceived as enjoyable. There are fewer external interruptions since the family is alone, which, in addition, enables mutual attention to the family members, as Abe, father of 4 points out, We mostly travel the family alone… when you go with friends then you divide up according to age, adults and children, and if you go as a family then you have to function as a family unit. We like travelling as a family unit. It’s good time for the family….it’s a different type of bonding and attentiveness.

The exclusivity of the family being alone, ensures interaction within the unit and the bonding that occurs as a result, contributes to a sense of quality time, as Denny suggests, “We do it just us. It’s great fun. It’s like really sort of you know, quality family time.” Not only was time with the nuclear family considered valuable but so too was time spent with extended family. The most common occasion

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for these meetings was Shabbat or holiday meals. For Beth, mother of 5, Friday night dinners with all the family are of utmost importance. … the kids know they have to stay, after Kiddush they’re allowed to go…I wait for it every Friday, I fight with my brothers if it doesn’t work out for them to come. Even if it rains and they don’t feel like getting up I make them all come. It’s my life.

Beth sees these tribal-like gatherings as essential and meaningful, thus she takes on the responsibility of having them in her home and insisting that all are present. The words, “It’s my life,” leave no room for doubt as to the deep meaning of family for Beth. Neta, too, takes on the role of organizing the family for Jewish holiday gatherings, saying, “If I don’t do it, it won’t happen. Family ties should be kept.” Presented as a precept, Neta’s words suggest that keeping in touch with family is taken for granted as desirable. Besides that, visiting grandparents is allotted a weekly time. She reports going to her mother, together with her husband and children, every Friday night, and to her husband’s mother, every Saturday night. Visiting parents was reported as a regular practice among many participants and often these meetings included members of the extended family as well. Zack, father of three, describes the feeling of kinship and the positive experience for all those who take part in the gathering. My kids love going to my parents and seeing my siblings and cousins and… we have an excellent relationship between the siblings, really fantastic… There are six of us… When we meet, we are like little kids…we can sit and laugh and talk and listen to music together and …it’s great fun.

The atmosphere is one of togetherness and enjoyment. There is a sense of release and authenticity as the family members revert to being “like little kids,” enhancing the feeling of fun. Other participants indicated outings and weekend holidays as the site for spending time with siblings. These meetings were of a more intimate nature as they did not entail the participation of large numbers of family members. Describing outings with her siblings, Leah says, “it’s something I really enjoy. Sitting with my siblings, chatting, talking, going out. We try to go out from time to time.” Though these are not regular outings, Leah indicates the pleasure derived from the relaxed interaction at these meetings. This connection

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with family emerged as a significant element of free time, particularly during weekends. Liron, whose family lives in a nearby town, visits his siblings, his married daughter and grandchildren every week. Debra, whose mother lives two hours away, says that they often go to sleep there for the weekend. Another means of contact with parents and siblings was telephone calls. For Maddy, talking to her mother or sisters on the telephone is considered free time. Female participants, in particular, reported speaking to their mothers every day. Even Madlyn, whose mother lives overseas, said she talks to her daily, though the distance troubles her. She says, “If I could change something, that would be the first thing I would change.” The fact that her parents do not live in Israel, came up in the interview as distressing for Madlyn, perhaps implying the preference for face-to-face interaction. Only one male participant reported regular phone calls with his brothers. Daniel says, I have phone calls with my brothers, usually I have phone calls from one or more of them or I call them, can be several times. G, I speak to a few times a day usually. His wife calls me the other woman.

For Daniel, as we saw in the other quotes, the connection does not appear to be linked to a sense of commitment but rather experienced as a source of pleasure and motivated by a genuine desire to maintain a close relationship. It is possible that some perceived family visits as a matter of duty but this did not come up in the interviews, perhaps due to the emphasis on free time. Just as family ties were nurtured through regular communication by phone or weekend gatherings, so too were they cultivated through special occasions. Children’s birthdays, for example, were often celebrated in the company of grandparents. As we have said, since these o ­ ccasions are thought of as special, they shed light on perceptions of what is desirable and worth investing in, thus I now explore the manner in ­ which participants mark such occasions. Special Occasions All participants considered birthdays an event to be celebrated in some way or another. As Ofrah says, “there are things we don’t miss.” These occasions were perceived as worth investing in, whether in the intimate surroundings of the home, or in the public domain.

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Although Eden, mother of 5, describes herself as pressured, saying she doesn’t have time or energy for entertaining guests, when relating to birthdays she states, “We put effort into it, yes. Either we go to a restaurant or we do something here at home and all the kids come…Birthdays are very important to us.” For Eden, birthdays are considered significant, regarded as an opportunity for all the family to come together, thus justifying the effort. Besides going to restaurants, often with grandparents or extended family, some families preferred to celebrate in the home. Presents were indicated as an essential part of the ritual as was decorating the home. Often the element of surprise contributes to the drama of the occasion. Dana, mother of 4, says she comes from a home “where they don’t make a big deal,” however, in her own home the family has adopted a set ritual. She describes it saying, “whoever has a birthday, we surprise in the morning, the kids, with balloons and chocolate.” Indeed, birthdays were treated as an intimate ceremony that follows a fixed course of events and requires props that enhance the occasion. Rona describes the sequence of the practice as it is performed in her family. We have a little family ceremony- whoever has a birthday we surprise, for the nine hundred thousandth time, everyone knows (laughs). We decorate the house at night and wake him with songs and congratulations and presents. We give them in the morning, still in pajamas. And we usually go to a restaurant with the family, also with the grandfather and grandmother.

The ritual is repeated annually in a set format, with the setting prepared in advance. Songs and presents add to the formal course of the ceremony yet the mention of pajamas stresses the intimacy of close family. Other participants noted signs and cakes in the list of props for the performance, with all pointing to the ceremonial nature that was presented as a family “custom,” as one participant put it. The performance, like that of many rituals, was reported by participants as being repeated from year to year and involving special texts, music and food. Perhaps this ritualistic celebration heightens a sense of solidarity between family members as well as being perceived as an opportunity to dedicate time and effort to “spoil the person,” as one participant said. We shall see, that both solidarity and individual attention are perceived as essential elements in conceptions of quality time with the family.

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Quality Time Many participants used the term “quality time,” but what characterizes quality time with one’s family? Is it simply a matter of being in each ­other’s presence or is fun also a crucial ingredient? Indeed, these two ­factors emerged as central to family activities and, as we have seen, many practices were found to generate a sense of belonging and togetherness. However, neither pleasure nor being together were considered sufficient to classify the time as quality time. Daniel, father of 5, ponders the complexity of the notion, highlighting the importance of connecting. … being able to know the difference between spending time and spending quality time with people, not very simple. It’s not very simple, like you can spend time with someone but not really connect with them. Between you and the kids and you and your spouse, you spend a lot of time with them but you are not really communicating or connecting in any way. There is a big difference between the two.

For Daniel, it is not enough to just be together. What distinguishes time as quality time is the element of communication, which serves to strengthen relationships whether with one’s spouse or children. He compares family quality time today with that of his childhood, saying, “quality time was watching TV together.” This observation accentuates the change in the approach to parenting, which emphasizes the importance of communication as opposed to just being together. Interaction with family members was found to be valued as worthy even through electronic devices as we saw in the previous chapter. Adina, talks of the positive aspect of cellphones as she relates to the family’s connection through a family group on Whatsapp. While she is aware that the interaction may be somewhat trivial, this does not detract from the significance of communication. She describes the way it is used saying, They send photos from where they are, even the soldiers here and there. It’s an amazing form of communication. When they’re allowed. Only when they’re allowed…even though it’s babbling it’s haha and ah and that. So… so it’s still communication between them. I see it as very important.

The technology that enables sharing experiences through photos, or joking between themselves, is thus perceived as a means for bonding

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through communication, as frivolous as it may seem. Yet Adina is conscious of her role as a parent in promoting rules thus she makes sure to stress the fact that her children only use Whatsapp when it is “allowed.” Though it may not be considered quality time, it is clear that any form of communication between family members is, nevertheless perceived as desirable. However, face-to-face verbal interaction, particularly between parent and child, was indicated as the ultimate component of quality time. Just as communication was considered a highly valued feature in couple relationships, the same was found regarding parent–child interaction. Neta suggests that the presence of a parent has no meaning without interaction. I think that if a mum and her child are at home and each is in his room on the computer and she… it doesn’t matter if I’m at home or not at home. It doesn’t have any meaning…I do try, from time to time, to make conversation time with him, or trips together.

It seems that for Neta, a mother must “make” time to devote to her child. It is not adequate just being there, if the time together does not include verbal interaction and attention toward the child. Her words suggest a child-centered view of quality time, which a parent must “try” to achieve. While she implies that the amount of time spent at home is not what matters, a sense of guilt is apparent in relation to her work hours. She says, “I’m home too little and that’s something I don’t feel good about. And as much as I try to get home earlier, it doesn’t work out.” She stresses the fact that she makes an effort to be home more, which, perhaps is experienced as failure since it “doesn’t work out.” Debra, mother of 4, contemplates the question of quantity versus quality, emphasizing the importance of the mother’s presence in the home. She says, “I know there is that thing quality time and quantity time? I believe in quantity time. I don’t think it can be replaced by quality time.” For Debra, her belief in quantity time is also rooted in a conception of child-centered parenting where the child comes “first.” She explains the outlook that guides her style of mothering. I always had to be at home with them, be with them many hours. Otherwise I felt that… never, even when I worked in hi-tech… As far as they’re concerned, I didn’t work. My kids., like the hours that I work,

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they’re not at home either so it’s not… so work is not at their expense. As far as I’m concerned they come first. But it’s not that we sit and play all day because the house is managed. They do their stuff, I do my stuff. I am available all the time to talk to them, to hear what’s happening…but I feel good about it, good that I’m at home. The presence is important to me.

On the one hand, Debra stresses the fact that spending time with her children, need not be devoted to free time activities such as playing. On the other hand, her availability by being in the home, is considered valuable, because this enables communication with her children who can share “what’s happening.” It seems that it is the verbal interaction combined with her presence that makes her “feel good.” This emphasis on verbal communication emerged particularly among female participants. Yehudit, a home mum, says she manages to speak to her children and have “lots and lots of personal conversations,” which she says, “depends on time.” Like Debra, she believes that the fact that she is “available” enables such interaction. In particular, conversations of a personal nature were more highly valued. Children’s sharing of thoughts or feelings was indicated as contributing to positive feelings among mothers, as Adina, who has 5 children, points out, “when the kids share something, I feel good about myself. I don’t think that’s trivial.” It seems that children’s affinity for sharing was conceived as an indication of good mothering, thereby contributing to feelings of self-worth. It was of no consequence whether this exchange took place in the private or public domain. The focus was on the meaningful interaction. Maddy, for example, also mother of 5, illustrates what she considers quality time with her children. Like let’s say I go out with one of the kids and … you know they started telling me things about their week or about things that are happening or how they feel then you know it’s like quality time.

Interestingly, the above relates to an outing with one child, which may suggest that individual attention contributes to the quality of the interaction. It seems that free time is perceived by Maddy as an opportunity for strengthening the mother–child connection. Similarly, Beth, mother of 4, experiences meaningful conversations with her daughter as an accomplishment. She says, “if I just sit cuddled up with them and talk to them about life then I have done something.” The bodily contact and

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the profundity of talking “about life,” are felt to, not only strengthen the relationship between mother and daughter, but also experienced as a sense of achievement as a parent. As we saw in couple relationships, if a certain action is valued, it thus warrants effort to ensure that it occurs. Specifically, spending time together was valued as contributing to relationships. In the same way, in order to assure quality time with children, some parents made conscious decisions to devote time to their children, particularly individual time. Amos, father of twin infants, expresses the need to give his 6-year-old daughter personal attention saying, For us it’s hard (having twin babies) but she (older daughter) has been hurt by this whole situation. So I have decided, my decision is that I give her, from the minute they go to bed, … we talk a lot …if there’s all sorts of things she wants to show me and stuff like that, a bit of time to tell me how her day went at school, show me a bit, and that’s it… now she really needs it, really needs the warmth, also the attention.

This child-centered approach links individual attention and personal interaction with warmth. The parent feels he must “give” the child undivided attention, which encourages verbal communication whereby the child shares her experiences of the day. The use of the word “needs,” and the fact that it is repeated, suggests that these elements of child-rearing are considered essential components, without which the parent may not be fulfilling his/her role in a worthy manner. Both mothers and fathers adopted rituals designed to give their children individual attention. Zack, father of three young children, has decided to devote personal time to each child. For him, the emphasis is on spending time with them while participating in a joint activity. Spending time with family is very important to me – not the committed time, but the free time, For example, I just started a new thing- taking each kid and doing something with each one- it can be watching a movie together, going horse riding… But it’s new, let’s see if it lasts.

As Zack sees it, free time, as opposed to committed time, should be fun. But beyond the enjoyment of the shared activity, he clearly considers giving individual time to each child as worthwhile in itself, so much so, that it brought about the initiation of a “new thing.” Participants indicated

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sharing various free time activities with children, with the parent often allowing the child to choose an activity of his/her choice. This was described as “a fun day,” that is devoted to one child only. Liron, for example, refers to a set day each week designated as such, characterized by interaction and time with his daughter. He says, “it’s nice to talk to her too, it’s nice spending time together.” As with special occasions, fun days with children were found to be centered around consumption, which included outings to malls where they reported seeing movies, eating at fast food restaurants and purchasing a variety of goods. Family holidays, as we have seen, were also associated with quality family time. Here too, a child-centered approach was evident as many participants indicated that vacations revolved exclusively around the needs of the children. Adina says simply, “We don’t look for what interests us, that is, we first of all do what interests them…Still… we are theirs, we are still theirs.” Her words suggest, not only a child-centered view, but also that this is at the expense of the parents’ needs. The use of a possessive pronoun demonstrates ownership, where the parents are owned and perhaps ruled by the children. This was also evident in the words of Ofrah, mother of 2 who says, “Until the kids leave the nest, we are dictated by their clocks.” Another mother says, “we hardly ever do anything without the kids, though we’d like to.” This prioritizing of children’s needs above those of parents suggests an element of self-sacrifice in child-centered parenting, likely to affect family free time as well as personal free time. Interestingly, this was not expressed with resentment. On the contrary, unlike committed time, it was portrayed as a matter of choice and a source of pleasure. Yaffa makes a point of clarifying her freedom of choice, saying, “Often you don’t have time for yourself…It’s choices, it’s very much a matter of choice.” Indeed, throughout the interview she stresses her parenting style as self-sacrificing yet presents it as a life philosophy that she chooses. Adina links her selfless mothering to the ages of her children, which may make it easier for her to accept her role “happily.” She says, “I guess it’s like that till the kids are big. You give up on things for yourself and not with a feeling of anger or being taken advantage of or anything like that. It’s a pleasure, happily.” This sense of acceptance was evident in the words of most participants. Despite many of the pressures linked to domestic duties and childcare, the family self emerged as central to one’s happiness, as we shall see in Chapter 9.

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The idea of parenting as self-sacrificing was expressed primarily among female participants. Leah, whose 4 children are young, like Adina, relates to the present as a transitory period of her life that requires self-sacrifice. She says plainly, “I’m overloaded because when kids are little you’re always overloaded…I admit that often I give up things for myself… I suppose that will change after I…in a few years.” Clearly, her role as mother is experienced as reducing personal free time. Yet she, too, sees herself as an autonomous agent whose approach to motherhood is chosen freely. Referring to her one day off from work, she explains why she keeps her one-year-old at home, rather than sending her to kindergarten. It’s a matter of choice…but it’s something in that motherly thing that you say, what she won’t be with me?… I could take the day for myself…I’m sure others would probably do it…maybe it’s at some point too much, but I’m very…the parental thing with me is something that is very total.

While she believes that her “total” mothering is a matter of choice, when comparing herself to others, she wonders whether it is “too much.” At the same time, her words suggest a sense of superiority over the “others” for whom, perhaps, the “parental thing” is not “total.” It seems that social comparison is used to measure one’s success as a mother. Yet, this can give rise to an inner conflict between satisfying the self or one’s children as we see in Yaffa’s words, On the one hand, I see people getting loads done and I won’t tell you that it, sometimes, doesn’t make me jealous. Wow, how do these people get so much done? On the other hand, I say to myself, there are those mums who are capable of going out, the kids at home, they’re not interested in anything, I’m going here, I’m going there. And I’m not like that…

It seems that Yaffa is torn between a wish to be free to satisfy her own desires and her ideology of motherhood. While she says she is “jealous” of mothers who get a lot done, the fact that she sees them as “not interested in anything,” seems to imply criticism of their mothering style, and perhaps a sense of superiority. Despite the element of self-sacrifice, for Yaffa, being a mother is experienced as a source of pleasure and as contributing to her sense of self-realization.

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One of my absolute pleasures at this stage of my life is being at home for L (her youngest daughter). Now it’s hard to understand. It sounds like… it sounds like today, everyone needs self-realization. I really feel good with this realization as a mum.

As she continues we see that this may mean compromising her free time, though she accepts this as part of her motherhood as we see in the example she presents, I love just popping over to a girlfriend to sit with her over a cup of coffee…I won’t leave the house and say to L, well kids, I’m going now, I’m going to sit over a coffee, I can’t do it. I can’t as a mother, I don’t feel good about it, understand?

These words imply a feeling of self-sacrifice, particularly in light of the repeated use of the negative form. On the one hand, the word “can’t” suggests a lack of choice due to her role as a mother, which, in turn generates a sense of guilt just thinking about putting her needs above those of her children. Yet she acknowledges the price of her style of mothering saying, “kids are at the expense of something, there’s no doubt and there isn’t… and…at the end, the investment in children is the most… I see it as the most worthwhile investment…it has results. The kids are good.” Yaffa sees a direct correlation between “investment” in one’s children and “results.” In this way, achieving the goals of parenting is seen as, not only important but also as a worthwhile investment. Motherhood was perceived as goal-oriented and the achievement of goals was valued as worthy. Those participants whose children were older acknowledged how this has affected their free time. Efrat, a full time psychologist, observes the difference between having younger or older children. Since the kids have grown you have much more space. You can’t compare it…you don’t have …the physical burden, besides the emotional… It also depends how you relate to raising children. When they were little, I played with them, I did stuff and went out like… the more active you are, an active mother so… it takes more time.

Like Leah, on the one hand, she expresses a feeling of overload that parents of young children clearly experience. On the other hand, she

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conveys a sense of pride in her style of “active” mothering, which incorporates playing, going out and doing things with one’s children, despite the fact that it “takes more time.” Central to active parenting was a responsibility to shape children’s values and promote behaviors that were conceived as a valuable use of time. By examining this aspect of parenting, besides shedding light on parenting ideologies adopted by participants, it gives us insight into their conceptions of worthy free time, which they wish to inculcate in their children. Some reported adopting certain practices as a means of educating children, while others advocated verbal communication. Relating to the question of free time, one mother says, There is a lot of discussion about the topic of free time…every summer the children had a timetable…we left a day without anything, neither TV or computer. On principle so that she knows how to fill the.… … the approach that you have to, that… a person doesn’t… doesn’t consciously burn his time… so I say that’s something very, very important that this is a topic of discussion because there is tons and tons of wasted time… this comes from lots and lots of discussion, talking about the topic. Of course it’s also setting an example…

She indicates communication, practical intervention and setting an example, as methods for instilling the valuable principles of utilizing time wisely and avoiding wasting time. In order to ensure that time was used in a desirable way, parents took on the role of supervisor as an important part of parental responsibility. The use of electronic technology emerged as requiring parents’ attention. Debra believes in setting clear boundaries as we see in the way she relates to television viewing, saying, “I limit the kids, block certain channels that I don’t like.” Her intervention is presented as, not simply controlling her children’s behavior, but as educating them about the worthy use of free time. She explains, “The little one watches, but, let’s say when friends come… there’s no TV. I don’t allow it. I tell him, friends come to play, not to watch TV.” In this way, Debra is educating her son about socially acceptable behavior, the importance of interaction and the management of free time. Family meals, as we have seen, were considered to be an opportunity for family time. Consequently, parents considered it their duty to ensure this practice. Itai, father of 3 is adamant about it, saying, “There is no such thing with me that they go eat at friends on Friday. We eat together. By me

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during eating, I don’t allow anyone to bring a phone to the table.” As we saw in the previous chapter, the family rule not to allow cellphones at the dinner table was seen as a means of disciplining children’s habits. Here, it is clear that the rule is designed to ensure pure, undivided family time. Similarly, Neta, who insists that there are no phones during Shabbat dinners, uses the expression “There’s no such thing” to convey her strictness on the matter. She discloses the rationale behind the “principle” saying, “so that it doesn’t destroy family time. I did find myself leading processes like that because if there are principles that are important to me, I am not willing to give in on them.” For Neta, limiting the use of cellphones during family time is a means of conveying her beliefs regarding family, which, for her, is an important value to be impressed on her children. But it is also a statement about the worthy use of free time. The integration of the two is what justifies her intervention and insistence on the observance of the weekly ritual. Gender Roles At this point, I must briefly note a number of observations related to the family self. Firstly, participants’ descriptions of their daily routine, suggested that the division of domestic roles was not equally distributed between husbands and wives. Female participants reported greater multitasking, and the performance of never-ending consecutive duties as we saw in Chapter 4. The male participants, on the other hand, generally described tasks that were limited to mornings or evenings. A number said they feel they should “help” more in the house. I have chosen not to expand here on findings related to domestic roles for a number of reasons. Firstly, I have discussed the stress associated with domestic duties in Chapter 4, though the focus was not specifically on gender inequality. Secondly, I shall relate to gender differences that emerged in the study, in the general discussion in the last chapter. Thirdly, as we saw in Chapter 2, many studies have investigated the pressures of work and family, multitasking and gender inequality. In this respect, the current findings are not surprising. Lastly, and perhaps more importantly in light of the nature of the present study, household chores and childcare are not part of free time, though they may influence it. I would, however, like to note an interesting absence that was apparent in connection to these findings. Despite the unequal division of domestic and childcare duties, not one participant mentioned gender

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inequality. It would be expected that at least some women would mention, if not complain about what might generally be perceived as an unfair division of roles, yet such comments did not emerge during the interviews. In addition, very few participants reported disagreements or conflict involving children or spouses. Only three mothers implied disharmony in the home and in each case, rather than voicing disapproval or displeasure from a child’s or spouse’s behavior, it emerged as selfcriticism. Maddy, mother of 5 says, “I would firstly like to be much more calm, calmer, especially when it comes to my children sort of, you know, get irritated less.” Similarly, Ilana’s wish to be “a bit more relaxed, a little more… get angry at the kids less” suggests a desire to be the ideal mother who remains calm at all times. Perhaps, then, the absence of remarks relating to gender equality or fighting in the home, is linked to the need of the participant to present him/herself as the perfect spouse or parent, in keeping with widely accepted notions of the ideal family. That is to say that internalized scripts of worthy motherhood or relationships may generate feelings of inadequacy regarding the Family Self so that, rather than voicing disapproval of gender inequality or revealing domestic conflicts, perhaps people subconsciously conceal these aspects of family life.

Discussion The above findings suggest that family continues to be an important site for free time activities. Despite the common belief that parents are too rushed to devote time to each other or to their children, or the widespread conception that, today, family members are so engrossed in digital devices that they barely engage in face-to-face interaction, the findings of this study suggest that family time may still be significant both in terms of time spent together and in terms of value bestowed to that time. Family time was spent simply “being together” in the home, sharing everyday activities, such as watching television and eating, as well as going out to malls, restaurants movies or trips. Special occasions involved certain rituals in the home, or outings often linked to consumption. Time with family was highly valorized whether spent with one’s spouse or children, in the private or public domain. Participants considered it to be “important” and worth investing in, particularly when experienced as quality time. This may be partially explained by the fact that the study was conducted in Israel with Jewish participants. The centrality of family values

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in Israeli society and Jewish culture has been indicated in past literature (see Chapter 2). The high regard of participants to traditional family time interwoven with collective Jewish practices was expressed when talking about Shabbat meals with the family, which were described as the “highlight” of the week and something to look forward to. Interestingly, participants did not relate to any other free time activity in this manner. While, as we saw in Chapter 5, sport, reading or other pastimes were described as enjoyable, family time was experienced as quality time. Traditional notions of family may also promote gender roles and the absence of a feminist perspective. Ideologies of self-sacrifice that we saw among female participants suggest a traditional approach to motherhood. Moreover, the increase in women’s participation in the workforce and consequently, feelings of guilt among mothers who have been inundated with ideals of intensive mothering, may have led to the idea of quality time as a compensatory mechanism (Hays 1996; Hochschild 1997). Yet adherence to a child-centered approach to mothering was presented by women as a matter of free choice. As Swidler (2001: 150) points out, a “widespread moral vision holds that people should know what they really want, and that when a person is clear about his or her own priorities, nothing is really a sacrifice.” In this way, by blending individualistic values of freedom and agency and therapeutic models of parenting and relationships, together with collective notions of family, female participants presented themselves as free agents in control, rather than insinuating gender inequality or expressing dissatisfaction. The idyllic picture painted by participants, is diametrically opposed to feelings of stress associated with family that were expressed in Chapter 4, as well as in past research that has shown a link between time pressure and having children (Arendell 2000; Robinson and Godbey 1997). At the same time, studies have found that parents are now spending more time with children than in the past (Aguiar and Hurst 2006; Guryan et al. 2008; Jacobs and Gerson 2001; Sayer et al. 2004). Yet it is important to note that having more time with children may not necessarily be experienced positively, nor does it mean that parents have more free time with their children. Indeed, in a study on daily time use, housework and taking care of children were rated among the least enjoyable practices (Kahneman et al. 2004) whereas recreational time with family was reported as one of the more enjoyable activities (Krueger et al. 2007; Robinson and Godbey 1997). How then can we understand this disparity? Can it be explained by the perceived freedom associated with

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free time? In what way do cultural understandings of time use and family, contribute to this apparent contradiction related to the experience of family time? As we saw in participants’ definitions of free time (Chapter 4), a crucial factor indicated was a sense of freedom from commitments to others, with time to oneself being highly valued. From this perspective, the above findings are surprising for we see here, that although this time is other-oriented rather than self-oriented, it is still experienced positively as well as being valorized. On the other hand, these findings are in line with the conception of free time as free from obligations, since time with family is described as enjoyable and worthy only when it is free time and not committed time. Perhaps it is conceived, not only as freedom from domestic duties, but also as “refuge” from the “impersonal, functional relationships” (Kalberg 1992: 349) in other areas of life that demand emotional control (Elias and Dunning 1986). The familiarity and intimacy of family may thus enable the individual to feel free from impression management, thereby generating a sense of authenticity. Family time may also be felt as a release from the self-project and the constant self-work required by it. Moreover, free time with family is a time when family rules are relaxed, allowing interaction outside regular roles, when shared activities foster greater mutual understanding and a feeling of togetherness (Orthner and Mancini 1980). The above findings also support previous research indicating that couples now spend more free time together than in the past (Voorpostel et al. 2010). The participants’ positive descriptions of free time with their spouses suggest a feeling of freedom from the constraints posed by the presence of children. Yet, family time, both with spouses and children, is also experienced as freedom to invest in relationships. This means investing time, effort and money. Romance is associated with the consumption of leisure, an integral part of middle class style (Illouz 1997a: 37). Trips together, or other joint activities that involve interaction, include planning, communicating, sharing and reminiscing, thereby creating a sense of togetherness (Orthner and Mancini 1980). Indeed, togetherness emerged as a central motive and result of various family practices. Even everyday time, such as mealtimes, was indicated as defining and maintaining the family as a social unit as well as being a site for communication (Ochs and Shohet 2006: 37). Time spent with family is perhaps motivated by basic needs, defined by Maslow (1943: 380) as the “love and affection and belongingness needs,” which, he suggests, involve “both giving and receiving love”

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(p. 381). Maslow points out that a basic precondition for the satisfaction of basic needs is freedom, which includes being free to “do what one wishes” as well as being free to “express oneself” (p. 383) (see Chapter 2). The home environment and the intimacy of family appear to allow both. Indeed, freedom as choice and agency, as we have seen, was found to be central to the classification of family time as free time and hence being experienced positively. Even when family was conceived as constraining personal time, it was not voiced as resentment, but rather as a matter of choice. Free time was perceived as an opportunity to invest in couple relationships, suggesting the influence of therapeutic discourse on the experience of marriage (Benjamin 1998). Similarly, intensive, child-centered parenting, particularly mothering, reflected therapeutic prescriptions for worthy parenthood, presented as a life philosophy freely chosen by the individual with self-sacrifice being central. As we saw, one mother said simply, “the more active you are, an active mother so… it takes more time.” This child-centered approach is viewed as axiomatic, as is the importance of family and quality time, intricately linked to conceptions of ideal families and worthy parenting. Since the 1970’s the concept of quality time has become the shibboleth of therapeutic discourse and popular psychology related to parenting and couple relationships. An integral component of quality time is verbal communication, considered to be crucial to “bonding” and thus contributing to a feeling of “togetherness.” This emphasis on language has been linked to middle class families, both as a means to express the “inner” self (Illouz 1997b) as well as developing verbal skills in children (Lareau 2002). It is here, that the cultural understandings of family and relationships become apparent. Bourdieu (1996: 20) relates to the internalization of discourses saying, Every time we use a classificatory concept like ‘family’, we are making both a description and a prescription, which is not perceived as such because it is universally accepted and goes without saying.

