Radar, Hula Hoops, and Playful Pigs : 67 Digestible commentaries on the Fascinating Chemistry of Everyday Life

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and Playful Pigs 67 digestible commentaries on the fascinating chemistry of everyday

Dr.

life

JoeSchwarcz

RD2E23 2E121

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RADAR,

HULA HOOPS,

AND PLAYFUL

PIGS

RADAR,

HULA

HOOPS,

AND PLAYFUL

PIGS

67 Digestible commentaries on the Fascinating Chemistry of

Everyday Life

DR. JOE

SCHWARCZ

a W. H. Freeman and Company New York

The

publication of Radar,

Hula Hoops, and Playful Pigs has been

generously supported by the Canada Council, the Ontario Arts Council,

and the Government of Canada through the Book Publishing Industry

Development Program.

Cover design by Guylaine Regimbald. Cover

Illustration

Interior design

©David La

Fleur/SIS.

by Yolande Martel.

Interior cartoons

by Brian Gable.

Author photo by Georgio Campana. Cataloging-in-publication data available from the Library of Congress

© ECW Press

1999, 2002. First published in Canada by

ECW Press.

Published in the United States in 2001 by W. H. Freeman and Company, 41 Madison Avenue,

No

part of this

New York, New York

10010.

book may be reproduced by any mechanical,

photographic, or electronic process, or in the form of a phonographic recording, nor

may

it

be stored

in a retrieval

system, transmitted,

or otherwise copied for public or private use, without the written

permission of the publisher.

Printed in the United States of America

First

US

printing 2001.

CONTENTS

INTRODUCTION A Quest for the Right Evangelists,

An

Mad

Chemistry

Scientists,

1

and Kricket Krap

Appeal for Chemical Literacy

14

22

THOSE FASCINATING CHEMICALS! The Lot

of Lot's Wife

27

Basking in the Limelight Boyle's

Law and

a

29

High-Flying Elmo

"Der Schwarzer Berthold"

36

Movies, Collars, and Billiard Balls Jeanetics

John

32

39

43

Dillinger,

Fake Slush, and Counterfeit

Playing with Chemicals

50

Radar, Hula Hoops, and Playful Pigs

The Great Phenol Plot

The Rise and

Fall of a

58

Gas

62

Mentioning the Unmentionables

Some Magical Chemistry

69

65

54

Money

47

DOWN But

THE HATCH

Living

An

73

Natural!

It's

Can Be

78

Fatal

Eye-Catching Story

Let's

82

Have an Apple Day

Eggspertise

86

89

Chinese-Restaurant Syndrome

Hot Diggety Dog It's

97

Always Tea Time

Relishing Tomatoes

Pour the Bubbly Sole

Food

Is a

101

105

111

Good

Soupy Science

93

114

Idea

118

Soybeans, Cabbages, and Breast Cancer

God

126

of the

Gods

130

This Pulp Isn't Fiction

134

The Feet

of

The Food

Vegetable a

la

ala

137

CHEMICAL CRIMES A Love Potion Most Alice in

Lethal

Mushroomland

Chemical Witchcraft

Death by Souffle

Mad Monks, kgb

122

in

141

145

Salem

148

152

Agents, and Sleeping

Chemistry for Zombies

159

Dogs

155

HEALTH AND DISEASE Sola Dosis Facit Venerium

Anxiety about Anxiety Colorful Wastes

163

167

171

Bee Pollen and the Office of Alternative Medicine Fight Crime: Eat Chalk Feeling

No

Pain

Hormones and

178

182

the Hair Challenged

Going Nuts about Selenium Hype, Hope, and Ginseng

185

189 194

E Gets an A from Researchers The Whiff of Romance 201 Vitamin

Van Gogh's Brain

197

208

AROUND THE HOUSE Sorting

A

Out

213

the Suds

Solution to Skunk Pollution

217

Coming Clean on Laundry Products The

Little

220

Mermaid and Optical Brighteners

The Wrong Chemistry

224

227

Zeolites to the Rescue

231

SENSE OR NONSENSE? Getting a Charge out of Electrical Nonsense Illusion, Delusion, or Solution?

239

Pop Rocks and Exploding Stomachs Stranger than Fiction

Colorful Nonsense

242

246 250

"Where's the Aura?" Asks Emily Rosa

255

235

174

THE BOTTOM LINE Great

Moments

in

Fart Proudly

270

Le Petomane

275

Some

Final

Index

283

Urine History

261

Views on the Nature of Science

lo

277

INTRODUCTION

A When

I

Quest for the Right Chemistry

was about 10 years

old,

I

was

invited to a birthday

We were

party. It turned out to be a life-changing event.

tained

by

tricks

were

a teenaged all

enter-

magician with the usual repertoire; his

forgettable

— except for one. At

a point in the

less-than-bedazzling performance, the bored prestidigitator

picked up three different-colored ropes and proceeded to

them

together.

He

tie

then rolled them up in his hands and

reached into his pocket for an invisible "magic chemical,"

which he pretended

know

it,

when he

to sprinkle over the ropes.

Wouldn't you

unraveled the ropes, the knots were gone and

the three ropes had fused into one long rope! I

think even at that

sleight of

stantly

young age

I

realized that

wondering why

this

I

had witnessed

remember inconjurer had chosen to amaze us

hand and not chemical magic. But

I

with "chemicals" instead of the usual abracadabra or hocuspocus.

I

didn't

know

anything about chemistry in those days

and had no idea what chemicals were. chemicals with magic? glad

I

did.

I

I

Why

had he associated

decided to find out.

And am

I

ever

have been enthralled with the magic of chemistry

ever since that fateful birthday party.

—

11

—

RADAR HULA HOOPS, AND PLAYFUL

My

local library, as

it

PIGS

turned out, had several books on

chemical magic. Within weeks,

how

had learned

I

to change

water into "wine," prepare invisible inks, and make self-lighting candles.

dren of

all

It

was

fun. In fact,

I

chil-

from one color

and bangs. The

real

I

discovered that the real magic of chem-

istry lay elsewhere. It didn't

ity to

enjoy entertaining

ages with "chemical" magic shows. But then, as

read more and more,

solutions

I still

have anything to do with changing

to another or with

magic was to be found

unravel the mysteries of

producing puffs

in chemistry's abil-

life.

For me, an understanding of molecules and

their reactions

demystified the workings of the world and perhaps, even

more

significantly,

demonstrated the intimate link between the quality

of daily

and chemical knowledge. The fragrance of

life

a rose,

the taste of an apple, the color of a carrot, the sting of a bee, the

misery of an

allergy, the tarnishing of silver, the pleasures of

chocolate, and the secrets of love ies to

all

surrendered their myster-

an understanding of molecular behavior. Delving into

chemistry cast light upon the effects of medications, the role of cosmetics, the principles of nutrition, the risks of toxins, the effectiveness of cleaning agents, the dangers of pollutants,

the horrors of chemical warfare. It

became

couldn't possibly navigate through

life

clear to

me

that

and

you

properly without an

understanding of chemistry because basically

we

are

all

prac-

We brew coffee, we cook, we paint, we wash, we have sex. We are constantly chemically challenged.

ticing chemists.

we

eat,

We

have to make decisions about which toothpaste, which

shampoo, which detergent, and which vitamin supplement use.

We

to

are obliged, therefore, not to fear chemicals but to

learn about them.

But even the

word

this

prospect scares a lot of people. Just think of

"chemistry."

What comes

to

your mind?

Difficult?

Boring? Dangerous? Polluting? Cancer-causing? Explosive?

12

NTRODUCTION

Smelly? Unfortunately,

when

I've

asked this question before,

The association is almost always unfavorable. Occasionally someone will halfheartedly murmur IVe heard

these answers.

all

"Bunsen burner" or "periodic esting," "exciting,"

table," but the adjectives "inter-

"amazing" almost never

roll off the

tongue.

In a recent survey of students about to embark on their

chemistry course

at a large

American

university,

first

one student

would be "antiseptically arrosure what this means, but somehow I

anticipated that the experience gant." I'm not exactly

don't think he was looking forward to an agreeable experience. It is

my

ocean that as well.

I

contention that a is

intellectual dip into the vast

have not attempted to produce a chemistry textbook

here; there are tried to

little

chemistry can not only be useful but pleasurable

numerous

excellent ones around.

Nor

will also find

much

useful information

have attempted to build

here. Rather,

I

nal, scientific

thought through a

into the

I

engage in a comprehensive treatment of medications,

food additives, cosmetics, or cleaning agents, although

you

have

a

framework

topics

for ratio-

science.

the phrase "the right chemistry" actually has

13

hope

series of entertaining glimpses

nooks and crannies of the world of

To me

on these

I

two

HULA HOOPS AND PLAYFUL

RADAR. connotations.

about

how

The obvious one concerns knowing something

molecules can be expected to behave. But

look on the expression

and

PIGS

athletic

as a

metaphor for

a

I

also

good mix. Couples

teams can have the right chemistry, and so can

concepts and ideas.

I

hope

that this

book

reflects

both of these

me through some of the you'll appreciate why I'm so birthday party so many years

notions, and that after darting with

following chemical escapades glad that

I

was invited

to that

ago where a teenaged conjurer and his "magic chemical" roped

me

into the quest for "the right chemistry."

Evangelists,

Mad

Scientists,

and kricket krap

A

was once waiting

colleague of mine

at a

bus stop

after at-

tending a meeting of the Canadian Chemical Society. She noticed that a lady standing beside her

the

name

was

tag she

herself, the

woman

still

was suspiciously eyeing

sporting. Finally, unable to control

blurted out, "I can't believe that

you

people are actually advocating a chemical society." Obviously, to

this

synonymous with

concerned

evil.

lady, the

word "chemical" was

"Chemical" meant marijuana or cocaine

or heroin. She

may

Ronald Reagan

railing against a

even have recalled former us President "chemical society."

Our news-

papers are also partly to blame for the perceived notoriety of chemicals as they constantly link the pejorative adjectives. cal,"

word "chemical" with

"Dangerous chemical," "poisonous chemi-

"carcinogenic chemical," "toxic chemical" are phrases

often encountered in the press.

It

would appear

that "useful

chemicals," "safe chemicals," and "beneficial chemicals" exist. It's

feel for

do not

time to set the record straight. Let's start by getting a

those enigmatic chemicals.

14

INTRODUCTION

The

crickets

were chirping merrily

in their cages

on the Geor-

they realize that their destiny was to be

gia farm. Little did

impaled on fishhooks or ground into pet food. For now, there

was plenty

to eat;

was good. So they

life

ate

and

ate

and then

relieved themselves mightily. "Instead of disposing of the excreta in a landfill,

why

not

Why

enterprising farmer.

sell it as fertilizer?"

not, indeed? So the

thought the

doo was

neatly packaged and given the clean, scientific-sounding

"cc-84." The problem was that chemical, " people said fertilizer."

"Change

"Tell people just as

—

it

didn't

it

didn't

sound

sell.

all

name

"Sounds too

like a "natural, organic

the name," the inventive farmer thought.

how

natural the product really

is."

And

so,

"Kricket Krap," the poop of some two billion crickets was

soon being disseminated annually through stores and mailorder houses.

Robert Tilton was one of America's most popular televangelists (at least

until the

TV program Prime Time Live got through

with him). The Reverend Tilton would pray for anyone

accompanied by

sent in a written request his charities.

not really

a

who

donation to one of

The problem was

that

most of the

flock

was

actually financing lavish

exist. Tilton's

charities did

homes, an expensive boat, and even

plastic surgery for the

The minister could not deny

the evidence, but he did

preacher.

furnish an interesting excuse.

He

had been reading thousands

of prayer requests; his irrational behavior

was undoubtedly

caused by chemicals in the ink they were printed with. Plastic surgery had also become necessary to correct the damage to his capillaries

caused by these chemicals. As far

boat was concerned,

it

as the

$130,000

was of course needed to help Tilton

relax after the chemical stress he

—

15

had been under.

—

HULA HOOPS, AND PLAYFUL

RADAR.

One was

was

late-night-TV infomercial

PICS

sort of amusing. Its goal

product called "Rio," from Brazil, composed

to flog a hair

would

entirely of natural ingredients, that

"relax

your

curls

how When you use

without chemicals." The host then enlightened us about

"Rio

frees

you;

it

doesn't put

you

in

bondage.

The half-hour

chemicals you go into bondage."

sales pitch

urged us to be "chemically free" and ended with an enthusiastic

from

testimonial

coiffed

your

customer

a

who

now

formerly frizzy-haired,

opined,

neatly

death sentence for

"It's like a

hair to use chemicals."

These

stories are unrelated,

but they do have a

common

ele-

ment. Each implies that chemicals are dangerous things and

should be either avoided or replaced with "natural" or "organic" substances.

Each

also

makes

it

clear that there

is

no apprecia-

tion of the fact that chemicals are the building blocks of

all

vacuum can be "chemically free." There is that some natural substances are highly word "organic" is usually bandied about in a

matter, that only a

no recognition here toxic or that the

meaningless fashion. fact that

formed

Above

all,

chemical ingenuity, in

there less

is

no recognition of

the

than a century, has trans-

a dreary, trouble-filled existence into a brighter,

more

promising one.

Chemicals are not good or bad. They are just things building blocks of the world. will use them.

It is

The same chemical

up

to us to decide

that can kill can also cure.

Just consider the following examples. In 1943, ers struck a

ship

— the

how we

convoy of Allied ships anchored

was carrying 100 tons of mustard

gas,

the Bari harbor. Within a month, 83 of the

German bomb-

at Bari, Italy.

which

One

spilled into

men who had been

rescued from the water died. Blood samples from victims were

found to contain fewer white blood

—

16

—

cells

than normal. Since

INTRODUCTION among

these cells are

those that divide most rapidly, an idea

was born. Could mustard gas

compound

used in the treatment of Hodgkin's disease.

is still

Botulinum

cancer cells? Indeed, the

kill

toxin,

which can be

lethal in

microgram quanti-

often cited as an example of one of the most powerful

ties, is

natural toxins

known. Yet

it

has been used in the treatment of

Am-

cross-eye and in the elimination of facial frown wrinkles.

monia

is

ammonium

used to make

nitrate,

which can be used

either as an explosive or a fertilizer. Chlorine can be used as a

poison

gas,

millions

but in

its

Morphine,

fever, cholera,

a natural

as

but

painkilling effect has also

its

it

saves year.

product found in the poppy extract

known lives

water disinfectant

and diphtheria every

alternate role as a

from typhoid

opium, has ruined countless

bearable

— the very

morphine

through addiction,

made many

disease-plagued

same chemical used

fashion. Today, chemists can actually tives of

lives

make

in a different

synthetic deriva-

that retain the painkilling effects while elimi-

nating the addictive euphoria-inducing properties.

The "good"

has actually been separated from the "bad." Just like in Robert

Louis Stevenson's famous story The Strange Case of Dr. Jekyll

and Mr. Hyde: and the

Dr. Jekyll uses a chemical to separate the

evil sides of his personality.

chemistry can be termed the "Jekyll and it

can be used for good or

bombs can hearts.

also blast tunnels

Hyde"

science, since

Nitroglycerin used to

make

through mountains or help

ailing

evil.

Nuclear energy can destroy our world or free us from

our reliance on

oil.

But

just as

more news than Dr. JekylPs lives,

good

Indeed, the science of

Mr. Hyde's single murder made

entire career of saving children's

the negative side of chemicals receives

more

attention

than the positive.

Chemistry, in edies at

many

people's minds,

Minamata and Bhopal,

toxic waste.

There

is

is

linked with the trag-

acid rain, pcbs, dioxins, and

hardly a thought of aspirin or penicillin or

17

RADAR,

AND PLAYFUL

LA HOOPS

PI

OS

nylon or lightbulbs or books or television or even

insulin or

underwear

Some

Mil

—

products of the chemist's ingenuity.

all

of the blame for this does, of course,

many

shoulders of the chemical industry, since

fall

upon

the

highly publi-

cized negative events associated with chemistry can be traced

But

to profit-motivated negligence. entific

education

wonder

in

that to

our elementary schools.

them chemistry represents

bewildering antics of plots

many

cartoons. Chemistry

Whom scientist?

created

It is

therefore

the strange and

Beakman on Beakman's World or

and schemes of the generic "mad

potions, and

sci-

the real culprit. Children are not exposed to

is

enough chemistry little

fundamental

a lack of

bubbling liquids, smoking

all

is

the

scientist" seen in so

— of course — explosions.

do we blame

for the stereotypical figure of the

This ingrained image

by Mary

stein explores the

Shelley.

Her

may

mad

have been inadvertently

cleverly crafted novel Franken-

consequences of foolhardy science and leaves

us with the message that tampering with nature can lead to

unforeseen repercussions. But there

is

"I collected the instruments of life

behind

a story

this story.

around me, that

I

might

infuse a spark of being into the lifeless thing that lay at feet."

With these words, Victor Frankenstein begins

of the adventure that

Although Mary as a

would

it is

18-year-old life?

of real-life experience, so

it is

may is

doctor. Neither

girl to

Works

write such a dark,

of fiction are often born

interesting to

muse about what

have triggered the concept of Frankenstein.

First, let's get a

Frankenstein

usually thought of

astray.

scary story about creating

actual events

is

actually a thoughtful fantasy about the

consequences of science gone

What prompted an

couple of things straight.

the creator, not the monster. is

account

terrify generations of readers.

Shelley's classic 1818 tale

horror story,

his

my

Mary

And

he

Shelley's is

not a

he a "mad scientist." Victor Frankenstein

—

18

—

is

INTRODUCTION who, from

a university student

a

young

been obsessed

age, has

He

with uncovering the secrets of Heaven and Earth.

works of the

ciously reads the

Magnus and ing youth.

Paracelsus,

He becomes

when he sees The death

who

of his

more vigorously

tried to find the secret of everlast-

fascinated with the

a tree split

by

power

of electricity

a lightning bolt.

mother prompts Victor

for the secret of

failed experiments,

vora-

great alchemists, like Albertus

life.

he manages to breathe

from body

creature that he has assembled

to search even

Finally, after life

numerous

into the

famous

Mary

Shelley

parts.

does not describe the details of that creation; there

is

no men-

tion of bubbling flasks or electrical generators. All of that

was

added by the moviemakers. And, quite unlike the Boris Karloff incarnation, Frankenstein's creature learns to think and con-

verse intelligently.

It is

only

when

society shuns

him because of

appearance that he turns violent. Victor Frankenstein has

his

unintentionally unleashed a scourge

Was Mary

on

society.

Shelley herself worried about

what unbridled

science might unleash? Perhaps. She had gone to, and been

impressed by,

a public

demonstration of "galvanism." Luigi

Galvani had discovered that by touching a severed frog leg with metal instruments he caused the leg to quiver. this

phenomenon, wrongly,

had accidentally

set

up

as

"animal

a battery

He

interpreted

electricity." Actually,

with two dissimilar metals

acting as terminals and the frog's fluid as electrolyte. This

onstration had quite an impact

dreamed of witnessing

on Mary

a stillborn

he

Shelley,

dem-

and she even

baby brought back

to

life

by

electricity.

Mary married Percy Bysshe Shelley, who had left his wife and children for her. They left England because of the ensuing scandal and took a boat tour down the Rhine River, stopping at a castle that

exploits of a

had become

a tourist attraction based

on the

former inhabitant named Johan Conrad Dipple.

19

HULA HOOPS AND PLAYFUL

RADAR. Dipple was

a

PICS

who

seventeenth-century alchemist

pursued

knowledge relentlessly (shades of Victor Frankenstein). even had

it

had dug up graves and collected cadavers

that he

for macabre experiments; he

how

body worked. He

the

supposedly prolonged his

own

life,

was passionate about finding out

also created "Dipple's Oil,"

tion

—

which

and he may have died from tasting

concoctions: he met his demise foaming at the

and convulsing. The name of the

The

Rumor

mouth

castle? Castle Frankenstein.

Shelleys also stopped at another Rhine tourist attraca

museum

creatures created

featuring "automata/' ingenious clockwork

by master craftsmen. While

great disservice to label

amaze people with So the stage was

doing them

a

toys, that

is

them elaborate wind-up

what they were. Some survive

essentially

it is

to this

day and

still

their lifelike antics. set.

Mary had been impressed by

galvanism.

She had visited Castle Frankenstein and learned about Dipple's efforts to create is

therefore

The automata she had seen looked alive. It wonder that when she, her husband, and two

life.

little

friends, forced inside

ing horror stories, stein.

by

the cold Swiss weather,

Mary produced

her classic

fell

into writ-

tale of

Franken-

we must whether we

In so doing, she taught us an important lesson:

think carefully about the consequences of science, are assembling

But she

body

parts or molecules.

also inadvertently set the stage for the recurring

mad-scientist character of books, television, and movies. Victor

Frankenstein was not a crazed, goofy verted into one

by

the various

story to the screen.

And

scientist,

movie directors

but he was con-

who

brought

his

the image of the mad, self-centered,

uncaring meddler surrounded by sparking wires and bubbling flasks has

plagued scientists ever since.

Jerry Lewis didn't help matters the "nutty professor."

The

much with

his portrayal of

character wasn't malevolent, but

it

certainly established the enduring stereotype of the dimwitted,

2o

NTRODUCTION bungling chemistry professor. Then there was Fred MacMurray, the "absentminded professor"

who

invented the fascinating,

bouncing "flubber" but couldn't remember it.

Christopher Lloyd's character in Back

image of

crystallized the

how

to the

a scientist as a goofy,

he had done

Future further

misguided social

outcast.

This image has become so ingrained in our social fabric that

movie and whenever

television producers feel the

a scientist character

is

called for.

need to cater to

cur-

no

get-

rent explosion of children's science programs, there ting

away from such nerdy,

bizarre depictions.

The

is

prevailing

philosophy seems to be that science cannot stand on merit —

it

a contrived configuration of flasks

would be

Beakman

s

Guy," poses for

television's "Science

photo behind that

its

own

has to be sugarcoated, humorized, and musicalized.

Nye,

Bill

it

Even with the

alien to

any

a publicity

and beakers

Meanwhile, Beakman, of

real lab.

stilted humor The pandemonium

World, rants and raves, displaying his

incongruously

in front of

tilted

cameras.

only subsides during his consultations with Professor I.M. Boring, entist

who

with

is,

of course, the stereotypical crazy-looking sci-

German

a

grow up thinking Should 13-

we be

accent. Is

its

by and

that children

large, eccentrics?

lives to

"nerds and losers

scientists as

who

hopeless causes and are not accepted by

society because they don't

The

any wonder

surprised that an Australian survey revealed that

and 14-year-olds view

devote their

it

that scientists are,

truth of the matter

want is

to be?"

that science

is

exciting

enough on

own. Imagination, charm, and wit can certainly enhance any

presentation, but children

science

by frizzy-haired

do not have

to be cajoled into liking

scientists or

bow-tied nerds. The

splendid colors of a rainbow, a bolt of lightning, a rocket blasting skyward, an

embryo developing

drug, a biodegradable plastic

—

—

21

into a baby, a

all

—

scientific

new

cancer

wonders

that

RADAR. should rats

stir

HULA HOOPS. AND PLAYFUL

the imagination. There

PIGS

no need for

is

giant talking

or scatterbrained, white-coated hosts with pen-filled

pocket protectors to generate enthusiasm. Straightforward talk about chemicals and their role in our

can capture students' interest and put adults' concerns

lives

into perspective. So, that

it

a shot. You'll

never look

at

tv commercial about the laxative "that works naturally,

not chemically" the same self

give

let's

way

You may

again.

also find your-

wanting to argue with Meryl Streep, who,

spokeswoman

for the environmental organization the Natural

"my

Resources Defense Council, proclaimed, didn't need chemicals to a line of

in her role as

grow food."

Streep either comes from

magicians or she doesn't realize that

chemicals, be they

modern

grandparents

all fertilizers

are

synthetics or old-fashioned Kricket

Krap.

An Appeal for Chemical There were two young elevator

when

I

men

Literacy

already riding the radio-station

got in after finishing an on-air

anybody?" one of them blurted

out.

While

I

stint.

"Are you

was pondering an

appropriate answer to this deeply philosophical question, his

crony

spilled the beans: "Yeah, he's that

guy who

talks

about

chemistry on the radio." This was just the ammunition the philosopher needed. a scientist," he

"Oh

no, we're locked in an elevator with

mocked, before volunteering the information

that in high school he

had gotten about 2 percent

in chemistry,

and "that was with cheating." I've

heard

this

feel the

many a by people who somehow

kind of stuff before. After delivering

public lecture I've been approached

need to unburden their souls and

tell

me, with some sort

of perverse pride, that they slept through high-school science

22

!

classes or that

N

TRODUCTION

chemistry was the only course they had ever

Such comments are emotionally painful to anyone

tailed.

teaches science. But,

worse than

unimaginative science teaching

who

that,

they imply that poor and

may

be partly responsible for

the frightening degree of scientific ignorance that permeates

our

society.

Scientific illiteracy

amused by

is

not a laughing matter. Sure, we're

exam answers suggesting

silly

that

Benjamin

Franklin produced electricity by rubbing two cats together or that

one can identify carbon monoxide because

less smell."

But unfamiliarity with basic

give rise to

unfounded

Recently, if

I

fears

heard from

he slept under an

a

electric blanket

who was

company

had discovered

The

first

two,

I

in a

"filled

with

Costa Rican

a process for turning volcanic

beach sand into gold, and from artificial

can

concerned that

he would be

from people who had invested

dioxide in her

has an "odor-

and open the door for charlatans.

gentleman

radioactivity,"

that

it

scientific principles

a

lady

who

worried that silicon

sweetener would give her breast cancer.

hope, require no comment, but the silicon-

dioxide question presents an interesting case. Silicon dioxide

is

just sand. Apparently, the

worried lady had confused the word

"silicon" with "silicone,"

which

is

the

name

for a type of syn-

rubber that has been used in breast implants. While some

thetic

problems have been caused by silicone implants, breast cancer has not been one of them. led to

some very

Why is age in the

a

couple of

false

assumptions

fears.

there silicon dioxide in the artificial-sweetener packfirst

place? These sweeteners are so potent that

need to use very

little

of them.

They

are

as

little

silicon dioxide in

uninformed

it

our diet

is

we

mixed with substances

sand to make packages bigger and handling

such

to the

Here

but unrealistic,

real,

easier.

A

certainly not a problem, but

represents another insult to the body,

another "chemical" being foisted upon us.

£3

HULA HOOPS, AND PLAYFUL

RADAR.

PIGS

Oh, yes, those notorious chemicals! Is there any term that is more widely misunderstood? Let me offer some more examples. The Frugal Gourmet, author of bestselling cookbooks, claims that "people don't want to waste time cooking so they go to fast-food restaurants but they lose

from eating food with chemicals

would not be

On

a

good

deal, unless

five years of their lives

in it."

you

A

chemical-free meal

on

like to dine

a

a line of cosmetics that

smells profits;

I

is

"relatively free of chemicals." She

smell nonsense.

Chemical absurdity has even made

The

into the courtroom.

it

prosecutor in a California gang-fight

much

situation very

like

described "a

trial

nitrogen meeting glycerin;

it

was guar-

anteed that there would be an explosion of violence."

probably basing a

is

vacuum.

a tv talk show, an aromatherapist describes her search for

this

on some vague notion

potent explosive, but this substance

is

He was

that nitroglycerin

not made by combin-

ing nitrogen with glycerin. Actually, glycerin meets nitrogen all

the time quite peacefully: air itself

In a

more

decontamination

in

is

80 percent nitrogen.

serious vein, not long ago, cleanup crews dressed

descended on the small American city

suits

by

of Texarkana to deal with a toxic emergency caused

The

was not some

cury

spill.

—

was chemical ignorance.

a

it

culprit

careless chemical

A couple of teenagers

mer-

a

company

had found

20-kilogram batch of pure mercury in an abandoned neon-

light factory

and proceeded to have some great fun with the

shimmering substance. They played with of

it

to friends, spilled

a result, eight

ings

and

it

on the

homes had

six students

floor at

it,

distributed

home and

some

at school.

As

to be completely emptied of furnish-

ended up

in hospital,

where they had

plenty of time to contemplate the dangers of mercury, dangers

they should have learned about in high-school chemistry This mercury episode

is

pretty scary in terms of

about science education. But even more chilling

—

24

—

is

what

class.

is

says

the story of

INTRODUCTION young Nathan Zohner, who won Fair

by

getting 43 out of 50 passersby to sign a petition to ban

dihydrogen monoxide because major component of acid

rain,

of terminal cancer patients.

now

You've guessed by

more and

it

and

can be it

it is

a

can be found in the tumors

What was

this horrible

that the preceding

better science education at

when surveyed

fatal if inhaled,

chemical?

(H 2 0).

Water, of course

all levels.

is

an appeal for

We are in trouble

adolescents reveal that they view scientists as

"nerds and losers." its

the Greater Idaho Science

We

are in trouble

when

a

magazine advises

readers to drink water frequently because "one third of

water

oxygen and drinking

is

trouble

when

it is

out ever taking a

But there are fairs are

it

will

keep you

possible to graduate full

also

alert."

We

are in

from high school with-

course in chemistry, physics, or biology.

some

positive signs. High-school science

mushrooming. Some

colleges

and universities offer

programs that emphasize everyday applied science instead of esoteric theory. Perhaps the

most encouraging factor

educators are blessed with wonderful raw material:

our students show themselves to be perceptive

when guided

is

we

that

many

creative, insightful,

of

and

to see science as a fascinating, widely

applicable pursuit instead of a compilation of irrelevant and

boring concepts and formulas. There

be cultured.

developed so that

it

a

I

recently

way

met

is

ingenuity out there to

a student at a science fair

to paint a toilet seat with a

could be easily located

in the dark.

who had

luminous chemical I

suspect he won't

be signing any petitions to ban dihydrogen monoxide.

25

THOSE FASCINATING CHEMICALS!

The Lot of Lot's Wife The the

tourist guide points to a pillar of stone as the bus leaves

Dead Sea and

enters the

Negev

desert.

"That

is

Lot's wife,"

he explains in a serious tone. Ears perk up as he quickly relates the familiar Bible story of the righteous Lot and Mrs. Lot,

who

were warned by the Almighty about the impending destruction of

Sodom and Gomorrah. "They would

leave without fear of being

harmed

as

be allowed to

long as they didn't look

back upon the firestorm which would consume the

peek and immediately turned into

evil cities.

— she sneaked

But Mrs. Lot's curiosity got the better of her

a pillar of salt.

And

a

there she

has stood for millennia."

