The Messenger: There Is Hope for the Future by Linda Emmanuel (2008-01-29) 2008900210, 9781419686542

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The Messenger: There Is Hope for the Future by Linda Emmanuel (2008-01-29)
 2008900210, 9781419686542

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THE MESSENGER “There is hope for the future”


Linda Emmanuel

Copyright© 2007 by Linda Emmanuel Published by Booksurge Publishing 7290 B Investment Drive North Charleston, SC 29418 All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced or transmitted in any form, electronic or mechanical, including photocopy or recording without the written permission of the author.


First Edition December 2007 Library of Congress Control Number: 2008900210 Publisher: BookSurge Publishing North Charleston, South Carolina ISBN:

978-1-4196-8654-2 Other books by the author:

The Angel Children® interactive talking activity e-books: Book I - I Love Who I Am Book cover by Linda Emmanuel Illustrations by Phil Benson Funny Stuff, Ltd. Some people’s names and the names of some places in this book have been changed or left out to protect people’s privacy.

DEDICATION With love, this book is dedicated to

Dale who saved my life and who I will love forever. You are my best friend and you are my hero. And thank you for being such a good sport! This one’s for you Poo!

ACKNOWLEDGMENTS I wish to especially thank Dr. Harold Clark and the Common Cause Medical Research Foundation for their dedication and research of the organism mycoplasma. If not for them, a happy ending to my story would never have been possible.

For more information about the people and products in this book, please visit my website

DISCLAIMER The information I have provided in this book is to be used for educational purposes only. I am not a doctor and am not practicing medicine. The publisher and I do not prescribe or recommend treatments mentioned in this book and do not assume responsibility for the reader’s actions. In no way whatsoever should the information in this book be considered a substitute for competent health care provided by a professional.


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Introduction Looking for the Loophole Wake Up Sleepy Head! All You Have to Do is Show Up The Good Samaritan Confirmations Come in the Strangest Ways! A Farewell to Arm Mother Mary’s Words of Wisdom One More Clue is Revealed Earth, Mother, Father Foundation The Prophecy The Birth of the Angel Children Be Careful What You Wish For! I Smell a Rat! Searching for the Answer–Why? I’m Just Dying to Get Better! Finally Something to Get Excited About A Blessing in Disguise Who was that Un-Masked Man? There’s No Such Thing as a Free Lunch! Seeing is Believing Who Took My Paperwork? It’s a Sign! Never Stop Believing in Miracles! The Universe Will Return My Money! Something Good Out of Something Bad The Escape Clause Once Is Not Enough! Is There a Doctor in the House?

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The Painful Truth Gentlemen! Start Your Search Engines It’s No Acid-ent Why Some People Do Not Get Sick Food for Thought The Answer to the Million Dollar Question–Why Do I Feel So Tired and So Sick? The Verdict’s In Good Vibrations The Magic Bullet He Just Doesn’t Get It! The Night Visitor Getting Back into the Swing of Things Once Again the Sleeping Tiger Awakens Putting Out the Last Fire Go West and Seek Fame and Fortune! My Quantum Leap Where’s My Knight in Shining Armor? Never Give Up! My Father Always Knows Best Taming the Savage Beast Conclusion: I Believe in Angels


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FOREWORD “If everyone agrees with what I have written, it probably wasn’t worth writing.” At the present time, our country and for that matter the entire world, is in the grips of a terrible epidemic. The organism I am referring to is called mycoplasma. This organism is the cause of many of today’s diseases: Alzheimer’s, Parkinson’s, ALS, multiple sclerosis, lupus, endometriosis, ADD/ADHD, Fibromyalgia, bi-polar depression, Chronic Fatigue Syndrome, Psoriasis, lupus, RA, and many others too numerous to list. How can I so confidently state the above? Because reliable, dedicated researchers and scientists have proven beyond a reasonable doubt that this organism exists and is the cause of these diseases. (See Symptoms and Diseases Caused by Mycoplasma.) Up until now, these diseases have meant only “doom and gloom” for families all around the globe, but this book will give them hope. Mild Silver Protein (MSP), as proven by my medical records and scientific research, kills this disabling organism with very little side effects and no harm to the human body. I cannot truthfully say that MSP is a 100 percent “cure,” because the treatment is NOT a vaccine and does not guarantee that once a person is “cleansed” of this organism, that he/she will not get reinfected again if he/she shares body fluids with an infected person. Also, if a mycoplasma-infected person receives the treatment, the treatment does not automatically reverse the damage the organism has already caused. As in my case, my body has healed, but I will never be the same Linda I was before I became ill. But there’s good news! The pain in my joints has almost disappeared! Finally, I take full responsibility for the content and subject matter in this book. I also accept the fact that many people will criticize me and reject this book. But if I can inspire and give hope to the sick and weary and make a difference in just one person’s life, the pain and suffering I had to go through was worth it! I just ask that you open your mind and allow yourself to become enlightened, for you will never read another story like mine!

Chapter 1

Introduction November 2005

“For a creative writer, possession of the truth is less important than emotional sincerity.” – George Orwell One evening in November 2005, I was sitting in my kitchen listening in on a telephone conference given by Steve Harrison of Bradley Communications in Lansdowne, Pennsylvania. Steve’s telephone conferences are free, and he gives tips and advice to new authors on how to become successful marketers of their books. At that time, I had just finished my first children’s book and was ready to learn how to become a successful author. This particular telephone conference was entitled, “The Quantum Leap.” I can’t remember Steve’s exact words when he began the telephone conference, but they went something like this: “If you wrote a children’s book, just hang up the phone. This conference call is not for you.” Well, of course, I had no intention of hanging up the phone. Instead, I stayed on the line and listened. Steve then told us that all successful authors had one thing in common. They offered more than just books to their readers. Their real success was in selling products and giving lectures and seminars, and their books were just a marketing tool used to build a customer base. He then went on to say that successful authors offered people something they either wanted or needed. At that moment, a lightbulb went on in my head. “Oh my God!” I said out loud. “I need to write my story and tell people about the prophecy, how it is coming true! Why didn’t I think of this before?” I remember my friend Carol encouraging me to write my story, but, up until now, I had never given it a second thought. Now I understood what I had to do. I had to tell my story. Many lives would then be saved and no one would have to suffer and die from mycoplasma again. At the end of the telephone conference, I decided to fill out and submit an Internet application to participate in Steve’s Quantum Leap Program. Filling out an application just to give someone money 11

sounds crazy, but Steve was only taking ten to twelve people to participate in his program. Also, he was only considering authors whom he thought would make at least a six-digit income the first year alone! I knew the competition would be tough, because there were hundreds of wanna-be’s just like me applying for the few slots available. So being singled out and chosen for the program all boiled down to who submitted the best “hook.” I had listened to many of Steve’s telephone conferences before and had learned how important it was to have a good “hook.” Competition is tough in the world of writing when it comes to vying for free air time on TV and other shows. Producers scan thousands of press releases and correspondence daily. Obviously, only a couple of seconds are given to each submission. A “hook” is usually a one-liner, a grabber subject line which arouses their curiosity and compels them to stop and read a particular press release or submission. The media is always looking for human-interest stories which will capture more audiences. It’s all about money and ratings. The “hook” has to be sensational but also true, otherwise, they (the producers) will quickly lose interest and move on to the next submission. Again, for the Quantum Leap Program I was competing with hundreds of others for a few openings. The best that I could do was give it my best shot and write what I considered a great “hook” on the application. After electronically submitting it, all that was left for me to do was sit back and wait for Bradley Communications to respond. Within two days I received an e-mail. Bradley Communications informed me that they liked my application and gave me an appointment time when I should call in and talk to Steve personally. When I called in for the interview, Steve answered the phone himself. He went over my application with me, and we discussed my idea for a book. I told him that it was important my story be told, because it would benefit millions of people. I felt the pressure mount as I was selling Steve my idea for a book that I hadn’t even begun yet! I briefly told him my story about how I had been diagnosed in 2001 with lupus, rheumatoid arthritis, and bi-polar depression. Then I told him about the miraculous treatment I had received which saved my life and that now I was symptom-free. I went on to tell him that this treatment could be used for other diseases caused by mycoplasma, such as Alzheimer’s, Parkinson’s, multiple sclerosis, and fibromyalgia.


I also told him that my blood tests were my proof that I was well. They revealed that the diseases were now under control and in FULL remission and that I was healthy. I summed it all up by emphasizing that my book could be the story of the century. It was meant to be, because Steve believed me! We then went over what the Quantum Leap Program was all about. The program included several seminars and several one-on-one coaching sessions with Steve and his brother. The program was to “groom” authors and prepare them for TV, radio and other talk shows. By the end of the program, the participants would be able to present themselves very well in any media situation. Not only did Bradley Communications teach authors how to be the perfect guests on a talk show, but they also taught authors important marketing skills. To me, this was very important, because I was inexperienced where to even begin or how to market myself. Up until now, I had learned everything the hard way. At that time, Steve accepted me into his Quantum Leap Program. I agreed to send Bradley Communications a check right away, and Steve gave me the name of a contact person who would keep in touch with me. He also stated he would be talking to me again on the phone before we met at the first seminar in Philadelphia. When I hung up the telephone, I was excited, but reality sunk in. Now I had my work cut out for me. The first Quantum Leap seminar was the second weekend in December, and I didn’t even have the book started yet! I had six weeks to finish it, and it had to be done no later than the first week in December. I had to start somewhere, so I sat down and drew up an outline and then just dove in and did it. Amazingly, by the beginning of December, I had finished 28 chapters. In the beginning when I sat down to write the book, I reflected on what had happened to me over the past six years. As I relived my story, I realized I had literally gone through Hell. In 2002 I was 100 percent disabled and had almost died. Then, miraculously, in 2004 I had found an alternative treatment for my diseases and was healed! If someone had a crystal ball and had told me about the events in my life leading up to now, I would have laughed and told them they were crazy! I would never have believed it. To think, in 2000, I was just another woman minding my own business and caught up in my own little world. Like most people, I didn’t pay much attention to what was really going on in the world and


had no idea of how many people were sick or getting sick. Now, I am a totally different Linda. I must add that my intention behind this book is not to convert you to my belief system but to only share my personal experience and the knowledge I have gained. As you read my story, you will find that many people were involved in helping me. These people were from many different faiths and walks of life, but they ALL (good and evil) played important roles in making my story end happily ever after. I believe God works through all religions, and we are all His instruments, even if we are not consciously aware of it. May your heart be kindled by my story and may it strengthen your own personal relationship with God, our Father.


Chapter 2

Looking for the Loophole One day in Heaven, God decided to take a stroll. Just as God was nearing the entrance to Heaven, He heard a most distressing sound. There, right outside of the pearly gates, He found St. Peter sitting on a rock crying his eyes out. God stopped and looked down at St. Peter and asked, “What’s wrong, my son? Why are you crying?” Trembling in fear, St. Peter looked up at God and cried out,“Father, do you punish people for something they did not do?” God was quite taken back by this question, but lovingly answered, “No, my son I would never punish a person for something he did not do. Why would you even ask such a question?” St. Peter then confessed, “Well, last night I forgot to lock the gates, and all Hell broke loose!” As a child growing up in the Midwest, I attended church every Sunday. I admit I found the church service boring, but I loved going to Sunday school. Being the middle child in my family, I was a natural-born instigator. Also being inquisitive, I remember asking my Sunday school teacher the question, “What are we going to do when we’re in Heaven?” Being sincere, she answered, “We’re all going to stand around in robes and sing.” I quickly responded, “That’s Hell!” I was never satisfied with her answers and was persistent to the point of being a pest. I asked her yet another question, “If God is love.....why is he sending all those innocent people to Hell?” She must have had the patience of Job but by now was getting agitated with me. Without hesitation, she said in an authoritative voice, “Well, you just have to accept it!” Rebelliously, I answered, “I can’t. How can I be in Heaven when I know all those people are suffering and burning up down there? Who’s gonna put out the fires?” Then I remember she just gave up, rolled her eyes, and shook her head. In 1991, I had just turned 40, at which time I began seriously thinking about what life was all about. Just like everyone else, I had many unanswered questions: What is my purpose down here? Where was I before I was born? What’s going to happen to me when I die? So, in earnest, I began looking for the “loophole” which would make it possible for me to get into Heaven. 15

After trying on many religions for size, I came to the conclusion that religion just wasn’t cut out for me. I discovered that many religions were judgmental of each other. They each thought they were right and everyone else was wrong. Why do people have to fight and kill each other over religion? Frustrated, I asked myself, “Why doesn’t God just step in and stop all this madness?” Finally, in 1992, after still not finding the “perfect” religion, I just gave up and stopped searching. Still trying to believe that there was “someone in charge,” I remember standing alone in my backyard one sunny afternoon thinking about God and all of his crazy religions. I then looked up to the Heavens and defiantly shook my fist (at God) and said, “I would rather there be nothing than this!” Thinking that I’d had the last word, I put God and ALL thoughts of religion on the back burner and stopped looking for the loophole.


Chapter 3

Wake Up Sleepy Head! April 2000

Some people light up a room when they leave it, and then there are those who light up a room when they enter it. For the next several years, life went on. But, in the year 2000, when I was approaching the age of 50, my life became stressful. I had just ended a relationship with a live-in boyfriend of twelve years and now found myself in a dilemma. He wanted me back, but I didn’t share his sentiment. Persistent and not taking “no” for an answer, he just wouldn’t give up. When we broke up in the fall of 1999, he had abruptly packed up his belongings and moved to Plano, Texas, where he bought our “dream” home. Then, after realizing I wasn’t going to take the bait and move to Texas, he decided to move back to St. Louis instead. Now for the first time in 12 years, he was proposing marriage to persuade me to change my mind. Matters only worsened when my oldest son moved back home that same year after his own divorce. Now the situation really became strained. My oldest son and my ex-boyfriend couldn’t possibly live under the same roof, because they absolutely hated each other! Now, stuck in the middle, I became so stressed out that I ballooned up to 215 pounds and had to have my gall bladder taken out. In my entire life, I had never stood up to anyone and didn’t know how to do it now. Instead, I thought of a way to stall my ex-boyfriend and keep him in Texas. After telling him he couldn’t move back until he sold his house, he immediately put it up for sale. Lucky for me, he couldn’t find a buyer, even though he was asking $20,000 less than he had originally paid for it. Now it was the spring of 2000, and we were keeping our relationship going through the phone lines. Every morning at work I listened to my favorite radio show, Phillips and Company, on Y98 FM. On one particular morning in early April 2000, Guy Phillips announced he had an extraordinary guest on the program by the name of Judy Goodman. She was on the show to promote her lecture that coming Friday night entitled “The 17

Spirit World.” She turned out to be one of the most fascinating guests I had ever listened to on the radio. She was introduced as a psychic who lived in “both worlds” just like the boy in Sixth Sense, but she described herself as a “teacher of teachers.” She absolutely intrigued me. I had never heard of a psychic like Judy. In fact, I was skeptical of ALL psychics, because of my religious background. I had been taught to not trust them and that they were associated with the Devil or witchcraft. During the radio show, many listeners called in to get readings. Amazingly, Judy only had to ask for the caller’s name and then was able to give each of them an accurate reading. Spellbound, I listened as each caller verified that she was right on the money. In my entire life, I had never heard of or seen anyone like Judy. At that moment, I decided I had to go to her Friday night lecture and see her in person. After getting home from work that night, I called my boyfriend in Texas and told him what I had heard on Y98 that morning. Excited, I told him I was planning to attend Judy Goodman’s lecture that coming Friday night. He, too, seemed interested and asked me to call him after the lecture and tell him all about it. When Friday night finally rolled around, I was so anxious to get a good seat, that I arrived at the lecture 45 minutes early. In my mind, I thought there would be hundreds, maybe thousands of people waiting in line to see Judy. However, my expectations fell short, because she was up against some pretty tough competition. On that same night there was a Blues hockey playoff, and the Cardinals were playing their season opener. Actually, only around 20 people attended the lecture, which turned out to be perfect! Being part of a small audience meant I could ask lots of questions. The lecture was to begin at 7:00 and Judy arrived at 6:30. When Judy walked in, there were only three other people there, including me. Immediately, Judy walked up to me and introduced herself. I must admit I was very nervous as I shook her hand. To my surprise, she asked if she could have someone take a picture of us together. Of course, I was very flattered and said yes. Right on time, the lecture started at seven o’clock. Early on, I had requested to sit in the front row so I could see Judy close up and ask questions. However, telling me no at first, the sponsor in charge told me that the front row seats were reserved for the other sponsors. Persistent and not taking no for an answer, I finally got my way and sat 18

in the front row. It turned out that they (the sponsors) enjoyed sitting in the back to observe people’s reactions to Judy. When Judy began her lecture, her words were like beautiful music to my ears. I knew in my heart that what she was saying was the truth I had been searching for my entire life. She mentioned topics I had been reading about and had watched on TV. Everything she said made perfect sense to me. One of the subjects Judy talked about was old souls. She began by saying, “Mother Theresa is an old soul, and the Pope is an old soul.” Then she stopped and, pointing to me, said, “And you’re a ‘notable,’ and one day you will be a great teacher.” Caught completely by surprise and somewhat embarrassed to be singled out by Judy, I was speechless yet at the same time flattered. Unfortunately, I didn’t get to stop her and ask her, “What’s a notable?” But now my curiosity was aroused. As I sat there, I wondered, “What’s a notable?” At that moment, I figured out a notable must be someone in history whose name we would all recognize. As the night wore on, I asked Judy many questions. Again, I’m the type of person who asks questions and only accepts something if it feels “right” for me. Judy was very patient, though, and provided sound, logical explanations to all of my questions. Judy strongly emphasized that we should not get our information from just one source. She encouraged us to seek our own truth and added what might be right for one person, may not be right for another. She also advised us that if any information we heard that night did not agree with us, to just discard it. By the end of the evening, I was sold on this new concept of “spirituality” and decided to sign up and attend her all-day seminar the next day. When I got home that night, I felt as if I were floating on a cloud. At last I had found MY truth–what I had been searching for. I recalled the lecture and the moment she had singled me out. I was right about a notable. Someone at the lecture had told me that a notable was a person in history whom we all would recognize by name. Now I was curious as to whom I had been in a past life. Trying to think, I recalled a favorite childhood Bible movie of mine. “Could I have been the person in that story?” When I was a small child, I watched this movie whenever it came on TV. Then, when I was in my thirties, I became obsessed with it. I purchased the movie through a mail order company and watched it at least once a 19

week for the next ten years. Now God (through Judy) had planted a seed. “Could I be this person?” I asked myself. That night I talked with my boyfriend in Texas. He, too, seemed interested as to what had happened at the lecture. I told him I had signed up for the seminar the next day and that I would call him when I got home the next evening. Besides wanting to learn more about the spirit world, I attended Saturday’s seminar to get answers about my current situation. Hoping to get lucky, I thought maybe I would get a “freebie” and receive a mini-reading from Judy. Amazed by what I had been told by the other attendees, I had learned that Judy had direct access to God. It was also a “no-brainer” that I was at a major crossroad in my life, and I had to make a decision, but I was a coward. Again, I had never stood up for myself in the past and had never been forced to make a “big” decision on my own. Others had always done that for me. Compounding the situation was my oldest son Mark. He and I were going through rough times. He was still angry with me over the divorce from his father 14 years earlier. He also blamed me for everything that had happened to him since. It was a hopeless situation, and we were experiencing a total breakdown in communication. (It’s very important to stop here and add that I was never able to talk privately with Judy. She was always surrounded by people, and the opportunity never popped up. Obviously, Judy never knew why I had attended her lecture or her seminar. As I write these words, I now realize that God must have “drawn” me there, and it was time for me to “wake up.”) The Saturday seminar was great. Only eight people were there, including me. At lunch we all sat around a long oblong table, and I was in luck! Judy was sitting right across from me! Now I only had to wait for an opportunity to ask a question. I didn’t have to wait long either. Again, I knew she had direct access to God, as I asked her, “Will my son and I ever get back together?” Without any hesitation, she answered, “You and your son will have to work on it, but you need to tie off that ‘loose end’ first.” Pausing, as if to collect her thoughts, she continued, “If you DO decide to tie off that loose end, there will be great turmoil for a short period of time, and then it will be over.” Again, it was impossible for Judy to have known what that “loose end” was, but I did. I believed God was telling me that“loose end” was my ex-boyfriend in Texas. (Much later, I found out that God never 20

tells us what to do. God leaves the choices up to us to make. That is why Judy used the words, “If you decide....”) Nearing the end of lunch, something else happened. We had covered many spiritual topics, but now Judy brought up a totally different subject by asking (the group), “Don’t you just love to watch Bible movies?” At that moment, I thought she had (for a split second) made eye contact with me just as she was beginning the question. So, of course, I immediately wondered, “Could God (through Judy) be telling me that I AM that person in the Bible I thought I was?” By the end of the seminar, my brain had absorbed so much new material that I was in complete overload. Although our time was up, I still had many unanswered questions. But it was now too late. It was five o’clock and the seminar was over. Judy went home in a plane and I went home in a daze.



Chapter 4

All You Have to Do Is Show Up May 2000

Forgiveness is the greatest gift of all to give someone, including yourself. When I got home that night, I decided on my own to “tie off that loose end.” I wasn’t surprised by what Judy had said came true, because there was great turmoil for a short period of time and then it was over. After May 1st, I never heard from or saw my boyfriend again. Meeting Judy Goodman marked the beginning of a new life for me. The seminar’s theme was about forgiving others, including yourself. The seminar was also about taking responsibility for the choices we make in life. After choosing to be a “victim” for over 30 years, I took full responsibility for the choices I had made. Obviously, forgiveness and responsibility go hand-in-hand. For myself, forgiving others was easy, but the most difficult task of all was letting myself “off the hook” for what I had done to others and ultimately forgiving myself. At the Saturday seminar, I did get the chance to talk with several people, and I asked them to recommend books to read. One of the first books they recommended was The Messengers, which is a true story about Nick Bunick, who is the reincarnated Apostle Paul. I enjoyed the book so much that I subscribed to Nick’s newsletter. In the book, The Messengers, Nick consulted several angel mystics. I, too, wanted very much to get a reading from a psychic, and I was in luck. At the end of the book, there was a paragraph which had an open invitation to contact his website to request the list of angel mystics who were mentioned in the book. So I sent them an e-mail and, to my surprise, immediately got a response, the list of angel mystics and their phone numbers. That same day I called each one of them and left messages on their recorders, but I only received a phone call back from Jacquelyne. But, of course, it was meant to be. We set up a reading for the following week. During the phone reading, I was very nervous and unsure of how 23

the whole thing worked. On the other hand, Jacquelyne was cool and confident with her psychic skills. Right off the bat, she proved to be authentic. She didn’t even have to ask me a single question, when she started off by telling me that I was a very old soul, which meant I have had many past lives. She then went on to tell me the names of my guardian angels and spirit guides. At one point, she said, “They’re telling me that you’re known throughout the Universe, and you volunteer to do things no one else will do. She continued by saying, “Your angels are telling me that you are going to have a ministry. You’re also going to help and inspire many people someday.” Flabbergasted, I didn’t know quite what to say. “About the ministry,” I asked, “When?” She answered, “They’re telling me that you just need to be patient and wait. Everything will be revealed to you when the time is right. They’re saying all you have to do is show up and be willing.” She then added, “They’re also telling me that if the future were to be revealed to you right now, you wouldn’t be able to handle it. They say you’re going to fill very big shoes.” At the end of the reading, she asked if I had any questions. I did ask her one, but I was hesitant. I was afraid to hear a “no” for the answer. Finally, I got up the courage and asked, “Will you ask them if I AM the person I think I am?” Jacquelyne then paused for a second and said, “Yes, they are telling me that you ARE that person, and that it is YOUR story.” Jacquelyne then became curious herself and asked, “Who were you? They won’t tell me. They want you to tell me.” Too humble, I told Jacquelyne, “No, I can’t. I’m too embarrassed. I just can’t.” Jacquelyne then started guessing. She asked, “Were you Joan of Arc?” I laughed and said, “No.” After several more guesses, she began to grow impatient and finally asked, “Who were you then?” Reluctantly, I told her, and, surprisingly, she just chuckled as if it were really no big deal. After the reading was over and I hung up the phone, I thought about what my angels had told me about my future. Even though little information had been revealed to me, I still felt completely overwhelmed. Laughing, I thought out loud to myself, “Me....a ministry? I’m not even religious!” Then I thought about the confirmation as to whom I had been in a past life. “Oh my God! I AM that person I thought I was!”


Chapter 5

The Good Samaritan July 2000

“If you can help just one person in your lifetime, you have qualified your time spent here on Earth” – Robert Morton Within the next several months I went through major changes in my life. “Letting go” of old beliefs about myself wasn’t so easy. In the first place, I had to overcome low self-esteem, and I felt bad about my physical appearance, too. So that year, I lost over 50 pounds and worked on building up my self-esteem. I also worked on making eye contact with people, especially strangers. To overcome this, I would practice while walking to and from the bus stop on work days. I would wear a CD player headset and pretend I was listening to the CD player. Then, when I passed a stranger, I would make eye contact and give him/her a little smile (an acknowledgment) and greet them. It worked! Day by day, I became more and more confident, eventually not needing to wear my “crutch” (the CD headset), anymore. As the months passed by, I began feeling better and better about myself, but I soon faced another crisis. When I thought about my past and my future–who I had been and what I was to do–I became so nervous that fear and anxiety would set in. The more I thought about it, the more anxious I became. Finally, I reached the point where I couldn’t handle it any longer. Over and over again in my mind, I kept thinking about what my angels had told me. They were right when they said I wouldn’t be able to handle it if I knew what was going to happen. They knew me better than I knew myself. “Heck!” I told myself, “ I can’t even handle the situation now.” Then to make matters worse, I felt alone. With no one to talk to who would understand what I was going through, I realized that if I didn’t get “outside” help soon, I was headed for a nervous breakdown. With no other choice, I then decided I would just shut down. So one Friday night after work, as I was getting off the bus to walk home, I gave God an ultimatum. I declared, “I’m not going to take any more steps forward until you send me someone!” At last, I was “off the 25

hook.” It was now up to God to send me someone, and the ball was in His court. The next day, I found myself glancing through the Spirit Seeker, a spiritual magazine published in St. Louis. Coincidentally, I just happened to come across an ad for a little spiritual church, located just two miles from my house. Suddenly, an idea came to me, “This would be a great opportunity to meet people of ‘like’ mind.” At that moment, I decided to attend the church service the next day. The next day, I arrived at the location, but the church was nowhere to be found. Finally, I found it. It was tucked away in a small strip mall and was hidden in the back room of a store. After entering the back room, I immediately began to feel claustrophobic. The room was VERY small, just big enough for two rows of chairs and a lectern in front for the minister. Packed with people, I could tell at once that they all knew each other. And not wanting to attract unnecessary attention to myself, I quickly sat down in the closest empty seat nearest the door, just in case I had to make a fast getaway. When the service began, the minister asked, “Is there anyone here for the first time?” Feeling everyone’s eyes on me, I didn’t look up nor did I say a word as I sat perfectly still staring down at my hands in my lap. Then, breaking the silence, the woman sitting on my left raised her hand and said, “I’m visiting today, but I’ve been here before. I haven’t been here in two years.” When the service was over, everyone stood up and began socializing again. At that moment, the woman who had been sitting on my left introduced herself to me. At once, I could tell she was friendly and seemed interested in talking to me, but it was impossible to carry on a conversation. The room was overcrowded and too noisy. Sensing my eagerness to talk, she suggested, “It’s a little noisy in here. Let’s go outside and talk where it’s more quiet.” Continuing our conversation outside on the sidewalk, I asked her how long she had been “spiritual,” and she said, “Oh, a little over 20 years.” Feeling relieved that I finally had found someone who might understand what I was going through, I told her that my new-found spirituality was hard to adjust to. She then exclaimed, “I can tell you are frazzled. I can feel your energy. It’s going every which way!” Filling her in about my recent reading with Jacquelyne and how I was overwhelmed by what I had been told, I admitted to her that I was frightened of my future. Embarrassed, I confessed that I was also 26

scared that I would fail and not be able to live up to my soul contract and God’s expectations. She then confided to me that after 20 years, she felt pretty comfortable with her situation and felt “in touch” with her spirit guides. Being the kind and understanding person she was, she added, “You know, I had the feeling I was supposed to be here today–that I was to meet someone, and I think that someone is you!” Pausing momentarily as if trying to remember something, she then said, “About 20 years ago when I first got into all of this, I wrote a poem. I don’t have it with me, but I think I still have it somewhere at home. I really do think it would help you.” She then asked for my phone number and asked if it would be okay to call me when she got home. ”Sure,” I said, “I can use all the help I can get.” At that time, I gave her my phone number and we parted. When I got home, sure enough just as she had promised, she called. She had great news. She had found the poem and then began reading it to me. I don’t remember the exact words of her poem, but it went something like this: “Don’t think about the past. Don’t think about the future. Be in the present moment.” My fears soon melted away as she explained to me the meaning of “The Present Moment.” We didn’t really talk much about anything else, except before hanging up the phone, I had one more burning question on my mind, “When did you get the feeling that you were supposed to meet someone today?” Without even pausing to think about it, she simply answered, “Friday night.” I don’t know why, but she never asked me why I asked her this question, nor did I volunteer to tell her about my cry for help on Friday night. But after thanking her and hanging up the phone, I whispered a little prayer of gratitude, “Thank you Father for sending me someone.” And from that moment on, I began living in the present moment. AUTHOR’S NOTE: I never saw or heard from “The Good Samaritan” again nor do I remember her name or what she even looks like. All I remember is she lives in Ellisville, which is right next door to Ballwin where I live.



