Therapy from the Quran and the Hadith 0500887341, 0503417156, 0044208539, 9786035000994

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O you who believe! Ask not about things which, if made plain to you, may cause you trouble. But ifyou ask about them while the Qur'an is being revealed, they will be made plain to you. Allah has forgiven that, and Allah is Oft-Forgiving, Most Forbearing. (Sr al Maida, 101)

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Interpretation: The disapproval of unnecessary questioning. The Companions in their enthusiasm (ra) would often ask the Prophet Muhammad (saw) questions unnecessarily, whilst other hypocrites and disbeliever would ask Him (saw) questions simply to mock. The Prophet Muhammad (saw) warned of the dangers of doing this, since the answer may have serious implications. And how can you have patience about a thing which you know not? (Sr al Kahf 68) Interpretation: Extract from the story of the journey of Al-Khidr and Prophet Moses (as), where Prophet Moses (as) was in quest of knowledge and felt there was more with no ore knowledge than him, until Allah (swt) led Him to al-Khidr. The ayah refers to the request of Prophet Moses to join al-Khidr on the journey, but al-Khidr reminds him (as) that he possess knowledge and a responsibility from Allah (swt) in which Prophet Moses (as) has no share. As the account unfolds, it is clear the Prophet Moses is being taught a lesson of patience. Ahadith Narrated Abu Huraira (ra): Allah s Messenger (saw) said: Satan comes to one ofyou and says, ‘Who created so and so, who created so and so? Till he says, ‘ Who has created your Lord?9 So, when he inspires such a question, one should seek refuge with Allah and give up such thoughts. (Bukhari, B54, C8, HI385) Theme: The characteristics of Iblis (Satan) and his soldiers

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Narrated Anas (ra): The Prophet (saw)delivered a khutba (religious talk) the like of which we had never heard before. He said, ' Ifyou knew but what I know then you would have laughed little and

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ther individual may enable (an alternative route) to the attainment »f inner peace. Avah And (remember) Dhun-Nun [Yunus (Jonah)], when he went offin anger, and imagined that We shall not punish him (i.e. the calamities which had befallen him)! But he cried through the darkness (saying): ‘La ilaha ilia Anta [none has the right to be worshipped but You (O Allah)], Glorified (and Exalted) are You [above all that (evil) they associate with You] ! Truly, I have been of the wrongdoers.9 (Sr al Anbiya, 87) Interpretation: The Story of Jonah and the Whale and how Jonah left his people in anger and was swallowed by the Whale. Upon finding himself in this difficulty, he (as) prayed to Allah (swt) to release him and admitted his wrong. /46>

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Narrated Anas (bin Malik) (ra): while we were sitting with the Prophet (saw) in the mosque, a man came riding on a camel. He made his camel kneel down in the mosque, tied its foreleg then said: ‘Who amongst you is Muhammad?9 At that time the Prophet (saw)was sitting amongst us (his companions) leaning on his arm. We replied: ‘This white man reclining on his arm.9 The man then addressed him: ‘O son ofAbdul Muttalib,9 The Prophet (saw) said: ‘I am here to answer your questions.9 The man said to the Prophet (saw): ‘I want to ask you something and will be hard in questioning. So do not get angry.9 The Prophet (saw)said: ‘Ask whatever you want9 The man said: T ask you by your Lord and the Lord of those who were before you, has Allah sent you as a Messenger to all the Mankind?'The Prophet (saw)replied: ‘By Allah, yes. 'The manfurther said: T ask you by Allah. Has Allah ordered you to offer five salat (prayers) in a day and night (24 hours).'He replied: ‘By Allah yes. ' The man further said: 7 ask you by Allah! Has Allah ordered you to observe Saum (fasts) during this month of the year (i.e. Ramadan)? He replied: ‘By Allah, yes. ' The man further asked: 7 ask you by Allah. Has Allah ordered you to take Zakat from our rich people ind distribute it amongst our poor people?1 The Prophet replied: By Allah, yes. ' Thereupon that man said: 7 believe in all that with which you have been sent, and I have been sent by my people as a messenger, and I am Dimam bin Tha 'laba from the brothers of Bani Sa'ad bin Bakr. ‘(Bukhari, B3, C4, H60). Theme: To recite or read (something) and present it in front of a scholar. Narrated (Ibn Abi Mulaika): Whenever A isha (ra) (the wife of the Prophet - saw) heard anything which she did not understand, she used to ask again until she understood it completely. (Aisha said) Once the Prophet (saw) said: ‘Whoever will be called to account (about his deeds on the Day of Resurrection) will surely be punished/1 said: ‘Doesn't Allah say: “He will surely receive an easy reckoning. (Qur'an, 84,8). The Prophet (saw) replied: ‘This means