There are chuckles husbands even poke

all

around, and some of the

their wives as

if

less sensitive

to underline the hazards

of being too curious. Finally, though, the pillar story off as a bit of tourist-guide fluff. istry professor at

But

is

that

Northwestern University

all it is?

in

is

passed

A

chem-

Chicago has

ar-

gued otherwise. In a paper submitted to the prestigious Journal of the Royal Society of Medicine, Dr. I.M. Klotz has claimed that there scientific explanation for the tale of Lot's wife. In

27

an

is

a

article

AND PLAVIUL

RADAR. IIULA HOOPS, filled

TIGS

with equations, formulas, and high-powered technical

how

language, Klotz explains

turned into a pillar of

Mrs. Lot could have

calcite, a

common

form of the

literally

mineral

calcium carbonate.

Everyone knows

our bones contain calcium, but fewer

that

aware that our blood and

are

tissues also contain the mineral.

Indeed, our nervous system and heart could not function in the

absence of calcium. that

when

Without

When and

phenomenon

organic matter burns carbon dioxide

a doubt, massive

leased in the inferno of

gas,

also a well-established

It is

is

produced.

amounts of carbon dioxide were

re-

Sodom and Gomorrah.

Mrs. Lot turned around she got a good whiff of that this triggered

an instant reaction in her

tissues,

with

the calcium forming insoluble calcium carbonate. According to

Professor Klotz, she literally turned to stone, dying of "rigor

calcium carbonatus."

An interesting thesis. The journal's editors deeming

so,

lem with

it

worthy of publication. There

this fascinating

moment's

stone, even

Of

a

chemical saga:

if

human

tissues

only one prob-

the reaction with carbon dioxide

chemistry professor

A

few grams of

could never turn a body to

were

a possibility.

make such an elementary

course not. Dr. Klotz was not making a

making

is

utter nonsense.

it is

reflection immediately reveals that the

calcium present in

Could

obviously thought

error?

mistake — he was

a point.

He wanted to show how in the scientific press.

easy

it is

to get nonsense published

The people who review

articles

submit-

ted to the Journal of the Royal Society of Medicine tend to be

medical doctors. In

all

basic chemistry and

chemical discussion

likelihood, they

had long forgotten

their

assumed that Dr. Klotz's complicated

made

sense. Klotz

undoubtedly enjoyed

reading the letters to the editor that focused on the nuances of his theory.

28

fHOSE

W

!

N

'

\

I

NC

C HEMIC v.-'

o^r

What

are

we

of skepticism

to learn

is

from

very healthy

this bit of mischief?

when

That

a degree

dealing with information.

Nonsensical arguments can sound very logical and be very persuasive in the absence of pertinent background knowledge.

Perhaps the next time

we

spoon-bending, or the

latest dietary

of humanity's ailments,

mischievous chemical

read about alien abductions, psychic

we

supplement that cures

from

will benefit

reflecting

on

all

the

lot of Lot's wife.

Basking in the Limelight Everyone gets the light.

likes to

But lime

Have you from?

It

be in the limelight

chance anymore? Tungsten light

ever

now and

light,

then, but

maybe.

Or

who

halogen

— no.

wondered where

the term "limelight"

has nothing to do with the

common

comes

green fruit that,

coincidentally, happens to be called a lime. It has everything

to

do with the chemical calcium

as lime.

oxide,

lumpy, has an amazing property.

when

which

is

also

known

This white compound, which can be granular or

heated.

29

It

becomes incandescent

HULA HOOPS. AND PLAVIUL

RADAR, Before

electricity, theatrical stages

the glory of the limelight. its

chemistry.

It

The problem,

was

light

The

also a

in the light

and enabled actors to bask

light

was

spectacular,

in

and so was

scary.

little

in the theater,

were bathed

A lens fitted in front of the

generated by heating calcium oxide.

glowing lime focused the

PIOS

was

to find a

way

to heat the

lime to the necessary temperature, and the solution required

some very

clever chemistry. Starting in the early 1800s, the

flame that heated the calcium oxide was produced by burning

hydrogen

in the presence of

oxygen, but

this

was long before

these gases could be purchased in cylinders. They had to be

generated on-site. In those days, the under-stage area was a veritable chemical laboratory.

Here hydrogen was made by dropping

zinc into sulfuric acid. large,

The

gas

was then

collected and stored in

Oxygen was

bellows-shaped bags.

generated by heating

potassium chlorate with manganese dioxide. in gasbags.

pieces of

It,

too,

was stored

The hydrogen and oxygen bags were connected

the limelight

by

pipes,

to

and when illumination was needed the

emerging hydrogen was ignited. Obviously, theater

fires

were

a

constant threat.

Today, of course, lights,

but lime

we

don't have to rely on lime for spot-

itself is still in

hard to picture modern

it.

limestone (calcium carbonate) and

is

ture. It

is

it would be made by heating

the spotlight. In fact,

without

life

Lime

is

widely used in agricul-

an alkaline substance, or "base," which can be added

to soil to neutralize acidity as well as to increase calcium content. Agricultural

and

liming actually predates the Christian era,

as late as colonial times

many

farms had kilns in which

limestone was converted to lime. Since lime

is

the cheapest base available,

used to neutralize acid

problem

is

rain.

it

has even been

In Sweden, where the acid-rain

particularly serious, the "liming" of lakes

—

3o

—

is

common.

THOSE FASC NAT INC

V1ICALS!

I

Acid rain

is

caused mostly by industrial emissions of sulfur

dioxide, a gas that can

The problem

acid.

is

destroyed by spraying

which

greatly reduced a

if

form

to

sulfuric

the sulfur dioxide

largest

which uses the metal.

it

consumer of

to

lime, however,

remove impurities such

Lime has

also

been

a

The Great Wall

sands of years.

is

lime solution into a chamber through

effluent gases pass before being released into the

The

the

combine with water

Temple of Apollo were

all

is

as silicon

dioxide from

component of cement of China, the built

air.

the steel industry,

for thou-

Appian Way, and

with lime cement.

We

still

use the substance today.

At water-treatment

plants, large

amounts of lime

are used to

reduce water "hardness." Adding lime to the water causes dissolved

magnesium bicarbonate and calcium bicarbonate

(the

"hardness" minerals) to precipitate out as magnesium carbonate

and calcium carbonate. The water "softened" by

cess will not allow soap

Lime even has

scum

pro-

this

to form.

a nutritional aspect. In

Mexico,

tortillas are

made by soaking corn kernels in lime water until they become soft enough to be pounded into flour. This not traditionally

only increases the calcium content of a person's

improves the flavor of the

tortillas. If

are missing

is

it

tration of

2-aminoacetophenone,

two

Papua

it is

also

changed,

a

compound

that

is

formed

lime reacts with the amino acid tryptophan and that

flavor intensive

In

the process

but

Today we know why: they

the tortillas just don't taste right.

when

diet,

detectable at the unbelievably

is

so

low concen-

parts per billion.

New

Guinea, India, and Southeast Asia, lime

is

used in a more unusual fashion. Here, the chewing of betel nuts

is

a

popular pastime. The nuts contain arecoline,

a

com-

pound that can produce euphoric effects, and the euphoria is more intense if the nuts are chewed with lime. Apparently, arecoline is more active under alkaline conditions. Unfortu-

—

31

—

RADAR HULA HOOPS. AND PLAyiUL nately, the strongly alkaline conditions

squamous

cers: oral

malignancy

in

cell

Papua

cancer

New

Lime has even been used tein in ate, a

can also cause oral can-

the

is

PIGS

most

common

type of

Guinea. manufacture. Casein, a pro-

in glue

whey, reacts with lime to form insoluble calcium caseinsubstance used to glue

wooden

airplane parts together

during the 1930s. The glue was sold as a white powder consisting of whey, caustic soda (for solubilization), and lime. In a sterile it

world

softens

it

would have been

when degraded by

a perfect glue, but, like cheese,

microbes. Soft, like Camembert,

the glue ran out of the joints.

Although the applications of calcium oxide I've

are interesting,

always been amazed by the amount of heat released

when

lime reacts with water to produce "slaked lime," or calcium

hydroxide. This reaction

is

so exothermic that

can produce

it

temperatures as high as 700 degrees Celsius. For this reason, lime has to be kept completely dry while in storage. If

may result when water leaked

into contact with water, a fire

ships occasionally caught fire

where lime was

comes sailing

into the hold

stored.

But the most unusual lime story involves kitten years ago, fire destroyed a Japanese farmer's shed.

had been storing

provement

it

— wooden

a

urine. It

seems he

bag of lime he intended to use for

there. Initially,

no cause

A few

soil

im-

for the fire could be found,

but a couple of kittens were discovered next to the bag of lime.

They had met an unfortunate end; nature's call in the wrong place.

Law and a High-Flying Elmo

Boyle's I

had an amusing

last

time

I

was

apparently, they'd answered

little

flying

encounter with

home from

—

32

a prospective scientist

Toronto. Sitting next to

—

me

THOSE was

a small

1

\>C

\'

\

!

1

l

NC

CI

boy who was playing with

the bribe he'd extracted

being quiet during the

from the

IEMIC

U.SI

several bags of peanuts,

flight attendant in return for

flight.

The boy played happily with

the

unopened bags throughout

on a perplexed expression as we The bags had noticeably decreased in volume, prompt-

the journey, but his face took

landed.

mother where the peanuts had

ing the youngster to ask his

gone. She had no answer and told her son to stop asking so

many

silly

The lady was obviously unaware of

questions.

Boyle's Law.

Robert Boyle was born ally sent off to

side

study

at

in 1627, in Britain,

One

Eton.

and was eventu-

evening, while he

was out-

watching a spectacular display of lightning, he began to

wonder why he had not been some

special task.

self to

From

struck. In a rather unscientific

God must

fashion, he concluded that that

moment

have reserved him for

on, Boyle dedicated him-

demonstrating God's glory by unraveling the secrets of

nature.

Boyle became interested performed

in

in an

Germany by Otto von

part of the seventeenth century,

hemispherical copper bowl boiled. just

He

experiment that had been

then fitted a

enough space

Guericke. In the early

von Guericke had heated

filled

with water until the water

second bowl over the

at the joint to let

a

first

one, leaving

steam escape. After the heat

source was removed, von Guericke discovered that the bowls

had become sealed so tightly that two teams of horses couldn't pull

them

apart.

The steam had driven out

the

air,

and when

the steam inside the sphere condensed back into a liquid, a

vacuum was created. The two hemispheres were now held together by the outside air pressure.

partial

All this

may sound

a little complicated,

most of us have carried out in

our kitchens.

If

but the fact

a version of this classic

you remove 33

the lid

from

is

that

experiment

a boiling pot and

AND PLAYFUL

RADAR, IIULA HOOPS, place

it

on the counter,

you'll likely find that

The trapped steam condenses and

sticks like glue.

it

creates a

was fascinated by

surprising that Boyle

PIGS

vacuum.

isn't

It

and was

this effect

in-

spired to study the relationship between air and pressure.

Boyle's classic experiment

took a J-shaped tube sealed trap air inside

the

by

filling

at

was

a

marvel of simplicity.

the short end and proceeded to

the tube with mercury.

volume of the trapped

air

He

varied with the

cury he used and formulated the law that

is

He

found that

amount of mer-

now

studied by

every high-school student around the world: the volume of a gas

proportional to the pressure exerted on that gas.

is

This

is

exactly

experienced.

As

what

my young

On

his

it

my

was

mother about the

when

the case

Needless to venir

—

volume of the peanut package

I

say,

role to enlighten the

young man and

my

daughter to see Sesame Street Live.

such an outing involved the purchase of a sou-

in this case, a helium-filled

Mylar balloon

it

also

prompted

happen to Elmo. And

in the shape

make

beyond of course

to the car. Its escape into the great

but

was not

subtleties of Boyle's law, but this

took

of Elmo. Also needless to say, the balloon didn't

tears,

in-

landing, he could observe the reverse effect.

didn't feel

I

companion had

the airplane gained altitude and the pressure in

the cabin decreased, the creased.

traveling

a question

it

back

elicited

about what would

now

was not such an easy question

this

to

answer. If

the balloon had been

panded

in size as

it

made

floated

up

of rubber,

it

would have

ex-

in response to the decreasing

outside pressure. But temperature decreases with altitude, and gases contract with lower temperatures; this effect

expected to shrink the balloon.

working

We

in opposition. Calculations,

expansion due to reduced pressure as the

therefore have

balloon rises

it

is

then be

two

factors

however, show that the

more

significant,

should eventually burst.

34

may

and that

THOS

FASC \

\ '

NG CHEMICALS!

This was probably not the fate of the

made

is

was

balloon.

Mylar It

originally developed to serve as a heat-reflective material

in the space

but

Elmo

of polyester coated with a thin layer of aluminum.

it is

program. Mylar does not have

extremely strong

— so Elmo could

elastic properties,

rise to great heights

without bursting. In

likelihood, the helium

all

the plastic

back to

demand and

exists

due to the

diffuse through

membrane, and the collapsed balloon would

earth. This, while certainly a

not nix the still

would eventually

is

for a replacement

adored, although

loss of

Boyle's law has

fall

comforting thought, did

Elmo: Elmo number two

it is

in rather

anemic shape

helium by diffusion.

some unusual connections

as well.

The

New

England Journal of Medicine reports that a lady tourist showed in the emergency room of a hospital in Frisco, Colorado,

up

complaining of

a

"swishing" sound in her breasts. X-rays

quickly revealed the source of the problem. patient had a saline breast implant,

bag

which

is

It

seems that the

basically a plastic

with saltwater. Such implants, however, are not com-

filled

pletely filled with water

come

lady had

and therefore have

to high-altitude

according to Boyle's law, the the lower external pressure.

air

air

pockets.

Colorado from sea

level,

The and,

pockets had expanded due to

The water

inside

now had room

to

swish around. This

is

a true story, unlike the tale

flight attendant

who

enced an explosion exist,

story

after takeoff.

the small change in

pressure is

is

going around about the

purchased an inflatable bra and experi-

Although such devices do

volume due

to a decrease in cabin

not enough to cause such a spectacular

effect.

an urban myth that deserves to be deflated.

35

—

The

RADAR.

HULA HOOPS AND PLAYFUL

PIGS

"Der Schwarzer Berthold" The

inscription

on the monument

that

dominates the town

square in Freiburg, Germany, reads simply "Berthold Schwarz." Berthold, the legendary father of gunpowder, favorite scientists. Constantin Anklintzen

Berthold

when he

is

one of

my

assumed the name

joined the Franciscan order of

monks some-

time in the thirteenth century. Because of his interest in black magic, his fellow

monks began

calling

"Der Schwarzer Berthold."

He was

ested in black magic as he

was

him Black Berthold, or

not, in fact, as

much

inter-

in "black

powder," although

surely at that time the properties of black

powder must have

seemed very magical indeed. Black powder was the

form of gunpowder and,

earliest

ac-

cording to legend, was introduced into Europe by Schwarz.

— the Franciscan records Freiburg have long since been destroyed — some historians

While in

this

is

impossible to confirm

claim the reason

we cannot

Berthold's existence

is

that his

find any authentication of

name was stricken from all compounded gunpow-

records because he was reputed to have

der with Satan's blessing.

Whether Berthold Schwarz a mystery, but

one thing

is

actually lived or not will remain

certain:

he did not invent gunpow-

der.

Various formulations based on saltpeter, sulfur, and char-

coal

were known and used long before the thirteenth century.

Credit for the discovery rightly goes to the Chinese alchemists

who,

three

hundred years

earlier,

published a manuscript de-

scribing the flammability of this mixture.

They probably made

their discovery in the course of their search for elixirs that

would guarantee immortality.

Taoist philosophy dictated that

immortality could be achieved

if

the opposing forces of yin

and yang were brought into perfect harmony within the body. Saltpeter

was believed

to be rich in yin,

36

and sulfur and charcoal

THOSE FASCIN

\

I

NC

I

IEMICALSI

CI

were thought to impart yang properties. Actually, (potassium nitrate)

is

saltpeter

which allows the

rich in oxygen,

sulfur

and charcoal to burn.

The

first

uses of this fascinating concoction were in Chinese

religious ceremonies. Evil spirits, supposedly, did not like the

smoke and

fire

produced by the burning powder. What they

probably liked even shipers

less

was the bang

wrapped the powder

that resulted

tightly in paper

These early firecrackers were the world's

first

when wor-

and ignited explosives.

it.

The

hot gases produced by the combustion process had no place to

go and were forced to escape by blowing the confining paper apart,

making

because It

it

a loud noise.

the usual color of the paper

was considered the color most feared by

wasn't long before

der to a

Red was

more

human

evil spirits.

ingenuity applied black

"useful" purpose.

By

were sealing hollow bamboo poles

pow-

1044, Chinese warriors at

one end,

filling

them

with the mixture, and igniting them. The burning powder pro-

duced hot the

which escaped from the open end, propelling

gases,

bamboo

poles in the opposite direction. These primitive

rockets must have astounded their enemies.

How made the

it

first

news of the discovery of black powder eventually to

Europe

is

not

clear.

written account of the

to the legendary Berthold

monk Roger

What is clear, however, is that phenomenon is attributed not

Schwarz but to the very

real

English

Bacon. In 1247, Bacon described the explosive

nature of a mixture of 40 percent saltpeter, 30 percent charcoal,

and 30 percent until

much

sulfur.

later,

The world

didn't find out about this

because the imaginative Bacon, alarmed by

the explosive potential of his discovery, enshrouded the for-

mula

who

in a secret code.

Some

say that

it

was Berthold Schwarz

eventually solved the puzzle.

Bacon's chemistry was quite poor. His recipe resulted in inadequate combustion, leaving lots of unburned

37

fuel,

which

RADAR HULA HOOPS AND PLAYFUL was dispersed

into the air

by the hot gases produced

form of white smoke. This became tion turned, as

it

Pl


/

And

1

r

*

r

involved in ripening. Soon

produced

HA1

I'M!.

was learned

it

which

a gas called ethylene,

so a plan

that

tomato plants

initiated maturation.

was developed: pick the tomatoes while

still

green and firm, ship them to their destination, and ripen them

by exposure

to ethylene

(which was cheap and readily

green tomatoes would not spoil.

able); the

The green tomatoes were packed and gassed. They looked great

in

avail-

The plan worked.

cardboard boxes, shipped,

— red and appetizing — but

something was missing. Taste. Biting into one of these tomatoes

was not much

boxes all

came

it

right,

but

in. it

from

different

The ethylene

gas

biting into the cardboard

prompted color production

did not induce the formation of the acids and

sugars that characterize the wonderful flavor and smell of vine-

ripened tomatoes. in,

fueled

At

this point, the genetic engineers

by the hope of supplying us with

stepped

tasty tomatoes

year-round.

As

a

tomato ripens on the

vine,

it

not only develops flavor

but also begins to produce a fruit-softening enzyme called polygalacturonase.

If a

way were found to inhibit this enzyme, when ripe and shipped with-

the tomato could be picked

out danger of softening. Polygalacturonase

lo7

is

formed on the

RADAR HULA HOOPS AND PLAYFUL instructions

turn

from

a

molecule called messenger rna, which

derived from the master molecule of

is

dna molecule that holds the code particular rna is what we call a gene. Those genetic engineers had to find messenger rna before It

it

bind to other rna molecules

a jigsaw

in

dna. The part

way

a

to deactivate the

could trigger the formation of the

was known

tary molecular structures

life:

for the formation of a

of the

softening enzyme.

PIGS

if

rna molecules could

that

these had so-called

— something

complemen-

like fitting the pieces of

puzzle together.

In theory, this could be accomplished

by

inserting into the

tomato plant an "antisense" gene that would code for the

for-

mation of another messenger rna molecule that would bind or neutralize the "culprit" rna. In the early 1990s, biotechnologists at a California this,

company

called

Calgene managed to do exactly

and the "Flavr Savr" tomato was born.

Optimism esied,

prevailed. In 1993, the

"We're going to

growers, the get rich."

sellers,

Of

sell a hell

ceo of Calgene proph-

of a lot of tomatoes, and the

our shareholders

— everybody

is

going to

course, not everyone shared this view: there

was

opposition from various activists concerned about the repercussions of tinkering with food-supply genetics. In public

forums, they conjured up images from the cult classic movie

Attack of the Killer Tomatoes, in which gigantic mutant tomatoes go

on

a

murderous rampage. They threatened boycotts of

companies using the genetically engineered tomatoes and promised public tramplings of the product. This extreme opposition to the genetically altered tomato

not scientifically supportable. For awhile now, altering the genetics of

we

is

have been

our food supply using various cross-

breeding techniques, and there have been no calamities. There is

some

legitimate worry, however,

are inserted into a food.

when

For example,

—

I08

—

a

totally foreign genes

gene from nuts was

POWN

THE HATCH

recently inserted into soybeans in order to increase their nutritional value as animal feed.

soybeans would trigger Skin

Some worried

allergies in

that these altered

people sensitive to nuts.

conducted with the transgenic soybeans did,

tests

confirm that

this

was

in fact,

a possibility.

In the case of tomatoes, however,

proteins were introduced.

The only

no genes coding

for novel

effect of the genetic engi-

neering was to reduce the levels of an existing

compound

—

polygalacturonase. Even the most fervent opponents of the Flavr Savr were forced to admit that this did not represent a

but they

risk,

must be stopped terations

The

do

argued that genetic engineering of foods

still

in

its

tracks before potentially dangerous al-

occur.

bright future envisioned for the Flavr Savr has not

terialized. In taste tests, panelists

judged

it

as falling

ma-

some-

where between "cardboard" tomatoes and vine-ripened ones.

The major difficulty with the tomato undertaking, however, was a technical one; it seems the gene-insertion techniques employed were not quite

state of the art,

and the percentage of

the crop that actually acquired the desired genetic trait

low

to be economically viable. Calgene insists that

matter of time before this problem

So

we

is

don't have the Flavr Savr, but

tomatoes that

taste

good even

after

was too

it is

only a

solved.

we do

have some

Israeli

having been shipped thou-

sands of kilometers. Israeli researchers have developed a to suppress the

way

same gene that Calgene targeted using conven-

tional crossbreeding techniques.

They have

successfully

"mated" the tomato with the wild cherry, which has natural antipolygalacturonase activity. These succulent tomatoes are

now available And that is round. At research.

year-round. just

least

A

how we

it is if

should be eating tomatoes

we pay

recent study

— year-

attention to current nutritional

by the Harvard School of Public lo9

RADAR.

HULA HOOPS AND PLAyiUL

Health showed that

men who

PICS

more

eat 10 or

servings of

tomato-based foods a week have a 45 percent reduction rate in prostate cancer. Spaghetti sauce

based food consumed. tective than

most

the

is

common

Cooked tomatoes seem

raw tomatoes or tomato

juice,

to be

more pro-

probably because

from the

heat releases the red pigment lycopene

tomato-

fruit's cells.

Lycopene, a carotenoid,,may be one of the protective com-

pounds. This has prompted the production and promotion of lycopene tablets

food industry.

supplements by the health-

as cancer-fighting

And

in this case they

1999 study conducted

at the

may

have something.

Karmanos Cancer

A

Institute in

Detroit found that prostate tumors decreased in size and that the cancer

became

less aggressive in

men who were

treated

with two daily supplements of 15 milligrams of lycopene for 30 days prior to prostate surgery. specific antigen (psa), a

20 percent.

would have

would

To

get this

measure of tumor

levels of prostate-

activity, also fell

much lycopene from

fresh tomatoes

to eat about a kilogram a day; of course, then

also be ingesting other

acid and coumaric acid,

We

Blood

compounds, such

as

way

in

we we

chlorogenic

which have been linked to good

have obviously come a long

by

health.

our appreciation of

tomatoes since the days of Robert Gibbon Johnson.

Still,

Johnson's contribution to the pleasure of our palate (and, as

commemorated each August in Salem, when a man in colonial garb stands on the courthouse steps and raises a fresh New Jersey tomato to his mouth as spectators yell, "No! Don't do it." Paying no heed, he takes a

it

turns out, to our health)

big, juicy bite,

is

and then everyone

else follows suit

the tomato has the right chemistry.

llo

—

—

after

all,

DOWN

Till

MATCH

Pour the Bubbly A fascinating story is told by the guide on a tour of perhaps the most famous champagne house Chandon,

in

of bubblies.

Reims,

The

is

Madame

champagne

commissioned

glasses in order to please the king

modeled on the shape of

even better than champagne goes

so

out

the

enamored of her probably

tourists,

down from

those saucer-

glasses.

Whatever the they are the a

make

a glassblower to

who was

bosom. The story goes down well with the

tain:

glasses,

de Pompadour's breasts. Louis xv's favorite paramour,

as the fable goes,

shaped

et

Dom Perignon, the king

traditional saucer-shaped

the guide explains, were actually

Moet

the world.

in

the producer of

one thing

real etiology of the glasses,

wrong shape

presence of the bubbles

— some

tremendous amount of

effort goes into

five million in

A saucer-shaped glass provides

liquid to contact the

air,

cer-

for drinking champagne. With-

doubt, the greatest appeal of this exalted beverage

beverage.

is

every

is

the

glass.

A

keeping them in the a

wide surface for the

maximizing the

rate at

which the

bubbles escape. Ideally, therefore, champagne should be sipped

from

a

tall,

since

glass. Why should we attach so much imway we consume our champagne? Because,

narrow

portance to the

we probably

paid a king's ransom for a bottle of "the

king of wines and the wine of kings,"

from

its full,

intended effect

—

we might

in other

as well benefit

words, the bubbles

should burst in the mouth, not in the hand.

The

solubility of

carbon dioxide decreases

ture increases. Serving

the

amount

ensures that the drink

of gas that escapes before

we

comes

tempera-

as the

champagne cold therefore minimizes

we

raise the glass

experience a delightful tingling sensation into contact with our

warm

mouths.

important to drink champagne from a high-quality

111

and

when

It is

also

glass,

one

RADAR HULA HOOPS AND PLAYFUL with few imperfections. Tiny small nicks as the drink

is

air

PIGS

bubbles can get trapped

in

poured, and the dissolved carbon

dioxide then vaporizes into these bubbles. Since the carbon

dioxide

dense than the surrounding solution, the

less

is

bubbles stream to the surface. For the same reason, swizzle sticks,

which can have many surface blemishes,

are obviously

contraindicated for champagne.

So much for the bubbles. What about the drink regal beverage

Champagne

is

produced mainly from black grapes

region of France.

From

moment

the

This

itself?

in the

the pinot-

noir grapes are pressed in the vineyard, where almost fanatical care

up

is

taken to ensure that not even a trace of black skin ends

in the

receives

white

more

juice, to the

moment

the cork pops,

care and attention than

champagne

any other wine

in the

world.

Dom

Perignon, a blind monk, got the ball rolling in the

eighteenth century.

He

discovered that

sealed tightly before fermentation

if

a bottle of

wine was

was complete, the bubbles

of carbon dioxide could not escape, and an effervescent drink

would be produced. Due his blindness,

to his keen sense of smell, a result of

he was able to maximize the flavor of the wine

through judicious blending of different

champagne

is

juices.

produced by the methods

To

initiated

this day,

by

Dom

Perignon.

The blended

juices are fermented, filtered,

champagne owes the cork

is

extra sugar

its tint

to an

and bottled. Pink

added touch of red wine. Before

inserted and secured with a type of wire cage,

some

and yeast are mixed in to trigger the so-called

ondary fermentation, which takes place

sec-

in the bottle over the

course of several years. During this period, a sediment consisting

mostly of expired yeast

cells is

produced and has to be removed

through an ingenious procedure. The bottles are stored with their necks tilted

down

in racks that can be adjusted to increase

112

DWN gradually the angle of the lates in the

tilt.

left.

He

To make

sure the sludge accumu-

neck, the "remueur" walks up and

of racks giving each bottle a the

HATCH

TI1L

down

the aisles

and then to

twist to the right

little

can do about 30,000 bottles a day, but clearly

this is

not very stimulating work. The remueur has to be richly compensated, and this

is

champagne.

reflected in the final cost of the

After the secondary fermentation

complete, the bottle

is

ready for the "degorgement." The neck

is

dipped into a freez-

is

ing brine solution until the wine and sediment in the neck solidify. In the classic process, a

highly skilled "degorgeur" un-

corks the bottle, allowing the frozen plug to burst out; these

premium champagnes, the amount

days, except in the case of the real

machines perform the

task.

Sugar

is

then added

—

determining whether the champagne will be brut, sec

—

aging,

after

which the

and the cork

bottle

is

is

quickly resealed.

sec,

or demi-

A few years of

ready to be popped.

Contrary to North American

practices,

allow the cork to smash against the ceiling.

poor form to

it is

(It is

also

gauche to

drink champagne from a shoe.) The cork should be grasped

and the bottle twisted gently while pouring so the bubbles end

up a

in the glass,

not on the

floor.

French inventor has devised

a

For those lacking

when

pulled releases the pressure.

safely

removed and the cork

A couple

ago, a British beauty

a tab that

The wire cage can then be

easily pulled.

Traditionalists recoil at this development, but

avert calamity.

in dexterity,

cork outfitted with

of examples

pop

it

could help

to mind: a

few years

queen was almost blinded by

a flying

cork; and a cork once sailed right through an expensive Victorian oil painting at the

opening of an

art exhibit in Bristol.

Now that we know all about bubbles and corks and secondary fermentation, just one nagging question about champagne remains.

Is

faster? In a

it

true that

word,

yes.

champagne drinkers become

Carbon dioxide 113

inebriated

accelerates the passage

HULA HOOPS, AND PLAYFUL

RADAR,

The

of alcohol into the bloodstream.

champagne

in the

TICS

release of the gas

from the

stomach causes the valve between the stom-

ach and the small intestine to open. Since absorption from the intestine

alcohol

This

is

is

quicker than from the stomach, the effect of the

sensed faster than

a

when champagne

especially true

is

with

it is

nonbubbly beverage. is

consumed

an

in

plane, where, due to lower pressure, bubbles are even

air-

more

quickly released.

And,

finally,

what about

that old story about preserving the

an unfinished bottle of champagne by suspending a

fizz in

sil-

ver spoon inside the neck? Be forewarned that this measure will

have just the opposite of the desired

duce nucleation last

sites

it

and cause more rapid bubble

comment. Shaking

will introloss.

One

champagne before opening

a bottle of

decidedly uncouth. Such an action

is

effect:

is

only acceptable

if

it

the

contents are destined to be poured over someone's head after the Super Bowl, Stanley

Those guys can afford

Cup, or World

Sole Food "The

a

Is

Good

sardines, Jeeves, eat the sardines!" It

that Bertie Wooster, protagonist of P.G. stories,

up

his

Series has

been won.

to waste the bubbles.

Idea is

with such words

Wodehouse's beloved

implores his quick-witted gentleman's gentleman to rev

mental engine and apply

it

to extricating his master

from

yet another romantic jam. Jeeves always rises to the occasion

and hatches some clever scheme to deliver young master

Wooster from

his predicament.

on these denizens of

the deep

Whether Jeeves

is

unclear, but

actually dines

Wodehouse's

re-

peated references to fish consumption and brain power attest to the prevalence of the belief in this linkage. really

make

us smarter?