Chapter 6

Confirmations Come In the Strangest Ways! July 2000

Two people may participate in the same event but will never share the same experience. After the “Good Samaritan” incident, I was finally able to adjust and move forward. I read several more books, including Journey of Souls, which I really enjoyed. In the meantime, I became very happy with my new life and the path I had chosen. In July, I found out that Judy Goodman was returning to St. Louis to give another lecture. Wanting my family to hear her speak this time, I made plans to take them. I also signed up and prepaid for her seminar. For several months, my family had listened to me chattering about my experience at Judy Goodman’s lecture and seminar. Now, they were going to experience her firsthand. This lecture, however, proved to be much different than the first, because the questions people asked kept focusing on aliens and UFO’s. Then, I experienced another setback. At the beginning of the lecture, Judy told the audience that people came up to her all the time telling her that they had been “somebody” in a past life. Judy also mentioned that she had even had a man come up to her claiming he had been John the Baptist in a past life. Then, she told us of another person who claimed she had been Joan of Arc. She finally finished by informing us that most of the time these people were wrong. Then her next words caught me completely off guard and struck me like a thunderbolt. “Don’t walk around thinking you’re somebody you’re not. Get confirmations!” With these last words, my bubble suddenly burst. Believing this message was meant for me, I was devastated. “Oh my God,” I thought to myself, “He’s talking to you through Judy! Who do you think you are, Linda?” With my ego deflated, I was ready to give up right then and there and call it quits. But, I hung in there and kept my thoughts to myself, not daring to tell my family what was really going on in my mind. Instead, I kept silent, feeling like an idiot. 29

Now I had another problem–I had to face Judy the next day. I was certain she knew. But since I had prepaid for the seminar, I wasn’t about to lose my money. So I decided to just make the best of it and go. Surprisingly, there was a totally different group at the Saturday seminar than at Friday night’s lecture. With only a few of the Friday night audience present, there were just eight of us. The seminar was held in a small hotel conference room. Divided by an aisle down the middle of the room, each side had six rows of chairs. Usually, I sit right up in front, but this time, I sat in the farthest corner seat in the very back row, as far away from Judy as I could possibly get. Everything was going smoothly, and by noon it was time to break for lunch. Unfortunately, Judy couldn’t go with us, because she was experiencing a terrible headache. As we split up into two groups, I joined a group of three women whom I had never met before. Of course, the topic of our lunch conversation was spirituality and soul contracts, and during lunch, each of us had an interesting story to tell. But there was one woman’s story in particular that stood out from the rest, and her story was quite bizarre. (Note: Usually, I respect another person’s privacy, but this woman’s story was incredible. I am going to tell her story, because not only is it amazing but it will also give Judy credibility. To keep this woman’s identity private, I will call her Colleen.) Colleen had attended Friday night’s lecture but didn’t get a chance to talk one-on-one with Judy. During lunch, however, Colleen told us she was there to get answers to questions regarding something that had happened to her over 25 years ago. She was now 45, and her story began when she had just turned 18. On high school graduation night, Colleen had driven her car out to a rural area around eleven o’clock. All she remembered later about that night was waking up in her car in a field around six o’clock the next morning. Adding to her confusion, her radiator had boiled over and her car had run out of gas. For the life of her, she couldn’t remember how she had gotten there or what had happened to her between the hours of midnight and six o’clock in the morning when she woke up. In other words, she could not account for those six hours of her life. Then, even stranger, she told us that the very next day she went to her doctor. After examining her, her doctor caught her completely by surprise when he announced, “You’ve just had a baby!” 30

Colleen’s story didn’t end there. Bewildered, she asked, “Doctor, how could I have just had a baby, if I’m a virgin?” All of us at the table were mesmerized by Colleen’s story. I felt sorry for her, though. She was so sweet and sincere. Haunted by her mysterious past, Colleen said it was next to impossible for her to move on with her life and find happiness. She had never gotten married and, except for that one incident, had never had another baby. Tortured by this “void” in her past, she had attended the lecture/seminar to find an answer. I could tell that she was still very upset over what had happened to her, and I’m sure she had been told this before, when I commented, “It sounds like you were abducted (meaning by aliens)!” When we all returned from lunch, Judy had recovered from her headache and began to pick up where she had left off. But before Judy could continue, a young woman sitting right across from me interrupted her. The young woman asked Judy if she would give each of us a mini-reading. Judy paused and then informed us that she usually didn’t do this, but she was getting a “yes (from God), to go ahead and do it.” Judy then started with the person in the front row catacorner to me, which just so happened to be Colleen. I wasn’t surprised when Judy didn’t have to ask Colleen a single question. Instead, right off the bat, the first words out of Judy’s mouth were, “You were abducted.” Tears started streaming down Colleen’s face, as Colleen cried out, “I want to meet my baby!” With compassion in her heart, Judy then explained to Colleen that there were some things the mind blocked out, and this experience would be too painful for her to relive. Colleen wouldn’t give up, though, and kept sobbing that she wanted to meet her child. I’m sure Judy would have liked to have spent more time with Colleen, but she had to move on. Judy finished Colleen’s reading by advising her that there was another possibility that she (Colleen) could be abducted again. Judy warned Colleen that if this did happen, it would take place near a large body of water. Judy then emphasized that if she (Colleen) chose not to be abducted, then she would not be. When Colleen’s mini-reading was over, her 25 torturous years of searching had come to an end. Colleen had finally found an answer. Judy then moved on to the next person. At this point, Judy had seven more readings to go, including me, and the way things were going, it looked as if I would be last. As I sat there while the other readings were going on, I kept thinking, “I can’t ask Judy for a 31

confirmation. What if she says that I’m not that person in the Bible? I will die of embarrassment!” At that moment, I decided not to ask Judy a single question. I would let Judy tell me what God had to say. “Besides,” I thought to myself, “this will be a good way to test Judy’s credibility.” In the meantime, the readings were taking longer than Judy had anticipated. As it got closer and closer to it being my turn, Judy kept glancing at her watch. At one point she even stopped and told us that she still had a lot of material to cover, and we would have to speed things up. Finally, it was my turn, and Judy asked, “Do you have any questions?” “No,” I replied, “God knows what I need to hear.” Pausing, Judy bowed her head, closed her eyes, and placed her fingers lightly on her forehead as if she were concentrating or tuning in to something. After a couple of seconds, she raised her head and looked straight at me, breaking the silence with a single word, “YES!” No one in the room said a word as I asked her, “Do you know what He means?” Answering my question with a question, she responded, “No, do you?” Unsure, I stammered, “” Then, without even batting an eye, Judy smiled and said, “Confirmations come in the strangest ways, don’t they?” At that moment, you could hear a pin drop in the room. Then, without further ado, Judy quickly started wrapping things up by asking, “Do you have any other questions?” Here was another chance to ask more questions, but, still in shock, I could only respond by slowly shaking my head and mouthing the word “no.” And with that, the mini-readings were over. The seminar then resumed as if nothing had happened. But for the rest of the afternoon, I was in a “fog,” as I sat there wondering, “How in the heck did God make all this come about? And what in the world prompted that woman to ask Judy for a reading in the first place? And, to think, I was going to cal it quits and give it all up!” AUTHOR’S NOTE: As for Colleen, she and I kept in contact through e-mail. For several months after the seminar, we e-mailed back and forth, then suddenly I lost contact with her. Colleen just seemed to have disappeared. Was she abducted again? Did she ever get to reunite with her child? It’s still a mystery. I never did find out what happened to her.


Chapter 7

A Farewell to Arm July 2000

I know when I die and cross over to the other side, that if I so desire, my angels will take me to my own funeral where I will see my loved ones gathered together to honor me one last time. On July 31, 2000, I was attending a dear friend’s funeral at a little country funeral home in Red Bud, Illinois. I was there along with a hundred other people, who were family, friends, and co-workers of Roger Myhre. As I sat waiting for the service to begin, I thought about all of the fond memories I had of Roger. Roger and I had worked together, and we had become good friends. Roger was a really nice guy with a great sense of humor. He had been in his mid-50's, had a wiry build, and was around 5'7". He also had a grizzled gray beard. I used to tease Roger, telling him that he looked like a “mountain man” from the Daniel Boone era. In fact, my words were close to the truth. Roger loved that time period so much that he belonged to a rendezvous group who dressed up as mountain folk. I once asked Roger what people did at a rendezvous. He told me they liked to sit around the campfire at night, spin yarns, and sing songs accompanied by fiddle and banjo players. Roger also liked to play practical jokes. For instance, when I was sitting in my cubicle, he would quietly sneak up behind me, put his hands on my shoulders and try to scare me. He got a kick out of it when I would jump up and act surprised. He never realized (or maybe he did) that I had a mirror planted, facing my cubicle entrance, so I could see everyone who entered. I never got mad at Roger, though, because he was so nice. I knew he liked me and was only having fun. Then tragedy struck. In 1998, Roger was diagnosed with colon cancer. He was a fighter and refused to let cancer beat him. Then, even though he won the battle with colon cancer, within two years he was diagnosed with liver cancer. But he still wouldn’t give up. This time he made a special trip to the Mayo Clinic, but the cancer was finally beating him. Roger was dying. 33

When Roger was in the hospital in the spring of 2000 with liver cancer, I visited him several times. Funny, Roger would patiently listen to me as I rattled on about what was happening in my life (my spiritual awakening). I believe Roger really enjoyed hearing about reincarnation, though. Maybe my words helped convince him that he had once lived a past life in his favorite place, the Smoky Mountains. You see, Roger loved to fish and also loved to hunt bear and deer. He said when he was in the “Smokies,” he would get “dejà vu,” meaning he felt as if he had been there before. Laughing, I told Roger he had been there before and probably was a mountain man in a past life. I smiled and added maybe he had even known Daniel Boone. As time passed, Roger grew weaker and weaker, until finally he couldn’t hold on any longer. He died the last week in July 2000. So, here I was in Red Bud, Illinois on Sunday, July 31, along with one-hundred other people who had also braved the heat to come out for Roger’s funeral on this hot, humid summer afternoon. As I was listening to Roger’s eulogy, I was surprised to hear that he had served in the Vietnam War as a Green Beret. Even more amazing, Roger had volunteered to be a “tunnel rat.” The Vietnamese hid in underground tunnels, and Roger, who was skinny and agile, was perfect for the job. From my understanding, tunnel rats crawled through the underground tunnels in search of the enemy. When the two met, Heaven only knows what Roger experienced as he fought hand-to-hand combat with an enemy he could not see. Very few people knew of his bravery, because Roger was a very humble person. He never once bragged about himself to me. During the service, my two bosses, James and Claude, were seated to my left and on the right side of me was an exterior wall. Since it was so hot that day, I had worn a short-sleeve dress. As the service was nearing an end and we were sitting solemnly through the Green Beret Song, I could hear people sniffling and softly sobbing. “I was in their shoes once,” I thought to myself, “I know exactly how they feel.” In reality, not only were they crying for Roger, but they were also crying for themselves, because they were afraid of the unknown (dying). On the contrary, for me there was no doubt in my mind where Roger was. His soul had never really died. When his human body bubble suit finally gave out, he had just discarded it and went through the “white” tunnel into another dimension–Home, or what most of us call Heaven. In fact, I was absolutely sure he was 34

right there at the funeral parlor watching and listening to us pay homage to him one last time. He could see and hear us, but we could not see or hear him. In fact, he could hear (telepathy) our every thought! So, in my mind, I began talking to Roger, “I know you’re here Roger. Roger, look how many people are here who loved you!” Just then, I was distracted by the feeling that something had landed on or was touching my right arm. Naturally, thinking it was a fallen hair or a gnat or a mosquito, I reacted by looking down to see what it was, but there was nothing visibly there. As I sat perfectly still, staring down at my bare arm, it felt as if something definitely was there, but I couldn’t figure out what it was. I could see that it wasn’t a hair or a gnat or a mosquito, but nonetheless, I was absolutely sure something was touching my arm. Captivated and still keeping perfectly still, I kept my eyes glued on my arm. Now my senses were telling me that it felt as if a hand was gently resting on my wrist! As I sat there hypnotized with my eyes wide open, unable to move or speak, I swear I could feel each individual finger of the hand! Then suddenly, without warning, I got goose bumps as I felt the hand slowly slide up my arm. Right after the incident was over, I immediately realized what must have happened. It had to be Roger! Oh my gosh! This time Roger had pulled off the ultimate practical joke and I finally got caught completely by surprise! Thinking back, there is no doubt in my mind now that Roger had probably gotten a real thrill and a big kick out of the entire “hairraising” episode. But maybe this was Roger’s only way of contacting me from the other side and letting me know he was okay. Or maybe this was Roger’s way of getting even and at the same time getting the last laugh by letting me know, “I finally gotcha Linda!! See you later!!” AUTHOR’S NOTE: Nevertheless, there’s a saying that each one of us is supposed to receive 15 minutes of fame in his/her lifetime. So, Roger, if you didn’t get that 15 minutes of fame you deserved, you’re getting it right now–courtesy of me. In exchange, I got to be touched by an angel!



Chapter 8

Mother Mary’s Words of Wisdom October 2000

One of the most uplifting moments in my life was when I found out that God has a sense of humor. Not too often do I remember my dreams, but one night I had a most remarkable dream that I will never forget. A woman came to me. The woman never told me her name, but somehow I knew it was Mother Mary. In the dream, I could only see her from the shoulders up, and she began talking to me. One of the things I remember her saying is, “You need a man!” Laughing at her (in my dream), I blew her a “raspberry.” When I woke up the next morning, I thought to myself, “Boy, was that a strange dream!” By now I had found new friends of “like” mind at the Soul Esteem Center in Maryland Heights, Missouri, and once a week, we got together to talk and to socialize. The highlight of the evening was when each of us shared an experience we’d had that week. That night, I told my friends about the woman who came to me in my dream who I thought was Mother Mary. Laughing, I told them what she had said. Afterwards, I laughed sarcastically as I commented, “Right! I need a man like I need a hole in the head!” Well, the next evening, I found myself home alone watching cable TV. Finding nothing worthwhile watching, I began flipping channels looking for a program to watch. As I was searching, I happened to see a commercial for a show that was airing at seven o’clock on the PAX channel. The subject of the program was about Jesus and was entitled The Mysteries of Jesus. “Hmm,” I thought to myself, “This might be interesting. I think I’m gonna watch it.” I don’t remember any details about the program, except for one segment. If I can remember correctly, it was about the discovery of a two-thousand-year-old church in Ethiopia, which was supposedly built by Jesus himself. The narrator stated that there was documentation proving that Jesus had really been there. Then, actual footage of the church was shown, inside and out. Then, what caught my attention in particular was a mosaic on the inside wall of the church. It was a 37

depiction of Mother Mary and a young Jesus. As I sat on the couch mindlessly staring at the mosaic, suddenly my eyes bugged out and my jaw dropped open (in recognition). “OH MY GOD,” I shouted out loud, “that’s the woman in my dream!” Afterwards as I sat there shaking my head in wonder, I tried to think of what else Mother Mary had told me in my dream, but for the life of me, I couldn’t remember. AUTHOR’S NOTE: Mother Mary taught me a big lesson that night. “From now on,” I told myself, “when Mother Mary speaks to me, I will listen.” I also promised Mother Mary that I would never poke fun of her again, for I now know that she will always get the last laugh.


Chapter 9

One More Clue is Revealed December 2000

Don’t be afraid to ask God for your heart’s desire. Just be grateful today for what you are about to receive tomorrow. In December, I had another angel reading with Jacquelyne. This time I wanted to find out about my two children and who they were to me. By now, after reading several more spiritual books, I had learned that we pick our parents and the situation into which we are born. I had two sons, Mark and Jeff. Mark had remarried his first wife, DJ, and they were living in Providence, Rhode Island, where they were expecting their first child in August 2001. Then, there was my youngest son Jeff. He was born in 1981. Jeff was born a healthy, happy baby. In fact, he was ahead of other babies his age. By the age of five months, he was already crawling on his hands and knees. I was so amazed at his development that I thought he would someday become quite an athlete. Then tragedy struck. On June 21, 1982, when Jeff was only ten months old, my two sons and I were involved in a head-on collision with another car. My sons escaped injury, but I wasn’t so lucky. I was thrown into the windshield. It had happened so fast that my only reaction was to instinctively throw my right arm up to shield my face. We were only going 45 mph, but the force of the impact was horrific. My wrist took all of the impact and it was broken in several places. Within a couple of years after the accident and by the time Jeff was three years old, he was diagnosed with ADD/ADHD and dyslexia processing. Oddly, we also noticed that after the accident, he had lost most of his motor skills and coordination, but we could never link this to the car accident. Jeff didn’t walk until he was three and later on was never coordinated enough to play sports or even ride a bicycle. My father always said, but couldn’t prove it, that Jeff’s learning disabilities were caused by the car accident, but Jeff escaped the accident unscathed. He was belted into a child’s car seat and didn’t get thrown forward. However, the accident was definitely a terrible trauma for all three of us. 39

At the age of three, Jeff started attending special school full-time. Then, for the next 16 years, I blamed myself for his disabilities. Somehow, I believed I was responsible for what had happened to him. I was haunted by the thoughts that maybe I had done something during my pregnancy which caused all of his problems. So, at the time of my reading in December, Jeff was 19 years old and still in school. Also, Jeff did not have much of a social life, because he was shy and fully aware that he was different from other kids. From an early age, he was sensitive to other children making fun of him. This bothered him immensely, because even though he was learning disabled, he was still very smart. When Jeff was not in school, he sat in his bedroom and watched TV or played video games. By this time, I had accepted the fact that Jeff would probably be with me for the rest of his life. During the summer of 2000, Jeff had gotten a summer job at a local hospital as a baker’s assistant. He was a good worker and loved his job. His co-workers took a liking to him, too. In fact, his boss liked his work so much that he offered Jeff a full-time job at the end of summer. But I wouldn’t let Jeff take it, because I wanted him to stay in school until he was 21. I must admit I was greedy and wanted to collect child support from his father. Now that you know some of Jeff’s history, back to my reading with Jacquelyne and my question regarding my children. Jacquelyne said that this was the first time they (my sons) had incarnated with me. She told me that Jeff was very private and his soul would not reveal whom he had been in past lives. All Jeff’s soul would say was that he had been an office holder in past lives, and he felt as if he had never gotten anything accomplished. Jeff was also working off a karmic debt from a past life, by learning how it feels to be “different.” Then Jacquelyne caught me completely by surprise. Everything was going along smoothly, until suddenly Jacquelyne stopped. Sounding confused, she asked, “How old is Jeff? I see him riding in a school bus. I also see a boy watching TV in a bedroom and looking out the window.” Suddenly, I froze. Feeling “caught” I was too embarrassed to answer her, so I didn’t. Then Jacquelyne said, “They (meaning my angels) are telling me to tell you to get him get him out in the world!!” I can’t even begin to express how guilty and embarrassed I was. Here, Jacquelyne had described Jeff to a “T.” 40

After the reading was over, I immediately started the ball rolling by doing exactly what my angels had requested me to do–to get Jeff out in the world. That same week, I contacted the hospital where he had worked during the summer and had them mail us a job application. Then, within two months, Jeff graduated from high school and was working full-time as a baker’s assistant. Now, by February 2001, everything seemed to be going smoothly at home. Jeff was happy with his new job, and my oldest son Mark and his wife DJ were still expecting their first child. Although I still had no idea what the future had in store for me, I did get one more clue of what was to come. It happened when I was at work and least expecting it. I needed to talk to Jim, a co-worker. Walking over to his cubicle, I entered it and could see that he was busy talking on the phone. He then motioned for me to sit down and wait, and, as I was about to sit down on a chair, I noticed that there was a magazine on it. Without even thinking, I picked it up, sat down on the chair, and put the magazine on my lap. As if by magic, it fell open to an article about AIDS in Africa. Curious, I started glancing at the pages. Sadly, there were ten pages in all and each page’s picture depicted the woeful plight of the AIDS victims, especially the AIDS orphans. Suddenly, I started getting goose bumps all over, and I knew immediately that this was either a signal from my angels to get my attention or they wanted to give me a confirmation. Silently I asked God, “Am I going to have something to do with AIDS in Africa?” Of course, I was clueless and had no idea what could possibly get me over there. Just then, Jim got off the phone. He was a good friend and never made fun of me or judged me. I told him what had just happened and showed him the magazine article. “Jim, I’m getting the feeling that someday I’m going to have something to do with AIDS in Africa.” But neither one of us could think of a logical explanation.



Chapter 10

Earth, Mother, Father Foundation January 2001

Be around people of “like” mind, for if you are hungry, they will feed you. In January 2001, two friends, Nita and Audrey, and I went on a one-week vacation to Sedona, Arizona. Sedona is nestled in the red rock country around 4,500 feet above sea level, and few people realize that many of the town’s inhabitants are spiritual. That was my objective–to meet more people of “like” mind, and who knows, if we just so happened to run into a few psychics along the way, our trip would be even more rewarding. I must confess, by now, I loved getting readings and was always ready to receive more clues regarding my future. Also, right before I left, I had the feeling that there would be great things waiting for me in Sedona. And I was right! On Sunday, the day after we arrived, my friends and I looked for a church to attend. We were in luck, for we just so happened to walk right into a small store which was the front entrance to the Earth, Mother, Father Foundation. When entering the back of the building, we didn’t realize that we had accidentally stumbled in at the tail end of their Sunday morning service. But even better yet, the psychics were getting ready to give individual angel messages to the attendees. As we quietly entered the room and sat down in the back. a woman by the name of Wenty approached us and stood in front of me. Wenty smiled as she looked down at me and said, “I have a message for you. Will you accept it?” Surprised, I looked up at her, flattered to be singled out amongst all these people and then nodded my head “yes.” Still smiling, she took my hands in hers and looked into my eyes and said, “Great happiness, joy and abundance of money are coming your way.” Naturally, we stayed after the service and met the rest of the group. First, we were greeted by Mary-Margareht, who was the founder of Earth, Mother, Father Foundation, and she invited us to attend their activities during the week. For example, on Monday night Gabriel channeled your angels. On Wednesday evening, Mary- Margareht led 43

a meditation, and on Thursday evening Wenty led the activity. Mary-Margareht also told us that she was an intuitive healing facilitator, so I scheduled a one-hour session with her that Wednesday afternoon. My Wednesday session with Mary-Margareht was enlightening. Mary-Margareht is an extraordinary person with many gifts, and I would best describe her as an excellent psychic. She can see the other dimensions and can telepathically communicate with spirit, too. During the reading, Mary-Margareht informed me that my angels first wanted me to release some fears carried forward from some of my past lives. She then said, “Your angels are telling me that you are afraid to cross over water.” Mary-Margareht could never have known this, that I was frightened of driving my car over large bodies of water, but it was true. I was afraid when I drove my car over water, especially over bridges. I didn’t know why, but I would imagine my car crashing through the guard rails and sinking in the deep dark waters with me trapped inside. I had a terrible fear of drowning this way. I agreed with what Mary-Margareht told me and confirmed this, “Yes, I am afraid of bridges and crossing over large bodies of water.” Mary-Margareht then went on to tell me that a “fear” we can’t explain in this life is usually carried forward from a past life experience. She explained that once a person understands where the fear originated, he or she can then release it. The fear is then gone forever. My angels (through Mary-Margareht) told me of a past life where I was in a transport-like ship with my three children and several other passengers. My children and I were traveling to meet my husband who was on a business trip, and we were flying in to meet him for a minivacation. As the transport was flying over a large body of water, it had mechanical failure and crashed into the water. As the transport was sinking, I almost drowned trying to save my children. My angels then told me that one of my children did drown, but once I returned “Home,” I understood why this had to happen. The last fear my angels had me release was a fear of freezing to death. Funny, they were right. I did have a fear of freezing. My angels told me that in a past life I had frozen to death with a group of people in a snowstorm. Being told about the origins of my fears did bring closure to them. To this day, I no longer am afraid of driving 44

over a bridge nor am I afraid of freezing to death. After my session was over, Mary-Margareht invited my friends and me to attend her meditation that evening. That night, only six people showed up, including the three of us. The other three people were from the Chicago area, and they were visiting Sedona looking for real estate to buy. After the meditation, Mary-Margareht had us all sit around in a small circle on folding chairs set up in the middle of the room. She didn’t tell us why but then instructed us to close our eyes and squeeze them together as tight as we could. After a few seconds, she told us to open them. None of us questioned why we were doing this or asked what was going to happen. We just did exactly what she told us to do. The first time, I did exactly as she said. I shut my eyes and squeezed them together as tightly as I could. Then I opened them. Nothing! Nothing happened. I tried again. Nothing! As we sat there, we were, of course, clueless and had puzzled looks on our faces. Mary-Margareht still didn’t tell us why we were doing this eye exercise, but then, pointing up at the ceiling fan, suggested, “If that doesn’t work, try looking up at the light as long as you can. Then shut your eyes, squeeze them together, and then open them.” After staring up at the ceiling fan light for about ten seconds, I shut my eyes and squeezed them tightly shut. Then I opened them. For some reason, I happened to glance over to my right. What I saw next, I could hardly believe my eyes, for right next to me hovering above the Chicago man’s head was an angel! The angel was about 18 inches tall and dressed all in white. Also, the angel’s hands were clasped together as if in prayer, and the angel had wings! It was beyond belief. With eyes and mouth wide open in wonderment, I looked over at Mary-Margareht and pointed my finger at the Chicago man’s head. Finally finding my voice, I stammered, “Ma....Ma....Mary-Margareht! There.....there.....there’s an angel over that....that...that man’s head!” Mary-Margareht smiled and nodded her head, meaning yes. Then I looked down and to my right, and lo and behold, right next to my chair was a beautiful floating iridescent globe which was a little bigger than a softball! As I pointed my finger down at the floating globe, I exclaimed, “Mary-Margareht, there’s a blue globe floating next to my chair!” Again, Mary-Margareht smiled and nodded a “yes” as she explained, “That’s Michael, the Archangel.” 45

I know this story will be hard for most people to digest, but I swear the aforementioned really did happen. Afterwards, Mary-Margareht explained to us how this had all come about. She said that as we get older, our eye muscles tighten. Earlier, when we had squeezed our eyelids tightly shut, this had momentarily loosened our eye muscles just enough for us to briefly get a glimpse of the other dimensions (frequency) or what some might call the other side of the veil. On Thursday evening, my friends and I then attended Wenty’s activity, which was one of the most important events I had ever attended in Sedona. Wenty taught us how to “shift” energy and use the “power of intent.” AUTHOR’S NOTE: By the time we left Sedona, my friends and I agreed that this was a trip we would never forget. Just as soon as I left, I wanted to turn around and go back. I had made friends there that I would keep for the rest of my life. I didn’t know it then, but these friends would also play an important part in helping me fulfill my destiny.


Chapter 11

The Prophecy February 2001

To be able to see the light at the end of the tunnel, you must first step into the tunnel. Off and on for the past several years, I had been experiencing severe foot and heel pain. Although, I was being treated by a foot doctor, he had only made the symptoms worsen. I was now getting closer and closer to going “under the knife” (surgery) to relieve the terrible pain. But I was also worried, because this surgery was very dangerous. The outcome could be crippling and leave me in a wheelchair for the rest of my life. So, obviously I was searching for an alternative treatment. Through friends at the Soul Esteem Center, I heard about a man in New York who was a psychic and similar to Edgar Cayce. (Note: Edgar Cayce was born in the late 1800's and was an intuitive healer. He would go into a trance-like meditation and channel spirit. He then would receive messages regarding a particular person’s health. When the word got out about his ability to diagnose hopeless cases, people flocked to him from all over the world. He would also come up with the remedy to heal people whom doctors had given up on. I had read several articles about Edgar Cayce and learned that he had diagnosed and cured over 1,500 people during his lifetime. He also became a great prophet and foretold the future. He still has a devoted following and there is also an institute bears his name in Virginia Beach, Virginia. FYI, he HAS reincarnated and is right now back on Earth and is very much alive today. Please visit my website for the link to his website.) My friends told me that Dave was truly a gifted psychic. Just like Edgar Cayce, Dave can tell a person what the source or cause of his/her ailment is. The reading is done over the telephone, and afterwards, Dave intuitively prescribes/advises what vitamins and/or herbs to take to heal the ailment. At first, when I heard about Dave, I was a skeptic. I knew nothing about this man, but at the same time, I was willing to try any 47

alternative treatment to avoid foot surgery. “Anyway,” I told myself, “I don’t have much to lose. The consultation is only $25.” So I called Dave’s store and made an appointment for February 1, 2001 at 4:00 p.m. By the day of my appointment, I was now looking forward to learning more about this man and hearing what he had to say. Steadfast, though, I was determined not to give him any clues or answer any questions regarding my health, especially about my foot problem. He would have to tell me and prove to me that he was genuine. I called Dave at exactly 4:00 p.m., on February 1. Surprisingly, not even waiting for an introduction, Dave immediately “tuned in” to my problem. The first words out of his mouth were, “I’m getting that you have a foot problem.” Amazed, I answered, “Yes, I do.” He then pinpointed what exactly was wrong, “It’s not your foot; it’s your spleen.” As I sat quietly on the other end of the line listening, I was impressed with his ability as an intuitive. There is no way he could have known about my foot problem. After the consultation was over, we talked. He then started channeling again. For as long as I live, I will never forget the following message that Dave channeled to me: Dave caught me off guard by asking me, “Do you know you are chosen?” The word “chosen” made me feel uncomfortable, so I answered, “No, I didn’t.” He then said, “It’s an honor to meet you,” and I immediately reciprocated by saying, “My gosh! It’s an honor to meet you!” Then Dave began to channel again, and this time the real message started coming through. “In the year 2003, Death will walk the Earth, and you will tell people where to go to be safe.” As he was saying these words, I started “freaking” out. Scaring the padookies out of me, I began questioning God (in my mind), “Why are you telling me this? I don’t want to know this!” When Dave finally finished, he asked me if I knew what the message meant, and I said, ”No I don’t. Do you?” Then he said, “No, I don’t either.” We talked a little bit more, and then he said he would mail me the vitamins. When I got off the phone, I began wondering what in the world would be happening in two years for me to be telling people where to go to be safe? I wondered, “Is there going to be a nuclear


war?” For the life of me, I couldn’t figure out what the message meant. That same day, while the message was still fresh in my mind, I told several friends and family members about the message/prophecy. I did this just in case it would come true and then I would have witnesses. Later that week, when I received the vitamins from Dave, I followed his instructions and took them religiously. Amazingly, within one month’s time, Dave’s vitamins worked. The vitamins cleaned out my spleen, and the excruciating pain in my feet disappeared. From that moment on, I was a believer in Dave. AUTHOR’S NOTE: If you would like more information about Dave or would like to contact him, please visit my website



Chapter 12

The Birth of the Angel Children March 2001

An opportunity is like an outhouse. Just when you’re looking for one, they seem few and far between. Since the fall of 2000, I had made several more friends at the Soul Esteem Center. Near the end of March 2001, one of my new friends Betty asked me if I would like to go with her to a holistic/psychic fair. She said there was one right after church that very Sunday afternoon. I told her, “Yes, I’d love to!” I had never experienced a psychic fair before, and once again, you know by now that I love to get readings. When we arrived at the fair, I told Betty I wanted to get a reading, but I didn’t know how to pick out a psychic, and there were also too many to choose from. Betty suggested that I just walk around and sit down with one I felt comfortable with. I did just that and ended up with a Tarot card reader by the name of Shirley. Shirley, at first, didn’t have much to say, until suddenly, without any warning, she began scolding me saying, “You had an invention once! How come you never did anything with it?” Her question gave me goose bumps. I immediately thought her question could have been accidental or maybe even a coincidence, so I didn’t answer her. (Note: The fact of the matter is that what Shirley said was true. I did invent something 20 years ago and didn’t do anything with it.) In the early 1980's, I had designed (invented) patterns for softstuffed fabric dolls that sucked a thumb or a pacifier. Most of my doll patterns were animals, though, and I had just one girl pattern. All of the dolls were 18" tall and wore clothes, diapers, shoes, and socks. I sold many finished and undressed dolls at craft shows, where people went absolutely wild over them. Because they were so different and were one-of-a-kind, people literally fought over them. I also wholesaled my doll patterns to craft shops all over the country. Sadly, just when I was getting started, I had to quit and get out of the business because of my divorce in 1986.