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the Messenger (saw) and the believers call for help. Being clear about ‘bad behaviour’

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Whilst it is psychologically beneficial to have good assumptions about others, it is equally important for patients to recognise and identify negative behaviours, especially in the case of immoral and unethical behaviours, if only to safeguard oneself from harm.

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Avaat The hypocrites, men and women, are one from another; they enjoin (on the people) Al-Munkar (i.e. disbelief and polytheism ofall kinds and all that Islam has forbidden), andforbid (people) from AlMa 'ruf (i.e. Islamic Monotheism and all that Islam orders one to do), and they close their hands [from giving (spending in Allah’s Cause) alms] . They have forgotten Allah, so He has forgotten them. Verily, the hypocrites are the Fasiqun (rebellious, disobedient to Allah). (Sr at Taubah, 67) Interpretation: The characteristics of the hypocrites and their ounishment. But as for those in whose hearts is a disease (of doubt, disbelief and hypocrisy), it will add suspicion and doubt to their suspicion, disbelief and doubt; and they die while they are disbelievers. See they not that they are put in trial once or twice every year (with different kinds of calamities, disease, famine)? Yet, they turn not in repentance, nor do they learn a lesson (from it). And whenever there comes down a Surah (chapterfrom the Qur'an), they look at one another (saying): (Does any one see you?9 Then they turn away. Allah has turned their hearts (from the light) because they are a people that understand not (Sr at Taubah, 126 -127) Interpretation: Afflictions suffered by the hypocrites as a result of rejecting the Truth. The reasoning behind their stance is questioned, explaining that they neither can nor want nor attempt to understand Allahs word (saw), actively choosing falsehood over Truth.

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The way (of blame) is only against those who oppress men and rebel in the earth without justification; for such there will be a painful torment. (Sr ash Shura, 42) Interpretation: There is punishment for those who initiate harm and wrongful behaviours towards others. Till, when (such a one) comes to Us, he says [to his Qarn (Satan/ devil companion)], * Would that between me and you were the distance of the two east9s (or the east and west)9 a worst (type of) companion (indeed)! (Sr az Zukhruf 38) Interpretation: The situation of those people who take Shaitan as a companion and are, therefore, distanced from Allahs Mercy (swt). Hadith Narrated Abdullah bin Umar (ra): The Prophet (as) sent Khalid bin al-Walid to the tribe of Jadhima and Khalid invited them to Islam but they could not express themselves by saying (Aslamna (ie., we have embraced Islam),9 but they started saying, Sab9na! Sab9na! (Le., we have come out of one religion to another).9 Khalid kept on killing (some of) them and taking (some of) them as captives and gave everyone of us his captive till the day when Khalid ordered that each man (Le., Muslim soldier) should kill his captive. I said, ‘By Allah I will not kill my captive and none of my companions will kill his captive.9 When we reached the Prophet (saw), we mentioned to him the whole story. On that, the Prophet (saw) raised both his hands and said twice, ‘O Allah! I am free from what Khalid has done.9 (Bukhari, B57, C33, HI674) Theme: The Prophet (saw) sent Khalid bin al-Walid (ra) (to fight) with Banu Jadhima The ayaat and Hadith demonstrate the effect of negative behaviour on the character. In a therapy setting, ‘bad/blameworthy behaviour’ by any individual may be pathologised as an illness. However, it is important to recognise the distinction between bad and ill behaviour since where there is illness there is no call to accounting as opposed