The answer

—

114

—

is

maybe.

Can

eating fish

DOWN The a

on

group of

producing is

came during the

scientists discovered that the

energy

is

1800s,

key molecule

in

— adenosine triphosphate, or atp —

phosphorous. Since atp provides us with the energy

rich in

and

claimed that

its

since fish

used up in the process, these

scientists

pro-

regeneration was the key to mental acuity.

And

is

an excellent source of phosphorous,

is

reason that

it

it

stood to

was "brain food." Today, researchers know

that

not the case. But they have discovered that another com-

is

ponent of

may

a scientific footing

cellular

for thinking

this

MATCH

attempt to put the long-held notion that "fish

first

brain food"

when

Till

known

fish, a fat

as

docosahexaenoic acid (dha),

play a very important role in brain function.

The human a sense

we're

brain all

composed of about 60 percent

is

"fatheads."

It

fat,

appears, however, that

so in the

it is

composition of brain tissue in terms of specific types of that

is

the key to predicting mental prowess.

The

fats

earliest re-

search suggesting such a connection focused on monkeys;

when

these animals

were fed

a diet deficient in

brains and eyes did not develop properly. This surprising, given that

and

dha

is

dha

dha, not

all

their

that

the primary fat found in the brain

in the retinas. Interestingly

with

is

enough, supplementing the diet

restored normal brain and eye development in the

monkeys, demonstrating that the composition of the brain

re-

sponds to dietary intake. What about humans? We're often told

we are what we eat. Do we also think with what we eat? Some interesting evidence emerges when epidemiologists

that

examine

rates of depression

incidence

is

The United tries

such

ture, a

States

as

depression.

around the world.

It

seems that the

60 times greater in some countries than in others.

and Canada are

at the

Korea and Japan have

When

fish

consumption

a is

top end, while coun-

very low incidence of

brought into

this pic-

remarkable relationship appears: countries where people

consume

a lot of fish

have low rates of depression, and coun-

115

RADAR HULA HOOPS AND PLAYFUL tries

whose

rates.

inhabitants

do not consume much

Furthermore, a study published

in the

North America and

fish exhibit high

American Journal

of Clinical Nutrition has demonstrated a link crease in depression in

PICS

between the

in-

the decline in the

consumption of DHA-rich foods. Obviously, these observations

do not

mean

necessarily

pression

risk,

that eating fish can reduce one's de-

but there does appear to be some evidence to

suggest this conclusion.

Low

concentrations of a chemical found in the cerebrospi-

nal fluid, 5-hydroxy-indolacetic acid (5-hiaa), have

conclusively linked with depression and suicide. that people

whose blood plasma contains low

low

also have

levels of 5-hiaa. Interesting.

We

been quite also

know dha

levels of

Then consider

that

researchers at the University of Surrey, as well as at Purdue,

have linked low blood levels of

when

conditions are alleviated

keted as Efalex,

is

dyslexia, attention deficit

dha

who were

that those with high

40 percent

a

supplement,

now

mar-

administered. Moreover, a study of over one

thousand elderly people

shown

dha to

and hyperactivity, and they have shown that these

disorder,

less likely to

blood

followed for nine years has levels of

dha

are

more than

develop dementia, including the

Alzheimer's variety.

Add

that demonstrated

improved short-term memory and night

to this the results of a Japanese study

vision in healthy subjects taking a

Dutch study showing

ment and tion,

and

decline

that in

dha supplements and those of elderly men cognitive impair-

was inversely associated with

a fairly consistent picture

fish

consump-

emerges. Healthy brain

function requires adequate levels of dietary dha. If

we

are looking for even

more evidence

tance of this particular fat in our diet,

than the

first

meal of our

life.

as to the

impor-

we need look no

further

Breast milk

is

a particularly con-

centrated source of dha, probably an evolutionary reflection of the importance of this fat in infant eye and brain development.

116

POWN Indeed, as of

dha

at

adding

to

HATCH

Till

more and more information about

the importance

accumulates, infant-formula manufacturers are looking it

to their product.

But what are

fully

grown people

do? Surely, oiling

dha

our brains with

dietary source of this substance

is

a

is

good

idea.

The

best

undoubtedly cold-water

fish

salmon, tuna, mackerel, and herring. While a couple of

like

week

meals a

is

dha to meet the And some cannot

thought to provide enough

brain's needs, not

everyone

is

fond of

fish.

partake because of allergies. Are these people destined to experience the progressive

breakdown of

Luckily, not. There are other

The

found

fat is

in

ways

their mental

machinery?

to increase levels of

dha.

organ meats and eggs, two foods most

people have cut back on for fear of elevating their blood cholesterol; the

dramatic decline in

among people who trend.

dha

intake in

North America

don't eat fish can actually be traced to this

The only nonanimal source of docosahexaenoic

acid

is

a

species of marine algae, the plant that serves as the source for

the

dha

in the flesh of fish. This

is

an impractical source for

humans, but techniques have been developed to extract the chemical and formulate

it

into supplements. Fish-oil supple-

ments are also available and are an alternative to eating

fish,

but

they don't solve the allergy problem, plus there's the question

— one whiff

of the smell

is

enough

to

make

a host of cats

drool. If

supplements don't appeal, there

bodies can manufacture

—

namely,

stuff

is

some dha

if

is

another solution.

fed the right

raw material

the essential fat alpha-linolenic acid (ala).

found

Our This

grow on trees, and, Cooking with canola oil, making salad

in soybeans, canola, nuts that

particularly, flaxseed.

dressing with flaxseed

oil,

the brain well lubricated.

and snacking on nuts should keep

How about a salad with pine nuts and

a flaxseed-oil dressing? If

even

—

117

this doesn't

—

sound

attractive,

HULA HOOPS. AND PLAYFUL

RADAR.

PIGS

then you'll just have to focus on research being carried out

Guelph University, where Apparently

works, and

this

meal to

scientists are feeding fish

an attempt to increase the

cattle in

dha

at

content of the meat.

meat have not

allergies to the fishy

been noted. All of this,

because

and

admit, sounds a

I'll

find

I

some

difficult to interpret.

brain

may

But

not be well oiled

eaten any fish since

complicated.

little

Maybe

it's

aspects of the research quite perplexing

was

I

a

I

do have an excuse. You

— because of an young

allergy,

I

see,

my

haven't

boy.

Soupy Science When

I

feel a

scientifically.

some

cold coming on,

I

piperine, and

some potassium

drinking the concoction.

I

physician and philosopher,

ions in hot water and

chicken soup.

kissing the hairy Pliny, the ancient

It

Maimonides, the noted

recommended much

ture of chemicals as a treatment for the it

alliin,

cannot claim any originality here.

Way back in the twelfth century, Moses

called

approach the problem

like to

This means dissolving some cysteine, some

proved to be

muzzle of

a

common

a lot

cold, only he

more popular than

mule, a therapy advocated by

Roman philosopher.

able to Europeans than soup

the same mix-

It

made from

was

also

more

accept-

freshly killed snakes,

the preferred Chinese remedy.

Can

this

mixture of chicken meat, vegetables, and spices

actually have therapeutic value? Researchers at the University

of Nebraska Medical Center in

Omaha showed

that chicken

soup does inhibit the movement of white blood

cells called

neutrophils. These cells go to the site of infection and release

enzymes

that attack bacteria

the body's

own

cells,

and

viruses, but they also attack

causing inflammation.

118

A

sore, inflamed

DOWN throat

a typical cold

is

Till.

HATCH

symptom. Somehow, chicken soup

re-

duces the inflammation effect without reducing the antiviral activity.

Cysteine, a key amino acid in the development of meat vor,

plentiful in chicken flesh

is

tion to taste

— but

it

and makes

may do more

relative of cysteine, N-acetylcysteine,

There

expel.

is

good reason

a valuable contribu-

A close chemical

than that.

used to thin mucus in the bronchial

fla-

a

is

medication often

making

tract,

it

easier to

to believe that cysteine can have a

similar effect in the body, leading to decongestion

and

easier

virus elimination.

Some support

for this possibility

comes from

native study carried out in the late 1970s at tal in

Miami. Researchers

fitted the

a rather imagi-

Mount

Sinai

Hospi-

noses of 15 volunteers with

miniature sensors capable of measuring the speed with which

mucus

eliminated.

is

They were then asked

to drink either

chicken soup, hot water, or cold water. Chicken soup was far

more

effective than cold

than hot water

at

water and was about 10 percent better

speeding up mucus flow.

Not such

impres-

when you consider that the effect lasted only half Now, I like chicken soup, but every half-hour? Mucus thinning, though, may not be the most important role for cysteine. This compound is one of the body's precursors for glutathione, a very important component of our immune sive results

an hour.

An

system.

increase in glutathione levels could certainly be

expected to boost the

Mount in

mucus flow

was

immune

system.

Maybe

the reason the

Sinai researchers did not find a significant

that they

after substituting

were using

a

improvement

chicken soup for hot water

bland soup. Just spice up that soup

and then watch the mucus flow. Haven't

we

effects of garlic, black pepper, or chilies at

all

experienced the

one time or another?

These substances almost immediately trigger rapid nasal secretions

—

"salsa sniffles" are legendary.

119

RADAR.

HULA HOOPS

Garlic contains

alliin,

AN!) PLAYFUL PICS

pepper has piperine, and

loaded with capsaicin. Alliin, as

chilies are

turns out, bears a strong

it

chemical resemblance to the active ingredient in the medication

Mucodyne, which

is

used to thin lung secretions. William

Harvey, the seventeenth-century physician

who

developed the

theory of blood circulation, recommended to his patients that they place a clove of garlic in the toe of their shoe to treat congestion. Scientists have actually confirmed that tice is

followed, the scent of garlic

if

this prac-

detectable in the breath,

is

confirming absorption into the bloodstream, but

think

it's

both have compounds that

re-

I

better to put the garlic into the soup.

Black pepper and

chilies

semble guaifenesin, an expectorant found in over-the-counter cold remedies. So does ginger, which

some adventurous cooks

add to chicken soup. The Japanese have their

remedy

for the

common

cold: they

own

with hot water or hot sake (I'm sure that

after they've

themselves with this concoction they forget colds). This raises

Could

it

ginger-based

mix grated ginger and sugar dosed

about their

all

an interesting point.

be that the real secret

is

the heat and not the dis-

solved chemicals? This question was addressed in the late

Nobel laureate Andre Lwoff and his colAharon Yerushalmi at the Weizmann Institute in Israel. Working with the assumption that the cold virus prefers to live 1980s by the French

league

in the

nose than anywhere

perature there

developed

known

a

is

else in the

body because

the tem-

about four degrees lower, these researchers

high-tech virus annihilator. This instrument,

as the

Rhinotherm, delivered

a spray of hot,

humid

pressurized air via a tube held about an inch beneath the nose.

Looking after

at the early results, the researchers

undergoing three half-hour sessions

a

three quarters of the test subjects recovered

claimed that

few hours

from

apart,

their colds

within a day. Unfortunately, follow-up studies conducted by

12o

DOWN

HATCH

TIM

others did not support this early work.

study done

at the

A

very well-designed

Cleveland Clinic actually showed that patients

fared worse with the Rhinotherm, suffering more greater congestion. Perhaps

someone should

sniffling

and

investigate load-

ing the device with chicken soup instead of water.

So we're back to chicken soup. Maybe

common balance.

cold, but

can certainly help adjust our electrolyte

it

The flow of

and out of

fluids into

body

the presence in the

sium. Dehydration, a

of a

regulated

by

sodium and potas-

number of illnesses, can other symptoms ranging

tingling sensations to diarrhea. Vegetables, parsnips in

particular,

have a very high ratio of potassium to sodium and

can correct electrolyte imbalances. In the

cells is

of the minerals

symptom

upset this balance and lead to yet

from

doesn't cure the

it

first

American ever to have

fact,

when Barney

Clark,

a heart transplant, suffered sei-

by taking various

zures due to a mineral imbalance caused

medications, the prescribed treatment was chicken soup delivered directly into the stomach Let's

now

two

place

put

liters

all

by means of

—

a feeding tube.

of this information together. In a big pot,

of cold water.

Add

six sliced carrots, three

parsnips cut in half, a whole onion, a cubed celery root, four celery stalks, half a green pepper, and eight peeled cloves of garlic.

Next comes

bouillon cubes the cysteine

least

fresh

once

secret ingredient.

six of

them.

Why

I

use Knorr chicken-

should

I

bother to extract

from the chicken when someone

done so more

some

—

my

Now, add

effectively?

dill.

a day.

Simmer

black pepper to taste and

for 40 minutes and then

Your cold

anteed. Difficult cases

else has already

will disappear within a

may

—

take a

121

full

—

seven days.

consume

at

week, guar-

hula hoops, anp playful

rapar,

Cancer

Soybeans, Cabbages, and Breast

Why

all

women

the excitement about soybeans? Because Japanese

have one-quarter the breast-cancer rate of North

American women, and Japanese ucts.

pigs

This does not necessarily

women

mean

anything to do with breast cancer

soy prod-

eat a lot of

that soy (after

consumption has there

all,

very

a

is

strong association between the disease and the wearing of skirts,

and obviously nobody thinks that the wearing of

causes breast cancer).

Still,

when we

begins to look as

entific evidence,

it

more than

chance association.

Our

just a

start

story begins in the 1940s,

if

skirts

considering the

sci-

the soy connection

when

is

Australian farmers

noticed that sheep grazing on a certain type of clover failed to

reproduce normally. The urine of these sheep was found to contain a high level of a

compound

called equol,

which had

previously been found in the urine of pregnant horses. Bacteria in the sheep's intestine, as

known as

no

it

compound

rally occurring

turned out, had converted a natu-

and equol was

in clover to equol,

to have biological activity similar to estrogen.

It

came

great surprise to scientists that an estrogen-like substance

should interfere with

known

began to wonder

pounds

fertility,

since estrogen

to play an important role in if

human

was already

They occurring com-

reproduction.

other foods had naturally

that possessed estrogenic activity.

Enter the soybean. Researchers discovered that staple contained

compounds,

collectively

known

this

Asian

as isoflavones,

that did indeed exhibit estrogen-like behavior. Genistein

and

daidzen, in particular, were of interest because they were partially

excreted in the urine and could be correlated with the

amount of soy already

in the diet. This raised

become apparent

cancer were

somehow

eyebrows, because

to scientists that estrogen

connected.

122

Women who

are

it

had

and breast exposed to

DOWN more estrogen over

a lifetime

THE HATCH were known to have

women who come

of contracting the disease, including

puberty

reach menopause

early,

dren. In other words,

number

total

it

a higher risk

into

or have few or no chil-

late,

appears that any factor that lowers the

of menstrual cycles over a lifetime lowers the

risk.

Now

let's

women. They have longer

return to Japanese

menstrual cycles, averaging 32 days compared with the North

American

could mean 30 to 40 fewer pe-

rate of 29 days. This

They

riods in a lifetime.

also have

up

to a thousand times

more

phytoestrogens in their urine than do North American

women. But

that Japanese people

we do and up

the

when we

the soybean plot really thickens

note

consume 30 times more soy products than

that those

who

North American

migrate to North America and take

and

diet

lifestyle

show cancer

rates

comparable to our own. Recent research has even revealed

a possible

mechanism

the connection between isoflavones and breast cancer. cells in breast tissue are

known

as

for

Some

estrogen responsive, mean-

ing that they contain certain proteins (estrogen receptors) to

which estrogen can bind, very much

in the fashion of a

key

This binding unleashes a sequence of events

fitting into a lock.

in the nucleus of the cell, eventually leading to the

manufacture

of certain proteins that trigger

Such abnor-

mal

cell

cell proliferation.

multiplication can lead to cancer. Isoflavones,

are actually

"weak

,,

estrogens.

They

but do not stimulate any cellular

fit

wrong key had been

be turned, but

it

seems,

into estrogen receptors

activity.

At

the

same time,

they prevent estrogen from binding with the receptor. the

it

It is as if

inserted into the lock: the key cannot

effectively prevents another

key from being

inserted.

much for associations and theory. What practical evidence we muster to show that soy consumption may actually

So can

123

HULA HOOPS AND PLAYFUL

RADAR,

prevent breast cancer?

A

number

PIGS

of animal studies have

dem-

onstrated that the consumption of soy or isolated isoflavones

Human

reduces tumor development.

data

but

less direct,

is

researchers have compared groups of breast-cancer victims

with matched controls and noted a decreased risk of up to 50 percent in premenopausal

A

classic

women who consumed

daily.

study conducted in Singapore showed that breast

cancer rates correlated inversely with the tein eaten

soy

on

More

a regular basis.

women have shown of tofu a day

is

that even

amount of soy pro-

than 20 studies of Asian

one cup of soy milk or

associated with reduced cancer risk.

been discovered that menopausal

women who

half a It

cup

has also

start eating

20 grams of soy protein powder daily (roughly equivalent to a

soy burger, a cup of soy milk, or a serving of tofu) show a reduction in the severity of menopausal symptoms, and an

added benefit

increased bone density in the spine.

is

premenopausal

women

their menstrual cycles

go, the

by

same kind of

As

far as

diet lengthens

days and dramatically increases

2.5

the isoflavone content of their urine.

It is clear

that soy has

estrogen-like activity.

And now we find out that may have yet another effect: it rate of the

genistein, the

main

isoflavone,

appears to decrease the growth

blood vessels that nourish tumors. This inhibition

may turn out to be the most important antiand it may even explain why men whose urine

of "angiogenesis"

cancer

effect,

has high levels of genistein seem to be protected cancer.

Although

esting anticancer

it

may

be that isoflavones are the most interin soybeans, there are others

—

been shown to prevent mutations

in

compounds

folic acid, for one, has

from prostate

dna. There seems to be no end to soy's benefits. Soy protein

can even lower cholesterol, and

ground beef

it

when

it

is

mixed

in

with

reduces the amount of carcinogens that form

during the broiling process.

—

124

—

DOWN There

One

are,

THE MATCH

however, some inconsistencies in the soy saga.

women showed

study of Japanese

that those with breast

cancer had consumed no less soy than a control group unaffected

by the

Chinese women,

disease.

who

eat

only about a

third of the soy-based foods that the Japanese eat, have the

same low certain

Of

rate of breast cancer.

amount of soy

is

course,

it is

protective but eating

possible that a

more

no

carries

further benefit.

Even though there

are uncertainties about the role of soy in

no harm

breast-cancer prevention, there

is

ing one's intake of isoflavones.

Remember, though,

certainly

soy products are equally good sources: soy

and tofu

ice

oil,

cream are poor sources, but tofu

tempeh, miso, soy

flour,

it is

itself,

tion.

age related

is

There

may

we

get too carried

factors.

fat,

is

a

The

and linked to excessive alcohol consump-

As

far as the fat

studies have been ambiguous;

with saturated

away with

be a connection to high levels of certain

soluble pesticides.

all

soy milk,

important to realize that breast cancer

complex disease with many possible contributing disease

that not

tofu hot dogs,

and textured soy protein contain good

doses of isoflavones. But before the isoflavones,

in increas-

fat-

content of the diet goes,

some noted an increased

risk

while others showed high risk with in-

creased carbohydrate consumption. Monounsaturated fats like

canola fruits,

oil

or olive

oil

appear to be the best choices. Exercise,

and vegetables are protective.

Particularly effective are the cruciferous vegetables, like

broccoli and cabbage. These contain indole-3-carbinol, which protects against estrogen-stimulated breast cancer.

Could

this

be the reason why, prior to unification, the breast cancer rate in East Germany, where inexpensive cabbage was a dietary ture,

was much lower than

Cabbage

is

soybeans?

in

more

affluent

fix-

West Germany?

easy enough to prepare, but what do you do with

You can soak them 125

in

water overnight and then

HULA HOOPS, AND PLAYFUL

RADAR, cook them

them

And

any other bean;

like

in the

oven or

in the

then there's tofu.

alternatively,

microwave and

ill

wind

that

is

you can

eat

them

just roast

as a snack.

How about an anticancer combo of cab-

bage and soybeans? I'm working on the

PIGS

it,

and the

taste

is

fine

—

produced may well blow good.

The Feet of God The French poet Leon-Paul Fargue inhaled deeply the

Camembert

cheese:

"Ah, the

feet of

as

he beheld

God!" he exclaimed.

A

curious, yet accurate, description of the mix of butyric acid and

methyl mercaptan, the compounds that characterize the aroma of this cheese.

The same compounds

daunting scent of sweaty

Cheeses such are ripened

as

are actually

found

in the

feet.

Camembert,

Brie, Roquefort,

and Limburger

through treatment with molds or bacteria. These

microorganisms produce a range of enzymes that slowly degrade the

fats

and proteins

flavorful, albeit smelly,

produce

a variety of

compounds. At the same

time, these

in the cheese to

why

chemical changes also cause the cheese to soften. That's surface-ripened cheeses such as those

always thin wheels;

if

I

have mentioned are

they weren't, the outer layers would

liquefy while the inner core remained hard. In case you're

wondering, the proper time to the

enzyme

little

runny

lover)

eat

one of these cheeses

activity has just reached the center,

— or "au coulant,"

would

as a

is

when

making

it

a

proper turophile (cheese

say.

The microbes

that release butyric acid

from

fats

and methyl

mercaptan from proteins in cheese are very similar to the organisms that lurk between our "?a scent ate

du Roquefort, Jacques"

means of

toes. is

The French expression

therefore a most appropri-

alerting a victim of brevibacterium epidermis to

126

DOW N

fHE H \TCII

demon-

the existence of a problem. Experiments have even

and Limburger cheese

strated that extracts of toenail clippings

have a very similar fatty-acid composition. Perhaps even more interesting

is

the observation

made by

researchers, using

naked

volunteers as mosquito bait, that the type of mosquito which dines exclusively

on the ankles and

the feet

is

also attracted to

Limburger.

more than mosquitoes

Surface-ripened cheeses can attract

— bees, for example. One of the compounds formed by microbial activity in ripening cheeses,

2-heptanone,

also,

by some

quirk of nature, happens to be the chemical that bees secrete to

warn others of impending danger. Therefore, a

good

probably not

idea to eat Roquefort cheese near a beehive.

Indulging in a

where

it's

else,

little

though,

is

Roquefort, or Brie, or a fine idea.

Camembert any-

Their microbial by-products

make for a dynamic, exhilarating flavor. But have you ever wondered how we ever managed to discover what inoculating a cheese with a slimy mold could do? By accident, of course. Cheese has been with us lar lore,

a

very long time. According to popu-

sometime around 2300

B.C. a

nomad

in the

Middle

East noted that the milk he was carrying in a bag fashioned

from the stomach of an animal curdled. Today we understand

why: an enzyme

called rennet,

—

which

127

—

is

found

in the

stomach

HULA HOOPS, AND PLAYFUL

RAOAR. lining of in

young

PIGS

animals, causes the proteins that are suspended

milk to coagulate into curds and separate from the liquidy

Remember

whey.

Little

Miss Muffet eating her "curds and

whey" and her unfortunate encounter with a spider? Soon, people began to make cheese on purpose because would keep longer than

They discovered

milk.

—

any type of milk would do

be curdled. Camel milk, however,

guinea-pig milk could

all

its

protein composition

that of other milks

and

unaffected

by

from

different

is

rennet.

Only

recently

by adding calcium phosphate

have scientists discovered that

and about 10 percent sheep milk Camel-bert here

that virtually

yak, reindeer, buffalo, and

was the exception;

is

it

we

can curdle camel milk.

we come!

As cheese making became popular, people began to manufacture large supplies and store them for future use. Caves were

ideal storage places because their cool temperatures

slowed spoilage. In some instances, however, airborne mold spores

would

find a particular cheese to be an ideal breeding

ground and then rapidly cover

it

with a fuzzy

layer.

Some

adventurous soul tasted that fuzzy stuff and discovered that it

was

delicious: the surface-ripened cheese industry

thus established. Roquefort

is

was

good example. The limestone

a

caverns at Roquefort in France harbor spores of penicillum roquefortii,

and these spores are what gave

cheese. These days, a suspension of the

the cheese,

which

is

rise to

mold

is

the classic

sprayed over

then pierced with stainless-steel needles to

allow the mold to penetrate thoroughly.

At one

time, copper needles

were used

in this process, leading

people to believe that the pigment found in blue cheeses was the product of dissolving copper. That color

by

the

mold and has nothing

to

do with the

really

produced

needles.

The ewe's

is

milk employed in the production of Roquefort cheese times bleached to

make

is

some-

the blue pigment stand out even more.

128

OWN Camembert,

Brie,

THE MATCH

and Limburger were

all

developed

in a

fashion similar to Roquefort. In each case, the particular

fla-

when microbes unique

to the area colonized

the cheese. Because these cultures have

become commercially

vors developed

available,

we

can

now

buy, for example, Canadian Brie. Cheese

may

connoisseurs argue that while this Brie" feed

— the authentic

on French

And now battle

stuff has to

be good,

that

grass.

to the crux of the

— the

moldy cheese problem

between the rindophiles and the rindophobes.

do we

not "real

it is

come from French cows

Do we,

or

not, eat the rind of the cheese? Cheese aficionados gen-

erally follow the

Roman Emperor,

wisdom

The Holy

of the great Charlemagne.

as the story goes,

dence of one of his bishops.

It

once stopped in

at

the resi-

being Friday, he was offered a

meal of cheese instead of meat. Having never seen moldy cheese before, Charlemagne proceeded to cut off the rind and eat the inside.

"Why do you do

that,

Lord Emperor ?" the

bishop asked. "You are throwing away the best part!"

Charlemagne sampled the

rind,

and he liked

it

so

much

that

he asked the bishop to send him two cartloads of the cheese every year.

finicky

when

We worry health,

remarkright — the outside of the cheese — but here North America we tend to be very

He was

ably flavorful

is

in

it

comes

to putting fuzzy

that these substances

and sometimes

we

molds into our mouths.

may somehow undermine our

express that

worry

absurd

in an

fashion.

Recently,

cap

it

off

I

was preparing

with

a lecture

a tasting session, so

variety of cheeses ranging

I

on cheese and planned

to

went out and purchased

a

from an unpretentious cottage cheese

to an aggressive goat cheese.

I

also

wanted

to include

some

noble, elegant Brie and planned to serve a local Brie of questionable breeding for the purposes of comparison, but

something even better to create the contrast: believe

—

129

—

it

I

found

or not,

RAHAR HULA IIOOPs AND PLAYFUL

PIGS

an American Brie, in a package, with the rind already removed.

The it.

I

ultimate convenience food for a rindophobe. sniffed

No

it first.

hint of the "feet of

something more akin to the armpit of

I

—

God"

plastic.

had to try instead,

Nevertheless,

came I

my

to

think

mind.

I'll

made with soy

fungal mold.

I

something better

stick to the real stuff until

comes along. Actually, cheese

I

wax

tasted the stuff. Searching for an analogy, melted floor

just

I

heard about

a

Japanese blue

flour and ripened with a special Oriental

can hardly wait to taste that one.

The Food of the Gods Let's get

something straight right off the

an aphrodisiac, and

may, however, tection

lift

our

spirits

The aphrodisiac story

is

back to 1519 and the

is

not

in love. It

fall

and perhaps even offer some proeffects of

high blood cholesterol.

an ancient one. first visit

It

goes

all

the

way

of the Spanish explorer

to Mexico. Cortes

there, in particular the

tion

Chocolate

does not cause people to

it

from the damaging

Hernando Cortes

bat.

found much to

his liking

Aztec princess Dona Marina. His

affec-

was evidently returned, because the princess introduced

Cortes to a drink made from the pods of a tree the Aztecs called "chocolatl," or

also laced

with dried

"food of the gods." The concoction was chili

peppers and, as

Dona Marina

said,

could "stimulate amorous adventures." Cortes must have been impressed by the his return to Spain

of cocoa, as

we

effects,

he presented Emperor Charles

call

because on

V with a gift

the substance today. Within a few years,

people throughout Europe were indulging in chocolate and singing

its

praises.

Except nuns, that

is:

they were forbidden to

partake because of the potential consequences. That prohibition

13o

DOWN was unnecessary, because,

Till

alas,

MATCH

chocolate does not have aphro-

The myth can be

disiac properties.

ascribed to the presence in

chocolate of general stimulants, like caffeine, theobromine, and the newly discovered anandamide.

Chocolate contains over three hundred compounds with

imposing names such

as furfuryl alcohol,

phenylacetic acid, and phenylethylamine.

dimethyl sulfide,

It is this last,

am-

phetamine-like substance that has been alluringly labeled "the

chemical of love." People in love

may

phenylethylamine (usually abbreviated

—

this

surmise

is

as

in the throes of love

levels of

pea) in their brains

based on the fact that their urine

a metabolite of pea. In other

around

have higher

words, people

who

is

richer in

are thrashing

pee differently from those

who

aren't.

This observation has stimulated the following thought process: falling in love is associated late

Not

with higher pea

contains pea; therefore, chocolate can so.

A

rise after

make

us

choco-

fall

in love.

person's blood levels of phenylethylamine

do not

he or she eats chocolate. Most of

compound

is

this

enchanting

metabolized during digestion. Furthermore,

chocolate isn't even a very good source of pea far better,

levels;

— sauerkraut

is

but that doesn't make for nearly as good a story on

Valentine's Day.

Why

are

we

so infatuated with chocolate?

something to do with anandamide,

a

Could

compound

it

have

the brain

normally produces to signal pleasure? Indeed, anandamide receptors can be stimulated

by foreign substances such

as tetra-

hydrocannabinol, or thc, the active ingredient in marijuana.

It

bears a chemical similarity to anandamide and therefore triggers pleasurable sensations. Chocolate contains itself,

so wouldn't

it

anandamide

have the same effect? Probably not.

The amount of anandamide in chocolate is actually very when compared with the amount produced naturally by

small

131

RADAR HULA HOOPS. AND PLAYFUL the body: an adult

would have

more than 10 kilograms

to eat

of chocolate to get a buzz (well,

Pl
iND DISEASE

:

'

upon

No

commercial product.

To complicate

is

often no

are present

labeling requirements exist as yet,

though some manufacturers ginsenosides.

ingestion, but there

what degree these compounds will

the concentration of

list

things further, at least 11 ginsen-

osides have been identified and their relative activities are

unknown.

The

problem was

labeling

illustrated dramatically

Swedish researchers examined 50 products sold

in

1 1

when

countries

and found that 6 samples contained no active ingredient and the concentration of ginsenosides in the other samples ranged

from

One

2 to 9 percent.

sample, sold in the United States,

contained no ginseng derivatives

at all

but had undeclared

ephedrine, a potentially dangerous stimulant. This came to light

when an

upon

a positive urine test for ephedrine.

athlete

was accused of doping himself based

He

realized that the

only possible explanation was the ginseng preparation he had taken.