In this way, family practices are constructed in the context of what is culturally accepted as worthy (Allan 2008). This may have several implications. Firstly, while the individual may feel that parenting approaches and family time are a matter of free choice, cultural conceptions of the ideal family play a major role in shaping, not only actions but also the

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way we think about relationships. Secondly, as Hays (1996: 70) suggests, ideologies such as “intensive mothering” demand spending “copious amounts of time, energy and material resources” on children, which may exacerbate feelings of time pressure among women. In addition, cultural expectations, particularly among middle class women, may make them conscious of being judged (Offer and Schneider 2011) and, if a mother feels she is not conducting herself in keeping with scripts of worthy motherhood, this may lead to a sense of inadequacy. In other words, individuals become, as Illouz (1991: 246) puts it, “self-monitoring subjects who become their own objects of observation and control” as they access themselves according to cultural ideals. Perhaps this explains the fact that participants presented an image of family harmony and did not relate to conflict resulting from gender inequality concerning domestic roles, nor did they mention children fighting between themselves or discord in relations with parents. While it is true that these issues are not the focus of the current study, it is nevertheless interesting that they did not emerge, considering the in-depth nature of the interviews. Perhaps the internalization of discourses of worthy parenting and relationships may account for the portrayal of family time as quality time and ­conflict-free. The family self is perceived as an integral part of the self-project, and must therefore be presented in keeping with cultural models. Considering the upper middle class status of the participants of the study, the emphasis on correct parenting, couple relationships and worthy time use may be all the more salient. Research has shown that higher income and higher levels of education are positively correlated with spending more time with children (Bianchi et al. 2006; Guryan et al. 2008; Jacobs and Gerson 2004) including extracurricular activities, vacations and other forms of “concerted cultivation” (Lareau 2002). Consequently, while the family self is other-directed, it may also be an extension of the self-project as one strives to meet cultural expectations of the ideal mother, father or spouse. Moreover, the discourse of productivity (see Chapter 6), intertwined with therapeutic principles may promote the utilization of time. Hochschild (2006: 276) suggests that quality time “is just another way of transferring the cult of efficiency from office to home.” In this way, quality time with family is conceived as an efficient use of time to bond and work on family relationships. In addition, consumer culture encourages consumption as a worthy way to use that time as a means of ensuring quality time with the family.

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The family self thus emerged as paradoxical. On the one hand, satisfaction and self-worth are rooted in simple, everyday practices and interactions with family. As we shall see in the chapter on the meaningful self, the valorization of family time may be linked to the high value attached to family as a source of meaning. As Bourdieu (1996: 20) aptly describes family, it exists as a “sanctum,” a “sacred, secret universe with its doors closed to protect its intimacy…” The family is experienced as a sphere of emotional comfort and familiarity, where the individual can relax impression management and be her/himself. On the other hand, discursive knowledge and cultural scripts, promote a self-gaze, that may lead to feelings of pressure and inadequacy due to the many demands of family and relationship ideologies. In this way family time is both an escape from, as well as an integral part of the self-project.

The Sociable Self This section, the second part of The Social Self, examines social interaction outside the family as well as delving into the meanings attached to social practices. We all engage in some form of social interaction, whether at work or at play, on a daily basis, on weekends or only on occasion. The focus here is on social interaction during free time, as I seek to deepen our understanding of how social time is experienced and evaluated. In Chapter 5, we saw what kind of free time activities the participants of the study reported sharing with others, how long was spent on those activities, and with whom they were shared. Yet, the quantitative data did not shed light on the meaning of such practices for the participants. How do they feel about what they do? What motivates participation in social activities? Are they associated with obligation or enjoyment? In what way are social practices linked to the self and freedom? The findings from the questionnaires indicated a social self that spends a significant part of free time with friends. Socializing was found to be a particularly popular activity, with 81.5% of the participants who reported having hosted friends in their homes in the previous month, while 73.7% had been hosted in their friends’ homes. The average time spent on these forms of socializing was approximately 2 and three-quarter hours each time. In addition, participants reported spending an average of 1 hour and 11 minutes over 24 hours on face-to-face communication. Besides interacting in the private domain, outings, such as going to restaurants,

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trips, movies or concerts, involved social engagement. Spending time with friends was indicated as a significant part of free time though it was found to be more salient among female participants (46%) as opposed to men (27%). Sociability: Pleasure and Value What makes socializing such a popular practice? Why do people spend so much free time in the company of others? And how do people feel about their social time? Considering feelings of time pressure so commonly described in contemporary life and among the participants of the study as well (Chapter 4), these questions seem to be all the more pertinent. Thus it is crucial to look at how participants described social time and what it meant to them. It is important to note here that, in the oral interview, participants were not asked specifically about social engagement but it emerged as a salient feature of their free time. Social interaction was perceived as a source of pleasure as well as having value. One participant says, “Just for pleasure is interaction with friends.” For Yasmin, the pleasure derived from meeting friends is described as having added revitalizing properties. She says, “It’s fun. It’s sort of refreshing. It gives energy, strength.” Madlyn contrasts time alone and time with others, saying, “I like spending time with people” explaining, “I don’t like being alone. It’s boring… I like the interaction with people.” As opposed to time alone, which is experienced as “boring,” interaction with others is implied to be more exciting. Some attributed their sociable nature to a positive trait in their personalities. Ilana says, “I have loads of girlfriends, really…. I’m very sociable, I talk, and tik tak, create friendships.” For Denny, too, being sociable is perceived as an inherent part of the self, “for me it’s very important interaction with people, I’m a people person.” Interaction is presented here as having value as the word “important” suggests. Similarly, Yigal uses the word when referring to the significance of friends, saying simply, “Friends have an important place.” As we saw in Chapter 5, for many participants, interaction with friends was presented as a favorite pastime and a practice they were not willing to forgo. Denny considers weekly meetings with friends as such. He enthusiastically describes the social gatherings that include a wide social circle of friends who discuss a variety of topics.

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Just sitting with friends at a café, which is regular, we go out every Friday at 12-the parliament. We sit at the center and everyone joins. My friend and I sit down. People ask where we are so we say we’re at the café. Everyone comes, women, men, kids. We sit, you know, we talk about this and that and about politics and trips. And it’s fun. It clears your head.

His description suggests a regular ritual devoted to social interaction. The café, a neutral setting, serves as the site for the ritual, which follows a similar course every week. The topics of conversation are varied and clearly flexible contributing to an atmosphere of informality reinforced by the manner in which people join without prior commitment. The fact that “everyone comes” suggests a sense of community. A feeling of familiarity promoted by the casual atmosphere, the people and the familiar sequence of events, may afford a sense of security (Burch 1969/2009). The pleasure from the interaction thus serves as a form of release, allowing one to “clear one’s head.” In this way, socializing generates a sense of freedom. As well as being described as “fun” and “important,” social interaction was perceived as a source of happiness, a concept that implies an added sense of meaning, as I shall discuss further in the next chapter. Itai says that, for him, happiness is “Meeting friends, meeting family” and for Maddy, it is “Being with people I like, who I enjoy being with.” In other words, social interaction was experienced as significant, not only as a free time activity but also as a source of happiness. Since socializing was thought of as positive, it was thus considered worth investing in. Neta, for example, makes a conscious effort to ensure time with her friends by marking time in her diary. She says, “I’m not willing to, the fun… give up on my friends. For friends, I actually color timeslots for friends.” For her, participation in a social group means having an organized arrangement where there are defined roles. We have this group every 3 weeks, this group that I started but during… since it’s been for so many years we divided the work. One of the friends takes care of all the things to do with trips and I am in charge of all the cultural part…

The quote suggests that a social group may require maintenance and that members must contribute to the whole. The division of roles involves “work,” which ensures a variety of activities shared by the group. The effort involved is considered worthwhile since activities and outings of the group are seen as valuable.

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The importance of a social group is apparent in Yaffa’s words that express a wish to be part of a framework for social outings, activities and socializing. We have a group but it’s not so active, so we’re trying to make a smaller group. Because you want… you always want to know that you have someone to go out with as a group. It’s not that, I can go out alone and we have loads of friends outside, out of Topaz but you still want, what I mean is to be aware. To also go on holidays, travel with friends, be invited and that.

We see that, while she says she is “trying” to form a social group, Yaffa does not want to give an impression that she is in need of friends. She makes a point of presenting herself as having “loads of friends,” perhaps considered worthy. Yet, for Yaffa, having individual friends is clearly not the same as being part of a group. She adds, “so that you don’t have a situation where suddenly the kids are gone and I don’t have anything to do.” It seems that Yaffa regards being part of a social group as a way to fill one’s free time which becomes all the more significant when children leave the home. In this way, it is also considered an investment for the future. In particular, social interaction with same-sex friends was perceived as significant and referred to by some as their preferred way of spending free time. Madlyn expresses this very clearly saying, “My best, best pastime is meeting with girlfriends… Either at someone’s home, or a café… even to go to a movie.” The superlatives she uses, as well as the different venues mentioned, clarify the fact that it is not the activity that matters, but rather the social interaction with her girlfriends that makes it her favorite pastime. Similarly, Ilana says that one free time activity that she wouldn’t give up is talking and meeting with her girlfriends. She explains, “Girlfriends, it’s really something that is very important to me.” Again, the word “important” suggests that it is seen, not simply as pleasure but also as having value. This was evident among male participants as well. When asked about his favorite pastime, Alon describes the weekly meeting with a personal friend, Every Friday we, it’s like a kind of tradition, that we meet at A, at A café, breakfast, me and him, only me and him. We schmooze for two hours, and then each goes on his way.

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The intimacy of the meeting is expressed in the words, “only me and him.” There is a relaxed atmosphere where he can sit for two hours without feeling time pressured. Moreover, the meetings are described as a “kind of tradition,” implying that the regularity of the practice may contribute to a sense of continuity and familiarity. Interaction with same-sex friends was not restricted to weekends nor to dyad relationships. As we see in Denny’s words, it may include a wider circle of friends as well as close friendships. During the week, in the evening I sit with friends a lot, either to watch basketball together, or it’s a friend who comes over almost every evening at 10 at night and we drink coffee and discuss and that, or I go there.

Meeting with friends may revolve around another activity, such as television viewing, yet this does not detract from its social nature. Sharing an activity, as we saw with family, allows interaction and may generate a feeling of togetherness. Alternatively, personal interaction may be the primary goal of the meeting. A feeling of comradeship is felt in the first while meeting with a friend on a one to one basis implies a sense of intimacy and familiarity. While the companionship of same-sex friends emerged among both male and female participants, it was much more prevalent among the latter. Many of the women indicated spending time with girlfriends as a source of pleasure, perhaps enhanced by a sense of solidarity between them as we see in the following. When asked about what gives her pleasure, Yehudit promptly replies, “Pleasure- yes, I enjoy talking to friends, girlfriends. Mainly girlfriends. I get a lot of strength, fun from women.” She contemplates these friendships saying, Today, I have the choice, really to choose the people who I feel good with. And I also noticed that in recent years, I connect with people who have the same outlook as me, who aren’t judgmental…I enjoy their company very much, whether it’s talking on the phone or talking or pouring your heart out.

For Yehudit, the freedom to choose friends contributes to sense of agency and positive feelings. In addition, the shared outlook may ensure acceptance rather than criticism, adding to the pleasure derived from such relationships. It seems that her friends are also perceived as a source of emotional support, enabling her to express her innermost feelings.

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Spending free time with girlfriends was perceived as quality time. Ilana describes the way a free time activity, such as walking, becomes a quality time when combined with social interaction. She says, “Friends, my girlfriends. I have lots and lots of girlfriends. I go walking with my girlfriend. So we both walk and talk, it’s also quality time to spend with her, a good friend.” The repetition of the word “girlfriends” and the emphasis on the great number, conveys the centrality of friends for Ilana. The above quotes seem to suggest that meeting friends is more than a matter of pleasure or having fun. It is described as “quality time” with a “good friend.” For Debra, meeting a girlfriend for lunch is considered time for herself. She says, “Yesterday I went to meet a girlfriend, we sat, had lunch together. It’s my time for myself.” In other words, although this time is not spent alone, the pleasure derived from the interaction may be experienced as freedom to invest in the self, when one is free to pursue pastimes of one’s choice. Talking emerged as an integral part of interaction, often combined with other activities such as walking as we saw. Free time was indicated by many female participants as an arena for social interaction, particularly of a more intimate nature and incorporating verbal communication. While this was often combined with another activity such as walking or going to a café, the main appeal seems to be spending time together, sitting and talking. Leah, mother of 4 young children who works full time says, “I love sitting with girlfriends. Either to go sit with girlfriends or invite girlfriends here and just chat. It’s something I really, really enjoy.” Both men and women emphasized talking as the essential component of all social activities. This was an integral part of friendships and social interaction, which were highly regarded, as contributing, not only to enjoyment but also to a sense of freedom, belonging, well-being and release. I now examine various pastimes in which social interaction took place, though it may not have been the primary goal of the activity. While, as we saw in Chapter 5, people pursue many activities for the sake of pleasure or self-fulfillment, an additional motive that emerged, was the social interaction resulting from participation in group activities, such as sport, dancing, singing or studying. The emphasis participants placed on the social aspect of these pastimes was quite surprising, particularly since the relationships with co-participants of these activities, were not rooted in close friendships such as those we saw above. Sport was one such activity. While participants indicated health, pleasure and external appearance, as motives for their participation in sport,

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it also emerged as a form of social interaction. Yehudit states quite clearly that, for her, the social aspect is the main source of pleasure, “I enjoy the social part of it. That I meet people, a social club, not the sport itself.” Similarly, Ofrah points to the company of others as a motive for going to exercise classes. She explains, I like the togetherness. I see myself less enjoying going by myself or running alone, more the togetherness, less alone. I like being alone, I like it a lot. I can sit at home for hours, days I have no problem with that but as far as activities and that, I feel more alive with others. I really like company.

She differentiates between being alone at home and the need for company when doing certain activities. While she feels comfortable being alone in the private domain, for her, the participation in an activity with others has an energizing quality that makes her “feel more alive.” The repetition of the word “togetherness,” stresses the feeling of solidarity and belonging that results from the group framework. While 70.2% of participants reported having done various kinds of sport in the month before the interview, 44.7% said they had been to exercise classes. Interestingly, all but one were women. Shimon, the manager of the local country club confirms this saying, Most of our activities, turned out to be, because of demand, for women. Ninety-five percent of our activities are for women. In general, men come more to the gym, come more to swim.

He notes that the various group activities such as Zumba, Pilates, Feldenkrais and yoga are generally offered to both men and women, yet the participation is almost exclusively female. This is not to say that the only reason for the high rate of female participation is the sociability factor. Indeed, Shimon says that many of these classes are aimed at body shaping (as we saw in Chapter 6), which, he suggests, may be a major motive for taking part. Nevertheless, the words of female participants regarding the experience, suggest that the social interaction in group activities, enhances enjoyment and may be a central motivating factor for participation. Michal, who was unemployed at the time of the interview, describes the social aspect of exercise class as being significant, saying, “I think that because I’m at home now and I don’t have much company my age, it’s a

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kind of company. ‘Cos it’s women and we talk a bit and tell things.” Her words suggest that the fact that the interaction is with other women, means they may identify with each other, promoting an atmosphere of confidence where they feel comfortable to “tell things.” She goes on to describe the changing rooms, saying, I go into have a shower at the country club. So I’ve discovered it’s a whole festivity. Full of women, naked (laughs). It’s like it has something… don’t know, something terribly… sisterhood.

This feeling of solidarity with other women is experienced by Michal as a celebration of “sisterhood.” The interaction is perceived as a form of bonding with other women. Their nakedness, perhaps suggests a stripping of external layers that may act as obstacles to solidarity between the women, as well as highlighting the intimacy of the experience. A number of men who reported doing sport regularly, played on teams. For them too, the social interaction involved was indicated as an integral part of the experience. Erez, who plays soccer twice a week, says he always goes even when he doesn’t “feel like it,” explaining that he likes competition and contact with people. Besides the interaction while playing, Erez describes a social outing following the game. For him, going out to a restaurant with fellow players, is an enjoyable part of the experience. Zack, too, goes out to eat with a friend after going running together every Friday. In addition, like Erez, he plays on a sports team, saying that the players have become his friends and that, for him, sport is “definitely a social thing.” When Gabe, the mayor of the town, relates to bike-riding as an example of a popular hobby among residents, the social aspect is evident. Now, who do they ride with? The men ride with men, the women with women. And then there can be a situation that, on Saturday morning, that could be defined as the best quality time that you have…you go with the group. So you have quality time with your friends…

Interestingly, though it is not an interactive sport, Gabe’s observations accentuate the centrality of sociability. He suggests that participation is not only directed at the activity itself but also motivated by the social aspect, which transforms it into “quality time” with same-sex friends.

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This social element of sport was apparent in other activities. Vera, who dances in a dance group says, “there’s a group and it totally feels like a community.” The word “community,” like the words “togetherness” and “sisterhood,” used in the previous quotes, suggests a feeling of solidarity and belonging. For Efrat, “meeting with people” is indicated as part of her enjoyment from singing in a choir. Yaffa, who goes to regular enrichment classes, also refers to the social aspect of the activity saying, “Clearly it’s also got to do with the atmosphere. That is there’s a pleasant atmosphere. It’s women who… clever women. We sit and talk.” Yaffa suggests that being in the company of other women, may create a positive “atmosphere,” conducive to social interaction and perhaps, because they are seen as intelligent, Yaffa feels they can contribute to one another. Interestingly, many of the above frameworks consisted of members of the same sex. Perhaps, this adds to the feeling of solidarity described by participants. Sites for Socializing Meeting with friends, as we have seen, was indicated as being an important aspect of free time. Going out together was found to be a regular pastime, which included going to cafes, as well as restaurants, movies or friends’ homes. Unlike many other free time activities where social interaction was a by-product, the social aspect of going out was indicated by many participants as the primary motive of the activity. We have seen that eating out was an activity associated with socializing. Eighty four percent of participants reported having gone to a restaurant or café in their free time in the month preceding the interview. The average time spent was almost 2 hours. While this did not necessarily mean going out exclusively with friends, eating out was certainly found to be a popular activity for interacting with friends. Debra points out the centrality of food in these outings yet she suggests that socializing is the primary aim, saying, I think we meet once every 2 weeks with friends. Always around food. That, or we go to a movie or sit in a café…There’s always food but food isn’t the aim. Food is the means.

Commensality, as we saw in the previous chapter, is seen as creating a suitable atmosphere for social interaction and associated with a feeling of togetherness.

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Manny relates to other venues as well as cafes and restaurants, though eating seems to dominate. You can call me and say, Manny, do you want to go out, doesn’t matter, a pub, home or restaurant. I say yes without even… even if I’m tired. Mainly weekends. We meet with friends. We try to go out from time to time to a play or movie or some show, to a restaurant. Mostly it’s restaurants or cafes or that kind of thing.

He conveys his view of the importance of friends by showing his flexibility regarding the nature of the outing as well as mentioning that he agrees to go even when tired. Apparently, for him, the opportunity for an outing with friends comes above other personal considerations. The social aspect was also a significant component of communal events organized for town residents. Gali, who manages the local cultural center, enumerates the many events that she organizes in the town. These include a wide range of activities including plays, park happenings, music events, cultural evenings with guest speakers, sport, ballroom dancing, art and yoga in the park. These events are a site for social interaction among local residents, many of whom know each other. Participation, thus increases a feeling of belonging and community. Shimon, the country club manager talks of special communal events, such as a day for volunteers or a fun day for soldiers that take place in the grounds of the club. Gabe, the mayor, mentions basketball tournaments and lectures, while Ellie, who is in charge of culture for the religious sector, refers to holiday gatherings, guest speakers, tours, annual cultural festivals and movies in the park. While the above activities and events are varied and focus on different interests, what they have in common is their social character. They are not free time activities in which the individual partakes alone. All involve social interaction whether one goes together with one’s family or friends, or meets others there. Indeed, many of the events are designed to foster social interaction and strengthen communal integration. An additional arena for socializing was going on trips. Spending time in nature, having picnics, or going on trips was reported by 68% who spent many hours on the activity. As one participant says, she likes “the interaction during and the talking.” The social aspect of trips or picnics is presented as a major contributing factor toward enjoyment.

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This, as well as an opportunity for change from routine, is evident in the following which suggests pleasure and a sense of release, “We always go on trips with friends… company, nature, getting out of the house, a change from routine. Friends, it’s nice. A picnic slash trips.” Words such as “always,” “usually” or “tradition,” were used by participants to point to the regular nature of the practices. These outings included a variety of activities and venues. One participant describes trips with friends and their children. We usually go with other friends and then we organize all sorts of activities, whether it’s dune buggies, water tubes and all sorts of things like that. In the evening we do a barbeque, what you do with friends.

The activities that are shared with friends and their families, are presented as exciting and very different from mundane, everyday practices. In this way, such trips may be experienced as an opportunity to enjoy the company of friends in a setting that is fun and exhilarating, perhaps also conceived as a bonding mechanism. Having a barbeque is presented as an accepted ritual among friends, one that may be thought to enhance the feeling of togetherness. Neta talks of a regular group of friends with whom she goes on trips without children. We have a tradition. My birthday is always a bike trip. My husband’s birthday is a trip to Jerusalem. We have a friend who was born in the summer so it’s a night trip…

The word “tradition” conveys a sense of continuity and the security generated by the familiarity of the practice. By establishing set practices, social interaction is ensured in a variety of settings. While the above activities may have been pursued as enjoyable in themselves, it seems that socializing with friends was a major motivating factor as well as contributing to the pleasure of the experience. As we have seen, the public domain was a common site for social engagement, yet the most popular form of socializing took place in the private domain. Inviting friends and going out to friends’ homes were popular weekend activities on which participants spent a considerable amount of time. Here, too, the pastime involves a combination of talking and eating.

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One participant describes these meetings as an enjoyable, long-standing practice. He says, We have a circle of friends that is since childhood and we have a kind of custom that once a week or once in two weeks a couple invites the other couples for dinner on Friday night… without kids and that way we take our time and talk and it’s fun.

Much like the word “tradition” as we saw earlier, the word “custom,” emphasizes the regularity of the practice that may have taken on a status of sacredness based on deeply rooted friendships that have a shared history. Moreover, the rituality of the practice affords it with positive connotations associated with values. The last part of the quote suggests that the fact that they meet without children, enhances the pleasure derived from the social interaction of conversing since the atmosphere is relaxed. It seems that being free from the parental role generates a sense of release from time pressure. The regularity and familiarity of such get-togethers are highlighted by Ofrah who, as above, describes them as an established practice saying, “We have a concept – coming for Shakshuka. It’s Saturday morning.” She, too points out that her friendships go a long way back, “I have my childhood friends who I’m in touch with their families and all and it’s become like one big family.” Perhaps the familiarity in enduring relationships fosters a certain intimacy that heightens the individual’s sense of belonging and hence one’s pleasure. Here, too the practice has become a ritual that elevates its value. Many participants indicated the actual process of entertaining guests as an integral part of their enjoyment. This included both the cooking and baking but particularly the hosting itself, as Eran expresses clearly, “Personally, I really love having guests, I cook and bake but more than liking the cooking and baking, I like to host and see people enjoying themselves.” For Erez, it seems that the activity may generate a sense of selfworth derived from a feeling of being able to contribute to the pleasure of others. Similarly, Ilana points to both the preparations and the company as a source of pleasure, adding the personality factor. We invite a lot and get invited. Having guests, I really like. Everything, also the preparing, also the hosting. When we have company, I really like

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company. Altogether, its fun, it’s nice when the house…when there’s …I’m a person who likes company very much….

While a Maussian view of social relations focuses on reciprocity, as do many media representations that present entertaining in the home as a matter of obligation, this aspect was not the focus of the participants of the study. On the contrary, the above quotes suggest that having guests is an activity from which the individual derives pleasure without a sense of duty. Abe clarifies the centrality of choice, saying, “There is no such thing that I invite, besides my mother-in law, if I don’t want to. Every week …at least one meal a week with friends.” Only three participants expressed mixed feelings. On the one hand, they saw hosting guests as a burden, yet they still reported enjoying it. Maurice relates to the deliberation involved before, “It has limitations. What should we prepare, what…?” Despite the negative side, he adds that he likes having guests “very much.” For Alon, entertaining during the weekend is seen as a great effort entailing many preparations, which he perceives as “problematic.” We put so much into it. That’s the problem…when we have guests, it’s never for coffee and cake. Like… we want to do it but we don’t know how… It’s problematic.

He goes on to describe the many preparations that begin on Tuesday, including planning and shopping, yet he concludes saying, “But it’s with love and it’s our pleasure. It’s always, like with all the heart.” The preparations involved are clearly seen as a burden though, interestingly, he describes it as “pleasure.” The negative side of entertaining for Maurice and Alon, is not rooted in a need for reciprocity or duty, but rather in the effort it involves. The ambivalence related to having guests was apparent in the words of Yehudit, who says, “I love being with people. To go to friends, to invite, these weekly get- togethers.” Clearly the social interaction of the activity is a pivotal constituent contributing to pleasure. However, later in the interview she describes the work involved, saying, It takes up a lot of time… I have guests a lot, both family and friends so it’s also cooking and tidying up, tidying up afterwards. It takes a long time. I do it a lot.

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It is interesting to note that she was the only participant whose words suggested a sense of obligation. She says that she is a “family woman” who invites “people from the business world. Promotion… You know, networking.” Yet this is modified as she emphasizes her choice in the matter, “But I only invite people who I enjoy being with.” Presenting herself as having freedom to choose emerges as an important part of her selfpresentation. Pleasure from the interaction is seen as crucial, even though the initial motivation may be a sense of duty. Besides face-to-face verbal communication, participants reported spending an average of 51 minutes per day on telephone conversations in their free time, which were conducted on a daily basis. Although this may include communication with family members, the qualitative findings indicate that this medium was used, to a large extent, for talking to friends. This was a surprising finding since it may be expected that the increase in the use of smartphones applications and computer technology would reduce telephone conversations to minimal communication. While telephone conversations are often associated with multitasking, some participants afforded undivided attention to this mode of communication. As we see in the following quote, though Michal often multitasks when talking on the telephone, she considers it a worthy free time activity in itself, resembling the “quality time” of face-to-face conversations that we saw earlier. Let’s say on the phone, most of the time when I’m talking with my friends I do something else as well, but sometimes I say, no, I sit on the couch and now I’m talking to… that’s free time for me, that I’m taking, I don’t know, because they’re conversations that are a bit more… deeper.

Michal suggests that the when the individual devotes her/his full attention to the activity, without the distractions of multitasking, this may be what qualifies it as free time. It is perceived as free since it is not invaded by other tasks and the individual is active in “taking” that time to sit down on the couch and engage in conversation. In this way, freedom allows for more meaningful interaction. The setting itself seems to be of no consequence, but rather the frame of mind and the attention given to the activity that is important. Similarly, Dana illustrates the link between the devotion to the act and the profundity of the conversation. The level of pleasure from the activity also depends, it seems, on the complete dedication allotted to it.

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Mostly I sit outside and talk to a girlfriend who calls or I call her. Conversations that are almost never just about this and that. It always becomes a conversation… I have few girlfriends, but with all of them it’s deep conversations…It’s really enjoyable. It’s not while I’m doing something else. No, I stop, I stop, not while doing something. And if I’m in the middle, I hang up and call back later.

Dana makes a point of stressing her active part in ensuring the quality of the interaction. The repetition of the words “stop” and “not while doing something” convey the agency in her actions. Like Michal, who chose to say “no” to doing other things during the conversation, Dana insists on stopping additional activities thereby ensuring the quality of this free time practice. For Sarit, even though talking on the phone is done while driving, it is still perceived as a positive means of interaction with girlfriends. She says, “While driving, though I shouldn’t, I like talking on the phone. It’s the quietest time… with my girlfriends.” Here too, the time is perceived as an opportunity to devote time to communicate with friends since it is experienced as quiet time without external interferences. While almost double the number of female participants as opposed to men reported phone conversations in their free time, Facebook was mentioned by both men and women as a form of communication. Abe, for example, who uses chat on Facebook, says, “It’s instead of the phone… every period and it’s format.” He refers to the humor of friends on Facebook as something he enjoys, yet he makes a point of saying that it does not replace interaction in person, “It doesn’t change the meetings, it’s friends who aren’t in Topaz.” In addition, he uses Facebook as a means of virtual socializing with friends while watching sport on television. In this way, despite not being physically together, they are able to share a common interest. It’s a bit hard to call it alone, because it’s usually with communication with friends watching in other places. Those friends who would come and watch or, who I would go to watch with them, now most games we watch together but each at his own house.

For Abe, Internet technology simply facilitates the connection with friends when they are not in close proximity, so that they feel as though they are watching “together.” Facebook was indicated by other participants as a means of keeping in touch with friends from a distance.

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A number said they use it to stay in contact with overseas friends in particular. Social interaction on the Internet was not only through Facebook. Pam, whose favorite hobby is beading, is an active participant in a forum that has become a significant site for social interaction for her and the other members. From all over the country, it’s a forum, yes of beaders…I have met them, not all of them but a lot. I talk to them on the phone, meet them. It’s fun…It’s a group of women who have something in common, it’s the beads so we talk about other things too. They recommend a book, a recipe or movie or congratulate if someone has a baby or when a son goes to the army or… care about each other. It’s very nice, very nice.

The forum is more than an instrument for interaction related to the hobby. It generates a sense of community where members of the group “care about each other,” share similar interests, advise with one another and socialize in other settings. In this way, virtual communication serves as a framework which functions as a social group.