Now, almost twenty years later I had long forgotten about the patterns and the dolls. But fortunately I had never gotten rid of the original artwork for the patterns. They were still safely stored away down in my basement. Now, Shirley got my mind to stirring. I sat through the rest of the reading in silence, wondering what spirit was really trying to tell me. For one moment, an explanation did pop up in my mind, “Is God trying to tell me to manufacture my dolls to finance my ministry?” I then quickly blew this off, reminding myself of the horror stories I had heard in the 1980's, when I was a vendor in wholesale trade shows. I had talked to many people, and their stories were all the same: A small-time entrepreneur attempts to by-pass the big wholesalers and do business directly with the manufacturers in the Far East. They try skipping the middle man to save money but end up getting burned instead. They usually lost their shirts and consequently learned an expensive lesson. After hearing this, I vowed this would never ever happen to me and decided I would never attempt to do this myself. Conclusion: The little guy doesn’t stand a chance against these giants. After my reading with Shirley was over, I didn’t mention to anyone, even Betty, what Shirley had brought up. I still wasn’t sure myself if her question was legitimate or just a coincidence. To be certain, though, I would ask for a confirmation. So when I got home that afternoon, I decided to try out what I had learned in Sedona–to use the power of intent to manifest something I wanted or needed. I made a promise to myself, however, that I would keep this request a secret. I didn’t want to be embarrassed in front of my friends if it did not manifest. So first, I made sure I was alone. Then I stood in the middle of my livingroom and dramatically raised my eyes and arms to the Heavens. Speaking directly to God and to my angels I said, “Okay, I have no samples. How can I get samples? Thank you.” I laughed as I thought this was going to be a tough order to fill. Actually, I had no samples (finished dolls) anymore. “Good luck!” I told them. “The ball is in your court now. It would literally take a miracle for you to manifest this.” (Note: Was I in for a big surprise! It would only be a matter of a few days before my request was dropped right into my lap!) A few days later on April 1, my mother and father came back from Yuma, Arizona, where they spent the winters. By now, they were in 52

their late 70's, and my father was disabled from Parkinson’s Disease. Since he was steadily getting worse, my parents had decided that this would be their last winter in Arizona. So they packed up their treasures and said good-bye to their friends in Yuma for the last time and came back home to Kirkwood, Missouri to stay. The day after they came back, I paid them a visit to welcome them home. When my mother told me she had brought me back something from Yuma, I got excited. She then told me to sit down and wait while she went back to her bedroom to get it. As I sat on the couch wondering what it was, I figured out she must have brought me back something from Mexico. (Note: I was wrong again, and I was in for another shock!) When she came out of the bedroom, to my surprise, she was carrying my thumb-sucking lamb doll. As she handed it to me, she apologized for returning it. She then explained that she just didn’t have any room to store it in their small condo. As I sat there stunned, staring down at the lamb in my lap, I went into denial. Usually, I would have responded with a “thank you,” but this time the words didn’t come to me. I was dumbfounded. “Could this be the manifestation I had asked for?” I would have loved it to be, but my mind kept saying, “No! Don’t believe it! It’s another coincidence!” I then reminded myself that my mom and dad were bringing it back from Yuma anyway . I finally let myself off the hook by telling myself, “No, Linda, this is definitely just another coincidence.” By nature, I am a very conservative person and not a risk taker. However, as I was driving home, I still had hopes, but I also kept thinking about all those poor people who got “burned.” When I finally did get home, I found myself still wishing and wondering. I wholeheartedly wanted to believe what might be happening was real. And I definitely didn’t want to miss out on an opportunity like this one, but the risk was too great. Even though my heart was in it, my mind kept saying, “No! Don’t believe it. This is too risky. It’s just a coincidence!” So to settle it once and for all, before I would move on it or forget all about it, l would give God and my angels one more chance. I would get another confirmation. At that moment, I got an idea. One of the last conversations I’d had with Mary-Margareht was when she told me to call her if I ever got “stuck.” Well, I was stuck. So that night I picked up the phone and 53

dialed her number. To my surprise, instead of getting her answering machine, she answered the telephone herself. I greeted her, “Hello, Mary-Margareht, this is Linda from St. Louis. Do you remember me?” She answered, “Yes, Linda, I remember you.” (Note: Mary-Margareht couldn’t have had a clue as to what was going on in my life at that time, so right away, I put her to the test.) The following was our conversation: “Mary-Margareht, what’s going on in my life right now?” She didn’t even pause before she answered, “Your angels are telling me that you invented this 20 years ago, and the world wasn’t ready for it then, but now it is.” (So it was true. It wasn’t a series of coincidences after all!) Mary-Margareht then continued, “There will be three sets of people. The first set of people will be a learning experience. The second set of people will take you to the third, and the third set of people will manufacture it.” I thanked her and then hung up the phone. Now I had something to get excited about! “Oh boy,” I told myself, “this manifesting business is easy–a piece of cake!” Later, I tried to think of who that second “set” of people might be, who would lead me to the third set of people who would then manufacture my doll. I then remembered my ex-boyfriend (in Plano) talking about acquaintances of his who owned a toy store in St. Louis. My ex-boyfriend had said that every year they went to the annual New York City toy show, and they knew ALL of the toy manufacturers. “Oh my God! These toy store owners MUST be that second set of people,” I told myself. “Thank goodness! I can skip that learning experience!” The next day, I looked up their phone number. I then called and spoke to one of the owners, himself, who sounded very nice and seemed willing to see me and give me some advice. He agreed to meet with me, and we made an appointment for the next week. I was now “busting my buttons.” This was going to be so easy! My angels were right. All I had to do was show up! I took off work the day of the appointment and arrived at the toy store right on time. At that moment, I felt invincible and thought the world was mine. I had a sample of my dolls, and I believed everything was going to be smooth sailing from there on out. (Note: Wrong again, Linda! I didn’t know it, but I was walking right into an ambush. And was I in for a rude awakening!) When I sat down with the toy store owner in his office, he took one 54

look at my lamb and sarcastically said, “Big deal! Lots of dolls suck their thumbs. What you need is stories!” I tried to interrupt him to explain, “But....but.....but,” but he wouldn’t let me. Just like a drill sergeant straightening out a new recruit, he quickly put me in my place. Unbeknownst to me, he was just warming up when he asked, “Do you have a marketing plan?” “No,” I responded. Setting the trap, he then asked, “Do you have a business plan?” “No,” I admitted. Beginning to squirm in my seat, I finally realized where this conversation was heading. That’s when I started wishing he would just shoot me and put me out of my misery and let me go home! But, no, he wasn’t finished with me yet! Before I was excused, his instructions were explicit: (1) Go home and write a marketing plan and a business plan, (2) write some stories, and then (3) come back and see me! Mercy! Thank God, the meeting was now over, and I was dismissed. Feeling totally humiliated, there was nothing left for me to do, except pick up my things, get up from the chair and head for the door. As I was walking out, reality sank in. “Boy, am I stupid,” I told myself. “I must have appeared to be a real idiot to this guy!” Then just before getting into my car, I stopped in my tracks as I remembered what my angels had said (through Mary-Margareht) earlier. Realizing the joke was on me and also seeing the irony of it all, I started laughing (at myself). Basically, all I could do at this point was roll my eyes, slowly shake my head and laugh, as I acknowledged (to God and to my angels), “Oh well, so much for that learning experience!” And with that, I got in the car and drove home. But it was far from over. When I walked in the door, of course, the phone was ringing off the wall. Like a dummy, I had “spilled the beans” and told everyone about the three sets of people. Now everyone, including my friends and relatives, were calling to find out if I was a millionaire yet. At that moment, I was too embarrassed to talk to anyone. So, instead, I just flopped down on the livingroom couch and let the phone keep on ringing. As I lay there, I thought about all the work that would be required on my part. I would have to write stories, find an illustrator, write a business plan, write a marketing plan, and God knows what else. I began scolding myself, “Linda, see what you got yourself into? How are you going to do all this and hold down a job, too?” At that moment, I felt deflated, but as I lay there, I started giving myself a pep talk. “Remember? You’re Linda and you’re not a quitter! 55

If you say you’re gonna do something, you do it!” What a drama queen I am! I then got up and looked up at the ceiling (to Heaven) and dramatically shook my fist at both God and my angels. Accepting the challenge, I declared, “I’m not a quitter. I’m gonna do it!” Lying in bed that night, I tried to think of ways to tie in my animals to stories, but nothing came to me. However, the next morning, as I stood in front of the bathroom mirror brushing my hair, the stories started pouring in! As I stared into the mirror, I exclaimed, “It’s not about animals! It’s about children–angel children! They’re guardian angels!” Now, the longer I stared into the mirror, the more the stories kept coming through. Then it came to me. “My doll! It’s all about my girl doll! She’s the Angel Children’s angel doll who sucks her thumb! That’s it! I got it! She’s the Angel Children’s doll!” Through the years, I have learned that brand name recognition means everything. I knew “The Angel Children” would be a great trademark for children’s books and the doll, but was the name available? Or was it already a registered trademark that someone else owned? I couldn’t stand the suspense. I had to find out. So that same evening I got on the Internet and visited the United States Patent and Trademark Office website. I typed in the word “angel” in their database search engine. Amazingly, the results came back with over 2,500 registered trademarks using the word “angel.” Now I had something to be nervous about. Everything depended on my getting this trademark, but deep down inside I was pessimistic. The word “angel” was common and appeared to be very popular, and there were over 2,500 “angel” trademarks registered already. I prepared myself for the worst scenario. Then, one-by-one, I slowly began scrolling down the entire list of 2,500 angel trademarks, starting at the beginning. When finished, to my surprise, there was no registered trademark listed for “Angel Children,” but that still didn’t convince me. I told myself I could have made a mistake. I might have overlooked it, because it was a long tedious chore going through all 2,500 trademarks. So, just to be sure, I checked the entire “angel” database one more time. Finished and still coming up empty handed, I could now breathe a sigh of relief. There was definitely no registered trademark listed for “Angel Children.” Feeling that the battle was half won, I now focused all my attention on “tweaking” the doll pattern. (Note: Originally, my girl pattern was not an angel. She was plump and had straight yarn hair.) So the next 56

evening, I went down to my basement and rummaged through the patterns until I found her. I then got my sewing machine out and for the next several weeks, worked on improving the pattern. Every night I came home from work and spent hours working on her. It was a slow, tedious process, because I am a perfectionist. Many nights I stayed up until midnight going to bed tired, only to find myself having to get up four hours later to go to work. I wouldn’t give up, though. Because I was determined to come up with the perfect angel doll. At last, I was satisfied with what I had created. The doll’s body and face looked entirely different than the original pattern. My new doll was thinner and had curly hair. She was adorable! Her face was sweet and sucking her thumb made her absolutely irresistible. Now, the only thing left to do was design her wings. This, however, proved to be a challenge! I didn’t want “fairy” wings or “dragonfly” wings, nor did I want the wings to be too big. But after days of laboring over it, I still hadn’t come up with the perfect angel wings. Then, one night as I was sitting at my sewing machine, I was reminiscing about the night in Sedona when I saw my first angel. Suddenly, a light went on in the attic, as I got an idea. “That’s it! Why didn’t I think of this before? The Sedona angel’s wings are the perfect shape and size!” At last, I had the perfect model to design the perfect wings! By late April, I finally had a prototype that I was happy with. I was now ready to find that second set of people who would lead me to the third set of people, and then the doll would be manufactured!



Chapter 13

Be Careful What You Wish For! May 2001

Wishing is like fishing. What you catch depends on what kind of bait you use and how you cast out your line. So be careful of what you hope to tackle, and don’t be surprised if you need a larger boat, because you may be reeling in something far bigger than you ever expected to net. For on the end of that hook may be your worst nightmare–Moby Dick! By May I still had not found that second set of people. I was really pushing it–trying to make it happen all by myself by looking for them everywhere I went. That same month, I took three other friends, Portia, Rita and Paul, to Sedona. I was excited about what was manifesting in my life, and chomping at the bit to get another reading to find out what my angels had to say. When we arrived in Sedona, right away, I scheduled a session with Mary-Margareht. During the session, Mary-Mrgareht explained to me, that I was pushing too hard to make it happen–trying to “force” the energy myself. She told me that I was actually pushing the energy away from me. She added that I needed to just release it, and let the Universe bring it to me. During the reading, I asked if “The Angel Children” would be the trademark for my children’s books, and Mary-Margareht said, “Your angels are saying that yes, ‘The Angel Children’ will be your trademark.” Hearing this, made me feel very secure. That night, my friends and I attended the Monday night session at the Foundation with Gabriel, who channeled angels. One by one, we each got a turn. When it was my turn to sit in the middle of the circle, I asked Gabriel. “Is The Angel Children going to be my trademark?” Gabriel then said, “Your angels are saying the name is going to change.” Immediately, I thought Gabriel must have made a mistake or heard wrong! Confused, I blurted out, “But...but....but....they said earlier....” and then I stopped. I now didn’t know quite what to say or think. 59

Again, I questioned Gabriel, if he had heard them correctly, but Gabriel just shrugged his shoulders and said, “That’s what they’re telling me.” Then, changing the subject, I asked Gabriel, “Am I going to be on Oprah?” Gabriel then said that they were asking, “Are you SURE you want to be on Oprah?” Answering the question with an affirmation, I declared, “Yes! I AM going to be on Oprah!” Gabriel then said that they were asking, “Are you sure you want to be in the spotlight?” Again, I answered with an affirmation, “Yes!”

Unfortunately, my time was now up. There were others still waiting their turn. and Gabriel had to move on. For the rest of the evening, though, I was puzzled, asking myself over and over, “What do they mean, the name will change?” I reminded myself that earlier 60

that same day Mary-Margareht had definitely assured me that my angels said it would be “The Angel Children.” Finally, I had to put an end to this and somehow believe someone, so I chose Mary-Margareht. But while sitting on the plane returning to St. Louis, Gabriel’s words were still haunting me. Now I was having doubts all over again. I had to resolve this matter once and for all. Who was right–Gabriel or Mary-Margareht? Finally, I decided that it had to be Mary-Margareht, and from that moment on, I dismissed all thoughts about the name ever changing again. By June, I still had not found that second set of people, but I had released it to the Universe and believed it would happen. I knew that I just had to be patient and let the Universe bring it to me. Now having enough confidence to move forward, though, I decided to go ahead and register the trademark “The Angel Children.” First, I called my lawyer, Harvey, and he set up an LLC for me. Then he referred me to Annette, a patent and trademark lawyer, who could take care of the registration. Harvey accompanied me to my first meeting with Annette, and I brought the angel doll along, thinking there would be no problems getting the “The Angel Children” trademarked. (Note: Just when I least expect it, of course, the unexpected always happens!) Annette proved to be very knowledgeable but immediately lowered the boom. She informed me that The Angel Children was too weak a trademark, and the words were too common. She then added that I needed something unique, but I was certain that she was mistaken. While Annette was talking, I kept trying to interrupt her to explain, “but....but....but, ” but that was all I could get in. Annette finished by saying, “The Angel Children will be okay, but you need a stronger trademark for the doll.” Afterwards, Harvey and I went out to the parking lot and stood by my car to discuss the meeting. I just didn’t get it. My angels said it would definitely be “The Angel Children.” Now here’s this trademark lawyer telling me I had to come up with a new name. While Harvey and I stood there, I started saying different phrases out loud. “Little Angel Thumb Sucker?” “Nah– sounds nasty!” Other names popped up, too, but they just didn’t sound right either. Finally, the name “Little Angel Thumbs” came to me. Harvey thought it sounded pretty good, and I thought so, too. So it was decided. I would call Annette the next day and tell her the good news, that the doll’s 61

name would be “Little Angel Thumbs.” I did call Annette the very next morning to tell her. She said that the doll’s name sounded fine, however, she would have to do some research and get back with me by the end of the week. That same day at work, I told Portia about the meeting with Annette, at which time Portia burst out laughing saying, “Linda, don’t you remember? Gabriel said the name would change. He was right, but Mary-Margareht was right, too! The name did stay the same!” At once, the memory of that evening in Sedona came back to me. I had forgotten all about it, and what Portia said was true. I now realized my angels had played another trick on me, and I had fallen for it hook, line and sinker. (Note: I guess I just have to stop trying to outguess them, because I never am right.) At that moment, I looked up at the ceiling (Heaven) and just threw my arms up in the air and said, “I give up! How in the heck do they keep knowing these things are going to happen long before they even happen?” Trying to keep a straight face, Portia looked at me, smiled and just shrugged her shoulders, at which time we both burst out laughing. By the end of the year, both trademarks were registered under my LLC, and “The Angel Children” and “Little Angel Thumbs” belonged to me! AUTHOR’S NOTE: If I would have been really smart, I would have asked my angels that night in Sedona, “Hey......wait a minute! What do I have to do to get on Oprah?”



Chapter 14

I Smell a Rat! June 2001

Given time, something bad will always turn into something good. June 2001 marked the beginning of an experience that would forever change my life. A friend called me one Saturday afternoon and asked if I would go to a dance with her that evening. I told her no, saying I was too tired from doing yard work all day, but she wouldn’t take no for an answer. Finally, I agreed, but I had no idea what to expect. I had not been to a dance in over 15 years. However, I was glad I did, because that night I met the man of my dreams. His name was Joe, and he was tall, dark, and handsome. Just like in a fairy tale, he was charming and literally swept me off my feet. Although we were not of “like” mind, I was crazy about him. However, life wasn’t a bed of roses for Joe. Joe had just gone through a nasty divorce the preceding year and now despised his exwife. Compounding the situation, had just broken up with a girlfriend whom he now hated, too. And to make matters even worse, he expressed hatred and contempt towards his own mother! His anger towards women should have been a warning to me. But instead, for the first time in my life I was in love and threw all caution to the wind. By the end of summer, we had become intimate. Sadly to say, we didn’t get to see each other as much as I would have liked to, because he was busy with his two children every other weekend. Closing in on mid-September, I had not seen or heard from him in two weeks. Then on September 15, he called and suggested I come over and spend the night, Sunday, at his house. He told me to bring my overnight bag, and in the morning, I could go straight to work from his house. With this invitation, I felt as if I had died and gone to Heaven! I was thrilled at the thought of seeing him again, so I enthusiastically said, “Yes!” He then told me to come over around 6:30 Sunday night, at which time he would be taking his children home. I was so excited! From the moment I hung up the phone, I began counting the hours until we would be together again. As I was packing my bag Sunday afternoon, I felt on top of the 65

world. Here I was going to be with the man I loved, and I was sure he felt the same way about me. I was so eager to be on my way that I walked out the door way ahead of time. (It never occurred to me that I would arrive at his house 20 minutes too early.) When I pulled up in front of his house at 6:10 and walked in the door, Joe and his daughter were the only ones there. His son was missing. Odd, neither one greeted me, and immediately I could feel the tension. They didn’t even try to hide their resentment. I assumed it was because I had arrived early and had interrupted their time together. Even though his daughter and I had met before, I thought she had accepted me, but I had guessed wrong. Again, Joe and his daughter didn’t even acknowledge me. In fact, they ignored me, pretending I wasn’t even there. Then at 6:30 without even bothering to say good-bye, they walked out the door, got in his car, and drove off. The rest of the evening was the same–a total fiasco. In the morning, I left for work, and around nine o’clock I received a phone cal from Joe. We said our hellos, and then I said something I would usually never have the nerve to say. My feelings were hurt, and I felt I had been treated unkindly the night before. There was no anger in my heart as I told him how I felt, “You know, last night you treated me just like a hooker.” With sarcasm in his voice, he immediately snapped back, “Well, you were early, and I had schedules.” Maybe to someone else, this nasty remark would not have been offensive, but to me, Joe’s words stabbed me like a knife right through my heart. Between last night’s fiasco and now this cruel remark, the veil was lifted. At that moment, I realized that all along his intentions had been dishonorable and he had only used me. Devastated, my entire world, including my self-esteem, began to crumble. My chest suddenly felt as if a hundred-pound weight had been dropped on it. I don’t even remember my response to his cruel remark. All I remember is hanging up the phone. I didn’t cry nor was I angry. I was numb. Never in my life had I been treated like this or felt this bad. Here, I had given my heart to someone, and he had stomped on it. If there was such a thing as a broken heart, I had one. Later, as I sat in my cubicle, I tore up his pictures and threw them in the trash. I then deleted all of his e-mails and decided to never see or speak to him again. Funny, my wishes came true. He, too, must have felt the same way, because he never called me again. 66



Chapter 15

Searching for the Answer–Why? December 2001

If sailing through troubled waters, be brave and never abandon ship, for following every storm appears a rainbow on the horizon. Within three days of the phone call, I started getting aches and pains in my joints and muscles. At the same time, I thought it was just the flu coming on. During that same time period, I had decided to take a walk at lunch. Usually, I walk a mile in less than twelve minutes, but this time I couldn’t even walk one short block before becoming too fatigued to go on. Therefore, I had to turn around and go back. When I got back to my desk, I was exhausted. I knew something was seriously wrong, so I called my doctor’s office and made an appointment. During the visit, my internist ordered blood tests, which included tests for Lyme, lupus, and rheumatoid arthritis. Exactly one week later, my doctor called me with the test results informing me all the tests came back negative. But by the end of that same week, the symptoms worsened. Not only was I experiencing terrible pain in my joints and muscles, but I now could not even walk ten feet without experiencing severe fatigue. Again, I called my internist. Out of frustration, he made it clear that he couldn’t do anything more for me. He suggested I find another doctor. So on October 1, out of desperation and looking for an answer, I called the only person I trusted and could turn to–Dave in New York. This time, when Dave got on the phone, I didn’t even say “hello.” Instead, I cried out, “What is wrong with me?” Not even pausing, he asked, “You had an emotional trauma recently, didn’t you?” I answered, “Yes, I did......on September 17.” Dave then said, “This caused you to get a virus in your spine.” (Note: He later would refer to this virus as the “Stealth” virus.) I didn’t even question him. I believed him. He said he would send me vitamins, but this time, however, when I took the vitamins, they didn’t help. The symptoms didn’t go away. Fortunately, I had a safety net. If I didn’t get well soon, I would be 69

able to receive short-term disability, but I was still in a dilemma. I needed to find a doctor who would “sign off” on the disability papers. I had to find a new one, because my internist had literally told me to “get lost.” It was now the first week in October, and I was still in pain and experiencing overwhelming fatigue. I was so sick, that I couldn’t work. My vacation and sick leave had just run out, too. I then started calling every rheumatoid arthritis specialist on my health insurance plan. No luck! Every specialist on the list was booked solid through the end of the year. I was facing an emergency. I couldn’t wait. I needed to find a doctor ASAP, who would sign off on my disability paperwork. Only then, could I start receiving disability payments to pay my bills. It was almost mid-October and by this time, I was living on savings and “plastic.” Frustrated, I still had not gotten an appointment with a new doctor. In the meantime, believe it or not, my symptoms got worse. Now, huge, painful boils began forming under my right armpit, and I had a high fever. I needed a doctor now, but I didn’t know where to go or who to turn to. Finally, out of desperation, I went to a hospital emergency room on Sunday, October 13, at 2:30 p.m. With a high fever and in excruciating pain (from the boils), I was delirious. Fortunately, I was the only patient there that afternoon, and the emergency room doctor saw me right away. It appeared that this doctor was not anxious to lance my boils, because he took one look at them and told me to burst them myself at home. He instructed me to put a wet washcloth in the microwave, get it steaming hot, and then apply the hot washcloth to the boils until they burst. I then explained to the doctor my situation and asked him if he knew of a rheumatoid arthritis specialist. He must have felt guilty or sorry for me, because he immediately got on the phone and called a specialist he knew. He told the specialist about me, and the specialist agreed to see me that Tuesday, October 15. As I was leaving the hospital, I told myself that something at last was going my way. The trip to the emergency room had paid off. Although the doctor did not lance my boils, I did get an appointment to see a rheumatoid arthritis specialist. And even though I was still


very sick, I felt blessed. At last I had found a doctor who could sign off on my disability papers, and I would be able to pay my bills When I got home from the emergency room, I was now faced with another dilemma–bursting my own boils. I did just as the emergency room doctor had instructed. I kept applying scalding hot wet wash cloths to the boils, until they finally reached the size of jaw breakers and burst. Instantly, the pain from the boils and the fever diminished. October 15 could not have come any sooner. When I arrived at the doctor’s office, I was still very sick and in terrible pain. More painful boils had appeared under my right armpit. Walking was now a problem. I was so unsteady on my feet that I had to hold onto something to keep my balance. I thought to myself, “How could this be happening to me in just a matter of three weeks? This “Stealth” virus is killing me!” This new doctor took one pitiful look at me and slowly shook her head. She told me she had never seen such a severe case of rheumatoid arthritis (RA) come on so fast. I questioned her diagnosis, saying that my tests had come back negative for RA. She disagreed. She explained that 20 percent of RA patients’ test results come back negative. I then told her I thought it was a virus attacking me. She shook her head no. (Of course, why would she believe me? I couldn’t tell her about Dave, the psychic. She would think I was crazy.) She then gave me a full examination and prescribed steroids and immune suppressing drugs. During the examination, I asked her what was causing the painful boils under my armpit, and she responded, “Probably an in-grown hair.” She actually turned out to be very kind and filled out my paperwork, too. As I left, I thanked her for seeing me on such short notice. As I was driving home from her office, I finally felt “safe.” I was now under the care of a specialist, whom I believed would get me well. At that moment, I believed that whatever was happening, God was in control, and He would somehow get me out of this “mess.” My financial situation was now looking better. Even though I had no savings left in the bank, the disability insurance would soon “kick in.” I just had to be patient and hang in there. Almost immediately, the high dose of steroids reduced the inflammation in my joints, but I then had to deal with its side effects. Within a month, I gained 20 pounds. Also, the warning labels on the 71

prescription label frightened me. The word “death” struck fear in my heart. Even though I was still quite ill, I had already planned a trip with seven of my friends to go back to Sedona that December. Not wanting to cancel it, I decided to go. Besides, I wanted to see my friends again at the Earth, Mother, Father Foundation. I also had hopes that maybe they could give me the answer as to why I had gotten sick. The month of December finally arrived, and we all flew out together. In Sedona, my friends and I attended the activities at the Foundation every night. Some of us even had readings with MaryMargareht. The Thursday evening activity at the Earth, Mother, Father Foundation was especially important to me. A woman by the name of Marla was channeling. When it was my turn to sit in the center and receive messages, one of the questions I asked was why I got sick. Marla channeled to me that the reason I got sick was to heal myself. This made absolutely no sense to me. Why would I want to get sick just to heal myself? Besides, no one has ever been cured of RA. Unfortunately, all I could do was accept the message at that time. I had to believe Marla. She seemed authentic and she had no clue about me or my present illness. Near the end of her channeling, I asked Marla if they (meaning spirit) would tell me more, but she answered, “No, that’s all they will tell me.” That night I left the Foundation very disappointed. That same week, I became very ill during a ceremony. Later, my friends told me my skin had turned “ashen gray.” I then told them I had felt as if I were going to faint. What a vacation this had turned out to be! I had to spend the majority of the week on the couch in the condo. The painful boils had reappeared under my right armpit. I also had a high fever and was miserable. When it was time to go, I had no regrets about leaving Sedona. I just wanted to “get out of Dodge” and go home. I had found no answer in Sedona as to why this was happening to me. 72

Chapter 16

I’m Just Dying to Get Better! 2002

WARNING! Asking God for the “full experience” may be hazardous to your health. In 2000, I told my friend Betty that I had asked God for the full experience. In disbelief, she looked at me and said, “You asked for the full experience?” Not realizing what I had done, I proudly answered, “Yes!” She reacted by just rolling her eyes and slowly shaking her head, for she fully understood the consequences of what I had asked for. It seems as if whenever I am in need or in danger, the “right” person always walks into my life. In late December, that person turned out to be Bob Morton. When Bob and I were first introduced, we were attracted to each other like magnets. Unlike Joe and me, Bob and I were of “like” mind, meaning we shared many of the same beliefs. Later on, Bob proved to be a saint and my guardian angel. He must have really cared about me, because every night he drove over 40 miles round trip to come out and take care of me. Since I could never sleep, Bob would come over late and fix meals for me, then we would spend the rest of the night talking. We discussed many topics ranging from Atlantis, to the origins of the Bible, and then the Illuminati. I never got tired of listening to him, because I had never met anyone as intelligent or as fascinating as Bob. He had been a world traveler and was also a member of Mensa. He proudly wore a medal on a gold chain around his neck which he said he had won by taking first place in a nationwide Mensa contest. We only had one difference of opinion–what Dave (the psychic) had said was attacking me (a virus). Bob disagreed. He blamed my illness on the medication I was taking. Bob would re-enforce how important it was for me to build my immune system instead of suppressing it. Now I was beginning to agree with Bob that my only chance for survival was to protect and build my immune system instead of destroying it. I now realized I had to find a different doctor who offered an alternative treatment than immune-suppressing drugs. 73

By March 2002, (without my doctor’s approval) I weaned myself off of the steroids. Now my immune system kicked in and was functioning, but this proved to be devastating. All these past months, the drugs had been masking what was really going on in my body. Now, to my horror, the terrible damage the “monster” had done was revealed to me. I cried when I saw what happened to my hands. I couldn’t make a fist, because they were too swollen and stiff. My hands looked like lobster claws, and my feet were swollen, too. In fact, I was unable to even wear shoes. I had to wear flip-flops. I also had neuropathy in both my feet and my hands. By now, I was experiencing chronic pain. Even rolling over in bed was excruciatingly painful. My only relief was to lie perfectly still, flat on my back, with my arms straight at my side. Then almost every night, I would wake up drenched in sweat, cold and shivering with my bed sheets “soaking wet.” (Note: This was from low grade fevers breaking, and this would go on for months and months.) Most of the other time, I couldn’t sleep. Even if I were exhausted and wanted to sleep, I couldn’t. From lack of sleep, dark circles began appearing under my eyes. I had also reached the point where I lost interest in food. Not long afterwards from not eating, my body began to slowly waste away, and I looked as if I had AIDS. Even though I didn’t realize it at the time, I was also experiencing severe depression. Looking back, I can honestly describe what severe depression feels like. It’s losing interest in everything around you. Surprisingly, TV couldn’t even hold my attention. Nothing but a fire lit under me could motivate or arouse me. The following scenario best describes what severe depression felt like to me: A man walks up to me and points a gun at me and says he’s going to kill me. I then beg him to do it. I tell him he’d be doing me a favor. As the weeks rolled by, I kept canceling my appointments with my doctor. I was a coward and afraid of what she would say when she saw the inflammation and the damage to my joints. She would know immediately what I had done–that I had stopped taking the drugs. She would then “hit the roof.” After getting off the drugs, and seeing what the “monster” had really done, I was fearful I was going to die unless something short of


a miracle happened. That’s when I made an appointment to see my father’s pain doctor. When I saw the pain doctor for the first time, he took one look at my hands and said, “I can see that you have nerve damage.” The doctor ordered lots of tests to try to find out what was causing my symptoms. Thank goodness he did not believe in prescribing unnecessary drugs, until he could find out the cause of my symptoms. At that time, he only prescribed pain medication. He ordered nerve and muscle tests, an MRI of my brain, and blood tests. The results of the nerve and muscle tests revealed that I had muscle and myelin sheath damage. The MRI revealed that I had lesions and cysts in the right frontal lobe of my brain. (See Exhibit 2, Medical Records.) Overall, the results from the tests stumped the doctor. He and his staff were baffled and couldn’t figure out what exactly was causing my symptoms. They admitted they couldn’t attach a name to it. At that time, the pain doctor referred me to a “top” neurologist in the St. Louis area, which proved to be both good and bad news. The bad news was the first available appointment was in November, which was over six months away. The good news was that I was not going to be forced to take immune-suppressing drugs for awhile. This meant I could try to keep building my immune system to fight what I believed was really attacking me–the “Stealth” virus. For the next 12 weeks, I had physical therapy three times a week to strengthen the muscles in my arms and legs. My fingers were useless. I couldn’t even button my shirt or grasp a zipper to zip up my pants. I could not even turn a door knob to open a door. I needed assistance to walk, and I used a wheelchair or walker whenever I went outside. While this was all going on, Bob was still by my side. At night, when we were together, my teeth would chatter and I would shake uncontrollably from the pain, the chills and the fever. The pain pills didn’t help. I’m sure Bob felt helpless. All he could do was hold me in his arms and comfort me. Here I was the one who was so sick, but I felt sorry for him. He was watching someone he cared about waste away right in front of him, and there was nothing he could do. Now I realize Bob must have really loved me, because he refused to leave St. Louis and abandon me. (Note: During this time period, jobs were scarce, and Bob was self-employed. The only good paying 75

jobs were out of town.) I didn’t know it then, but Bob was in a “pinch.” His savings were running out, but he never let me know. Looking back, I now know that he had made a big sacrifice for me when he chose to stay in St. Louis to take care of me. Then November came around, and my long-awaited appointment with the neurologist was finally here. All of us, including my family, believed this prominent doctor would have the answers. My sister, who was a nurse, went with me to my appointment, because we thought she would better understand what the doctor had to say. On the day of the appointment, though, I had a premonition that the office visit was going to be a disappointment. Unfortunately, I was right. The long-awaited appointment started off with a resident interviewing me. He turned out to be very unsympathetic and arrogant, because the first words out of his mouth were, “You’re wasting our time. You’re a classic case of rheumatoid arthritis!” His diagnosis made me angry, and I fired back, “How dare you say this, after I waited seven months to be here!” I just couldn’t believe this doctor’s insolence. Frustrated, I wanted to scream at him, “Didn’t you read my medical history? I have lesions in my brain! I have nerve damage! How can you tell me I have rheumatoid arthritis without even examining me?” We were definitely starting off on the wrong foot. The resident then began to scold me, because I wouldn’t take immune-suppressing drugs. Using a scare tactic approach, he predicted, “You’re going to die if you don’t take drugs!” By now, I was madder than a hornet, and I snapped back, “I would rather die this way than your way!” Obviously, this interview was going nowhere. I was acting like a brat, and the resident was just as guilty. Making matters worse, I told him I believed I was being attacked by a virus. Hearing this, he just sat back in his chair and stared at me as if I were “mad.” It’s a good thing patients have rights, because I believe he would have had me committed right then and there and locked up in a psych ward. At last, the neurologist made his “grand” entrance. I became even more disheartened as the neurologist didn’t even acknowledge me. Instead, he immediately proceeded to tap my body parts with a reflex hammer. Thank God the tapping finally stopped, after which I was instructed to go to the x-ray department for some x-rays of my wrists. After that over, I was told to report to the lab to have blood drawn.