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to where there is bad behaviour. What commonly occurs with relatives of patients with drug addiction, for example, is that they mistake forgiveness for support and so end up forgiving the ‘bad’ behaviour under the misunderstanding that they are being supportive. True support is being realistic about events and dealing with them rather than re-interpreting them to the extent that the danger therein is disguised or dismissed to the detriment of that individual and their family/friends. This form of support also normalises the unhelpful behaviour, adding further hindrance to healing. The final ayah (Sr AzZukhruf, 38) clearly indicates that when the behaviour is recognised for what it is, most individuals will attempt to distance themselves from it. A hadith

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It was related that Abu Huraira said that The Messenger of God (saw) passed by a heap of foodstuff and placed his hand within it, then his fingers became wet, so he said: ‘O owner of this heap offoodstuff, what is this?9 He replied: ‘O Messenger of God, the sky rained upon it9 He said: ‘Why do you not put it on top of the heap so that the people can see it? Whoever cheats is not upon our Islamic way.9 (Muslim, C22,H949) Theme: The book of selling

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It was related that Nawwas ibn Shim’an said: I asked the Messenger of God (saw) about virtue and vice. He said: ‘ Virtue is a kind nature and vice is whatfesters in your heart and that which you detest for anyone to know.9 (Muslim, C56, HI 800) Theme: The book of virtue and joining the ties of relationship It is a common phenomenon that when wrongful behaviour is being committed, the person tends to do it in secret - a strong indication of its being deceitful/bad behaviour. The examples given in the above ahadith demonstrate how individuals may lie to themselves about their behaviour.

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Ayah Nay! But on their hearts is the Ran (covering of sins and evil deeds) which they used to earn. (Sr al Mutaffifin, 14) Interpretation: The Record of those described as Wicked and how their hearts are covered with a covering overcoming their hearts and on the Day of Judgement will be veiled from seeing Allah (swt). The ayah demonstrates how once a patient embarks on a certain type of self-destructive behaviour, it is hard for them to recognise why the behaviour is a problem for others, resulting in increased isolation and so reducing the possibility of allowing/hearing advice that challenges this. Avaat (I seek refuge) from the evil of what He has created, and from the evil of the darkening (night) as it comes with its darkness; (or the moon as it sets or goes away), and from the evil of those who practise witchcraft when they blow in the knots, and from the evil of the envier when he envies. (Sr al Falaq, 3-5) Interpretation: The mischief within Creation which includes Shaitan, his progeny and Hell. The evil of the darkness is said to refer to the declination of the heavenly body Plaedies since its decline resulted in increased illness and would decrease when it rose. Others claim that the evil of the darkness is the Moon. The women who blow on the knots is a reference to black magic. It is a sad fact that there does exist individuals who intentionally harm other people. The therapist may have many explanations but no justifications for certain issues presented in therapy, especially in cases of physical assault/violence. Of course, explanation does not negate responsibility nor does it indicate acceptability of the behaviour but it is the case that the reality of this fact should necessarily be acknowledged.

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shall have a painful torment. And verily, among them is a party who distort the Book with their tongues (as they read), so that you may think it is from the Book, but it is not from the Book, and they say: 6 This is from Allah,9 but it is not from Allah; and they speak a lie against Allah while they know it. (SrA’le Imran, 77- 78) Interpretation: There is no share in the Hereafter for those who break Allah’s Covenant, (swt) preferring the life of this world than the Hereafter. The Jews at the time would alter the meaning of the words of Qur’an to deceive ignorant people and attribute their own words to the Qur’an. The parable of those who disbelieved in their Lord is that their works are as ashes, on which the wind blows furiously on a stormy day; they shall not be able to get aught of what they have earned'. That is the straying, far away (from the Right Path). (Sr Ibrahim, 18) Interpretation: A parable of the disbelievers who reject Allahs Message (swt) and His Messengers (as), whose acts have a weak foundation. They will gain no reward for their behaviour except that vhich can be retained from ashes in the wind. This is what it means to stray. And be not like her who undoes the thread which she has spun, after it has become strong, by taking your oaths as a means of deception among yourselves, lest a nation should be more numerous than another nation. Allah only tests you by this (i.e. who obeys Allah andfulfils Allah s Covenant and who disobeys Allah and breaks Allahs Covenant). And on the Day of Resurrection, He will certainly make clear to you that wherein you used to differ (i.e. a believer confesses and believes in the Oneness of Allah and in the Prophethood of Prophet Muhammad which the disbeliever denies and that is their difference amongst them in the life of this world). (Sr an Nahl, 92) Interpretation: There was a woman living in Mecca who would spin thread, strengthen it and then undo it and she was described