Discussion Social activities and relationships were found to be an integral part of free time. These were experienced by participants as a source of pleasure, a form of release, and as fostering a sense of belonging. Friendships, whether in close, dyad relationships or wider circles of friends, were highly valued. Interaction included face-to-face conversations, communicating by telephone and the Internet, as well as socializing in the home or in the public domain. The above findings are noteworthy in two ways. Firstly, the extent of social activities and the high proportion of time spent on them was not expected in light of literature, popular media and surveys suggesting increased loneliness, shrinking networks, and a decline in face-toface interaction and the quality of personal relationships (GSS 2015; Hampton et al. 2009; McPherson et al. 2006; Misra et al. 2016; Patulny and Seaman 2017). However, the current findings support other research which has challenged these claims, saying that family and friends are still connected, friendships have increased and, that despite the increase in the number of people living alone, they may be more socially engaged

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(Fischer 2009, 2011; Klinenberg 2012; Spencer and Pahl 2006; Wang and Wellman 2010). Moreover, while the rise in the use of the Internet and mobile technology has been indicated as detrimental to social interaction (Misra et al. 2016), this study supports the claim by others that it enhances social life rather than isolating individuals (Amichai-Hamburger and Hayat 2011; Hampton et al. 2011; Wellman 2004). With regards to the time spent on social interaction, the study’s findings are consistent with those of time use surveys which indicate socializing as being the second most common leisure activity after watching television, as well as being reported as the most enjoyable (ATUS 2018; Zuzanek 2014). The second unexpected finding here was the high value attached to social activities. This was particularly surprising considering the individualistic emphasis on self-realization and self-management that we saw in the previous chapters. Activities involving social interaction were considered both enjoyable as well as meaningful, with many participants even classifying them as their favorite form of free time. The oral interviews with the participants of the study may help us understand what motivates individuals to be socially engaged and why social activities are highly valued. Their words shed light on the meaning of relationships for them and how they are related to the self, as well as why a significant amount of time is spent on social activities. While social interaction is often associated with impression management and face-work (Goffman 1955, 1959), these aspects of social time did not emerge as salient in the above findings. We have seen in previous chapters, that self-presentation and social comparison are central to many free time activities and one would expect social arenas to be the major site for, what Goffman calls, the dramaturgical self or the staged self. However, social engagement was experienced by participants as quality time, which is less pressured, less managed and less committed. Rather than contributing to a self-gaze that brings about self-work associated with feelings of inadequacy, social activities were described, not only as a source of pleasure, but also as contributing to positive feelings without the burden of obligation that characterizes other arenas. Elias and Dunning (1986) explain this unique quality of sociable engagements. …people join each other… without ‘performing’ for others or for themselves…, quite simply to enjoy each other’s company, to enjoy, that is, a higher level of emotional warmth, of social integration and stimulation through the presence of others- a playful stimulation without serious

270  M. SHIR-WISE commitments and the risks inherent in them- than is possible in any other sphere of life. (p. 122)

Indeed, the above findings illustrate the enjoyment, warmth and playlike carefreeness derived from being in the company of others during free time, when one is not bound by obligation. These characteristics are intricately linked to a sense of freedom. While freedom is a concept that may generally be related to self-directed practices and ideas of individualism; activities involving social participation, though other-directed and more collective by nature, may also be associated with freedom. By freedom I mean the dual concept referred to in Chapter 4, namely freedom from and freedom to. Social engagement may generate a feeling of freedom from everyday routine, serious goals and emotional pressure. It was experienced as a release from quotidian practices (Burch 1969/2009) when one is able to eat differently, and have a change of scenery, modes of interaction, and the people with whom one interacts. Work and family interactions, in contrast, are likely to be routinized, and more importantly, generally perceived as obligatory. In sociability, Simmel (1949) suggests, the individual is free from more serious purposes and “the concrete motives bound up with life goals fall away” (p. 255). In this way, social interaction in free time allows emotional freedom. Whereas in other areas of life, interaction is more impersonal and emotional barriers are high, in free time sociability, barriers can be lowered (Elias and Dunning 1986). This may be particularly true regarding friendships of a more intimate nature. Perhaps the notion of friendship as a “tie of equality” (Allan 1998: 693) enhances interaction, described by Simmel (1949: 257) as being the “purest” when among equals. The high regard for free time with same-sex friends that we saw, may be based on this belief of equivalence. Feeling free from pressure associated with unequal relationships in other areas of life may thus allow freedom to “express ourselves as the people we are” and reveal the inner self (Allan 1998: 698; Silver 1990). In this way, social engagement is experienced as freedom to act as one wishes. As opposed to obligated relationships, friendships are characterized by voluntariness, personal agency and choice (Friedman 1992: 113; Silver 1990) and regarded as individualized (Allan 2008). Consequently, informal interaction can be “free, spontaneous, and self-expressive” (Crandall et al. 1980: 296). The freedom from formal interactions means escaping the expectations associated with them and the context of free

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time allows for the relaxing of inner restraints required in other framings. Yet, if the individual is simply motivated by a need to be free from the obligatory demands of certain relationships, one might expect the pursuit of self-directed pastimes and the avoidance of social interaction. As we have seen, rather than eschewing social engagement, it is desired and sought. What then, draws the individual toward social activities? Collins (2004) points to “currents of feeling” that heighten the experience of what he calls “interaction rituals.” The “rhythmic entrainment” of turn-taking in conversation and laughter, as well as the bodily gestures which serve as feedback, contribute to the experience, he says. Being in the company of others is thus characterized by what Durkheim (1912/2008) termed a “collective effervescence.” Indeed, participants described social interaction as energizing, making one “feel more alive.” Thus, rather than performing activities alone, people who have common interests come together sharing the meaning of these “focal practices” (Borgmann 1993). This includes free time activities and the shared experience of consumption, such as restaurants or holidays. Besides being conceived as freedom to enjoy the “fun” and the emotional energy associated with social interaction, participants experienced social time as freedom to nurture relationships. Words such as “togetherness,” “sisterhood” and “community,” that came up in the interviews, suggest satisfaction from the feeling of the union brought about by the association with others (Simmel 1949). The bodily presence of others contributes to “the experience of belonging” (Collins 2004: 47) and the sharing of an activity fosters feelings of solidarity, which enables sharers “to express relatedness, psychic closeness and mutual respect” (Goffman 1961: 40). It seems that being with other people may be associated with a freedom to fulfill basic needs of love and belongingness as well as the need for self-esteem, which includes recognition and appreciation from others (Baumeister and Leary 1995; Maslow 1943/1968). Socializing may satisfy the need for self-esteem through the feedback one receives from the surroundings. A need for “social worth” as Ryan and Deci (2000) call it, is a desire to be valued by others. Appreciation and gratitude enhance feelings of self-efficacy and self-worth (Grant and Gino 2010), which in turn encourages people to invest more time and effort into activities that contribute to feelings of competence (Bandura 1977; Ryan and Deci 2000). This would explain the positive perceptions of hosting guests, despite the energy invested in these activities. In this way, social interaction is an arena of freedom to cultivate the self. Identities

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are formed through caring, mutual interests and communal ties (Friedman 1992). In addition, the self can be understood in the context of others whose narratives become part of their own (Berkman et al. 2000). Indeed, socializing and close relationships have been found to be strongly correlated with being happy (Baumeister and Leary 1995; Diener and Seligman 2002; Kahneman et al. 2004; Ryan and Deci 2001). The fulfillment of fundamental needs through social interaction may create a sense of happiness, which may explain the high evaluation of social engagement. It seems then, that it is linked, not only to pleasure of a more transitory nature but also to a more profound, meaningful happiness, which is the focus of the next chapter on the Meaningful Self.

Note 1. The Jewish Sabbath begins at sunset on Friday and ends at nightfall on Saturday night. The practice of sharing a festive meal on Friday night is widespread among many Jews, including those who are not religious.

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276  M. SHIR-WISE Sayer, Liana C., Suzanne M. Bianchi, and John P. Robinson. 2004. Are Parents Investing Less in Children? Trends in Mothers’ and Fathers’ Time with Children. American Journal of Sociology 110 (1): 1–43. Silver, Allan. 1990. Friendship in Commercial Society: Eighteenth-Century Social Theory and Modern Sociology. American Journal of Sociology 95 (6): 1474–1504. Simmel, Georg. 1949. The Sociology of Sociability. Translated by Everett C. Hughes. American Journal of Sociology 55 (3): 254–261. Spencer, Liz, and Raymond Edward Pahl. 2006. Rethinking Friendship: Hidden Solidarities Today. Princeton, NJ: Princeton University Press. Swidler, Anne. 2001. Talk of Love: How Culture Matters. Chicago: University of Chicago Press. Voorpostel, Marieke, Tanja van der Lippe, and Jonathan Gershuny. 2010. Spending Time Together—Changes over Four Decades in Leisure Time Spent with a Spouse. Journal of Leisure Research 42 (2): 243–265. Wang, Hua, and Barry Wellman. 2010. Social Connectivity in America: Changes in Adult Friendship Network Size from 2002 to 2007. American Behavioral Scientist 53 (8): 1148–1169. Wellman, Barry. 2004. Connecting Communities, On and Offline. Contexts 3 (4): 22–28.

CHAPTER 9

The Meaningful Self

In the previous chapters, we have seen that perceptions of free time are somewhat paradoxical. On the one hand, free time is associated with pleasure, fun or relaxation. On the other hand, work ethics, consumer culture and the therapeutic ethos encourage the utilization of time for self-management. However, the previous chapter described family free time as an integral part of the self, as participants strived to maintain ideal notions of parenthood, couple relationships or family time, yet that time was also other-oriented and highly valued. The findings presented in this chapter suggest that, as well as the individualistic notion of the self that pursues pleasure or self-management, many free time practices, particularly those shared with others, were experienced, not only in terms of fun and gratification, but also associated with a sense of meaning. This is not to say that the collective, social factor is the sole contributor to meaning. As we shall see in this chapter, while family or helping others was indicated as crucial to meaningfulness, so too were certain selforiented activities. The current chapter explores the Meaningful Self, with the hope to gain insight into what motivates action and how it is experienced and evaluated. As we have seen, some of our free time is simply passed in the easiest possible way while some of it requires effort or planning. This may depend on how readily available certain activities are at a particular moment, on energy levels, or on motivation. Individuals may be motivated by various needs such as a wish to achieve a worthy body, by a © The Author(s) 2019 M. Shir-Wise, Time, Freedom and the Self, Leisure Studies in a Global Era, https://doi.org/10.1007/978-3-030-13841-7_9

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need to relax after a hard day’s work or perhaps by a desire for happiness in a deeper sense. The last is the focus of the current chapter. As discussed in Chapter 2, happiness is a central goal of the self, perceived as both a right and a responsibility. Given the focus of the study on the self, freedom and meaning, it was thus crucial to ask participants about happiness. By asking such questions I hoped to uncover motivations for free time practices, but even more importantly, to shed light on conceptions of desirable selves associated with happiness, as well as the cultural repertoires that shape these ideal notions toward which individuals strive. However, in contrast to preceding chapters that focused primarily on free time practices, here I am more interested in how participants conceive and experience happiness and the way this is linked to meaningfulness. Thus, while I relate to free time practices associated with these themes, this chapter is not limited to free time. Additionally, I present here participants’ thoughts about happiness and what is important to them on a more abstract level, in the hope that these perceptions will serve as a lens through which free time can be better understood. As we shall see, findings indicate a distinction between participants’ conceptions of pleasure and happiness. This differentiation is significant since it sheds light on what is thought to be beyond hedonic pleasure and experienced as meaningful. I therefore begin by distinguishing between pleasure and happiness in the context of free time, both of which may motivate the individual’s free time practices, though, as I shall claim, feelings of happiness may infuse free time with a sense of meaning. I then examine the various arenas of happiness indicated by participants, which incorporate collective and individualistic sources of meaning. Finally, I present responses to questions pertaining to contentment from one’s lifestyle as well as conceptions of the ideal self, in order to understand the link between ideas of worthy selfhood, notions of happiness and meaningfulness.

Pleasure Versus Happiness While the words pleasure and happiness are both associated with enjoyment, the use of the two terms by participants evoked different meanings. It is important to note here that, like the English words, the Hebrew terms hanaah and osher elicited distinctive interpretations. The first connoted a hedonistic form of gratification, while the second was

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associated with a more lasting notion of happiness linked to meaning. This is in keeping with philosophical distinctions between the two, as noted by Davis (1981), “Pleasure suggests worldly, trivial, animal and short-range pursuits, while ‘happiness’ suggests spiritual, profound, noble and long-range pursuits” (p. 308). As we saw in the second part of Chapter 5, “Subjective Mapping: The Hierarchization of Free Time,” pleasure in free time was linked to fun or relaxation resulting from everyday activities in the home as well as outings to restaurants, movies and nature, or vacations. Autotelic activities, such as cooking, reading, sport or music, were also associated with pleasure. On the one hand, the concept of pleasure included a sense of unwinding from the pressure of duties. This feeling of escape, or ­freedom from constraints, was experienced while watching television, reading a book, going to nature or simply drinking coffee. On the other hand, pleasure was also associated with freedom to pursue activities one enjoys as well as hedonistic forms of gratification such as drinking “good wine,” doing sport or having a massage. Whether experienced as relaxation, enjoyment or hedonic indulgence, pleasure emerged as transient as opposed to happiness, which, as we shall see, was experienced as a deeply rooted contentment that was, not only more durable, but also intricately linked to meaning in life. In contrast to pleasure, with connotations of superficiality, notions of happiness were associated with deeper significance. Consequently, the pursuit of happiness was envisaged as a worthy goal often linked to conceptions of quality time. In order to shed light on this distinction, participants were asked about free time activities experienced as pleasure as well as being asked what makes them happy. When addressed with the question of happiness, participants related to life philosophies and values that were both other-oriented as well as self-oriented. Although conceptions of happiness are not linked exclusively to free time practices, by deepening our understanding of happiness which is intertwined with meaningfulness, I hope to illuminate, not only the motivations behind certain practices but also conceptions of worth and the hierarchical ordering of free time.

Family as a Source of Happiness We have already seen that family activities were highly valorized by participants (see Chapter 8, “The Family Self”). Time spent with family was described as “quality time” worthwhile investing in. Indeed, when

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participants were asked what makes them happy, the family, particularly children, emerged as the most dominant contributing factor. Despite the sense of pressure that was experienced as a result of the multiple duties involved in parenting and domestic management (see Chapter 4), family was indicated as a major source of happiness. Maddy, mother of 5, links family with meaning and worthy time use, prioritizing time for others over self-directed practices. If you understand that time is supposed to be something of value, then you are more likely maybe to want to use your free time to also do for others or, things that have… quality time with your children or your family rather than seeing free time as being pampering yourself to make you feel good.

For Maddy, using free time for others increases its value and contributing to others is considered to be superior to devoting time to oneself. The use of the word “pampering” suggests a negative view of self-indulgence, particularly when juxtaposed with the words “value” and “quality” associated with doing things for others. Feeling good through self-indulgence is implied to be a hedonistic form of pleasure, whereas spending time with one’s family is ranked high on the hierarchy of worth since it is considered to be meaningful, hence family time was often classified as quality time. As we saw in the chapter entitled The Family Self, the nature of the activity was found to be less significant than simply being with family, which was indicated as contributing to a sense of happiness. When asked about happiness, Maddy’s husband, Daniel, says, Seeing my wife at the end of the day spending time with … Makes me happy seeing my kids be together, be happy together playing a game together … just being together speaking together, seeing them together as a family.

The repetition of the word “seeing” highlights the feeling of happiness that is generated by simply observing the family whereas the word “together,” also used repeatedly, emphasizes a sense of family as a unit and the importance of togetherness. This feeling of contentment from just “seeing” the family was also evident in Yaron’s words,

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I enjoy Friday nights when all the kids come…It’s the little things that really make you (happy). I see my grandchildren, they smile at me and laugh and hug me, that.. those are the things that make me happy.

Interestingly, it is described as “the little things.” These words appear to suggest that this kind of happiness is easily attainable, as opposed to other goals that are culturally accepted as worthwhile, and fervidly pursued. Additionally, as we saw in Chapter 8, the traditional Friday night Sabbath meals were positively experienced and indicated as an opportunity to devote time to the family. Ofrah, mother of 2, points to a tranquility associated with the modest desire for family-related happiness, “I am happy in my family …I’m not looking for wealth, really, that’s the truth….I’m not interested in a fancy house or.. everything minimal. Not clothes, not makeup. That there’s tranquility, that life flows.” For Ofrah, happiness is less about consumer values of constant consumption and the pursuit of material goals, and more about contentment implied as meaningful. She too, later adds the words “the little things,” as do other ­participants, who seem to be implying that the little things are actually big as far as happiness is concerned. The “tranquility” described by Ofrah emerged among participants for whom happiness was experienced as a calm, inner feeling, often elicited by others’ positive feelings. They suggest that the source of one’s happiness is the happiness of one’s family. Betty explains, “First of all, it makes me happy to see my immediate family happy and healthy. That is the very most, that calms me and makes me feel good.” For Betty, like Ofrah, happiness has a calming effect that leads to tranquility. The words, “feel good,” were used by others to convey the sense of inner contentment and satisfaction resulting from simply “seeing” members of the family who are happy, as Amos says, “I think that the inner moments when I really feel very, very good is when I see my daughter happy.” Significant others are presented as an extension of the self so that personal happiness is experienced through their happiness. This connection between one’s own sense of happiness and that of the family may also have implications on one’s self-image. Maddy illustrates the link between her feelings of competence to be able to fulfill the role of mother and spouse, and her sense of happiness. I would say I am happy when my kids are happy, when my husband’s happy, and again not for altruistic reasons necessarily but just from the

282  M. SHIR-WISE point of view that it sort of makes you feel good that you know your kids are happy, you are doing right, if your kids are unhappy you start thinking well, what am I doing wrong, you know, your husband’s happy then you feel good about yourself as a wife, as a woman you know.

Throughout the interview, motherhood and family emerged as an integral part of Maddy’s identity and, for her, happiness is possible when her self-concept is in keeping with conceptions of family roles. The happiness of her family is perceived as a reflection on her capabilities in mothering and her role as a wife. In this way, her own experience of happiness is interwoven with the happiness of the family members. Both female and male participants related to the ability to give to one’s family as a source of happiness, For Alon, it means realizing a dream of being able to bestow upon his family what he, as a child, did not have. Being able to give them what I dreamt I would give them and that I will be able to continue giving them. The satisfaction that I can give them what I didn’t have, It makes me, how do you say? I go around all the time saying thank God. It’s not me, it’s up there.

Fulfilling the role of provider emerged in the interview as central to Alon’s identity who experiences this aspect of his fatherhood as crucial to his sense of happiness. It is described as a dream come true, a goal that has been attained. The satisfaction from giving, is experienced as a matter of Divine intervention for which he is grateful and perhaps imbues his life with meaning. Like Maddy, Alon’s happiness is embedded in values of family and goodness associated with giving to others, as well as feelings of self-efficacy. Many participants pointed to their children’s achievements when asked what makes them happy. If, as we have said, happiness, as opposed to pleasure, is an indicator of what is thought to be more profound, the success of one’s children was found to be a significant ingredient of meaningfulness. This, too, was experienced as a sense of giving, a central component of the meaningful self. Yet it was also a matter of sharing feelings with one’s child, who may be conceived as an extension of the self. This was evident among male and female participants with children of various ages. Ilana, mother of 3 young children says, “Really, that they have successes, when they feel good, it makes me feel happiness.” Similarly,

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when asked what makes him happy, Oren father of 5 says, “when I see the kids succeed at something, that they’re happy from something.” However, here too, one’s child’s achievements contribute to a sense of self-efficacy, being perceived as a reflection on one’s parenting capability. Children’s successes were considered a rewarding outcome of effective parenting as the following quotes suggest. Betty sees her mothering as a long-term investment that reaps fruits, which, in turn, bring about happiness for the child and the parent alike. Regarding my little ones, I can say that the minute I see that they succeed and feel good with what they’re doing, so that already makes me feel good and if we look at it in a wider perspective, then I really enjoy seeing their successes. After all, we invest years and years to get to it.

In this way, the happiness of one’s children is seen as a reflection of the parent. Happiness is perceived as attainable if one makes an effort to achieve goals that are likely to generate happiness. Similarly, for Yaffa, the pride derived from her children is experienced as a personal accomplishment contributing to happiness. When asked what makes her happy, she replies, “Like looking from the side and seeing what we’ve achieved, where they’ve gotten, how…like seeing… being proud, from the side, of who they are. Their partners, girlfriends, all those things, really.” Here, too, there is an element of onlooker observing “from the side.” Interestingly, Yaffa changes from we to they, saying “what we’ve achieved, where they’ve gotten,” suggesting that the children’s achievements are experienced as the parents’ achievement. Children’s successes were defined widely, with participants giving a range of examples such as school achievements, becoming a counselor in a youth movement, participating in music recordings, relationships with partners or siblings, or independence. What all had in common was the child’s positive feelings that was projected onto parents who experienced these as happiness, as well as a sense of accomplishment which generated feelings of self-efficacy. As well as indicating children or the nuclear family as a source of happiness, some participants referred to extended family. When asked what makes her happy, Leah replies, “first and foremost, it’s my family and my children and S (husband). My parents, my siblings, the extended family.” Beth ties the centrality of family with the highlight of her week, Friday night dinners with her extended family. She explains why it is important to her saying, “besides them I don’t have anyone else in this life. I have

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friends, I have good friends but.. reality has proven to me that your family is the most important thing in life and the most real that there is. Everything else is temporary.” Just as Leah indicated family as the “first and foremost” source of her happiness, for Beth, too, family is “the most important thing in life,” since it represents constancy and dependability as opposed to other things in life, which may be perceived as transitory. Happiness derived from family is thus implied to be a source of meaning.

Giving The value of giving to others also emerged in relation to the community. Just as family time was considered quality time, helping others outside the family was perceived as worthy and, like family, was associated with happiness and meaning. For Yaron, giving to others is presented as a life philosophy. Its meaningfulness lies in the individual’s power to make a difference in society. My motto in life is that if each one of us were to contribute 2 or 3 hours a week to the community, doesn’t matter in what area, there are lots and lots of things that you can help with, I think that our society would look different.

The opportunity to give to others was found to be an important motive for many free time practices, whether it was hosting family or friends in one’s home, giving of ones’ time by listening to a friend or volunteering. We have seen that, for some, part of the pleasure in hosting guests, for example, was being able to give others. Eran says, “Things I do for others and give them pleasure, give me pleasure too.” Other participants related to the act of giving as a worthy value that elevated the public good over the individual’s desires. Maddy, raises the question of how time, particularly free time, is linked to such an outlook. I personally think that life is doing also things for other people. That’s my life, being a mother, being a wife, being you know, a psychologist. It’s a chance to do things for other people …

For Maddy, being able to do things for others is the essence of her life. She sees it as central to her relationships as well as her profession.

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Rather than being described as a purely altruistic act, giving was experienced by many as contributing to positive feelings. If one feels that one’s actions are significant to others, this may lead to feelings of satisfaction and self-worth, as we see in the following quote, “if I manage to sort of help friends or listen to people or, you know I feel like I made a difference with someone, I feel good about myself.” Perhaps the feelings of satisfaction are rooted in a sense of moral achievement. This may also serve to motivate the individual, since these positive feelings may inspire further action. Neta, who volunteers in several areas, indicates her upbringing as shaping her outlook. Attempting to explain her motives, she enumerates the influences and principles behind her volunteering. I grew up in a home like that. My parents volunteered and did all their lives…I believe that if we don’t do for each other, we are simply raising a generation of egoists and a very, very difficult society. And I really believe in a society where one helps the other because if not, we don’t have an existence. We will become egoistic creatures where there’s no difference between animals and us and the more you give to others, you derive enormous satisfaction and you see how happy your life is. It puts things in proportion.

For Neta, helping others is a necessary part of life or as another participant says, “it is a must.” She believes it infuses life with existential meaning, which distinguishes human beings from animals. Yet this does not mean that she perceives it as a duty based solely on self-abnegation. On the contrary, she says, “I am happy doing it because it gives me satisfaction.” Indeed, volunteering was presented as morally worthy as well as being experienced as positive for the self. It was described as a regular activity by 34.2% of participants who reported spending more than 2 hours each time they volunteered. The types of volunteering varied as did the frequency, yet the motivation for participation in volunteer activities was surprisingly similar among various participants. Like family and other forms of social interaction, it was considered a source of happiness that was more than just fun. Volunteering was associated with meaningfulness experienced by participants as contributing to the giver as well as the receiver.

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A number volunteered in a local charity that distributes food packages to needy families in cities nearby. One helped out in hospitals, another in an ambulance, one volunteered with the police and others taught underprivileged children. Three participants reported working in an organization that sends volunteers to families in order to coach them about home budgeting. Liron describes what it entails: meetings in people’s homes, reports, excel sheets, follow-ups, correspondence and courses. He then explains his motives saying, To give someone a fishing rod rather than the fish. It suits my outlook, what I can do, it suits my abilities, my experience. Economic knowledge and how to act. So now say why do I do it? Because I enjoy it. Because I definitely think it is part of..the place where I need to be at the moment and that’s what I do, I feel that it’s excellent…When you fulfill an inner need you enjoy it. And at the moment it’s a basic need for me so I do it both from the aspect of inner work on thoughts as well as the thing of giving which connect one to the other.

Liron acknowledges a certain duality in his motivation for volunteering. On the one hand, he suggests that it is rooted in a life view. On the other hand, he indicates pleasure as the primary motive. However, though he uses the word “enjoy,” by using the word “fulfill,” he clarifies that it is a meaningful form of enjoyment. For him, volunteering contributes to the self, by fulfilling a basic inner need. Many volunteers indicated self-fulfillment as both a result and a motive. For Denny, who volunteers in three different organizations, the opportunity to help others is presented as a means of contributing to the self. He says, “I like giving, I like helping people. I also do it for myself because I get fulfilled from it and by the way other people benefit.” He does not present volunteering as an onerous duty, but considers it free time. He explains, “that’s free time for me. Because I am doing something I want and like. It’s not when I sit and have a cup of coffee looking at people and staring into space.” For him, a sense of choice and pleasure is essential in defining it as free time. In addition, he suggests that the activeness of volunteering appeals to him as he contrasts it to sitting, looking and “staring into space.” Though he doesn’t explicitly say that it is energizing, clearly he experiences it as such. When the activity is linked to collective identity, meaning may be associated with a sense of belonging as well as contributing to the greater

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good. Neta is involved in various volunteering activities, including ­lecturing in schools. Being the daughter of a Holocaust survivor and, having lost her only brother in the Lebanon War, Neta shares her father’s story and her personal experience of bereavement in lectures that she gives in schools. She explains her motives saying, What guides me is that you do things that are important to you, even if it’s hard and it’s important to you so you enjoy it…I see what it does to them so it gives me tons of energy and strength. I see the importance of it. So the moment there is meaning in life, everything looks different.

Here, too, the sense of meaning is experienced as a source of personal strength, despite the difficult nature of the activity. During the interview, Neta expresses her feelings about her tragic loss and her personal connection to the Holocaust. She sees herself as a torchbearer who is imparting knowledge of her collective heritage. For her, it is considered a duty to pass on her feeling of belonging to a greater entity, which is an integral part of her identity. Because it is perceived as a contribution to future generations to whom she is conveying collective values, the actor is able to “enjoy” it, as it is an essential part of her meaningful self. This sense of the greater good is evident in Denny’s pride in his daughter’s military achievements, which he refers to, when asked what makes him happy. He says, “When my daughter got the ‘president’s excellence (award), it filled me with pride, when she got ‘excellence’ (award) in the officers’ course and was at the front of the line carrying the flag, it filled me with pride.” Besides feelings of personal satisfaction associated with the achievements of one’s children, which we have seen earlier, the mention of the flag highlights the sense of national pride which is experienced as meaningful. In this way, the army is associated with purpose and meaning since it is perceived as a means to contribute to the greater good. Interestingly, too, the value of giving to others emerged when participants were asked what they would do with their time if money were not a consideration. A number of them said they would stop working and volunteer. One said she would like to teach meditation to people who can’t afford to pay. Others indicated their wish to work with children in schools or volunteer in hospitals. Some talked of their plans to volunteer after retirement. This suggests that contributing to the community was perceived as an ideal worth pursuing and a meaningful way to spend one’s time.

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Happiness in the “Simple Things” Family and giving to others were indicated as central to a meaningful self. Participants presented it as a life philosophy that imbued their lives with purpose and meaning. On the other hand, a salient theme of happiness that emerged was the appreciation of the simple things in life. This understanding of happiness highlights, as we have seen in relation to family, a thankful, modest approach to everyday, seemingly mundane parts of life. This duality is evident in the following quote that indicates the simple things as a source of happiness, while also pointing to the common good as a crucial component of happiness. What makes me happy? Loads of things. When people feel good, people’s smiles, beauty, nature, sunrises, sunsets. When I see good. When I see good people, when I see good deeds, when I see good energies, when I see life happiness, when I see blossoming, blooming. Many things. Egoistic people annoy me, bad people annoy me. It annoys me when people are involved with nonsense, when they only think of themselves. Politics annoys me, many things annoy me. So as not to get annoyed, you do things.