In the lab, the technician drew a total of 15 vials of blood from my arm. After the blood work was done, my sister and I left and drove home. What a day this had turned out to be! Even though I was disappointed, I was relieved that this doctor’s appointment was finally over. Once I got home, now more than ever, I had to defend myself. My family was now on the side of the resident and were pressuring me to take immune-suppressing drugs again. I was stubborn and refused to even negotiate or listen. I stood my ground as I told them, “It’s my life and I’ll do with it as I please!” I am not completely stupid, because I did realize I needed help. So who did I turn to? None other than Dave, the one person who could tell me what was REALLY going on. So the next day, November 11, I called him. Dave had not heard from me since October 1, 2001, when he had first told me I was being attacked by the “Stealth” virus. Again, not waiting for Dave to even say hello, I desperately cried out, “What is wrong with me?” Without wasting any time, he said, “You have a virus in your nerves. If it goes to your heart, it will kill you.” By now, I believed in and completely trusted Dave, even more than I trusted Bob or my pain doctor. At this time, Dave was my only hope and my only life line and direct access to God. And I KNEW that God wasn’t going to let me die! AUTHOR’S NOTE: If you are on medication, please do not do what I did. Do not wean yourself off of drugs without professional supervision. This is dangerous. I was lucky and by the grace of God survived to write about it.



Chapter 17

Finally Something to Get Excited About Up until now, my life had been a puzzle. Each piece by itself offered no clue, but when all the pieces were put together, my life’s purpose was finally revealed. Right away, Dave sent me vitamins to build my immune system, so I could fight off what he called the “Stealth” virus. From the moment I received the vitamins in the mail, I followed his directions explicitly. For the next three months, I faithfully took the vitamins and ate a healthy diet. I was determined to destroy this “monster” before it destroyed me. In December 2002, the blood test results from the appointment with the neurologist came back. Their office called and gave me the results over the phone. The radiologist’s report came back “probable arthritis.” Even more amazing, the blood test results revealed that there was absolutely nothing wrong with me! Now my pain doctor was in a “sticky” situation. He had to inform me that I could no longer be under his care. He was not a specialist for what I was being diagnosed with–rheumatoid arthritis. I was devastated by this news, because I liked this doctor very much. Now I had to start all over again and find a new one. Old fears resurfaced. I was afraid I would be forced to take immune-suppressing drugs again. By this time, I was diagnosed as being permanently and 100 percent disabled. I couldn’t work with my hands, and I could only stand for short periods of time. I couldn’t walk without assistance either, and I was still in chronic pain. Again, I was not looking forward to starting all over again with a new doctor. So I made the decision to go back to the female doctor who was first referred to me by the emergency room doctor in October 2001. Since my private disability insurance company was forcing me to apply for Social Security disability benefits, I thought this doctor knew my case and could speed up the process. So with my tail between my legs, I decided to go back to her and called her office to make an appointment. 79

Now I was back to where I started and had to deal with all the red tape again to be approved for Social Security disability. This also meant getting a lawyer and having a doctor fill out more paperwork. In the meantime, an important piece of the puzzle was revealed to me–why I got sick! (Note: I believe there is a purpose for everything.) I didn’t know it at the time that (for the last several months) Bob had been on a mission to find out what was really causing my illness. He had spent hours at home searching the Internet for an answer. Then on February 28, 2003, Bob called me at one o’clock in the morning to give me the news. I could tell by the sound of his voice that he was really excited as he explained he had made a fantastic discovery. Bob said, “Linda, I found it! I’ve found what has been attacking you!” He then explained to me that it was a parasitic-type organism, which was as small as a virus but was not considered a virus. Neither was this organism considered a true bacteria with a cell wall. This organism was in a class of its own. It was called mycoplasma. He explained that what I had was a mycoplasma infection. Suddenly, it became clear to me that my symptoms were like an infection–just like having the flu but worse. This explained the chills and fever in the middle of the night, the boils under my armpit (from infection), and the terrible pain in my joints and muscles. Just as Dave had said, I was being attacked by an organism! Bob said researchers had proven that many of today’s diseases are caused by this organism. Excited, I butted in, “Bob, now I know why I got sick. Remember? The prophecy! Dave said I would go out and tell people where to go to be safe! What he said was true. We’ve got to get out there and tell people about this organism! There are millions of people who are sick and need to know.” Bob, however, didn’t share my enthusiasm, but we spent the rest of the night on the phone as he read to me article after article from many websites, all confirming this organism was the cause of many of today’s diseases. (See Symptoms and Diseases Caused by Mycoplasma.) AUTHOR’S NOTE: This also explains what happened to my son Jeff. Mycoplasma infections are triggered by trauma, and our car accident was definitely a trauma. Within two years of the accident, Jeff went from a healthy normal baby to an uncoordinated “brain fogged” child who was diagnosed with ADD/ADHD by the time he was three. 80

I now call ADD/ADHD a young person’s “soft” version of Alzheimer’s–hyperactivity (fidgeting and in constant motion), unable to concentrate, poor motor skills,“brain fog,” confusion, and poor cognitive skills. Diagnosed ADD/ADHD, my son has experienced all of the same symptoms as Alzheimer’s patients. Jeff says he has no memory of his life before the age of nine, but today, Jeff is happy, working and in good health. Between the age of 12 and 15, we took him off of drugs for ADD/ADHD. Somehow during that time period, his immune system must have “kicked in,” because he no longer suffers from the symptoms of a mycoplasma infection. He is a very intelligent, kind and wonderful human being. Unfortunately, he will always be affected by the damage caused by the mycoplasma, but I could not have asked for a better son!



Chapter 18

A Blessing in Disguise Spring 2003

God is an optimist and so am I! The doctor I had previously abandoned was very kind and didn’t hold any grudges when I returned to her in February 2003. To my dismay, however, no sooner had I come back to her, then suddenly she became ill herself and had to quit her practice. Fortunately, another female doctor “adopted” her patients, including me. In the meantime, I was reading as much information as I could get my hands on about this parasitic organism called mycoplasma. I thought back to when I was in Sedona in December 2001. I remembered getting sicker until I had returned to St. Louis. Now, I understood why I had gotten sicker in Sedona. Mycoplasma flourish in an environment low in oxygen, and Sedona’s altitude is over 4,500 feet above sea level (meaning less oxygen to breathe). On the other hand, the city of St. Louis is just a little over 600 feet above sea level (more oxygen to breathe). Could this then explain why people get altitude sickness, which could be a sign of a mycoplasma infection? According to researchers, this organism also attacks the endocrine system. To replicate, it needs cholesterol for its membrane and where is the best place in the body to find cholesterol? Answer: The endocrine system which is where the body manufactures hormones. (Note: Cholesterol is a key ingredient in hormones.) Now I understood why I couldn’t sleep, why I was depressed, why I was always so cold, and why I would “fly off the handle” at the least little thing that went wrong. The mycoplasma was robbing me of my cholesterol, and my body wasn’t able to manufacture hormones! We need hormones to sleep, and we need hormones to regulate mood. We need hormones to regulate body temperature, too. We also need hormones to keep from being depressed. After reading the evidence (research), I was convinced more than ever that mycoplasma was the cause of my problems. Then the thought occurred to me that Dave, for the first time, was a little off base when he called this organism a virus when it wasn’t. 83

However, my faith in him never wavered. He was still my hero. Because of Dave, I am alive today. Looking back, I have no regrets about refusing to take immune suppressing drugs. I believe my immune system was my only defense against the mycoplasma. I shudder to think what would have happened to me if I had not talked to Dave first. Would I be alive today to tell my story? With this new doctor, it didn’t take long for me to realize I was in a “pickle.” Even during my first office visit in April, I immediately figured out that she was a no-nonsense doctor. No but’s about it, it was her way or the highway. She thought I was absolutely crazy when I kept insisting that I was being attacked by an organism called mycoplasma. She immediately told me that this was garbage. There was no arguing with her either. She definitely made it clear to me that I needed to be on prescription drugs. (See Exhibit 3, Medical Records.) We both knew she had me over the barrel, because she was holding the pen which would write the letter to Social Security. Then and only then, would my private disability insurance company leave me alone. However, I was in a no-win situation. At this time, I had no other options. Returning to work was impossible and taking prescription drugs was not a choice on my list either. I do give this doctor credit, though. I believe she was sincerely trying to help me. However, I am stubborn and so was she. Now putting her off about taking drugs became harder and harder. I was worried. What if she told me to find another doctor? What would I do then? Then a blessing in disguise showed up in my mailbox. By May 2003, after spending nearly two years on my company’s disabled list, my company fired me. Overnight, I no longer had health insurance. I couldn’t afford COBRA either. But now that gave me an excuse why I couldn’t take prescription drugs. (See Exhibit 3, Medical Records.) I would tell her that they were too expensive, and I couldn’t afford them. To convince her that I was telling the truth, I showed her my termination letter and explained to her that I did not have the money to pay for expensive medical insurance, drugs, or treatments. Fortunately by this time, all of the documentation had been submitted to Social Security, and I was just biding my time waiting to be approved. I still had my back to the wall, though. The doctor kept insisting that I take affordable prescription drugs to suppress my immune 84

system. I fought her, but now I found myself running out of excuses. But once again, the U.S. Postal Service came to my rescue. The approval letter arrived in the mail from Social Security. My final diagnosis (based on the doctor’s report and blood tests) was lupus, rheumatoid arthritis, and bi-polar disorder. (See Exhibit 4, Medical Records.) At last I was free to change doctors and find one who was more open minded. Shortly thereafter, I did find a new doctor. However, I was still very ill, but he listened to my concerns and only prescribed antibiotics for my lupus and rheumatoid arthritis. Just when things started looking up, my dear friend Bob had to leave St. Louis. In April 2003, Bob was offered a job in Boise, Idaho. At the same time, I was still sick. Even though Bob didn’t want to leave me, he had no choice. His savings were gone, and he had to get a job. Of course, I wanted to go with him, but we both knew that this was impossible. On the day he left, as we hugged and said our goodbye’s, I thanked him for staying and taking such good care of me. I didn’t cry, because his parting words before he got in his car and pulled out of the driveway were, “I love you and I’ll be back.” AUTHOR’S NOTE: I would never have guessed that our last day together would be the last time I would ever see Bob again. I always thought Bob would come back to me, and we would live happily ever after. But that was not the way it was to be. After Bob left for Idaho, the next news I would hear about him was of his death.



Chapter 19

Who was That Un-Masked Man? Summer 2003

“Angels don’t wear shoes” – the last words my grandfather spoke before he died. In the summer of 2003, I was seeing a slight improvement from taking antibiotics for my lupus, but I was still experiencing joint and muscle pain. I could now walk without assistance, and I didn’t need a walker or wheelchair anymore. I also returned the “potty” chair to my father. Little by little, I was regaining my strength, but my joints were still crippled. One doctor even told me I would never have full use of them again. I had been an invalid the entire previous year, but now I finally felt strong enough to get out of the house and rejoin the living. Wanting to meet new friends, I joined a singles group. Since I always thought Bob would return to me, it never occurred to me that another man would walk into my life. But surprisingly, that’s exactly what happened. Dale and I first met in early September. Later on, he told me he had been watching me for several weeks, trying to build up the courage to introduce himself to me and ask me out for a date. Up until now, I would have said “no” because of my previous experience with Joe, but Dale was a “smooth” talker. Not only was he charming and witty, but he also had a medical degree and had been a successful businessman. Our physical and mental attraction to each other told me that we probably knew each other in spirit and had shared many past lives together. This was the only explanation I could come up with why we had such a strong, electrifying attraction for each other. I, therefore, came to the conclusion that we were definitely reunited soul mates. There was only one drawback to our relationship. Dale was not of “like” mind, and I realized this could cause a conflict later on down the road. Would he accept me for who I am? I knew people considered me “different,” even somewhat strange. I also realized my ideas were off-the-wall and sometimes even sounded crazy, but other people’s opinions never stopped me from expressing what I thought. 87

Dale did tolerate my ideas, however, and we did get along, except for one BIG technicality. He was the jealous type. When I met Dale, I didn’t realize it, but I had another secret admirer–a man named Donald. Dale noticed this right away. One night, we were at a party, and Donald was there, too. Dale pointed Donald out to me saying, “He’s stalking you!” I explained to Dale that Donald was just a friend. Dale then tried to educate me about men. “When I am nice to a guy,” Dale said, “ that throws off the wrong signal.” Dale added that to a man, this is a “flag” that means I am interested in him. Dale then said it was obvious that everywhere I went, Donald went, too. I argued that it was probably just a coincidence, that Donald just happened to pop up wherever I went, but Dale was convinced otherwise. He insisted that under most circumstances, guys do not have women for friends. “If a man does,” Dale explained, “it’s usually because he has a romantic interest in her.” Then in mid-October at another get-together, Dale and I had our first argument. Again, Donald happened to show up. That’s when Dale told me to stop talking to Donald all together. I then became upset because I didn’t like being told what to do or controlled. But I didn’t like to argue either, so to keep the peace, I agreed not to speak to Donald again. Although I gave in, I was angry. I believed Dale was wrong and just being a jerk. I couldn’t understand why he was so jealous of Donald in the first place. Actually, Donald was no threat to him at all. In fact, Donald had a girlfriend of his own. That same evening while we were driving home, we were still arguing about Donald. As I sat listening to Dale lecture me about men and how they think, I thought to myself, “That’s it! I’m getting out of this relationship!” I tried to think of a way to end it, but I was “chicken.” Then I got a brilliant idea. “Why not ask the Universe to end it for me?” Never before had I tried to manifest a romantic breakup, but I told myself, “Why not? Anything is possible!” So in my mind, I began to conjure up of the words to say to get Dale out of my life. “Okay, Linda, let’s see. What words do I use?” Putting the request out to the Universe, I silently said (in my mind) the following words: “How do I get out of this relationship? Thank you!”


“There!” I thought to myself, “I said it, and it’s now a done deal.” As far as I was concerned, all I had to do now was wait for the Universe to make it happen. (Note: Surprisingly, the Universe DOES work in mysterious ways, because my request manifested so fast that I was totally unprepared for what was about to happen next.) At 2:30 in the afternoon that following Tuesday, Dale and I were sitting in my livingroom discussing a cruise we were planning to take together on Halloween. Dale was quite a bargain hunter. He had gotten a great deal–only $250 per person for a three-day cruise. Dale was also very generous. He had paid for both of our cruises. On that particular October afternoon, it was a beautiful fall day. The sun was shining and the temperature outside was around 80 degrees. (Note: I live on a quiet dead-end street with very little thru traffic, and I also live in a split foyer house which has an open floor plan. In my livingroom, I have two sofas, which form an “L.” One is a love seat, which faces the front window, and the other is a full-sized sofa which has its back up against an exterior wall. My kitchen opens up to the livingroom, making it one big room, and the rooms are divided by the love seat.) At that time, Dale was sitting on the love seat opposite the front window, and I was sitting on the sofa against the wall. While we were discussing the cruise, we were suddenly interrupted by the telephone ringing. I got up and answered it, and to my surprise, it was Donald. He said, “Hi Linda. It’s Donald. You’ll never guess what happened!” I asked, “What?” He then proceeded to tell me the following story: On Sunday his girlfriend had broken her tooth. She then had to go to the dentist. Since her own dentist was booked up, she had to go to a new one. While sitting in the dentist’s chair, she thought the dentist was either overly friendly or flirting with her. After the appointment, she met with Donald, at which time she told him about the dentist’s behavior. While I was listening to Donald’s story, I kept wondering what in the world does this have to do with me? Then finally, Donald sprung it on me. “And, Linda, guess who the dentist was?” I asked, “Who?” Laughing, he replied, “Your brother!” Then Donald and I both started laughing. Donald knew my brother, and he also knew my brother was just a nice, outgoing person. Donald then commented that his girlfriend had probably misunderstood my brother’s friendliness. I then changed the subject and asked Donald 89

how he was doing, and he said, “Fine.” Then we both said good-bye, and I hung up the telephone. As I was returning to the livingroom, I chuckled to myself as I was thinking, “What a coincidence that Donald’s girlfriend broke her tooth and went to my brother!” When I sat back down on the sofa, I glanced over at Dale. Strange, I could see that he appeared to be angry. Dale then said in a threatening voice, “Who was that?” Defensively, I replied, “Donald.” That’s when Dale lost his temper. Even though I had only known Dale for a couple of months, I could tell he was furious, as he began yelling, “I warned you not to talk to that guy again. I’ve had it with you, Linda. I want my $250 back that I paid for your cruise. Then I’m out of here.” Trying to explain, I stammered, “But....but....but... that was only Donald telling me about his girlfriend. There was no harm intended.” By now, though, Dale was steaming. “I don’t care,” he screamed, “I want my $250. NOW!!” We then argued for what seemed like an eternity, but in reality was only a couple of minutes. In the meantime, I tried my best to convince Dale that I didn’t have the money. Although Dale was probably bluffing, he now threatened that if I didn’t give him the money, he was going to trash my house. After he said this, I couldn’t take any chances. I had no other choice but to believe him. Making matters worse, we were by ourselves, and the situation was definitely turning ugly. (Note: It looked as if I wasn’t going to get out of this one unscathed, but isn’t that when the unexpected always happens to me?) At that moment, Dale abruptly stopped yelling. By the look on his face, something had distracted him. He was no longer focusing his attention on me but was now staring at something out the front window. I could tell by the expression on his face that something unusual was going on outside–but what? Then suddenly, Dale jumped up from the love seat and ran over to the window, yelling, “God! I don’t believe this!” He then urgently gestured for me to come over and see what he was so excited about. Getting up as fast as I could, I hurried over to the window and stood next to him. Now hypnotized, neither one of us could move or utter a word, as we both stood there gawking out the front window. Like Dale, I, too, could hardly believe my eyes, for right across the street was a naked man running as fast as he could up the sidewalk!! 90

By the time I had made it over to the window, the naked man was just passing by in front of my house. From what I could tell, it appeared as if the naked man was oblivious to what was going on around him, because he never slowed down nor did he look in our direction. Apparently, it appeared that the naked man knew exactly where he was going, because he headed straight up the street, ran up a hill between two of my neighbor’s houses, and disappeared into one of the neighbor’s backyard. Without saying a word, Dale quickly made a bee-line for the telephone, picked it up, and dialed 9-1-1. While listening to his onesided conversation with the woman police dispatcher, I had a hard time keeping a straight face as Dale excitedly began describing in great (actually “minute”) detail how small the naked man’s penis was! Funny, how two people can witness the same event but never share the same experience. All I remember about the naked man’s anatomy was that he was barefoot–he wasn’t wearing any shoes. Within ten minutes, two Ballwin police officers pulled up in front of my house. Again, I live on a quiet street, and thank God, most of my neighbors were at work. Lucky for me, the few remaining neighbors didn’t come outside to see what the commotion was all about. Together, Dale and I went outside to talk to the policemen. Dale explained to them what had happened and pointed to the neighbor’s house where the naked man was last seen. At the end of Dale’s statement, I confirmed Dale’s statement to the police officers and told them that I, too, had seen the naked man. I also told the policemen that I had lived on my street for over 28 years and had never seen this man before. With that, both policemen got into their patrol cars and drove over to the house Dale had pointed out. They then parked their cars and got out. We watched as they walked up to the front door and rang the doorbell. When they didn’t get an answer, one of them walked over to the front window and peeked in. Then they both walked over to the garage window and peeked in. As Dale and I stood on my front lawn watching, we eventually lost sight of both policemen as they walked up the hill and disappeared into the neighbor’s backyard. At that time, Dale and I went back inside and sat down on the sofas. Both of us were still quite “shaken up” by what we had just witnessed, and by the look on Dale’s face, I could tell that he was now 91

having second thoughts. Trying to reassure him that what he had seen really did happen, I said, “I saw him, too!” At that moment, Dale seemed to have “snapped out of it” when he growled, “I want my money! NOW!” Not taking any chances, I didn’t answer him as I quickly jumped up from the sofa, ran out of the house, and headed up the street towards the policemen. When I caught up with them, I told them that my boyfriend and I were having an argument and asked if they would tell him to leave. By that time, Dale had come outside, too, and the policemen informed him that he had to go. So, with no other choice, Dale had to get into his car and drive off. After Dale left, the two policemen informed me that the neighbors were not at home. I again told the police officers that we really had seen a naked man running up the street, but by then, I’m sure they thought we had both been “smoking something.” The two police officers then left, and I went back into the house alone. When I got inside, I sat down on the couch to go over in my mind what had just happened. Suddenly, it dawned on me what might have really happened. I had a hunch, but how could I prove it? Just then, I got an idea. “What if I call Marla in Sedona? She’ll be able to give me the answer!” Immediately, I went over to the phone and called her. When she answered, I greeted her. Marla then asked how I was doing, and I told her I was doing fine up to now. I then asked her if she would do me a favor, and she said, “Sure.” I didn’t want to give anything away (I wanted to keep her “in the dark”), so I asked if she would channel for me. I told her something very unusual had happened to me that day and asked if she would find out what it was all about. Marla agreed to channel and told me to call her back the next evening. The next evening, when I called Marla back, she was curious about what had happened the previous day. She said that when she had channeled, they (spirit) told her the answer to my question was, “Yes. That it was an angel.” Marla then told me she had gotten nosy herself and had asked what had happened. She laughed as she told me they told her it was none of her business. She then asked me what happened. I started laughing as I told her the story. I explained to her that I had put out a request to the Universe last Friday night, and that the request had manifested. But because of the way I had put out the 92

request, I had gotten myself into trouble, and that naked man (the angel) had come to my rescue. I then filled her in on the rest of the story. At the end, we both agreed my request could have ended in a tragedy, but instead, it had turned out to be quite hilarious. I then explained to Marla that I had learned a BIG lesson from all of this. I told her that if I ever put out another request like this one again, I would add one word. “How do I get out of this relationship safely? Thank you!”



Chapter 20

There’s No Such Thing as a Free Lunch! December 2003

After I put out a request to the Universe, an opportunity will always appear. Whether I accept it or not, that’s my choice. I don’t believe in coincidences anymore, but after the “un-masked man” incident, Dale’s path kept crossing mine. Several times, we sat down to discuss what had happened, and after talking it over, we both took responsibility for our actions. I also realized that I had judged Dale too harshly, for suppressed under all that anger, he did have a good heart after all. That same year, I watched him help a heart attack victim at a New Year’s Eve party. The man had collapsed and had stopped breathing. Dale saved the man’s life, by performing CPR and got the man’s heart beating again. So we both decided to try again, and Dale and I got back together. We would start all over. Dale was 53 years old when I first met him and had been a very successful businessman, who was able to retire by the age of 43. His favorite saying is, “There’s no such thing as a free lunch,” meaning a person must work hard to become rich and successful. Dale is the perfect example of someone (unknowingly) using the power of intent to get what he wants or needs. The following is Dale’s story literally from rags to riches: Dale grew up in a middle-class neighborhood, where he attended public school. As a small child, Dale remembers having to wear handme-down clothes which he resented very much. He was constantly teased at school by the other children because of this. Of course, this made him feel inferior and insecure, and not fully understanding the reason, he became angry. So, at a very young age, he made a promise to himself that someday he was going to have everything he wanted. Dale was a hard worker and very ambitious, even at an early age when most kids are out playing or inside watching TV. By the age of 12, he had his first paper route and earned $13.00 a week. This was quite a feat for a boy in 1962. Dale didn’t squander his money either. Like his parents, he saved it. Then, by the time he was 15, he landed a higher paying job mowing and trimming lawns. By this time, he was 95

able to buy his own clothing and never had to wear hand-me-downs again. Amazingly, by the age of 17, he bought his first car (a 1963 Pontiac) and paid $600 cash for it. He was also paying for his own car insurance. One of his most proudest moments was when he bought his first new car, a 1968 Chevy Chevelle, at the age of 18. Dale also had a high IQ, and his intelligence blossomed, for he had an inquisitive and mechanical mind. He loved to tinker on cars. For instance, he only had his new Chevy one week, before he had taken it all apart on his parents’ driveway. His father threw a fit, until Dale finally put it back together (all by himself) within a couple of days. Even though cars were Dale’s passion, his greatest passion was to become an airline pilot. After graduating from high school during the Vietnam War, he wanted to enlist in the Air Force to fulfill his dream. But his parents, fearing he would be killed, wouldn’t let him enlist. Instead, Dale was given the opportunity of a lifetime. He was offered an enrollment in a prestigious auto engineering program. He jumped at this opportunity because only one in 10,000 applicants is accepted into this program. He breezed through engineering school in record time–within one year. Then an even greater opportunity came his way. He had applied for medical school and was accepted! Now, Dale had two careers to choose from–either become an automotive engineer or a doctor. He chose medical school. In 1972 he began medical school and that same year, he got married. Then, in 1976, the year Dale graduated from medical school, he and his wife had a baby boy, who they named Jake. Jake was a beautiful baby and Dale absolutely adored him. Jake had big blue eyes and curly blond hair and was the spitting image of his dad. Sadly, 1976 was also a painful year for Dale. That was the year his wife filed for divorce. After losing his family, Dale was now depressed, especially over the loss of Jake. Realizing he had to move on with his life, he had to make a decision. He could either take the licensing exam to become a doctor or he could pursue another lucrative career–automotive repair. Opting to take the path of least resistance to accumulate wealth, the decision was easy. Since it would take years to build a successful medical practice, he chose auto transmission repair.


Now Dale needed to find a place to set up business. He didn’t have to wait long, for an opportunity appeared out of nowhere. He had contacted a realtor, and lo and behold, the realtor found the shop of his dreams. An elderly man had just passed away who owned and operated a transmission repair shop, and Dale could buy the entire building and all the tools for an unbelievable bargain price of $35,000! There was an even bigger bonus. Location! Location! Location! The shop was located on a major thoroughfare in the city of St. Louis. Dale had to move fast on the deal and quickly bought it. Prosperity and good fortune apparently followed Dale around, for on the morning when he first opened his doors for business, three customers were parked outside waiting to get their transmissions fixed! Of all the automobile repair businesses, the “creme de la creme” of auto repair is transmissions, which generates the most money. However, repairing transmissions is not easy and requires specialized skills, but this was not a problem for Dale. He had been taking transmissions apart and putting them back together since he was 16. Besides being a top-notch auto mechanic, he also turned out to be a natural-born entrepreneur. However, money didn’t come to Dale that easy. He earned it by working long hard hours in his shop, sometimes burning the midnight oil. Although money drove him, he was honest but also shrewd. His business grew by word of mouth and advertising. Still, this wasn’t enough for Dale. He wanted more. So he bought two more buildings and set up two more transmission repair shops. Dale’s childhood dreams were finally coming true. He now had enough money to buy anything he wanted, and he did. He bought a 6,000 square foot mansion with seven bathrooms and hired two maids. He then bought a 34-foot cigarette boat. He finally fulfilled another dream. He bought an airplane and became a pilot. At last, all of his childhood dreams had come true. He now had all the “toys” he wanted. After many years of working long hard hours, dealing with irate customers, and managing employees, 97

Dale’s finally began to buckle under the stress. He then had to ask himself, “Is the aggravation and stress from making all this money worth it? Is it worth ruining my life and my health?” Dale decided it wasn’t. So he sold his shops and called it quits, and in 1993, he retired at the age of43. AUTHOR’S NOTE: As Dale and I got to know each other better, we gave each other “pet” names. He called me “Boo” because he claimed I was afraid of everything. I called him “Poo,” because even though he had made it all the way through medical school, he still cringes at the very thought of “you know what.”


Chapter 21

Seeing is Believing

The Common Cause Medical Research Foundation’s Annual Mycoplasma Conference Sudbury, Canada August 2004

Even what may have appeared to be a Canadian wild goose chase had a purpose. By the summer of 2004, I was still taking antibiotics as a treatment for my lupus and rheumatoid arthritis. I was disappointed, though, because I was showing very little improvement. I was still in pain, and my joints were still crippled. It seemed as if I were taking one step forward and two steps back. In August 2004, I talked Dale into taking me to a mycoplasma conference, which was being held in Sudbury, Canada. I convinced him that this would be a great opportunity for me to meet people who were involved in mycoplasma research. There, maybe I could find the answer for a cure. Unfortunately, I would be disappointed. The doctors at the conference still did not have the answer I was looking for. Still, I did not leave empty handed. There was one highlight at the conference. I had signed up for a dark field analysis of my “live” blood. This analysis was done with a digital microscope and a computer hooked up to a monitor. The microscope used a dark-light background instead of a white-light background. It is amazing what can be seen in the blood using dark-field analysis! Dark light reveals everything, including mycoplasma. Although I was fascinated with what I saw in my blood, I was also very disappointed. Here I thought I had made such great progress and was getting better, only to be disheartened when I saw the overwhelming number of these tiny parasitic organisms (mycoplasma) in my blood. Another interesting diagnosis came out of this live blood analysis. The technician also put my blood on an extra glass slide and let it dry. She then put the dried blood slide under the microscope. Based on the charts, my dried blood analysis revealed that I had “viral” RA. This 99

was startling news to me. This also meant that the damage to my joints was NOT caused by mycoplasma, but by viruses! This was also proof that there were several different types of organisms attacking me at the same time! I also learned something else at the conference that was very interesting. Rheumatoid arthritis (RA) can be caused by three different types of organisms: (1) bacteria; (2) mycoplasma; and (3) viruses. AUTHOR’S NOTE: When I returned to St. Louis and met with my doctor the following week, I mentioned to him that tests done in Canada had revealed that I had “viral” rheumatoid arthritis. Unbeknownst to me, my doctor had ordered a blood test to see if I had the Human Parvo B19 Virus which causes RA. I would not find out until December of 2004, that the results had come back positive for the Human Parvo B19 Virus.




Chapter 22

Who Took My Paperwork? August 2004

Angels, just like magicians, have many tricks up their sleeves. They, too, can make things disappear right before our very eyes! In a hurry to get home, Dale and I had made it back to St. Louis from Sudbury, Canada by August 30 in record time. Dale was in the market to buy a new car, and knew that August 31 was the last day he could get a great deal on a new pickup truck. So around ten o’clock in the morning on August 31, we drove up to a local car dealership, where he had already picked out a silver truck. Believe me, nobody can out deal Dale. That entire morning, Dale and the car salesman went round and round negotiating a price, until Dale finally won. He got the truck $7,000 below list price. By one o’clock in the afternoon, it was a done deal. Dale had a brand new pickup truck for around $10,000. The paperwork was signed, and all we had to do now was wait for the truck to be prepped and cleaned. After that, we could drive it home. Unfortunately, this was easier said than done, because the mechanics were on strike. Telling us the cleaning and the prep would take several additional hours meant we had no other choice but to sit and wait. Frustrated and impatient, too, I was in a hurry to get out of there, because I had important plans for the rest of the afternoon. I wanted Dale to take me to the main library, where I was going to do some research for my children’s website. Finally, the truck was ready, but it was now going on three o’clock. After being at the dealership all day, I was anxious to get out of there. So, we hurried out to the new car, jumped in, and headed straight for the library. Arriving at the library around 3:30 p.m., I didn’t waste any time. I quickly got out of the truck, leaving Dale sitting behind the wheel going through his paperwork. I assumed he would catch up with me later in the library.