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by a Companion, Ibn Zayd (ra) as being ‘like the one who breaks a Covenant after confirming it.’ The context of the ‘undoing’ is interpreted in this ayah as something treacherous. Verily, those who have turned back (have apostatised) as disbelievers after the guidance has been manifested to them . Shaitan (Satan) has beautified for them (their false hopes), and (Allah) prolonged their term (age). (Sr Muhammad, 25) Interpretation: Condemning apostasy, where Shaitan has made disbelief seem a good thing. Hadith Narrated Abu Bakra (ra): The Prophet (saw) said thrice: Should I inform you about the greatest of the great sins? ’ They said: 'Yes, O Allah s Messenger!'He said: ' 1) To join others in worship with Allah and 2) to be undutiful to one’s parents. ’ The Prophet (saw) then sat up after he had been reclining (on a pillow) and said: e3) And I warn you against giving a lying speech (false statement)9 and he kept saying that warning till we thought he would not stop. (Bukhari, B50, C2, HI 176). Theme: What has been said about false witness The ayaat/hadith hint at the futility of choosing the unhelpful strategy over the helpful simply to maintain the defence mechanism and not consider the negative effects it can have. This can cause the patient to lose direction or can simply be difficult to sustain, since its foundation is weak. Ayah And make not Allah 9s (Name) an excuse in your oaths against your doing good and acting piously, and making peace among mankind. And Allah is All-Hearer, All-Knower (i.e. do not swear much and ifyou have sworn against doing something good then give an expiation for the oath and do good). (Sr al Baqarah, 224) Interpretation: The prohibition to abandon a good deed. Allah

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(swt) is aware in spite of the excuses made to others. The ayah describes the process and destruction to the character of exploiting information for ones own gains, a person may be convinced that their position is correct or that they do not wish to face the consequences that changing their attitude will involve. It is often the case that patients will lean on the evidence that supports their argument even if it does not withstand criticism. Failing this, as the above ayah demonstrates, patients may quote a more powerful source and make a vague association with the source and their argument, even if the facts do not support their position. Ayah Then after the distress, He sent down security upon you. Slumber overtook a party of you, while another party was thinking about themselves (as how to save their own selves, ignoring the others and the Prophet) and thought wrongly of Allah the thought of ignorance. They said, Have we any part in the affair?’ Say (O Muhammad): ‘Indeed the affair belongs wholly to Allah. ’ They hide within themselves what they dare not reveal to you, saying: ‘If we had anything to do with the affair, none of us would have been killed here. ’Say: ‘Even ifyou had remained in your homes, thosefor whom death was decreed would certainly have gone forth to the place of their death, ’ but that Allah might test what is in your breasts; and to purify that which was in your hearts (sins), and Allah is All-Knower ofwhat is in (your) breasts. (Sr A ’le Imran, 154) Interpretation: The believers fell into a peaceful sleep when they became distressed during the Battle of Uhud. The ‘others ’ refers to the hypocrites who were in defiance of the Truth. Allah (swt) revealed the secrets that were hidden in their hearts; thoughts which they tried to conceal from Prophet Muhammad (saw). It is often the case when patients are distressed that they blame Allah (swt) for their situation but do not reflect on how their own strategies can result in a negative impact on their faith and their relationship with the Creator (swt).