The dichotomous distinction between good and bad accentuates moral commitment to the greater good as essential for happiness and meaning. The speaker equates nature and good people with goodness. The binary oppositions suggest, as we have seen earlier, that preoccupation with the self is unacceptable and may be an obstacle to happiness whereas good deeds lead to happiness. Interestingly, however, the speaker does not relegate self-oriented pleasure such as aesthetic appreciation, but rather advocates the importance of balancing the personal and collective by contributing to others, not “only” oneself. Yet the last sentence illustrates the therapeutic value of doing things for others, as it serves as a means with which to counter negative feelings. Many participants highlighted their gratefulness for everyday, simple things that may be ordinarily taken for granted. Yaron says, “Look, I wake up in the morning, I say, don’t laugh at me, I’m not religious, but in my heart I say, God, thank you that I woke up.” The reference to God, as we saw earlier, colors the speaker’s words with a meaningfulness that may otherwise pass unnoticed in his words. Like Yaron, Denny does not

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define himself as a religious man yet he, too, refers to God to illustrate his thankfulness for the simple things, saying, “Sitting at home is a kind of pleasure. If you run all the time, overall God has blessed me and thanks, I say thank you every day, every morning.” The fact that he verbalizes his gratitude indicates the high value that he attaches to what may seem banal. Others did not articulate thankfulness but still implied an appreciation of the simple things. Efrat says, “a lot of little things make me happy.” She explains by giving examples, “on holidays, if I find a nice place then I simply.. I enjoy things like that or.. good coffee in the morning, or a good café with great cake. That, I can really enjoy little things.” While she relates to hedonic pleasures, the fact that they are classified as “little things” seems to imply an inner state of satisfaction that is based on modest expectations, “when you’re happy with what you have,” as another participant puts it. This inner contentment with life emerged as a life philosophy of being happy with one’s lot as the following suggests, “It’s a matter of outlook to enjoy the moment as much as possible. I try, I try, Life is precious.” In this way, a positive approach was perceived as adding meaning to life. The repetition of the word “try,” suggests that a positive outlook is worth working on and, it seems that meaning may be attained by acknowledging the value of life. Happiness is presented here as a consequence of one’s subjective mindset. A conception of happiness as an inner feeling was expressed as a sense of feeling “whole.” Vera describes happiness as, “a kind of inner feeling that.. an inner experience that everything is like perfect. You know, not perfect but whole…feeling whole with myself, inside…you can’t plan it.” For Vera, happiness is an inner state. Consequently, she says it can be experienced through free time activities such as dancing or singing but also through simple things, like “just sitting at home” when, as she says, “it suddenly lands” on her. She describes it as “a kind of moment that I grasp that a certain doing, like it fills me, I feel good.” While her understanding of happiness is presented as an inner, momentary experience, as Vera continues to grapple with the concept, it becomes apparent that, for her, happiness is intricately interwoven with meaning and purpose in life. I think the question of happiness is really where to.. that’s exactly where it leads. To know who you are, what you are. What you..what .. where, where, what life is for you. Like in other words, what are you doing in this life? What is happening to you? Are you alive?…so happiness, yes, is being.

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The questions she raises link life goals with a sense of identity. Yet, for Vera, happiness is also defined as simply “being.” The above quotes seem to suggest that happiness may be determined by the way one experiences life and the meaning afforded to those experiences.

Self-Oriented Happiness As we have seen, happiness was indicated as being derived from varied sources and activities. While some practices were other-directed, participants also pointed to self-oriented activities. Responding to the question of what makes him happy, Abe refers to, “a good book, good music, a good game that I watch, photography. A good meal, good wine.” On the one hand, the list can be understood as simple things, yet the repeated use of the word “good” suggests that quality contributes to the level of one’s happiness. In this way, being able to experience something “good” may lead to a feeling of self-worth that, in turn, adds a sense of meaning. Moreover, it seems that when one feels free to pursue personal interests, this may enhance one’s sense of autonomy. If happiness is, “Doing whatever makes you feel good” as one participant puts it or “doing things that you like doing” as another defines it, then perhaps the activity is not what determines one’s sense of happiness but the element of choice, that creates a sense of autonomy. This dual conception of freedom as being free to choose and determine one’s actions together with the idea of being free from constraints on one’s autonomy are recurring themes that we have seen in previous chapters. The link between autonomy and happiness is clearly expressed by Debra, who, rather than describing happiness in terms of specific things, presents an all-embracing view of happiness that is rooted in freedom. She says, “What makes me happy? I love my life as it is. I like that I am, overall, master of my time…I can do what I like.” Her words suggest a sense of being happy with one’s lot, as we saw earlier, as well as satisfaction from a lifestyle experienced as agentic and autonomous. For Eden, this sense of freedom is experienced as happiness when she has time for herself. She says, “If I find a moment for myself for peace, that for me is happiness.” The feeling of tranquility that Eden describes does not suggest a happiness of fun or action but echoes the conception of happiness as “being” rather than doing. For others, happiness was associated with a sense of achievement. This was experienced through one’s children, as we saw earlier, but it also

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emerged as a matter of personal satisfaction as we see in Efrat’s words, “when I fulfill things that I set for myself. That brings me happiness.” This goal-oriented approach was central to conceptions of individual achievement. For Eran, this includes success at work, which he equates with happiness. He says, “Success makes me happy. When I succeed to do things. That means that some of my work is a kind of happiness.” This source of satisfaction from work emerged as twofold. Firstly, the attainment of a set goal was experienced as personally fulfilling. But the following quote suggests that contributing to others as well as their acknowledgment of a job well done, led to positive feelings about the self, though not necessarily defined as happiness. As Daniel, a computer programmer suggests, “Accomplishing something whether it be at work, a project … that makes me feel good about myself especially if I know everyone is happy with it.” Daniel’s feelings of accomplishment are enhanced by the satisfaction of his colleagues. Similarly, Ilana indicates the contribution of external feedback toward her sense of self-worth, saying, “When I feel good at work and people commend me.” Yet, feeling good about oneself was not necessarily equated with happiness. This distinction is noted by Sarit who says, I feel very good at work, but I wouldn’t call it happiness. It’s a sense of doing, a very good feeling, I really like my work but I think that real happiness is mainly family, mostly the immediate family and the extended family.

For Sarit, a sense of personal achievement may make her feel good, yet family is a source of true happiness, which is associated with meaningfulness.

The Big Picture In order to promote reflection about contentment from their lifestyles, participants were asked to express their views about a commonly used phrase—I want to start living. This was designed to address the question of time pressure and elucidate the extent to which time was perceived as a constraint on participants’ sense of autonomy, which may, in turn, be experienced as an obstacle to happiness. By asking different types of questions, I hoped to better understand multilayered perspectives relating to happiness and meaning. In addition, the presentation of a widely

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used phrase may allow the participants to take on the point of view of others, on the one hand, while, at the same time, being more reflexive about their own feelings regarding the statement. Responses to this question were quite surprising, considering the large body of literature (see Chapter 2) suggesting a sense of pressure, time famine, and harriedness. In fact, when asked to respond to the phrase, almost all participants conveyed feelings of satisfaction as well as an appreciation for what they have. Adina’s words express this sense of contentment, “I don’t feel like I am missing anything in life. I’m happy with what I have.” Maddy responds emphatically to the phrase, saying, “I certainly don’t feel that way. I think I am [living], it’s just life, I really don’t see that.” Yet, she makes an effort to grasp the perspective of others as she continues, “I mean I can understand some people would see it as, I think when people say they want to start living they mean they want to start doing things for themselves.” Maddy suggests that the wish to invest time in the self is significant for many people yet she seems to be implying that it may be less meaningful than being thankful and appreciating life as it is. Others, despite their negative reaction to the phrase, did not ignore the question of time pressure as we see in Alon’s words, “No, I am.. What does that mean start living? If I want to do, I am living. Thank God we are doing what we want but I do want to reduce the pressure.” On the one hand, Alon emphasizes his control over his life, while, at the same time, his reference to God conveys gratitude and a sense of meaningfulness. Here too, not taking things for granted is presented as a worthy outlook central to the meaningful self, though he is aware that alleviating pressure may enhance his sense of well-being. The initial reaction of “I am living” was common among many participants although they often acknowledged constraints such as work or money. Others mentioned the fact that their children are older, as allowing them “much more space.” Thus, while constraints were not ignored, they were presented as less significant as opposed to the more meaningful aspects of life. As Itai said, “there are other things I would like to do of course but at the moment I don’t feel I have missed anything, really don’t feel in any area.” Thus, by disagreeing with the phrase, I want to start living, participants expressed a sense of appreciation and satisfaction from what they have, highlighting the approach of being happy with one’s lot, as contributing to meaningfulness.

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Besides questions relating to satisfaction from life, participants were also asked about their conceptions of the ideal man or woman. Posing the question by using the word “ideal,” was hoped to reveal what participants considered worthy and meaningful and perhaps shed light on culturally defined ideals, including socially accepted gender roles. Their perceptions revealed both individualistic and collective values, though family emerged as particularly meaningful for men and women alike. Beth, mother of 4 and full time nurse, describes the ideal woman as such, Someone who can both fulfill herself and also be the center of her family, get what she wants on the personal level what she wants in her life. Whether it’s a career, personal pleasures. That kind of thing. And at the same time continues to fulfill her roles as a woman. I’m very chauvinistic, I’m not a feminist…I think a woman should be the center of the home, the family.

While individual fulfillment is indicated as central to her conception of womanhood, she implies that family comes above personal needs, though she seems to feel that her confession may be perceived as old-fashioned and unprogressive. This dual conception of ideal womanhood was salient among female participants, most of whom ranked the role of mother and wife higher on the hierarchical ladder of worth. Like Beth, Ofrah values self-realization yet, for her, not only is it less important than family but it becomes worthless without family. A woman who manages to connect between self-realization and the ability to function in the home. Firstly as a wife and a mother…after that selfrealization. I think that if a woman manages to fulfill herself but doesn’t have her family behind her, it’s very.. it’s empty. And when there’s family you can manage without self-realization, like you can’t without family.

Leah, 38, mother of 4 young children who works full time, elaborates on the family role saying, “to be a good mum, to know how to be, I could say, to know how to be a good housewife, do all the cooking, baking, all that, be an amazing hostess.” Yet she specifies that the ideal woman should “also know how to take care of herself, find the time for yourself… somehow try to combine it all, also a career.” This conception of “Wonderwoman,” as Yehudit calls the ability “to combine career, and the home…” as well as

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being intelligent and looking good, was expressed by most of the female participants. In other words, female participants’ notion of the ideal woman indicated a traditional, gendered conception of womanhood. However, this is not to say that, when asked about the ideal man, male participants did not indicate family as central. On the contrary, most male participants put family first. Indeed family was central to men as well as women and the division of roles they indicated was very much in keeping with those of the female participants. Having said that, there was nevertheless a distinctive difference in how they talked about gender roles. While women spoke of what they considered their own roles, men also related to what they consider the woman’s role. For the male participants, being provider emerged as a male role, even though most women in the study worked. As Amos says, “First of all a good father, a good family man…of course also, he must also be successful or a good provider, as chauvinistic as that may sound.” As we saw in Beth’s words earlier, Amos reveals an awareness that his notion of an ideal man is rooted in a paternalistic approach. But after having said that, he goes on to describe the woman’s role saying, “In most cases the mother is the one who needs to be home a bit more.” The division of roles seems to be very clear. On the one hand, male participants indicated family as central to the ideal man, as we see in Daniel’s words, “I think someone who cares very much about his family, he is very worried about putting them above everything else.” On the other hand, as he continues, the gendered division between the private and public domain become evident. …she is the one who rules the home a bit better than the man and the man, because of the fact that he is the one that must always go out to work, so he must make a living, provide well for his family.

Only one male participant, when asked about the ideal man, makes mention of his wife’s role as provider saying, “good father, spouse, I wouldn’t say breadwinner, my wife would be angry-she makes at least the same if not more.” While men also talked of being “supportive and attentive” to their families it was presented as an additional quality besides the gender roles above. Moreover, although family was also found to be central among female participants, it is interesting to note that women, more than men also referred to individualistic values such as self- realization. Besides revealing the traditional conceptions related to gender roles, the above notions of the ideal woman and ideal man, shed light on

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what is considered important and meaningful. Certainly, this supports the findings at the beginning of the chapter, which indicated family as highly valorized and the number one source of happiness associated with a meaningful self.

Discussion The current chapter has focused on meaningfulness as it emerged through open-ended questions designed to promote reflection about notions of happiness, inner needs and conceptions of worthy selfhood. The reader may ask her/himself how all this helps us with the question of free time. Perhaps by gaining insight into how people experience happiness and what they consider to be meaningful, we may better understand why people do what they do, particularly during free time, which is associated with freedom of choice. When asked about happiness as opposed to pleasure, participants revealed what has “significance” for them. The word “happiness” was interpreted by participants in a eudaimonic sense, as the realization of life goals and doing what is worth doing (Ryan and Deci 2001; Waterman et al. 2006), whereas pleasure was associated with hedonic gratification. This philosophical distinction between the Aristotelian eudaimonic idea of happiness and the hedonic approach of Aristippus or Bentham (see Chapter 2), has been addressed in psychological studies of happiness, which often prefer the term well-being when relating to the former. Consistent with results from such research, participants referred to family as a major source of happiness. Past studies have found social connections to be positively correlated to meaning and happiness, with family being indicated as the most prominent factor (Baumeister et al. 2013; Baumeister and Leary 1995; Kahneman et al. 2004; MacKenzie and Baumeister 2014). The current study, being qualitative, enabled participants to express their thoughts about happiness from family, describing it as an inner feeling of contentment evoked by simply being together or from observation rather than resulting from specific activities. The emphasis on “seeing,” stressed this sense of contentment and gratitude, while reflecting on achievements was presented as satisfaction and fulfillment. Meaningfulness is also linked to giving to others (Baumeister et al. 2013) which participants experienced as fulfilling. It was associated with values and goals and described as making a difference. In other words, giving

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to others was conceived as contributing to the greater good, this being another aspect of Aristotlian eudaimonia linked to the practice of virtues or the “highest good.” At the same time, it was described by participants as making them feel good so that, even volunteering, was not construed as altruistic but as contributing to the self as much as to others. These aspects indicated by the participants of the study are in keeping with surveys that indicate generosity, and freedom to make life choices, as factors contributing to happiness (World Happiness Report 2017).1 While family and helping others emerged as “important” values associated with meaning and purpose, participants also referred to seemingly mundane, simple things, to define happiness. This was presented as a life philosophy whereby the appreciation of the simple things in life is rooted in gratitude and a modest approach to happiness and meaning. While participants did refer to specific practices as making them happy, it was not the activity itself that was indicated as significant, but rather the inner state of “tranquility, serenity and peace,” that the participant experienced, particularly when it was conceived as being directed to the self. As we have seen in previous chapters, everyday practices were indicated as positively experienced even when not conceived as valuable in the sense that they are productive or culturally valued. But what brings about this inner state and why is it linked to meaningfulness? Once again, a sense of freedom may be the key to answering these questions. Feeling free from being active, whether related to duties or not, may enhance one’s sense of inner peace. In this way, as well as generating a feeling of “tranquility,” when one is free from activeness, it provides an opportunity to sit back and observe, reflect and acknowledge one’s good fortune so that it is conceived as meaningful. The above findings suggest that as well as being free from busyness, the individual also experiences a sense of freedom to simply be, to feel contentment and gratitude that is linked to a sense of inner peace. Moreover, the individual may feel free to be her/himself and the feeling of authenticity may contribute to a sense of meaning, implying a eudaimonistic notion of happiness of living in a manner consistent to one’s daimon or true self (Ryff and Singer 2008; Waterman et al. 2006). This may include the freedom to realize one’s true potential (Ryff 1995) and actualize values that the individual considers to be “important.” Waterman (1993) suggests that when one acts in keeping with deeply held values, eudaimonia can be reached. Volunteering, for example, conceived as free choice, is experienced as satisfaction, fulfillment and

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accomplishment (Henderson 1984; Parker 1992; Silber 2011; Stebbins 1996). Meaning was thus linked to a sense of purpose as well as harmony, both of which have been indicated in past research as crucial to profound happiness (Baumeister 1991; Csikszentmihalyi 1990; Delle Fave et al. 2011). We have seen that meaningfulness is perceived as being associated with values and goals, while also experienced as an inner feeling. Moreover, freedom was found to enhance one’s sense of meaning. Yet, what is the significance of meaning for the self? In what way does it motivate human action? How is it linked to culture? In his seminal book, Man’s Search for Meaning, Viktor Frankl (1959/2006) investigates the role of meaning for human beings even amidst the horrors of Auschwitz concentration camp. He points to values and purpose, rather than pleasure, as motivating the individual. According to Giddens (1984) motivation is unconscious and rooted in the need for “ontological security”—a sense of meaningfulness and stability in one’s life. The above findings support these notions of meaning, yet they suggest that meaning is also derived from the fulfillment of personal needs associated with the enhancement of feelings about the self. Indeed, Baumeister (1991) indicates four needs for meaning that include purpose, value and justification, efficacy and self-worth. When these needs are satisfied, he says, the individual regards life as existentially meaningful. The need for purpose is concerned with goals so that the present may be considered meaningful if leading to desirable outcomes. For example, participants derived meaning from setting and fulfilling goals of worthy parenting. The second need, explains Baumeister, is the need to justify actions according to moral standards. This involves the acceptance and application of culturally shared values, such as family, being happy with one’s lot or contributing to the greater good. The third, self-efficacy, refers to a sense of control over one’s environment and one’s life which was evident, for instance, in the belief that one can “make a difference.” Finally, self-worth refers to the need to feel that one is worthy and good. Feedback from others, as we saw, was considered to be a valuable source of information that was experienced as contributing to feelings of self-worth. Given the above findings, it appears that meaningfulness is intricately linked to culture since values, notions of happiness and moral good are not only shaped by culture but also used to evaluate meaningfulness in life (Baumeister et al. 2013). If, for example, putting family first, succeeding at work or giving to one’s country are cultural ideals that are

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socially accepted as worthy values, then these are also seen as meaningful. As Illouz (2003) writes, “culture bestows on our actions a sense of ‘purpose’ and ‘meaning’ through a realm of values” (p. 7). Even one’s very definitions of happiness or expectations for meaningfulness may be drawn from culture. From a Weberian perspective, we are cultural beings who share meanings, ideas and values which motivate our actions and the way we evaluate them. Similarly, Geertz (1973: 50) suggests that, as well as our ideas, values, and acts, even emotions, are cultural products. In this way, culture is closely related to the self, as meaningfulness in life draws from shared meanings on the one hand, while also being evaluated as a reflection on our selfhood. Culture is used by people “ to learn how to be” (Swidler 2001: 71) and ideal selves are thus construed in the ­context of culture, which shapes our very notions of a meaningful life. Yet this does not imply a passive subject that has no freedom at all. On the contrary, as I have suggested earlier, freedom may be a decisive factor in generating a feeling of happiness and finding meaningfulness may actually suggest agency. The Meaningful Self that we have seen here echoes Charles Taylor’s (1985: 261) idea of an agent as having “intrinsic significance,” which he explains as “a being to whom things matter.” In other words, values, purpose and significance are integral to agency. An agent, says Taylor, is able to “make life-plans, hold values, choose.” As a reflexive agent, the individual is, not only motivated by meaningfulness, but is also able to justify actions when viewed through the lens of “significance” and values. In this way, one can use culture and pursue happiness in the eudaimonic sense, feeling that one is being true to one’s self. The question of agency will be explored in greater depth in the final discussion in the next chapter.

Note 1. Israel was ranked 11th in the World Happiness Report in 2017 and 2018.

References Baumeister, Roy F. 1991. Meanings of Life. New York: Guilford Press. Baumeister, Roy F., and Mark R. Leary. 1995. The Need to Belong, Desire for Interpersonal Attachments as a Fundamental Human Motivation. Psychological Bulletin 117 (3): 497.

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Baumeister, Roy F., Kathleen D. Vohs, Jennifer L. Aaker, and Emily N. Garbinsky. 2013. Some Key Differences Between a Happy Life and a Meaningful Life. The Journal of Positive Psychology 8 (6): 505–516. Csikszentmihalyi, Mihalyi. 1990. Flow: The Psychology of Optimal Experience. New York: Harper Perennial. Davis, Wayne. 1981. Pleasure and Happiness. Philosophical Studies 39 (3): 305–317. Fave, Delle, Ingrid Brdar Antonella, Teresa Freire, Dianne Vella-Brodrick, and Marié P. Wissing. 2011. The Eudaimonic and Hedonic Components of Happiness: Qualitative and Quantitative Findings. Social Indicators Research 100 (2): 185–207. Frankl, Victor. E. [1959] 2006. Man’s Search for Meaning. Boston, MA: Beacon Press. Geertz, Clifford. 1973. Thick Description: Toward an Interpretive Theory of Culture. The Interpretation of Cultures: Selected Essays, 3–30. New York: Basic Books. Giddens, Anthony. 1984. The Constitution of Society: Outline of the Theory of Structuration. Berkeley and Los Angeles: University of California Press. Henderson, Karla. 1984. Volunteerism as Leisure. Nonprofit and Voluntary Sector Quarterly 13 (1): 55–63. Illouz, Eva. 2003. Oprah Winfrey and the Glamour of Misery. New York: Columbia University Press. Kahneman, Daniel Alan, B. Krueger, David A. Schkade, Norbert Schwarz, and Arthur A. Stone. 2004. A Survey Method for Characterizing Daily Life Experience: The Day Reconstruction Method. Science 306 (5702): 1776–1780. MacKenzie, Michael J., and Roy F. Baumeister. 2014. Meaning in Life: Nature, Needs and Myths. In Meaning in Positive and Existential Psychology, ed. A. Batthyany and P. Russo-Netzer, 25–37. New York: Springer. Parker, Stanley R. 1992. Volunteering as Serious Leisure. Journal of Applied Recreation Research 17 (1): 1–11. Ryan, Richard M., and Edward L. Deci. 2001. On Happiness and Human Potentials: A Review of Research on Hedonic and Eudaimonic Well-Being. Annual Review of Psychology 52 (1): 141–166. Ryff, Carol D. 1995. Psychological Well-Being in Adult Life. Current Directions in Psychological Science 4 (4): 99–104. Ryff, Carol D., and Burton H. Singer. 2008. Know Thyself and Become What You Are: A Eudaimonic Approach to Psychological Well-Being. Journal of Happiness Studies 9 (1): 13–39. Silber, Ilana Friedrich. 2011. Emotions as Regime of Justification? The Case of Civic Anger. European Journal of Social Theory 14 (3): 301–320.

300  M. SHIR-WISE Stebbins, Robert A. 1996. Volunteering: A Serious Leisure Perspective. Nonprofit and Voluntary Sector Quarterly 25 (2): 211–224. Swidler, Anne. 2001. Talk of Love: How Culture Matters. Chicago: University of Chicago Press. Taylor, Charles. 1985. The Person. In The Category of the Person: Anthropology, Philosophy, History, ed. M. Carrithers, S. Collins, and S. Lukes, 257–282. Cambridge: Cambridge University Press. Waterman, Alan S. 1993. Two Conceptions of Happiness: Contrasts of Personal Expressiveness (Eudaimonia) and Hedonic Enjoyment. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology 64 (4): 678–691. Waterman, Alan S., Seth J. Schwartz, and Regina Conti. 2006. The Implications of Two Conceptions of Happiness (Hedonic Enjoyment and Eudaimonia) for the Understanding of Intrinsic Motivation. Journal of Happiness Studies 9: 41–79. World Happiness Report. 2017. Fifth World Happiness Report Ranks Happiest Countries. http://worldhappiness.report/news/2017/03/20/fifth-worldhappiness-report-2017-ranks-happiest-countries/. Accessed July 2018.

CHAPTER 10

Contradictory Free Time, Culture and Freedom

Conceptualizing Free Time At the onset of my research, I was interested in why people seem to be constantly pressured even in their free time. Why do they appear to be forever rushing in their daily lives? What makes so many people say that they “don’t have time”? The people I observed were not members of the working class who worked long hours in order to put food in the mouths of their children. On the contrary, they were upper-middle class people, who lived a comfortable lifestyle. Like the people Tocqueville (1969: 605) described as seemingly “the freest and best educated of men in circumstances the happiest,” the upper-middle class people I observed and spoke to, appeared to be “restless.” This led me to questions concerning freedom and agency as I considered how free, indeed, the individual is, even as s/he may be relatively free from objective factors such as economic restraints. I asked myself, to what extent do social structures and culture affect free time practices? How does culture shape thoughts, feelings and actions? When are we constrained by certain discourses and when are we able to resist them? It seemed to me that there was no better place to examine questions of freedom, structure and culture, than in free time, an arena considered to be “free.” Thus, I set out to explore free time, treating it as a tool with which to address these issues. I hoped to delve into meanings attached to actions, to gain insight into the way people manage the self, to investigate the © The Author(s) 2019 M. Shir-Wise, Time, Freedom and the Self, Leisure Studies in a Global Era, https://doi.org/10.1007/978-3-030-13841-7_10

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question of freedom and to better understand the role of culture in everyday life. My work was concerned, not only with what people do in their free time, but also how they perceive, interpret and experience it, and how free time is related to conceptions of happiness, freedom and the ideal self. I thus explored people’s evaluations of time: what is considered a worthy use of time and what is not? I wished to uncover why people perform various free time activities, to what extent they are motivated by a need for pleasure or happiness and how they may serve the self-project. And what do free time practices reveal about contemporary discourses related to the way we manage time and our selves? This book is hoped to have shed light on these questions. Time, Freedom and the Self, with its emphasis on “free” time, offers a critical and theoretical investigation of time, yet it also struggles with questions of agency and freedom, bringing together diverse theoretical perspectives, as it highlights the link between meaning and action in the context of culture. The very focus of this study on everyday free time, in itself emphasizes the importance of searching beyond the taken-for-granted, as it delves into notions of freedom and the self in contemporary society. Past research examining the relationship between work and leisure, the gender division of labor, or time scarcity has been linked to stress or conflict, whereas studies focusing on leisure and recreation, as well as time use surveys, have been more concerned with effects, types of activities and the amount of time spent on them. As discussed in Chapter 2, unlike such studies, the current research adds a distinctive focus of freedom to the exploration of free time. Since free time is associated with free will and choice, this study sought to illuminate people’s understandings of what is considered worthy and what is not. If, as opposed to other realms, free time is indeed envisaged as free, it is likely to be seen as a site for realizing and performing the quintessential, modern free self. Yet, as I have illustrated, conceptions of worthy selfhood and even happiness appear to be culturally constructed. Thus, while this book is an examination of time, it approaches time as the prism through which to tackle notions of freedom and the self, while also seeking to better conceptualize free time itself in the context of selfhood, freedom, and culture.

The Free Time Self The quantitative findings (Chapter 5, “Quantitative Mapping: What, Where, When and with Whom?”), based on data collected in questionnaires, indicated a wide array of free time practices performed in either

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the private or public domains, alone or with other people, partaking of or deviating from routine day-to-day life. Media use was found to dominate everyday free time, with television viewing being indicated as the most frequent, time-consuming free time activity, despite an increase in the use of computers and smartphones in recent years. Besides the use of various kinds of media, a substantial proportion of free time involved activities such as sport, reading and listening to music. Although many of these pastimes were done in the home, this did not imply isolation from others. On the contrary, much of the participants’ free time was reported to have been spent with family or friends, both in the private and public domains. Family time included time with one’s spouse or children, but also with extended family. Social time, such as inviting guests or being hosted by friends, going on trips, or to restaurants, was indicated by a high percentage of participants. In addition to social practices, a large majority reported having gone to the hairdresser or barber, as well as clothes shopping in the month preceding the interview, while shopping for cosmetics or having beauty treatment were activities reported predominantly by women. The questionnaires thus provided information regarding what, how often and how long free time activities were performed, and with whom they were done. The oral interviews, on the other hand, focused on subjective meanings attached to free time, allowing participants to express how they felt and how they perceived and evaluated free time. The qualitative findings revealed that various free time activities were experienced in different ways, though participants’ descriptions were strikingly similar, suggesting rather uniform patterns and the strong impact of a shared pool of practical and cultural options. Watching television, reading, sport, social outings and family time, were described as pleasure but also as an escape. Certain pastimes were regarded as crucial for the self, whereas others were valued for their interactive or bonding qualities. Participants described time with family or friends, sport and reading, as their favorite pastimes. Yet when asked what they would like to do if they had more free time, they mainly indicated what Stebbins (2001) calls, “serious leisure,” that is profound, long-lasting activities that captivate the participant. When talking about happiness, participants referred to family and giving to others, as well as appreciation of the simple things, such as “just sitting at home.” Findings from interviews with local key figures (Chapter 3), provided insight into the characteristics of the town, Topaz, which was described by them, as communal and family-oriented, with a high socio-economic

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level and a harmonious relationship between its religious and irreligious residents. It was portrayed as an ideal, suburban environment for raising children, offering many family events as well as a range of enrichment activities considered valuable for self-development. The town was characterized as “middle plus,” with residents working long hours, leading an upper-middle class lifestyle and demanding high-quality free time activities. This description of Topaz served as a context in which to better understand the participants of the study and their lifestyles. In addition, it illuminated the way in which social structures may determine availability of free time activities and shape the way time is spent. The examination of local texts revealed a wide range of free time options available in the town, such as sports activities, or various enrichment classes, as well as shedding light on cultural scripts to which residents of the town are exposed. The local magazine presented advertisements and articles replete with narratives conveying themes of self-work and achievement, individuality, family and national values. Participants’ conceptual definitions of free time (Chapter 4) indicated freedom as the central thematic thread, suggesting a notion of free time as “free” on two levels. Firstly, it emerged as freedom from work, domestic duties and commitments to others and oneself. It was conceived as time that is free from such duties, but also free from the psychological burden resulting from them. Secondly, free time was defined as a time when one is free to choose to act as one wishes, with control and autonomy being indicated as central. Thus, it was described, not only as a time to relax and escape the pressures of day-to-day obligations, but also as an opportunity to devote time to the self. This distinction between freedom from and freedom to, echoing Erich Fromm’s (1942/1984) discussion of freedom, was confirmed again in the hierarchization of free time practices presented in Chapter 5, “Subjective Mapping: The Hierarchization of Free Time.” This term was offered in order to conceptualize the ways in which individuals interpret and rank their free time according to the perceived value of an activity. The chapter presents participants’ responses to questions about pleasure and their favorite free time, as well as hypothetical questions, such as what they would do if they had more free time or if money were not a consideration. This encouraged participants to imagine possibilities outside the constraints of reality, and shed light on what is considered worthy and desirable.