Just as I was getting settled at a table, Dale came running in. Appearing to be upset, he told me to pick up everything, that we had to go back to the car dealership right away. Not asking why, I picked up my things, and we quickly headed for the door. On the way out, Dale said he couldn’t find his paperwork, that it was gone! Getting closer and closer to panicking, he kept saying, “Who took my paperwork?” Trying not to panic myself, I calmly told him I had seen him sign the paperwork and put it in the bag, adding that I had also seen him put the bag by the front door of the showroom. Still trying to calm him down, I said, “I kept my eye on the bag all day. Nobody touched it. There’s got to be a logical explanation for all of this. You’ll see.” When we got out to the library parking lot, we got in the truck and we both carefully looked through the bag. It was true. The paperwork was gone. It appeared to have just disappeared. Dale had to find someone to blame, and it turned out to be me. He accused me of rushing him, and it was now all my fault that the paperwork was missing. On the way back to the dealership, he called them on his cell phone. They did a quick search but couldn’t find the original paperwork either. By now, Dale was panicking. He kept mumbling that if he didn’t find the original paperwork, he couldn’t get his license plates. We made record time getting back to the dealership. Dale drove it in less than a half hour. After turning into the parking lot, Dale stopped right in front of the showroom doors, turned off the engine, jumped out of the truck, and quickly ran inside. As for me, I slowly got out of the truck and followed him in. When I entered the lobby, I could see that all Hell had broken loose. I didn’t want to get in the way, so I quietly stood just inside the front doors and watched. It was chaotic. Everyone was scurrying around looking for the lost paperwork. When I first walked in, I noticed a middle-aged gentleman standing in the lobby about ten feet in front of me. He appeared to be waiting for someone or something. Not wanting Dale to accuse me of flirting, I barely made eye contact with the man. So pretending to be minding my own business, I kept my eyes glued to the floor and my lips zipped. After a few seconds, I had the feeling that the man was staring at me, so I looked up at him. Probably bored, too, he politely smiled and 104

asked, “Are you here to buy a new car?” I then told him that we had already bought a new truck and had just gotten a fantastic deal. Now striking up a conversation, he told me he was retired and worked part-time moving cars from dealership to dealership. He then went on to say that he had just arrived a few minutes ago and was waiting to pick up a car. Here, he had told me something about himself, so now I felt obligated to tell him something about myself. Of course, I didn’t want to tell him I was disabled, so instead, I told him that I wrote children’s books. Immediately, his face lit up as he exclaimed, “You have to meet my wife Fran! She writes children’s books, too, and works for West Magazine.” Well, when I heard the words, West Magazine, I froze. “Oh my God!” I thought to myself. “Is this fate or what?” I must have sounded crazy when I excitedly told him, “Oh my God. I was supposed to come back here and meet you!” He didn’t appear to be spooked, though. Instead, he just smiled and listened as I explained to him that I had been trying for months to find West Magazine’s phone number. Since they were new, their phone number wasn’t listed in the phonebook yet. I told him I had been wanting to contact the magazine to publish a human interest story. He turned out to be very kind and helpful, for not only did he give me his home phone number, he gave me his wife’s cell phone number and her work number, too! Now the car he had been waiting for was ready, and he had to leave. But before he walked out the door, I HAD to ask him one last question. “What made you start talking to me?” Chuckling, he replied, “Oh, I guess you looked interesting.” And with that, he said good-bye and walked out the door. AUTHOR’S NOTE: We never did find the original paperwork. We searched the truck one more time, and the people at the dealership looked everywhere, too. Dale ended up having to fill out all new paperwork. We never did figure out the mystery of the vanishing paperwork either. Maybe this was all just one big coincidence, that I happened to come back to the dealership just in the nick of time to cross paths with Fran’s husband. Or maybe it wasn’t a coincidence. Maybe it was my angels at the bottom of this after all. I will never underestimate angels again, because they are ever so clever. They can make things appear and disappear right before our very eyes!



Chapter 23

It’s a Sign! Fall 2004

Sometimes I am standing so close to the answer, that I can’t read the writing on the wall. Even before I started writing the Angel Children books, I did not want to use my ex-husband’s last name. My maiden name just didn’t sound right either. The name Emmanuel kept popping up in my mind. I love that name because it means “God is with us.” However, I didn’t want to offend people by writing under this name, so I was afraid to go ahead and use it. By December 2004 I had to make a decision–choose a pen name. My children’s book was almost done and ready to be published, and I couldn’t wait any longer. So early in December on a Sunday night, I called my ex-daughter-in-law DJ and asked her what she thought about my using the pen name Emmanuel. (Note: DJ was a member of a very conservative Christian church, and I thought she would be a good judge of whether to use it or not.) I told her there were no Emmanuel’s in the St. Louis phonebook. DJ then said she would get back with me after asking some of her church friends what they thought about my using the name. As I hung up the phone, I looked at the clock. It was only 8:00 p.m. Too early to go to bed and too late to start working on a project, so I decided to watch a movie instead. I then looked in my video cabinet and pulled out one of my favorites, A Little Princess, which is a remake of a classic Shirley Temple film. I love this story and never get tired of watching it. When the movie was over, I didn’t get up from the couch right away to stop it. But as I watched the credits slowly scroll down the screen, something caught my eye. At first, I thought I was seeing things, so I stopped the tape, hit the rewind button and watched the credits again. This time what I thought I had seen was definitely there. But just to be sure, I watched the credits one more time. As the credits slowly scrolled down the screen, a name appeared, “Emmanuel.” “Oh my God! It’s a sign! God is telling me it’s okay to use it.” And so I did. 107


Chapter 24

Never Stop Believing in Miracles! December 2004

“Just believe in yourself! You can make it happen!” – The Angel Children in I Love Who I Am By November 2004, The Angel Children’s first book, I Love Who I Am, was ready to be published. At the same time, I decided I was ready to begin fulfilling the prophecy–to tell people where to go to be safe. But how could I even begin to help people if I wasn’t cured myself? Obviously, I had to find the cure for mycoplasma infections. So after Thanksgiving, I put the request out to the Universe. I made this one another extra special request. I raised my hands above my head and looked up to the Heavens and spoke these exact words out loud: “How can I go out and help people, if I’m not cured myself? Find me the cure. Thank you!” I was sure that the right information would eventually cross my path, but, in the meantime, I knew that it was up to me to make it happen, but where do I even begin? Just then, I thought back to August 2004 when we had attended the mycoplasma conference in Canada. At the conference, I had the opportunity to meet and talk with a researcher, Dr. Harold Clark, who was an authority on mycoplasma. Dr. Clark had also been the keynote speaker at the conference. During our conversation, he recommended that I find a doctor who could give me a tetracycline IV to treat my mycoplasma infection. (Note: Tetracycline inhibits mycoplasma, but doesn’t kill it. Your immune system has to do that.) So my “intent” was to find a doctor who would give me this treatment. Unfortunately, I had to rule out my own doctor, because I had already asked him, and he had told me no, that he couldn’t do it. “Where do I start?” I asked myself. Just then, I remembered another lecturer at the conference, a Dr. Katherine Poehlmann. At that time, I was so impressed with her lecture on arthritis that afterwards I bought her book, The Arthritis Connection. The book is filled with many resources, including websites. I hadn’t had time to thoroughly


read it yet, and I didn’t even know where it was. So I immediately began searching through my bookshelves and finally found it. In the book, I found a website which looked promising. I then got on the Internet and went to their home page. I was in luck. I found a list of alternative doctors in the United States who treated autoimmune diseases. I printed off the list, and then Dale and I went to work. We started calling doctors all over the country. First, we called alternative doctors in the Midwest and the East Coast, and then as far south as Texas and Florida. But each time, we struck out. None of the doctors we called used tetracycline as a treatment for lupus. The list kept getting shorter and shorter, and we were running out of doctors to call within driving distance of St. Louis. Just then, Dale noticed a doctor by the name of Glen Smith in Birmingham, Alabama. Dale was familiar with Birmingham, because his father had grown up there. Dale told me Birmingham was accessible, and it was only an eight-hour drive from St. Louis. Now I prayed this doctor was the one, because he was the last name on the list. Before calling Dr. Smith, Dale and I argued over who would talk to him. Since Dale had a medical degree, he insisted on doing the talking. I realized I couldn’t win this battle, so I gave in. But all was not lost. I listened to their conversation on the other phone. When Dale called Dr. Smith’s office, we were surprised when Dr. Smith answered the phone himself. Dale introduced himself and explained to Dr. Smith that we were looking for a tetracycline IV to treat lupus. Dr. Smith then told Dale that he had a new treatment that could help me. As soon as I heard Dr. Smith’s description of the treatment and the diseases he had successfully treated with it, I knew immediately that he was the one. However, Dale wasn’t so easily convinced. He was skeptical. Later, Dale tried to keep my hopes down by telling me, “Linda, no one has EVER been cured of lupus!” Dr. Smith requested that we fax him my most recent medical records, so he could look over my medical history. We told him we would, and that same week we requested my medical records from my doctor’s office. We then put together all of the pertinent and most recent records and faxed 32 pages to him. Afterwards, we made two appointments for that coming Saturday and Monday to go down to Birmingham to receive my first two treatments of mild silver protein.


We left for Birmingham Friday morning and spent the evening visiting sites around Birmingham. When we arrived at Dr. Smith’s office bright and early the next morning, he went over my medical records with us very carefully. Dale and I were surprised when he pointed out to us that my September 2004 blood tests revealed that I had been exposed to the Human Parvo B19 Virus. This was news to us, as we had overlooked it. (Note: Could this be the micro-organism responsible for my “viral” RA which showed up in the “dried” blood analysis in Canada? Could this also be the “Stealth” virus Dave was referring to? In Dr. Poehlmann’s book, she states that Human Parvo B19 Virus causes rheumatoid arthritis. Unfortunately, to this day, it’s a mystery as to what exactly caused my “viral” RA.) Dr. Smith explained to us about the treatment and the after- effects. If I did have an infection (micro-organisms) and there was a kill-off, I would go through the Herxheimer effect. I told Dr. Smith that I was very familiar with this effect. (Note: It’s your body’s reaction to the toxins the organisms release when they die.) Dr. Smith then explained that the reaction normally occurs within three to five hours after the treatment. He went on to say that if I did have a reaction, my body would react with “flu-like” symptoms. The first IV treatment was half-strength, just in case I was allergic to it. Right after I received the treatment, Dale and I went back to the hotel room. And just as Dr. Smith predicted, two hours later I experienced flu-like symptoms, a slight headache and a stuffy nose. But because the treatment was half-strength, I only had a mild reaction. Even with a half dose, this treatment proved to be a miracle! When I woke up the next morning and sat up on the edge of the bed, I could put my right leg up on the bed. (Note: This may sound silly to write about in my story, but please understand that this was a major accomplishment at that time in my life.) I shouted to Dale, “Look! I can put my leg up on the bed!” I hadn’t been able to do that in three years. (Note: Before the treatment, I had to sit on a chair or on the edge of the bed to put my pants on because I couldn’t lift my leg up without holding onto something for support. Now, after one treatment, I could do it without support.) Even more amazing, I got up from the bed without experiencing terrible pain. Overall, I was amazed at the results of this treatment. All this after just one half-strength treatment! What would I be able to do after several full-strength treatments? For the first time since I had gotten sick, I felt pretty good, too. The pain 111

had almost disappeared in my joints. Dale was still skeptical, though, but I was convinced more than ever that this treatment was the answer to my prayers. Late Monday morning we went back to Dr. Smith’s office for my second treatment of mild silver protein (MSP). By 2:00 p.m., the treatment was over, but we couldn’t stay and wait for the reaction. We had to head back to St. Louis. It was an eight-hour drive, and Dale didn’t want to stay overnight again. I didn’t start getting a reaction until around 5:00 p.m., exactly three hours after the treatment. But, by then, we were well on our way. Dale offered to pull over and stop, but I told him to keep going. This time however, I got chills, fever, and a headache. Dale was concerned, but I insisted he keep driving. I told him I could make it. I did hang in there, even though this time I had a much stronger reaction than after the first treatment. By the time we did get home, the chills and fever were almost gone. Dr. Smith had suggested soaking in a bathtub filled with hot water would help break the fever. So we did just that and filled the bathtub with hot water. I then got in and soaked, and the fever finally broke. The next day when I woke up, I felt great but I felt a little worn out (just like recovering from a flu). But for the first time in years, I could move my joints and muscles without experiencing excruciating pain. Exactly one week later, I had an appointment with my RA specialist. I told him about the mild silver protein treatment I had received. My doctor then examined me and everything checked out okay, then my blood was drawn. Now I just had to wait for the letter to come in the mail with the blood test results. Sure enough, within a week, the letter arrived with the results (Exhibit 6, Medical Records). Dale and I were astonished. After just two half-strength treatments, the results from the blood tests revealed my lupus and RA factor were negative! With his medical background, Dale had a hard time believing it. In disbelief, Dale shook his head and said, “No one has ever been cured of lupus! It’s impossible!” He couldn’t argue, though, because blood tests don’t lie. My lupus was definitely in remission, and the mycoplasma was dead!


Chapter 25

The Universe Will Return My Money! June 2005

“Lost” money will always return to those with “clean” hands. Back in the spring of 2004, I had signed a contract with a computer consultant to design, develop, and write games for my children’s website. This man was an acquaintance, and I thought I could trust him. I was wrong! He demanded $2,000 up front as a down payment, which I paid him at the signing of the contract. When Dale got wind of what I had done, he “hit the roof.” I got a big lecture about not giving someone money before the job was finished. Of course, he was right. Just as Dale predicted, the computer consultant changed his tune as soon as he received the money. If I would not have called the computer consultant and pestered him, I would never have heard from him again. However, when I did get through to him, he was always too busy to do the programming for me. The last straw was when he stood me up for the fifth time, again without even phoning to cancel. It began to look as if Dale was going to be right. He believed the computer consultant was just giving me the run around, hoping I would just give up and forget about him. BUT, the computer consultant did not know me. I wasn’t about to let him cheat me out of$2,000. If I had to, I would get my money back, and I would have the last word. Again, Dale criticized me for picking this guy to do my website. Rubbing it in, Dale predicted, “You’ll never get your money back. This guy is a deadbeat, Linda! He can’t even hold a job!” Dale made me feel even worse by saying that the computer consultant had confided in him (Dale) that he had three DWI’s under his belt. Dale educated me again by saying that after the next DWI, the computer consultant would go to jail. Dale then informed me that even if I were to sue the guy and win, it would be impossible to collect the judgment. My only defense was to say, “You’ll see, the Universe will return my money!” Dale scoffed at this and just shook his head meaning I didn’t have a prayer of ever seeing my money again. But I had no 113

doubt in my mind. I knew I would somehow get it back. The Universe would return my money, because I had “clean” hands. All I had to do was “ask” for its return, and it would come back. However, I couldn’t convince Dale of this. He wasn’t a “believer” like I was. On May 18, 2005, I filed a lawsuit in St. Louis County small claims court. What a coincidence! Within two weeks, a producer from a major TV studio called me. She asked if I would be interested in settling my lawsuit on a national TV judge show that was debuting this fall. Of course, I said yes, but that didn’t seal the deal. I had to wait for the producers to contact the computer consultant, and he had to agree to appear on the show, too. Up until now, the computer consultant had no idea that I had filed a lawsuit. The papers had not yet been served, and they weren’t scheduled to be served until around the 12th of June. All I could do was hope that he would agree to appear on the show. Fortunately, the producers talked him into it. It was actually a “no brainer” that he would agree to do this. By appearing on the judge show, I had everything to lose, and he had everything to gain. He had a win/win situation. Even if he lost, he still got to keep my $2,000. On the other hand, if I lost the case, I walked away empty handed. However, if I won my case, the show would pay me whatever the judgment was. There was still another risk. We both had to sign an agreement with the studio to accept the judge’s ruling as final, which meant neither one of us could appeal. I always wondered if there was an incentive to get people to appear on TV judge shows so they can make fools of themselves. There is. On this particular judge show, the computer consultant and I each received $150 for appearing on the show. The production company also paid each of our air fares (separate flights), paid for our hotel lodging (separate hotels), and paid for our meals. The judge show I appeared on was pure reality. There were no dress rehearsals nor was there a script. I had only one chance to prove my case. There were no second or third takes. Also, everything was based on law. If I won, it would be based on the evidence I presented to the producers. (Note: I must add that neither the defendant nor I had any clue what the other had submitted to the producers.) The production company did not offer to pay for any witnesses to fly down with me to testify. This disappointed Dale tremendously, because he had witnessed everything that had taken place. But Dale 114

wasn’t going to miss this opportunity for the world. He went with me, but he had to pay his own $450 airfare. Poor Dale! When we arrived at the studio, the producers asked the studio audience if someone would give up his or her seat so Dale could sit in on my case. Surprisingly, not one person volunteered to give up their seat, so Dale had to watch the taping on a TV monitor in the producers’ break room. I was fascinated with the “behind the scenes” production of a TV judge show. Three hours before the taping, a limo picked Dale and me up from the hotel. We were then taken to the studio where I had to sign lots of paperwork and releases. I was then escorted to a trailer where a makeup artist applied “pancake” makeup to my face. She then pulled my long hair back so tight that I swear I could hear my skin and hair stretching! It hurt, but it had one nice effect. It pulled my skin back so tight that all the wrinkles on my face disappeared. I was told later that I looked 15 years younger on TV. But what a price to pay! It was painful to even laugh! The producers insisted that this had to be done, because they were afraid my long hair would brush up against the microphone which would then cause static. Since the defendant and I stayed at separate hotels, we never saw each other until the show. Our first glimpse of each other was when we each separately walked into the courtroom. I also found out I was extremely lucky to even be there that day. Before the show, my associate producer told me I was the second last taping of the season. She also told me that after the last taping, there was going to be a huge production party. She then added that all of the executives from the studio were there that day watching the tapings. They had all flown in to attend the production party that night. From what my associate producer told me about the judge ahead of time, I believed this judge would be under pressure to give it his best shot to impress the studio executives. After all, it was his first season, and everyone knows, it’s all about ratings. Therefore, I had no idea what to expect, so I prepared myself for the worst. I decided this new judge could swing either way. Maybe he would punish me for being so stupid, or maybe he would be on my side and see through the computer consultant and rule in my favor. I realized I was at the mercy of a judge I knew nothing about or had not even seen on TV yet. Would he be another Judge Judy or a loveable Judge Joe Brown? All


I could do was hope that justice would be served and he would rule in my favor. One hour before the taping, the producers, the director and the judge met behind closed doors to go over the evidence. Thank goodness I was a good record keeper and had given the producers sound documentation. I believe that the strategy and outcome of the cases are decided behind those closed doors. I must add that both the defendant and I were clueless as to what their strategy was. Again, I had no idea what evidence or defense the computer consultant had given to his own producer and vice versa. We each walked into the courtroom “cold.” Finally, the show was almost ready to begin. As the defendant and I stood quietly waiting for the proceedings to start, the crew did last minute adjustments to the cameras. Fortunately, all six cameras were hidden, which kept me from being even more nervous. While the crew was making their final adjustments, the audience was standing in the background socializing. Finally, everything was set and ready to begin. I took one deep breath and let it out as the bailiff told everyone to rise as the judge made his entrance. Immediately, I could tell this judge was a no-nonsense judge and would be in control of his courtroom. From what I had learned, he was an experienced judge. Incredibly, he had worked his way up through law enforcement and law school, and he was now a full-fledged criminal court judge in real life. When it was my turn to speak, my part turned out to be easy. All I did was tell the truth. However, the defendant wasn’t so lucky. His only defense was to lie. He also underestimated this judge and thought he could outsmart him. (Note: Was he in for a rude awakening!) The judge turned out to be my hero. I could tell from the beginning that he was on my side, and he was actually winning the case for me. I did keep my composure, too. Unless asked a question, I kept my mouth shut, did not interrupt the judge, and acted like the perfect lady. Throughout the 51-minute taping, the judge continuously made a fool out of the defendant, along with keeping the studio audience laughing. The judge had me laughing so hard, that I found it difficult to keep a straight face during the trial. I knew I had to be careful, though, because I didn’t want to upstage this judge or attract


unnecessary attention to myself. At this point, I just wanted to win and get my money back. It immediately became apparent that the defendant and I did not share the same experience/story. Even if he had to lie, the defendant was determined to win the case, but obviously he was no match for this judge. Right off the bat, the judge saw through him. Then, because of the evidence, the judge was able to set the defendant up, catching him in lie after lie after lie. It had turned into a real cat and mouse game, and the rat had walked right into the trap! Finally, the judge put the defendant out of his misery and ruled in my favor. As for the defendant’s character, the judge made him appear to be a crook and the village idiot. As the decision was being handed down, the defendant just stood there in a daze, looking “whooped” with his head hung down in defeat. On the other hand, the judge proved to be charming, clever and witty, and the audience (including me) adored him. After it was over, we all gave the judge a standing ovation. Later, Dale told me he was proud of me. I confessed that I was relieved that it was all over and just glad to get my $2,000 back. (Deep down inside, though, I was also proud of myself. I had kept out of trouble by keeping my mouth shut.) However, I also got the last word in, just as I had predicted. At the end of the show, the defendant and I were each separately escorted out of the courtroom and asked several questions in front of a TV camera. I went first. Oops! (Note: I had forgotten all about this part of the show and was totally unprepared. I had no clue what questions were going to be asked and had not rehearsed my answers to any possible questions.) This was an entirely different situation than in the courtroom, where all six cameras were hidden. Now, the camera was right smack dab in front of my face. For me, this was terrifying, and I felt as if I were a deer caught in headlights. Fortunately, I was able to regain my composure, stay calm, and answer all of the questions. After my Q&A was over, I was disappointed that I didn’t get to hear what the defendant had to say. Unfortunately, we were whisked away, because Dale and I had to catch our flight back to St. Louis, which was scheduled to leave in two hours. I didn’t get to see the final “cut” either until I watched it on TV in my own livingroom. Editors are amazing. They edited our 51-minute


taping down to 7.5 minutes (without commercials). Yet, none of the show’s impact was lost. In the final scene outside the courtroom doors, the editors had reversed it. Now the defendant was first. It was obvious he was very angry about the outcome of the show. As the camera zoomed in on his face, instead of attacking the judge, he vehemently bad mouthed me on national TV. Actually, his words backfired on him. None of his comments were credible, and his bad attitude just re-enforced that he really was a scoundrel and was guilty as sin. As I had predicted, I did get the last word. Even though I went first, the producers were clever in asking me the right questions. Unbeknownst to me, my answers to their questions were a perfect rebuttal to the defendant’s hateful remarks. The show ended with a closeup of me saying, “I wrote the program myself in just four hours, what he couldn’t do in eight months. The’s up and running. The website....I’m doing it myself.” Later on that evening after the show, as Dale and I were sitting on the plane waiting for takeoff, I could tell Dale was still upset about not being part of the studio audience. It was just the opposite for me. I was exhilarated! I had come out smelling like a rose. Here, I had gotten all my money back and, at the same time, had appeared on national TV! As the plane was taking off, Dale was staring out the window. Smiling, I looked over at him and reminded him of what I had told him one month earlier. “See, didn’t I tell you the Universe would return my money?” I could tell he heard me, but he was intentionally ignoring me. Once the plane was in the air, though, he finally turned his head around and looked at me, and that’s when I got in the last jab, “And guess what?” Dale then rolled his eyes and said, “What?” Now grinning from ear to ear, I announced, “Today, I got something I could never afford to buy! I got to mention my trademark on national TV!” AUTHOR’S NOTE: Sure enough, my request to the Universe had manifested. Exactly one week later, the check came in the mail. My two thousand dollars had returned to me! 118

Chapter 26

Something Good Out of Something Bad August 2005

“But I tell you who hear me, love your enemies. Do good to those who hate you.” – Jesus, Luke 6:27 One Monday night in August, my brother, who was recently divorced, called Dale up on the phone. My brother and Dale had become very good friends. Since they were both single, my brother asked Dale to go out Wednesday night to a singles bar. Dale told him he would, and this would be the first time in two years that Dale would be out with the boys. When I found out about their plans, I retaliated and told Dale, “Well, I think I’ll ask my girlfriend if she wants to go out that night, too. Teasing Dale, I rubbed it in by saying, “Who knows, maybe I’ll even run into Joe!” Saying this didn’t go over too well, because Joe was a sore subject between Dale and me. Dale blamed everything that had happened to me on Joe, but I knew that what Joe had done to me was necessary and had happened in order for me to fulfill the prophecy. Again, if it weren’t for Joe, I never would’ve gotten sick, this book would never have been written, and millions of people would never have found out about mild silver protein. So how could I hate someone who played such an important role in making this all come true? Something bad is turning into something good. On Wednesday night Dale went out with my brother and I went out with my friend Helen. Helen and I went to the dance club where I had first met Joe. That night there was a band playing, and it was so crowded that Helen and I had to sit at the bar. During the course of the evening, I noticed a gray-haired man sitting at the other end of the bar staring at me. The room was very dark, yet I could tell that this man was watching me. I didn’t recognize his face, nor did he look familiar, but I was curious. Before the night was over, I was determined to find out who he was. Finally, I couldn’t stand the suspense any longer. I had to get a closer look at this guy to see for myself who he was. Logically, the only way I could do this was to go to the lady’s room, which would 119

take me right past where he was sitting. Without wasting another second, I picked up my purse, got out of my chair, and headed for the bathroom. As I was passing where he was sitting, he turned around on his stool and familiarly called my name, “Linda!” I immediately froze. I would know that voice anywhere. There was no doubt in my mind who it was. It was Joe! Now after four years, I stood face to face with the man who had broken my heart. Under similar circumstances, most women would have slapped him across the face or kicked him in the groin. As for me, I did not have any anger left in my heart. I had forgiven him a long time ago. Of course, this didn’t mean that I liked how he had treated me. On the contrary! But “spiritually,” I couldn’t hate him. When I looked at his face, I hardly recognized him. The last four years had taken a heavy toll on him, and his face showed it. No longer was his hair and beard a beautiful shiny reddish-brown. Instead, they were a grizzled gray. As he got up from the stool, I was taken by surprise. When I first met him, he was 6'5". Now, no longer did he stand tall, and he had that “tired” look about him. This was definitely not the same Joe I had fallen in love with four years ago–or was it? Four years ago he had professed to hating his own mother. He had also expressed anger and hatred towards both his ex-wife and his exgirlfriend. Now I realize he was angry at all women in general. His attitude had finally caught up with him. Joe is the perfect example of how karma works. You reap what you sow. Hate–it will always come back full circle. At that moment, I took the initiative. I smiled and gave him a hug. I asked how he was doing, and he said he was doing fine. I then told him that my first children’s book was finally finished and that I had self-published it. Funny, how we no longer had anything in common, because within a few minutes, we had run out of things to say. So, I mentioned to him that I had a new boyfriend, and he quickly responded that he had a girlfriend. Finally, I figured out a way to end this awkward situation by making an excuse that I had to go to the bathroom. Then with “no regrets,” I walked away and went into the lady’s room. Now the last chapter in “The Book of Joe” had come to an end. I finally had closure.


Chapter 27

The Escape Clause September 2005

If mankind had never taken a risk, we’d still be living in caves. In mid-September, I was going through a crisis. Negative thoughts kept racing through my mind about what the pharmaceutical companies might do to stop me from telling my story. Here I was, a woman recovering from a disability and standing up against “giants” who had trillions of dollars backing them. I also didn’t want to become another Tessa in The Constant Gardener. She was killed for standing up against the powerful pharmaceutical companies, and I believed mild silver protein was going to turn the medical industry upside down. Besides that, the media would have a picnic. They would dig into my past and try to prove my story was fake. Just like the author of A Million Little Pieces, I would be scrutinized and placed under a microscope. All of my “dirty laundry” would be “aired” for everyone to view, and no stone would be left unturned. I began to question whether I should move forward. Dale didn’t help matters any by putting pressure on me, telling me it was impossible to do what I hoped to accomplish. He warned, “The odds are against you, Linda! You have no money!” And he should know. He was an experienced businessman, and I believe he was only trying to save me from what he thought would be a costly mistake. He pleaded with me not to go through with what he thought was a crazy venture. Dale knew I loved the ocean. Trying to get me to change my mind, he tempted me by offering to buy us a beautiful cabana home in Florida. When that didn’t work, he gave me another option. If I didn’t want to live in Florida, we could build our dream home on a beach in Panama. As each day passed by, this offer was sounding better and better. I told myself that it still wasn’t too late to change my mind and bail out. Making the decision even tougher, at night I dreamed about sitting on a beautiful white sandy beach with the warm sun on my face and a 121

soft tropical breeze blowing through my hair. Thoughts kept coming to me that I could stay comfortably “hidden” for the rest of my life with very little problems, worries, or conflicts. Then, without warning, a friend’s daughter who was suffering from severe bi-polar depression, committed suicide. When I learned of her death, I became very upset because what she had been going through was exactly what I had experienced. I then began to think about the millions of people who are suffering as she and I had suffered. The thought that people were sick from diseases, which could be treated successfully, was tearing me apart. One side of me wanted to “disappear” and the other side wanted to proclaim to the world that these horrible diseases could be stopped in their tracks. Looking back I realize I was going through this because God was offering me an “escape clause” in my soul contract. I could still back out if I wanted to. It was my choice. But deep down inside I wanted to do it. To convince myself, I thought about whom I had been in past lives. My angels had told me that I volunteered to do things nobody else would do. They also said that I had been a messenger in many past lives. In some past lives I had even been tortured and crucified. I could hardly believe they were talking about Linda. Me....brave? Finally, I made a decision. I always like to end with a joke, because God has a sense of humor, too. Ironically, I laughed as I told God, “Maybe this time, history won’t repeat itself and they won’t shoot me! I’m not a quitter! I’m gonna do it!” AUTHOR’S NOTE: Looking back, I believe a pattern was forming here. Maybe it’s my imagination, but it seems like every time I make a big commitment to God........BOOM!! A lifethreatening event soon follows. 122

Chapter 28

Once is Not Enough! December 2005

“Never count your chickens before they hatch!” — a favorite cliché of farmers By the end of November, everything was again moving along smoothly. I had another doctor’s appointment and it had been six months since my last mild silver protein treatment. My doctor ordered blood tests and all I had to do was go home and wait for his letter with the lab results. When the letter finally arrived, I was ecstatic when I read that the lupus and RA were still in complete remission. This was also my one-year anniversary since my first mild silver protein treatment. Now, I could take it easy. The prophecy was coming true! Here I was writing a book about my illness and my recovery. Better yet, I had the world’s best PR person, Steve Harrison, on my team. Everything was finally falling into place perfectly. (Note: Well, I take it back–not so perfectly.) One week before Dale and I were to fly to Philadelphia for the first Quantum Leap seminar, I received a telephone call. It was Steve. He was calling with bad news. He informed me that he didn’t think I was ready for the Quantum Leap Program yet. He felt I wasn’t at the same level the other participants were. He then apologized for the inconvenience and told me he was refunding all of my money. I was devastated. I told him I had already paid for my airline tickets, and they were not refundable. I guess if I would have insisted on attending, he would have let us come, but after talking to him about it, he finally convinced me that indeed I wasn’t ready yet. When I hung up the phone, I asked God, “Why is this happening to me? I’m ready!” I just didn’t get it. For the rest of the day I wondered what was really going on. I kept asking God what was the reason why this had to happen, but I was given no answer. Usually, when I need an answer from above, I go to bed that night with it on my mind, believing that I will receive the answer by the next 123

morning. Sure enough, when I woke up the next morning, I got the feeling that the time just wasn’t right yet, that there was something more to come. But I still didn’t understand why I had to wait. I was ready, and the book was almost done. I hadn’t mentioned this before, but Dale and I had a psychic reading in late October. The psychic had told us that we were definitely soul mates and had many past lives together. She also told me in private, that a man by the name of “Steve” would be influential in my career. This message was given to me long before I started listening to Steve. Now, I was doubly confused. What had happened? Actually, something good did happen out of something bad. We were able to use the airline tickets after all. Originally, we were flying in to Boston and driving down to Philadelphia for the seminar. Now, instead, we flew in to Boston and drove the fifty miles to Providence, Rhode Island, to visit my grandchildren. My granddaughter Madison had just turned four, and I had only seen her three times. My grandson Austin was 12, and I had not seen him very much either. So I was happy and looking forward to our reunion. Actually we had planned an early Christmas, and the kids were excited. We were bringing lots of presents for them to open. It was a great reunion. Of course, grandmas are allowed to spoil grandchildren and I was no exception. Almost everywhere we went, I indulged them, but a trip to the grocery store proved to be an experience I will never forget. We were in the checkout line, and Austin asked if I would buy him a package of beef jerky. Austin said that it was only a dollar, and I said okay. So I bought three bags–one for Madison, one for Austin, and one for Dale. I remembered eating beef jerky when I was a kid, and I loved it. Madison and Austin were very generous and each offered me several pieces out of their bags. I ended up eating four or five large pieces, but before taking that first bite, I had no inkling of what was about to happen. Within a couple of hours, I had an allergic reaction, and that’s when the nightmare started. My knees swelled up so badly, that I couldn’t bend them. It felt as if bubble wrap had been wound tightly around each of them. My hands and wrists swelled up, too. Now I started experiencing pain in my muscles and joints and this became almost unbearable. No one else who ate the beef jerky had a reaction, just me. 124

When I realized what I had done, I got mad at myself. I told myself that I should have known better, that my immune system was fragile. I also knew that I was very sensitive to preservatives, but I had no idea I would have a reaction like this one. All I could do now was hope the swelling and pain would go away. But it didn’t. It only got worse. I didn’t tell anyone what had happened, because I wanted to leave my grandchildren with positive memories of me. I also didn’t want to spoil our last evening together, because we were catching a flight at six o’clock the next morning to go back to St. Louis. But I’m sorry to say that I was glad to be going home, because I was miserable. From Boston, Dale and I flew in to Chicago, where we transferred planes at O’Hare Airport. It was a very unpleasant and painful experience. O’Hare is huge and spread out, and I had to walk over a mile to another concourse. I barely made it. Of course, Dale didn’t know what was going on and grew impatient. It was obvious that I was in pain, so he finally offered to carry my bag. Greatly relieved, I thanked him and handed it to him. By the time we made it home to Ballwin, I was beyond exhaustion. My knees were still horribly swollen and the pain was excruciating. I didn’t even bother to unpack my bags, and I didn’t even get undressed. Instead, I headed straight for my bed and collapsed into it.