An

extract of periploca sepium (Chinese silk vine)

sometimes passed off

as Siberian

is

ginseng (and remember that

Siberian ginseng isn't even ginseng).

A

30-year-old Toronto

nurse

who was

mood

swings during pregnancy gave birth to a baby with thick

pubic

hair,

taking Siberian ginseng for irritability and

and more hair covered the

infant's forehead. Peri-

ploca sepium has obvious hormonal effects.

There

is

some concern

compounds

that

may

that ginseng itself contains estrogenic

pose a threat to people with

tory of breast cancer. In

fact,

heavy ginseng users, suggesting hormonal breasts,

activity. Painful

skin rashes, insomnia, and diarrhea have

ported. Ginseng

may

a family his-

vaginal bleeding has been seen in

also

been

re-

also affect glucose levels in the blood,

causing problems for diabetics.

Some talis,

a

of the

compounds found

drug used to

in

ginseng are similar to digi-

treat congestive heart disease.

—

195

—

Conceivably,

RADAR.

HULA HOOPS, AND PLANT UL

PICS

then, certain ginseng preparations can also have an affect

the heart and should not be used indiscriminately

on

by heart

patients.

The

possible benefits of ginseng have been well studied in

the laboratory and through animal testing. There have been several interesting findings.

to

improve memory

Ginseng, for example, has been shown

in rats.

Mice placed on

a ginsenoside-rich

exposed to colon-cancer carcinogens devel-

diet before being

oped fewer tumors. As

far as

humans

go,

one Korean study

suggested that ginseng users have a significantly lower inci-

dence of cancer. Fresh ginseng extract and powder have been associated with a reduced risk of the disease but ginseng juice

and

tea

Of

have not.

may

course, ginseng users

other lifestyle effect that

may

have had some

account for the difference in can-

cer rates.

The most

on

intriguing experiments

the effects of ginseng

have involved endurance studies. Mice given ginseng extract will

run for longer intervals on a treadmill and will swim for

longer periods before becoming exhausted. Unfortunately,

many well-controlled human studies that effect. One study did show that middle-aged

there have not been

corroborate this

Swedish men

who

receive ginseng for eight

weeks have

a

greater capacity for physical work. Russian and Japanese re-

searchers have linked increased stamina and endurance with

ginseng consumption. In light of such findings, scientists have begun to describe

ginseng as an "adaptogen," meaning that

hance the body's bly,

mental

it

may somehow

stress.

Students have spoken of taking ginseng to

reduce the feelings of stress associated with exams. While

may work,

I

suspect that studying

While ginseng's potential is

that

en-

ability to adapt to physical stress and, possi-

we do not

yet

is

is

more

this

effective.

certainly tantalizing, the fact

know which 196

of

its

components

are the

HEALTH AND active ones. Yet

of

much

tions

seng

is,

is

even

if

we had

D!

this

SI

SSI

knowledge

it

might not be

help because the composition of commercial preparain general, a mystery.

Perhaps the best

consume about two grams of

to

day. This will not be cheap: ginseng

is

fresh

the

way

to try gin-

powdered root

most expensive

a

legal

crop in the world.

A

good

least 7

alternative

is

a standardized extract containing at

percent ginsenosides. This

and

energetic,

it

may

may

more

help us to feel

actually increase our physical endurance,

but keep in mind that potential cross-reactions between ginseng

and other medications have not been adequately investigated and

that, as a rule,

skepticism

too good to be true.

is

Remember

warranted

if

something sounds

that Panacea, the goddess

who

could heal every ailment, was a mythological character.

A

Vitamin E Gets an Anytime the the

bottom

ones and

bottom

issue of vitamin

line.

E comes up

Well, the

But there sure

is

bottom

in

line

is

so,

if

which

that there

is

no

a lot of fascinating information.

Vitamins are substances that

amounts,

know

people want to

Should they take supplements, and,

how much?

line.

from Researchers

we must consume,

in small

order to maintain good health. In the 1920s, re-

searchers discovered that male rats lacking a fat-soluble sub-

stance in their diets to carry their

became

young

sterile,

and female

rats

to full term. This substance

were unable

was named

vitamin E, or tocopherol, deriving from the Greek words tokos, or " birth " and phero, or "carry."

Chemical analysis revealed that vitamin

E

is

actually

com-

posed of eight related compounds. These have differing abilities to

prevent reproduction problems in

tocopherol possessing the greatest biological

197

rats,

with d-alpha-

activity.

This sub-

RADAR. stance

inevitably forms with

it

substance, "1-alpha-tocopherol,"

The

PICS

amenable to laboratory synthesis but when made

is

the lab

HULA HOOPS, AND PLAYFUL

"1-isomer," as

it

its

in

nonidentical mirror-image

which does not

exist in nature.

called, has far less biological activity

is

than the "d." Since the eight naturally occurring components of vitamin

and the synthetic ties,

"1" version

all

have different biological

E

activi-

the researchers recognized the need for a standardized unit

of measure for vitamin

E

activity.

Weight would be misleading

because one milligram of synthetic vitamin

E

— which

posed of the active "d" and the less active "1" forms not have the same effect fore, the

as

com-

is

— does

one milligram of pure "d." There-

term "international unit"

(iu)

was coined

to represent

the biological activity of one milligram of synthetic vitamin E.

By

this scale,

d-alpha-tocopherol has an activity of 1.49

iu.

This means that any tablet labeled as having two hundred iu of vitamin

E

same capacity

will have exactly the

ductive problems in

same composition

rats,

although

it

may

to prevent repro-

not have exactly the

another tablet labeled two hundred

as

"Natural" vitamin

E

tablets are generally

ing pure d-alpha-tocopherol

made by

iu.

extract-

from soybeans, while the syn-

thetic version consists of equal

amounts of d-alpha-tocopherol

and 1-alpha-tocopherol. Neither contains any of the other seven components, which are found in nature along with the d-alpha form.

However, the

great interest these days in vitamin

nothing to do with interest arises

its

effects

from vitamin

on reproduction.

antioxidant.

A

study examined

up with vitamin

body

— that

has

Instead, that

E's ability to neutralize

negative effects of oxygen in the

E

is,

some of

the

to act as an

recently conducted University of California this antioxidant activity of

a surprising finding:

E components

vitamin

E and came

gamma-tocopherol, one of the

not found in supplements, offers pro-

198

U. T H

\

ND D

I

\S

51

from some harmful oxygen by-products, such

tection

as nitro-

gen oxides, that are ignored by d-alpha-tocopherol.

The researchers

also discovered that large supplemental

doses of alpha-tocopherol have the effect of reducing the body's

absorption of gamma-tocopherol from food sources. So, even-

composition of supplements

tually, the

fied for

optimal

results.

and gamma-tocopherol

But

let

E

is

have to be modi-

combination of alpha-tocopherol

may prove

remember

us also

of vitamin

A

may

to be desirable.

that the reason for the popularity

the impressive

number

of studies demonstrating

the benefits of using the supplements that are

now

available.

For example, two studies done by Harvard researchers involving

some 135,000

vitamin

A

health professionals found that those taking

E supplements had

supplements to

one-third fewer heart attacks.

examined the

British study

men who had

clogged arteries

by angiograms. After 18 months, ments had These

a 77 percent

cholesterol

the

a

form

E

determined supple-

reduced risk of nonfatal heart attack.

ldl cholesterol

— to

as

vitamin

men who took

probably due to vitamin E's

results are

the oxidation of

effects of giving

that

ability to prevent

— commonly known

damages

as

"bad"

arteries.

Other intriguing studies using vitamin E supplements have pointed to reduced lung damage from

air pollution, a

lower

incidence of cataracts, enhanced immunity, a better response to hepatitis vaccines, disease.

Animal

and

a slowing of the progress of Alzheimer's

studies have indicated that the substance

offer protection against certain types of cancer,

vitamin

E

is

know

and

in

may

humans

to block the formation of nitrosamines,

which are potent carcinogens.

To

date,

however, no one has done

study — that

with vitamin

two

is,

E

identical

a classic intervention

groups have not been treated

or a placebo over an extended period while

their health status

is

monitored. In the absence of such a crucial

199

RADAR, study,

we

HULA HOOPS, AND PLAYFUL

are forced to

make judgments concerning

supplements based on the

ability of

dence detailed

earlier.

PICS the advis-

types of evi-

less direct

we must

In doing so, of course,

also take

into account potential harmful effects. Luckily, these are few.

Vitamin effect,

E does have an

which

anticoagulant, or blood thinning

may, in fact, partly account for the lowered inci-

dence of heart disease in some of the supplement studies. This effect

may

also indicate that vitamin

E enhances

the effect of

other medications, such as aspirin and Coumadin, that thin the

blood

Anyone

as well.

taking such medication should consult

about the wisdom of taking vitamin E.

a physician

There has also been some concern that vitamin E's

improve immune function may not be entirely theory, enhanced

such

immunity may worsen autoimmune

as arthritis, in

attacks

own

its

tissues. This,

however, has not been observed such

fatigue, headache, blurred vision,

So where does

all

as nausea, diarrhea,

there will ever be a study that is

hundreds of

is

make some good

articles that

in

cramps,

and rashes have been noted.

of this leave us? Should

we

the definitive studies are in? Unfortunately,

can do

diseases,

which the body's immune system mistakenly

practice. Rarely, side effects

we

ability to

desirable. In

just wait until

it's

unlikely that

decisive in everyone's eyes. All scientific guesses

have been published in

based on the

scientific jour-

nals.

Distillation of the evidence suggests that a daily intake of

about two to four hundred iu of vitamin this

is

optimal. Ideally,

should come from food that has a balance of

min E components. But consume

this

much

the truth

is

all

high in

that

it is

all

very

eight vitadifficult to

dietary vitamin E, especially given the fact

that the best sources are nuts, seeds,

are

E

and vegetable

oils,

which

fat.

A two-hundred-iu-daily supplement seems like a good idea, even though the currently available

2oo

pills

do not contain

all

the

V

\\n

v ii

\si

D|S|

vitamin E components found in food. Perhaps the most telling

argument for supplementation

is

make

researchers are unwilling to

that while

many

recommendation

this

E

vitamin

to the

do take supplements themselves.

public at large, most

The Whiff of Romance The

was absolutely

scent

in the dark. First,

moved down

intoxicating.

to explore her

one surged through

his

Thanks

later, a litter

some

to

University,

He

finally

One

the love

life

When

of these

the female

on the ground and

composed of hundreds of com-

of these, dimethyl disulfide, arouses the interest

We

refer to

transmitted between specific activity.

With

as a

it

members

pheromone,

a chemical signal

of the same species to

elicit a

great enthusiasm, the male seeks out the

source of this pheromone and tracks

down

the female. Inter-

estingly enough, dimethyl disulfide just attracts the male,

doesn't excite

—

mone Once fide,

A

was born.

fascinating research conducted at Rockefeller

we now know more about

deposits a watery secretion

of the male.

Testoster-

melded into one.

of Syrian golden hamsters

into estrus she drags her rear end

pounds.

and then he

sensed she was ready. There

rodents than of virtually any other animal.

comes

towards her

ear,

more erogenous zones.

body.

was now no holding back, and they few weeks

He moved

he gently sniffed behind her

him

sexually.

That job

is left

it

to another phero-

a nonvolatile protein.

the hamster has been attracted

he begins to sniff and

on her reproductive

by the dimethyl

lick the female, eventually

region.

Now

disul-

focusing

the action gets hot and

heavy. There's lots of squirming and smelling until she finally

assumes the mounting position. The male's appetite has been completely whetted by the proteinous secretion, and he wastes

—

2ol

—

RADAR,

HULA HOOPS, AND PLAYFUL

PIGS

no time taking advantage of the presented opportunity. He intromits and then, typically, runs away.

The

protein that

the furious activity has actually

elicits all

been isolated through some painstaking chemical work and appropriately

prove that

By

it

named

really

is

aphrodisin.

that substance

How

did the researchers

which

triggers copulation?

using an anesthetized male stand-in.

They propped up this him with dimethyl

surrogate in a mating position and anointed

disulfide to pique the curiosity of another male. Indeed, the

unsuspecting rodent approached, sniffed, and licked a

when

he soon became uninterested. However,

but

little,

the surrogate's

hindquarters were treated with aphrodisin, the test male's licking

became more and more vigorous

mounted

until he eventually

the "female" and attempted to satisfy his urge.

were no doubt

researchers in attendance this bizarre little scene:

it

You may

gratified to observe

proved to them that aphrodisin

indeed a copulatory pheromone.

male hamster shared their

The

One

is

suspects that neither

elation.

think aphrodisin

is

pretty powerful stuff, but

it's

nothing compared to periplanone-B, the pheromone of the

American cockroach. Males

will literally break their legs trying

to get to the source of this

compound.

Interest in cockroach

when researchers at the us Army's Natick Laboratory began to wonder how these tiny creatures find

sex attractants arose

each other in the dark (perhaps with some vague notion about enlisting the roaches for military action). It

soon became ap-

parent that some volatile chemical-messenger substance was involved, because the males in their frantically

in a box.

about

when virgin

The army

little

cages began to

scientists were,

however, unable to isolate

the chemical that had so excited the male cockroaches.

do that. At the height of

jump

females were brought into the lab

It

took

the cia to

the

Cold War, 2o2

the Central Intelligence

W'P DISEASE Agency hatched

the idea of using the cockroach scent to track

Soviet spies, cia scientists concentrated substances collected

bv passing

bugs

is,

air

over a milk jug

make

solved in a solvent to to apply a

sexual status of the

pheromone, which they then

few drops of

a

male roaches that

dis-

"cockroach perfume/' The idea concoction to a person under

this

and to track that person with

surveillance virile

with ten thousand virgin

of course, a state secret, but after nine months they did

isolate nine milligrams of the

was

filled

How they actually determined the

females.

would stampede

a cage containing

at the

whiff of the

pheromone. The agent equipped with the cockroach detector could remain safely out of sight of his quarry because those

male roaches are so sensitive to the smell.

Whether mented

this

not

is

ingenious scheme was ever actually imple-

but

clear,

we do know

that

it

has taken about

30 years to identify the exact molecular structure of the

compound

that has

come

was

to be

known

difficulty

with, but eventually about

were collected by

pound proved jar

sacrificing

periplanone-B. The

enough of the substance

major

work

just getting

as

to

two hundred micrograms 75,000 female roaches. The com-

to be extremely active.

were exposed to one-trillionth of

When

male roaches in a

a gram, they

went

into an

absolute frenzy; soon, legs were broken and bodies were tattered.

The passionate male roaches attempted

any three-dimensional

When fied, the

to copulate with

object, including each other.

cockroach aphrodisiac was isolated and identi-

this

question became what to do with

it.

The world had no

need for increased amorous adventures among cockroaches. In fact,

while in most people's minds anything that induced roaches

to beget other

stance could that

was

obvious:

little

roaches was decidedly unwelcome,

somehow

a sub-

be used to curb the roach population,

a different story.

why

if

An

application towards this end

was

not use periplanone-B to trap unwelcome guests

2o3

HULA HOOPS. AND PLAYFUL

RADAR. in the

home? As

—

synthesized in the lab

The insects

some

availability

was not

a

was to use periplanone-B

original idea

roaches to

compound could

turned out, the

it

sort of poison inside a trap.

would check

PIGS easily be

problem. to attract male

The troublesome

Roach Motel, but they would

into the

never check out. There was, however, a problem. As the roaches saw their fellows die around the associate

it

bait,

they came to

with death. They were soon scampering away un-

harmed. The answer was to use a poison that does not Traps

stantly.

now

have periplanone-B, which attracts the

roaches, and amidinohydrazone,

once they're

inside.

kill in-

which the

compound

This

acts as a

insects dine

on

stomach poison

over a period of 24 to 48 hours, and the roaches never learn to

connect the traps with their eventual demise.

Given that such fascinating pheromonal

among such

humans? After

parallel in

We

kingdom.

do have

from the anal-gland rutting

ing.

Musk

is

we

are also a part of the animal

secretions of the Ethiopian civet cat or the

— known

smell, but in dilute

all,

a special affection for fragrances derived

Himalayan musk

secretions

activity occurs

simple creatures, might there not be some sort of

as

deer. In a concentrated form, these

"musk"

—

have an extremely foul

form most humans find them very appeal-

actually the

most valuable animal product

world, selling for about $44,000 a

kilo,

in the

roughly four times the

price of gold. Luckily, adequate synthetic analogues are readily available today.

Musk leon, of

does seem to

all

people,

stir

may have

the

human

passion.

Why? Napo-

given us an important clue. Before

returning from his battles, the emperor

would write

to his

wife, Josephine, begging her not to bathe — her ripe fragrance

turned him on. Only

when

she discovered the allure of a

musk-based perfume did Napoleon culiar requests: the scent of

—

musk 2o4

finally stop issuing his pe-

satisfied his

—

primal urge the

\

wn

rH

same way Josephine's sweat

DISEASE

did.

It's

com-

interesting that a

human sweat, androstenol, believed by some researchers to be a human pheromone, has a decidedly musky smell so maybe the reason we find the smell of musk so

pound found

in

—

attractive

that

is

system

as a

And

may.

it

triggers the

it

The compound

mone" was

same receptors

human pheromone,

if

in

our olfactory

indeed such a thing

some have dubbed a "human pherofirst isolated from swine testes in the early

that

actually

1970s. Androstenol

was the scent

that

prompted female

assume the appropriate position for copulation. The so dramatic that androstenol ers in a

exists.

spray can to

was soon made

facilitate artificial

pigs to

effect

available to farm-

A

insemination.

sow would become ready

whiff of the substance and a

was tiny

to ac-

cept the inseminating rod calmly.

The pheromone stenol

was found

What was

saga then took an unexpected turn.

a pig sex attractant

searchers accidentally stumbled

human This

Andro-

human underarm secretions. doing in human sweat? Had re-

to be present in

upon

a substance that

was

a

sex attractant as well? is

not

as

outlandish as

it

sounds. Think about

why

Elizabethan lovers placed apples in their armpits until they

were saturated with sweat before offering these "love apples" to their sweethearts.

below her

women

And why

partner's armpit?

does a dancing

Why

do

artists

their

twirl

so often portray

with raised arms? Doesn't the Venus de Milo seem to

invite us directly to sniff her armpit?

women

woman

Why

is

it

that

when

are asked to strike a sexy pose, they automatically raise

arm and

place a

something magical

in

hand behind

their necks?

Could

there be

armpit fragrance?

Researchers began to sweat over the problem. In an English theater, seats

women. Of

sprayed with androstenol seemed to attract more course, rose fragrance might have

£o5

done the same.

HULA HOOPS, AND PLAYFUL

RADAR.

When men were unknowingly were judged more

attractive

PIGS

anointed with androstenol, they

by women but were downgraded

by men. Intriguing observations, but not

the stuff of hard

science.

Hard

science did finally break through in the 1980s with a

series of

remarkable publications by George Preti of the Monell

Chemical Senses Center

and Winnifred Cutler,

in Philadelphia

then of the University of Pennsylvania. These scientists showed that

when an

extract of

male armpit secretions was applied to

the upper lips of female volunteers those

extract

was applied

in the

women

when

regular menstrual cycles. Furthermore,

same fashion, the

had more

female armpit

women

began to

have synchronized periods. There certainly seemed to be some sort of chemical

communication going on.

Cutler, at that point founder tute for

Women,

and head of the Athena

Insti-

then went one step further. She studied the

sexual behavior of

young women who had "female essence"

derived from armpit secretions applied under their noses three times a

week

significantly

for about three months. These

more frequent

treated with a placebo.

creased desire or

Then

made

women

engaged in

sexual activity than control subjects

The female essence somehow more

the wearer

attractive to

either in-

men.

science took a leap of faith. Dr. Cutler began selling

"Pheromone

10:13," a synthetic version of the

The

ingredient in female essence.

supposed active

actual composition of the

product has not been revealed, and the only evidence of

effi-

cacy comes from anecdotal customer testimonials: "Jan from

Arizona"

tells

us that

"men have been

honeybees," while "Thelma from

name her motor home Cutler

is

on firmer

mone 10X tm"

for

the

flying

around

New Jersey"

me

like

has had to re-

Love Shack.

scientific

ground with her "Athena Phero-

men, described

as a

perfume and aftershave

additive designed to increase sex appeal.

2o6

The formulation

of

H

!

\

this

that

product it

is

' .

also a closely

\

ND D

guarded

\$]

SI

I

but

secret,

have a feeling

I

might also prove to be of interest to sows. In any

case,

Dr. Cutler has just published a peer-reviewed scientific article in

which she maintains

that

men who

use the product increase

the frequency of their romantic encounters, particularly sexual intercourse. Exciting stuff.

David the

Berliner,

former professor of anatomy and founder of

erox corporation, has taken another approach. Back

in the

1960s he noted that a skin extract he had prepared had the effect of putting his lab

moods.

He

workers

in uncharacteristic

of his mind. Then, a couple of decades

was rekindled when

mans of

good

stored this curious information in the deep recesses

scientists

a nasal detection

later, Berliner's interest

confirmed the presence in hu-

system

known

vomeronasal

as the

organ (vno), heretofore found only in animals. This tiny

slit

located

on the septum about

the nostril detects molecules that have the

vno

When

that detects

it is

pheromones

half an inch inside

no apparent

surgically removed, the animals

their mates. Here, Berliner realized,

was

smell. It

is

and hamsters.

in rats, mice,

do not respond

to

a potential sensor for

human pheromones. Berliner

worked out

nose to measure any

a

way

electrical

to insert a tiny

response in the

exposure to potential pheromones.

compounds from

He

probe into the

vno

as a result of

soon found that two

his original skin extract triggered

very

differ-

vno activity only in only in women. Although he has

ent responses. Androstadienone caused

men and

estratetraenol did so

not been able to document any behavioral effects due to these

compounds, he has

built his

Realm product

Realm products make no claim

line

around them.

for aphrodisiac effects: indeed,

the male version contains the chemical sensed only the female version the one sensed only (so far scientifically unsupported)

£o7

is

by men and

by women. The object

to alter the wearer's

mood

HULA HOOPS, AND PLAYFUL

RADAR,

by exposing him or her

pheromone

to the

Ph

by

released

ber of the opposite sex and perhaps create an

a

mem-

of confidence

air

leading to romantic interludes.

Until

we have more

tising for

musk products

to have "an exciting

a

is

not

all

Musk

hype. Wild

Oil claims

releases

your

wonders for your chemistry." Maybe

dab behind the ear

little

human phero-

musk. Maybe the adver-

just stick to

and provocative fragrance that

sensuality and does

does —

evidence about

scientific

mones we should perhaps

... a

whiff

.

.

it

who knows?

.

Van Gogh's Brain On

December

23, 1888, a prostitute in the

town of Aries

in

southern France received a strange Christmas present: a package,

wrapped

in

newspaper, containing part of a

the ear of Vincent

Van Gogh.

in this fashion after returning

Why the

artist

home from

human

ear

—

mutilated himself

a visit to the brothel

has been the subject of intense conjecture.

Van Gogh's ings,

such

as

artistic career

The Potato

conveying the

Dutch

artist's

peasant.

began in Holland. His early paint-

Eaters,

were dark and somber,

sympathy with the hard

A move

to Paris,

and

later to

had

a dramatic effect on Van Gogh's

and

a bright light flooded his

best-known painting of

style.

life

clearly

of the poor

southern France,

Darkness abated

work. Sunflowers, perhaps the

this period,

is

a veritable explosion of

brilliant yellows.

Some have

suggested that there was more to this light and

color change than the mood-boosting effect of the sun in

southern France. Van chotic

fits,

epilepsy.

which

Gogh was known

at the

to suffer

from psy-

time were identified as stemming from

Treatment often involved

digitalis, the heart-disease

medication discovered by Englishman William Withering.

£08

We

\\

believe that

wn

I"H

Van Gogh was

DISEASE

treated with this inappropriate

medication because he painted a portrait of his physician, Dr. Gachet, holding talis is

a stalk of foxglove, the plant

from which

extracted.

Large doses of

digitalis

visual disturbances.

can cause vomiting, giddiness, and

Van Gogh's

later paintings reflect his obses-

sion with the color yellow, as best exemplified

He

digi-

even painted his house

at

by Sunflowers.

Auvers yellow. Abnormalities

in

color perception — particularly the appearance of yellow halos around objects — have indeed been associated with the use of digitalis.

Ascribing Van Gogh's medical problems to

poisoning

A 796

interesting, although

middle-ear condition

also have

a

is

letters

man

somewhat

known

as

Meniere's disease

been a source of Van Gogh's problems. he wrote to his brother Theo give

suffering

from

digitalis

fanciful.

A

may

review of

rise to a picture

of

attacks of disabling, recurrent vertigo and

nausea, as well as sensory hallucinations. These attacks were also characterized

by an

sounds. Between these

inability to tolerate

"fits," as

motion and loud

Van Gogh himself called them,

there were long symptom-free periods, as

is

often the case with

Meniere's disease. Auditory hallucinations, or ringing in the ears (tinnitus), are also

common. 2o9

In

fact,

some

patients speak of

RADAR,

HULA HOOPS. AND PLAYFUL

"cutting off their ear" or "poking a hole in to relieve the torment.

The symptoms

it

PIGS

with an

ice

pick"

of Meniere's disease

do

appear to be consistent with those suffered by Van Gogh, and they present a plausible rationale for his self-mutilation on that fateful

day

There

is

in 1888.

yet another possible explanation for

of bizarre behavior, and

Van Gogh's

fits

based on his well-known addic-

it is

tion to a popular beverage of the time, absinthe, the standard

ingredients of

which

are alcohol, oil of

wormwood,

anise, fen-

nel, juniper, and nutmeg. The oil of wormwood is of particular interest here. The active ingredient in wormwood is thujone, a

compound

that can induce excitement of the nervous system

followed by unconsciousness and convulsions. In

fact,

the

condition induced by thujone has been studied as a model for epilepsy.

much

Because absinthe caused so

government banned

it

misery, the French

in the early part of this century. Its

descendent, Pernod, which does not contain thujone, available

and

from green

still

intrigues people

to white

by changing

when water

is

that are soluble in alcohol but not in water,

There

is

no question

(as

added to

to visit, the

Compounds

now precipitate

absinthe during his days in southern France.

Gauguin came

two

binges together and Vincent

painters

would

On

out.

heavily in

When

Paul

would go on absinthe

invariably end

up

brothel (probably claiming that absinthe makes the tart fonder).

still

does absinthe)

it.

Van Gogh indulged

that

is

in a

grow

one of these eventful nights, he quarreled with

Gauguin, threw a

glass of absinthe at

with a razor. Then, in an agony of

him, and threatened him guilt,

he retreated to his

room and performed the celebrated surgery. We will never know whether Vincent Van Gogh's

suicide in

1890 was due to epilepsy, Meniere's disease, thujone poisoning, or some other factor.

Some

art historians

claim that he sus-

tained a cerebral lesion during birth and suggest that this

21o

was

v 'M \ND DISEASE the

main

trigger of his aberrant behavior. In

son he shot himself behind he had depicted in his

field

The

painting

is

any

case, the rea-

manure heap near the very wheat

a

last

canvas will remain a mystery.

of a road that ends abruptly in the middle of a

field of

wild yellow wheat; according to some, the road sym-

bolizes

Van Gogh's short

After

former

Van Gogh's

life.

death, Dr. Gachet planted a tree

patient's grave.

on

his

Brother Theo died soon after and was

buried elsewhere, but 23 years later relatives decided that the brothers,

who had

been extremely close in

life,

should be near

each other in death, and they arranged to bury the two in the

same

plot.

When

Vincent was dug up, his casket was found

to be completely entwined in the roots of the tree planted

Dr. Gachet. tree, the

The doctor had unknowingly chosen

source of thujone: in death, as in

Gogh found

life,

himself in the clutches of thujone.

211

—

a

by

wormwood Vincent van

AROUND THE HOUSE

Out the

Sorting Periodically,

I

pharmacy

the

ises.

like to take a stroll

to see

Suds

down

the

shampoo

aisle in

what the current crop of products prom-

Will this one or that one "energize"

my

hair?

Add

luster

or remove buildup? Nourish or rejuvenate? What's the newest miracle ingredient? fruit

Sperm

extract or quinine?

complex or beta-carotene?

sometimes

it's

hard to

tell if

It's all

Alpha hydroxy

very confusing. Indeed

you're in a pharmacy or a super-

market, with shampoos loudly proclaiming that they contain

mango, papaya, apple whatever that ently agrees.

of

may

pectin,

be. It

wheat germ, or Swiss

vanilla,

sounds outrageous. Revlon appar-

all

The cosmetics company has come out with

shampoos appropriately

a line

"Outrageous!"

called

This bewildering cacophony of claims and esoteric ingredients

is

a

product of the basic dilemma faced by shampoo

manufacturers.

How

do you convert an

essentially simple

product that cleans hair into a magical lotion that increases sex appeal?

The answer

lies

in

some

basic science and a lot of

clever marketing. First of

revive hair.

all,

shampoos do not

They

can't, for the

feed, resuscitate, enliven, or

simple reason that hair

213

is

not

HULA MOOTS. AND PLAYIUL

RADAR,

So what can shampoos do? They can clean

alive.

PIGS

of them can perform the task very well because cult. All

called

they must do

is

remove the thin

magnet for

dirt

it's

not

diffi-

layer of oily material,

sebum, that coats and protects the

also acts as a

And any

hair.

hair,

because sebum

and for residue from hair-treatment

products.

Detergents can remove sebum very effectively and are the

prime ingredients

in all

tension of water, making a dissolved detergent will

shampoos. They reduce the surface it

flow more

freely.

Water mixed with

not form beads but will spread

easily,

wetting every nook and cranny of a surface.

Detergent molecules also form strong water. in

One end

of the molecule

fat soluble

is

any oily residue. The other end

quence,

when

between

and anchors

water soluble. As is

oil

a

and

itself

conse-

rinsed away, fatty sub-

sebum, are pulled away from the surface to

are attached.

as well as the

is

a detergent solution

stances, such as

which they

ties

The cheapest shampoo

most expensive. In

tergent,

which contains sodium

dient in

most shampoos.

fact,

will clean hair

so will dishwashing de-

lauryl sulfate, the active ingre-

Sodium lauryl sulfate is a great cleaning agent, but it strips sebum from the hair so thoroughly that it leaves the hair very dry. It

may

lutely

no truth

occasionally cause skin irritation, but there to the

rumor

that

it

causes cancer.

abso-

is

To prevent

it is usually combined with other less harsh, but genmore expensive detergents like ammonium laureth sul-

dryness, erally fate.

Quaternary

ammonium compounds, known

as quats, are

also added to shampoos to allow for easy detangling

combing. These are the same compounds found eners,

when

in fabric soft-

and they work by clinging to the surface of the

producing a smooth

finish.