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The notion of freedom from commitments and pressure emerged in participants’ indication of relaxation as a salient motive and result of free time activities, ranging from everyday practices such as walking, reading or watching television, to nature trips and vacations. These were described as pleasure, as uninterrupted time for the self and as an escape from everyday duties or pressure. Devoting time to the self was found to be central to the very idea of pleasure, experienced as freedom to pursue activities of one’s choice. The following chapters aimed to further illuminate what qualifies free time as positive and worthy by exploring various facets of the self that unfolded in participants’ descriptions of free time use. At the same time, attention was given to cultural and discursive influences that may mold ideas of what is worthy and what is not, thereby shaping action and meaning. While participants’ conceptual understandings of free time drew from liberal discourses of individualism, my findings suggest that certain free time practices and our understanding of them, may be influenced by capitalistic principles of work and productivity, that encourage the efficient utilization of free time. The language, as well as the practices reported by participants, conveyed a Productive Self (Chapter 6) which links free time with the work ethic, thereby challenging traditional distinctions between work and free time. Thus, although participants’ definitions of free time, like those in leisure research, revealed a distinct dichotomy between work and free time, my findings suggest that free time is imbued with principles of work. Similarly, certain practices are shaped by the therapeutic ethos promoting self-improvement through self-management. However, while therapeutic discourse is guided by utilitarian ideals of hard work and self-discipline, it also draws upon individualistic tenets of free will, entitlement and agency. In this way, self-cultivation was seen as freedom to invest in the self, but also conceived as a matter of personal responsibility so that failing to perform self-improvement practices, such as bodywork, was experienced as inadequacy. The concept, disciplined freedom (Shir-Wise 2018) was used to address this contradiction whereby individualistic values of entitlement and individuality create a sense of freedom, while the work ethic along with the therapeutic ethos, discipline individuals to work toward a goal as a means of achieving desirable outcomes. Consumption (Chapter 7, “The Commercialization of Free Time”) was found to be central to many such self-management practices. Findings showed that besides shopping, a large proportion of free time activities involved the consumption of services linked to self-improvement,

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such as sport clubs or spiritual coachers. Yet participants also reported the consumption of hedonic pleasures provided by spas, restaurants or other services. In this way, consumer culture promotes the investment of time and money toward self-work, while also encouraging the hedonic pursuit of pleasure. Participants thus experienced consumption as freedom to invest in the self, whereas self-indulgence was also conceived as freedom from external constraints. Media consumption (Chapter 7, “Media and Free Time”), however, was described neither as self-investment nor as indulgence. On the contrary, media practices, particularly television viewing, were presented as relaxing, as freedom from daily pressure, commitments and emotional stress. Yet participants’ experience of media use was found to be ambivalent, with many practices also being experienced and evaluated negatively, and perceived as requiring resistive measures. More than any other pastime, television was considered a waste of time. Paradoxically, its major appeal was indicated as being precisely in its sense of escape from productivity, busyness and commitment. Ambivalence was also evident in participants’ descriptions of computer and cellphone use, which were described as useful, yet participants also related to a strong sense of dependence. These findings thus reveal contradictory evaluations, motives and experiences. On the one hand, free time emerged as a site for self-work, designed to achieve a desirable self in keeping with cultural scripts. On the other hand, it was experienced as a form of escape from the constant demands of the self-project, yet still shaped by cultural prescriptions for happiness. In the same vein, The Family Self (Chapter 8) too, revealed a duality concerning identity and interpersonal relationships. As opposed to committed time, free time with the family was experienced as free from duties, enjoyable and valuable. It emerged as a sphere of emotional comfort and familiarity, where the individual can relax impression management, thereby generating a sense of authenticity. In this way, family time was conceived as freedom to be oneself, and spending time with spouses and children, as freedom to invest in relationships. Yet, the findings suggested that The Family Self may also be an extension of the self-project as one strives to meet cultural expectations of the ideal mother, father or partner. Thus the discourse of productivity intertwined here again with therapeutic principles, calling for the optimal utilization of time in view of nurturing relationships. While men placed greater emphasis on simply spending time with family, women linked verbal communication and a

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child-centered approach with the idea of quality time, as well as presenting self-sacrifice as a matter of choice. It seems that cultural prescriptions and gender roles are thus justified by drawing on individualistic notions of freedom. The Social Self appeared, not only in connection to family time, but also in social interaction with friends (Chapter 8, “The Sociable Self”), which was experienced as pleasure, as a form of release, and as fostering a sense of belonging. Socializing in groups was considered to be fun and an escape from daily commitments, whereas dyadic interaction, was described by many, as their favorite pastime, and associated, particularly among female participants, with support and worth. Participants reported socializing in cafes, during weekend trips, and in the private domain, with a high percentage reporting a large amount of time being spent on entertaining in one’s home or being invited to friends. Social interaction also took place in group activities, such as sport, as well as in volunteering which was described as fulfilling. The high value attached to social engagement was an unexpected finding, considering the individualistic emphasis on self-realization and self-management evident in other free time practices. Moreover, although social interaction is often associated with a pervasive need for impression management or reciprocity, participants described socializing as enjoyable and relaxing, without expressing a sense of duty. The final chapter of findings (Chapter 9) presents The Meaningful Self, which emerged in participants’ responses when asked about happiness and questions pertaining to satisfaction from one’s lifestyle and conceptions of the ideal self. The chapter exposes a distinction between participants’ conceptions of pleasure and happiness, both of which may motivate the individual’s free time practices, though only the latter, i.e. happiness, tended to be interpreted in a eudaimonic sense, as the realization of life goals and doing what is worth doing (Ryan and Deci 2001; Waterman et al. 2006). Participants indicated family and giving to others as a major source of happiness and central to a meaningful self. These notions of happiness and meaning, along with the traditional practices reported by participants, reflect collectivist, familistic values, rooted in Jewish culture. Yet, while family and helping others were seen as “important” values associated with meaning and purpose, participants also referred to seemingly mundane, simple things to define happiness. This was presented as a life philosophy whereby appreciation of the simple things in life is based on gratitude and a modest approach to happiness

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and meaning. These findings suggest that as well as being free from busyness, the individual also experiences a sense of freedom to simply be, to feel contentment and gratitude for what may ordinarily be taken for granted.

Free Time in Context In order to further add to our understanding of the above findings, we must take into account structural factors such as class, family status, location and the Israeli context of the study.1 Social structures affect the practical use of free time, while cultural and discursive influences shape how we think about time and the self. As discussed in Chapter 2, the characteristics of the sample may imply certain dominant discourses as well as practical considerations to which I now direct my attention. The first point of consideration is the social structure of a Yishuv, where the participants of the study live. The fact that it is a suburban town, rather than a city, is significant since this kind of location is thought to provide favorable conditions for family life, as we saw in findings from interviews with key figures from the town (Chapter 3). The Yishuv may be the Israeli version of the suburbs, a central image in the American dream, associated with success but also an idyllic lifestyle. In addition, such towns have a communal atmosphere, thus people who choose to live there may be more family-oriented and community-minded to begin with. An additional characteristic of the town is its high socio-economic status. My choice of an upper-middle class town (Yishuv) as the empirical setting for my investigation of free time was hoped to shed light on the conceptions of self and time among the middle classes in Israel, as I treat the sample as a prototype of Israeli middle class society. This is significant in a number of ways (see Chapter 2). Firstly, the social structure of the town may determine the availability of certain activities. The many local cultural and recreational options, such as the cinema, the country club and cultural center, which are readily accessible to residents of the town, allow a wide choice of free time possibilities. In addition, its close proximity to major cities, adds to the range of available options. On the other hand, while economic constraints limiting free time practices may be far less substantial in this sample than in lower class localities, the cultural expectations of upper-middle class living may demand greater financial investment in free time activities, particularly given the

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commercialization of leisure. Although participants did not convey a need to “keep up with the Joneses,” the key figures I interviewed suggested that social comparison may partially motivate free time practices. Indeed, whether consciously or not, one’s environment, accepted behavior and norms, may shape how free time is spent and how it is evaluated. Secondly, the material means available to the upper-middle class, may widen the choice of free time activities including those associated with “high” culture, for its members and their children, allowing them to accumulate cultural capital through the use of their free time. This, as well as a sense of entitlement, may play a significant role in shaping the personhood of the upper-middle classes. Thirdly, the higher levels of education and income among the middle classes may affect time use, since these have been found to be correlated to longer working hours and more time spent on childcare (Gershuny 2005; Katz et al. 2000; Offer and Schneider 2011; Robinson and Godbey 1997). This may lead to stress because of the many tasks members of this class feel they must manage, so that free time is “fragmented” (Beck and Arnold 2009). Perhaps then, although members of the upper-middle class may feel that busyness is a matter of choice, this may be an illusion of freedom. The middle classes have been commonly linked to individualistic discourses that promote autonomy and authenticity. My findings support past research which suggests that the middle classes are guided by utilitarian discourses stressing the values of work, achievement and success, as well as drawing on individualistic principles of choice, self-realization and authenticity (Bellah 1985; Hochschild 1997; Skeggs 2005; Swidler 2001; Wuthnow 1998). This outcome-oriented approach combined with ideas of individuality, self- actualization and entitlement, are the basis for the therapeutic ethos which emerged as central among the study’s participants. The narrative of self-improvement also dovetails with the idea of self as lifestyle choices (Illouz 1997) and the notion of self-work as a means to a goal. These discursive constructs may explain the apparent pressure felt by the middle classes since values of work may affect the way they think (Wuthnow 1998), leading to longer working hours but also to more time and energy spent on self-work. Lastly, since the study examines a Jewish Israeli sample, collectivist, familistic values, anchored in Jewish tradition, may be particularly prominent (see Chapter 2). This could partially explain the valorization of family and social practices, however, the data from worldwide studies suggest

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that neither the importance attached to family time nor the frequency and time spent on socializing, are unique Israeli phenomena. On the contrary, family time, has been indicated as rising and highly valued in the U.S. and other countries. Similarly, time use surveys examining various countries, point to socializing as a widespread free time practice (see Chapter 8). Having said that, it is still likely that the strong emphasis on the importance of family and children in Jewish culture and Israeli society, colored participants’ reflections about happiness and meaning and shaped traditional practices.2 An additional factor that may affect participants’ free time is the tension of living in a state of national insecurity, where war and terrorist attacks are part of life. This possibly intensifies the need to escape in free time, which thus serves as a site for withdrawal from the ontological uncertainty of everyday life. In this way, free time may be conceived as freedom from the threats of the macrocosmic world as one retreats into the comfortable, familiar and safe microcosm. Socializing with friends or spending time with family may, besides being a form of escape, also contribute to a needed sense of solidarity and togetherness. Furthermore, when faced with existential questions, individuals may be more likely to feel gratitude for that which is perceived as giving purpose and meaningfulness in life, to find meaning in the taken-for-granted, and to feel contentment from the “simple things.”

Differences: Religiosity and Gender As already indicated above, the picture that emerged from both the quantitative and qualitative findings tended to be for the most part rather strikingly homogenous. However, gender differences were evident, as well as certain differences and similarities between religious and irreligious participants. Interestingly, while religious and irreligious groups were found to be rather similar in conceptions of self and free time, as well as actual practices, a number of differences did emerge. The first was that religious participants, who observe Shabbat, spent their weekends primarily in the private domain and refrained from media use during the Shabbat. This generated a more pronounced sense of escape and intensified feelings of family quality time. An additional finding linked to the level of religiosity, was that the high value attached to the idea of self-sacrifice for one’s family emerged more prominently among religious mothers.

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Lastly, 75% of those who reported volunteering, defined themselves as religious or traditional. These findings suggest that traditional gender roles and the importance of children and communal work, may be rooted in Jewish religious values of family,3 community and giving to others.4 However, free time activities, wishes for free time, and conceptions of free time and happiness, were found to be surprisingly similar among participants of varying religious levels. This may be explained by the fact that the religious participants categorized themselves as “modern religious,” thus they are likely to share with participants of other religious levels, common cultural pools that may shape, not only free time practices but also the way they think about various issues. In contrast, as we have seen, my findings indicated a number of gender differences, to which I now direct further attention. Despite the centrality of individualistic values of self-realization, freedom and selfreliance, the findings of the present study suggest traditional understandings of gender roles and identities. Ostensibly, gender equality seemed to be evident in male participants’ reports of their share in domestic tasks and childcare, and the fact that the majority of women worked outside the home. Moreover, neither male nor female participants related to conflicts concerning the unequal division of domestic or childcare roles. However, the absence of a feminist perspective was evident in nuances as well as reported activities and traditional views expressed by participants. The most explicit of these expressions was when participants were asked how they envisage the ideal man or woman (see Chapter 9). While family emerged as central among both female and male participants, traditional gender roles were indicated as men related to the male role of provider and women talked about being capable housewives and mothers. When male participants defined the ideal man, they compared male roles with women’s, whereas female participants did not express their thoughts about male roles, referring exclusively to their own. Male participants made a clear distinction between the private domain dominated by women, and the public domain of work, perceived as the responsibility of men. A number of participants, both male and female, were conscious of the absence of a feminist perspective, using the word “chauvinist” to describe their own views. Considering the emphasis on individualism in the upper-middle class (discussed in Chapter 2), as well as Israeli women’s participation in the army, and the relatively high rate of employment of women in Israel, particularly among the more highly educated (OECD 2016),

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these findings were somewhat surprising. Yet, as has already been suggested, the notion of greater gender equality in Israel may well be a myth (Rom and Benjamin 2011; Swirski and Safir 1991). My findings support the claim that family and children are central values in Israeli society, and that “motherhood is the chief ideological icon and primary identity for most Israeli women regardless of their education, employment and career aspirations” (Remennick 2006: 24). Past research has found that while Israeli female middle class professionals, draw from global discourses of masculine productivity and individual success, they still follow local discourses with a familistic orientation, in which motherhood is central to their identities (Izraeli 1997; Frenkel 2008; Lieblich 1993). However, although the female participants in the present study envisaged the ideal woman as efficient and nurturing in domestic surroundings, unlike men, they referred to self-realization and self-fulfillment, and the ability to “combine it all,” in their descriptions of the ideal woman. In other words, although they indicated family and children as their top priority in life, they also drew from individualistic repertoires. It appears that female participants wished to show that their commitment to family was not at the expense of their own fulfillment. This was also evident in women’s emphasis on child-centered mothering, involving self-sacrifice on their part, yet still presented as a matter of choice. While accepting traditional ideals of “imperative motherhood,” (Remennick 2000) and ideologies of “intensive mothering” that serves men as well as children (Hays 1996), women still drew from individualistic notions of autonomy and choice. In this way, rather than being conceived as culturally constructed, their approach was experienced and presented as freedom. This may also account for the fact that questions of gender inequality did not come up in the interviews among either male or female participants. Despite the traditional division of gender roles, interestingly, women did not express a sense of unfairness or conflict regarding domestic or childcare duties. I suggest that individualistic discourses emphasizing free will and choice may mask the patriarchal narrative that reinforces such conceptions and practices. Moreover, given the valorization of individualistic perspectives, participants integrated ideals of freedom and agency into their self-presentation. Gender differences also emerged in participants’ definitions of free time, though more subtly. While both male and female participants defined free time as freedom from duties, men referred to both work and the home, whereas women primarily defined it as freedom from the

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obligation to others, which was experienced as a burden. When making reference to work as a source of stress, female participants experienced it as an encroachment on the private domain and on family life. Similarly having time for oneself, was described by men as simply being alone, as opposed to women who described it as freedom from domestic and childcare duties. These findings illustrate a gendered dichotomization between the feminine, private realm of emotions and the masculine, public domain of rationality (McGee 2005; Wright 2011). Gender differences also emerged in conceptions and practices concerning the body. While both male and female participants perceived bodywork as a responsibility requiring self-discipline, for women, more than men, the body emerged as central to their self-images. Managing the body through sport and beauty care was perceived by women as a means to correct flaws and attain a desirable body. The female selfgaze may motivate bodywork practices as women assess discrepancies between the real self and the desirable self. Fredrickson and Roberts (1997) suggest that, from an early age, women internalize an observer’s perspective of themselves, which can lead to habitual body monitoring. This, they say, may result, not only in a preoccupation with appearance, but also in negative feelings such as shame and anxiety. The internalization of an objectifying gaze was evident in the comments of female participants as they referred to body parts such as hair-free legs, shaped eyebrows, beautiful nails, smooth, youthful looking skin and slim bodies. Moreover, the great amount of time reported to have been spent on media use, particularly television, may reinforce conceptions of the perfect female body through the exposure to cultural scripts. These images provide a “beauty index” which tells women how they should look (Wolf 2002) and viewers are encouraged to manage their physical appearances as a way to change their lives (Haiken 2000). In addition, gendered representations in media images presenting men in work roles and woman in family settings (Lauzen et al. 2008; Signorielli and Kahlenberg 2001) perpetuate patriarchal narratives. It seems that the sphere of free time is thus a reflection of gender divisions and definitions. The patriarchal view internalized by women who presented themselves as efficient housewives and nurturing mothers, as well as the bodywork practices they reported, mirror traditional gender roles and expectations that perpetuate sexism and the subordination of women.

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Contradictory Free Time Pleasure/Meaningfulness I now address the contradictions that emerged between Chapter 5, which related to the hierarchization of free time, and the findings presented in Chapter 9 on the Meaningful Self. The evaluation of free time was noticeably different when focusing on pleasure or desired pastimes (Chapter 5) than when participants were asked about happiness (Chapter 9). The first highlighted casual and serious leisure (Stebbins 2001), as well as social time, with pleasure and relaxation being indicated as both motives and results of these free time activities. The second was linked to a higher order of significance, or more precisely meaningfulness, as participants referred to what they considered “important.” When relating to happiness (Chapter 9), participants focused on family and giving to others, as well as the “simple things.” Happiness was associated with values and goals, life choices, a sense of self and the greater good, while also being described as an “inner feeling,” and a sense of gratitude. How can we account for these differences? To some extent, this may simply be due to the fact that Chapter 5 related specifically to free time, a more concrete concept than happiness, which was the focus of Chapter 9. While the first brought to mind particular free time activities, questions about happiness promoted reflexivity and philosophical contemplation about meaning. As Lamont and Swidler (2014: 159) suggest, by delving into meanings, the interviewer is able to probe participants’ sense of identity and “what allows them to experience themselves as good, valuable, worthwhile people.” Consequently, I propose that we distinguish between how culture matters for action and how it matters for meaningfulness. Although free time action or practices may be motivated by hedonic desires or a need for relaxation; meaningfulness, may be related to what Charles Taylor (1985) calls “intrinsic purpose” and “significance” (p. 260). Significances, he says, involve “strong evaluation” which he explains as “the recognition of goods which are seen to be intrinsically worthy, that is, goods or ends which are not valued insofar as they are objects of choice or desire, but are rather seen as ends we should seek” (p. 266). In other words, certain free time activities may be positively experienced or desired, yet questions pertaining to happiness or ideals, evoked evaluations of what is significant to the individual, worth seeking and thus generating a sense of purpose.

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In order to achieve meaning, the individual must satisfy a need for purpose in life (Frankl 1959/2006; Baumeister 1991) as well as needs for value and justification, efficacy and self-worth, as discussed in Chapter 9 (Baumeister 1991). Indeed, participants’ ideas of happiness and meaning reflected these needs, which were able to be satisfied via a feeling of freedom. Happiness, in the eudaimonic sense, was perceived as freedom to be true to oneself by choosing “important” values, as well as being free from busyness, thereby allowing a sense of control, and an inner feeling of contentment and gratitude as one reflects on the taken-forgranted in relation to the bigger picture. The positive evaluation of free time, on the other hand, was described as freedom from constraints, routine and pressure, or freedom for pleasure, relaxation and self-realization. Notions of happiness and positive evaluations of free time activities draw on what is culturally valued: values of family and giving, or satisfaction from the simple things in life as well as individualistic notions of freedom and fulfillment. Thus culture matters, but it matters differently for action than for meaningfulness. Perhaps this empirical finding suggests a need for analytic distinction: greater attention should be given to the differences between how culture directs action and the ways in which culture is significant in shaping meaning based on life goals and values. The Time Pressure/Free Time Paradox The study’s findings may also help us understand the time pressure/ free time paradox indicated in past research as discussed in Chapter 2. Much of the literature and surveys on time use in Western countries have indicated that people now have more free time than previous generations, yet experience greater feelings of time pressure, and that the higher one’s income and education, the less free time one has. This is a reversal of the Veblenian leisure–status relationship (Robinson and Godbey 1997; Gershuny 2005). One need only look at headlines such as “In search of lost time: Why is everyone so busy?” (The Economist 2014), “Why only yuppies feel busy” (Weissmann, The Atlantic, 2012), “Stressed, tired and rushed,” (Cain Miller, The New York Times 2015), or “Busy, tired, overwhelmed? You’re not alone” (Weaver, Huffington Post, 2017) to understand that the feeling of time famine is thought to be widespread, particularly among educated, higher income earners. How can this paradox be explained?

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Firstly, given the centrality of freedom as it emerged from participants’ definitions and descriptions of free time, a sense of time pressure may be due, not only to overwork or a lack of free time, but also, and perhaps even more so, to a sense of constrained freedom. This may also help explain the valorization of free time, conceived as an arena of choice and autonomy. Secondly, as we saw, free time is colored by capitalistic discourses promoting productivity, thus individuals may feel a need to be productive, efficient and busy at all times, or to present themselves as such. While the media ostensibly implies busyness as a problem, discourses of productivity promote what I have called, conspicuous busyness (see Chapter 6) (Shir-Wise 2018). The concept is used to refer to the display of busyness as central to one’s selfpresentation of a productive self. The individual may feel inadequate and even ashamed if s/he feels that her/his time is not being utilized efficiently. While passing the time passively, such as watching television, is negatively viewed and stigmatized as idleness, filling one’s time is considered desirable. Thus it is not enough to simply avoid being idle; conspicuous busyness means the performance of productivity as an integral part of one’s self-presentation. Thirdly, I suggest that a sense of “time squeeze” and “harriedness” (Linder 1970; Southerton 2003; Southerton and Tomlinson 2005; Schor 1993) is not simply a result of manifold work duties or domestic tasks. It may also be due to the multiplicity of “free” time, yet work-like activities, that the individual may feel obligated to perform in order to manage the self as well as time. This may create a real “time squeeze” because of the great number of tasks that must be performed in order to attain a desirable self. But the sense of pressure is also due to subjective feelings linked to the never-ending evaluation and revaluation of the self in comparison to cultural ideals, which encourage a self-gaze and promote feelings of inadequacy. However, it is important to note that while participants did initially express a sense of time pressure when differentiating between free time and committed time (Chapter 4), many of the free time practices that they pursued, and descriptions of how these were experienced, suggested otherwise. This may be explained by the study’s emphasis on free time rather than committed time, such as work or domestic duties. But perhaps the way people talk is discursively constructed so that one’s initial response is dictated by discourses that define what is worthy, in this case, busyness. Particularly, when asked questions that prompted deeper contemplation,

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such as those concerning happiness, participants seemed to imply serenity and satisfaction, rather than pressure or discontent with their lifestyles. It seems that reflexivity allows individuals to look deeper into what is generally taken for granted and thus draw from repertoires that give them a sense of meaningfulness. The Isolated Self/The Social Self An additional finding that emerged as surprising was the salience of a Social Self. As discussed in Chapter 8, past research, as well as the media, have painted a picture of an increasingly isolated self, yet the present study suggests otherwise. Leisure research implies the complete privatization of free time, or an isolated self confined to the private domain. Certainly, we saw that many free time practices, particularly everyday activities such as media use, are performed in the home. However, the findings also indicated that the home was a site for family interaction and that a high percentage of participants spent large amounts of time socializing in and out of the home. Moreover, social activities were not only described as enjoyable but also highly valorized by participants. Social time, whether described as quality time with family or as an expression of friendship, was experienced as “time-out.” As such, it is a form of resistance to demanding tasks, including those performed in free time, as well as the pressure associated with them. It is a time when self-esteem is rooted in traditional models, yet the individual is not constrained by onerous duties and roles. On the contrary, social expectations such as reciprocity or cultural dictates related to social engagement, and the resulting burden, were not expressed by participants, who presented social time rather as freedom. This is not to say that the way time is spent in socializing or family interaction is not guided by cultural scripts. For example, participants perceived outings to restaurants or spas as an investment in couple relationships, in keeping with cultural ideals of romance. Yet, as we saw, participants also indicated simply spending time with friends or family as generating a sense of freedom. The familiarity of family and close friendships allows a more relaxed interaction than formal situations when one is conscious of social roles requiring impression management. This does not mean that self-presentation is not taken into account, but rather that interaction with a close samesex friend, for example, may allow a sense of authenticity, as formal barriers are removed. In other words, the comfort and familiarity of the

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microcosm serves to free the individual from the constraints and pressure of the macrocosmic world. It is important to note here, that although much of the literature has pointed to a decline in social connectedness, time use surveys in Western countries all indicate socializing as one of the most (ATUS 2018; Zuzanek 2014). In this respect, the extent of social engagement in the present study was in keeping with time use surveys. Participants in the current research presented socializing as uncommitted, nonjudgmental and uncompetitive, as “fun” but also “important.” I suggest that socializing is an arena of resistance; a realm where individualistic and therapeutic discourses have not taken over when one is not preoccupied with self-surveillance or the pursuit of set goals. In this way, social interaction allows individuals to challenge regimes and feel free.

Frames of Interpretation and Discursive Contradictions The above findings suggest a more complex picture of free time than participants’ definitions implied. It is important to differentiate here between my voice as sociologist and the ways in which participants expressed their understandings and feelings regarding free time. While I have indicated certain contradictions, it is not my intention to imply that participants experienced free time as a site fraught with tension. On the contrary, as we have seen, free time, in contrast to committed time, was described by participants in terms of freedom. Yet, is it possible that a sense of freedom does not necessarily mean that one is free? Could this feeling of choice and free will be culturally constructed much like the need for self-work and control, or for devotion to family? As Bauman (1991) suggests, individuals may feel free when in fact they are dependent on various practices that are embraced willingly. Modernity, he says, is concerned with reducing uncertainty, but the more individuals try to avoid “messiness” so as to achieve order on personal and societal levels, the greater ambivalence there will be (p. 230). The privatization of ambivalence, according to Bauman, means that the “attainment of purpose and meaning is an individual task and personal responsibility,” so that failure is associated with blame and feelings of guilt (p. 197). Perhaps contradictory discourses that offer conflicting cultural scripts for selfhood contribute to a heightened sense of ambivalence. Yet, as we shall see, a diversity of cultural repertoires may also

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enable the individual to move effortlessly from one to another, allowing different forms of individuality. The following thus addresses the multifaceted discursive context in which the complexity of free time and multiple selves are anchored. Freedom and Individualism As we have seen, freedom was found to be central, not only in participants’ definitions of free time but also in their descriptions and evaluations of free time. When experienced as a matter of personal choice, without external constraints, free time practices were considered to be more enjoyable and were more highly valorized. This dominant theme of freedom that emerged throughout the interviews, implies the prepotency of the discourse of individualism (see Chapter 2). Since free time is associated with freedom, it is experienced and evaluated as positive, and conceived as crucial for the self and individual happiness. Although, as we have seen, participants did not draw exclusively on liberal, humanistic discourses, individualism emerged as a dominant worldview that colored the way participants experienced and talked about free time. However, my findings suggest that free time and conceptions of the self, also reflect the “internal contradictions of culture” (Sewell 1999: 53), indicating other discourses that are incorporated into conceptions and actions, at once clashing and blending with individualistic values. These discursive contradictions were apparent in the subjective meanings of participants in relation to free time, their motivations and evaluations, as well as in their conceptions of the self. It has been claimed that in modernity and post-modernity, the lack of moral or cultural guidelines, authoritative sources and traditional frameworks, has led to uncertainty, incoherence and an empty self (Bell 1976; Campbell 1987; Giddens 1991; Bauman 1990; Cushman 1990). While I do not refute this claim of uncertainty, I propose that it is not the absence but rather the multiplicity of guidelines that may pull the individual in different directions, thereby generating confusion, feelings of pressure and a sense of inadequacy or guilt. Yet, as I have said, values of individualism permeate all areas of life, so that actions and thoughts are conceived as a matter of free choice and the individual is envisaged as an active agent whose reflexivity and actions lead to individuality and authenticity. The idea of choice as freedom is deeply embedded in our lives and conceived as being crucial to one’s identity. In this way,

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although discourses may shape how selves should look, and how we should act, they also make us feel that we are free to choose. Capitalism, the Work Ethic and the Therapeutic Ethos Discursive contradictions emerged, not only from participants’ reports of free time practices, but also from their language and self-presentation, that uncovered subtle meanings. Although participants’ definitions of free time focused on freedom, the way they talked about it during the interview also gave expression to capitalistic principles of efficiency, productivity, discipline and a demanding work ethic. Time management and self-discipline were presented as worthy, so that unproductive time was condemned as a “waste of time”5 whereas the optimal utilization of one’s time was considered desirable and a matter of personal responsibility. Tenets of the work ethic, rooted in JudeoChristian principles, that valorize work while denigrating idleness,6 were found to be applied to the self, thus self-management practices were evaluated as a worthy use of free time. Consequently, those who work hard in such regard are extolled and those who do not, are considered idle and lazy. This is also the very basis for the therapeutic culture which presumes that happiness depends on successful self-management (Illouz 2003) and promotes individual responsibility and self-work in order to achieve goals. Yet, participants did not regard capitalistic or therapeutic discourses as compelling forces that may hinder their freedom, as they also drew from the discourse of individualism to make sense of their actions. Since self-management practices are directed toward the self, and not associated with external factors, participants considered them to be an expression of freedom, in keeping with the dual notion as freedom from constraints and freedom to choose to act as one pleases. The self-project, anchored in therapeutic discourse, was thus conceived in individualistic terms of free will, entitlement and agency, yet still guided by capitalistic, utilitarian ideals linking hard work and self-discipline with outcomes. Indeed, what I identified as The Productive Self (Chapter 6), is concerned and occupied with managing the self through practices aimed at physical, intellectual, spiritual or psychological self-improvement, envisaged as a means to worthy selfhood. A failure to perform self-work by pursuing activities, such as sport, was thus experienced by participants as laziness and a lack of self-discipline. So while participants’ definitions of free time