Chapter 29

Is There a Doctor in the House? “Fall down seven times, stand up eight” – A fortune cookie I opened in February 2006 at my favorite Chinese restaurant, China 1st in Ballwin, Missouri That night, to make the pain bearable, I had to lie flat on my back and lay perfectly still. Any movement caused excruciating pain. As I lay there, I scolded myself, thinking what a stupid thing I had done. I should’ve known better. Here, I had just finished Kevin Trudeau’s best seller, Natural Cures “They” Don’t Want You to Know About. In the book, he stated that table salt and food preservatives are toxic to the body. Nevertheless, it was too late now. The damage was done, and I had to live with it. But how? I was reliving the nightmare all over again. The pain was excruciating, just as it had been four years ago. The next day I confessed to Dale what had happened in Providence. Of course, he didn’t believe a single word I was saying–that I had a reaction to nitrites (preservatives). Instead, he thought my rheumatoid arthritis, lupus, or even the Parvo B19 had flared up again. I argued that I knew what “they” felt like, and that this was different. It was now the beginning of January, and the pain still didn’t go away. Instead, it got worse. Trying to sleep at night was impossible. I would toss and turn, trying to find a position that would relieve the throbbing pain in my shoulders, joints and muscles. At that time, I also realized I was in no shape to continue working on this book. It was the last thing on my mind. So I put it aside. What a nightmare I had gotten myself into! Besides damaging my knees, the toxins must have also damaged my arm muscles. It was too painful to even hold or pick up anything over two pounds. My muscles ached! It felt as if I had shoveled heavy snow continuously for days. This time around I knew I was in serious trouble. I still believed, however, that there had to be a reason behind all of this. But as to “why,” I was clueless. I questioned God, “Father, why did this have to happen? What is the purpose? Haven’t I suffered enough. Have mercy on me! I can’t go through this all over again!” 127

By now, it was the middle of January, and I was getting desperate. The pain didn’t let up, and pain killers didn’t help either. Dying didn’t scare me, it was now “how” I was going to die that did. That is when I began seriously thinking about suicide. I told myself God knew I was suffering and would understand and forgive me. I could no longer sleep because of the pain, and I could only stand or walk for a short period of time, before I had to sit down. Even sitting was a problem. My knees and ankles would swell up even more and stiffen, making it difficult to even get up from a chair. Throughout this ordeal, Dale had no sympathy for me whatsoever. Frustrated, he’d yell, “Stop complaining! Go to the doctor! Go to the emergency room!” I’d then yell back, “They can’t help me!” I cried and begged him to drive me down to Alabama to see Dr. Smith, but he wouldn’t. I tried everything I could think of to persuade him. I even told him of my death wish. I told him I was going to kill myself if the pain didn’t stop. This time, he did listen, and that’s when he started taking on my pain. He became stressed out himself, which made him even more crabby. But he still refused to give in and take me to Birmingham. He now was constantly nagging me to go to the doctor, but I stubbornly refused, “I don’t want to go to just any doctor,” I told him. “I want to see Dr. Smith.” One last time, I begged him to take me to Birmingham, but he vehemently refused and said, “No!” Now I had no other choice but to take matters into my own hands. Nobody around me believed me when I told them that my body had been poisoned by preservatives. So I called the one person I believed could help me–Dave,. I was convinced that Dave was the only one who could tell me what was really going on. So on January 16, I called his store and made an appointment for Friday, January 20. During our phone consultation, Dave confirmed that my cells had been poisoned. Of all the previous phone consultations, this one was the scariest. This time, I could sense that Dave was very concerned. He said, “You have viruses in your liver and pancreas. These viruses cause cancer.” Then he said something he had never said to me before. Sounding very serious, he asked, “Do you trust me?” (Note: By the tone of his voice, I knew exactly what he meant. He was asking me if I trusted him with my life.) I answered, “Yes, I do.” He then put together a list of vitamins to send me. 128

Near the end of the phone call, Dave got distracted by the background noise on my end of the line. I explained to him that what he was hearing was my boyfriend, Dale. I told Dave that when my boyfriend found out who I was talking to, he (Dale) was having a fit and was throwing things around in my kitchen. Then Dave started getting a message from spirit about Dale. Dave said, “Your boyfriend loves you very much and is worried about you. He doesn’t understand. He’s with you to protect you, and right now he feels helpless.” I told Dave he was absolutely right. Then I thanked him and asked if I could call him back in a couple of months to see how I was doing. Dave said, “Sure, no charge.” When I got off of the telephone, Dale was furious. He considered calling Dave a waste of money. I defended what I had done by saying that Dave confirmed what had happened to me. “Besides,” I told Dale, “I had no other choice but to call him. I had no one else to turn to.” That’s when **** hit the fan. Frustrated and losing both his patience and his temper, Dale yelled, “What you need is a doctor!” Frustrated, too, I yelled back that my doctor was booked solid for the next three months (which was true), and I couldn’t get an appointment. Dale didn’t “buy into it” and to finally appease him, I agreed to go to an urgent care facility which was similar to a mini-emergency room. My mind was made up, though. I was convinced that no “conventional” doctor could help me. I believed that it was going to be a waste of time and money. That same day we drove over to an urgent care facility close by. We didn’t have to wait long to see the doctor. In fact, they weren’t busy at all, and we got right in. When the doctor sat down to talk to us, I explained to him what had happened–that my tissues had been poisoned by preservatives. I also told him I was in terrible pain. The doctor then looked at me as if I were crazy. Slowly shaking his head, he said, “I can’t help you.” That’s when I got mad and said, “You mean, you’re refusing to help me?” Pausing, he then responded, “No.” Then Dale got involved. Now angry, himself, Dale asked, “You mean, you’re refusing to treat her? Then you’re wasting our time! Let’s get out of here Linda!” That’s when we both stood up and headed for the door. The doctor followed us out to the waiting room, but before walking out the door, Dale’s parting words were chilling. Dale stopped, turned around, and warned the doctor, “You better hope she doesn’t die!” 129

Relieved I had finally won the battle, I knew I was right. These conventional doctors didn’t know anything and couldn’t help me. There was only one doctor who possibly could, and he was in Alabama. As soon as we got back to my house, I called Dr. Smith and explained to him what had happened to me. He then told me to come down that weekend. So, on Friday, the 27th of January, Dale and I packed our bags, got in the car, and headed south one more time for Birmingham, Alabama.


Chapter 30

The Painful Truth January/February 2006

“Pain is temporary, but the lesson is forever” - A fortune cookie I opened in March 2006 My appointment was at 10:00 on Saturday morning in Dr. Smith’s medical office near the University of Alabama campus. On the phone, Dr. Smith suggested that I might need another mild silver protein treatment, which would make it treatment number fifteen. But first, he wanted to run a diagnostic on me. Dr. Smith had told me about this wonderful new diagnostic machine he was using. He called it the “QX” machine. The QX machine is one of the most incredible inventions of the 20th century. I understood exactly what he was talking about, because I believe in quantum physics, too. Each of us has a unique vibration (energy). Each one of us sets his/her vibration at birth. Your vibration depends on the position of the planets, etc., at the time of your birth, and where (latitude and longitude) you are born. The QX machine “reads” a person’s energy, and compares it to stored data in the computer. In addition, each of our organs has a vibration, and this machine can detect if an organ is under stress from disease. The QX machine can also detect other health issues standard medical tests can’t. It can even detect an organism’s vibration. Once we arrived for my appointment, I was immediately “hooked” up to the QX machine. The technician first fastened a thick rubbertype band around my head. She then put smaller bands around each of my wrists and ankles. Each one of these bands was connected to the QX machine by a cable. Once the bands were securely fastened, we were ready to begin the diagnostic. The technician first asked me several questions–the place of my birth, my birth date, and the time of my birth. She then entered this information into the QX machine’s computer. Then I had to keep very still and not talk while the machine was “reading” my energy. During the diagnostic, the technician explained that it took a few minutes for the QX machine to run the diagnostic. The computer was 131

hooked up to a projector screen (instead of a monitor) which allowed all of us to view the findings. Overall, the entire session took around forty-five minutes to one hour. The QX machine’s diagnosis was similar to Dave’s. It, too, detected a virus in my liver! At the top of the QX’s “critical” list was: (1) food poisoning; (2) heavy metal poisoning; (3) the Zaire virus; (4) rheumatoid arthritis; and (5) a vitamin deficiency. All in all, the QX machine proved that I was definitely one “sick puppy.” Up until now, no one had believed me when I told them that I had been poisoned by preservatives. Even with the results up on the screen right before his very eyes, Dale still didn’t want to believe it. Now I was ready to get my 15th treatment of mild silver protein. As soon as the treatment was over (around two hours), I immediately reacted to the kill-off. Fortunately, I had nothing in my stomach. I started to tremble and shake with chills and fever. My back began to ache, too, feeling as if I were having “back labor.” For the next two hours, I sat in a lounge chair in Dr. Smith’s treatment room with a heating pad behind my back and two blankets covering me. Then by five o’clock, the flu-like symptoms (Herxheimer effect) started to fade. And by this time, I was totally exhausted. But, at the same time, greatly relieved, because I knew there had been a big kill-off. I was smart enough to realize the battle wasn’t over. The treatment only kills organisms which are present in the bloodstream. The organisms still “hiding” safely in my cells were protected. I knew more treatments would be necessary. When Dale and I returned to the hotel later that evening, all I wanted to do was sleep. It had been a long day for me, and I was exhausted. Over the next three months, I received four more treatments of mild silver protein, making it a grand total of nineteen treatments in all. My reaction to the kill-off from the nineteenth treatment was mild. I now felt I could relax, feeling certain that my problems were over, but I was wrong again. The swelling and pain in my joints and muscles didn’t go away. This was confusing. After fourteen mild silver protein treatments in 2005, my lupus and rheumatoid arthritis had gone into total remission. At the same time, the pain in my muscles and joints had disappeared, too. 132

Now, the only explanation left was that my cells were still poisoned and damaged from the preservatives. This could also explain the inflamation. I did get a chance to ask the technician in Dr. Smith’s office if toxins could damage and stay in the cells, and she had replied, “Yes.” She then suggested I “detox.” Unfortunately, I still had a reason to be worried. From researching and reading many articles, I discovered that sodium nitrite (a meat preservative) is a carcinogen and causes cancer. So, if the mild silver protein treatment didn’t work and I needed to “detox,” my cells, what do I do now?


Chapter 31

Gentlemen! Start Your Search Engines May 2006

“Ask and it shall be given to you; seek and ye shall find; knock and it shall be opened unto you.” — Jesus, Matthew 7:7 It was now May, and I had to assume that my body’s tissues were poisoned from toxins. I also had to assume my diagnosis was “precancer.” This was based on the results of the QX machine and Dave. I was now pretty scared. Even Dave had indirectly told me I was in danger. All I knew was that I had to get busy and find an alternative treatment to kill the viruses before they killed me. In the meantime, I also had to find a way to “detox” my tissues. I now believed toxins were the cause of the excruciating pain in my joints and muscles. By now, I realized that the mild silver protein treatments were not effective against viruses. During the visit in Birmingham, Dr. Smith’s wife had mentioned that they had not been successful in treating Hepatitis with mild silver protein. To me, this was a confirmation that mild silver protein was not the answer I was looking for to kill viruses. Could this be because viruses have a tough protein cell wall, whereas mycoplasma is encased in only a double membrane? According to researchers, silver kills a microorganism by binding to the organism, thus disrupting its metabolic mechanism and structure. Is mycoplasma more vulnerable to MSP because of its flimsy permeable membrane? I believe the answer is yes. Mycoplasma is more vulnerable to mild silver protein because it has no “true” cell wall to protect it. Believing that the mild silver protein treatments were no longer working for me, I had to come up with an alternative treatment to fight the viruses. Off and on, I had meditated trying to get an answer to what to do next. I finally came to the conclusion that the answer had already been given to me. For the past five years, I had been haunted by the December 2001 trip to Sedona. That was the trip where I had asked God, “Why did I get sick?” I remember Marla channeling to me that I got sick because


I wanted to heal myself. These words made no sense then, but now they took on a whole new meaning. So, do I trust God to lead me to the “cure” so I can heal myself? Or do I choose to continue with what I was doing–getting MSP treatments? I knew I had to make a decision soon before there would be no more choices left to take. And in my mind, there was really only one option to take–to go ahead and trust God and heal myself. However, there was just one obstacle in my way–Dale. When I told Dale that I planned to heal myself, he told me I was crazy. Of course, he didn’t believe in the QX machine or in Dave. He still believed that I had the Parvo B19 virus and that I would die without some kind of conventional medical treatment. We argued for days about a treatment, but I firmly stood my ground. I told him my mind was made up. I also told him I was not going to take chemotherapy or prescription drugs ever again. “God is going to show me the way,” I defiantly declared, “and I’m going to heal myself!” At that moment, Dale just gave up. He realized he could never talk me out of something once my mind was made up. Besides, he knew I was as stubborn as a mule. On the other hand, I was just as frustrated. I could not understand why Dale did not believe and trust in God the way I did. For the past three years, he had witnessed all of the miracles in my life. Why couldn’t he trust and believe in miracles now? Why was he still a “Doubting Thomas?” I admit I do go out of bounds with my sense of humor sometimes, and I didn’t help the situation any by throwing more gasoline on the fire. But after telling Dale of my decision, I had to get the last word in by saying, “Well, when all is said and done, you’ll either become a believer or my pallbearer!” Then I put a “hold” on my life and began searching the “Net”for an alternative “cure” for cancer. 136

Chapter 32

It’s No Acid-ent Why Some People Do Not Get Sick My yard was once infested with moles. An exterminator came out to my house and said, “Lady, to get rid of moles, you need to get rid of their food source (beetle larvae). Once you get rid of their food source, the moles will either starve to death or leave and go somewhere else.” This time I put another extra special request out to the Universe. I said, “Father, lead me to the alternative cure for cancer. Thank you.” So in May, I began searching and reading alternative medical books and articles and surfed the “Net” to find the cure. When I began searching, I was led down an incredible path of discovery and enlightenment. I guess I was supposed to start with the basics, because the first revelation, the first step I came upon was “why people are sick today.” I consider the information in this chapter to be very important and is the foundation to staying healthy and keeping from getting sick. The information in this chapter is not a secret. I’m sure many people, including researchers and experts, already knew the answer to this “mystery” long before I stumbled upon it, but no one, to my knowledge, has ever tried to put it into simple words that the average person can understand. The following is based on the evidence I gathered. For a more detailed and scientific explanation, please read a few of the reference books listed in my Bibliography section. Otherwise, the following is a very (and I mean very) simplified explanation as to why so many people are so sick today: It all begins with the food we eat and its pH. The pH (potential hydrogen) in the food we eat is determined by its mineral content. A mineral’s pH is classified as either alkaline or acid. (Being classified as acidic has nothing to do with how it tastes–sour or bitter.) Alkaline minerals, to name a few, are calcium, manganese, magnesium, sodium, and potassium, and are found only in fruits, 137

vegetables and certain nuts (almonds). Acid minerals are phosphorous, sulphur, chlorine, iodine, bromine, fluorine, copper and silicon, to name a few, and are found in meat, grains, nuts, soda, coffee, tea, preservatives, and all processed foods. When our cells burn food to make energy, not everything is burned. Minerals (consider them to be fragments of rocks) in the food we eat do not burn and are left as residual ash in the body’s tissues and blood. Everyone has heard the phrase “You are what you eat!” This is absolutely true. The human body’s pH is determined and measured by the mineral residue in the blood and tissues. When the body is healthy and in perfect balance, its pH is alkaline, around 7.3 to 7.45, meaning there is a higher concentration of alkaline minerals in the blood and tissues than acidic minerals. Potential hydrogen (pH) is measured on a 0-14 scale (below). Any measurement below 7 is considered acidic. Any measurement above 7 is considered alkaline. Also, the closer the measurement is to zero, the greater the concentration of acidic minerals. On the other side of the scale, the closer the measurement is to 14, the greater the concentration of alkaline minerals. If the measurement is 7, the pH is neutral, neither acid nor alkaline. Human body (~7.3-7.45)

014 Acid Neutral Alkaline (Distilled Water) For example, soda’s pH is around 1.75-2.5 (depending on the brand), which means it contains an extremely high concentration of acidic minerals. On the other hand, distilled water’s pH is “neutral” (around 7), neither acid nor alkaline. This means that the mineral concentration in the water has an equal amount of both acidic minerals and alkaline minerals. It must also be noted that alkaline and acidic minerals “bind” to each other, thus neutralizing each other. When this “binding” occurs, the pH becomes neutral, neither acid nor alkaline. Just like the Universe (which must stay in perfect balance) so, too, must the human body’s pH stay in perfect balance to remain healthy. There are several mechanisms in the body which make this possible.


The first mechanism is what is referred to as the “great alkaline reserve,” which keeps the blood’s pH in perfect balance (alkaline). For every action, there is a reaction! When we eat too much food containing high concentrations of acidic minerals, the body reacts by calling upon its “great alkaline reserve.” Stored alkaline minerals are then released in the blood and“bind” to the acidic minerals, thus neutralizing them. This causes the blood’s pH to stabilize and return to perfect balance–an alkaline pH of 7.3 to 7.45. Too much acidic mineral residue in the human tissues is toxic! To bring the body’s tissues back to balance, there is another mechanism the body relies on–sweating. Our ancestors worked outside toiling in the hot sun, sweating out the toxins through the skin. Unfortunately, this is not the case today. We live in air conditioned houses, drive air conditioned cars, and exercise in air conditioned gymnasiums. We avoid sweating! Our ancestors also had an advantage over us. They did not have to contend with pollution, heavy metals, pesticides, herbicides, preservatives and many other chemicals, which are toxic to our cells. If these poisons are not sweated out, they remain in the cells and cause the cells to become “unbalanced.” The cell’s pH then becomes acidic. Besides using the above two mechanisms, the body has another way of ridding itself of too much acidic mineral waste. It releases acidic minerals through the kidneys and the colon. For our ancestors, this was ideal. Their diet consisted of large quantities of fruits, whole grains, vegetables, seeds, etc., which made elimination a quick process. However, today it’s a different story. Most Americans’ diets consist of large quantities of highly processed foods and meat, which contain a high concentration of acidic minerals and are also very constipating. We also do not drink enough water. Thus, the elimination process is slowed down tremendously. When the elimination process slows down, the colon then has a chance to reabsorb the toxins and put them right back into circulation, where they go right back into the tissues. Finally, if the cells in our bodies are “unbalanced” (acidic pH), this is when we become vulnerable to disease and cancer. When we are told, “Eat your fruits and vegetables!” it’s not just about getting our daily vitamin requirements. According to some experts, for the body to stay in perfect “balance,” 80 percent of a person’s diet must consist of food containing alkaline minerals and the remaining 20 percent consist of food containing acid minerals. (NOTE: 139

Go to the end of the next chapter, Food for Thought, to read about an ideal healthy eating plan I recommend and follow myself.) Some nutritionists believe that it is the food we eat that is causing disease and cancer. In fact, they are right on the money. The food we eat is an important co-factor of whether we stay healthy or whether we get sick. But there’s something more to it than that. Maybe it is being suppressed, or maybe it is just being overlooked, or maybe it is being kept secret from the “public,” but the real cause of disease and cancer is micro-organisms. Then why have I written and placed so much emphasis on the body staying alkaline and balanced? What do micro-organisms have to do with balance and alkalinity? Answer: It’s because cancer (viruses) and other disease-causing micro-organisms (mycoplasma) cannot thrive in alkaline (balanced) tissues. They can only thrive and flourish in “unbalanced” (acidic pH) cells weakened from the toxins from highly processed food and too much acidic mineral residue! Is it no wonder then why so many people are sick today? Obviously, the food we choose to eat does play an important role in whether we stay healthy or whether we die from disease and cancer! Today, due to the environment and the food we eat, our immune systems are weak, too. On the other hand, mycoplasma and viruses are growing stronger. Micro-organisms constantly monitor our pH and our immune system. They only attack us when we are down–when the situation is “right” and in their favor–when our defenses are weak and our cells are “unbalanced!!” I found most of my statistics through the media, and I can safely guesstimate that today the majority of Americans are quite ill. Skeptical? You’re on the right path. Skepticism is the first step in uncovering the truth. In the 1980's, American hospitals were downsizing. The opposite is true today. Every hospital in the USA, along with the rest of the healthcare industry, is experiencing tremendous growth! Economics (the law of supply and demand) is the proof. Just count the number of drug commercials on TV! Today, all new jobs being created are in healthcare. According to a September 2006 Business Week article, the healthcare industry is now supporting the American economy! I’m afraid to say the following is true: “Death is now walking the Earth!”


Chapter 33

Food for Thought Question: What did the Boy Sprout Leader say to the new Cub Sprout recruits during inspection? Answer: You sprouts still look a little “seedy.” Go back and take another shower and rinse off one more time! The first table contains the powerful effects vegetables can have on our overall health and well being. The second, third and fourth tables represent the alkaline and acid mineral content (measurement) of some basic foods we consume.




For the “perfect diet” (actually not a diet but a nutritious way of eating), I recommend The Zone, a program created by Dr. Barry Sears. Amazingly, his program promotes both cell balance (alkaline pH) and hormonal balance (oops...there’s that word “balance” again) which, of course, is absolutely essential if one wishes to maintain good health and stay disease-free. Further, The Zone is not impossible to adhere to, and Dr. Sears explains in very simple terms the “why’s” in his book(s). Not only will you lose or maintain weight sensibly but you will never feel hungry again! This is the plan I follow, and I love it. Thank you Dr. Sears!!


Chapter 34

The Answer to the Million Dollar Question– Why Do I Feel So Tired and So Sick? “Never get your truth from just one source” A mycoplasma infection is a disease of humans which presents with many symptoms including: # Chronic fatigue which is unrelieved by rest # (Fibromyalgia) Trigger points at some 18 points of the body which when placed under pressure elicit severe pain # Chronic headaches and frequent bouts of nausea # Hyper sensitivity to temperature and barometric changes # Cognitive problems associated with “brain fog” # Short-term memory loss # Emotional imbalance and endocrine imbalance # Serological dysfunction including circulatory disruption and reduced blood volume # Reproductive system problems which may include loss of libido, endometriosis, and spontaneous abortion # Frequent bouts of generalized pain Bi-polar depression (along with many other diseases) is caused by an organism known as mycoplasma. The mycoplasma is a product of evolutionary bacterial degeneration (pleomorphism). Bacteria are life forms that ingest nutrients, take up oxygen and reproduce themselves. Bacteria reach a point when they break up and dump their organelles into other life forms, but in some cases part of the bacteria nucleic acids will survive and seek out a shelter within a new host and there awaits its further destiny. This particle of nucleic acid is similar to a virus except that the latter generates a protective coat for itself. The mycoplasma, on the other hand, has no protective protein coat and no cell wall. It is encased in a double cell membrane. This nucleic acid, the mycoplasma, hidden within a host, apparently does no harm until aroused by some type of trauma such as 145

a car accident, a fall, or even the birth of a baby, at which point it will begin the uptake of pre-formed sterols from the host. Ultimately, the cell will lose enough sterols (including cholesterol) that it dies and then the dead cell dumps its contents into the blood and plasma. The mycoplasma, in the meantime, has manufactured useless protein fibers called fibrillary tangles which characterize the brains of scrapieinfected sheep and is also found in the brains of Alzheimer and Huntington victims. It is also found in the heart muscles of autopsied CFS victims. (NOTE: Mycoplasma can exist in an inert form called a crystal or it can convert to a liquid state under certain conditions of concentration, pressure, temperature, pH, and it also can participate in metabolic processes in plants, animals and humans.) There are over 200 species of mycoplasma, seven of which are found in humans. The mycoplasma derived from the bacteria brucellia abortus DNA is also called mycoplasma fermentans or in cognito. It is this disease agent that cause fibromyalgia, bi-polar depression, Alzheimer’s, Parkinson’s, ALS, and many other auto-immune diseases. First of all, the mycoplasma fermentans is taken into the body by aerosol, the food chain, or fluid transfer. Once in the body, the mycoplasma accesses genetically accepted host cells where it hides until roused by some kind of trauma. When roused the mycoplasma begins to uptake pre-formed sterols (including cholesterol) from its host cell eventually killing it and leaving in the cell’s place a lesion. Then the killed cell ruptures and dumps its contents(along with the mycoplasma) and glutamate into the blood and plasma. The glutamate (GGA) is neutralized by the body uptaking an ammonia ion from molecules of urea. During the process of converting glutamate into glutamine (CGA) a cyanide ion is released. The cyanide ion then accesses the neighboring cells where it focuses on the battery of the cell called the mitochondria. At the fourth complex of the Kreb’s cycle the cyanide uptakes the energy generated. This then deprives the cell of its energy and thus the symptom presents as chronic fatigue. There’s still more damage as in the case of fibromyalgia: The dumped mycoplasma in fluid form is carried in the blood stream until at points in the body where there is a marked reduction in pressure due to arterial branching, the mycoplasma then converts to a minute crystalline form. These crystals will present with no discomfort until pressure is applied–hence the “trigger points.” 146

There are more secondary and tertiary signs and symptoms which present as a consequence of the mycoplasma. For example, the dysfunctioning of the hypothalamic/pituitary/adrenal/thyroid axis as follows: Cholesterol is one of the pre-formed sterols that a roused mycoplasma of certain species can uptake. Also, cholesterol is an essential prerequisite to the generation of the secretory hormones which carry the messages necessary to the maintenance of the body’s metabolic balance. The sequence is: co-enzyme A6squalene6cholesterol6hormone If this sequence is disrupted by the mycoplasma’s uptake of preformed sterols (cholesterol) then the downstream production of various hormones is interfered with and the signals such as the hypothalamic regulation of sleep or body temperature are lost presenting with two more critical symptoms of a mycoplasma infection: irregular sleep patterns and extreme sensitivity to temperature. AUTHOR’S NOTE; The information in this chapter was gathered from the Common Cause Medical Research Foundation Journal(s). If not for this wonderful organization, I would never have become knowledgeable about mycoplasma and how it works. By the way, it’s no coincidence that you are reading this book. Maybe at some point in your life you’ve asked yourself, “What can I do to make a difference in the world?” Here’s the opportunity you’ve been waiting for. This book is called “The Messenger” for a reason. This book’s title refers to you! You are “The Messenger” when you pass the information in this book on to others. You will also have found a purpose and will save many lives. 147


Chapter 35

The Verdict’s In September 2006

Many Christians believe that the battle of Armageddon will be fought against an enemy on foreign soil. BUT, in reality, could the final battle of Armageddon be fought within each and every one of us against an enemy we cannot see—micro-organisms? It was now the beginning of September, and I still had not found the next step–an alternative treatment to kill the viruses in my body. I had changed my diet, but was that enough to fight off the viruses? I would soon find out, because I had another appointment to see my doctor on September 11. My doctors’ appointment was fine, except I was disappointed that I had not made better progress. I couldn’t lie to my doctor and tell him I was no longer experiencing pain in my joints and muscles, because I was. Afterwards, my blood was drawn, and now all I could do was wait for the test results, which would reveal what was really going on. Finally, after two weeks, my doctor’s followup letter and blood test results arrived in the mail. There was both good news and bad news. The good news was that everything was fine–the RA and lupus were still in remission. But, the bad news was that my “sed” (sediment) rate was very high–68. (Normal “sed” rate is #30. A “sed” rate of 68 meant inflammation and possibly infection going on somewhere in the body.) (See Exhibit 9, Medical Records) I was also disappointed by his letter. He wrote about his concerns and requested I come back in to his office in two weeks to get my “sed” rate checked again. (Note: In the back of my mind I was concerned that my doctor would put me on immune-suppressing drugs.) But, it was September 21, and I needed to know NOW how I was doing, and again, there was only one person I trusted who could give me the answer–Dave. Only he could tell me what was really going on. So that same morning I picked up the phone and called Dave’s store to make an appointment. I called his store at approximately 11:45 EST. When I asked the employee who answered the phone if 149

Dave had any appointments open, he told me Dave was booked solid through next week. Just then, a woman in the background butted in, saying that they had just gotten a cancellation for the twelve o’clock appointment. Was this a coincidence or what? The employee then asked if I wanted the twelve o’clock appointment and I eagerly said, “Yes!” He then put me on hold, but I didn’t have to wait long. Dave got on the line at 11:50. Dave and I hadn’t talked in eight months. And just as I had anticipated, as soon as Dave and I exchanged greetings, he immediately started channeling. Dave said, “I’m getting that you still have viruses attacking you. Dave then said he had the vitamins that would help me, at which time he began putting a list together. While he was doing this, I asked him about Dale. He said, “Your boyfriend has the same viruses you do, and he’s even sicker than you are.” I then told Dave, “My boyfriend doesn’t listen to me, and he won’t change his diet. All he eats is fast food and no fruit and no vegetables.” Dave then said the following: “Don’t worry, by February, he’ll be begging you to help him.” As I sat quietly listening, I wasn’t surprised at Dave’s prediction. I could tell Dale was sick, too, although his symptoms were different than mine. (Note: Dale was complaining even more about headaches and nausea. He also had red boil-like hives on his face and chest.) Then Dave began channeling again. This time the message cheered me up. He said, “You are going to write two more books and will see yourself go through an explosive (spiritual) growth before you start the third one.” When I heard this, I was greatly relieved, because I knew they (spirit) were trying to tell me that I was going to survive this crisis. Then Dave stopped channeling, and we began discussing current events. We talked about why so many people are sick today. I asked him if he knew anything about a new disease called Morgellon’s, He answered, “Yes.” I then asked him if it was a virus, and he said no. I then asked him if it was a bacteria, and again, he said no. I was out of guesses and finally said, “What is it then? It’s the strangest thing I’ve ever read about or seen pictures of. There are fibers coming out of lesions on these peoples’ bodies!” Dave then said it was a new kind of organism, that it was “plant-like” and lived under the skin. He commented that the organism “seeds” itself through the lesions. At


the end of this particular conversation, we both agreed that this was a horrible disease. I then asked him, “How do the Illuminati keep from getting sick?” He answered, “They use machines.” The word “machines” was a new one for me. But I didn’t get a chance to ask what he meant, because Dave informed me that our appointment had to end. He explained that it was now one o’clock and his next appointment was waiting on the other line. How fast the hour and ten minutes had gone by! Reluctantly, I agreed and said, “Thanks.” Then I told Dave I would keep in touch. Now, there was one more person I had to call–someone who might have more answers–Dr. Smith. When I called Dr. Smith and told him the bad news, that I was still fighting viruses, he remarked, “Sounds like you need the Rife machine!” When Dr. Smith said the word “machine,” my ears perked up. I wondered, “Could this be the machine Dave was referring to? Could this be what the Illuminati use to keep from getting sick?” I then asked Dr. Smith, “Rife machine? What’s a Rife machine?” He then explained that the Rife machine uses electrical pulses to kill micro-organisms. He went on to say that it was invented over 70 years ago and research had proved that it works. This explanation was good enough for me, so I asked him how much it cost. When he told me, at first, I misunderstood him and said I couldn’t afford it. Laughing, he said that it was too bad, because it even had a setting for mycoplasma. After I thought about it for a few seconds, I asked him again, “How much did you say it cost? This time I understood him and it was affordable. Now trusting Dr. Smith’s judgment, I told him, “Okay, go ahead and order me one. I’m going to try it.” After the phone call, I sat at my kitchen table wondering if I had done the right thing. I asked myself, “Could this be just another coincidence that Dave had mentioned ‘machines’ and then right out of the blue Dr. Smith mentions the Rife machine?” Using a combination of both Dave’s vitamins and the Rife machine, could this be enough to kill the viruses that were attacking me? AUTHOR’S NOTE: After the session with Dave, I did not tell Dale that he was being attacked by the same viruses that were attacking me. Even if I had, he would never have believed me.