Foam

boosters, such as cocamide

monoethanolamine, are often incorporated; not that anything to do with cleaning

—

—

it

214

hair,

this has

doesn't. Hair can be cleaned

—

UIOUND

HOUSE

Tllh

without any suds, but suds

effectively

shampoos

shampoos. Some

sell

also include panthenol, a molecule that can diffuse

and bind to proteins, strengthening

into the hair shaft

structure. Various proteins, such as elastin

their

and collagen, or

synthetic polymers, are often added with the idea that they will

bind to the surface of the hair to enhance thickness. Results are

most of these substances end up being rinsed

variable because

away with

the detergent.

no matter how

All shampoos,

mon

gentle,

must cope with

problem. As the protective sebum

outside layer of the hair, the cuticle,

is

is

a

com-

stripped away, the

exposed. In healthy

hair,

the cuticle consists of translucent cells that overlap like shingles

on

a roof. In

ragged.

As

damaged

The

away

hair."

charge can be produced by the transfer of elec-

result

Ideally, a

the dreaded affliction referred to as "fly-

is

shampoo

as the

seal up, so all

are

"pH

smooth down the

by controlling

readily achieved

As long

will

cuticle

and give

it

sebum-like material. The smoothing effect

a clean coating of a is

more open and

the rough adjacent hairs rub against each other, a

static electrical

trons.

hair, these shingles are

pH is

between

five

the acidity of the shampoo.

and

eight, the "shingles" will

shampoos, whether they make the claim or not,

balanced."

The proper

pH

range

maintained by the

is

addition of buffering agents such as citric acid. Humectants,

which help hold

in moisture, are also added.

glycerol or propylene glycol, ter

and prevent

it

to

is

know

a

of the soiled

more formidable

that

it is

to

wa-

from evaporating.

The replacement coating

Examples are

which form strong bonds

sebum with

task. After

all,

a clean protective

how

is

a

shampoo

supposed to remove one oily substance and

leave behind another?

Modern "two-in-one" formulations a long way

with shampoo and conditioner combined have gone

towards solving

this

problem. Silicones, such

215

as

dimethicone,

R

A D A R HULA HOOPS, A N D

AV

L

P

,

I

U

PIGS

L

are relatively nongreasy materials that resemble

sebum. They

add gloss, and provide a smooth surface to They can also fill in the damaged areas where the cuticle has been worn away and change the reflective properties of hair, producing more shine. Through some clever chemistry, techniques have been developed to hold silicones in suspension in a shampoo until the shampoo is rinsed away with lots of water. So, during the can coat the

hair,

ease combing.

shampooing process, while the detergent are held in a sort of state of

poo

is

active, the silicones

suspended animation. As the sham-

hair.

washed out, the silicones are activated and they coat the The results can be very satisfying, but two-in-ones still

can't

match the

is

shampooing and conditioning

effectiveness of

separately.

The tisers

search for novel ingredients that can be

seems never ending.

How

hyped by adver-

about sperm shampoo? This

pricey product touts the wonders of hyaluronic acid as the

answer to bad hair days.

Why?

uses to penetrate the egg

it is

the hair shaft. Hyaluronic acid

penetration stuff It's

a lot of

likely that after

you ever cared there

is

is

to

all

know

is

good

a

to finding

to penetrate

moisturizer, but the

bunk.

of this most of

one you

slow motion on TV have

So forget the

vitamins in

you know more than

pill

and find

like

who

by

trial

and

told, while

it

it all

Remem-

error.

toss their luxuriant tresses in

just spent

hours with expert hairdress-

ads, think of fruit salad as a dessert, take

your

form, use sperm more appropriately, ignore the a

product you

like.

In

fact, I

often

with diluted dishwashing detergent. Although drying,

what sperm

is

about shampoos. Truth be

ber that those young ladies

price,

this acid

a lot of interesting science behind these products,

comes down

ers.

Because

somehow supposed

cleans well and smells nice

— but

have an unusual desire to go and scrub

216

a

wash

it is

I

my hair

somewhat

do sometimes

few pots and pans.

UtOUND

A I

Solution to Skunk Pollution

remember

the

someone had was

a lot

HOUSE

Till.

first

ever smelled a skunk.

I

off a stink

let

more

time

bomb. You

familiar with emissions

see,

I

thought

even back then

from

test

from animals. Skunk secretion certainly smelled

I

tubes than

like a

mixture

of sodium sulfide and an acid. Such a concoction releases hy-

drogen

sulfide,

which accounts for the

classic

reek of rotten

eggs and stink bombs, a smell potent enough to drive away any living creature,

skunk has

the

and quickly. Which, of course, in

mind when

it

little

what scent

rectum.

its

have long been intrigued by the chemical compo-

Scientists sition of

exactly

loose from the

lets

glands situated on either side of

is

skunk aroma.

Way

back

famous German

in 1862, the

chemist Friedrich Wohler received a

gift

of "Nordamerikan-

ischen Stinkthiers" fluid from a "freunde in Neuyork." stuff it

to

was too smelly for the one of

great

Ghent. Swarts carried out the

and found

it

man

to

his underlings, identified

to be a

work with,

only

as Dr.

analysis of

first

so he gave

Swarts of

skunk secretion

complex mixture of many substances

He was

distilled at different temperatures.

The

that

able to determine,

however, that the element sulfur was prevalent in the mixture,

making up some 16 percent of pay

its

weight. There was a price to

enlightenment: Wohler claimed that his assistant's

for this

health had been adversely affected.

Although chemists have been working on the problem of the exact composition of

skunk secretions for over

years, only recently have the specific smelly identified. This type of research

of

all,

how

is

a

hundred

compounds been

fraught with difficulty. First

does one procure a sample? Very carefully. Skunks

are trapped

and anesthetized with

ether.

A

blunt needle

is

then inserted into the anal sac of the animal and the contents

removed by means of

a syringe.

217

This sample

is

subjected to

RADAR,

HULA HOOPS, AND PLAVIUL

PICS

known

analysis through an instrumental technique

as gas

matography-mass spectrometry, which separates and the

components of

a mixture. Literally

chro-

identifies

dozens of compounds

have been found in skunk extract, with seven having particuTrans-2-butene-l -thiol

larly disturbing smells.

is

the major

culprit.

Now

that

we know

what do we do with the knowl-

this,

edge? While skunk research

what we tive

really

dog or

want

is

may

a solution to the

and

thiol

will

do

is

its it

problem of the

cat that has learned a lesson the

consequences of skunk chasing.

won't do

be academically fascinating,

How

hard

inquisi-

way about

the

can trans-2-butene-l-

chemical cousins be neutralized? Tomato juice

—

that's just a

myth. The only thing tomato juice

added problem of

create a mess, leaving us with the

removing tomato also turn white

But despair

juice

from

clothing, floors,

and

walls. It will

dogs pink.

not: there

the Indiglo watch.

The

is

a solution, thanks to the creators of

faces of these watches are treated with

an electroluminescent material that glows in the dark.

An

un-

fortunate by-product of the manufacturing process used to

make does

this this

luminescent substance

compound

is

hydrogen

smell awful, but

materials engineer, Paul

it is

Krebaum, working

sulfide.

Not only

also poisonous. at the plant

A

where

the electroluminescent materials were manufactured, devel-

oped

a technique for eliminating the smell.

tem whereby the

air

was

He

designed a sys-

circulated through a solution of

concentrated hydrogen peroxide and sodium hydroxide. His idea

was based on some

interesting chemistry.

Krebaum knew

that sulfur binds quite readily to oxygen and that these oxi-

dized derivatives are far

showed

less likely to smell.

that an alkaline solution of

hydrogen peroxide readily

oxidizes hydrogen sulfide to odor-free sulfate. the hydrogen sulfide smell in the plant

218

Experiments

was

The problem of

solved.

GROUND One

Krebaum's came to work with

day, a colleague of

woeful

tale

HOUSE

Till.

a

of an encounter between his dog and a skunk.

Krebaum had never considered the skunk problem before, but he knew that skunk secretions contained thiols. These resembled hydrogen sulfide chemically and should also be oxi-

Krebaum knew, however,

dized with his reagent.

that he

couldn't expose animals to 30 percent hydrogen peroxide far too

it's

dangerous

a substance, as

formula had to be modified. that 3 percent peroxide

A

is

little

—

sodium hydroxide. The

experimentation revealed

would work and

that the

sodium hy-

droxide could be replaced with baking soda. Finally, a squirt of

dishwashing detergent would help

from the

Here

lift

the

skunk fragrance

fur.

is

the magic formula: take one

gen peroxide (available

liter

of 3 percent hydro-

most pharmacies), add one-quarter

at

cup of baking soda and one teaspoon of liquid dishwashing detergent, rinse

with

wash

dog

the cat or

(or child) with this mixture,

lots of water. Presto!

Skunk smell

and

almost com-

is

pletely eliminated.

The

latter

point

an important one. People

is

who

have

struggled with tomato juice and have succeeded in reducing

skunk smell (not due to

managed physically

a

chemical effect but because they have

to rinse

pounds) often note that the the

skunk secretions

acetates,

which

also contain

compounds

thiols.

skunk aroma

line conditions created

by

As

the concentration of thiols

returns, but

under the mildly alka-

the hydrogen peroxide recipe, these

thioacetates are immediately converted to thiols, are oxidized. Therefore, the lingering smell

Most stench

called thio-

are not particularly smelly but over time react

with moisture to form increases, the

away some of the odiferous comscent comes back. This is because

is

which

in turn

greatly reduced.

researchers are interested in eliminating the skunk

— but not

all.

Skunk smell 219

is

known

to keep bears

away

HULA HOOPS, AND PLAYFUL

RADAR,

and to mask the scent of humans. This

PICS

of great interest to

is

hunters, because their scent can often drive their prey away. course,

nobody would want

extract,

even

if

to carry

Of

around bottles of skunk

such a thing were available. The risk of an inad-

would be just too great. But a clever inventor has come up with not one but two solutions to this problem.

vertent spill

"Skunk Skreen" comes thiol precursor, acts

two small

bottles.

with the alkaline solution contained

When

One

contains a it

re-

in the other bottle.

circumstances dictate, moisten a cloth with a few drops

from each

bottle,

and prepare yourself for

powerful skunk-

a

Bear beware!

like stench.

As we know, is

in

which forms the stinky compound when

the stench can also keep

humans away, which

what an Alaskan inventor was banking on when he patented

a "personal protector" based

hasn't the time to start

on skunk

Because

smell.

a

person

combining chemicals when accosted by

way

an attacker, the inventor devised a

to incorporate skunk-

extract capsules in a plastic card resembling a credit card. In an

emergency,

all

you have

to

do

is

point the card

at

your attacker

and bend

it,

thereby squirting out a stream of stinking liquid.

The card

is

smooth on one

side

and rough on the other to

avoid accidental self-spraying.

Sounds good. Presumably, the police would have trouble tracking the culprit, as the stench

weeks — that

is,

unless said culprit

would

knows enough

little

linger for

to

mix hy-

drogen peroxide with baking soda.

Coming Clean on Laundry Products I

never

new

know what

the mail will bring.

supplement to evaluate or

One

— another day,

cleaning agent to try a

day, a

it

new

magnetic shoe insert to

22o

might be

a

nutritional test for its

UfcOUND

Till

HOUSE

"energy enhancing" potential. But one of the most intriguing items

I

have ever been asked to comment on has been the ap-

parently magical "Laundry Disk,'* which claims to clean clothes without the help of detergent.

Now, I'm

all

for

new

technological developments and

down on my

wouldn't mind cutting

tainly

detergent use for

various environmental reasons, but in this case that

was

I

skeptical

from the

inside the perforated top

must admit

I

had been furnished with

start. I

three colored plastic disks that rattled

tiny,

cer-

I

when

A glimpse

shaken.

and bottom revealed

a

number

of

hard beads. According to the instructions, the disks were

to be placed inside the

perform

The

their

washing machine, where they would

wizardry for

at least five

hundred

loads.

was

"technical" information provided with the product

The

was

most

interesting, to say the least.

made

of "activated ceramics," which "emit far infrared electro-

beads,

I

told,

were

magnetic waves that cause water molecule clusters to separate, allowing

much

smaller individual water molecules to penetrate

into the innermost part of the fabric

and remove

This

dirt."

sounds very impressive, but infrared waves are

just technical

jargon for heat. Agitating the

washing ma-

may

chine

would

create a

yield

process in

is

insignificant.

some way

Another claim ous:

"The

little

this

activates

balls in the

but the amount of heat

this

Furthermore, the idea that

this

little friction,

water molecules

product makes

activated ceramics

is

is

nonsense.

even more preposter-

produce an abundance of hy-

droxyl ions, making water molecules smaller and enhancing their solvent ability." Altering the size of

impossibility.

The product

ing "ionized oxygen that

Wow!

also claims to be capable of kills

is

I

list

an

produc-

bacteria without chemicals."

These Laundry Disks must be amazing. They can

bacteria.

No

water molecules

wonder why we bother with

kill

antibiotics?

of ingredients was included with the product, but

221

I

RADAR, was eventually

HULA HOOPS, AND PLAyHIL able to track

which shed some

Sheet,"

down on

light

PIGS

Data

a "Material Safety

the composition of the Laun-

dry Disks. The only ingredient of interest were "zoolites";

I

had to assume the manufacturers were not referring to animal excreta but

meant

do have the

plexes

would

ability to soften

from the

metallic ions

interfere

These fascinating mineral com-

"zeolites."

solution.

water by removing certain

Calcium and magnesium ions

with the activity of

a detergent,

and for that

reason zeolites are added to commercial detergents, but

hard to imagine

how

in the case of the

Of course,

the

Laundry Disks. issue

is

not whether the effectiveness of

the product can be justified

enlisted

is

they could produce any significant effect

main

whether the product I

it

my wife's

itself

on

actually

theoretical grounds but

works on

dirty laundry, so

We

help with the appropriate experiments.

washed, separately, colored and white laundry using either detergent,

Laundry Disks, or

just plain water.

The

results

came

out in the wash. The detergent worked best; the clothes

washed using the Laundry Disks and the

plain water

were

in-

distinguishable.

Amazingly, the plain water actually did quite a good job

—

people tend to underestimate the ability of water to remove dirt,

this

probably accounts for the glowing comments

satisfied

customers featured in the Laundry Disk bro-

and

from chure.

It is also likely

that small

amounts of detergent

clothes

from previous washes contributes

that the

Laundry Disks

left in

to the perception

are effective cleaners. In general, laun-

dry can be cleaned very effectively with

less

detergent than

manufacturers recommend.

Now

that we've gotten the nonsense out of the way,

examine the gents,

real

anyway? The main

a surfactant,

let's

chemistry of cleaning clothes. What's in deteringredient,

which plays

a dual role,

is

an agent that increases the wetting ability of water

—

222

—

GROUND by allowing

it

to spread

the item being washed. surface

more

HOUSE

freely into the

When

normally forms

it

rill.

bead due to

a

minute crevices of

drop of water

a

applied to a

is

a particular

property of

water

— surface tension. This simply means

at the

surface have a very strong attraction for each other and

do not want

that the molecules

to let go.

The molecules of

a surfactant force themselves

between the

water molecules and reduce the surface tension, allowing the water to "wet" an

phenomenon

is

bedded

grease.

One end

of the molecule has an attraction for

thus anchored to the water,

therein, can be

Surfactants can be inactivated

as well as

the classic bathtub ring.

When

any

dirt

the

im-

water.

by minerals dissolved

in water.

also a surfactant, the interaction

is

leads to the precipitation of soap

do not

it,

removed by flushing with

In the case of soap, which

is

this

upon. The surfactant molecules also help in

grease, while the other has an affinity for water.

grease

it is

that the copywriters for Laundry Disks have

tried to capitalize

removing

more thoroughly. Perhaps

article

The

from solution

— the end

result

surfactants used in detergents

precipitate out of solution, but they

do

lose their effi-

ciency in the presence of dissolved calcium or magnesium. Accordingly, water softeners such as phosphates, aluminosilicates (these are the zeolites), or (also

known

as

washing soda) are added to bind the trouble-

some minerals and allow There

is

good old-fashioned sodium carbonate

more.

If

the surfactant to carry out

its

job.

water gets into the detergent box, the

product will clump together and form

large,

cumbersome

chunks. To ameliorate this problem, sodium sulfate, which has the ability to absorb moisture,

include an

enzyme

is

that breaks

added. Other ingredients

down

may

protein stains, such as

blood, or chemicals that absorb ultraviolet light and convert

it

to visible light for that "whiter than white" effect. Perfumes are

often thrown into the mix, although there

£23

is

less

of a tendency

HULA HOOPS, AND PLAyiUL

RADAR. to

do so these days because of

PIGS

the slim possibility of allergic

reactions.

Detergent manufacturers even maintain our washing machines: they

add sodium

preparations to prevent

silicate to their

corrosion. This substance reacts with metal to form a thin,

water-impervious protective

ensuring that our washing

layer,

we

machines keep functioning so that detergent.

Still, isn't all this

for three ineffective scientific lingo?

made a

great

calming

keep buying more

Laundry Disks and

a lot of

rattles.

Maybe

pseudo-

my disks — they

did eventually find a use for

I

baby

will

better than spending eighty dollars

those "far infrared waves" have

effect.

The Little Mermaid and Optical Brighteners I

always enjoy spending a few days

—

lots of heat, lots of people,

and

at

Disneyworld

have thought that the Adventures of the tion at

mgm

Studios

experience? Imagine

would turn out this.

You

Little

who would

But

lots of fun.

in Florida

Mermaid

attrac-

to be a great chemical

enter a dark, mercifully

air-

conditioned theater built to resemble an underwater cave. Mist fills

the

air,

the tiny water droplets sparkling in shafts of spec-

tacular laser light.

There are audible gasps

underwater seascape, complete with colorful

mermaids, unfolds. Fish swim, octopuses

all

all

cables.

effect

is

an

and

and various is

no sign of

truly magical.

How is

it

done? By exploiting the right chemistry, of course.

Audience excitement

by

The

as

fish, plants,

float,

other fantastical creatures frolic happily. There

hands or support

around

at this attraction is actually

excited molecules onstage.

ability to

Some

substances possess the

absorb light of one type and re-emit

224

produced

it

in a different

\ROUND

Till

HOUSE

form. In scientific terms, the light that ent wavelength

from the

example would be

light that

emitted

is

is

of a differ-

was absorbed.

A

typical

the fluorescence of certain fabrics under the

black light of a disco.

"Black light" ible to the

is

really ultraviolet light

human

and

is

therefore invis-

eye. Fluorescent molecules can convert

ultraviolet light to visible light, thereby giving an object the

appearance of "glowing in the dark." The marvelous Little

Mermaid

stage effect

cent paints and light.

is

produced by using

by bathing

a variety of fluores-

the stage in invisible ultraviolet

The performers and the support structures that create the obscured by substances that do not fluoresce. The

illusion are effect

is

truly spectacular.

Fluorescence

is

employed

in other areas of life as well.

often seen ads that proclaim a certain detergent will

laundry "whiter than white," and, in a sense,

We've

make our

this really

can be

done. Fluorescent materials called optical brighteners are incorporated into the detergent formulation and adhere to fabrics just as

dyes do. They transform the invisible ultraviolet

portion of sunlight into visible

light, creating brightness;

dry that

appear to be brilliantly clean.

Even

quite dirty can

is

still

the packaging of cleaning agents

printed with fluo-

is

rescent dyes to catch the shopper's eye. Just

with

a

package of Cheer under one arm and

under the other for

a

laun-

walk into a

a disco

package of Tide

dramatic display and some good clean

fun.

We can

shed some further light on fluorescence by consider-

ing the omnipresent fluorescent light. Just

how

does

it

work?

Fluorescent tubes contain a small amount of mercury vapor.

The

application of an electrical current causes a stream of elec-

trons to traverse the tube, and these collide with the mercury

atoms, which become energized and consequently emit ultraviolet light.

The

inside of the tube

225

is

coated with a fluorescent

HULA HOOPS, AND PLAYFUL

RADAR,

material, such as calcium chlorophosphate,

PIGS

which converts the

The same

invisible ultraviolet light into visible light.

behind color television pictures. The TV screen

is

idea

coated with

when

tiny dots of substances that fluoresce in different colors

they are excited by the

beam

of electrons that scans the picture.

had

practical applications even before

Fluorescent materials

we dreamed

of color television.

fluorescent materials called fluorescein.

is

One

a synthetic

Under

of the most amazing of

compound

ultraviolet light,

it

Over

a million

pounds of the

and distributed to airmen Since the fluorescence

is

stuff

in-

World War

many downed

for saving the lives of

all

appropriately

produces an

tense yellow-green fluorescence, which, during

was responsible

is

were manufactured

n,

flyers.

in

1943

in little packets to use as sea markers.

so potent that

concentration of fluorescein

is

it

can be seen

as little as

rescue planes easily spotted the

men

when

25 parts per

the

billion,

in the ocean. Extensive

made on aircraft carriers. The signalmen on deck wore clothes and waved flags treated with the compound, which was then made to glow by illumination with ultraviolet light. As the incoming pilots could spot them clearly, the need to use runway lights, which would have drawn the attention of enemy aircraft, was eliminated. use of fluorescein was also

Certain natural substances also fluoresce under ultraviolet light

—

urine, quinine,

Prisoners have been

and moose fur are interesting examples.

known

to exploit this property of urine

by

using their urine as an invisible ink. Tonic water, which contains quinine, will also fluoresce mystically.

moose

fur? Well, in Canada, the us, and

What about

Sweden

the

there are hun-

dreds of accidents each year involving automobiles and moose.

Some

of these collisions result in

facturers are

now

I

sat

Certain car manu-

considering fitting their vehicles with uv-

emitting headlights to reduce the

As

fatalities.

number

watching the fluorescent

2£6

of

moose

collisions.

frolics of the Little

Mer-

GROUND THE HOUSE maid,

I

bygone clever

was reminded of an intriguing

ultraviolet episode of a

some commercial help them identify and

laundries hatched a

In the 1970s,

era.

scheme

would mark

to

the clothing with ink that

sort laundry: they

was

invisible

under

dinary light but that would fluoresce under ultraviolet sort the laundry, fabric

for tags or

and

it

When

lar.

just shine

messy laundry pens.

was. That

is,

It

seemed

until black-light discos

patron was

floor,

I

the

visible

—

like a great

became popu-

laundry numbers fluoresced eerily on his

approached the dance

To

light.

uv lamps on

and the markings would become immediately

no need idea,

workers would

or-

shirt as

he

don't imagine the average club

appreciating the interesting chemistry involved.

The Wrong Chemistry Chemistry has always been associated with the things together. Actually, that's

how

act of

the science got

mixing

its start:

our distant ancestors mixed starch with yeast and made alcohol; they

mixed animal

fat

with

wood

der.

made soap; made gunpow-

ashes and

they mixed sulfur, charcoal, and saltpeter and

These useful commodities whetted

their appetites,

and

they persevered, mixing substances with the hope of producing other handy things.

The

The Egyptian's attempts

results weren't

to cure blindness

ture of pig eyes, antimony, rust, and

honey

always satisfactory.

by pouring

a

mix-

into a sufferer's ear

did not work. Neither did Hippocrates's endeavor to cure baldness with a mixture of opium, horseradish, and pigeon

dung.

Modern chemical experimentation silver, tin,

and mercury to

fill

has

cavities in

how to mix teeth; how to mix and how to com-

shown our

baking powder with flour to make cookies;

bine ethylene glycol with terephthalic acid to

227

us

make

polyester.

HULA HOOPS, AND

RADAR.

We

IM./Wllll. PICS

can even mix nucleotides together to make dna. But, of

some substances

course, we've also learned that there are

that

should never be combined.

A

couple of years ago, a lady complained to a neighbor

about an infestation of mice in her house. The well-meaning neighbor offered

this suggestion:

mix some toilet-bowl cleaner

with bleach in a container and leave the concoction

house overnight;

she neglected to say was that

human

in the

guaranteed to get rid of the mice.

it's

would

it

What

likely get rid of the

inhabitants as well. Permanently.

Chemically speaking, bleach

cium hypochlorite.

highly toxic chlorine gas.

sodium hydrogen liberate chlorine

sulfate,

from

then destroy lung

tissue,

The

acrid

it

cal-

releases

fumes of chlorine can

cause the lungs to

I.

acid,

toilet-bowl cleaners contain

by drowning. The

purpose in World War

same

with any

an acidic substance that will quickly

bleach.

in a sense, cause death

fered the

Most

sodium or

a solution of

is

When mixed

Our

with water, and,

fill

gas

was used

for this

mouse-fearing lady almost suf-

fate as did the

French troops

at

Ypres

at the

hands of the Germans. Luckily, her neighbor looked in to see

how

the experiment

was going and saved her

just as she

was

about to pass out.

Not everyone who lucky.

concocts this mixture turns out to be so

Many who have poured

bleach into a toilet bowl follow-

ing an unsuccessful attempt to cial

remove

stains

with

a

commer-

cleaner have suffered permanent lung damage, and

have even died. bleach

—

No

acid

some

must ever be mixed with chlorine

this includes acidic drain cleaners, rust

even vinegar. Drain cleaners can cause

all

removers, and

kinds of problems.

The most common ones are based on sodium hydroxide, commonly known as lye. They may be sold as solutions or as solid pellets of

sodium hydroxide, but products

that contain concen-

trated sulfuric acid are also available. Individually, either vari-

228

\ROUND

may prove

ery of drain cleaner

never be mixed.

duce

a

people

When these

tried to

cleaner followed heat,

by

effective,

but the two must

chemicals are combined, they pro-

tremendous amount of

who

HOUSI

Till.

heat.

There have been reports of

unclog their drains with one type of

a chaser of the other variety.

which generated steam, which blew the whole corrosive

mixture into their

faces.

Mixing bleach with ammonia, an ingredient

dow

This created

in

many win-

cleaners, can also pose a hazard. Irritating chloramine va-

pors are released. These are not as dangerous as chlorine, but

they are most unpleasant; in

fact,

with chlorine in swimming pools rather chloramines

the smell people associate is

not actually chlorine but

formed by the reaction of chlorine with

urea in the water. Let's not think about urea in the

why

the water contains

first place.

Speaking of swimming pools, disaster

may

strike

if

the

chemicals required to disinfect pool water are not mixed properly.

There are two commonly available chlorinating agents for

the treatment of pool water, both of

dry acid,

crystalline form. In the water,

which

is

which

are usually sold in

both release hypochlorous

the actual disinfecting agent. Calcium hypochlo-

229

RADAR, rite

HULA HOOPS, AND PLAYFUL

PICS

used for short-term protection, and trichloroiso-

is

cyanuronate, also

known

as stabilized chlorine, releases chlorine

over a longer period. These chemicals must be added to the

pool water individually.

bucket and water

is

If

added, an exothermic reaction, which

releases chlorine gas, begins

possibility of an explosion.

these

In

the dry crystals are mixed in a

immediately

The

— there

is

even the

reaction can be so serious that

two substances should not even be stored near each fact,

other.

dry calcium hypochlorite should not be mixed with

any combustible substance because agent. This

is

just a technical

way

it

of saying that

stances to burn. Just ask the scoutmaster his charges

a strong oxidizing

is

who

it

helps sub-

decided to teach

Many

about proper outhouse techniques.

out-

houses are equipped with a bucket of lime, or calcium oxide. Periodically, a

scoop of the

stuff

is

dumped As

into the hole for

luck would have

smell-control and disinfection purposes. it,

when

the scoutmaster

wanted to demonstrate

dure, he discovered the bucket for the

was empty.

main stock of lime and discovered

a

He

this

proce-

searched around

bag labeled "calcium

hypochlorite" in the hut where the swimming-pool supplies

were kept. Remembering that lime was calcium something or other, he filled the bucket with the stuff.

some of the powder down

away

the entire

He

then

the outhouse hole, and as he walked

campground was shaken by an

explosion.

Sewage produces copious amounts of methane highly combustible.

dumped

gas,

When the scoutmaster dumped

which

is

the oxidiz-

ing calcium hypochlorite into the hole, the methane exploded.

He

and

his

cubs learned a valuable lesson that day about the

importance of knowing some basic chemistry. Calcium oxide

and calcium hypochlorite are very different substances. in

When

any doubt, do not mix chemicals. Perhaps Rudyard Kipling

put

it

best about a

hundred years ago:

23o

AROUND

rill.

HOUSE

There are those whose study

And

of smells

is

to attentive schools rehearse

How

something mixed with something

else

Makes something worse.

Zeolites to the Rescue The stench

in

every time

I

my car was

which

Seinfeld episode in tense

body odor

humankind

my

is

Jerry's car

is

could think about

saturated with the in-

no process known

of a parking attendant;

The

on the

it

The

it.

floor of the car, and

juice bottle

and begun to ferment. The

a putrid, yeasty smell.

sign of a

quickly traced

I

had

I

somehow

had rolled under the first

it

to

origin of

different: carrot juice. That's right.

a bottle, placed

forgotten about spilled,

I

able to rid his vehicle of the smell.

problem was

bought

unbelievable. All

got into the infernal contraption was the classic

seat,

problem was

to the spilled juice

this

would

solve the

was even worse. In

fact, it

was inde-

and cleaned up the mess, assuming that problem. Wishful thinking.

The next day scribable. It

up shop

the smell

seemed

as

though the fermenting microbes had and were spewing

in the carpet of the car

ious vapors in industrial amounts: the time had

my

chemical knowledge to use. First

ate.

While baking soda,

as

it is

better

I

tried

to put

sodium bicarbon-

known, has

a fabled abil-

ity to neutralize odors, especially acidic ones, in this case

like trying to bring

vinegar

I

bon. This

fared stuff,

no

down

better.

which

is

an elephant with

Next

I

a slingshot.

it

was

With

brought out the activated

car-

actually charcoal that has been heated

to a high temperature in the absence of oxygen, has an ability to

nox-

their

come

set

draw substances

to

its

231

surface,

and

it is

amazing

commonly

HULA HOOPS, AND PLAYFUL

RADAR,

incorporated into

make

didn't

air

and water

filters

remove

to

PIGS impurities.

It

dent in the stench.

a

My next idea was to mask the smell, but the fetid vapors just seemed to scorn

my

attempts to overpower them with dan-

and an array of

gling car deodorizers

These

air fresheners.

—

own

products simply introduce smells of their

they can

cover the everyday annoying odors, but not the reek from It

was now time

Burn the is

smell! Well, not literally.

"oxidize"

it.

The more appropriate term

Oxidizing agents can rob molecules of the

trons that hold

them

together,

much

too

if

bleaching

up

is

another, we've used.

would do

all

By now,

a strong solution of bleach

field.