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differentiated between committed time and free time, I have suggested that certain free time practices and our understanding of them, may be shaped by principles rooted in the work ethic resulting in the spillover of work values and productivity into the realm of free time. However, by drawing on the discourse of individualism, self-work was conceived as empowering since it is devoted to the self. Yet, although this may be conceived as freedom, it is a disciplined freedom. Put differently, individualistic notions of self may create a sense of freedom, despite the disciplinary nature of the management of the self as well as time. These findings raise questions regarding the freedom of individuals in the face of capitalistic discourses that promote the optimal utilization of time, productivity and hard work, which includes self-work. While the self-project is rooted in individualism, encouraging personal responsibility, and autonomy as the rationale and instruments for self-cultivation, my findings suggest that this sense of agency, may be mistakably understood as freedom, thereby masking disciplinary discourses that demand compliance to models of worthy selves, so that freedom may be an illusion. Consumer Culture, the Therapeutic Ethos and Hedonism Consumption, promoted by consumer culture as a means of attaining a desired self, was found to be central to the self-project and was also perceived as freedom. However, though the terms self-management, selfcultivation or self-improvement, imply agency and personal responsibility, participants turned to sources and resources of external management, provided by expert services or commodities, suggesting that the individual relies, not on the self, but on others. Consumption is encouraged as a solution for problems and as essential to the self-project. The act of consuming is thus experienced as an obligation to oneself but also as sovereign and autonomous choice (Korczynski and Ott 2006). This sense of agency may also emanate from the feeling of pleasure associated with outings involving consumption, such as malls, restaurants, hotels and spas. The commercialization of free time is rooted in capitalism, yet when the goal is hedonic gratification, as already underscored by Daniel Bell (1976), it contradicts values of the work ethic. Rather than promoting the ideals of productivity and saving, it encourages spending, instant satisfaction and the hedonistic pursuit of pleasure (Bauman 2005; Campbell 1987). By investing time and money toward

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self-gratification, the individual is made to feel autonomous, as s/he is free to indulge in the self. Thus consumption reflects the hedonistic imperative of consumer culture promoting self-indulgence as a means to happiness, drawing, at the same time, on discourses of productivity and the therapeutic ethos of self-management, aimed at achieving results. Accordingly, the pursuit of hedonic pleasures may be experienced as an escape from the demands of the self-project since it is conceived as freedom from obligations to others as well as to the self. Hence, the consumer must keep consuming, whether as a means of achieving a desirable self or as an escape from the self-project. Yet, rather than acknowledging the impact of consumer culture on one’s perceptions and actions, participants tended to perceive consumption as a matter of free choice. Media consumption, too, was described in terms of freedom. However, considering the valorization of productivity and self-management on the one hand, and the hedonic quest for self-gratification and selfindulgence on the other, the apparent mundanity of media consumption presented a conundrum. Watching television, spending free time at the computer or using a cellphone, did not seem to fit values of capitalism and the work ethic, since these activities were generally not linked to productivity. Nor were they in keeping with the therapeutic ethos advocating self-work as a means to self-improvement. Moreover, while practices, such as television viewing, may seem to suit hedonistic discourses as they are pursued for pleasure, media use was not experienced as self-gratification nor was it perceived as a form of self-investment associated with the individual’s worth. On the contrary, most of this time spent was described simply as a habitualized routine in everyday life. The question of motivation was thus somewhat puzzling, particularly given the predominance of these activities and the great amount of time spent on them. Here too, significantly, freedom emerged as a fundamental factor among participants when talking about media practices. Switching on was experienced as switching off. Watching television, in particular, was described, not only as an escape from duties and the stress associated with them, but also as a definitive transition from committed time to free time. In this way, it was conceived as freedom from external forces as well as freedom to relax and devote time to oneself. Perhaps, then, media practices were so dominant precisely because of their unproductive, goal-free nature, thereby serving as an escape from

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everyday obligations and the constant demands of the self-project. In addition, habitualization may act as a mechanism to avoid having to constantly deal with uncertainties (Berger and Luckmann 1966: 71). In other words, it is seen as freeing the individual from external and internal constraints. Yet media practices were also evaluated negatively, even by participants who described them positively. They were perceived as a waste of time, as unworthy in content and quality, considered low culture. These unfavorable evaluations were often linked to values of productivity, contradicting the sense of escape voiced by participants. Whereas the effortlessness of media practices was experienced as relaxing, passivity clashed with the capitalistic work ethic and its demands for goal-oriented action and self-discipline, thus generating feelings of inadequacy and guilt. For some participants, a negative view of media use was indicated as a basis for resistance, which, rather than being passive, was presented as evidence of self-discipline and agency. By uncovering the dominance, experience and evaluation of media practices, the study’s findings confirm the significance of their cultural impact. Since the media provide cultural prescriptions of happiness, worthy selves and lifestyles, it seems that the greater one’s media consumption is, the more likely it would be to influence free time. While participants generally associated media consumption with freedom, I suggest that the exposure to cultural models may increase self-surveillance, self-management and consumption as the consumer constantly assesses discrepancies between ideals and the actual self. In this way, the internalization of media truths, whether regarding correct bodies, notions of happiness, or worthy relationships, may actually constrain freedom rather than promote it. The paradox lies in the experience of media as an escape from the many demands of the self-project, which is in fact promoted and perpetuated, by the very images and messages, contradictory though they may be, that the media convey. Therapeutic Discourse, Familism and Collectivism Similarly, The Family Self appears to be influenced by cultural scripts that offer models of ideal families, parenting and couple relationships. As an extension of the self-project, the individual is called upon to invest in family outings, quality time in the home and in verbal communication. Participants’ perceptions of family time reflected the therapeutic

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principle of assuming responsibility for working toward desired outcomes. Child-centered parenting, for example, was linked to feelings of accomplishment or, to a sense of inadequacy if the individual felt s/he did not measure up to conceptions of worthy parenthood or the perfect family. Internalized notions of desirable relationships and how to manage them, promoted the utilization of free time in order to achieve the goal of an ideal family. Drawing on values of productivity, free time with family was presented as an arena for enhancing relationships; but as opposed to committed time, it was expressed in terms of freedom, even though it was sometimes described as encroaching on individual free time. Among mothers, in particular, self-sacrifice was presented as evidence of intensive mothering, which was perceived as free choice. So while the family demanded effort even in free time, individualistic values of free will and agency may have obscured the cultural and discursive construction of collectively shared conceptions of family time, parental roles and relationships. Yet, family time was also experienced as relaxed, quality time. As mentioned above, the familiarity of the family surrounding was presented as a sphere of authenticity, allowing for the removal of social masks that are donned in more formal interactions. Perhaps, this gives a sense of freedom to act as one desires and be true to oneself. In contrast to other domains that require constant impression management, family, while being other-oriented, may be experienced as a haven. In this way, the individual is at once free from the duties and stress of domestic obligations, as well as being free from the burden of self-work resulting from self-surveillance. This sense of freedom, rooted in individualistic discourses, may, to some extent, account for the high value attached to family time. Whereas much research has indicated the family as a cause of pressure due to constant demands that require efficiency and multitasking (see Chapter 2), the current findings paint a picture of family time as quality time. This may be partly due to the upper-middle class status of the participants whose notions of family and relationships are shaped by therapeutic approaches, as discussed in Chapter 8, “The Family Self.” Moreover, paradoxically, since professional occupations are more demanding, perhaps participants felt they must utilize free time with the family for quality time. As Robinson and Godbey (1997: 34) put it, “telling parents to spend quality time with children really means doing more with them in less time.” This is not to say that participants did not express feelings of time pressure associated with domestic duties.

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However, when relating to free time with the family, they described it as both enjoyable and valuable. Additionally, in the context of an Israeli town like Topaz, the valorization of community and family, as noted earlier, may reflect the influence of collectivist and familist orientations central to Jewish culture. We saw that key local figures indicated a sense of community as did local texts, which also revealed themes of national pride and communal responsibility. Similarly, collective identity and solidarity emerged in participants’ references to the Holocaust or the army, and feelings of communal responsibility were evident in the way participants talked about volunteering and giving. I am not suggesting that community or family are not valued in other cultures. “Intensive mothering,” is a widespread contemporary ideology (Hays 1996) and, in America, for example, family time is also valorized (Fischer 2011; Bianchi et al. 2006). Still, the value of family is strongly pronounced in Israel, where having children is seen as an imperative (Remennick 2000) and families are also relatively large.7 Indeed, the very use of the term quality time, or the word important, when referring to free time with the family or spouses, suggests that it is endowed with value; while the connection to Jewish tradition was underscored by participants’ references to traditional Jewish practices, such as Friday night or holiday dinners with family, as contributing to a sense of togetherness. In this way, besides being experienced as freedom from the pressures of committed time, family time is also perceived as freedom to devote oneself to values. So while individualism and collectivism may be regarded as a contradiction between caring for others as opposed to caring for the self, (McGee 2005), we see here that individualistic and familistic discourses merge rather than clash with each other. This discursive amalgam was evident in social interaction with friends as well as family. Participants talked about friendship and socializing as contributing to both the self and to others. Even volunteering emerged as being dualistically motivated, seen as giving to others, but also making people “feel good” by doing so. While it has been suggested that people avoid using the language of solidarity and collective values, preferring a vocabulary of individualism to describe and explain their communal actions (Bellah et al. 1985; Eliasoph 1997; Wuthnow 2012), the present study found that participants used both,8 when talking about social activities. The connection with others in friendships and socializing was described, like family time, as important but also enjoyable. This was considered a matter of choice as one is free to choose one’s friends and

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shared activities while being free from the obligations and pressure of daily routine, which is experienced as an escape. Socializing in the home was found to be a source of pleasure, rather than being associated with obligation and reciprocation. However, social practices were experienced not only as enjoyable, but also as meaningful. Indeed ideas of happiness and meaning were rooted in collective values of family and community, no less than being based on personal needs for purpose, control and self-worth. Meaningfulness was linked to giving to others, yet participants also indicated everyday, seemingly mundane practices as contributing to a sense of contentment in life. It appears that they derived meaning from action motivated by grand values such as contributing to the greater good, as well as from the simple things, rooted in a modest approach to happiness that stresses gratitude and inner peace. This suggests that individuals are able to resist certain discursively constructed prescriptions that may be experienced as demanding and as an encroachment on their freedom. We have seen that multiple shades of conflicting discourses are projected onto the actor from different directions, casting various hues of color that may clash or blend. At times, the actor may not be aware which shades color her/his thoughts, perceptions and experience, yet at others, it is the variation of tones that may shed light on meaning, enabling inner conversation and resistance.

Conclusions: Is Free Time Really Free? To what extent then, is the individual free in the face of culture, discursive regimes and social structures? As we have seen, even in the realm of free time when we consider ourselves to be free, it seems that culture shapes not only how we think and act but also what we think about and how we evaluate actions. On the one hand, culture may be constraining as it promotes self-surveillance and a “belabored self” that is expected to work hard in order to reach a self that is consistent with cultural expectations (Illouz 2008; McGee 2005). On the other hand, as Swidler (1986, 2001) suggests, culture may be used as a “toolkit” from which actors can select “strategies of actions.” However, as she points out, this does not imply “rational calculation, or a utilitarian model of action,” but rather, that “What people want is a product of the cultural shaping of their capacities for action” (2001: 83). She explains that strategies of action depend on culture, saying,

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Cultural experience shapes the sense of self, the styles and habits of acting, and the larger beliefs about the world that allows individuals and groups to construct and enact particular life strategies. Culture then influences social action because it supports or limits the strategies of action people can pursue.” (p. 83)

Thus, though toolkit theory may imply agency, it still recognizes the possibility of culture as limiting. Indeed, the findings confirm that culture and social structures may be both constraining and enabling (Alexander 2003; Giddens 1984; Hays 1994). Structural and cultural factors, such as class, gender, religion and consumerism, were found to be significant in shaping participants’ free time, conceptions and identities. Yet Sewell’s (1992) view of social structure stresses, “not formally stated prescriptions but the informal and not always conscious schemas, metaphors, or assumptions presupposed by such formal statements” (p. 8). In this way, it is not only action that is affected by structure, but also the way people think, which is shaped by schemas and discourses that are accepted as truth. As we have seen above, prevalent discourses are taken for granted, and constitutive of subjects’ actions. Fine (1992) points out that, “What we accept without thinking is harder to change or question than that which we have consciously learned” (p. 95). In other words, internalized discourses are deeply ingrained, so that they become part of who we are and what we do. This appears to converge with Foucault’s conception of regimes of truth that discipline individuals by defining what is correct. Each society has its régime of truth, its ‘general politics’ of truth: that is, the types of discourse which it accepts and makes function as true; the mechanisms and instances which enable one to distinguish true and false statements, the means by which each is sanctioned; the techniques and procedures accorded value in the acquisition of truth; the status of those who are charged with saying what counts as true. (Foucault 1980: 131)

Discourses construct knowledge and determine how we think and talk about the self and others, thus regulating individuals by encouraging self-monitoring and self-improvement, while, at the same time masking these disciplinary mechanisms.

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Yet, we must differentiate between Foucault’s earlier work, which focused on discipline and coercive practices, and his later claims (1987) that there could be no relations of power “unless subjects are free” and there is a “possibility of resistance” (p. 123). “Technologies of Self,” says Foucault (1988: 18) allow individuals to transform themselves “by their own means or with the help of others” so as to attain a desirable state. However, this does not imply freedom as immunity from cultural and discursive influences. Care for the self, suggests Foucault (1987), requires knowledge of self but also knowledge of “rules of conduct or of principles which are at the same time truths and regulations” (p. 116). Practices, such as sport or beauty care, may be conceived as agency since the individual takes control through self-work, or takes action in the form of the consumption of commodities or the service of experts. However, practices of self, as Foucault claims, are “not something that the individual invents by himself. They are patterns that he finds in his culture, and which are proposed, suggested and imposed on him by his culture, his society and his social group” (p. 122). Indeed, free time practices reported by participants and the way they talked about them, revealed the impact of culture on individuals’ actions, perceptions and conceptions of the self. Self-management practices, although associated with agency, are “proposed, suggested and imposed” on individuals by therapeutic discourse and the work ethic, by consumer culture, and by the discourse of individualism. These discursive regimes promote various practices to achieve a desirable self and thus attain happiness, which, as noted before, has become an imperative and a matter of personal responsibility (Ahmed 2010; Bauman 2003; Rose 1998). In a “makeover culture” a sense of insufficiency is fostered so that individuals feel they must work on the self (McGee 2005). Thus, while individualistic discourses and the therapeutic ethos emphasize autonomy, individuality and authenticity, this does not necessarily imply freedom. Fromm (1942/1984) suggests that true freedom means the realization of the individualistic self. He claims that the individual adopts cultural patterns of self, becoming “exactly as all others are and as they expect him to be,” paying a high price: “the loss of his self” (p. 159). This, he argues, “contradicts one of the most widespread ideas concerning man in our culture,” namely the belief that an individual’s “thoughts, feelings and wishes are ‘his’.” One of the greatest illusions, he says, is that “Most people are convinced that as long as they are not overtly forced to do something by an outside power, their decisions are

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theirs” (p. 171). Free time is thus, an expression of this misconception. On the one hand, it is conceived as a realm of freedom associated with individuality and self-development where one is free to choose. On the other hand, individuality may be jeopardized, as the individual pursues activities that are culturally accepted as worthy, or performs practices that are thought to enable a desirable self, in keeping with a range of diverse culturally prevalent scripts. Although cultural contradictions may lead to feelings of uncertainty, inadequacy and pressure, it may be precisely discursive diversity that also enables actors to make sense of their lives. Participants moved effortlessly from one repertoire to another weaving an intricate fabric made up of different threads of individuality. As Swidler (2001: 31) suggests, “When people talk about their core concerns, they mobilize divergent, sometimes contradictory frames.” It is not that actors have unlimited repertoires from which they can select. On the contrary, justifications and actions can only be chosen within the framework of culture; yet they are still selectively mobilized. So while discourses may hinder freedom, they also allow freedom in that individuals can choose from a range of cultural meanings that help them justify action and contribute to a sense of purpose. It appears then that culture can be “used reflexively, as a ‘tool kit’ to resolve problems and shape the self” (Illouz 2003: 240). In the case of Topaz’s participants, for example, the ideology of intensive parenting, may be constraining as the individual strives to fulfill the role of the ideal parent in keeping with a child-centered approach; but participants were also able to “use” culture to generate a sense of meaningfulness and purpose in life, by drawing on collective, familistic values to justify their choices in relation to family time. Nevertheless, the self and meaning are still culturally constructed since actors can only draw from available repertoires, in this case, a combination of therapeutic scripts, on the one hand, and traditional models on the other. An additional example is the apparent contradiction between the sense of time pressure voiced by participants when relating to work and domestic commitments, which were presented as never-ending and all encompassing, and the tone of contentment that emerged in later chapters when relating to family or happiness. The inner conversations in those chapters revealed a more relaxed, more content self as participants drew from varying cultural resources. This raises the question of when people are committed to the busy self and when not. “The balance between constraint and

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negotiation” suggests Fine (1992), “is important in that it reminds us that the amount of flex in a system is variable…” (p. 94). “Together,” he says, “negotiation and constraint recognize the existence of behavioral possibility, while simultaneously recognizing the reality of institutional power: agency and structure” (p. 95). The question of cooperation versus negotiation may be related to the idea of “inner conversations,” whereby reflexivity contributes to alternative interpretations and, at times, even to resistance. As Margaret Archer (2007: 63), puts it, “The key feature of reflexive inner dialogue is silently to pose questions to ourselves and to answer them, to speculate about ourselves, any aspect of our environment and, above all, about the relationship between them.” Reflexivity takes into account the self but also the social context. Trying to make sense of their actions, individuals draw upon shared “stocks of knowledge” (Schutz and Luckman 1989). As we saw in the chapter on the Meaningful Self, when addressed with the question of happiness, participants were able to explain action and infuse meaning into their lives, by drawing on grand values of family, gratitude and modesty. “But,” as Giddens (1979) points out, “the articulation of accounts as reasons is also influenced by unconscious elements of motivation” (p. 58). The search for meaning may be rooted in unconscious motives such as the need for “ontological security” (Giddens 1991) or for stability, belonging or purpose in life, as well as needs for self-worth and self-actualization (Baumeister 1991; Frankl 2006; Maslow 1943). Hence, the individual is free, in the sense that s/he is able to fulfill psychological and existential needs by taking action or deriving meaning within the constraints of culture. So, as Michel de Certeau (1984) suggests, despite repressive regimes, ordinary people may be able to challenge them. Indeed, while, as we have seen, much of free time is subject to regimes that demand selfsurveillance, hard work and self-discipline, free time can also allow the individual to resist. I do not mean here, resistance in the form of protest or subversive action, but rather, the ability to negotiate the self in the face of powerful forces. I am not suggesting that resistance implies being insusceptible to cultural influences. Nor do I claim that choices are consciously chosen. Resistance is, rather, the expression of a sense of freedom, a matter of meaning attached to action, whether it motivates actors, justifies action or affects the way we evaluate our selves and our actions. Integrating cultural sociological insights from toolkit theory together with those from discourse theory, I propose that resistance is possible

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because of the actor’s capacity to “mobilize contradictory cultural frames” (Swidler 2001: 31) and thus draw on different meanings. At the same time, very close in fact to Foucault’s argument discussed earlier, my findings imply that discourses define what is acceptable and desirable. However, though they may promote self-surveillance and self-work, there is a possibility of resistance. Indeed free time emerged as a site for both cooperation and resistance to regimes, with individuals being able to make sense of their lives by drawing from cultural repertoires, which offer meaningful, if at times conflicting values to motivate and justify action. In other words, culture may be imposing as participants’ free time is subjugated to discursive dictates, yet individuals have a certain degree of freedom insofar as they manage to find meaning by drawing from cultural options. So is free time really free? Time, Freedom and the Self has revealed the complexity and contradictory nature of free time. On the one hand, it emerged as an arena for a productive, managed self, disciplined by discursive dictates of the capitalistic work ethic, consumer culture and the therapeutic ethos. On the other hand, individualistic notions of autonomy and agency shape perceptions of free time, which is experienced as freedom, thereby masking the disciplinary nature of discourses that define what is worthy and what is not. Yet, we have also seen that individuals are able to navigate this complex world of contradictory meaning by drawing from cultural repertoires, which offer a range of meaningful values directing and justifying action. Free time is becoming more and more significant in our lives as it increasingly occupies a greater proportion of our time, a trend which is likely to continue into a future replete with technological advancements. It is thus crucial to encourage reflection about time use, and its relation to conceptions of happiness and worthy selfhood. Perhaps individuals may then be better equipped to resist cultural scripts and thereby enhance their freedom, so that “free” time may become truly free.

Notes 1. I do not include ethnicity as it was not found to indicate different free time use, nor did it emerge in any other way in the interviews. Considering the attention given to ethnic relations and identities both in social research and in the media, this was surprising. 2. According to the Guttman Report (2012), 80% of Jewish Israelis state that they make an effort to be with their family on the Sabbath, 69% say this

332  M. SHIR-WISE about having a special Friday night meal, and 85% state that it is “important” or “very important” to celebrate the Jewish holidays according to tradition. 3. The importance of family and children appears in many sources. For e.g. Genesis 1:28: “be fruitful and multiply.” Psalms 128:2–3: “it shall be well with thee, thy wife shall be a fruitful vine in the innermost part of thy house; thy children like olive plants round about thy table.” 4.  According to the Talmud, the giving of kindness (Gmilut Hasadim) is the basis of the Torah and considered essential to life. Talmud Bavli (Babylonian Talmud), Sotah 14a: “The Torah begins and ends with chesed.” 5. The idea of wasting time appears as early as Seneca who wrote, “It’s not that we have a short time to live, but that we waste a lot of it.” 6.  While the idea of a zealous work ethic tends to be primarily associated with Protestant, and specifically Calvinist influences, as presented in Weber’s influential essay, The Protestant Ethic and the Spirit of Capitalism (1930/1958), the valorization of work and the denigration of idleness have earlier Judeo-Christian origins. Jewish sources say, “Love work” (Ethics of the Fathers, 1:9) while idleness is considered to be not only unproductive, but also degenerative as is evident in the following: “through idleness of the hands the house drops through (Ecclesiastes, 10:18), “The soul of a lazy man desires, and has nothing; But the soul of the diligent shall be made rich” (Proverbs, 13:4). In Christianity, Sloth is one of the seven deadly sins. 7. The fertility rate in Israel (app. 3 children per woman) is the highest in the OECD and Western countries (OECD 2016; The World Bank 2018). 8. Indeed, Lichterman (1995) conceptualizes a personalized form of public commitment, rejecting a see-saw model which assumes that a culture of self-fulfillment is incompatible with public commitment.

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Appendix A: Research Methods

Data was collected using two main methods: questionnaires and semi-structured in-depth interviews. In addition, I participated in local activities as well as examining textual data such as a local magazine and the municipality’s Internet site. Following Denzin (1989), the use of multiple methods, or Triangulation, was intended to enrich the current exploration of free time and thus enhance our understanding of what people do and how they experience and interpret their actions. The different methods reflect the theoretical questions of the study. Procedure and Rationale While the study focuses on a single town, I sought to reach a wide range of participants with varying interests. Using a snowball sampling method, I began with contacts in a singing group, a soccer team, a volunteer organization, a gym class and a synagogue. These participants then gave me the names of friends, neighbors or fellow members of these groups, who had agreed to participate in a sociological study of free time. This gave me access to people with different hobbies; however, the disadvantage of this method is that, since they are drawn from groups that share common pastimes, they may be more likely to have similar interests than if chosen at random. The second possible limitation is that, considering that the central concern of the current research is free time, I wondered if those who agreed to be interviewed were people who had © The Editor(s) (if applicable) and The Author(s), under exclusive license to Springer Nature Switzerland AG 2019 M. Shir-Wise, Time, Freedom and the Self, Leisure Studies in a Global Era, https://doi.org/10.1007/978-3-030-13841-7

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more free time to begin with. This could mean that they were less time pressured and that their experience of free time may be colored by this difference. The meetings consisted of two parts: a closed, written questionnaire which was completed in the presence of the interviewer, followed by a semi-structured, in-depth oral interview. The first was designed to obtain demographic information about the participants as well as quantifiable data about the types and frequency of various activities, whereas the second was intended to delve into questions of meaning. Oral interviews were recorded with the permission of the participant and later transcribed. During the completion of the questionnaire, I took notes about the participant’s responses or comments, however, during the oral part of the interview, which was recorded, I listened without writing. This was hoped to put the participants at ease as I gave him or her my full attention. Only when I left the meeting did I write down my impressions and comments. This included noting how I felt as the interviewer, commenting on the participant’s level of participation and describing the surroundings or interaction with others, in the home or on the phone, during the meeting. The interviews took place between October 2012 and May 2013. Since the summer vacation does not represent everyday time use, by avoiding that time of year I hoped to get a clearer picture of free time as it is used and experienced on a day-to-day basis. However, this may also be a limitation, since people are more likely to spend a greater amount of time out of the home during the summer. In addition, in order to attain an accurate picture of weekday and weekend activities, interviews were conducted on various days of the week so as to incorporate both, since the questionnaire referred to the 48 hours, as well as the month preceding the interview. Following Denzin’s (1989: 13) claim that “no single method can ever completely capture all the relevant features,” besides the questionnaires and oral interviews, I included two other means of exploration. As well as the above mentioned, I examined textual data. The study of local texts with regard to the issues of central concern here—time, freedom and the self—was treated as a way of complementing the interviews and gaining a broader cultural perspective.

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Research Tools Questionnaires The questionnaire was intended as a quantitative tool to attain data related to demographic background and free time activities. This tool borrows certain features from time budget studies and time-use surveys, which focus on types of activities, the amount of time spent doing them and differences between various populations such as men and women. These surveys often rely on closed, stylized questionnaires that list items, or time-use diaries that are kept over a short period of time (Gershuny 2011; Robinson and Godbey 1997). The use of a questionnaire had a number of purposes. Firstly, it was intended to attain quantitative data about the participants’ everyday use of free time. This included what kinds of free time activities are most common among the participants of the study, how long is spent doing them and how often they are done. In addition, the questionnaire relates to the social aspect of free time as it asks participants with whom free time is spent. Secondly, it was designed to encourage frankness about actions. In other words, the participant could complete it without the input of the interviewer, in the hope that this would minimize social desirability and impression management. Thirdly, this tool was intended to promote reflection about free time activities before the oral interview began. Indeed, participants tended to comment either during or after completion. For instance, some noted that they hadn’t realized how much time they spend on certain activities, or how few hobbies they have. Lastly, the questionnaires were designed to attain demographic data about the participants of the study. The first of the five pages in the questionnaire related to demographic information including 16 questions about age, sex, place of birth, occupation, education, number of children, etc. The following pages presented a table with a list of 68 items. Participants were asked to tick which activity had been done in the 48 hours or the month preceding the interview. In addition, they were to estimate the average amount of time spent on the activity in 24 hours as well as noting, on a 1–4 scale, how frequently the activity was performed. Activities were listed according to topics including personal care, media use, hobbies, shopping and outings. Each category included the word “other,” thereby allowing the participant to add activities not listed in the table. Participants were also asked to tick categories indicating with whom activities were done.

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The last page presented 23 closed and open questions referring to television, magazines, computer sites and more. Rather than being meaning-oriented, all questions were of a “matter-of-fact” nature, except for one that related to motives for sport. Questionnaires were in Hebrew except two that were given in English to native English speakers. Unlike most time-use surveys, the participant was also instructed to note the usual frequency of each activity. This was designed to provide a solution to a problem that arose in the pilot interview. It was suggested that certain activities ticked as having been done in the time prior the interview were not representative of how free time was usually spent. For example, the participant said she doesn’t generally watch reality TV but that “by chance” she had done so the previous night. Thus, relating to frequency was hoped to allow for a more accurate picture of the participants’ routine activities, rather than what they just happened to have done in the time before the interview. The questionnaire was given to the participant to complete in the presence of the interviewer and before commencing, I encouraged the participant to ask or comment whenever s/he felt the need, as well as add any additional information that s/he felt would be appropriate. Consequently, many participants asked questions or commented during the process of filling in the questionnaire, while others performed the task independently, without any interaction. Oral Interviews In addition to the quantitative method of questionnaires, I used qualitative research methods since they are appropriate for the uncovering of subjective meanings (Denzin and Lincoln 2011; Merriam 2009) and the exploration of everyday life (Miles and Huberman 1994; Silverman 2010). Whereas the questionnaires focused on what, how much, how often, and with whom, the oral interviews were hoped to gain insight into the perceptions of actors “from the inside” (Miles and Huberman 1994: 6) highlighting why and how, namely questions about experience, motivation, satisfaction or desires related to free time. For example, I asked participants, “How do you feel about the time you spend watching TV? What do you consider free time?” Other questions such as, “What makes you happy?” focused on the self and happiness so as to hopefully gain insight into motivation for free time practices as well as shedding light on cultural ideals. In addition, the participant was asked to comment on commonly heard statements like “I want more time for myself” or “I want

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to start living.” This was intended to evoke reactions to others’ conceptions of time as well as encourage reflexivity. Also, since I was concerned that participants may feel a need to present themselves as happy, or as being efficient in time management, these questions were hoped to make them feel more comfortable about expressing dissatisfaction or a sense of time pressure. Lastly, in order to further trigger conceptions of worth, I asked a number of hypothetical questions as well as questions relating to special occasions, for example, “What do you wish you could do if you had more free time?” “If money weren’t an issue, what would you do with your time that you don’t do now?” “How do you spend your time on a special day, such as a birthday or anniversary?” These questions were designed to encourage participants to imagine time when one does not feel restricted by external constraints and shed light on perceptions of ideal, desirable time. By using a semi-structured in-depth interview, participants were encouraged to express themselves while still being guided with questions. This was intended to yield subjective responses about the individual’s experiences, perceptions and attitudes (Patton 2002) relating to free time. In addition, it was hoped that this would illuminate the quantitative findings, by allowing a deeper insight as to the perceived value of various pastimes and why people choose certain activities over others. Lastly, in-depth interviews also allow for flexibility, and enable the researcher to incorporate unplanned questions that are guided by the topics that arise in the process of the interview. Besides integrating emergent questions during the interview, the questions of the interviews were changed in order, as well as in content, over the course of the interviews. Following Corbin and Strauss (1990), data collection and analysis were interrelated processes. In this way, the data itself indicated relevant issues that could be incorporated in the following interviews. Moreover, after each meeting, I reflected upon the participant’s response to the questions I had asked, noting possible additions and changes for the following interviews. Yet this does not mean that there is no basic outline for the interview. Based on theoretical considerations as discussed in Chapter 2, the questions revolved around three main issues: firstly, how the participant describes, defines, experiences and evaluates free time; secondly, how happiness and the ideal self are perceived by the individual; and, lastly, the meanings attached to various types of free time. As the above examples suggest, some questions were asked in a direct manner, while others were more subtle.