Chapter 36

Good Vibrations November 2006

There is nothing concealed that will not be discovered - Matthew 10:26 Now I believed that my request had manifested. God had revealed to me the next (Note: actually the second) step–an alternative treatment to kill the viruses which were attacking me. In November the Rife machine finally arrived. When I had ordered the machine, Dr. Smith had instructed me to carefully read the two Rife manuals before using it. As I was reading through the manuals, I was amazed by what the manufacturer claimed the machine could do–kill organisms through frequency (vibrations). I must also add that the manufacturer clearly stated that the machine was not approved by the FDA, and it was purely experimental and for personal use only. To fully appreciate the Rife machine, I acquainted myself with its inventor, Dr. Royal Rife. In my opinion he is one of the most brilliant inventors in medical history, but his invention and contributions to the field of medicine have been kept buried and suppressed for over 70 years. Not until recently, has his technology resurfaced to be used for what it was originally intended to be used for–to kill micro-organisms. Not only was Dr. Rife a genius, but he was also a gentle soul who was dedicated and determined to find the cure for disease and cancer. Unfortunately, even though he proved his invention worked, his methods were so far ahead of his time, that the medical establishment rejected them. When I set out to learn more about Dr. Rife and his incredible invention, the Rife machine, his story fascinated me. The following information has been gathered from either my Rife manual or from the Internet: In the 1920's, Dr. Rife’s ideas proved to be far ahead of his time. He proved that every organism has its own individual frequency (vibration). Later, he would discover that an organism is sensitive to its own specific frequency and could be killed by intensifying its own particular frequency until the organism explodes. (Picture a human 153

voice shattering a glass.) To kill the micro-organisms using vibration, Rife invented what he referred to as a “frequency tube,” which is a primitive version of today’s Rife machine. Dr. Rife encountered many obstacles, one of them being that none of the microscopes in the 1920's could view a virus. At that time, it was impossible. Using white-light microscopes, micro-organisms become invisible. Also, if an organism is stained with a chemical to be able to see it, the chemical kills it. This was not feasible for Dr. Rife. To prove that his invention worked, not only did he have to see the organism, but the organism had to be alive so he could try and kill it. So, before he could even prove his “frequency tube” worked, he had to invent a microscope powerful enough to see a “live” virus. By the 1930's, Dr. Rife had accomplished the impossible! He built the first virus microscope, which was capable of magnifying objects 60,000 times their normal size. Amazingly, using his invention, Rife was the first human being to see a “live” virus. How was this possible–to see a once invisible organism? Again, organisms are invisible under regular white-light microscopes, but the theory behind Rife’s microscope was that each type of micro-organism became visible in a unique color of its own when it was exposed to the color frequency that resonated with its own unique vibration. Using a spectroscope, Dr. Rife then painstakingly identified each individual frequency of each known microbe. With this task finally completed, he was now ready to prove his “frequency tube” worked. By slowly rotating the crystal prisms and focusing light on the organism under his virus microscope, amazingly, Dr. Rife was at last able to see “live” micro-organisms invading human cells! Then, with the organisms now in his sights, they became “sitting ducks.” Using his frequency tube, he then “blasted” the organisms with their own intensified frequency, instantly exploding and killing them. His theory and invention worked! He had proved his machine killed organisms that cause disease and cancer. Unfortunately, life was not too kind to Dr. Rife. Shortly thereafter, all of his equipment and documentation were destroyed. Then, sadly, after many years of persecution and abuse, Dr. Rife’s life was destroyed, too. Suffering from alcoholism, he died in 1971. My machine came with thin metal “plates” which hooked up to the machine through cables. It took several days of reading the Rife manuals and experimenting with the machine before I felt comfortable 154

using it. I then used the plates to localize my treatment, concentrating on my liver and pancreas. I followed the same strategy that Dr. Rife did. He determined that a patient needed a three-day recovery period between treatments. He had found that it took three days for the body to heal and rid itself of the toxins. By now, it was the end of November. Although I believed the machine was working (killing the viruses), the pain in my joints and muscles had not diminished. Making matters worse, my “sed” rate was still very high–68. Ultimately, the Rife machine hadn’t lowered my “sed” rate, and I knew I needed something else. But what? Time was running out–my next doctor’s appointment was in two weeks (December 11). I also realized that if my “sed” rate wasn’t down by then that my doctor would either force me to take drugs or tell me to “hit the road” and find another doctor. Because of my high “sed” rate, it was obvious that my cells were still “unbalanced” and I realized I still had to get the “poisons” out. But how? I had tried everything. I had taken pills which supposedly would “detox” my body, but they didn’t work. I ate alkaline food and I drank plenty of water, but that didn’t work either. I was still in pain. Every book I read, every website I visited, even my Rife manual, they all had one common denominator–to achieve perfect balance–flush the tissues! But I had tried! I had followed everyone’s advice, but it now looked as if I were going to fail. There was nothing left for me to try or do. It was now December 1. As I sat at my computer, I tried to force myself to write more of my story. I had just written the chapter about why people are sick, but I just couldn’t get motivated to continue. I should have been excited about finding the Rife machine, but instead, I was depressed. Frustrated and almost in tears. I reminded myself that I had done everything “right” the past year, but my knees were still swollen, full of toxins, and my muscles still ached. With very little hope left and feeling as if I had failed, I asked myself, “Is this the end of the road? All that I’ve been through–has it been for nothing?” Still sitting at my computer, without even thinking, I began to pray, crying out, “Father, help me! What’s left for me to do? I’ve tried everything! How can I lower my “sed” rate? How can I “detox” my body?”


AUTHOR’S NOTE: As I sat there praying, little did I know that the answer had already been given to me. For the past three months, it had been sitting there right in front of my face. Now it was about to be revealed to me–the third and final step–the ultimate solution to achieving perfect cell balance and the secret to longevity. But after all, doesn’t synchronicity and enlightenment go hand-inhand? Maybe three months ago, I would not have appreciated or been able to grasp the full magnitude of “The Magic Bullet.”


Chapter 37

The Magic Bullet December 2006

Now I know how Dorothy felt in The Wizard of Oz. I, too, travel down a road trying to find my way back (to perfect health). Along the way, I gain much knowledge, and with the help of my friends, finally make it to the end of the road, only to come up empty handed. Then, just when I’m ready to give up, I learn that I’ve had the answer all along. It was always just a “click” away. Just then, I got a flashback. I began recalling a story Patrick, a friend, had told me back in September. Patrick knew I was into “health” and told me I might be interested in his story. He had met a woman, who gave foot baths. Patrick said at first he didn’t believe what the woman claimed the foot baths could do, so he decided to try it out for himself. Patrick said he couldn’t believe his eyes. Sitting in a chair with his bare feet in a tub of warm water, she put a small electrical device in the tub of water. Patrick said, “Linda, you wouldn’t believe all this “black stuff” that came out of my feet into the water in just 30 minutes!” Patrick then said, “Linda, you might be interested in this.” I then asked Patrick for the lady’s phone number, but he didn’t have it on him, so I asked if he would e-mail it to me. When I got Patrick’s email, I was very busy, and without even thinking, I filed it away in my e-mail folders. After that, I never gave it another thought, because Dale and I were getting ready to leave the next day for a vacation in Williamsburg. Then, no sooner had we returned from that trip, then one week later we left for a two-week vacation in Florida. Finally, by the first of November, we had gotten back from Florida, but now I was all “wrapped up” in the Rife machine. Unfortunately, I had long forgotten about the woman who gave the mysterious foot baths. As I sat there, I got the feeling that maybe this could be the answer I was looking for, but I couldn’t remember if I had saved Patrick’s email. Even if I had, I couldn’t remember where I had filed it. So, one by one, I opened each of my e-mail folders and, lo and behold, there it was. I had never even opened it. When I clicked on it, there it was–the 157

lady’s phone number. I immediately got on the phone and dialed her number. It was in the middle of the day, and, surprisingly, she answered. I introduced myself and asked her if she was the lady who gave the foot baths. She said she was, and then I told her that I got her name through a friend of mine by the name of Patrick. She then introduced herself as Donna. Dying of curiosity, I asked her how the machine worked and what it did. She then began by telling me how it had affected her own life. Donna, over the years, had developed osteoarthritis. She had aches and pains in her joints. She had heard about a “miraculous” foot bath machine at a spa in Dallas and decided to try it out. Within two months of treatments, her painful arthritis had magically disappeared. Six months ago she had moved to St. Louis and had started experiencing pain from her osteoarthritis all over again. However, this time she couldn’t find anyone in St. Louis who had the foot bath machine, so she bought one from a Dallas distributor and started giving herself the treatment. Once again, her painful arthritis disappeared. The following is Donna’s description of what the (foot bath) machine does: The ion cleanse machine is a holistic way of approaching disease through saturation of the blood, tissues, cells and organs with ions. These treatments are based on ionization of water and osmosis to draw toxins from the body. The ion cleanse machine produces negative hydrogen ions in the water and these act as both an energy carrier and as an antioxidant in the human body. Many users claim it: ! ! ! ! ! ! !

Enhances body detoxification and helps lose weight Inactivates viruses, bacteria, yeast, and fungus Reduces pain and inflammation and relieves tension Slows down many conditions associated with old age Purifies blood and lymph and chelates heavy metals Increases energy Stimulates the immune system

After learning what the ion cleanse machine did, I was convinced it could help me. I asked her how soon I could come over and get a foot bath, and she said she had an opening the very next day. I asked if I could bring my boyfriend along, and she said it was okay.


That night when I told Dale about the ion cleanse machine, he wasn’t impressed. I was just the opposite. I could hardly wait until the next day. (Note: Even though he didn’t show any enthusiasm about going with me, I still think he was curious.) The ion cleanse machine was exactly as Patrick had described. I sat on her kitchen chair and put my feet in a rectangular tub of warm tap water. Donna then added one-fourth teaspoon of sea salt to the water and turned the machine on. As I sat there watching the tiny bubbles coming up off of the plates, my water slowly began to change color. Within ten minutes, the water had turned a light brown. As the minutes passed by, the water started getting darker and darker, until the water went from dark brown to black. By the end of the session, the tub’s water was filled with a dark brownish black scum-like sludge. Even more amazing, while I was sitting there, I swear I could feel the pain in my knees lessening. When the foot bath was over, I was able to get up from the chair without experiencing too much pain. I also had a feeling of “lightness.” I told Donna I felt “euphoric.” Knowingly, she just smiled and nodded her head in agreement. As Dale and I drove home, he surprisingly commented that he had actually seen the swelling in my knees go down! And Dale would never have admitted that or made it up. In fact, he was a skeptic and had watched my session closely. He would have liked to have been able to scream, “Fraud!” On the other hand, from that moment on, I was a believer in what this ion cleanse machine could do, and I could hardly wait until my next session. After my second foot bath, I decided I had to get one for myself and bought one through Donna, who was a distributor. When I received my machine on the 10th of December, I immediately gave myself another treatment. Afterwards, I felt so good! There is no greater feeling than cleansing the tissues of toxins and debris! I laughed when I told Dale, “If people used this machine, no one would need alcohol or cigarettes or use illegal drugs ever again to feel relaxed.” However, no matter how hard I tried, I couldn’t persuade Dale to try the machine. He would have nothing to do with it.


I, too, noticed my knees were significantly less swollen. Did this mean my “sed” rate had gone down, too? I would soon find out after my December 11 appointment with my RA specialist. Within ten days after my doctor’s appointment, the letter with the blood test results arrived. Happy news! My “sed” rate did drop 13 points. It had dropped from 68 to 55. (See Exhibit 10, Medical Records.) And to think it did this just after three treatments! What would it do after several months of treatments? I am convinced that the ion cleanse machine is the secret to longevity and also the solution to achieving perfect cell “balance!” According to my Rife machine manual (which does not reference the ion cleanse machine) a famous researcher’s experiment proved how important it is to “flush” the tissues to stay healthy and live a longer life: THE CARREL EXPERIMENT Dr. Alexis Carrel was a Nobel prize winning doctor and medical researcher at the Rockefeller Institute for Medical Research. Dr. Carrel produced one of the most incredible experiments in medical history. On January 17, 1912, Dr. Carrel took chicken embryo heart tissue and immersed it in a solution containing nutrients. Each day, the solution was changed (flushed), taking away the waste products and leaving behind fresh nutrients. Dr. Carrel predicted these cells could be kept alive forever. Funny, the chick cells outlived Dr. Carrel. The cells lived for more than 32 years. This is extraordinary, because a normal chicken only lives around seven years. Further, the only reason the cells finally died was when a technician stopped “flushing” the tissues. Even Dr. Rife in the 1920's had something to say about the correlation between an “unbalanced” cell and disease. The following quote appears in The Cancer Cure That Worked written by Barry Lynes: “In reality, it is not the bacteria themselves that produce the disease, but the chemical constituents of these microorganisms enacting upon the unbalanced cell metabolism of the human body that in actuality produce the disease. We also believe if the metabolism of the human body is perfectly balanced or poised, it is susceptible to no disease.” 160

Even Dr. Rife in the 1920's realized how important balance and pH are to the cell’s overall good health. Again, a “balanced” cell’s pH is alkaline, and organisms cannot thrive in an alkaline environment. This is why the ion cleanse machine is so important. The ion cleanse machine “pulls” toxins and acidic mineral waste out of the tissues through the lymph system, leaving the tissues (cells) “balanced,” meaning they have an alkaline pH. The following are just a few testimonials of how the ion cleanse machine has had a positive effect on a few people’s lives (including my own): A Diabetic’s Story A woman who had diabetes started the ion cleanse machine treatments. She also changed her eating habits, giving up soda and eating a balanced diet. After several months of treatments, she went to her doctor who told her that her diabetic symptoms were gone. He told her, “Whatever you’re doing, keep doing it!” Jan’s Story Jan has a painful case of fibromyalgia and osteoarthritis. She was in such terrible pain, that to be able to sleep, she had to lie motionless like a mummy flat on her back (no pillow), with her arms straight at her sides. Just after using the ion cleanse machine one time, she felt immediate relief. Now, after receiving more treatments, she claims that the pain in her joints and shoulders is now “bearable.” My Story Ever since my tissues had been “poisoned” by preservatives (sodium nitrites), I have become sensitive to preservatives and chemicals in processed foods. During the entire year of 2006 I would experience painful reactions in my muscles and joints after eating certain processed food. Out of desperation, I finally went to an allergist in January 2007. I told her that I was allergic to something but didn’t know what. She then asked me for examples. I told her when I ate pizza, within two hours I would “blow up” and hurt all over. I told her when I ate pretzels, I would swell up and hurt all over. I then told her that the previous day I had eaten MSG-free Chinese food. I added that it was hot braised chicken which was coated with flour and then fried. She 161

asked if it was salty, and I told her yes. She then concluded, “It sounds like you are intolerant to salt.” She was right. All of the food I had mentioned was very salty–the pretzels, the preservatives on the pizza meat, and the salty hot braised chicken. She advised me to avoid salty food and MSG. During the office visit, she took my blood pressure. Probably because of the salty hot braised chicken I had eaten the day before, my blood pressure had shot up to 130 over 80, which is very high for me. After the doctor’s appointment, I hurried home and gave my feet and arms an ion cleanse treatment. Within an hour, the pain in my joints and muscles had subsided, and my body felt cleansed and light again. Another miracle–Dale took my blood pressure right after the “cleanse” and it had gone back down to normal–105 over 75!


Chapter 38

He Just Doesn’t Get It! December 2006

“Sad, but it’s true! An old dog can’t learn new tricks.” For the past three years I had been studying and learning about mycoplasma and for the past year (2006) viruses and cancer. Throughout this entire time period, Dale and I argued over the subject of both disease and cancer. I believed mycoplasma was the cause of many of today’s diseases. He didn’t. I believed that all cancer was caused by micro-organisms. He didn’t. Since 2004 I'd been telling people about the miraculous treatment for lupus and how I had been “cured.” Dale, in the meantime, got irritated when I rattled on and on about mycoplasma and my recovery. He finally confronted me one day by telling me I embarrassed him when I did this. So in 2005, I promised to keep my mouth shut about mycoplasma and mild silver protein, but the flame never burned out. In June 2006, wanting to improve my public speaking skills and prepare myself to speak in front of large groups, I joined Grace Church Toastmasters in Maryland Heights, Missouri. When I joined, I kept my past a secret, but by the end of November, I was ready to “let the cat out of the bag.” I was going to speak about my favorite subject–why people are sick today. At the same time, I was “touching up” the chapter, “Its No Acid-ent Why Some People Do Not Get Sick, and that was also going to be the subject and the title of my speech. When I stood in front of the group, my biggest fear was rejection. Nervous, I realized my only credibility was based on my own experience. Would they believe me? In the past, others hadn’t, especially Dale. This would be the test, though, and I only had five to seven minutes to convince them. Fortunately, Dale wasn’t there to hear my speech, but maybe that was a blessing. At the last minute, he had canceled, saying he was too sick to attend. I began my speech by revealing that I once had lupus but I was now in remission. I briefly explained what my research had uncovered and why I believed people were sick today. Then I sprang it on them–the real cause of disease and cancer—micro-organisms! As I 163

was coming to a close, I could tell by the looks on their faces that they believed me! Finally, after three long years, people were listening to me, and at last I felt credible. Better yet, after the meeting, everyone came running up to me, asking how they could learn more! However, my worries were far from over. I was still concerned about Dale. Ever since September when Dave had warned me about Dale’s health, Dale had steadily gotten worse. Still, I never told Dale what Dave had said either, even though I wanted to. Day by day, I could see Dale’s health deteriorating right before my very eyes, but there was nothing I could do. His headaches and nausea had become more intense. He had hive-like boils on his face and chest, and his color was pale, too. I told him how important it was to eat a “balanced” diet, but he wouldn’t listen. He would mock me by saying, “Medical students consider nutrition a ‘catch-up-on-your-sleep’ class.” He wouldn’t give up fast food either, even after watching the movie Supersize Me, and he still ate very little fruit and no vegetables. There was no doubt in my mind that he was on a collision course with cancer. Topping it all off, right before Thanksgiving, we had a 9-1-1 episode. In the middle of the night while I was sound asleep, Dale woke me up. Thinking he was experiencing a heart attack, he was having an anxiety attack. His heart was racing, and he couldn’t breathe. He was also nauseated. He told me to call 9-1-1. The paramedics took him to the hospital around five o’clock in the morning, and I soon followed with his personal belongings and his clothes. At the hospital, the doctors decided he wasn’t having a heart attack after all but ran a cat scan of his stomach instead. The cat scan revealed that his stomach was all inflamed, but the doctor couldn’t pinpoint the exact cause. Dale was then advised to see a gastrointestinal doctor. Dale then went to a specialist and the doctor scheduled a colonoscopy and an upper GI of his stomach. If these tests didn’t reveal the problem, Dale was to get his gall bladder checked out. The tests were to take place in two weeks on December 12. Even before the night of the emergency room visit, Dale had been complaining of pain in his stomach. I could tell he was worried, and deep down inside, I believe he was afraid it might be cancer. He also knew stomach cancer was one of the most painful ways to die. Again,


I didn’t dare tell him what Dave had told me in September, that he was being attacked by the same viruses that had been attacking me. On the evening before his tests, Dale stayed overnight at my house, because he needed a ride to and from the hospital. Wanting to offer him my support, I had volunteered to drive him. Before we went to sleep that night, that’s when our problems began. Dale wanted to get intimate, but I refused, telling him he had to wear protection. Of course, he frowned and asked, “Why?” I didn’t want to tell him the real reason why (that I was afraid he was contagious), so I had to come up with an excuse. I responded with the only explanation I could quickly come up with at the moment, “Because you’re toxic.” Of all the things to say! Dale prided himself in being very “clean” and always practiced good hygiene, even to the point of being a fanatic. Now, I was in trouble. By the look on his face I could tell he didn’t like being called “toxic.” In fact, he was angry. I should have stopped while I was ahead, but I didn’t. Instead, (referring to the ion cleanse machine) I threw more gasoline on the fire by joking, “If you saw all the toxic crud that came out of people, you’d be scared to death to even have sex with yourself!” Well, my humor didn’t get me out of this bad situation either. Now he was getting madder by the second and demanded an explanation, Bristled and ready to fight, he yelled, “Are you telling me I’m dirty?” Trying to stay calm, I answered, “No I’m not. I’ve been cleaning myself out and I just don’t want to get sick again. That’s all.” Well, that’s when the “****” hit the fan and he lost it. Furious, retaliation was now his intent. Launching a counterattack, Dale knew exactly where I was most vulnerable. What he said next would stab me like a knife and it would go deep–right where it would hurt me most–my “core” belief about myself. Looking me straight in the eye and seeming to be dead serious, he emphatically announced, “Linda, you are mentally ill!” Even though I realized he was angry this assertion was the cruelest remark anyone could have said to me at this point in my life–especially Dale. “Was he serious?” By the look on his face, I believed he was, and I now knew that he meant every word he had said. Instead of fighting back, I grew silent, as I asked myself, “Why would he say this to me? Is this what he really thinks–that I’m crazy?” Devastated, I was now having doubts about whether we should even be together any longer. Staring back at him in disbelief, I wondered 165

“How could he have stayed with me these past three years if all along he thought I was crazy?” But Dale didn’t stop there. No! That wasn’t enough. He had to push and twist the knife even deeper and finish me off, “Linda, all your friends think you’re crazy. Your family, your brother and sister even think you’re crazy!” There was no calling for a truce now. The damage was irreversible, and the battle was over. Dale had won. Defeated and without saying a single word, I retreated to the livingroom and sat down in front of my computer. At the same time, I glanced at the kitchen clock. It was ten o’clock and his tests were in twelve hours. “Maybe he’ll cool off in a little while,” I told myself, “and the dust will settle.” But that wasn’t the way it was to be. Exactly ten minutes later, Dale marched out of the bedroom holding his overnight bag and informed me he was leaving. However, before opening the front door, he stopped and turned around and looked up at me from the landing. With bitterness in his voice he sneered, “Now I know how you really feel about me–just when I need you most and I’m sick!” Not waiting for an answer, he turned around, opened the door, walked out, and slammed the door behind him. As he was pulling out of the driveway, I sat at my computer motionless and in a daze, trying to figure out what had (spiritually) just happened. Always trying to do that, I believed there was a purpose behind this. It was as if a tornado had swept through the house. It had happened that fast. “So, this is how it (our relationship) is supposed to end.” Trying to turn something bad into something good, I justified the breakup by saying, “We were never of ‘like’ mind anyway, and it was just never meant to be. He just doesn’t get it. To think, after three years, just like that....POOF!! And it’s over!” Even though he was mad at me, I still would have taken him to the hospital the next morning. In my heart, I still cared about him and wanted to be with him during the tests. I also knew that he was frightened, and he needed my support now more than ever. But he had chosen his own fate, and it was now out of my hands. He would have to face tomorrow all by himself, without me. The next morning Dale did just that. During the tests, instead of being put out, he chose to be awake but sedated. He wanted to watch the monitor and see the tests “live” as they were happening. 166

The first scheduled test was the colonoscopy, which Dale passed with flying colors. However, the next test, the endoscopy (upper GI), didn’t. Right away, the doctor picked up on a problem in Dale’s stomach. Again, Dale, wide awake and watching the monitor, could see exactly what the doctor was seeing, “inflamed” tissue. That’s when Dale got scared. From his own medical background, Dale knew this could be an indication of cancer. Panicking, he asked the doctor if it was cancer, but the doctor wouldn’t answer him. Instead, the doctor was too busy snipping off a piece of the “abnormal” tissue for a biopsy. Now that the tests were over, all Dale could do was wait for the biopsy results which would be available in a few days. Later that same day I called my brother and told him what had happened the night before. I asked him if he would check on Dale to find out how he was doing and how his tests had come out. Later that evening my brother called me back, saying he had just talked to Dale, and Dale was hysterical. Dale started crying as he told my brother, “Dan, I might have cancer. I’m scared, Dan. I don’t want to die!” After my brother’s report on Dale, I decided not to call Dale. If our relationship was supposed to be over, I didn’t want to get it started back up. As far as I was concerned, Dale was history. He wouldn’t listen to me in the past, why would he listen to me now? Like me, he would have to learn everything the hard way. As the next couple of days passed by, Dale did not try to contact me either. Even my family and friends believed we had broken up for good. The only news I would hear about Dale was now through my brother. Within a week of the biopsy, my brother talked to Dale again. Greatly relieved, Dale told my brother the biopsy had come back “negative” for cancer. Then Dale had a gall bladder test, and that test came back okay, too. But Dale told my brother he was still really sick. Complaining of terrible headaches and nausea, Dale’s face and chest were still broken out with hives and his stomach still hurt, too. He couldn’t eat, and he couldn’t sleep. He was miserable. I spent Christmas with my family and on New Year’s Eve, I spent that evening alone for the first time in three years without Dale. Through the grapevine, I heard that Dale was still sick. It was now January 8, and the doctors had told Dale they didn’t know what was


wrong with him. So they told him there was nothing more they could do, and that’s when the phone calls began. Dale began calling around six o’clock that evening. I had caller ID and saw that it was him, so I didn’t answer it. He wouldn’t give up, though, because he kept calling and calling, until finally I picked up the phone and sarcastically said, “What do you want?” Dale’s voice sounded desperate, as he cried, “Linda, help me! I’m sick! I’m dying!” Holding back my emotions, I nonchalantly asked him what was wrong. He moaned, “I’m sick!” I told him he had “cried wolf” before, and then asked him to describe “sick.” Dale complained that he felt nauseated and had terrible headaches. He also felt dizzy when he stood up and felt like he was going to pass out. Trying to sound indifferent, I advised him to call his doctor. He then confessed that the doctors couldn’t find anything wrong with him. Almost in tears, he sobbed, “Linda, I’m afraid to be alone. Please help me! I’ll give you anything!” Pretending to be insulted, I snapped back, “I don’t want your money! You never listened to me before, why would you listen to me now?” Now, he became really desperate and began pleading, “Linda, please! I’m BEGGING you! I’ll do anything you say. You’re the only one who can help me!” All of a sudden, an eerie feeling came over me as if I were having a “deja vu.” Then goose bumps appeared on my arms as I was having a flashback. It was September and I was talking on the phone with Dave and his chilling words were now coming back to haunt me, “Don’t worry, by February he’ll be begging you to help him!” “Oh my God! What Dave said has come true!” Before I could give Dale an answer, a second call was coming through, and I told Dale I had to put him on hold to answer it. It was Donna. I told her I couldn’t talk and that I would call her right back. After getting back with Dale, I told him that I would have to think about it, and I would call him back later that night with my answer. When I hung up the phone, I asked myself, “What am I going to do now?” After three years of fighting, it was over, but now I felt guilty. He needed me, and he had always been there for me when I needed him. I wanted to help him, but I didn’t want to get back together. At this time, I decided I needed advice, but who could I ask? Just then, I thought of Donna. She was smart. She would know what to do. 168

(Note: Donna and I had become good friends and I had already told her the story about Dave, including the prediction about Dale begging me to help him.) As soon as Donna answered the phone, I said, “Donna, you won’t believe what happened! What Dave told me about Dale has come true!” As Donna and I talked it over, I told Donna that I would like to help him, but I didn’t want to ger back together. I asked her what she would do. Making a good point, she said, “Linda, what if you refuse to help him, and someday you need help and someone refuses to help you?” I agreed that I could create “bad” karma over this and I definitely didn’t want that. As I thought it over, I told Donna that Dave never did say what the outcome would be. I then told her, “I guess God is leaving that up to me.” When I hung up the phone, I immediately called Dale back and told him, “I’ve decided to help you.”



Chapter 39

The Night Visitor January 2007

“Imaginary things are harder to bear than actual ones.” – Robert Louis Stevenson I never realized my book would have a climax–that Dale would get sick and it would be up to me to save him. But one good turn deserves another. Just like two years before when he saved my life (by taking me down to Birmingham to get the mild silver protein treatments), now it was my turn to save his. Of course, Dale and I will never be able to prove that it was viruses attacking his stomach, but maybe it’s for the best. If he had been diagnosed with cancer, he would have had to undergo chemotherapy, and who knows how this story would have ended. When I agreed to help Dale, I told him to come over the next day (Tuesday) and bring extra clothes. I told him he would be staying with me for at least one month so I could take care of him. I also informed him that there were conditions–he had to do everything I asked him to do. He agreed. I told him I would fix his food and he was going to eat a healthy diet, including fruits and vegetables. Overall, I think he was just relieved that he wasn’t going to be alone anymore. I told him we would use the Rife machine to kill the viruses. Then we would use the ion cleanse machine to pull the toxins out of his body. Even though he wasn’t enthusiastic about using the ion cleanse machine, he agreed to do it. So, on Tuesday, January 9, Dale moved in to stay for one month. I had not seen him since the middle of December, and he looked terrible. His face was puffy, and he had a painful looking strep infection on his left eyelid. He still had the hivelike boils and welts on his face and chest. I believed him when he said he felt miserable and was sick. He said that he was dizzy and also had a headache. He complained that he was nauseated and his stomach hurt, too. Dale said he wanted to rest and didn’t want to start any treatments until the next day. I said, “Sure, whatever you say. We’ll start tomorrow.”


Around ten o’clock that night we went to bed, and for some reason in the middle of the night, I woke up. Not being able to fall back to sleep, I looked at the clock and noticed that it was three. I then glanced over at Dale and saw that he was peacefully sleeping on his back. I didn’t want to wake him, so I kept perfectly still, quietly laying there thinking about my book. Then, without warning, Dale suddenly “jerked” and started talking in his sleep. Then, he began shouting, “Hey! Hey! Hey!” as if someone was assaulting him and Dale was warning the attacker. Dale then abruptly stopped. But no sooner had he stopped, then he started right back up again and screamed even louder this time, “Hey! Hey! Hey!” While this was going on, I just lay there watching him. I was afraid to touch him or wake him up, fearing he would flail out at me. So I just watched. Just as it all had started, it ended the same way when Dale woke up with a sudden “jerk.” He then rolled over and with eyes wide open stared at me. I could tell by the look on his face that he was still quite shaken by whatever had just happened. Slightly pale, it appeared as if he had just seen a ghost. Thinking the dream was still fresh in his mind, I asked him if he had just had a nightmare. Still appearing to be shaken, he answered, “Yes,” Then, suddenly snapping out of his trance, he began scolding me by saying, “How come you didn’t wake me up? I saw that you were awake!” Surprised, I was now wondering how he knew I was awake when supposedly he was sound asleep. So I asked, “If you were asleep, how did you know I was awake?” He couldn’t come up with an explanation, but he said he just somehow knew. Now I was really curious, so I asked him to tell me about his dream. Dale said he was sleeping (in the dream) and was suddenly woke up by a loud “clunk-like” noise. The noise came from the closed bedroom door where a man had just stepped through it and entered the room. The man then walked over to his (Dale’s) side of the bed and stood there perfectly still, looking down at both of us. Out of curiosity, I interrupted, “What did the man look like?” Dale then described the man as being illuminated all in white and wearing a white hooded Arab-type robe with a belt. “Could you see his face?” I asked, and Dale shook his head no and said he couldn’t. But Dale swore that it was a man with a hood over his head. Wanting to hear more, I said, “Tell me what happened next.” 172

Dale confessed that he was scared to death and couldn’t move. He had tried to wake up but couldn’t. Then, without warning, the man reached down and started poking him. Interrupting him again, I asked, “Is that why you were screaming?” and Dale said, “Yes.” Continuing the story, Dale went on to say that every time the man poked him, he (Dale) would start screaming, and then the man would back off into the corner of the room. But, no sooner had Dale stopped screaming, than the man immediately came back over to the side of the bed and started poking him again. Now spellbound. I said, “Keep going. What happened next?” Dale ended the dream by admitting that he was too terrified to even move but somehow he was able to wake up. Again, I believed there was a purpose behind all of this, and I had a hunch. So I asked, “Show me where the man was poking you.” Dale then placed his fingers on the right side of his body right below his rib cage. “Isn’t that where your stomach is?” I asked. “Isn’t that where you are experiencing the pain?” Hesitating, as if thinking, Dale answered, “Yes.” I then asked, “Do you think this man was trying to tell you where to put the Rife machine?” By now, Dale wasn’t answering me. He was now deep in thought, and by the look on his face, Dale was putting two and two together just as I had done. Maybe he was finally realizing that it might not have been a dream after all! AUTHOR’S NOTE: Darn it! Dale has all the fun. Here I was laying there, wide awake during the entire episode, and I didn’t even get one glimpse of “The Night Visitor!”