I

to the carpet.

elec-

and thus degrade them into

simpler substances. Chlorine bleach

At one time or

hell.

to bring out the heavy chemical equipment.

a great oxidizing agent.

is

seen

how

can shred fabrics

it

didn't even care about

The

smell had to go.

and sponged

it

I

what

mixed

into the battle-

This should have oxidized the smell and killed the

microbes that were responsible for the fermentation, but the only thing

I

got from this endeavor was the disturbing fra-

grance of bleach, which lingered for a few days before replaced to be

by

the original stench.

mocking

taunted.

I

did,

my

chemical expertise. Hit

with ethylene oxide. This

use to sterilize surgical instruments.

It

available as an active ingredient in the

known as uct when

"Air Sponge."

I

racked

hellish

was

me is

with more, they

the stuff hospitals

has recently

become

commercial product

had achieved success with

this

prod-

confronted with several other smell problems, but

the ethylene oxide could not penetrate I

it

The stinky compounds seemed

my

brain.

How

on

my

earth could

car stench. I

break

mixture of organic compounds? Enzymes!

I

down

that

have for

a

long time been counseling people to use enzyme-based products against odors arising

from pet

accidents,

work. These preparations are available

—

232

—

and they do

in pet stores,

and they

GROUND THE HOUSE can eliminate the smell of urine, vomit, and even cat spray.

Enzymes

enzyme army could do

kinds of organic waste; surely the

all

the job. But

By now

no

—

time the army fired blanks.

this

become

the situation had

kids were refusing to get into the car. tation,

seemed to be

at stake. I

was depleted. And then goat:

somewhere,

odor to

down

are biologically active proteins that can break

I

pride,

hands with powdered

who

my

wife and

very repu-

My chemical arsenal

was stymied.

remembered

the story about the billy

I'd read that these animals

their handlers,

My

desperate.

My

impart a terrible

problem by rubbing

solve the

zeolite. Zeolite.

Of

course!

I

their

chastised

myself for not having thought of this sooner. I'd certainly

known about discussed

this material

—

in fact, a

few years

smell-eliminating properties

its

on the

had

earlier

I

radio,

and

I

even had a sample of a zeolite product a distributor had sent

me a

it

up and sprinkled

me leave you in suspense moment while I tell you a little

derives

and It

dug

at the time. I

But

let

it

in the car.

about

zeolites.

"lithos,"

which means "stone": in

ter,

These minerals

which they

structure.

When

boil,"

zeolites are "boiling stones."

1756 that Swedish mineralogist Baron A.F.

Cronstedt noted that certain rocks seem to boil a flame.

for

The name

from the Greek words "zein," which means "to

was way back

with

outcome

as to the final

when

heated

crystallize in the presence of

wa-

retain in the pores or channels in their crystal

heated, the water boils out. Dried zeolites are

permeated with molecular-sized channels into which water can be reabsorbed. In

fact, zeolites are

now

widely used

agents in double- and triple-glazed windows.

And

as antifog

zeolites can

trap a variety of other molecules in their porous internal structures as well.

we have a large variety of natural and synthetic They are all essentially aluminosilicates, meaning

Today, lites.

zeothat

they are composed of aluminum, silicon, and oxygen. These

—

233

—

RADAR,

HULA HOOPS, AND PLAYFUL

PIGS

elements constitute the crystal framework, and their specific

abundance and bonding patterns determine the

relative

Some

the channels that run throughout the crystal.

size of

zeolites, for

example, can preferentially trap nitrogen and can therefore be

used to separate the oxygen and nitrogen components of

Others can exchange sodium ions trapped for calcium

This effect

and magnesium and thus remove these from water.

is

known

as

water softening, and

it

accounts for the

do not work

inclusion of zeolites in detergents. Detergents

well in

hard water — that

By and

air.

in their structures

large, zeolites

friendly phosphates in

is,

water with a high mineral content.

have replaced the environmentally un-

most detergent formulations. The

zeolite

with the right pore size can even remove undesirable com-

pounds such

methyl mercaptan, which can

as

coffee. This objectionable, skunklike smell

is

taint instant

just

seven-hundred-odd compounds in the aroma of

one of the

coffee, but

it

yields to the right zeolite.

So,

if

couldn't

methyl mercaptan could be trapped by

my

a zeolite,

horrendous carrot-juice witch's brew?

why

Well,

it

could: after a couple of powdered-zeolite treatments the stench left

my car.

Life

was worth

living again. Stimulated

cess, I did a little search of the literature to see

unusual things zeolites can do

— and did

I

minds to

many

this

researchers at the Ethyl Corporation discovered that

porating "Zeolite ers' desire to

A"

my suc-

ever find one!

seems that while young roosters are eager to mate a day, older ones slack off. Putting their

by

what other It

times

problem,

by

incor-

into feed they could enhance the roost-

mate!

234

SENSE OR NONSENSE?

Getting a Charge out of Electrical Nonsense The Vermont farmer couldn't hard he thought bear

it

it

sleep.

would jump

His heart was pounding so

right out of his chest.

Unable to

any longer, he got out of bed and went outside to walk

around. In the dark, he stumbled and against the electrified fence he

from wandering

off.

When

had

fell,

landing chest

installed to prevent his

first

cows

he recovered from the shock, the

farmer was delighted to discover that his disturbing palpitations

had ceased. This inventive man then ran an

tension from

the fence into his

whenever necessary. Much related

later,

Upon

it

all,

he saw a physician for an unhis heart condition,

"solved/'

hearing this story, most people, although perhaps sur-

prised that the farmer did not

would

house and treated himself

problem and refused any advice on

claiming he had

electrical ex-

manage

to electrocute himself,

readily accept the validity of his unique "therapy." After

movies and television shows often portray

failing hearts

being restored by a shock delivered to the chest. Defibrillation, as this

process

is

known,

is

actually

one of

a very

few legitimate

techniques whereby a patient can benefit from the application

—

235

—

HULA HOOPS, AND PLAYFUL

RADAR,

PIOS

of an electric current. But scientifically illegitimate electrical

treatments are far

more numerous and

some

give rise to

rather

shocking anecdotes. In the late 1800s, miracle after miracle was presented to the

American

public. Marconi's radio, Bell's telephone,

lightbulb ushered in the

Age

of Electricity.

and Edison's

If this

mysterious

force could send sound through the air and dispel darkness,

could

it

not also

work

began to address

this

magic on the human body?

its

question in earnest, but long before they

could cast any light upon the game.

Scientists

it,

the quacks and charlatans entered

Unencumbered by

the need to play

science, they sparked plenty of interest

by the

rules of

with their unsubstanti-

ated claims and pseudoscientific lingo.

Galvanic Electric Belts were said to cure "nervous and chronic diseases without medicine." Containing primitive batteries consisting of pieces of

copper and zinc separated by

blotting paper, they delivered a mild current to the gullible

wearer,

who would become

convinced that the healing process

was underway. One of the most popular designs featured loops extending

down

restore "lost

to the testicles; such a belt

manhood,"

was intended

"the greatest outrage on Nature's sexual ordinances

can possibly perpetrate"

to

a loss the manufacturer attributed to

— otherwise known

man

as "self-abuse."

Perpetrators of this transgression against nature could be identified

by

the black-and-blue discolorations under their eyes.

Fortunately, they could also be reenergized and dissuaded

from engaging

And was

in

for those

Electric

such activity by the Galvanic Belt.

who were

Liniment or

electricity in a 2

drachm

leery of electrical

equipment there

pills that "contained 50,000 volts of

bottle."

The only charge patients got on the bill from

out of these nonsensical nostrums appeared the quack trical

who

sold

them

the stuff. Surely, the dean of the elec-

quacks was Dr. Albert Abrams,

—

236

—

a traditionally trained

\

S

who

physician

in the early

ORNONSENSI

5

practiced standard medicine, and, for a period

1900s, served as vice president of the California

Medical Society. As he approached middle age, Abrams decided that standard medicine did not really suit him, so, in 1909, he invented his

lotherapy." There

own

specialty,

which he

was no longer any need

or stethoscopes in making a diagnosis that he could identify the

spine resonated

would

when

activate a cure

"spondy-

called

to rely

on symptoms

— Abrams had decided

problem by observing how

a patient's

tapped. After making a diagnosis,

by further drumming on

Abrams

the spine in an

appropriate rhythm.

The widespread introduction for

of electricity

Abrams: now he could put

scientific footing. Diseases,

harmony

was tailor-made

his vibrational ideas

on

a

he proclaimed, are caused by a dis-

of electronic oscillations in the

body and can be

cured by vibrations that have the same frequency as the disease.

He

nose

illness

invented a device he called "the dynamizer" to diag-

by measuring

the electronic vibrations in a drop of

blood. Diagnosis did not even require the presence of the patient,

but

it

did require a healthy surrogate. Just picture this

bizarre scene.

with

a large

A

few drops of the

magnet

to "cleanse"

patient's

them of confusing

and then introduced into the dynamizer. traption

who

was connected

stood on

surrogate's

somehow

a

body

blood were treated vibrations

A wire from this con-

to the forehead of a healthy volunteer

metal plate.

Abrams proceeded

to tap the

systematically until he located an area that

resonated with the vibrational frequencies of the

blood sample. Thus, the diseased organ was identified (and, incidentally, so

was the

patient's religion).

Abrams then used

a

second machine, called an "oscilloclast," which he tuned to the vibrational frequency of the disease in order to cure

it.

Testi-

monials to the brilliance of Abrams's machines were issued and the

money began

to flow in.

237

HULA HOOPS, AND PLAYFUL

RADAR.

Noted

physicist Robert Millikan called the oscilloclast a

device a ten-year-old

The

old.

PIOS

New

boy would build

York Times called spondylotherapy a scheme of

magnificent absurdity.

The American Medical Association pro-

duced posters claiming that Abrams's and then made

existent diseases

disciples diagnosed

a fortune

But the good doctor was undeterred by flourished.

to fool an eight year

When

by

non-

"treating" them.

all this,

and business

Prohibition came along, he introduced a gad-

get that could duplicate the vibrational frequency of alcohol so

drunk without drinking. More

that Abramsites could get

testi-

monials followed. Finally, public skepticism began to kick in after

Abrams diagnosed

general cancer and tuberculosis of the

urogenital tract in a sample of chicken blood.

And

interest re-

waned when Abrams himself contracted pneumonia and

ally

died from the disease his oscilloclast was supposed to cure with ease.

Of

course, quack electrical devices did not die with

in fact, they

him

—

have proliferated lately through the Internet. You

can get yourself a Medicomat, which will treat asthma, arthritis,

an Interro device which will diagnose "imbalbody and recommend homeopathic treatments, q-link Pendant, which will combat "toxic forms of en-

and

hepatitis,

ances" in the

or a

and which consists of

ergy,"

computer chip

wire, and a is

—

a plastic case, a coil of

a bargain at us $129.

Then

there

the Crystaldyne pain reliever, guaranteed to alleviate pain

associated with conditions ranging tion. Well,

I

fifty dollars grill igniter.

come

arthritis to I

menstruagot for

my

of "research funds" was a two-dollar barbecueAll

I

my

in handy:

my

from

had to order one of those. What

just

thing against

on

copper

I

had to do to eliminate pain was to press the skin and push the button.

used

it

The device did

to replace the nonfunctioning igniter

barbecue.

—

238

—

51

NONSE

NSE OK

Illusion, Delusion,

New York City

Living in

not surprising that in called

New

York

N

51

or Solution?

can undoubtedly be

many pharmacies

Stress Tabs.

The

stressful, so

label describes the tab as a

"homeopathic lozenge designed to manage daily lated to sleep,

work, relationships,

hangover, overindul-

The

instructions say that

should be dissolved in the mouth and that the pro-

a lozenge

cess

may

be

very intense place.

be repeated hourly as needed.

What

stresses re-

travel,

gence, and premenstrual syndrome."

a

it is

you'll find a product

New York must indeed

magical ingredients can these lozenges contain that

will so easily take the

edge off a crazy day? The label actually

reveals the presence of aconite

and strychnine

poisons. But not to worry. This

which means

is

— two

classic

homeopathic remedy,

a

that the ingredients are present in vanishingly

small amounts, in fact, they have been diluted to the extent that in

most

cases there isn't even a single molecule of the original

substance

left;

only some sort of "imprint" or "molecular ghost"

remains. I

have a problem with homeopathy.

principles I

I

must

cast aside the

If I

am

to accept

its

understanding of chemistry that

have developed over 30 years. Therapy based on nonexistent

molecules just does not

fit

the model. But, of course,

I

conclude that homeopathy does not work just because

posed mechanism of action scientific view.

After

all, it

is

cannot its

pro-

unacceptable to the current

was once widely believed

that

due

to the curvature of the earth, radio transmission across the

Atlantic

would never be possible because radio waves traveled Then it was accidentally discovered that these

in straight lines.

waves bounce off the atmosphere. However, before we begin altering

our theories about molecules,

whether homeopathy

really

—

does work.

239

—

we

have to investigate

First, a bit of history.

RADAR,

The

father of

He

PIGS

homeopathy, Samuel Hahnemann, was trained

medicine and began practicing

in traditional late 1700s.

HULA HOOPS, AND PLAYFUL

in

Germany

in the

quickly became disillusioned with the treat-

ments he had learned. Bleeding, leeches, suction cups, purges,

and arsenic powders seemed to do more harm than good.

Hahnemann began regimen that

at the

to ignore his training

and to prescribe

time was quite revolutionary: fresh

air,

a

per-

sonal hygiene, exercise, and a nourishing diet. Since there was little

chance of earning a living by simply recommending

this

regimen, he began to supplement his income by making use of his fluency in eight languages: he undertook to translate

medical

texts.

While working on one of these

encountered an explanation of malaria

— the substance

Intrigued, really

had

this effect. It did not,

translations, he

quinine supposedly cured

fortifies the

Hahnemann took some

stomach. quinine himself to see

but soon

if it

Hahnemann began

to

pulse quickened, his extremities became cold,

feel feverish: his

his

why

head throbbed. As these symptoms were exactly

like those

of malaria, he formulated a dramatic conclusion: the reason

quinine cured malaria was that fever cures fever. In other words, like cures like.

Homeopathy, from the Greek "homoios,"

meaning

and "pathos," meaning

"like,"

Hahnemann went

further,

suffering,

was born.

and began systematically to

the effects of a large variety of natural substances

people. Such "provings" led

him

test

on healthy

to conclude that belladonna,

for example, could be used to treat sore throats because

it

caused throat constriction in healthy subjects. But belladonna

Was homeopathy therefore dangerous? Not at all. Hahnemann had another idea. He theorized that his medications would work by the Law of Infinitesimals: the smaller the dose of a given substance, the more effective that

is

a classic poison.

substance would be in stimulating the body's "vital force" to

ward

off disease.

24o

The

NON SE NSE

NSE OK

SI

were extreme. "Active preparations" were

dilutions

made by repeated tenfold dilutions of the original extract. Hahnemann was not bothered by the fact that at these dilunone of the

tions

the

power

original substance remained; he claimed that

of the curative solution did not

come from

the pres-

ence of an active ingredient but from the fact that the original substance had, in

some way, imprinted

other words, the water that

had been dissolved

itself

on

the solution. In

somehow "remembered" in

the material

several dilutions back. This im-

it

printing process had to be carried out very carefully; a simple dilution of the solution

was not enough. The

struck against a special leather pillow a fixed in order to be

had to be

vial

number

of times

"dynamized."

Traditional medicine did not take kindly to these peculiar

In

rites. 1

fact,

the

American Medical Association was formed

846 largely as a reaction to homeopathy; one of

was

goals

to rid the profession of

association's strictures

became

its

homeopaths. At times, the

ridiculous.

One

Connecticut

doctor lost his membership for consulting a homeopath

who happened

in

founding

—

to be his wife.

Nevertheless,

homeopathy did not disappear and

is

now

enjoying a rebirth. People disillusioned with scientific medicine are resorting to in

homeopathy, gleefully pointing to studies

peer-reviewed scientific journals that appear to

homeopathy works. But wait

minute.

a

A

show

that

careful review of

these studies yields unimpressive results. In the treatment of

some minor

more tion;

conditions,

homeopathy does seem but

effective than a placebo, it

merely

attracts

positive results at

tion bias

enough

show

is

academic

all if

there

is

no

studies are carried out,

—

no

practical implica-

How can there be any

active ingredient? Publica-

What

mean by this is that if sooner or later some will have to

a likely explanation.

positive results based

this has

interest.

to be slightly

on

I

the law of averages. Reporting

241

—

RADAR.

HULA HOOPS. ANP PLAYFUL

these while maintaining silence

on negative

PIGS

findings can create

the illusion of effectiveness.

Recently, the largest-ever review of homeopathic studies

was published

When

all

in the leading British medical journal, the Lancet.

the studies were pooled,

have a slight

homeopathy was shown

advantage over placebo. But,

statistical

words of the researchers involved: "We found dence that homeopathy

other words, for

clinical condition/' In

insufficient evi-

any

clearly efficacious for

is

all

to

in the

intents

single

and purposes,

homeopathy does not work. And

this

homeopaths. Clearly, no

study will derail the advocates

of homeopathy.

They

scientific

will

keep buying and

for a host of conditions, buttressed

evidence.

Most people

do not

just

Homeopaths have even touted something that has stymied

that a single year.

there

selling their "cures"

all

kinds of anecdotal

by themselves.

a cure for the

common

scientific researchers. It

duck

liver,

which

is

is

apparently, a

a

cold,

based on

diluted to the extent

duck can supply the world demand for

There may not be is,

by

realize that the majority of

ailments are self-limiting and resolve

freeze-dried extract of

study was carried out by

a

whole

goose that can lay a golden egg, but

duck with

a twenty-million-dollar liver.

Pop Rocks and Exploding Stomachs Marli Brianna Hughes looks only about three years old, but she

is

destined to be a tv

star.

introduced by the Quaker

For Marli, you

company

as the

see,

has just been

new "Mikey" and

will be

widely featured in the company's television ads for Life

cereal.

I

hope she has

a stronger

stomach than the original

Mikey. Let's backtrack a little to 1971, a

commercial that featured

when Quaker came out with

a cute little

242

boy who was

tasting an

SENSE OK NONSENSE

unfamiliar cereal.

Downing

a couple of spoonfuls, his face re-

flected pure delight. After awhile,

course,

it

went

off the

air,

but

when the ad had run its when the stories started.

that's

Mikey, the rumors went, had not peacefully retired from television career: he it

seems, had

down with

And what

had died.

a death.

his

Poor Mikey,

consumed some Pop Rocks and washed them

a chaser of soda.

His

little

stomach, unable to

handle the pressure from the carbon dioxide released by this

combo, had exploded. Could this be? Pop Rocks were introduced to the American market

volatile

1974. This novel

candy was invented by William Mitchell,

research scientist at General Foods, and

it

was described

in a as

"carbonated candy crystals that crackle on the tongue." The

product was an instant the

little

pieces of

hit

with kids,

who

got a real kick out of

candy that would burst

in the

mouth. The

technology behind Pop Rocks was ingenious. Mitchell had

found

a

way

to infuse a melt of sugar, lactose,

and corn syrup

with carbon dioxide and to retain the gas in the mixture

had hardened. The sweet ingredients ors

were dissolved

in a little

as well as flavors

after

it

and col-

water and heated to about 150

degrees Celsius. Application of a

243

vacuum reduced

the water

RAOAR, IIULA HOOPS,

AND PLAYFUL

was then pumped

content, and carbon dioxide

PIGS

under high

in

pressure.

While the pressure was maintained candy was allowed to cool to

in the closed vessel, the

a glassy solid. Releasing the pres-

sure then allowed most of the carbon dioxide to escape, a

process that cracked the hardened mass into small rocklike

Some

pieces.

of the carbon dioxide, however, was retained in

the bubbles that had

on

the

little

formed

as the

candy

solidified.

"rocks" resulted in audible pops

Sucking

as this gas

was

liberated.

But

is

candy?

this truly a killer

Pop Rocks

contains

Of

soda pop. In a worst-case scenario, ated soft drink, the candy spite of

on

its

if

a

a life of

its

swallow of

coupled with a carbon-

may produce

a

burp or two. Yet

absurdity, the story about the death of

that

it

had to send out

in

Mikey took

own. General Foods received so many

from worried parents fifty

course not: a handful of

no more carbon dioxide than

letters to

inquiries

more than

thousand school principals explaining that Pop Rocks was

an entirely safe product. Even full-page ads in 45 major newspapers and a lecture tour by Mitchell, the inventor, could not alleviate

consumer

fears. Eventually, the

the towel and stopped producing

company threw

in

Pop Rocks. Ignorance had

triumphed, and the story of Mikey and his exploding stomach faded away.

Then, a few years ago, a story appeared in several newspapers about another exploding stomach.

thought

the reader's attention.

Still, I

silly scare story, I

decided to check

focused on an unfortunate gentleman large

A

— another irresponsible press report designed to grab

Mexican meal before going to

middle of the night with thought, a

little

cess acid in his

his

it

out.

The

story

who had consumed a bed. He awoke in the

stomach on

fire.

Surely, he

sodium bicarbonate would neutralize the

ex-

stomach and quell those flames. Dissolving 244

a

OR NONSE NSE

SENSI spoonful of baking soda glass of water,

(as

bicarbonate

is

known)

better

in a

he quickly drank the mixture down, but instead

of experiencing relief he began to suffer severe abdominal pain.

The pain became so The diagnosis was

excruciating that he sought medical help.

stomach and emergency surgery

a ruptured

ensued.

me

This struck

who

as a little far-fetched.

embarking on

are just

Even those students

their chemistry studies

know

that

when baking soda reacts with an acid, carbon dioxide is released many a science-fair project is based on creating a

—

"volcano" by combining baking soda with an acid such egar. It

should therefore come

chloric acid in the

surprise that the hydro-

stomach can combine with baking soda to

release gas, but can

Wouldn't the gas

no

as

as vin-

just

it

enough

release

to burst the stomach?

be released as a burp? Hoping to explode

another goofy science story,

decided to telephone the victim,

I

whose name had been mentioned in the story. Instead of interviewing some crank, as I had expected, I found myself talking to the editor of National his

misfortune had, in

sure, his

was

fact,

when he took

I

learned that

been accurately reported. To be

a very rare case.

him

plained to

Geographic magazine.

His doctors had afterwards ex-

that because his

stomach had been very

full

the bicarbonate, the expanding gas had pushed

the contents around, blocking both the

upward and downward

openings to the stomach. The building pressure had ruptured the stomach wall; several operations were required to correct the damage.

Although realize that

this story

is

well documented,

important to

stomachs very rarely explode. In the case of the

Mexican-food-loving

editor, there

may

preexisting medical condition that had

Nevertheless,

soda on a

it is

full

it

seems that

it is

weakened

some

the stomach.

not a good idea to take baking

stomach, especially

—

well have been

£45

when

—

a

number

of antacids

HULA HOOPS. ANO PLAYFUL

RADAR.

— such

as

aluminum or magnesium hydroxide

produce carbon dioxide are So,

if

the latter story

is

manufactured by

could the Mikey story be cred-

true,

actually reappeared, this time

company.

a Spanish

bought some. They

I

produced an interesting tingling sensation that

was

it

— not even

a burp.

do any damage. Mikey was

we now we

Rocks. Anyway,

— that do not

available.

Pop Rocks have

ible after all?

PICS

Way

too

my

in

little

mouth, but

carbon dioxide to

done

definitely not

in

have the ultimate proof.

by Pop

Who

in-

troduced to the public Marli Brianna Hughes, chosen from

new symbol

over 35,000 entrants, as the

other than John Gilchrist, the original Mikey, very

but probably sick of stomaching

all

None much alive

for Life cereal?

the silly rumors about his

untimely demise.

Stranger than Fiction One is

of the most fascinating aspects of science

is

that

unpredictable. In fact, just about the only thing

dict

with

accuracy

scientific

come Madonna

is

true. I

that

will reveal she

Dolly Parton's

left

is

breast will

we

course

can pre-

that the predictions of psychics

would venture

will not

its

to say recent predictions

Jim Nabors's love child or explode on a tv special or

that that

President Clinton will admit he's an alien will not pan out.

Granted, such predictions are amusing to contemplate, but

why look to goes, truth

such

is

tion? Yes, there

As we're

silly stuff for

amusement when,

as the

saying

even stranger, and often more amusing, than is

fic-

levity in science.

talking about levity,

lighter-than-air gas.

Most people

let's

start

associate

it

with hydrogen,

a

with the Hinden-

burg explosion or the Challenger tragedy, but would you believe that in Japan they

brew £46

a beer replacing

some of

the

SEN SI OR NONSENSE carbon dioxide with hydrogen gas? The manufacturer has offered consumers a lame excuse about reducing the greenhouse effect

by curbing carbon-dioxide emissions, but the

Suiso beer

is

made

this

way

is

that

an unusually high-pitched voice ferent frequency in an

it

real

reason

temporarily gives guzzlers

— vocal cords vibrate

at a dif-

atmosphere of exhaled hydrogen

The Donald Duck-like tones well in karaoke bars, but

gas.

the beer produces go over very

what goes over even

better

is

spectacular fireworks display Suiso drinkers can create igniting their

own

the

by

hydrogenated breath. This has led to a rather

dangerous form of entertainment in which participants vie to

who can breathe the most fire. One Toshira Otama liked to impress

see

onlookers by downing

amounts of hydrogen.

15 beers and belching huge

He was

reportedly able to catapult balls of flame across the bar, to the intense admiration of everyone except the bouncer. This gentle-

man

declared Mr. Otama's dragon act too dangerous after he'd

singed the hair and eyebrows of a patron; the bouncer attempted

Otama

to curb the activity. In the scuffle that followed,

lowed

his cigarette

terrible

and ignited the hydrogen

gas.

He

swal-

suffered

burns to his esophagus, sinuses, and larynx. Since his

vocal cords were charred,

Otama was

unavailable for

ment, but one suspects he will be looking for

com-

precarious

less

forms of entertainment in the future.

Otama's exploits may be astounding, but they pale comparison to those of Balaram Sharan, instructor.

Sharan stunned a gathering

a

New

at a press

in

Delhi yoga

club

by suck-

ing 150 milliliters of oil into his bladder through his penis and

then discharging

it

into an oil lamp.

He

proceeded to

lamp, proving that the emission was indeed

Sharan

is

not

a professional

undoubtedly has in the health field.

a certain

is

light the

oil.

While

performer, his demonstration

entertainment value.

His theory

still

that

247

if

He

is

actually

everyone could perform

RADAR. this stunt, the

HULA HOOPS. AND PLAYFUL

world would be

starts in the bladder.

about learning not told us

if

this

free of disease because disease

how one would go

I'm not quite sure

extraordinary

the oil lavage also

PIGS

skill;

furthermore, Sharan has

works

for

women, who would

appear to have an even greater plumbing challenge to over-

come.

The

insightful Sharan has, however,

liness of the

bowel

be said that

this

stration,

is

yogi

of equal importance. is

clear that clean-

it

And

don't ever

not multitalented. After his

he sucked three

bowel through

made

liters

oil

let it

demon-

of water from a bucket into his

rubber tube and then amazed everyone by

a

spewing the water from

his

mouth. Presumably,

out his bowel and made him healthier.

I

think

I

this cleaned

would

rather

eat bran.

Sharan performed his incredible leger-de-rectum totally

naked

— shame did not disrupt

his

performance. This makes

sense in light of a study carried out recently at the University of Michigan in which volunteers were asked to write a

exam

clad only in swimsuits.

They worked

math

in private cubicles

equipped with a desk and a mirror. Fully clothed

women

did

much better than the swimsuited ones, but men scored higher when scantily clad. It seems that the women were so concerned about

how

affected.

not

they looked that their mental performance was

Why

the

men

clear; neither is

it

did better without their clothes on

clear

why anyone would

is

undertake such

research. I

guess

it's

just plain old curiosity.

doesn't always take

you go nowhere. interesting.

you somewhere

Scientists will

The

fuel of science. It

significant,

study anything,

Like coital frequency and health.

A

but without as

long as

it

it is

ten-year-long

epidemiological study conducted in a Welsh village showed clearly that

who were

men who

have the most sex

active at least twice a

live the longest:

week had longer and

248

those

healthier

SI

NO N SEN SI

OR

NSI

than once-a-month performers. Amazingly, there was a

lives

dose-response relationship, with good health being directly linked to frequency of intercourse.

These healthy Welshmen, though, may have had an unhealthy effect on their neighbors. Researchers at the University of Cardiff, also in Wales, studied the effect of noisy love-

making on neighbors. Basing

their conclusions

interviews, they claimed that people

moaning and groaning test subjects said

were more

on numerous

irritated

than, say, a loud stereo.

The

by the

irritated

they were stressed because they thought that

complaining about coital noise pollution was inappropriate.

They were

particularly disturbed

cluded the words "yes, yes, yes!"

There may, however, be

when I

kid

the sound effects in-

you

not.

a solution to the anxiety created

by

the overzealousness of others: the rocking chair. Researchers at the University of Rochester demonstrated that rocking reduces

anxiety and eases depression. for 80 minutes a day, 10 that

Of

1

showed

8 elderly patients

striking

measure anxiety and depression.

who

rocked

improvement on

A rocking chair,

I

tests

suspect,

would therefore have come in handy for the New Zealand woman who was talking to a friend when all of a sudden she heard a chicken squawking in the kitchen. This disturbed

knew

because the only chicken she

one she had

just

popped

of in the vicinity

into the oven. Indeed, that

is

her,

was the exactly

where the sound was coming from. With visions of chicken ghosts dancing in her head, she threw open the oven door and

removed the noisy were

still

them

to vibrate.

intact,

bird. It

seems the vocal cords in

its

neck

and steam coming from the stuffing caused

Anxiety-producing

stuff, to

be sure, but not as unsettling as

the experience of a shopper in an Arkansas supermarket parking

lot.

A passerby noticed the lady sitting in her car, clutching

her head, not moving. She tapped on the

—

249

—

window and

asked

if

RADAR.

HULA

1

GO PS, AND PLAYFUL

1

PIGS

anything was wrong. The answer she received was shocking:

been shot

"I've

in the head,

and I'm holding

my

brains in."

Paramedics were summoned, and they discovered that the lady

was clutching

a

lump of bread dough

to the back of her head.

Apparently she had purchased some canned dough, which had exploded in the hot fied

shopper had

car,

felt a

making

a

wad

dough

of

sound

like a shot.

The

horri-

clinging to the back of

her head, and became convinced that her brains had been

blown

out.

Now,

me, could any psychic have predicted these strange-

tell

Of

but-true happenings?

manage at

course not. Psychics didn't even

to predict the success of Viagra.

making

predictions:

and

will introduce

new

ments eventually

someone

oxygenated lettuce juice

But

die.

who

take a shot

marketing

as a cure-all;

take vitamin supple-

could be wrong. After

I

said that as far as

enough for anyone.

me

rage; a multilevel

study will show that people

a

let

think the radish, chicken-foot, and

I

banana-peel diet will be the

company

But

all,

in 1981

computers go, 640K should be

Who made

this

pronouncement? None

other than Bill Gates.