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To be charitable and pure in intention are simple yet very powerful styles of interaction/behaviours and have made impressive in-roads in solving difficulties. This also ensures justice in behaviour and not exceeding limits. As the ayaat suggest, when patients are anxious and their relatives distressed there can be a tendency to become angry or aggressive or resort to more malevolent behaviours, which may inflame the situation. Alternatively, they may remind others of past favours done which may nullify the favour, since the intention then becomes questionable/a trade. The emphasis on softness of speech and the benefit this has on improving relationships is self evident and it is often the case that the tone and not necessarily the content of a conversation that is more powerful in creating change . Ayaat So, Allah gave them the reward of this world, and the excellent reward of the Hereafter. And Allah loves Al-Muhsinun (the gooddoers). (Sr A’le Imran, 148) Interpretation: Allah (swt) gave victory and a good end as well as gains in this life, for Allah (swt) loves those who do good. Repel evil with that which is better. We are Best Knower of the things they utter. (Sr al Muminun, 96) Interpretation: Treat kindly those who exhibit bad behaviour, so as to soften their hearts, turning their enmity to friendship

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Good deeds are not equal to evil ones, repel (other fs) evil deeds with (your) good deeds. You will see that he with whom you had enmity, will become your close friend. But none will attain the quality except those who patiently endure and none will attain this quality except those who are truly fortunate. (Sr Fussilat, 34-35) Interpretation: Order to treat the ones who harm you with better behaviour since that good deed will result in reconciliation as closeness will develop between two people who were ‘enemies.’ The ayaat also highlight that this is difficult to do and requires patience with a reward of being saved from Shaitan and reduces enmity between people. Ahadith Narrated Jarir bin Abdullah al-Bajali (ra): The Prophet (saw) said: ‘He who is not merciful to others will not be treated mercifully.9 (Bukhari ,B7J, CIO, H2017) Theme: (What is said regarding) being merciful to the people and animals. (This hadith makes clear the benefit of mercy as a quality is ultimately to oneself.) Narrated Aisha (ra): Allah 9s Messenger (saw) said: ‘Be calm, O Aisha! Allah loves that, one should be kind and lenient in all matters.9 (Bukhari, B71, C15. H2025) Theme: To be kind and lenient in all matters. Narrated Anas bin Malik (ra): The Prophet (saw) was neither a Sabbab (one who would abuse others) nor a Fahish (one who speaks bad words), nor a one who would curse (others) and if he wanted to admonish anyone ofus, he used to say, 'What is wrong with him, his forehead be dusted!’ (Bukhari, B71, C17,H2027) Theme: The Prophet (saw)was neither a Fahish (One who speaks bad words) nor a Mutafahhish (one who speaks obscene evil words to make people laugh).

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The ay aat!ahadith encourage the better behaviour (in all the forms described above) since it reminds of the peace one feels knowing that Allah (swt) loves their good actions, since they are actions that He Himself (swt) guides the creation to perform. Or simply that they have done the right or better thing. Such actions can often be enough to disarm the‘foe.’ Ahadith Narrated Abu Shuraih (ra): The Prophet (saw)said: (By Allah! He does not believe! By Allah he does not believe! By Allah! He does not believe! It was said, ‘Who is that O Allah 9s Messenger?9 He said: ‘That person whose neighbour does not feel safe from his evil.' (Bukhari, B71, Cl 2, H2022)

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Theme: The sin of that person whose neighbour does not feel safe from his evil. Narrated Abu Huraira (ra): Allah 9s Messenger (saw) said: ‘Whosoever believes in Allah and the last Day should not harm his neighbour, and whosoever believes in Allah and the last day should entertain his guest generously and whosoever believes in Allah and the Last Day should talk what is good or keep quiet (Le., abstain from all kinds of evil and dirty talk, e.g., abusing, lying, backbiting).9 (Bukhari, B71, Cl3, H2023) Theme: Whosoever believes in Allah and the Last Day, should not harm his neighbour. The warning in these ahadith is important since so many patients suffer significant emotional distress precisely due to disputes with neighbours, problems made worse by exhibiting the above mentioned behaviours. They are reminder to be mindful of the effect ones behaviour has on others and our social obligations to wider society. Avaat Verily, Allah commands that you should render back the trusts to those, to whom they are due; and that when you judge between men, you judge with justice. Verily, how excellent is the teaching

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