Chapter 40

Getting Back into the Swing of Things February 2007

If someone walked up to me today and said, “Linda, tomorrow you are going to the moon and you can only take two things with you.” The first thing I’d take along would be my ion cleanse machine and the other would be a very long extension cord. The next morning we started the treatment with the Rife machine. We first looked in the Rife manual for the frequencies for stomach cancer. We were in luck. There was a programmed sequence of frequencies for stomach cancer–five in all. I was still inexperienced with where to “place” the Rife machine plates, so I was grateful that the “Night Visitor” had shown us where to put the plates. We put one plate on the front of his stomach below his ribs and the other plate directly behind his stomach on his back. Placing the plates in this position meant the current would run directly through his stomach. Then Dale sat on the couch and received his first treatment. Miraculously, after the treatment was over, Dale, completely amazed, exclaimed, “ The pain is gone!” I told Dale that we couldn’t stop the treatments now even if the pain had stopped. We had to keep doing them for at least one more month to make sure the viruses in his stomach were dead. He agreed, and I think this is when he started to believe that the Rife machine really worked. Right after the Rife machine treatment, he used the ion cleanse machine. When we did his arms, just like magic his headache and nausea disappeared. For the first time in three years, he did not have a headache. As the days passed by, I could see that Dale was getting better. Dale used the Rife machine and the ion cleanse continuously through February. He particularly liked the Rife machine’s “frequency 103" which seemed to work best for him. He claimed it calmed his nerves. Finally, Dale no longer suffered from headaches and nausea. He now was smiling more often, too. The pain in his stomach had gone away, too. For myself, I think the ion cleanse machine had worked


miracles for me, too. It “pulled” the toxins out of my tissues, and my joints and muscles were now almost “pain-free.” Then another miracle happened. Dale and I had been together since the summer of 2003, and for the first time, he let down his guard and opened his heart up to me. One night, we had a long talk. He told me that all these years he had worn a mask. He wasn’t the rough, tough confident man I thought he was. He confessed that it was just a front. In reality, he said he had low self esteem. As I sat there listening, I could hardly believe my ears. Here was a man who could run a business. He could fire a person on the drop of a hat. He had achieved so much–success and wealth, but inside he was a soft marshmallow. Even though he confessed this to me, I admired and adored him for it. I was finally meeting the “real” Dale. He was taking off the armor. He was opening up and revealing his true inner self and his true feelings. It was wonderful! I told Dale that I wanted to be with someone who wanted to help others, and Dale said he wanted to help people, too. “Would you even go to Africa with me?” I asked. “Yes,” he said, “I wanna be with you. I love you, Boo.” Putting my arms around his neck, I looked into his eyes and said, “I love you, too, Poo.”


INTERMISSION But don’t stop now!

The show’s not over yet! 177


Chapter 41

Once Again the Sleeping Tiger Awakens April 2007

It’s those little “blessings in disguise” that keep me moving forward. By now it was April and I was just finishing the final edit. Since February, I had been working long hours, sometimes eight to ten hours a day on the computer. Being a perfectionist, I kept editing the chapters again and again, going over the story, tweaking and condensing it, trying to make it “flow” and keep it interesting. The reward was great, but I paid dearly for it. From sitting at the computer for long periods of time, my ankles and knees swelled up. Worse yet, trying to get up from the computer was painful, because my joints and muscles had stiffened. I was also tired, both mentally and physically, but that didn’t stop me. In the background Dale kept nagging me to let up, but stubbornly I refused to listen. “People are sick,” I said, “and need to find out about the treatment.” So time was now my enemy, and I was determined to finish the book ASAP. Finally, by mid-April, the final edit was done. Now the book (through chapter 40) was ready to go to press. To publish a sample book, I had decided to POD (print on demand) and self-publish it on But now I had more work cut out for me. I had to do everything myself, including typesetting the book and designing a book cover, too. But where there is a will, there is a way. Overall, when the book was finally self-published, it appeared to be professionally done. Now that I had self-published a sample book, I could finally take a breather. Coincidentally, Dale and I had made plans to take a twoweek vacation to Sedona, Arizona beginning on June 1, and it was just in the nick of time. I was a physical wreck and exhausted, too. Unfortunately, there was still a dark cloud hanging over my head. I still had not found an agent or a publisher. Not only was I exhausted, now I began to worry. Since I had invested so heavily in this project over the past years, I was now deep in debt. If something didn’t “manifest” soon, I would have no choice but to “abandon ship” and sell my house to pay off my debts. Now more than ever the tension was 179

mounting. Somehow, I had gotten it into my thick head that everything depended on my finding an agent to get published. But I didn’t know how, when or where I was going to find one. So instead of being calm and relaxed, I became even more stressed out, worrying about that next step–finding an agent. Adding more fuel to the fire, it was now the last week in April, and I had another face-off scheduled with my doctor. Unfortunately, since the last visit, my “sed” rate was still high, and I was still frightened he would insist that I take medication. Although my doctor appointment went well, my joints were still stiff and swollen; but overall I felt pretty good–just worn out. Afterwards, I went to the lab for the tests, then drove straight home, feeling confident that this ordeal was now water under the bridge and my health problems were nothing to worry about. Wrong! Obviously, I had no premonition of what was waiting for me when I got home. Just what I needed–more stress, for in my mailbox was a letter from my private disability company informing me that I HAD to get recertified to keep receiving disability benefits. What bad timing, because I had just been to the doctor that very day. Now, the thought of getting re-certified terrified me. Negative thoughts began racing through my head. “What if my doctor wouldn’t certify me disabled? What if I lost my disability? How would I support myself? Worse yet, what would become of my book?” After losing two night’s sleep over it, I finally got the courage to take the paperwork in to my doctor’s office. When dropping it off, I realized my financial situation was now in his hands, but all I could do at this point was wait for the filled out forms to be returned in the mail. Fortunately, I didn’t have to wait long, for exactly two days later I received the paperwork back in the mail. Holding my breath and saying a quick prayer, I opened the envelope. As I looked over the paperwork, my eyes opened wide. Surprise! My doctor had recertified me! Then another even bigger surprise came in the mail the very next day-the blood test results from my doctor appointment. Now, it became crystal clear why my doctor had re-certified me. The tests revealed that my lupus had returned! (See Exhibit 11, Medical Records.) Puzzled, I asked myself, “How could my lupus have returned? How could this have happened?” This made no sense, whatsoever, because I had received nineteen mild silver protein 180

treatments over a period of one year! The mycoplasma had literally been eradicated from my body! But, for whatever reason, my lupus had slightly returned, which actually proved to be a blessing in disguise! This flare-up, along with another high “sed” rate, had qualified me for disability. Again, I was amazed at how something bad had turned into something good. Satisfied that I was“safe” for the time being, I realized that the only obstacle in my way now was me. Still impatient, I asked God, “How long will I have to wait before I find an agent?” But sometimes the Universe does respond quickly, for unbeknownst to me, an opportunity was just about to be dropped right into my lap(top). On May 1, I opened an e-mail from Steve Harrison who was announcing another Quantum Leap Program which was to kick-off with a seminar in Los Angeles in mid-June. This definitely was interesting news, but what really caught my attention was his “hook.” At the seminar, four of the top literary agents in the country were going to be present, interviewing and screening potential clients! I was absolutely sure that this was the opportunity I had been waiting for–to get an agent! Better yet, I was excited when I learned that Brad Stuart was one of the agents. (In my opinion, he was the most famous and number one literary agent in the country.) Competing for a spot in the Quantum Leap Program this time was easy, because this time I was prepared. Sure enough, after submitting a great application, it was a “done deal.” I was accepted into the program. What a coincidence that Dale and I were going to be in Arizona in mid-June anyway! We were only going to be a five-hour drive from Los Angeles. Yet there was still one problem I had to deal with–my lupus had returned. The “sleeping tiger” had “awakened” once again. When I told Dale of my concern about returning to Sedona, I reminded him that Sedona was 4,500 feet above sea level. I asked, “What if I get altitude sickness again?” Then Dale came up with a brilliant idea. He suggested we drive down to Alabama and get a MSP treatment to “knock out” the mycoplasma. Of course, I said, “Yes!” So on May 22, one week before we were to leave for Sedona and Los Angeles, we packed our bags, got in the car, and headed south one more time to visit Dr. Smith for another mild silver protein treatment.



Chapter 42

Putting Out the Last Fire May 2007

I never thought I would ever have to say the following words: “The third time’s a charm!” We had already contacted Dr. Smith telling him that we were coming down and that my lupus had returned. When we arrived at his office, I was taken back to the treatment room, and an IV of mild silver protein was administered. During the treatment, I asked Dr. Smith if he would run another QX diagnostic on me after the treatment. I was curious. I wanted to know what was going on in my body. Within two hours, the treatment was over, and I was ready for my second session with the QX. (As a reminder, my first QX diagnostic in February 2006 had revealed the following: (1) food poisoning, (2) heavy metal poisoning, (3) viruses in my liver, (4) RA and (5) a vitamin deficiency.) The second session took around 60 minutes, and this time the findings were quite different from the first. There were no viruses detected nor were there any traces of heavy metal or food poisoning. My RA was at a minimum, too! Of course, this was great news, but then something very peculiar happened. While going over the results with me, Dr. Smith abruptly stopped. Then, without warning, he blurted out in an almost accusing, yet half-joking southern drawl, “Girrrl......WHAT have you been eating?” Not understanding what he was getting at, I defensively replied, “I try to eat healthy.” Not satisfied with my answer, he jumped to his own conclusion by stating, “You must be eating too many greens!” Confused, I looked over at him and shook my head, meaning no. Now he appeared to be confused and began to question the QX’s authenticity when he declared, “The QX is showing your body tissue pH is 8.6!” Finally, I understood why he was so alarmed, but I wasn’t. On the contrary, I was ecstatic! FACT: When the body tissue’s pH is 8.6, organisms DIE! Amazingly, the QX confirmed that my ion cleanse machine was working. My body tissue pH was now alkaline and my cells were finally “balanced!”


In the car on the way home later that afternoon, I had a mild reaction (Herxheimer effect) to the mild silver protein. I experienced chills and fever, but then it was over. Overall, the trip was a complete success–the MSP had “kicked butt” and the mycoplasma was dead. Even better news was awaiting me when I got home. Dave in New York had e-mailed me that same afternoon asking if he could sell my book in his store. He had read it and loved it! Even better yet, he gave me the following health update in his e-mail. He wrote: “Your spine needs to be checked. It is off at C-3, L-3, L-4, T8 and T-4 besides less dominant areas. The orientation of the spine is putting too much pressure on the lymphatics which can re-invite disease.” Another confirmation! There was no mention of micro-organisms attacking me. At last I was “disease-free,” and I was now ready to go west and seek fame and fortune!


Chapter 43

Go West and Seek Fame and Fortune! The Earth Mother Healing Center Sedona, Arizona June 2007

“You will soon be crossing desert sands for a fun vacation” – a fortune cookie I opened in mid-May 2007 It was such a great feeling to be back in Sedona, and this time I didn’t get sick from the high altitude as I had in December 2001. I was also looking forward to getting together with Mary-Margareht for another session/reading. We had not seen each other in over five years. Unfortunately, right before we left for Arizona, I tried calling her, but her number had been disconnected which concerned me. Since I had last seen her, the Earth, Mother, Father Foundation had lost their lease on their building and had to pull up stakes and move to Cottonwood which was 15 miles west of Sedona. Now, all I had was an address. So on Saturday, the day after we arrived, we drove over to Cottonwood to find Mary-Margareht. To us, it was like looking for a needle in a haystack, because Cottonwood is no small town. But luck was on our side! By chance, we stopped for lunch at the Sizzler in Cottonwood. While eating, I asked our waitress if she was familiar with Cottonwood and told her I needed directions. She then asked me to wait and went into the kitchen. Immediately, out popped a young woman with a friendly smile. She asked if she could help me, and I asked her if she knew Mary-Margareht Rose. Instantly, her face lit up. Smiling, she said, “Mary-Margareht’s granddaughter and I know each other well!” She then gave me directions to the address. After lunch, we drove over to the address and it turned out to be Mary-Margareht’s daughter’s house. We were told Mary-Margareht had moved, and her daughter gave me her new phone number. Finally, I was going to “connect” with Mary-Margareht. When I called Mary-Margareht, we exchanged greetings, and she told me a lot had happened since we had last seen each other. She then invited us to attend “The Gathering” the next day (Sunday) at the Sedona Community Center, and I told her we’d see her there. 185

Having not been to “The Gathering” for at least five years, there were familiar faces and there were many new faces. The reunion was wonderful, and just like in the past, Mary-Margareht announced at the end of the service that she and Cynthia would be giving angel messages to each person there. Excited, I knew this would be Dale’s first experience receiving a message from his angels. Then it just so happened that Cynthia was the one who gave Dale and me our individual messages. Dale was first, at which time Cynthia stood in front of Dale and took his hands in hers and asked his permission to give him a message. He agreed, and she said, “Look back on what has happened in your life, and ask yourself what can I learn from it?” Then she finished by adding, “You will soon be going through a change in your core beliefs.” Now it was my turn. (Note: Cynthia and I had never met, and it was going to be interesting to hear what she had to say.) First, Cynthia took my hands in hers, then closed her eyes and became silent. After a few seconds, she opened her eyes and looked into mine, smiling as she said, “They (meaning my angels) are telling me that you are a messenger! Information comes down to you like a swirling vortex through your crown chakra. You also have access to the ancient wisdom.” Afterwards, Mary-Margareht and I were able to talk privately and we set up an appointment for Wednesday at twelve noon at her new center. But before leaving, I gave her a copy of my book, asking her for some feedback. Wednesday could not have come any sooner. After five long years of making my own decisions and not seeking any advice, I was finally going to hear what they (spirit) had to say about my current situation. Mary-Margareht began with her own personal comments about my book. She told me she had read part of it and liked what she had read, except she thought the book’s subtitle would scare people. (Note: Originally the subtitle read, “Death will walk the Earth and you will tell people where to go to be safe.”) She then added that she had tried to think of another subtitle, but couldn’t come up with one. She then suggested that she channel Mother Mary and ask Mother Mary for an idea. I wholeheartedly agreed and Mary-Margaret paused for a few seconds as if centering herself. Then she began channeling. The following is what Mother Mary said: “First, we wish to thank you for 186

working so hard and staying so focused. Millions of books will be sold, and you will help many people.” Then Mary-Margareht paused and added, “Mother Mary is saying ‘hope for the future’ would be a nice subtitle.” I agreed. I liked Mother Mary’s suggestion and thanked her. After the reading was over, Mary-Margareht and I went to lunch. We had so much to catch up on. While eating, I asked her if she had ever finished channeling the true story of the inner circle of Jesus, and she said that she had. She added that it was now on their website for people to read. This was definitely exciting news. Then the mood changed, as I became more serious. With sadness in my heart, I confided, “Mary-Margareht, sometimes I feel that I know too much–what is really going on in the world.” I told her that it had almost become too unbearable, and I was very sad. I told her that I had prayed many times asking God to stop all the madness, but I was never given an answer. Mary-Margareht then said that she, too, had prayed about it many times and WAS given an answer. She told me that before it got totally out of hand, there would be divine intervention–that God would step in. She then explained what she was told would happen. Of all the messages I received that week in Sedona, this was the most uplifting. By the time Dale and I left Sedona for Los Angeles, I was no longer afraid for mankind and no longer fearful of the future. With new hope in my heart and my faith in God renewed, I was now ready to take the next step, “Father, roll out the red carpet for Hollywood here I come!” AUTHOR’S NOTE: What, when and how God will intervene is not my story to tell. If you would like to learn more, please visit my website, and click on The Earth Mother Healing Center’s link.



Chapter 44

My Quantum Leap Hollywood, California June 2007

“All things comes to those who are willing to show up and make it happen” – an old proverb I rewrote It was now June 12, and Dale and I were on Universal Hollywood Boulevard at the Sheraton Hotel ready to attend Steve Harrison’s Quantum Leap seminar. Everything I had been dreaming of and working so hard for was finally becoming my reality. It was so exciting to be part of this three-day seminar because everyone there was just like me. Each one of us was making a commitment and taking that big step to fulfilling a dream. In all, there were a total of 52 attendees (members) in this Quantum Leap Program. The first day was the highlight of the seminar for me. This was the day the four literary agents were to interview each one of us. (Unfortunately, only three were present. One was a “no-show.”) Again, they were there looking for prospective clients/authors to represent, and just as Steve had promised, Brad Stuart, the number one literary agent in the country, was there. Each one of us had only three minutes (and believe me, we were timed) to individually “pitch” each agent. First, we were all led into a banquet room where three separate lines were being formed–one to each agent. Since Brad’s line was the most popular and the longest, I decided to get in another line first. As I got closer and closer to it being my turn, I tried not to get nervous, as I told myself, “This will be good practice. You don’t want this agent anyway.” Sure enough, when it was finally my turn, the agent turned me down flat. He just wasn’t interested. When I walked away from the interview, I was a little hurt by his rejection, but I chuckled to myself saying, “Maybe someday he’ll be kicking himself for turning me down.” Then, I got into Brad Stuart’s line. As it got closer and closer to it being my turn, I concentrated, silently practicing my pitch. I knew that this was going to be a tough three-minute “sell,” because my story 189

was so unbelievable. Deep in concentration and not paying much attention to what was going on around me, the minutes quickly passed by. Suddenly I “woke up” and saw there was only one person in front of me. Now feeling really nervous, I realized everything I had gone through and worked so hard for was now riding on the next three minutes. Feeling the pressure, I thought to myself, “Would Brad believe my story? Would I be credible?” Finally, the person keeping time signaled to me that it was now my turn. When I had attended college in the 1980's, I had become a “pro” at taking exams under pressure. In fact, I “aced” almost every test I took. My secret? (1) Stay calm and always be prepared and (2) take a deep breath and let it out slowly right before beginning the test. So, before taking that first big step towards Brad, I took a deep breath and let it slowly out and then walked straight up to him. Standing in front of him, a feeling of confidence suddenly came over me. Making good eye contact, I reached out and shook his hand and handed him my business card. I must admit that the next three minutes were a blur, but somehow I must have made a good impression, because at the end of the interview, Brad handed ME his business card and told me to send him all my material. As I walked away in a daze, it suddenly dawned on me that what I had unwittingly asked the Universe for (an agent) had manifested. Brad Stuart was going to be my agent, and I was going to be published! Author’s Note: As I walked away, little did I know how wrong I would be. Once again I had mistakenly jumped to conclusions.


Chapter 45

Where’s My Knight in Shining Armor? July/August 2007

If I had paid myself by the hour, I’d be a millionaire by now. As soon as we returned home, I immediately sat down and finished the chapter entitled My Quantum Leap. Just as I had promised Brad, by mid-July I mailed him a finished book along with my book proposal. Now, all I had to do was wait for his response. Exactly one week later, I called his office and talked to Lucy, his assistant. She acknowledged receiving the book but also admitted that Brad was very busy. She then informed me that he would get back with me as soon as he could. Now another month had gone by and I still had not heard from him. Impatient, I again picked up the phone and called his office. This time, Lucy told me Brad was in Alaska attending a conference. Trying to sound professional and polite, I explained to her that I needed an answer–yes or no. “If he doesn’t want to represent me,” I told her, “I need to move on.” She was very understanding as she told me she would be talking to him the next morning when he called in to the office. She assured me that she would call me as soon as she talked to him. Well, just as Lucy promised, she did call the next morning. However, instead of presenting me with good news, she apologized, saying that Brad said he had too much on his plate and couldn’t take on any new clients. Devastated, I tried to think of another solution. Just then an idea came to me. I quickly walked over to the stack of books and binders that Steve Harrison had handed out at the Quantum Leap seminar. Rummaging through the stack, I quickly found what I was looking for. Opening up the binder, I turned to the page that listed the literary agents. Just as I thought–there in the listing was the agent who was the “no-show.” In his “bio,” he had stated that he was Kevin Trudeau’s agent! “This agent has to be the one,” I thought to myself. “If he represented Kevin Trudeau, surely he would jump at the chance to represent me.” 191

So immediately I sat down at my computer and typed up a letter, stating that I was a member of the Quantum Leap Program. “Surely, mentioning this,” I told myself, “will open the door for me.” After putting together the letter, the book, the book proposal, and several other informational documents, I put them all in an envelope, sealed it, and mailed it priority mail to the agent’s office in California. Now I could take a much needed rest, but I still had one more hoop to jump through. Coincidentally, that same week I had another doctor’s appointment, and the high “sed” rate was still a major concern. Still refusing to be reasonable, I had decided not to take drugs for this. So obviously, I was not looking forward to this visit. Although I felt confident my lupus was now gone (in remission) since the last mild silver protein treatment in May, was my “sed” rate down, too? (Note: In May the blood tests had revealed that my “sed” rate was still too high–61, which was not acceptable.) But, again, that was before the MSP treatment and more ion cleanse treatments. Telling my doctor that I had received another mild silver protein treatment in May, I told him I felt pretty good. After my doctor made a note of this, the office visit ended with my blood being drawn. Now, all I could do was wait for the blood test results to arrive in the mail. It was also one week before Labor Day. Too antsy to wait any longer, I called the California agent’s office that same afternoon, right after I got home from my doctor’s appointment. Impatient, I waned an answer now. Luckily, a very nice woman answered the phone. However, she had disappointing news. Everyone in the office was on vacation except for her, and she was only the bookkeeper. She apologized, saying she couldn’t help me. She did check the mail, however, and confirmed that my package had arrived. She probably sensed my urgency and told me to call the agent’s assistant Tuesday. Before hanging up the phone, I thanked her and felt confident that everything was finally going my way. I just had to be more patient. Well, obviously patience is not one of my virtues, because Tuesday I called the agent’s office again. This time I spoke to his assistant, and she told me the agent would be out of the office until two week’s after Labor Day! She did reassure me, though, that he would look over my material and get back with me by the end of September.


Well, with that, all I could do was say, “Thank you,” and again play the waiting game. However, this time, I was SURE he was going to be my hero–my knight in shining armor.



Chapter 46

Never Give Up! September 2007

“You will find your solution where you least expect it” – a fortune cookie I opened the last week in August. Finally, September was almost over, which meant the agent had been back from vacation for over a week. I was so nervous, that every time the phone rang, I got butterflies in my stomach. In the meantime, I had received some great news! My blood test results (Exhibit 12, Medical Records) had arrived in the mail. They were even better than I had expected. In fact, they were fantastic. My lupus was right on the borderline of “negative” and even better than that, my “sed” rate was now 15, which was in the normal range. Also, my rheumatoid factor was 10, which was normal. I was so excited by the news, that I immediately made copies of the blood test results and mailed them to the agent in California to prove that I was healthy. Then that same day, my hopes were shattered, for in the afternoon mail appeared a thick padded envelope from the agent’s office. Judging by its appearance, it didn’t look good. In fact, it appeared as if they had returned all of my material. Just as I thought, for when I opened the package, I was right. The return cover letter read like a standard form letter: “Thank you for your recent submission. We have had the opportunity to review the materials you sent us regarding your book, and unfortunately, after careful consideration, we do not feel our agency could successfully market your project. We wish you every success in placing your work.” At that moment, I was ready to just “throw in the towel.” Until now, I had been optimistic and pumped up. But this last rejection was almost as bas as being sick. I had been through so much and worked so hard–for what? Only to fail?


Upset, I went into my bedroom, flopped down on my bed, and just lay there staring up at the ceiling. Now I was getting angry. Feeling as if I had done everything humanly possible, I believed He (God) had let me down and had failed me. Frustrated and mad, in an angry voice I cried out (at God), “What do you want me to do? Tell me what you want me to do! I’ve done everything I can! I give up!! It’s up to YOU now!!!” But I got no answer–only goose bumps.


Chapter 47

My Father Always Knows Best October 2007

“An autobiography is only to be trusted when it reveals something disgraceful. A man who gives a good account of himself is probably lying since any life when viewed from the inside is simply a series of defeats.” – George Orwell Now, it seemed as if the only option I had left was to self-publish. Unfortunately, I knew very little about self-publishing. So here I was again, not knowing which way to turn. To tell you the truth, I was at the end of my rope, but deep down inside, I really didn’t want to give up–not for awhile at least. So I decided to give God one more chance. Now I had time to kill. Whenever I have spare time, I love to surf the Internet and that’s just what I did. I especially like to read about the Illuminati and what’s really going on in the world. So one night I was googling “Illuminati,” and by chance came upon an interview that was done in the year 2000 with a Joseph L. Prince (anagram). I became fascinated by this man who had chronicled the real history of the Illuminati and for that matter the real history of the world. His book had been published (now out of print), and I told myself, “If he found a publisher, so can I.” Still determined not to self-publish, I googled his publisher’s name and came up with one page of results. “It figures,” I said to myself as I scanned the page. The results were all self-publishing websites, and I had been down that road before. “Oh, what the heck,” I said to myself, “I’ll look anyway.” I then skipped down a few links and randomly clicked on one entitled Just for the heck of it, because it was free, I filled out an application to self-publish. Then I clicked on the button and submitted it. Supposedly, a customer service rep would be contacting me. “This was different,” I thought to myself, “Most self-publishing sites will not even bother to communicate with anyone over the phone.” Now curious, I began scrolling down the rest of the home page and came upon a toll-free number. “Wow! This IS really something!” Then I scrolled down to the bottom of the page where it stated: “Booksurge 197

Publishing is a subsidiary of!” “Oh my gosh!” I thought to myself, “Maybe this is the opportunity I’ve been looking for. Maybe I’m supposed to self-publish on!” I immediately picked up the phone and called their toll-free number. I was only on hold a few seconds before I was connected to a “live” customer service rep, and to my surprise she was American! You can only imagine how good that felt to talk to a “live” person who was also in America and not in a third-world country. She then looked up my application and verified the information I had submitted. She informed me that I had been assigned to David G, but unfortunately, David was in a meeting. She politely asked if he could call me back the next morning, and I wholeheartedly said, “Yes, as soon as possible.” Sure enough, just as the customer service rep had promised, David called me at eight o’clock the next morning, and the following is a condensed script of our conversation: Linda: Can you tell me about royalties? David: You get 25 percent of the list price if it is sold on If it is sold in the stores you get 10 percent of the list price . Also, if you have an Amazon,com link on your website, you get a commission if that person buys anything on through your link. Linda: Do I get to keep ownership of my book? David: Yes, you do. Linda: Are there any setup charges? David: Yes, a one-time fee of $99 which includes an ISBN number. Linda: This is too hard to believe. Can book stores order and sell my book? David: Yes. Linda: You mean, if someone walks into Borders, they could order my book? David: Yes, and you would get ten percent of the list price. Linda: This is too good to be true! Where are you calling from? David: South Carolina. (At this time, David “walked” me through the tutorials on their web site. I was amazed that he could take the time to do this. He also made it clear to me that if I had any questions or problems, to just call him!)


David: I’m going to e-mail you your password and after that you can log onto the website yourself and fill out the financial paperwork and fax them in. Do you have any other questions? Linda: No. I’m just so excited about being part of Booksurge. I never imagined it could be this easy to self-publish. This is better than being published by a big publishing house. And you know what adds icing to the cake? David: No. What? Linda: That believes in America and supports Americans’ jobs, Thank you so much, David! You have made me so very happy! David: You’re welcome. It’s going to be a pleasure doing business with you, Linda. Just call me if you have any more questions. Goodbye. Linda: Bye. AUTHOR’S NOTE: Once again God came through and caught me completely by surprise, AND the solution did appear where I least expected it. Thinking back, my Father ALWAYS knows best. Thank you Father, for I am truly grateful.




Chapter 48

Taming the Savage Beast PLEASE NOTE: As mentioned in the front of my book, please check with a qualified health practitioner before beginning a program to regain or attain perfect health. Please do not use the following recommendations or suggestions, unless you are willing to assume the risk and take full responsibility for any adverse effects or outcome resulting from taking any of the products mentioned in this chapter. Based on my own experience I realize that I will never be 100 percent free of mycoplasma or viruses, BUT I now know how to never get seriously ill again. I can accomplish this by (1) eating a balanced diet, (2) avoiding highly processed foods and sugar, (3) not sharing body fluids with an infected person, (4) keeping my stress level low, (5) getting plenty of exercise (oxygen) and sleep, (6) regularly using my ion cleanse machine, and finally (7) taking vitamins and supplements to keep my immune system strong. The following are a few supplements and products I have been using and highly recommend: IMMUNE SYSTEM: Lapacho (pau d’Arco) tincture SOURCE: Cheryl’s Herbs, PURPOSE: Anti-fungal, anti-cancer and anti-viral DOSAGE: Shake bottle well, take one eye dropper full, three times a day for first three months, then (using your own judgment) cut back on dosage to one or two times per day. (Lapacho is slow to “kick in” and may take several months before noticing results. COST: ~$20/month RESULTS FOR ME: After taking Lapacho for three months, my toenail fungus finally disappeared. Also, I noticed I did not catch colds or get full-blown flu’s even though I was exposed to them. True story: My son caught the “cruise ship virus.” He was sick in bed for three days. I caught it and was sick only eight hours. Then, Dale caught it and was sick for three weeks. NOTE: I trust Cheryl’s herbs because she has very good integrity and manufactures her own products under her own brand. (If the 201

inner bark of the pau d’Arco tree is not used, Lapacho is ineffective.) I do not recommend taking Lapacho in pill form because of quality. IMMUNE SYSTEM: Bovine colostrum SOURCE: Health food store or the Internet (go to my website for link) PURPOSE: Protects against disease (builds immune system) DOSAGE: Follow instructions on bottle COST: ~$30/bottle (30 pills/bottle) NOTE: I have read many testimonials from people who have been “cured” of disease by taking colostrum (multiple sclerosis, for example). I buy colostrum from an Internet company which gets its colostrum from “happy” dairy cattle, meaning they are treated humanely and are pasture fed (organic), not factory raised. The colostrum I use is milk-free. OVERALL GOOD HEALTH: eating sprouts SOURCE: PURPOSE: Sprouts are the only food source that can “rejuvenate” cells COST: Varies, depending on quantity and type FACT: Ancient people survived long cold winters (food shortage) by eating sprouts (seeds can be stored and sprouted later). NOTE: I trust and highly recommend the above company, because they have good integrity and sell only “organic” products, including vegetable garden seeds. IMMUNE SYSTEM: Cat’s Claw tincture SOURCE: Cheryl’s Herbs, COST: ~$20/month PURPOSE: Anti-fungal NOTE: I have read several testimonials where Cat’s Claw was effective against mycoplasma infections, but if I had to choose, I would pick Lapacho over Cat’s Claw. OVERALL GOOD HEALTH: Ion cleanse machine SOURCE: Please visit my website for the link and/or phone number 202

PURPOSE: Chelates heavy metals and toxins and restores cell “balance” FACT: This machine works miracles. Please read the chapter entitled “The Magic Bullet” for the machine’s benefits. In my opinion, this machine is the secret to longevity. Please visit my website for the most up-to-date information and website links for health-related products and topics.



Chapter 49

Conclusion: I Believe in Angels “Gratitude is the best attitude” By now, I have learned that even when I put a request out to the Universe, what manifests might not be exactly what I anticipated. The opportunity (a person) has free choice, too, and could say, “No, I don’t want to be associated with you.” It can also work in reverse. I might reject an opportunity by saying,“Sorry, you’re just not what I’m looking for. Thank you.” But this doesn’t mean give up. If the first opportunity that comes along doesn’t work out, another one (perhaps even better) will soon appear. Everything always works out for the best in the end. I’ve also learned that abundance of money will not just fall into my lap. Once an opportunity appears, hard work and determination is the real formula for success. When putting a request out to the Universe, follow these simple steps (in this exact order): A. Put the request out to the Universe by saying the following words: “How can I?” (Example: How can I get the perfect job?) B. Followed by a “thank you!” (Being grateful is very important) C. Next, believe it’s a “done deal.” (This is where most people fail.) D. Then, if necessary, take some kind of action. E. Finally, be patient. (If you have to, release the request to the Universe and let the Universe bring the opportunity to you!) In conclusion, there are three additional rules to be aware of: 1. 2. 3.

You cannot “manifest” for someone else. You cannot use energy to harm or take something away from someone. You must have good integrity and “clean” hands.

By now, you realize that I always get what I ask for, and so can you! (It’s true! Just as my angels had said, Little Angel Thumbs is being manufactured for me under my brand by that third set of people.) Just be careful what you wish for! – Linda Emmanuel 205