Colorful Nonsense When

I

was young and had

always wrap a scarf around ing,

but

I

don't think

be because

it

it

a sore throat,

my neck.

It felt

my

mother would

warm and

comfort-

had much therapeutic value. That may

was the wrong color

—

at least, that's

what the

purveyors of the Healing Scarf would undoubtedly suggest. This

latest

medical miracle caught

Internet because of crease

made

its

my

eye as

your sense of well-being." Granted, of Chinese

silk, it

I

perused the

claim to "balance your energies and init is

features the colors of the

—

25o

—

a pretty scarf:

rainbow and

is

N S E OK N O N S X

SI

"designed to bring

1

I

>

!.

healing colors into your consciousness."

all

Healing with color? Where did they get

I'm glad

to find out.

down

me

led

did, for the

I

this idea?

winding path

decided

I

this

took

one of the most fascinating characters

to

history of scientific quackery. Let

me

tell

me

in the

you about Dinshah

P.

Ghadiali and his Spectro-Chrome. Dinshah, as he liked to be called,

was born

he was of

a

in India in 1873.

He

remarkable man.

two and

a half;

by

eight he

At

least

by

began school

was

own

his

at

the ripe old age

in high school,

and by eleven

he was an assistant to a professor of mathematics college. In his writings,

medicine

at the

Dinshah claims

age of 14, but then

prodigy's progress in this area

need to continue

this futile

we

account,

at a

Bombay

that he began to study

hear no more about the

— probably because he saw no

undertaking once he had indepen-

dently discovered the key to health. Color therapy.

Dinshah made dying of

colitis

this

discovery

by exposing her

an indigo-colored patient milk that

filter.

when he cured

to light

The therapy

had been placed

from

a

lamp

in a bottle of the

and Dinshah's career had been launched.

By

—

the time he traveled to

albeit a bizarre

Every element, he

one

girl

with

same color

girl

was well Electro-

his treatment tech-

America

— to go with

said, exhibits a

fitted

He opened

Medical Hall, and there he began to refine

theory

young

also involved giving the

and exposed to sunlight. Within three days, the

niques.

a

in 1911,

he had a

his colored lights.

preponderance of one of the

seven prismatic colors.

Oxygen, hydrogen, nitrogen, and

bon, the elements that

make up 97 percent

car-

of the body, are

associated with blue, red, green, and yellow. In a healthy per-

son these colors are balanced, but they disease strikes.

The therapy

is

To enact

out of balance

simple: to cure a disease,

ister the colors that are lacking

become too

fall

when

admin-

or reduce the colors that have

brilliant.

this therapy,

Dinshah developed the Spectro251

HULA HOOPS, AND PLAVfUL

RAOAR. Chrome, be

fitted

a

box with

it

and an opening that could

filters.

This he sold accompanied

a lightbulb in

with various colored

by the Spectro-Chrome Therapeutic System tailed the appropriate colors to shine

a given patient.

Any

while scarlet was a genital stimulant. insisted

— save

He

color therapy.

was

on

which de-

guide,

Green

example, was a pituitary stimulant and germicide,

light, for

Dinshah

PIGS

disease or condition,

bones — was

broken

also maintained that the

especially suited for use

by

amenable to

Spectro-Chrome

intelligent people, because

"drugs quickly upset the nervo-vital balance of persons of high

A pretty clever ploy — the

mental and spiritual development." gullible, thinking

At

the time,

themselves to be intelligent, ate

many

up.

it

people found his arguments about the

benefits of color therapy to be quite convincing. After

all,

knew

light to

that

premature babies were treated with blue

they

cure them of jaundice, that sunlight was needed for the syntheof vitamin

sis

D

in the body,

quired light for growth.

shown

that elements,

Add

when

and that plants absolutely

to this the fact that chemists

re-

had

heated, emitted different colors of

light,

and Dinshah's preposterous notions started to make

sense.

His slogan,

also sat well

"No

Diagnosis,

No

Drugs,

No

Surgery,"

with a public largely unsatisfied with available

medical care. The idea of a noninvasive therapy and the promof a cure for virtually any ailment were very appealing.

ise

Of

course,

it

wasn't long before Dinshah ran into trouble

He was labeled a fraud and a charlatan by the American Medical Association but managed to portray himself cunningly as a humanitarian who was being persecuted

with the establishment.

by moneygrubbing,

ineffectual, jealous physicians.

himself legally, Dinshah came up with

He

some

To

protect

incredible lingo.

didn't talk of "cures," he spoke of "normalating" the body.

Instead of "treating" patients, he

would

"restore their Radio-

Active and Radio-Emanative Equilibrium." This he would do

—

252

—

OR NONSENSE

SENS]

with his light exposures, or "tonations." Tonations would be carried out with the patient lying with his head to the north, so as to align the earth's

and the body's magnetic

also designed Spirometer

Rods

fields.

Dinshah

measure the pressure

to

ence between the two nostrils and thus to determine

differ-

at

what

time of day tonations should be carried out with the aim of taking full advantage of the body's natural tides. Special ther-

mometers applied

to the bare skin

above the organs would

determine whether a condition was acute or chronic and what kind of light therapy was needed. a

more convoluted and

irrational

It

would be hard

to imagine

form of therapy.

In 1931, Dinshah had run-in with the law over the Spectro-

Chrome.

It

wasn't his

first legal

skirmish

had been arrested for transporting tary, across state lines for

jail.

But

now

six years earlier,

he

a 19-year-old girl, his secre-

immoral purposes. (Perhaps he had

been overexposing himself to in

—

scarlet light.)

He spent four years

he was arraigned on second-degree grand-

larceny charges after a former student complained to officials that the

Spectro-Chrome did not perform

as

promised. In

defending himself, Dinshah trotted out numerous satisfied patients, including a

— incredibly — several physicians. In

fact,

surgeon, Kate Baldwin, claimed that she had successfully

treated glaucoma, tuberculosis, cancer, syphilis,

rious burn case with Dinshah's device.

and

a

very se-

The government had

experts testifying that the Spectro-Chrome

was merely an

or-

dinary lamp and that any successes were due to the placebo effect.

Ultimately, the prosecution could not prove the intent

to defraud, to selling

and Dinshah was found not

guilty.

He went

more Spectro-Chromes, now claiming

been vindicated by

that he

back

had

a court of law.

After the passage of the

Food and Drug Act

of 1938, which

gave the fda some teeth in regulating therapeutic devices, the

government again began

to assemble evidence against Dinshah.

253

HULA HOOPS, AND PLAYFUL

RADAR.

Finally, in 1945, he

was charged with introducing

article into interstate

code.

Once

commerce,

PIGS

a

misbranded

a violation of the criminal

again, he trotted out his satisfied patients, but this

time there were no supporting physicians. His fate was virtually sealed

seizures, a witness tising as

when

had

whom

how

Dinshah had "cured" of

stand.

The prosecution

called

in his adver-

the master urged her.

Another witness de-

he had contacted Dinshah after his diabetic father a

coma and was simply

told to shine a yellow

He did, until his father died. And, finally, how the celebrated burn victim described as

on him.

court heard

recipient of a miracle cure

had, in fact,

succumbed

by Dr. Baldwin

the

the

in the previous trial

to her injuries.

Dinshah was heavily seized, his

whom

on the witness

Dinshah had repeatedly profiled

when

had lapsed into light

a star witness,

fit

having been cured of paralysis; she could not take a

single step

scribed

a

fined, his

books and lamps were

and he was put on five-year probation. The day

probation ended, he was

at

it

again. This time, he

after

founded

the Visible Spectrum Research Institute and sold lamps labeled as

having "no curative or therapeutic value."

He

strenuously

implied in his literature that this was only a means of keeping the fda dogs

away

—

just meaningless legalese that

David had

to resort to in his eternal battle with Goliath. In 1958, the gov-

ernment obtained

a

permanent injunction against shipping

Spectro-Chromes across kept selling the things in his sons

state lines,

but the persistent Dinshah

New Jersey.

After his death in 1966,

took over and managed to have the Dinshah Health

Society of Malaga registered as a nonprofit, scientific, educational,

tax-exempt organization. The society

still sells all

kinds

of light-therapy books, including a history of the Spectro-

Chrome by Dinshah himself in seven cloth-bound volumes You can also buy instructions for building an

priced at $220.

inexpensive Spectro-Chrome from a lightbulb, cardboard, and

254

OR NONSENSE

NSI

5

colored plastic sheets. Apparently, the society does not

sell

the

company on the Internet does Color Light Therapy Lamps "as recommended by

finished product, but another advertise

Dinshah." These look suspiciously colored It

with

like theater spotlights

gels.

seems that today ignorance about the nature of

about disease processes, and about

how

the

light,

body functions

still

abounds; the gullible continue to be victimized. The colorful

Dinshah may have

lived in

what we look upon

times, but his pseudoscientific ideas I

don't

Scarf,

know whether

but

I

suspect

scarf though,

works —

it

I

it

my

smacked of the Dark Ages.

he would have approved of the Healing

would have been

must admit,

keeps

enlightened

as

is

right

so nice that

up

his alley.

The

bought one.

I

It

neck warm.

"Where's the Aura?" Asks Emily Rosa Rarely does a report published in the Journal of the American

Medical Association generate titled

"A Close Look

rarely

is

at

as

much

publicity as did one en-

Therapeutic Touch." Then again,

the author of a paper appearing in one of the world's

leading scientific publications an 11 -year-old a

girl;

and rarely

grade-four science-fair project the subject of

article.

How

is

a research

did this article get into the prestigious journal?

The same way any other

scientific report does:

it

held up to the

scrutiny of expert reviewers.

The author mother,

a

of the piece

was Emily Rosa. With help from her

nurse, she wrote

a description of

designed and conducted a simple experiment to

how

she had

test the

claim

of therapeutic touch (rr) practitioners that they are able to detect the "energy aura" that surrounds a practitioners insist that

they can

255

feel the

human energy

body. These field

when

HULA HOOPS AND PLAyiUL

RADAR. they

move

hands above

their

even reconfigure

it

a patient's

TIGS

body and

that they can

to correct "imbalances." Conditions they

claim to be able to ameliorate range from arthritis to Alzheimer's disease.

Emily

tested 21 practitioners in a straightforward manner.

She concealed herself behind a screen and asked the practitioner she was testing to put both hands through the screen. She

then hovered her a distance the

own hand above one

tt practitioners had

ideal for sensing the

energy

field.

of her subject's hands at

all

previously agreed was

All the subject had to

do was

The

results

report which hand was sensing Emily's presence.

were no better than those that would have been obtained from

random choice

Not

alone.

surprisingly, Emily's report sent the

proponents of

therapeutic touch into mental gyrations. Dolores Krieger, a

New

professor of nursing at

York University who had pio-

neered tt in 1973, came out with guns blazing: the study was invalid, she said, because

one doesn't

perform tt, and, furthermore, the

moving

all

just

go into

healer's

the time to detect the "aura." But

didn't acknowledge

that the

is

a

room and

hands have to be

what Krieger

tt practitioners Emily tested

had agreed before the experiment that the conditions were ceptable and that they

would

ac-

be able to feel the field generated

by Emily's hand. Professor Krieger 's objections are understandable, given that she has parlayed therapeutic touch into a

There are close to America, and tt

is

fifty

huge business.

thousand tt practitioners

taught in

many

in

hire these therapists at rates of seventy dollars an

hour to

ance energy fields around patients. Krieger claims this justified

is

bal-

well

and points to the "hundreds" of supporting studies

the scientific literature. ies,

North

universities. Hospitals often

however,

I

When

I

actually

could see that they

—

256

fall far

—

in

examined these studshort of proof.

Most

SEN SI of

them can be

far

OR

more

NO N SEN SI

readily criticized than

Emily Rosa's

science-fair project.

While Emily's study showed that tt does not work the way its

proponents claim,

There

is

no doubt

certainly did not invalidate the practice.

it

that

many people

find relief

when

believe that their energy fields are being manipulated.

patient feels better, the If

be

therapeutic touch

why becomes

they

When

a

of secondary importance.

works through the placebo

effect,

then so

it.

Dolores Krieger, of course, believes that there than the power of suggestion. She subject in 1971

when

she was a

first

became

member

is

more

to

tt

interested in the

of a research team

created to study the healing abilities of the remarkable

Oskar

Estabany, a former Hungarian cavalry colonel. Estabany claimed that he could heal horses and people just by the laying

on of hands. There were enough

prompt sity.

a study,

testimonials

conducted by Bernard Grad

at

by

the 1960s to

McGill Univer-

This study appeared to establish that the healer could con-

trol the rate at

which

goiters

grew

in rats deprived of iodine

by

placing his hands around their cage for 15 minutes twice a day. In the 1971 study Krieger took part

be able to affect patients'

enough

to sell her

on

Estabany appeared to

in,

hemoglobin

levels. All

the idea of healing

of this was

by hand motion, and

she soon discovered that she could unblock patients' congested

energy (even though

known

this

phenomenon

device) and infuse

is

unmeasurable by any

them with her own. To her

credit,

Krieger only works with medical doctors and claims only to be able to effect relaxation and pain relief: she does not talk of

miracle cures.

Krieger was obviously not the

first

body comes equipped with some governs health. Indeed, in

what we today

this

is

to suggest that the

human

sort of spiritual energy that

one of the most ancient concepts

call alternative

257

medicine.

The Chinese have

RADAR.

HULA HOOPS, AND PLAYFUL

long believed in the mysterious

nounced

"chi"),

which

and which, when

it

travels

life

PICS

force called "qi" (pro-

through the body's "meridians"

becomes imbalanced,

triggers disease.

Cor-

rection of this imbalance through acupuncture, patterned breathing, or diet affords

relief.

The age-old upon similar

practice of

Ayur-

is built ideas. The human made of energy body is seen to be up elements called "doshas," which operate through body channels; the proper flow of these

vedic medicine in India

elements

critical to

is

good

health. Neither of these belief sys-

tems has any basis in anatomy, and they arose because

in

China

and India dissections were forbidden, leaving the physical workings of the body shrouded

in mystery. Healing, therefore,

had to be based on metaphysical

These

beliefs

have withstood the

test of time.

to a combination of the

that

many

beliefs.

have often proven to be quite potent, and they

power

Their success

is

probably due

of the imagination and the fact

illnesses are self-limiting or

psychosomatic; any

other explanation would force scientists to swallow pretty hard.

How,

if

not for the power of suggestion, could

we

ex-

George Chapman, an uneducated

plain the healing abilities of

Englishman with no medical knowledge? Chapman claimed to have been contacted by the taught

him

a patient

spirit

to go into a trance

of a diseased physician

and operate on the

using invisible surgical instruments.

Chapman's

who

body

Not only

of

did

patients eagerly give testimonials to his proficiency,

but they also maintained that they had scalpel

spirit

and the drawing together of the

felt

the twinge of the

spiritual flesh after the

"operation."

Wilhelm Reich,

a

psychoanalyst

who

trained under Freud,

did not look to spirits to learn about the body's health-governing energies: he looked to outer space. Reich believed that he

was the product of

woman, and

a relationship

that his unusual

between an

alien

and an earth

background permitted him to 258

see

OR

NS

5

NONS

NS

not only the body but also the universe energy." plained

He

the ultimate expression of this

is

Reich believed,

is

due

remedy by placing box about the electrical

as

governed by "orgone

derived the term from "orgasm," which he ex-

form of energy.

the patient in an "orgone accumulator," a

size of a

phone booth with no mechanical or

components. The testimonials poured

But not

all

Illness,

which he could

to a deficiency of orgone,

orgone

is

in.

good: Reich warned that some ufos are

propelled by orgone motors (one wonders what the aliens are

doing inside those ufos

— and for how long —

in order to

generate the necessary orgone), and that Deadly

Energy accumulates

in the

Reich obligingly made

Orgone

atmosphere causing disease on

a device called a

earth.

Deadly Orgone Buster

available to help rid us of this scourge.

Believe

them

sells

it

or not, orgone promoters are

an orgone generator for the

still

with

home

us.

that

One is

of

even

capable of remote energizing as long as the patient carries a "transfer disk" in a pocket. This Internet advertiser offers

proof of the device's

efficacy: just

download

gram" and hold your hand three inches above

warmth or a no orgone. The only thing

a sensation of

—

cool, gentle breeze. I felt

259

was

silly.

a "transfer diait

I

to experience tried

it.

I

felt

THE BOTTOM LINE

Great Moments

in

Urine History

These days, urine doesn't often make news. Every once awhile we'll hear athlete

was using

how

how a drunk in New York electroon the subway tracks. We may give

steroids or

cuted himself by urinating

some thought

to urine

dog's urine attracts

all

if

the cat sprays the carpet or a female

the male dogs in the neighborhood. In

days gone by, however, there have been several occasions urine could well have

One day

in

urine analysis was used to prove an

made

in 1669, the

when

headlines.

Hamburg

Daily might have led off

with the banner "Local Alchemist Invents Cold Fire." Hennig Brandt, like other alchemists of his time, was driven by the desire to

make gold and

to discover the secret of

life.

The two

were not unrelated. Gold was considered the eternal metal; does not corrode or tarnish.

If

could be discovered, perhaps

it

and make them immortal secret in urine.

Perhaps

as well.

its

the secret of

its

it

immortality

could be applied to humans

Brandt searched for

yellow color

actually

is

this

dual

due to the

presence of gold, he theorized, and he began to look for meth-

ods of extracting the precious substance. urine derives from blood, and that blood

261

He is

also

knew

essential to

that

life. It

RADAR.

HULA HOOPS. AND PLAyiUL

some of

therefore seemed reasonable to think that giving properties of blood

may

lected a large quantity of urine

by boiling

He At

it

down and

watched

first,

PICS the

life-

be found in urine. Brandt col-

and attempted to concentrate

it

then distilling the vapors.

in great anticipation as the

vapors condensed.

he must have been sorely disappointed, because no

gold formed. This letdown was undoubtedly followed by elation as the

began to glow could is

it

waxy white

substance that

eerily in the

dark

be the much-sought-after

no longer with

us,

glowing substance did confer

as the discoverer of the

did it

now

coated his flask

certainly wasn't gold, but

it

"elixir of life"? Since

immortality on the

a certain

Hennig Brandt

will forever be

glow

just

known

element phosphorous.

didn't take Brandt long to realize that this

more than

Hennig

obviously wasn't, but the strangely

it

inquisitive alchemist, for

It

—

in the dark.

When

new

substance

the paste dried out,

burst into flame. Furthermore, the substance could be stored

safely sary.

under water and used to produce

This was indeed a

time the only tried to secret,

way

momentous

fire

discovery, because at the

was with

to start a fire

whenever neces-

a flintstone.

Brandt

keep his method of preparing the exciting substance

and he even managed to

selling the

method

to a

capitalize

on

his discovery

a

by

few people. By 1737, however, the

French government had studied the process and published

a

on it. Brandt's secret was out. The chemistry turned out to be relatively simple. Urine is a solution of body wastes, and among these are found a variety report

of phosphates, inorganic

bound

to oxygen.

When

compounds

in

which phosphorous

is

phosphates are heated in the presence

of carbon, this element strips the phosphates of oxygen, forming carbon

monoxide and leaving behind elemental phospho-

rous. Brandt formed the required carbon by heating urine to a

high temperature, and this process converted the organic com-

262

THL BO

INE

'

ponents ol the urine to charcoal, which This

is

is

essentially carbon.

not unlike the conversion of wood, through burning, to

charcoal.

By

the end of the eighteenth century, phosphorous had been

put to use. The

first

match had even been developed.

It

was

a

rather simple device, consisting of a piece of paper tipped with

phosphorous and sealed

When

in a glass tube.

the tube

was

broken, the phosphorous would come into contact with the

and

ignite.

Soon there were improvements.

air

became possible

It

to purchase a sulfur-tipped splint paired with a small bottle of

phosphorous; when the splint was dipped into the

phosphorous would

ignite, lighting the sulfur,

bottle, the

which would

in

turn light the paper. It

then didn't take long for the "strike anywhere" match to

made by

be developed. This was

taking a

wood

splinter; coat-

ing the tip with phosphorous, sulfur, and potassium chlorate;

and dipping

was rubbed

it

off

phorous would release of

match

in glue.

on an

The

glue prevented air contact until

ignite.

This reaction would be enhanced by the

more oxygen from

until a temperature

sulfur. This, in turn,

it

which point the phos-

abrasive surface, at

the potassium chlorate

was reached

would cause

the

sufficient to ignite the

wooden

the

on

splint to burst

into flame.

wooden

If a

phosphorus,

made

splint could be

why

knows no bounds,

to burst into flame with

not a person? After especially

when

it

all,

man's ingenuity

comes

to creating novel

methods of warfare. Soon phosphorous-containing

bombs

appeared. These

the tiny pieces of flesh.

would

rain fire

phosphorous

When phosphorous

down on

igniting clothing

burns,

it

shells

and

the enemy,

and burning

combines with oxygen to

form phosphorous oxide, which appears

in the air as a

dense

white smoke. This property of phosphorous was exploited the creation of "smokescreen"

bombs.

£63

in

RAOAR,

HULA HOOPS, AND PLAYFUL

But where was to

come from?

By

trial scale.

all

PIGS

the phosphorous required for these uses

Certainly not from boiling urine on an industhe early 1800s, chemists had determined that

bones also contained phosphates. Animal bones were used

when

but

first,

it

became apparent

were not enough

that there

human

of these, battlefields were scoured for

bones.

was

It

only upon discovery of massive deposits of phosphate rock

at

various places around the globe that phosphorous finally be-

came

readily and cheaply available. Today,

manufactured on

phosphorous

is

by heating phosphate rock

a massive scale

with carbon in a process reminiscent of Hennig Brandt's early efforts.

There were several problems with the "white phosphorous"

produced

in earlier times. First,

it

was poisonous, and many

people working with the substance died from "phossy jaw." This condition was caused by phosphorous vapors entering the

body through decayed

jawbones were affected

phorous

it

was

converted into a rous,"

The

if it

first

first.

and destroying bones

The other problem was

Both of these

ignites so easily.

come when

teeth

much

safety matches

ground

glass to

ignition.

were over-

as

"red phospho-

atmosphere of nitrogen or argon.

were made by gluing some sulfur and

potassium chlorate to the head of

on the box they came

known

safer form,

in an

that phos-

phosphorous could be

realized that white

was heated

difficulties

— the

in

was

a

wooden

splint.

Provided

a striking surface coated

with

provide friction and with red phosphorous for

The phosphorous would

light the sulfur,

which, in the

presence of the oxygen released by the chlorate, would burn

and

ignite the

The

last

wood.

improvement

in

match manufacture evolved from

the idea that sulfur and phosphorous can be

thereby produce a sulfide.

compound known

This substance

is

as

not toxic and

—

264

—

made

to react

and

phosphorous sesqui-

it is

unaffected by the

THE BOTTOM LINE air:

through have

when

does, however, ignite

it

friction.

potassium chlorate

—

matches have

all

as oxidizer,

raised

is

Modern strike-anywhere matches

phosphorous sesquisulfide

a tip of

generator

temperature

its

therefore

as igniting agent,

and powdered

glass as heat

Modern

held together with glue.

safety

head covered with potassium chlorate, which

a

is

struck against a surface covered with red phosphorous and

antimony ignite the

sulfide.

The

chlorate provides the oxygen needed to

phosphorous, which

ignites the sulfide,

make use

the match. Incidentally, caps for toy guns

combination of elements

which

— the striking of

ignites

of the same

mixture of

a

sulfur,

red phosphorous, and potassium chlorate causes a mini explosion.

Brandt surely never dreamed that

such fame. But our look is

at the

his urine

would achieve

contributions of urine to science

not yet over.

Chemistry can be divided into two basic analysis

fields of

endeavor:

and synthesis. Analytical chemists determine which

fundamental substances

a given material

is

composed

of,

while

compounds from molecular buildmade attempts both at analysis and

synthetic chemists assemble

ing blocks.

The

synthesis, but

alchemists

we

can hardly refer to their secretive, bungling,

and often chaotic experiments

By

as science.

the middle of the

eighteenth century, a

new breed

True

Boyle, Priestley, Lavoisier, Newton, and

scientists

such

as

Dalton became interested

and

their sole motivation

what

their

The

of scientists

was emerging.

in unraveling the secrets of nature,

was

curiosity.

world was made of and

how

prevailing opinion at the time

be divided into two categories

They wanted

to

things worked.

was

that

all

matter could

— organic and inorganic. Rocks

and minerals, which were obviously

lifeless,

were

said to be

inorganic, whereas those substances that could be isolated living systems

were referred

organic materials, such as

know

from

to as organic. Furthermore, these

opium from £65

the

poppy or quinine

HULA HOOPS. AND PLAYFUL

RAHAR,

from the cinchona

were thought to possess

tree,

PICS a vital force

that could never be duplicated by humans.

While there was no doubt

that chemists could manipulate

inorganic substances — for centuries they had been extracting

metals from their ores and turning them into swords and

ploughshares

—

making organic substances from inorganic

ones was deemed impossible.

one had better

know where

If

one wanted

vanilla flavoring,

to find a vanilla bean.

Once

All of this changed suddenly and dramatically in 1828.

was

again, the focal point

urine.

As

early as 1773, French

chemist Hilaire-Marin Rouelle had isolated a white crystalline substance from urine, which appropriately came to be called urea. Since this material

body,

it

had been synthesized by the human

was obviously "organic" and could not be made

laboratory

— or

at least

carried out

made by

some

it

was so believed

when German chemist

mental day in 1828

on

tests

a

until that

in the

monu-

Friedrich Wohler

white crystalline material he had

heating a mineral substance called

ammonium

isocy-

anate.

When he treated the crystals with nitric at

once a precipitate of glistening

that he

had seen

this

acid they

scales." It

"produced

seemed to Wohler

kind of an effect before

— he racked

his

brains until he remembered that the natural urea he had once worked with showed similar behavior with the acid. He immediately procured tical to

some urea and demonstrated

the white crystals

ammonium

isocyanate.

made by

Wohler wrote

man

it

was iden-

to his former professor

Jacob Berzelius in great excitement: "I must

make urea without

that

heating his "inorganic"

tell

you

that

I

can

the use of kidneys or of any animal, be

or dog." Indeed, in one

fell

swoop he had made

it

urea,

destroyed the theory that organic substances possessed some vital force,

and

built a

permanent bridge linking inorganic and

organic chemistry. All of a sudden, the potential of chemistry

—

£66

—

THE BOTTOM seemed

limitless:

it

urea could be

INI

'

made

in the laboratory, so,

perhaps, could quinine, or vanillin, or a whole host of substances that didn't even exist yet.

For chemists, Wohler's synthesis of urea buried the idea of difference thetic urea it

became

was

in every

way

identical to the natural substance,

clear that the properties of a specific

depended only on

composition and not on

its

Wohler's urea was every bit as good a variety because

was

it

identical to

than 150 years after Wohler's

somehow

feat,

superior to synthetic

it

its

ancestry.

interesting that

more

the notion that natural

is still

is

subscribed to by a sig-

Many

natural vitamin C, for example, contains

makes

compound

fertilizer as the natural

It is

it.

nificant portion of the general public.

erty that

a

between synthetic and natural substances. Since syn-

some

still

believe that

intangible prop-

better than synthetic ascorbic acid.

Wohler's accidental synthesis of urea was soon followed by

another important chemical development involving urine.

German chemist

Ludwig Reichenbach was interested in isolating chemicals from beechwood tar. There was plenty of this stuff around, because beechwood was used to make the Karl

charcoal required for the factories that smelted metals from their ores.

Reichenbach, in

fact,

became the

first

chemist to pre-

wood tar by distillation. aroma of creosote gave Reichenbach an

pare creosote, the liquid obtained from

The idea.

rather disagreeable

His house was surrounded by a wooden fence, which

much

to his

male dogs raising

annoyance

in the

around

—

— often received the attention of the

neighborhood. In an effort to discourage leg

his property, the inventive

chemist painted the

fence with creosote, but the dogs did not share Reichenbach's

opinion about the foulness of the smell and kept adorning the fence with their urine.

The

failure of creosote to act as a

dog

repellent, however,

resulted in an important scientific discovery. Reichenbach

—

267

—

HULA HOOPS, AND PLAYFUL

RAHAR, observed that

blue color became visible where creosote,

a

wood, and urine came dye and named

PIGS

"pittacal,"

it

He

into contact.

soon isolated

from the Greek words

and "beautiful." Reichenbach went on to prepare pure

state,

met with

and he even

tried to sell

it

pittacal in a

commercial dye.

as a

He

success in this area, but pittacal maintains an

little

important place in chemical history

as the first synthetic

Henry

This was some 25 years before William

stuff.

a blue

for "tar"

dye-

Perkin's

celebrated discovery of mauve.

We

have actually

known

that urine can play an important

role in color formation since time

immemorial. Primitive dyers

understood that certain substances help natural dyes adhere to fabrics.

These materials came to be known

from the Latin word for

wool

is

simmered

pens, but is

dyed.

when

in

"mordants,"

For example, when cotton or

water with onion skin nothing

a little

The alum

"bite."

as

alum

is

much

added to the solution, the

hap-

fabric

helps the natural pigments in the onion skin

"bite" into the fabric.

The discovery

of the mordant effect

accidental one, probably occurring

was undoubtedly an

when people observed

that

the addition of club mosses to dyeing solutions improved the colors that could be achieved. These mosses are

now known

be good natural sources of alum. Such observations surely

to

trig-

gered further experimentation with readily available substances

— and what

is

more

of these worked.

steeped in urine to still

readily available than urine or

Roman make

a

ladies actually

dung? Both

used mullein leaves

yellow hair dye. In India, cotton

is

mordanted with cow dung. Before the discovery of syn-

thetic indigo,

one method of dyeing with natural indigo extract

involved steeping the fabric in heated urine. During the nineteenth century, as chemical knowledge and laboratory tech-

niques became more refined, attention naturally turned to the

mechanism through which urine achieves 268

its

color-enhancing

BO

Till

effect. Textile

roM

i

I

INI

manufacturers obviously had a vested interest

in

this project.

Adolf Schlieper was

a

German

had gained some experience

in

manufacturer

textile

who

chemistry by working in the

laboratory of Justus von Liebig, one of the leading chemists of

worked on

the era. Schlieper had

uric acid, a white crystalline

substance that Scheele had isolated from urinary stones almost a

hundred years before. Uric acid

the urine of

carnivores and

all

excrement of birds, scaly quirk of evolution

is

is

found

the major

amounts

component

reptiles, caterpillars,

and

work on

uric acid never

known

in

in the

— by some

— Dalmatian dogs. Deposits of uric acid

the joints cause the painful condition Schlieper's

in small

in

as gout.

amounted

to very

much.