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Textual Data The examination of textual data included statistical data from the Israeli Central Bureau of Statistics and survey findings provided by key figures and senior officials, which provided useful information about the field of study. I also explored the municipality Internet site as well as fliers and brochures that advertised free time activities or cultural events. In addition, I examined the contents of a local magazine that almost all participants reported reading, the purpose being to illuminate sources of discursive knowledge, which may reflect and prescribe what is considered worthy. The Sample I conducted interviews with 43 adults, including 5 key figures, described below, the number being determined by the objective of saturation (Small 2009). In other words, as Small suggests, I could only know the final number of interviews to be conducted, when I attained saturation. Indeed, the question of sample size is one of the challenges of qualitative research, thus I followed procedures for grounded theory presented by Strauss and Corbin (1998), continuing interviews until I felt that nothing significantly new was emerging. Participants were selected according to certain criteria. Firstly, all were married with children living at home. This criterion was aimed at minimizing variations in time use and lifestyle due to differences in family status. Indeed research suggests that having children changes how time is used and experienced (Craig and Mullan 2010; Offer and Schneider 2008) and that the presence of children affects both the quantity and quality of free time (Bittman and Wajcman 2000). Secondly, the participants were middle to upper-middle class. Following Swidler (2001), I was interested in people who may be presumed to share a relatively common culture, thus I interviewed residents of an upper-middle class town in the center of Israel. My main consideration for focusing on participants from one town, was my preference for depth over breath or, to use Wolcott’s (2001) camera analogy, I wished to use a zoom lens in order to capture details rather than a panoramic view (Patton 2002; Wolcott 2001: 128; Yin 2009). The choice of an upper-middle class sample was to reduce the likely effects of either a very high or very low socio-economic status. In other words, the former may have a much wider choice of leisure options

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due to greater economic resources, or alternatively, the latter may have limited access to certain free time practices because of the lack thereof. On the other hand, this does not mean that their lifestyles and subjective perceptions of free time are not affected by sociocultural constructs that prescribe what is desirable. Furthermore, while the middle classes, particularly the upper-middle class, may be less constrained by economic factors, they are likely to have higher levels of education and be employed in professional occupations that are more demanding, thus allowing them less free time (Gershuny 2005; Katz et al. 2000; Offer and Schneider 2011; Robinson and Godbey 1997). The participants consisted of both women and men (see ‘Appendix B: Selected Demographic Characteristics of Sample’). The ages of the participants ranged from 32 to 63, with the majority being in their 40s, an age group hitherto fairly neglected in academic research in general, and family and time studies in particular. The main area of research concerning middle age to date has been health related. The educational level of participants was found to be high with 78.3% having academic degrees with more than half of these having a second degree or more. The economic status was also homogeneous with 78.4% describing themselves as upper-middle class, as does the Central Bureau of Statistics (CBS 2015) in its report on the town. In addition, the 19 homes of participants where interviews were conducted, suggested an upper-middle class standard of living as 14 were private houses and only 5 were apartments. Ten of the 14 houses were particularly spacious and meticulously designed, conveying a sense of affluence. All participants were married and had children living at home, a dominant characteristic (77%) of households in the town at the time of the study. The average number of children living at home was 3 and the average age was 14. It was my intention to focus on older couples with older children since much research has been done on parents of younger children. In addition, babies and toddlers are physically demanding, thus parents’ free time may be more constrained. In other respects, the sample was heterogeneous. Firstly, the level of religiosity among the participants varied, with an almost equal division between irreligious, traditional and modern religious.1 Secondly, the participants’ work circumstances varied with 63.2% working full time, 21% working part time and 15.8% not working as paid work.2 The professions included a wide range of areas such as computer technology, education, business, law, security and health (see ‘Appendix B: Selected

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Demographic Characteristics of Sample’). Finally, while most were born in Israel, their ethnic backgrounds were varied. A number were at turning points regarding their work, such as a 46-year-old unemployed lawyer who was soon to open her own practice at home. One participant was a 43-year-old naval officer about to retire, while another was a 48-year-old mother of five, who was now working after having spent many years at home. In addition, a 41-yearold woman had stopped working a short time before the interview took place, describing herself as having been a “workaholic” in her previous place of employment. Another participant, a 50-year-old mother, who had been accustomed to a comfortable lifestyle, was now going through a difficult period of bankruptcy. The fact that these participants were in transitional, unsettled points in their lives, meant that they were reflective about the past and future as well as the present, which may thus make “culture more visible” (Swidler 2001: 89). In addition to the above-mentioned participants, I interviewed five major figures who hold different positions in the town. These included the mayor, the Rabbi, the managing-director of the cultural center, the manager of the country club and the coordinator of religious cultural events. These interviews were hoped to shed light on the setting of the study, namely the town in which the participants live.

Notes 1. Unlike the division in the general Jewish Israeli population. According to the Pew Report (2016), 40% of Jewish Israelis identify themselves as secular (Hiloni), 23% as traditional (Masorti), 10% as religious (Dati) and 8% as ultra-orthodox (Haredi). 2. I refer, here, to participants fulfilling tasks such as domestic duties and childcare. I still consider these to be work, even though homemakers, both men and women, are not paid for this kind of work.

Appendix B: Selected Demographic Characteristics of Sample

Women: 57.9% Men: 42.1% Av. age: 46.45 Av. no. of children: 3–4 (3.6) Av. no. of children living at home: 3.1 Av. age of children: 14.8 Education: 86.4% have university degrees (37.8%—first degree, 48.6%—second degree and above) Religiosity: irreligious 32%, traditional 32%, modern religious 35% Work load: 21% part time (2 men), 63.2% full time (10 men/14 women), 15.8% homemakers or unemployed Self defined economic status: 78.4% upper-middle class, 10.8% lower- mid, 8.1% upper class, 2.7% lower class Place of birth: 83.8% born in Israel, others in Europe, South America, Australia Ethnic origin (based on parents’ place of birth): 44.7% Ashkenazi (European/ American) background, 34.2% Sephardi (Africa, Asia, Mid-East), 13.2% mixed, 7.9% both parents Israeli born (21.1% mixed origin of parents or both Israeli born)

Occupations academic lecturer CEO business CEO (hi-tech company) © The Editor(s) (if applicable) and The Author(s), under exclusive license to Springer Nature Switzerland AG 2019 M. Shir-Wise, Time, Freedom and the Self, Leisure Studies in a Global Era, https://doi.org/10.1007/978-3-030-13841-7

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348  Appendix B: Selected Demographic Characteristics of Sample computer programmer defense ministry educational counselor education-managerial position engineer in electricity company homemakers-3 interior designer, maths tutor lawyer lawyer (unemployed) navy officer nurse physiotherapist product manager in dental company project manager, computer technology project manager and consultant, computer technology psychologist (head) psychologist (educational) retired project manager, computer technology sales manager secretary secretary (works from home) security (head) in town small business owner (doors) small business owner (import) small business owner (office supplies) speech therapist teachers-3 technical manager theater, acting and marketing travel agent veterinarian key figures: cultural coordinator of religious events manager of the country club managing-director of the cultural center Chief Rabbi of town

Index

A achievement, 65, 113, 114, 162, 242, 245, 282, 283, 285, 287, 291, 295, 304, 309 action movies, 184 active decision-making, 115, 180 activeness, 29, 30, 32, 86, 98, 110, 112, 115, 119–121, 135, 170, 180, 194, 197, 205, 206, 214, 219, 221, 229, 235, 246, 251, 256, 266–268, 286, 296, 319 freedom from, 30, 296 active time, 86, 120, 121, 135, 137, 246, 251, 266 activity, 2–4, 6, 7, 9, 10, 13, 14, 21, 31, 33, 37, 53–59, 61–68, 71, 74, 78, 81–83, 85, 87–90, 92, 93, 95, 97–101, 103–107, 110–129, 134, 138, 140–146, 150, 151, 153, 157, 161–166, 169, 170, 172, 175, 176, 179–183, 188–192, 196, 197, 200, 211–213, 219, 221–224, 226, 227, 229, 231–233, 242, 243, 249, 253, 255–271, 277,

279, 280, 285–287, 289, 290, 295, 296, 302–305, 307, 308, 311, 314–317, 320, 322, 325, 329, 339–344 addiction computer use and, 198, 211 consumption and, 166 self-discipline and, 209, 212, 213 television and, 190, 206, 212 to cellphones, 204, 212 advertisements, 20, 64, 65, 67, 170, 171, 177, 178, 304 advice columns, 65 “Advice to a Young Tradesman” (Franklin), 23 age, 14, 16, 54, 64, 146, 147, 149, 211, 235, 243, 259, 282, 313, 341, 345, 347 agency cultural and discursive constructs around, 2, 14, 324, 328 effort and, 24, 112, 135, 324 free time and, 2, 14, 29, 31, 38, 39, 85–87, 92, 135, 149, 150, 157, 163, 177, 212, 251, 267, 271,

© The Editor(s) (if applicable) and The Author(s), under exclusive license to Springer Nature Switzerland AG 2019 M. Shir-Wise, Time, Freedom and the Self, Leisure Studies in a Global Era, https://doi.org/10.1007/978-3-030-13841-7

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350  Index 301, 302, 305, 312, 320, 321, 324, 328, 331 friendship and, 257, 267, 270 lack of, 191, 197, 213 myth of, 27, 177 pleasure and, 163, 166, 177, 190, 257, 321 reflexivity and, 149, 298, 330 self-presentation and, 38, 212, 312 social comparison and, 140, 209 temporally embedded nature of, 150 Alexander, Jeffrey C., 28, 327 alone time freedom and, 87–91, 106, 135, 174, 223, 226, 258, 313 listening to music and, 90, 106, 303 pleasure and, 91, 115, 118, 254, 258 relaxation and, 88, 91, 106, 110 serenity and, 88 Alone Together (Turkle), 21 alternative media technology, 180 altruism, 281, 285, 296 ambivalence, 213, 265, 306, 318 American Declaration of Independence, 24 American Dream, 24, 56, 155, 308 amusement, 10, 12 anxiety cellphones and, 201 consumption and, 20, 67, 168, 176, 177 time pressure and, 176, 177 Archer, Margaret S., 149, 330 Aristotle, 9, 10, 25 eudaimonia, 25, 295, 296 Ashkenazi ethnic background, 63 assiduity, 144 Auschwitz concentration camp, 297 authenticity, 10, 14, 19, 26, 186, 188, 195, 236, 250, 296, 306, 309, 317, 319, 324, 328

commodified, 19 autonomy autonomous satisfaction, 92, 136, 292, 321 compromising, 81 control and, 27, 80, 85, 87, 135, 155, 304 happiness and, 24, 26, 290 autotelic enjoyment, 112, 114, 279 desire to pursue, 122 Azaryahu, Maoz, 34 B Bauman, Zygmunt, 17–19, 26, 29, 155, 156, 176, 318, 319, 321, 328 on consumerist syndrome, 176 Baumeister, Roy F., 18, 25, 271, 272, 295, 297, 315, 330 beach vacations, 108 beauty care, 99, 146, 147, 156, 162, 163, 313, 328 consumption of, 162 Beck, U., 38, 39 Beck-Gernsheim, E., 18 Bell, Daniel, 11, 19, 24, 319, 321 belongingness, 250, 271 Benjamin, Walter, 173 Bentham, Jeremy, 24, 295 bereavement, 287 Berlin, Isaiah, 26 Bible, 65, 68, 114 Big Brother (television show), 186, 187, 207 birthdays, 173, 209, 227, 229, 237, 238 bodily contact, 222, 241 body image, 143 bodywork as self-investment, 146 consumption and, 178

Index

gender and, 313 practices, 146, 156, 178, 313 self-project and, 143, 148 bonding, 26, 223, 230, 231, 235, 239, 251, 260, 263, 303 Bourdieu, Pierre, 28, 213, 251, 253 Bowling Alone (Putnam), 21 business, 23, 34, 35, 62, 76, 86, 135, 139, 266, 345, 347, 348 busyness conspicuous busyness, 7, 38, 40, 154, 316 constant feeling of, 83 contemporary life associated with, 133 freedom from, 91, 182, 306 free time and, 5, 7, 15, 24, 38, 73, 81, 83, 86, 88, 91, 120, 123, 133, 153, 157, 307, 309, 315, 316 C cafes, 54, 67, 101, 102, 121, 172, 173, 261, 262, 307 calmness, 86, 223 control and, 86 Calvanism, 11 Campbell, Colin, 19, 20, 178, 319, 321 capitalism consumer capitalism, 19, 26, 34 free time and, 19, 20, 24, 26, 134, 154, 305, 316, 320–322, 331 individualism and, 17, 34, 305 “time is money” and, 23 Weber on, 23, 24 carefreeness, 270 catharsis, 188, 214 CBS. See Central Bureau of Statistics (CBS)

  351

cellphones addiction to, 203, 204, 211 anxiety and, 201 attachment to, 204 control and, 75, 202–204, 211 efficiency and, 201 family time and, 232, 247 habituation of, 202, 204 increase in use of, 179, 199 meals and, 130, 210, 232, 246 practicality of, 199, 202 social interactions and, 199, 204, 212 stress and, 203, 306 switching off and, 201 talking to others on, 75, 199, 204, 232, 239 wasting time and, 179, 203, 212, 213, 306 Central Bureau of Statistics (CBS), 54, 56, 103, 345 Certeau, Michel de, 14, 330 chess, 57, 114, 115, 196 childcare demanding nature of, 80, 230 freedom from, 10, 14, 73, 81, 83, 109, 220, 309, 311, 313 ongoing demands of, 80 physical and mental burden of, 82 unequal division of, 247, 311 children achievements of, 245, 282, 283, 287, 290 activities for, 56–58, 61, 64, 67, 82, 110, 138, 194, 200, 211, 220, 222, 223, 226, 227, 241, 243, 248, 252, 258, 263, 304, 309, 341 birthdays of, 237 freedom from demands of, 223, 250

352  Index free time and, 3, 23, 32, 56, 57, 61, 76, 77, 82, 100, 101, 103, 116, 118, 124, 138, 181, 220, 222, 226, 229, 230, 237, 241, 243, 245–247, 249, 256, 280, 303, 309, 310, 324, 344, 345 happiness and, 23, 282, 283, 290, 310, 311 individual attention for, 241, 242 in Jewish culture, 54, 236, 310, 311, 325 meaningfulness and, 233, 234, 278, 279, 282, 284, 285, 288, 291, 292, 295–298, 310, 314, 315, 317, 326, 329 mother-child connection, 200, 241 older, 32, 103, 226, 227, 233, 245, 292, 345 parent-child interaction, 240 quality time with, 110, 225, 227, 234, 239, 241, 242, 280, 324 shopping for, 23, 32, 54, 169 stress and, 211, 226, 240, 241, 243, 249 television and, 105, 142, 181, 186, 188, 205, 231, 246, 248 time pressure and, 100, 220, 249, 252, 264 underprivileged, 286 verbal interaction and, 232, 241 working long hours and, 76, 77, 144, 304 young, 76, 82, 105, 124, 139, 142, 211, 222–226, 232, 242, 244, 245, 258, 282, 293, 345 choice consumption and, 20, 176, 177, 196, 228, 321, 322 forced choices, 30 freedom to choose, 85, 87, 88, 91, 92, 128, 133, 135, 150, 177, 243, 257, 266, 290, 319

free time and, 1, 2, 5, 14, 15, 18, 20, 27, 33, 39, 72–74, 77, 84, 85, 87, 88, 90–92, 117, 123, 125, 133, 135, 141, 161, 163, 228, 243, 251, 286, 295, 302, 305, 308, 309, 319 hyperchoice, 20 pleasure and, 3, 18, 20, 59, 71, 91, 111, 112, 115, 146, 163, 177, 196, 243, 257, 258, 265, 266, 286, 295, 305 restriction of, 123 self-actualization and, 92 self-discipline and, 141, 157, 213, 330 television and, 115, 189, 196, 231, 305 Christianity, 10 Cinderella stories, 29, 186 civic engagement, 54 cleaning, 3, 8, 79, 138 clear head, 124 coaching, 20, 149, 151, 152, 162, 163, 171, 286 coffee, 118, 121, 172, 192, 196, 197, 222, 223, 245, 257, 265, 279, 286, 289 collective effervescence, 271 collective identity, 186, 286, 325 collectivist cultures, 33, 34, 324, 325, 329 college education, 12 Collins, Randall, 221, 271 comedy shows, 185 commensality, 230, 232, 233, 261 commercialization love and, 64, 108, 229 of free time, 7, 64, 161, 321 of leisure, 19, 174, 309 committed time, 5, 13, 72, 91, 100, 101, 106, 118, 181–183, 212, 220, 222, 242, 243, 250, 306, 316, 318, 321, 322, 324, 325

Index

freedom from, 13, 106, 182, 183, 250, 325 common good, 288 communication dedication allotted to, 266 Facebook and, 103, 193, 199, 267, 268 face-to-face, 240, 253, 266, 268 quality time and, 239, 240, 251, 266, 323 See also talking, verbal interaction companionship, 223, 257 company of others, 101, 102, 116, 167, 254, 259, 270, 271 competence, 92, 140, 271, 281 computer use addiction and, 198 family time and, 101 for viewing television, 95 in contrast to television viewing, 214 increase in, 266 instrumental, 191, 211 pleasure and, 196, 211 time-consuming element of, 197 wasting time and, 196, 198 consecutive time, 84, 140 conspicuous busyness, 6, 38, 154 conspicuous consumption, 11, 38, 60 leisure and, 154 consumer culture disciplined freedom and, 177, 305, 321 hedonistic imperative of, 322 self-gaze and, 177, 253 consumerist syndrome, 176 Consuming Self, 152, 161, 178 consumption, 19–20 addiction and, 166 anxiety and, 20, 67, 176, 177 bodywork and, 178, 305 choice and, 168, 170, 178, 243, 251

  353

constant, 20, 165, 177, 281, 323 desirable self and, 19, 328 free time and, 7, 16, 20, 163 goal-oriented, 176 happiness and, 20 imagined, 7, 20, 22, 174 leisure, shared consumption of, 173 of beauty care, 162 of culture, 13, 175, 213, 328 pleasure and, 176 print media and, 170 rational consumption, 166 self-management and, 175, 323 shared experience of, 271 special occasions and, 173, 228, 243, 248 television and, 34, 171, 180, 206 See also media consumption contemplation, 9–11, 122, 186, 314, 316 contemporary life, 3, 5, 9, 133, 179, 254 control, 85 autonomy and, 87, 135, 155 calmness, 86 cellphones and, 75, 201 free time and, 16, 74, 77, 86, 134, 315, 319 individual freedom and, 85, 86 self-presentation of being in, 205, 209 shopping and, 166, 169 See also self-control cooking, 81, 87, 98, 113, 115, 138, 185, 234, 264, 265, 279, 293 Cooper, Al, 21 creative hobbies, 126 credit cards, 11 crocheting, 138 Cronin, Anne M., 17, 155 Csikszentmihalyi, Mihalyi, 25, 114–116, 127, 128, 297

354  Index The Cultural Contradictions of Capitalism (Bell), 24 culture, 9, 13, 16, 18, 19, 27, 28 as form of investment, 62, 306 collectivist cultures, 33–35, 38, 307, 325 consumption of, 13, 19, 22, 34, 161, 175, 177, 178, 213, 252, 306, 322, 328 cultural sociologists, 28 disciplined freedom and, 6, 134, 157, 177, 331 distinctions between high and low, 213 Jewish culture, 33, 34, 38, 249, 307, 310, 325 makeover culture, 156, 328 of middle classes, 35, 36, 344 of upper-middle classes, 35, 36, 344 role of, 175, 302 See also consumer culture D daily routine, 73, 82, 95, 124, 180, 192, 209, 211, 220, 247, 326 media consumption part of, 211 daimon, 296 Davies, Bronwyn, 30 Davis, Wayne, 279 day-to-day life ordinary routine of, 124 pressure in, 73, 74, 93, 109, 110, 304 stress of, 73, 106, 109, 214, 219 Decentering Leisure (Rojek), 14 Deci, Edward L., 25, 127, 271, 272, 295, 307 decision-making, 13, 115, 168, 180, 214 active decision-making, 115, 180 freedom from, 214

deep engagement, 114, 123 De Grazia, Sebastian, 9, 10 democracy, 17, 24, 33 Democracy in America (Tocqueville), 17 demographic characteristics of sample, 347 desirable self consumption and, 162, 163, 168, 175, 177, 178, 322 free time and, 141, 156, 306, 329 sport and, 143, 145 desired self, 134, 141, 151, 153, 321 adherence to models of, 157, 321 construction of, 151 dieting, 163, 178 disciplinary discourses, 38, 157, 321 disciplinary power, 29 disciplined freedom consumer culture and, 177 culture and, 6, 134, 155, 157, 177 manifestations of, 157 dissatisfaction, 20, 22, 77, 87, 123, 140, 249, 343 distractions, 62, 125, 266 division of labor, 15, 302 doctor, waiting at, 138, 202 documentaries, 185 domestic conflicts, 248 domestic duties all-consuming nature of, 80 freedom from, 73, 105, 123, 153, 182, 214, 250, 304 free time and, 73, 80, 87, 105, 106, 123, 214, 244, 247, 250, 304, 316, 325 pressures linked to, 243 work and, 73, 76, 105, 123, 214 dreams, 18, 22, 24, 56, 123, 128, 155, 174, 178, 282, 308 Dunning, Eric, 250, 269, 270 Durkheim, Emile, 27, 271

Index

E ease, 125, 181, 340 economic constraints, 122, 308 education college education, 12 parenting and, 232, 252 reading and, 65, 98 upper-middle classes and, 54, 309, 345 volunteering and, 54, 65, 103 efficiency cellphones and, 201 inefficacy, 140 productivity and, 4, 5, 134, 136, 139, 141, 155, 167, 213, 305, 316, 320 self-presentation and, 139, 141, 316, 320 time management and, 23, 134, 136, 137, 141, 154, 343 effort, 3, 18, 24, 57, 58, 81, 86, 111–115, 122, 123, 129, 135, 144–146, 148, 172, 176, 181, 182, 188, 200, 214, 221, 224, 225, 227, 228, 232, 233, 238, 240, 242, 250, 255, 265, 271, 277, 283, 292, 324 agency and, 24, 112, 135, 324 pleasure and, 113–115, 182, 221, 265 effortlessness, 182, 323 electronic devices, 107, 179, 239 Elias, Norbert, 13, 250, 269, 270 Elliott, Anthony, 15, 20, 21, 26 embarrassment, 186, 191, 213 Emirbayer, Mustafa, 31, 149, 150 emotional barriers, 270 emotional comfort, 253, 306 emotional freedom, 74, 270 emotional strain, 79, 211, 306 empty self, 18, 25, 319

  355

energy, 61, 79, 82–84, 113, 124, 136, 145, 181, 221, 224, 238, 252, 254, 271, 277, 287, 309 enrichment classes, 103, 261, 304 entertaining guests, 238, 264 entitlement, 11, 24, 29, 35, 60, 92, 150, 155, 156, 305, 309, 320 “The Ethic of Care for the Self as a Practice of Freedom” (Foucault), 30 ethnic distinctions, 63 eudaimonia, 296 exercise classes, 145, 150, 162, 175, 259 exhaustion, 82 exhibitionism, 197 F Facebook articles sent by, 193 communication and, 103, 193, 267 described negatively, 196 influence of, 194 self-gaze and, 198 virtual interactions on, 195 face-work, 269 family as sanctum, 253 bonding, 235, 252, 303 connection with Whatsapp, 239 extended, 220, 233, 235, 236, 238, 283, 291, 303 family outings, 234, 323 free time, 1, 7, 12, 16, 65, 68, 79, 83, 87, 101, 118, 174, 220, 230, 243, 248, 284, 303, 306, 308, 310, 311, 313, 317, 318, 324, 325 gender roles and, 8, 249, 311, 313 happiness and, 64, 128, 178, 281, 284, 297, 308, 315, 326

356  Index ideal, 56, 66, 248, 251, 277, 293, 294, 317 intimacy of, 238, 250, 251 meals, 231, 233, 246, 249 meaningfulness and, 233, 297, 329 nature trips with, 235 nuclear, 235, 283 self-presentation and, 212 self-realization and, 128, 307, 309, 312 values, 35, 65, 67, 130, 248, 282, 293, 297, 304, 311, 315, 326, 330 family self self-project and, 252 family time cellphones and, 130, 232, 247 computer use and, 101 free time and, 7, 118, 230, 249– 251, 324 in private domain, 220, 234, 235, 307 quality time and, 239, 252, 317 sharing everyday activities, 248 television and, 303 value of, 118 violation of, 232 fantasies, 104, 122, 123, 128 fatigue, 82, 123, 124, 225, 226, 228 feminist perspective, 249, 311 Fine, Gary Alan, 31, 330 fitness, 147, 162 flow activities, 115, 122, 124, 126 social interactions and, 115 focal practices, 271 forced choices, 30 forums, 194 Foucault, Michel, 25, 27, 29, 30, 156, 215, 327, 328 Frankl, Viktor, 25, 297, 315, 330 Franklin, Benjamin, 17, 23 Fredrickson, Barbara L., 313

freedom, 15, 37, 66, 71–73, 88, 92, 251, 279, 290 alone time and, 89 for non-activity, 9 for realization of desirable selves, 128 for relaxation, 105 free time and, 87 from activeness, 296 from busyness, 182, 296 from childcare, 220, 311 from committed time, 250, 306 from constraints, 90, 127, 315, 320 from decision making, 214 from demands of children, 223 from domestic duties, 220, 313 from electronic devices, 107 from external constraints, 37, 89, 129 from obligation, 88, 89, 105, 322 from stress, 74 from work, 72, 78 meaningfulness and, 233 pleasure and, 111, 118 shopping and, 164 social engagement and, 270 spiritual welfare and, 88 to choose, 91, 320 to feel gratefulness, 288 to pursue self-realization, 127 free time, 9, 10, 13, 15, 16, 19, 306–312 agency and, 85 as site where self is constructed, 134 busyness and, 81, 83 capitalism and, 134 characteristics of, 88 children and, 56, 77, 101, 103, 116, 118, 220, 236 choice and, 85, 128 commercialization of, 161 conceptualizing, 301, 302

Index

consumption and, 34, 170 control and, 135 definitions of, 87–89 desirable self and, 306 desire for more, 128 domestic duties and, 87 efficient utilization of, 120 family, 230 family time and, 220, 230, 249 favorite free time activities, 116 fragmented, 84, 128 freedom from and, 74 friendship and, 251 happiness and, 295, 298 hierarchization of, 37, 104, 116, 126, 304, 314 imagined, 7, 126 individualism and, 72, 156, 219 in Israeli context, 10 inner peace and, 126 leisure and, 19, 71 liberalism and, 72 meanings of, 71 media consumption and, 178, 214 multitasking and, 266 nature of free time for different classes, 14 notions of self and, 16, 17 perceived worth of, 104 personal time and, 84 positively valued, 135 Productive Self and, 142 quality of, 83 scarcity of, 15 self-management and, 68 self-transformation and, 148 social groups and, 256 sophistication and, 61 subjective experience of, 16 television and, 89, 180 time management and, 86 time pressure and, 81, 82

  357

trends and, 60 valorization of, 253 women and, 73, 101 worthy, 250 free will, 29 French Revolution, 17 friendship, 8, 21 agency and, 251 entertaining guests, 264, 265 free time and, 251 going out, 260, 261 happiness and, 128 intimate, 270 pleasure and, 254 quality time and, 252 quality time with same sex friends, 253, 260 same-sex, 120 social interaction with same sex friends, 256, 257 See also social interactions Fromm, Erich, 26, 37, 72, 91, 93, 304, 328 fun, 57, 62, 83, 89, 255 G Geertz, Clifford, 27, 64, 298 gender bodywork and, 313 division of labor, 302 equality, 248, 311 family and gender roles, 247, 249 inequality, 247–249, 252, 312 public domain gendered division with private domain, 294 roles, 249, 293, 294 Giddens, Anthony, 13, 18, 28, 148, 155, 156, 297, 319, 327, 330 giving generosity, 296 helping others, 284

358  Index meaningfulness and, 277, 295 satisfaction and, 282 value of, 284, 287 goals, 119, 134, 136 Godbey, Geoffrey, 11, 14–16, 22, 33, 58, 91, 98, 146, 249, 309, 315, 324, 341, 345 Goffman, Erving, 64, 269, 271 going out, 221, 224–226, 228 friendship, 260, 261 social interactions and, 261 good life, 10 grandparents, 236, 237 gratefulness, 288 freedom to feel, 288 meaningfulness and, 288 gratification, 278 Grey’s Anatomy (television show), 207 grooming activities, 146 guilt, 76, 142, 151, 225, 232 media consumption and, 213 television and, 188 H habitual practices, 95 hanaah, 278 happiness, 128, 278, 280, 284, 285, 288 autonomy and, 290 children and, 282 consumption and, 171, 281 cultural scripts of, 177 family and, 277–281, 284 free time and, 280, 295 goal-oriented approach to, 291 hedonic, 25 meaningfulness and, 277, 278 notions of self and, 279 pleasure and, 277, 302 quality time and, 279 relationships and, 272

social interactions and, 254, 255, 258 harriedness, 292 Hays, Sharon, 28–30, 249, 252, 312 health, 98, 143 Internet and research on, 193 sport and, 112 hedonic happiness, 25 helping others, 277 hierarchization of free time, 7, 37, 104, 116, 126, 304 hobbies, 127 Hochschild, Arlie, 15, 20, 26, 128, 249, 252 holidays, 170, 174 Holocaust, 34, 287 home, 119, 120 home cinema systems, 96 Homeland (television show), 186 home ownership, 243 hotels, 228 hyperactivity, 155 Hyperchoice, 20 I identification, 214 idleness, 9, 154, 213, 316 Illouz, Eva, 19, 25, 26, 28, 29, 36, 64, 92, 173, 250–252, 298, 309, 320, 326, 329 illusion of freedom, 134 imaginable actions, 31 imagined future possibilities, 128 impression management, 147, 269 inactivity, 145 inadequacy, 151, 154, 162 income, 58 Independence Day, 56 individual freedom, 19, 85, 93 individualism, 200, 204, 230, 251, 293, 301

Index

agency and, 37 capitalism and, 17 free time and, 72, 86, 306 individualistic notions of self, 321 individualistic values, 155 middle classes and, 308 neoliberal individualism, 24 notions and self and, 35, 277 self-project and, 157, 321 self-realization and, 307 therapeutic ethos and, 309, 328, 329 upper-middle classes and, 308 Individualization (Beck and BeckGernsheim), 18 individualization, 18 individual responsibility, 24, 140, 148, 320 industrial revolution, 11 industriousness, 25, 134 informal interaction, 270 informality, 233 inner peace, 126 instrumental rationalism, 152 intellectual development, 112 reality shows and, 185 Internet, 21, 178 health research and, 193 shopping on, 163 social interactions and, 258 social ties and, 103 uses of, 196 vacations and, 206 virtual interactions, 195 interruptions, 125 intimacy, 100, 251 intrinsic desires, 135 investigative programs, 185 investing culture as form of investment, 62 in relationships, 225 in self-project, 214

  359

time, effort or money, 111 See also self-investment irreligious populations, 62, 304 isolation, 17, 101, 303 technology and, 108 Israel free time in Israeli context, 10 Israeli suburban towns, 54 middle class life in, 32 religious and irreligious populations in, 62 stress of everyday life in, 109 tension of living in, 310 Western culture and, 38 women in, 311 Israeli Central Bureau of Statistics, 344 J jealousy, 140 Jerusalem Day, 64 Jewish culture, 38, 249, 325 children in, 310 joint activities, 227 Judeo-Christian ideology, 154 K Kalberg, Stephen, 154, 250 Kasser, Tim, 92, 177 Katz, Elihu, 35 keeping up with the Joneses, 60 Kern, Roger M., 213 Kiddush, 234 kinship, 236 Kitayama, Shinobu, 33 knowledge, 192–194 L labor gender division of labor, 302

360  Index leisure and, 302 The Labor of Leisure (Rojek), 14 Lamont, Michelle, 28, 36, 314 laziness, 145, 156, 162, 320 Lebanon War, 287 lehaspik, 138 leisure as time for self-development, 57 casual, 13, 122, 126, 212 commercialization of, 309 commercialized, 19, 174 conspicuous consumption and, 11 cultural implications of, 35 extension pattern of, 12 free time and, 10 labor and, 302 lower classes and, 62 Neulinger on, 92 neutrality pattern of, 12 of children, 57 oppositional pattern of, 12 Pieper on, 9, 92 Rojek on, 13–15 romance and, 250 serious, 13, 82, 122, 303, 314 shared consumption of, 173 television and, 126, 269 upper classes and, 62 work and, 12, 74, 134, 153 Leisure-The Basis of Culture (Pieper), 9 Lenatzel, 136, 139 letaktek, 137 liberalism entitlement and, 35 free time and, 72 neoliberal individualism, 24 life transitions, 148 Linder, Staffan Burenstam, 11, 15, 316 listening to music, 90, 98, 120, 129, 192, 196 pleasure and, 279 popularity of, 98

locality, 56 local knowledge, 64 local magazines, 65 loneliness, 21, 268 love, 22, 25, 83, 167, 187, 229, 271 lower classes, 308 Lukes, Steven, 17 M makeover culture, 156, 328 malls, 19, 32, 104, 107, 169, 170, 172, 243, 248, 321 managed self, 141, 331 Man’s Search for Meaning (Frankl), 297 Markus, Hazel R., 33 Maslow, Abraham Harold, 25, 92, 214, 250, 271, 330 Maspik, 136 massage, 19, 110, 173, 176, 228, 229, 279 mass media, 22, 36 Masterchef (television show), 190, 207 McGee, Micki, 18, 20, 25, 64, 155, 156, 177, 313, 325, 326, 328 meals, 34, 232, 233, 236, 281 Sabbath, 234 meaningfulness Baumeister on, 25, 295, 297 children and, 233, 282 culturally defined aspects of, 293 family and, 285, 315 giving and, 310 gratefulness and, 288 happiness and, 25, 278 meaningful interaction, 241, 266 pleasure and, 118, 234, 279, 282, 297, 326 Taylor on, 298 volunteering and, 285 meaningful self, 253, 272, 277, 282, 287, 288, 292, 295, 307

Index

media consumption contradictory experience of, 212 free time and, 178, 179, 214, 323 guilt and, 213 mundane nature of, 212 notions of self and, 92 part of daily routine, 7, 211 productivity and, 142, 322 relaxation and, 106 stigmatized, 179 technology and, 21, 96, 179, 199 television and, 21, 89, 96, 106, 138, 170, 179, 180, 212–214, 313, 322 media time, 96, 214, 215 as switching off, 214, 322 presented as negative, 142 meditation, 113, 149, 287 Mehubarim (television show), 188 Melucci, Alberto, 13, 22 mental freedom, 88, 109 metuktak, 137 middle-aged individuals, 147 middle classes culture of, 35, 36 individualism and, 35, 311 in Israel, 35 time pressure as distinctive mark of, 58 women in, 252 Mill, John Stuart, 24 Miller, Leslie, 29, 30 Mische, Ann, 31, 149, 150 Mizrahi ethnic background, 63 Mobile Lives (Elliott and Urry), 21 modernity, 3, 318, 319 late modernity, 18 monastic life, 10 money, 3, 23, 24, 59, 60, 104, 123, 125, 126, 128, 138, 146, 155,

  361

165–167, 170–175, 228, 250, 287, 292, 304, 306, 321 special occasions and, 173, 228, 343 moral good, 297 motherhood, 80, 244, 245, 248, 249, 252, 282, 312 goal oriented, 245 intensive, 249 internalized scripts of, 248 social comparison and, 244 movies, 56, 96, 97, 103, 115, 116, 121, 171–173, 186, 190, 196, 227, 228, 243, 248, 254, 261, 262, 279 action movies, 184 special occasions and, 227, 243, 248 multitasking free time and, 138, 247, 266 Productive Self and, 139 television and, 138 women and, 139 mundane activity, 220 municipal events, 61 N nature, 23, 54, 65, 68, 102, 105, 107, 108, 110, 117, 119, 121, 126, 127, 129, 171, 229, 235, 262, 263, 279, 288, 305 family nature trips, 235 passive viewing of, 121 tranquility and, 121 negative freedom, 26 neoliberal individualism, 24 Neulinger, John, 92 news, 65, 96, 109, 179, 185, 190, 192, 209 nituk, 108 non-activity, 9 nonobligatory time, 141 nuclear family, 235, 283

362  Index O obligation, 24, 72, 73, 75, 78–80, 84, 87, 91, 92, 111, 153, 157, 161, 164, 182, 230, 250, 253, 265, 266, 269, 270, 304, 313, 321, 323, 324, 326 freedom from, 72, 88, 312, 322 nonobligatory time, 141 personal responsibility and, 157 spouses and, 230 time pressure and, 84, 91, 157, 182 work obligations, 203 occupations of sample, 345 Oprah Winfrey Show, 64 optimal self, 139, 151 optimization of time, 137 oral interviews, 32, 95, 104, 163, 179, 191, 254, 269, 303, 340–342 Ortner, Sherry, 28, 30 osher, 278 outings, 7, 8, 101, 102, 104, 116, 117, 121, 163–165, 172, 175, 179, 212, 219, 220, 224–227, 234, 236, 241, 243, 248, 253, 255, 261–263, 279, 303, 317, 321, 341 overseas travel, 60, 124, 174 overworked lifestyle, 154 Oyserman, Daphna, 33, 35 P pain, 24, 144, 193 pampering, 174, 176, 229, 280 parenting achieving the goals of, 245 active, 246 child-centered, 240, 243, 251, 324 education and, 252 goals of, 245, 297 parent-child interaction, 240 self-sacrifice of, 243

Parker, Stanley R., 12, 14, 100, 101, 134, 297 Parsons, Talcott, 27 passivity, 181, 189–191, 197, 205, 206, 212, 214, 323 pastimes favorite, 55, 104, 105, 116–118, 126, 130, 172, 254, 256, 303, 307 reading as favorite, 118 recreational, 10 self-realization and, 122–124 social interactions and, 116, 118, 256, 258 value of, 129, 343 with set goals, 110 perfect body, sociocultural ideals of, 146 personal care, 71, 91, 99, 146, 156, 341 personal failure, 140, 155 personal growth, 25, 67, 127, 151 personal interests, 65, 123, 187, 290 personal responsibility, 24, 141, 143, 157, 162, 305, 318, 320, 321, 328 obligation and, 157 productivity and, 143, 321 personal time, 75, 84, 87, 90, 118, 242, 251 free time and, 87, 118 Peterson, Richard A., 213 philosophy life philosophies, 279 pleasure and, 113 phone apps, 1 photo albums, 114 physical appearance, 143, 313 physical fitness, 162 physical strain, 78 piano, 106, 149 picnics, 234, 262

Index

Pieper, Joseph, 9, 10, 107 Plato, 9, 10 The Playing Self (Melucci), 22 pleasure advertisements and, 67 agency and, 163, 166, 257, 321 alone time and, 115 business and, 86 choice and, 5, 18, 20, 71, 91, 177, 196, 243, 266, 286 computer use and, 196 consumption and, 166, 168, 173, 175–177, 305, 306, 321 effort and, 115, 265 freedom for, 315 freedom to, 110, 127 friendship and, 258, 264 happiness and, 6, 8, 20, 272 hedonic, 24, 68, 278, 289, 306, 322 listening to music and, 279 meaningfulness and, 118 mutual focus of attention enhancing, 221 philosophy and, 113 self-management and, 68, 305 self-oriented, 68, 115, 288 serious leisure and, 314 shopping and, 163, 164, 166 siblings and, 236, 237 small pleasures, 115 social interactions and, 98, 108, 254, 255, 258, 259, 264, 265, 272, 307 sport and, 59, 98, 111, 115, 127, 143, 145, 146, 258, 279, 303 television and, 105, 115, 117, 183, 188, 190, 211, 279, 322 vacations and, 136, 193, 305 volunteering and, 286 popular culture, 91 positive freedom, 26, 27, 93

  363

positive state of mind, 88 post-modernity, 319 practicality, 167 presents, 3, 6, 7, 54, 66, 129, 238 print media, 170 private domain, 76, 78, 80, 96, 219–221, 227 family time in, 234 feelings of pressure linked to, 106 outings, 234 public domain gendered division with, 294 privatization, 317 production, 11 Productive Self cultural scripts of, 140 free time and, 142 multitasking and, 139 self-presentation and, 316 therapeutic self and, 148 productivist syndrome, 176 productivity efficiency and, 4, 5, 133, 134, 136, 139, 141, 155 idleness and, 155 maximal, 157 media consumption and, 306, 322 merit of, 139 personal responsibility and, 143 productive outcomes, 137 pronounced need for, 4 self-discipline and, 142 self-presentation and, 139, 316 television and, 142, 182, 213 time management and, 4, 134 The Protestant Ethic and the Spirit of Capitalism (weber), 11, 154 Protestantism, 11 Protestant work ethic, 23, 24 psychic mediators, 151 psychological well-being, 121 public domain, 119

364  Index private domain gendered division with, 294 public events, 61 Purim parade, 56 Putnam, Robert, 15, 21 puzzles, 113 Q quality time as compensatory mechanism, 249 characteristics of, 239 communication and, 239, 240 family time and, 249, 252 friendship and, 252 happiness and, 279 quantity and, 344 with children, 110, 225, 227 with same sex friends, 253 questionnaires, 341, 342 queues, 137 quiet time, 120 R rational consumption, 166 reading as favorite pastime, 303 education and, 98 philosophy, 113 popularity of, 98 reality shows appeal of, 207 Big Brother (television show), 186, 207 criticism of, 208 intellectual development and, 185 recreation activities, 13, 16 pastimes, 10 shopping as, 167, 172 reflexivity

agency and, 148, 149 catalyst for, 148 coaching and, 149 self-cultivation and, 153 self-improvement and, 148 self-project and, 148 self-transformation and, 149 relationships enhancing, 324 happiness and, 323 investing in, 178 symbols of love and, 229 relaxation alone time and, 106 clear head and, 124 effortlessness and, 182 freedom for, 315 massage and, 279 media consumption and, 106 nature and, 105, 121 practices associated with, 219 relaxed pace, 120 Shabbat and, 107, 234 television and, 105, 182, 188, 189 uninterrupted, 105 weekends and, 106 religious populations, 62, 304 repertoire theory, 30 research methods demographic characteristics of sample, 347 occupations of sample, 347 oral interviews, 342 procedure and rationale, 339 questionnaires, 342 sample, 344 textual data, 344 restaurants romance and, 173 social interactions and, 261 special occasions and, 172, 173, 227, 243

Index

retirement, 77, 122, 287 Roberts, Kenneth, 11–16 Roberts, Tomi-Ann, 313 Rojek, Chris, 12, 14, 15, 20, 24, 71, 96 on leisure, 12–14 on private domain, 71 romance leisure and, 173, 250 restaurants and, 173, 228, 317 television providing unrealistic model for, 208 weekend getaways and, 173 Rose, Nikolas, 18, 22, 24–26, 155, 328 Rousseau, Jean-Jacques, 17, 92 Russell, Ruth V., 9, 10 Ryan, Richard M., 25, 127, 271, 272, 295, 307 S Sabbath, 234, 281 Sabbath meals, 234, 281 satisfaction autonomous, 290, 322 giving and, 282, 285, 315 self-realization and, 315 simple things in life and, 289 work and, 22, 77, 86, 316 saving time, 3, 138 scarcity, 5, 302 School of Music (television show), 186 Schor, Juliet, 11, 15, 16, 36, 60, 154, 316 Schudson, Michael, 28–30 Schwartz, Barry, 20, 176 sedulity, 147 self, notions of empty self, 18 free time and, 18 free time as site where self is constructed, 134

  365

happiness and, 279 individualism and, 16, 321 individualistic, 321 media consumption and, 21 optimal self, 139, 151 perceived self, 140 time management and, 134 self-actualization, 25 choice and, 92 self-concept, 35, 282 self-control, 23, 24, 134, 191, 197, 205, 206 lack of, 189, 191, 197 self-presentation and, 205 self-cultivation, 35, 141, 157, 162, 219, 305 self-development, 18, 71, 112, 128, 304, 329 leisure as time for, 57 serious leisure, 122 self-directed activities, 126 self-discipline absence of, 197 addiction and, 166, 209 choice and, 141, 157, 213 lack of, 142, 151, 162, 320 productivity and, 7, 155, 323 sport and, 144, 145, 147, 151, 156, 320 television and, 142, 205 time management and, 320 work ethic and, 323 self-efficacy, 25, 271, 282, 283, 297 self-empowerment, 146, 164, 178 self-esteem, 14, 127, 140, 271, 317 social worth and, 271 self-examination, 148, 186 self-expression, 19, 88, 122 commodified, 20 serious leisure and, 122 self-fulfillment, 18, 22, 26, 34, 88, 258, 286, 312

366  Index self-gaze, 141, 143, 145, 156, 157, 190, 253, 269, 313, 316 consumer culture and, 177 Facebook and, 198 self-gratification, 177, 322 self-help books, 29 self-image, 198, 313 self-improvement advertisements related to, 67 reflexivity and, 148 self-management and, 148, 162, 305 self-indulgence, 146, 163, 164, 176, 280, 306, 322 self-investment, 129, 146, 164, 322 bodywork as, 146 self-management consumption and, 323 free time and, 1, 7, 36, 145 pleasure and, 1, 68, 111, 115 practices, 7, 36, 145, 153, 156, 320, 328 self-improvement and, 36, 148, 162, 176, 305 self-realization and, 269 self-transformation and, 148 sport and, 111, 162, 163, 307 self-mastery, 27, 145 self-presentation agency and, 212, 312 family and, 212, 317 of being in control, 209 Productive Self and, 139 productivity and efficiency and, 141 self-control and, 205 social comparison and, 269 self-project bodywork and, 148 centrality of, 150 compulsory, 155 demands of, 39, 322, 323 family self and, 252

individualism and, 157 investing in, 151 reflexivity and, 148 self-realization activities linked to, 124 family and, 293, 312, 315 freedom to pursue, 122 individualism and, 17 pastimes and, 123 satisfaction and, 136 self-management and, 148, 269 self-reliance, 17, 311 self-sacrifice, 244, 245, 307, 310, 324 self-surveillance, 25–27, 156, 198, 318, 323, 324, 326, 330, 331 self-transformation free time and, 151 reflexivity and, 149 self-management and, 148 self-work, 7, 18, 22, 25, 26, 65, 67, 118, 143, 144, 152, 155, 157, 162, 177, 219, 250, 269, 304, 306, 309, 318, 320–322, 324, 328, 331 activities associated with, 162 self-worth, 139, 211, 241, 253, 264, 271, 285, 290, 291, 297, 326, 330 external feedback and, 291 Seneca, 10 serenity, 88, 108, 120, 317 Sewell, William H., Jr., 319, 327 Shabbat, 63, 107, 234, 236, 247, 249, 310 relaxation and, 107, 234 shopping as joint activity, 223 as recreation, 166, 167, 172 control and, 169 dislike for, 167 for children, 23, 32, 54, 169, 303, 341

Index

freedom from and, 164 on Internet, 23, 170 pleasure and, 163–165 stereotypes about women and, 165 time pressure and, 164 siblings, 101, 236, 237, 283 siesta, 34 significance, 12, 22, 36, 108, 114, 239, 254, 279, 295, 297, 298, 314, 323 Simmel, Georg, 17, 270, 271 simple things in life, 288, 296, 307, 315 satisfaction and, 289, 315 skill, 13, 82, 114, 122, 126, 168, 251 soccer, 83, 260, 339 sociable engagements, 269 social activities solidarity and, 325 talking and, 258, 325 television and, 269 value attached to, 269 women and group social activities, 258 social comparison agency and, 140, 209 motherhood and, 244 self-presentation and, 209, 269 social connectedness, 318 social constructionism, 30 social control, 25, 27 social engagement, 219, 254, 263, 269–272, 307, 317, 318 freedom to and, 270 social expectations, 59, 169, 317 social groups, 255, 256, 268 social interactions avoidance of, 271 cellphones and, 199 entertaining guests, 264 events for, 262 exercise classes and, 259

  367

flow activities and, 115 going out and, 261 happiness and, 255, 272 impression management and, 269, 306 Internet and, 269 pastimes and, 116, 118, 256, 258, 271 pleasure and, 68, 108, 219, 255, 259, 272 popularity of, 98 quality of, 115 restaurants and, 102, 116, 262 sport and, 98, 258, 260, 307 television and, 205 time pressure and, 254 tradition and, 263 with same sex friends, 256 women and, 103, 259, 261, 306 social media, 22, 211 social networks, 194, 210 social practices, 253, 309, 326 social pressure, 60, 174 social relations, 265 social self, 219, 253, 317 social structures, 15, 28, 29, 53, 301, 304, 308, 327 social ties, 21, 103 social time, 101, 118, 120, 220, 253, 254, 269, 271, 303, 314, 317 inherent need for, 118 social worth, 271 sociocultural ideals of perfect body, 146 solidarity social activities and, 325 togetherness and, 310 women and, 257 sophistication, 61 spas, 173, 178, 227–229, 306, 317, 321

368  Index special occasions, 8, 172, 227–229, 237 birthdays, 173, 227, 237 spiritual enrichment, 112 spiritual guides, 149 spiritual welfare, 88 sport, 1, 10, 13, 16, 32, 54, 56, 58–61, 64, 65, 67, 111 desirable self and, 143, 145 goal-oriented approach to, 143, 144 health and, 98, 112, 143, 258 hobbies and, 98, 126 irreligious populations and, 304 physical and psychological effects of, 111 physical appearance and, 143 pleasure and, 67, 98, 111 popularity of, 98 religious populations and, 304 self-discipline and, 144, 145 self-management and, 111, 144 social interactions and, 98, 103, 260, 307 trends and, 61 value of, 143 women and, 111, 145 See also recreation spouses companionship between, 223 going out together, 224 obligation and, 230 special occasions and, 248 talking, 220, 227 time with, 100, 172, 174, 220–222, 227, 229 Stebbins, Robert A., 12–14, 82, 122, 126, 212, 297, 303, 314 stereotypes, 165 stress cellphones and, 203 children and, 124, 211, 226, 241, 243, 249, 325 freedom from, 74

of day-to-day life, 73, 74, 109, 188, 219 of everyday life in Israel, 109 work and, 105, 312 structural factors, 14, 308 sublimation, 154 Sudoku puzzles, 113 summer vacations, 60, 206, 340 support groups, 194 Swidler, Anne, 28–30, 36, 148, 249, 298, 309, 314, 326, 329, 331, 344, 346 swimming, 57, 60, 118, 175 switching off, 108 cellphones and, 201 media time as, 214 T talking, 23, 82, 85, 101, 108, 115, 117, 170, 182, 206, 220, 222, 224, 227, 234, 237, 242, 246, 249, 256, 258, 262, 263, 266, 267, 303, 322, 325 on phone, 23, 267 social activities and, 258 spouses, 220 weekends and, 227 Talk of Love (Swidler), 36 Talmud, 151 Taylor, Charles, 298, 314 Technologies of the self, 156 technology advancement of, 20 alternative media technology, 180 constant obligation to work and, 75 escape from, 107 isolation and, 108 media consumption and, 21, 96, 179 multitasking and, 137 Tel Aviv, 2, 54 television, 96, 142

Index

addiction and, 191 appeal of, 181, 182, 184 as source of information, 185 Big Brother (television show), 207 casual leisure and, 13, 126, 212 children and, 105, 142, 181, 186, 188, 205, 207, 230 choice and, 115, 205, 305 computer use for viewing, 95 computer use in contrast to, 214 considered wasting time, 142, 246 consumption and, 138, 171, 180, 205 conversational aspect of, 231 family time and, 248, 303 free time and, 1, 13, 21, 89, 96, 108, 138, 180, 181, 183, 191, 192, 222, 230, 303 Grey’s Anatomy (television show), 207 guilt and, 191 Homeland (television show), 186 leisure and, 212 low quality of, 182 Masterchef (television show), 185, 190, 207 media consumption and, 21, 89, 180, 212 Mehubarim (television show), 188 mixed feelings on, 188 multitasking and, 137, 138 pleasure and, 115, 117, 126, 183, 190, 213, 305 popularity of, 96 productivity and, 142, 182, 316 providing unrealistic model for romance, 208 relaxation and, 105, 117, 181, 183, 190, 305 resistance to, 205, 211 School of Music (television show), 186

  369

self-discipline and, 142, 205 social activities and, 268 social interactions and, 205, 269 The Voice (television show), 185, 186, 190 unproductive characteristic of, 213 See also reality shows textual data, 32, 53, 339, 340, 344 Theory of the Leisure Class (Veblen), 11 therapeutic ethos, 25, 26, 134, 148, 155, 277, 305, 320–322, 328, 331 individualism and, 320 work ethic and, 134, 155, 277, 305, 320–322, 331 therapeutic self, 148 therapy, 26, 67, 150 advertisements for, 67 therapeutic industries, 18 Thompson, Edward P., 11 time famine, 15, 91, 292, 315 “time is money,”, 23 time management competence and, 140 efficiency and, 134 free time and, 86, 134, 136 notions of self and, 134 obsession with, 11 productivity and, 3, 136 self-discipline and, 7, 144 time paucity, 58 time pressure anxiety and, 176 as distinctive mark of middle class life, 58 as obstacle to personal time, 84 children and, 100, 138 constrained freedom and, 91, 316 contemporary life associated with, 133 feelings related to, 119

370  Index free time and, 16, 23, 39, 58, 82, 84, 91, 122, 133, 153, 157, 163, 181, 316 negative effects of, 137 obligation and, 84 reducing, 125 shopping and, 164, 173 social interactions and, 264 weekends and, 106 time-saving machines, 3 time squeeze, 15, 157, 316 time use studies, 11, 16, 179, 211 Tocqueville, Alexis de, 17, 301 togetherness, 231, 235, 236, 239, 250, 257, 263, 280, 325 commensality and, 261 solidarity and, 310 tolerance, 63 toolkit theory, 31, 327, 330 tourism, 13, 16 tradition, 18, 24, 28, 33, 34, 234, 309, 325 tranquility, 56, 88, 120, 281, 290 nature and, 121 travel beach vacations, 108 exotic destinations, 65, 66 overseas, 124, 174 vacations, 60, 124 trends, 5, 61, 331 trivial activities, 130 Turkle, Sherry, 21–23 Tu’Bishvat, 56 U unfilled time, 136, 137 upper classes, 10, 17, 61, 347 upper-middle classes culture of, 344 distinctive features of, 58 education, 54 individualism and, 35

lifestyle of, 344 standard of living of, 36, 54 urban living, 56 nature and, 108 Urry, John, 13, 20, 21 utilitarian principles, 134 utilization of time, 23, 136, 137, 141, 213, 227, 252, 277, 306 V vacations Internet and, 193 pleasure and, 108, 128, 279, 305 summer, 60, 206, 340 Veblen, Thorstein, 11, 12, 38, 60, 154 verbal interaction, 222, 231, 232, 240, 241 children and, 232, 241 meals and, 232 virtual interactions, 195 virtual socializing, 103, 267 virtuous action, 10 The Voice (television show), 185, 186, 190 volunteering, 8, 66, 103, 137, 284–287, 296, 307, 311, 325 activeness of, 137, 286 education and, 54, 103 voyeurism, 188, 197 W Wajcman, Judy, 15, 16, 22, 128, 154, 157, 344 walking, 1, 54, 82, 105, 162, 167, 170, 223, 224, 258, 305 wasting time computer use and, 198 on cellphones, 179 passivity and, 189 television considered, 197, 213

Index

Waterman, Alan S., 25, 295, 296, 307 wealth, accumulation of, 11 Weber, Max, 11, 19, 23, 154, 155 on capitalism, 19, 23 wedding anniversaries, 173 weekends getaways, 173 meals on, 232, 233 outings on, 172, 236 relaxation and, 107 talking and, 227 well-being, 25, 88, 112, 125, 128, 143, 211, 258, 292 Western culture, 9, 16, 33, 155 Israel and, 38 Whatsapp, 23, 199, 200, 240 family connection with, 239 Winfrey, Oprah, 29, 64 women, 10, 32, 59 age and, 313 conceptions of womanhood, 293 free time and, 103, 145, 267 group social activities and, 258 in Israel, 311 middle class, 252 mother-child connection, 200, 241 multitasking and, 139 notion of the ideal woman, 294 question of career or family, 66 social interactions and, 103, 258, 261 solidarity and, 257, 260 sport and, 59, 98, 111, 259, 313 stereotypes about shopping and, 165 See also gender work, 72–73, 75, 85, 106 change and, 149 described as all-consuming, 80 domestic duties and, 73, 76, 105, 123, 153, 214

  371

freedom from, 9, 37, 72, 77, 78, 153, 304 guilt and encroachment of, 76 leisure and, 12, 74, 134, 153 long hours, 16, 34, 137, 144, 149, 201, 301, 304 overworked lifestyle, 154 psychological involvement in, 79 routinized, 13 satisfaction and, 86, 291 stress and, 78, 109, 203, 309 technology, constant obligation to work and, 75 temporal invasion of, 75 working hours, 11, 16, 39, 59, 75, 77, 154, 309 work obligations, 203 See also self-work work ethic discourse of, 134 perception of time and, 141 Protestant, 23 self-discipline and, 323 therapeutic ethos and, 155, 277, 305, 320, 331 values of, 155, 321, 322 working classes, 11, 301 worthy time use, 252, 280 writing, 340 Y Yemima method, 53 Yishuv, 54, 308 Yom Kippur prayers, 63 young children, 211, 222, 224, 232 Youtube, 196 Z Zionism, 33