His main contribution to science was that he gave some of the chemicals he had been working with to another young chemist, Adolf

von Baeyer. His

to carry out research

on

interest aroused,

uric acid

and

its

German

Baeyer began

derivatives;

it

was one

of these derivatives that brought Baeyer lasting fame. Starting

with uric

acid,

he prepared a brand-new white crystalline com-

pound, christening ries as to

that the

it

"barbituric acid." There are several theo-

why Baeyer chose this particular name. Some contend compound was named after a Munich waitress who

had often provided the raw research material. Others say that the discovery took place

on

St.

Barbara's Day. Baeyer himself

implied in his lectures that at the time he was in love with a

"Miss Barbara"

(this,

of course, does not negate the waitress

story).

Although the origin of the name may be contentious, there is

no doubt

that Baeyer's discovery of barbituric acid lay the

foundations for the development of one of the most important classes of medicinal drugs: the barbiturates.

these

compounds

is

The importance

of

based on the fact that they are central-

nervous-system depressants and can induce

269

effects ranging

RADAR.

HULA HOOPS, AND PLAYFUL

from mild sedation

many

to

deep

PIGS

used

sleep. Barbiturates are

prescription sleep medications and are also widely

in

em-

ployed in surgical anesthesia. Baeyer never noted any sedative but this

is

not surprising because barbituric acid

no hypnotic

lutely

effect of barbituric acid,

properties. It

most famous student, who of barbituric acid, fifty years after

was Emil

itself

has abso-

Fischer, Baeyer's

finally discovered that a derivative

known

as barbital, induces sleep.

Baeyer's

first

Almost

synthesis of barbituric acid,

working with physician Joseph von Mering, demon-

Fischer,

strated that a

dog receiving

a single injection of barbital

would

In light of this effect, Fischer renamed the substance

fall asleep.

"Veronal," after Verona,

most

restful city in the

gery,

we

Italy,

which he considered

world. Today,

when

to be the

anticipating sur-

can rest easy because Adolf von Baeyer's interest in

urine eventually led to the right chemistry.

Fart Proudly Benjamin Franklin was

a practical

man.

He

gave us the

Franklin stove, the lightning rod, and bifocal glasses: science

was

to be used for the benefit of

mankind, the great inventor

maintained. Academic societies that emphasized obscure theoretical discussions often fell

In 1783, the Royal

members

that

Academy

victim to Franklin's witty wrath. of Brussels posed a question to

had to do with the number of times

its

a certain

geometric shape could be inscribed inside another, larger shape. This kind of philosophical conjecture did not

with Franklin, and to the

when

the

academy implied

problem could actually have

Franklin put his

He was

satirical

pen

sit

well

that the solution

practical applications,

to paper.

happy, he wrote to the academy, to hear that the

—

27o

—

Till

was

institution tial

to

VI

society.

NE

with matters that had the poten-

finally dealing

improve

Li

And,

this

being the case, he had a

suggestion for a future project of great practical significance that he

hoped the academicians would

academy of

tell

human

produce

us

how we

consider.

the

can eliminate the disturbing fragrance

gaseous emissions? Franklin noted that

gas,

Could

all

humans

but most people take great pains to hold back

their eruptions lest they be accused of unsociable behavior.

This type of restraint can cause bloating, colic, and constipation,

he continued. Therefore, he was challenging the learned

academy members "To discover some drug wholesome and not disagreeable, to be

mixed with our

common

Food, or Sauces,

that shall render the Natural Discharges of

Wind from our

Bodies, not only inoffensive, but agreeable as Perfumes."

Franklin even had

some suggestions

might be approached. Since

it

as to

was common

how

the project

practice to

throw

lime into toilets in order to dispel nasty odors, perhaps the

academy's lution that

scientists

could come up with some sort of lime so-

humans could

ingest. Or, failing this,

what about

the possibility of adding pleasant fragrances to food to im-

prove the scent of the emissions? Indeed, wearing perfume to please others, would

—

271

—

it

in the fashion of

not be possible to

HULA HOOPS, AND PLAYFUL

RADAR,

aromatize flatus to make also

PICS

not only socially acceptable but

it

desirable — the scent of

lily

for

some

occasions,

musk

for

others?

Franklin obviously had his tongue firmly planted in his

cheek

—

human

he certainly did not regard flatulence

The Royal Academy

affliction.

major

as a

of Brussels never re-

sponded to the Franklin challenge, but modern science

has. It

has broken the silence about this once-taboo topic because after

everybody does

all,

quite acceptable

Fart, that

it.

"breaking wind"; even Chaucer used

but anyone bothered by

by

for "flatus advanced

He who

is

Oh

it

in

The

by

ried out

amined the

a

an acronym

rectal transport." farts.

a direct

So does

she.

To put

The

earliest

work

is

in this area

newly executed

intestinal gas of

sim-

it

consequence of swallowing

Frenchman named Magendie, who,

identification of

is

Miller's Tale), it

and food. The mechanism of human ventilation quite well understood.

term

yes, the

should just consider

it

breaths and eats,

production

ply, gas

is.

from an ancient Greek word for

derives

(it

air

actually

was

car-

in 1816, ex-

criminals. His

carbon dioxide, nitrogen, and methane became

the cornerstone of the science of flatology. Magendie, however,

missed the most interesting intestinal

gas,

hydrogen, and was

also unable to determine the origin of the odiferous effluents.

Chemistry has

now come

to the rescue. These days, an

instrumental technique called gas chromatography makes the analysis of

material requires a a

Dutch

unknown

is

little

when an

for the trations

ill

Though

the

raw research

same

imagination and daring. Dr. Albert Tangerman,

gastroenterologist, provided six subjects with gas-

collection syringes,

ends

gases quite easy.

quite abundant, the actual collection of

which they were

to press against their rear

outburst was imminent. The gases responsible

wind turned out

— actually

less

to be present in very small concen-

than

—

1

percent of the total volume

272

—

—

Till.

BOTTOM

LI Nil.

but there were some 250 ghastly components, with hydrogen

dimethyl

sulfide, methanethiol, skatole,

disulfide responsible for

Where do lowed

air,

these gases

but the bulk

sulfide,

and dimethyl-

most of the odor.

come from? Some come from

— that

is,

swal-

the hydrogen, methane, and

— are produced by the action of bacteria on

carbon dioxide sugars, starches,

and

fiber in the colon.

Whatever components

of these dietary staples are not digested and absorbed into the

bloodstream

they pass through the small intestine serve as

as

dinner for gut bacteria. The products of bacterial digestion are the aforementioned gases, but individuals have unique bacterial flora in the

colon and therefore produce

Methane, for example,

as fingerprints.

a third of

unique

detected only in about

humans. Caucasians and Blacks produce more than

Orientals.

lower

is

fart patterns as

noteworthy that methane production

also

It is

in those

is

with Crohn's disease and higher in those with

colon cancer. The potency and frequency of emissions erned mostly by the

diet.

is

Certain carbohydrates, such as

nose, stachyose, and verbascose, present a significant

govraffi-

problem

because humans lack the enzyme necessary to digest them.

Hence coli.

the potency of beans, cabbage, cauliflower, and broc-

Lactose, better

known

as

milk sugar,

as well as pectins

and

beta-glucans in oat bran, are notorious gas producers.

We actually know a surprising amount about gas production and

its

effects

because various practical concerns have stimu-

lated research in this area.

For example, during World War n,

the development of fighter planes capable of reaching very

high altitudes presented

a

novel problem. As the planes

climbed, pilots began to experience abdominal cramps. Every

student of elementary physics pressure

is

knows

reduced, and in this case

in the pilots' guts that

it

that gases

expand

was the expanding

as

gases

caused bloating and pain. Responding to

the problem, the us Air Force explored the nature of the foods

—

273

—

RADAR,

HULA HOOPS, AND

that caused the greatest discomfort,

PLAV! UL PIGS

and concluded that beans

and legumes were incompatible with avoidance of these foods

flying. Allied pilots'

may even have been

partially respon-

sible for their success against the Luftwaffe: the

fond of sauerkraut, which

One

is

Germans were

an extremely potent gas producer.

of the greatest boosts for flatus research was the advent

of the Space Age.

The

control of the internal atmosphere in a

space vehicle was a formidable challenge. Removal of the car-

bon dioxide exhaled by

the astronauts

was naturally

but some scientists also focused in on

how

a concern,

to deal with the

buildup of methane and hydrogen in the capsule. These

human

emissions are highly flammable and were deemed a potential

hazard in the oxygen-rich atmosphere of the spacecraft. Accordingly, the astronauts' diet

was

specially formulated to exclude

gas-producing ingredients.

Such attention to

detail has

prevented embarrassing accidents

in outer space, but inner-space

problems

persist. Intracolonic

explosions have actually occurred, sometimes with dire conse-

quences.

Growths

removed

to reduce the risk of colon cancer.

relatively simple

in the colon, called polyps, are routinely

The procedure

one and involves inserting

is

a

a snare-equipped

probe into the colon. The minor bleeding that usually accompanies the removal of the polyp tion

— and therein

lies

stopped by electrocauteriza-

is

the problem. Prior to the procedure,

the patient's colon has to be emptied, and this

is

usually ac-

complished by having the patient drink large volumes of laxative solution. Laxatives

work

a

precisely because they are

not absorbed by the body and are thus quickly propelled

through the digestive

tract.

A

solution of mannitol, for

example, will provide a very clean working environment for the physician, but mannitol also serves as food for intestinal bacteria gas. If

and therefore promotes the formation of hydrogen

any of

this gas is

present

—

274

when

—

electrocauterization

is

THE BO FTOAI

LIN!.

performed, both patient and doctor could be in for a nasty shock. Indeed, there have been cases where intestines have

been ripped apart and doctors blown clear across the room.

When

there

is

lon, flushing

a suspicion of

hydrogen gas buildup

in the co-

with carbon dioxide before the procedure can

prevent a great deal of misery.

For doctors, for lawyers,

it

intestinal gas

can be an occupational hazard;

can be a financial windfall. Witness the story of

the cashier in a Portland,

Oregon, grocery store

who was

accused of tormenting another employee by willfully and

The victim sued

repeatedly passing gas. stress

how

and humiliation." During the

trial,

for "severe mental

the plaintiff described

the perpetrator of this heinous crime

would "hold

it

in

and walk funny to get to me." The clever defense attorney, however, used the argument that breaking wind

by

free speech guaranteed

the First

is

a

form of

Amendment. The judge

agreed, and the prosecutor's case fizzled out.

Le Petomane The

celebrated performer, dressed magnificently in waistcoat,

red breeches, white stockings, and black patent-leather shoes, strode proudly to the center of the capacity

crowd was

Moulin Rouge

French entertainer of the

Gay

Nineties.

stage.

The

most famous

thrilled to see, at last, the

Not even the renowned commanded as

Sarah Bernhardt had as great a public appeal or

high a fee as did Joseph Pujol. Pujol was a musician of sorts, but he played no instrument. Rather, he himself

was

a musical instrument

—

a

wind

instru-

ment. This illustrious entertainer had the ability to suck into his

the air

air

body by relaxing his abdominal muscles and then expel at will by controlling his rectal sphincter. The unique

—

275

—

HULA HOOPS, AND

RADAR.

1 I

elasticity of this particular part of Pujol's

to

produce sounds ranging from

ping of cloth.

wind

It

L

Ay

U

1

PIGS

L

anatomy allowed him

a clap of

thunder to the

rip-

has been said that he elevated the passing of

to an art form.

Spectators

would howl

gleefully

when "Le Petomane,"

as

Pujol came to be known, performed a series of wind-passing

sound

by

effects: his interpretations

booms produced

of the sonic

and the barely

bricklayers, the apologetic tones of nuns,

audible staccato bursts released night usually brought

down

Petomane blowing out

by brides on

Joseph Pujol was indeed a

young boy, he discovered

The

the house.

a candle in his

act

their

ended with Le

unique fashion.

scientific curiosity.

his "talent"

wedding

one day

While

still

a

He

at the beach.

held his breath, put his head under the water, and was shocked to feel a cold, penetrating sensation in his

abdomen. Rushing

out of the water, young Joseph was astonished to find water rushing out of him; he soon learned that his body could be

made will.

to act as a giant pipette, sucking in

Then came

and releasing water

at

the formidable discovery that he could also

inhale and expel air in this extraordinary fashion, and so

born what was arguably the most amazing novelty

was

act of

all

time.

Pujol sold the act to the manager of the Moulin inimitable way.

Having brought

a basin filled

the gentleman's office, he proceeded to the vessel while sitting

upon

also treated to a selection of

"Au

clair

de

la

it.

Rouge

in his

with water into

empty and then

refill

The bewildered manager was

sound

effects

and to

a rendition of

lune" played on a flute in a decidedly original

fashion. Needless to say, Pujol got the job.

Le Petomane became the

imitators, but they could never

and were quickly blown away. Thibeau, enjoyed a

fair

He

inspired

many

match the great man's

talent

toast of Paris.

One

lady,

however, Angele

degree of success as a female Petomane.

276

THE BOTTOM LIN

I

She promised no trickery or offensive odor and even offered a

money-back guarantee

— customers only had to pay

liked the show. Apparently, though, sort to

some

Madame Thibeau

if

they

did re-

chicanery, because she stopped performing

when

Pujol sued her, claiming that she used mechanical devices to

produce sounds that to him came naturally.

Can we

learn anything

from

Pujol's

unique

gift?

He

himself

recognized the singular nature of his talent and accepted 25,000 francs

from

examine

a

medical school in exchange for his permission to

body

his

after death.

former passed on in 1892

However, when the

at the

peerless per-

age of 88, his children were not

keen on pushing back the frontiers of science and nixed the

postmortem.

It is

interesting to note that every

Petomane cleansed

great

and was never sick

a

own

his insides in his

day

in his

morning the

singular fashion

life.

Some Final Views on the Nature of Science I

hope we've had some fun together and

some

light

on

a

in the process shed

few chemical mysteries. Perhaps, along the

way, we've even learned some principles of chemistry and en-

gaged in a

little

critical thinking.

While

I

know

probably forget most of what you read here,

I

that you'll

hope the

I'm about to summarize will leave their mark. After

been said that education forgotten 1.

what you have

Science

is

Such corrections

practice of bloodletting

was realized

what you're

left

— but

it

with

after

all,

it's

you've

learned.

a truth-seeking process. It

unassailable "truths"; pline.

is

ideas

is,

may

is

not a collection of

however, a self-correcting take a long time

went on

for centuries before

as scientific

its futility

knowledge accumulates, the

chance of making substantial errors decreases.

277

disci-

— the medical

HULA HOOPS, AND PLAYFUL

RADAR, 2.

Certainty

is

elusive in science

and

"No" answers

categorical "Yes" or

it is

to

water, for example, one

would have

is

whose

two

all

respects except for the type of water they

virtually undoable.

dence

in

3. It

We therefore

formulating

may

many

scientific

ques-

preferable to tap

to design a lifelong study

of

large groups of people

often hard to give

many

tions. To determine whether bottled water

PIGS

lifestyles

were similar

consumed. This

have to rely on

in is

less direct evi-

of our conclusions.

not be possible to predict

all

consequences of an

action,

no matter how much advance research has been done.

When

chlorofluorocarbons (cfcs) were introduced as refriger-

ants,

no one could have predicted

would have an impact on sirable happens,

it is

that 30 years later they

the ozone layer. If something unde-

not necessarily because someone has been

negligent. 4.

Any new

skeptic

is

finding should be examined with skepticism.

not a person

someone who bases

who

is

unwilling to believe; a skeptic

his or her beliefs

on

scientific

A is

proof and

does not swallow information uncritically. 5.

No

major

lifestyle

change should be made on the basis of

any one study. Results should be independently confirmed by others.

Keep

in

mind

that science does not proceed

breakthroughs" or "giant leaps."

It

by "miracle

plods along, taking

many

small steps, slowly building towards a consensus. 6.

field.

Studies have to be carefully interpreted

An

association of

ply cause and

effect.

two

by experts

in the

variables does not necessarily im-

As an extreme example, consider

the

strong association between breast cancer and the wearing of skirts:

obviously, the wearing of skirts does not cause the dis-

ease. Scientists,

for

however, sometimes show an amazing aptitude

coming up with inappropriate

theories.

278

rationalizations for their pet

THL BOTTOM Repeating

7.

Many

'

notion often does not make

a false

—

children

not because they have examined studies to

but because they have heard that

effect

of studies has demonstrated that,

on

ing effect

in

this

so. In fact, a slate

it is

anything, sugar has a calm-

if

children.

Nonsensical lingo can sound very

8.

true.

it

people are convinced that sugar causes hyperactivity

An

scientific.

ad for a

tvpe of algae states that "the molecular structure of chlorophyll

is

almost the same

hemoglobin, which

as that of

the prime nutrient and chlorophyll

oxygen

increasing

available to

is

is

re-

Oxygen

sponsible for carrying oxygen throughout the body.

is

the central molecule for

your system." This

is

nonsense:

chlorophyll does not transport oxygen in the blood. 9.

There will often be legitimate opposing views on

issues,

but the notion that science cannot be trusted because

for every study there rect. It is

is

an equal and opposite study

always important to take into account

out a given study,

how

well

it

the "they"

"they say" 10.

is

who

incorcarried

in "they say that

.

results.

..." In

Be mindful of

many

cases,

what

only gossip, inaccurately reported.

Humans

posed to

is

is

was designed, and whether any-

one stands to gain financially from the

who

scientific

are biochemically unique.

a cold virus will

Not everyone

ex-

develop a cold. Individual response

to medications can be dramatically different. Eating fish can be

healthy for 11.

many but deadly

Animal

although they cillin,

for those with an allergy (like me).

studies are not necessarily relevant to

may

for example,

provide is

much

safe for

Rats do not require vitamin

valuable information. Peni-

humans but

C

humans,

toxic for guinea pigs.

as a dietary nutrient

but humans

do. Feeding high doses of a suspected toxin to test animals over the short term

may

not accurately

reflect the effect

exposed to tiny doses over the longterm.

279

on humans

HULA HOOPS, ANO PLAYFUL

RADAR, Whether

12.

a substance

mined only by the dosage.

It

is

a

poison or

a

PIGS

remedy

deter-

is

does not make sense to talk about

the effects of certain substances

on

body without

the

talking

about amounts. Licking an aspirin tablet will do nothing for a headache, but swallowing two tablets will

go away. Swallowing a whole bottle of tient

make

pills will

the headache

make

the pa-

go away.

"Chemical"

13.

is

not a dirty word. Chemicals are the build-

— they

ing blocks of our world

are neither

good nor bad.

Nitroglycerin can alleviate the pain of angina or blow up a building.

The choice

between the its

is

ours. Furthermore, there

Nature

14.

is

relation

posed by a substance and the complexity of

risk

name: dihydrogen monoxide

as ricin

no

is

is

just water.

not benign. The deadliest toxins known, such

from castor beans or botulin from the Clostridium

botulinum bacterium, are perfectly

natural. "Natural" does not

equal "safe," and "synthetic" does not equal "dangerous." properties of any substance are determined structure, not lab or 15.

by whether

by nature

it

The human body

determined by

genetics,

our

diet,

level of exercise,

tional hazards, 17.

While

molecular

in a plant.

risk than trace pesticide residues 16.

its

a chemist in a

Perceived risks are often different from real

poisoning from microbial contamination

is

by

was synthesized by

The

is

a large

on

is

fruits

risks.

Food

a far greater health

and vegetables.

incredibly complex and our health

number

of variables, which include

our mother's diet during pregnancy,

stress,

exposure to microbes, exposure to occupa-

and pure luck.

diet clearly plays a role in the

promotion of good

health, the effectiveness of specific foods or nutrients in the

treatment of diseases

is

usually overstated. Individual foods are

not good or bad, although overall diet such.

The wider

may

be described as

the variety of food consumed, the smaller the

28o

TML BOTTOM LINE chance that important nutrients will be lacking. There versal fruits 18.

agreement among

and vegetables

an extremely important

is

health of about 40 percent of test subjects will im-

prove significantly the

when

same percentage

they are given a placebo, and about

will exhibit

symptoms

substance they perceive as dangerous. Milton: the a hell 19.

uni-

beneficial.

The mind-body connection

The

one.

is

is

high consumption of

scientists that a

mind

is

in response to a

To paraphrase John

capable of making a heaven out of hell and

out of heaven.

About 80 percent

of

all

resolve in response to almost

remedy

will receive

and

illnesses are self-limiting

will

any kind of treatment. Often,

undeserved

credit.

unreliable, because positive results are

Anecdotal evidence

much more

a is

likely to be

reported than negative ones. 20. if

There

is

no goose

that lays golden eggs. In other words,

something sounds too good to be

H.L. Mencken once tion that

is

21. Virtually

Ours

is

is.

As

a solu-

arise will

become

and more complicated on deeper examination.

a fascinating

Nobody life

probably

"Every complex problem has

any subject or issue that may

interesting

your

it

simple, direct, plausible, and wrong."

more 22.

said,

true,

has a

by any

world.

monopoly on

set of rules

Will Rogers declared,

the truth, so don't guide

produced by an individual. As

"Everybody

issues."

£81

is

ignorant, only

on

different

INDEX

Amanita rubescens 147 American Brie 130 American Journal of Clinical

Abrams, Albert 236-38 Absinthe 210

Acid rain

17,

30-31

Acid-washed jeans 47

Nutrition 116

American Medical Association 241,

Aconite 239

252

Activated carbon 231

Adaptogen 196 Adenosine triphosphate (atp) 115

Amino acids 91 Ammonia 17, 62,

Aflatoxin 73

Air Sponge 232

Albedo 134-36

Albumen

91

Alchemist

19, 36, 164, 261,

265

Alcohol 41, 125

Wonderland

Ammonium Ammonium Ammonium Amyl Amyl

Alchemy 165 Alice in

Amidinohydrazone 204 2-Aminoacetophenone 31

145, 148

Allergies 109, 117, 118, 152, 177 Alliin 118, 120

Alpha-linolenic acid (ala) 117,

92,

229

isocyanate 266 laureth sulfate 214 nitrate 17, 183

acetate 39 nitrite

158

Amylopectin 48

Amylose 48 Anandamide 131-32 Anderson, Thomas 59

138-39

Androstadienone 207

5-Alpha-reductase 187

Androstenol 204-6

Alternative medicine 177, 257

Anemia 166

Alternative therapy 175-76

Anesthesia 182, 185

Aluminosiliactes 223, 233

Angina 84

Aluminum hydroxide 246

Angiogenesis 124

Alzheimer's disease 116, 199

Animal

Amanita muscaria 145—47 Amanita phalloides 73

Anklintzen, Constantin 36

electricity 19

Antidepressant 152-54

£83

HULA HOOPS, AND PLAyHJL

RADAR, Antimony

I

C iS

Barbital 270

sulfide 265

Barbiturates 269-70

Antioxidants 80-84, 86, 103, 105,

Barbituric acid 269-70

198

Antisense gene 108

Bari 16

Antisepsis 60

Beakman

Antony, Marc 178

Beakman's World

Anxiety

167-70

89,

18, 21

18, 21

Bedell, Berkley 176-77

Beechwood 267

Aphrodisiac 68, 105, 130-31, 143,

Bee pollen 174

207 Aphrodisin 202

Apple

P

75,

Beets 172, 174

87-89

Belladonna 240

Benzene 51

Apple cider 88 Apple Day 89

Benzodiazepines 169

Arecoline 31

Benzopyrene 190 Berliner, David 207

Aromatherapist 24

Berzelius, Jacob 266

Arsenic 78

Beta-carotene 80-85

Apple maggot

fly

Artifical hip joint

87

57

Beta-cyanins 172

Ascorbic acid 267

Betalains 172

Asparagus 172, 174

Betaxanthins 172

Aspergillus niger 75

Betel nuts 31

Aspirin 61, 200, 280

Bile acids 134-35

Asthmatic 97

Bilirubin 171-72

Athena Institute for Women 206 Athena Pheromone 10X™ 206

Biliverdin 171-72

Atropine 160

Biography 49

Attack of the Killer Tomatoes 108 Attention deficit disorder 116

Black powder 36-38, 41

Automata 20

Bleach 47, 228-29

Avicenna 164

Blood pressure 179 Blood sugar 89, 134

Ayurveda

146, 258

Billiard balls

41-42

Biotranformation 74-77

Blueberry 171

Back

Bologna 98

Future 21

to the

Bacon, Roger 37

Bones 264

Bakelite 61

Boring, Professor I.M. 21

Boron 89

Baking soda 219-20, 231, 245 Bald Headed

Men

of America

188, 189

1

86,

Bottled water 278

Botulin 17, 280

Baldness 185-88

Boxer shorts 67

Baldwin, Dr. Kate 253-54

Boyle, Robert (Boyle's Law) 32-35

Banana

Brain damage 96

oil

39

Barbie doll 54

Brandt, Hennig 261-65

284

INDEX Brazil nuts 189

Canola 117, 125, 138

Breast cancer 23, 122-25, 175, 192,

Cantharidin 141-44 Capsaicin 120

278 Breast implant 35

Captan 87

Brevibacterium epidermis 126

Carbaryl 88

Brie cheese 75, 126-27, 129

Carbolic acid 59

British

Medical Journal 142

Broccoli 125, 181

Carbon 251 Carbon dioxide

Bubbles 111-14

28, 77, 80, 92,

111-13, 157,243-45,247,272,

274-275

Bull meat 100

Butylated hydroxy toluene (bht)

Carbonic acid 92

Carbon monoxide 23 Cardiomyopathy 189, 190

78,82 Butyric acid 126

Carotenoids 86

Cabbage

122, 125

Carroll,

Calcium

Lewis 145, 148

Carrots 82, 83, 86

Caffeine 131 28, 30, 179-82,

222-34

Casanova 143

Calcium bicarbonate 31

Casein 32

Calcium carbonate

Cassava 73

28, 30-31, 178

Calcium caseinate 32

Cataracts 85-86

Calcium chloride 88

Catechins 102, 104

Calcium chlorophosphate 226

Cavities 89

Calcium

cc-84 15

citrate 181

Calcium gluconate 181 Calcium hydroxide 32

Celluloid 39, 41-43

Calcium hypochlorite 229-30

Cellulose 41

Calcium

Cellulose nitrate 42

Cellulase 47

lactate, 181

Calcium oxide, 29-30,

32,

Central Intelligence Agency (cia)

230

Calcium phosphate 128, 180 Calgene 108-9 California

202-3 Cervical cancer 83

Gold Rush 45

Chalk

178, 182

Camellia sinensis 102

Challenger 246

Camel milk 128 Camembert 94, 126-27, 129

Champagne 111-14 Chapman, George 258 Chapman, John 88

Camphor

42

Canadian Brie 129

Charcoal 36-38, 41

Canadian Chemical Society 14

Charlemagne 129

Cancer

Chaucer 272

17, 23, 32,

83-84, 86, 89,

101, 103, 110, 122-25, 134, 136,

Cheese 126-30

175-76, 189-93, 196,214,274,

Chemically free

278

Chemical magician 57

Cannabis 132

16,

24

Chemical weather predictor 52

285

RADAR, Chemistry

HULA HOOPS, AND PLAYFUL

50-53

sets

Cotton 40-41, 65-66

Chicken feed 85

Coumadin 200

Chicken soup 118-21

Coumaric

Chinese Restaurant Syndrome 93,

Counterfeiting 50

96

acid 110

Counterfeit

Chloramine 229 Chlorine

17,

PIGS

money 47

Courtaulds 67

Cow

228-30, 232

dung 268

Creosote 267-68

Chlorofluorocarbons (cfcs) 62-65,

Crete 137-40

278 Chlorogenic acid

89,

110

Crickets 15

Chlorophyll 279

Cronstedt, Baron A.

Chocolate 130-32

Crystaldyne pain reliever 238

Cholesterol 80, 88-90, 102-3, 124,

Cuticle (hair) 215-16

Cyanide

266

tree

233

Cutler, Winnifred 206-7

130, 133, 135, 138, 181, 194, 199

Cinchona

F.

73,

157-58

Citric acid 215

Cyclosporin 76-77

Clark, Barney 121

Cysteine 118-19

Cleopatra 178

Cytochrome oxidase 156

Clostridium botulinum bacteria 99

Cobalt chloride 52-53

Cobaltous

Daidzen,122 d-Alpha-tocopherol 197, 199

sulfate 53

Cocamide monoethanolamine 214 Cockroach 202-3 Cockroach perfume 203 Cocoa 130, 133

Datura stramonium 160

Coital frequency 248

Coital noise pollution 249

Deadly Orgone Buster 259 Deadly Orgone Energy 259

Cold 118-21,242

Dead Sea 27

Collagen 215

Defibrillation 235

Collodion 41-42

Colon cancer

89, 196,

274

Davis, Jacob 46

Davis,

Davy,

Wade 159-61 Humphrey 183

Degorgement 113 Demerol 155

Colorectal cancer 191

Dentures 42

Color Light Therapy Lamps 255 Color television 226 Color therapy 251-52

Deoxyribonucleic acid (dna) 80, 108

Depression 115-16, 152, 154

Colostrum 176-77 Conjurer 11

Detergent 214, 219, 221-25, 234

Constantine 98

Dichlorodifluoromethane 62

Copper Copper

Digitalis 195,

46,

236

sulfate 53

Cordus, Valerius 183 Cortes,

Hernando 130

dha

116-18

Dickson, William 39

208-9

Dihydrogen monoxide

25,

280

Dihydrotestosterone 187-88

£86

INDEX Dillinger,

John 47^9

Dimethicone

77,

Ergot alkaloids 150-51 Estebany, Oskar 257

215

Dimethyl disulfide 201-2, 273

Estratetraenol 207

Dimethvl sulfide 131, 201, 273

Estrogen 122-25, 180

Dinosaurs 68

Estrogen receptors 123

Dinshah Health Society of Malaga

Ether 41, 166, 183-85

:

;

Ethiopian civet cat 204

-

Dipple, Johan

Conrad 19

Ethyl Corporation 234

Ethylene 54-55, 107

Dipple's Oil 20

Docosahexaenoic acid (dha)

11 5-1

Ethylene glycol 227

Documents in the Case, The 147 Dodgson, Charles 145

Ethylene oxide 232

Dom

Fake slush 47

Perignon 111-12

Dona Marina 130 Dopamine 154, 170

Faraday, Michael 51, 183

Dynamizer 237

Fart 270

Dyslexia 116

Fat 78, 80, 85, 90, 99-100, 115-17,

Eastman, George 39

fbi

Fargue, Leon-Paul 126

125-26, 132, 137

Thomas

Edison,

39—40, 61

edta 53

Federation of American Societies for Applied Biology (fasab) 96

Efalex 116

Egg 89-93, 140 Eisner,

Thomas

Fermentation 102 Ferrets 84

144

Elastin 215 Electrical

Electric

43^4, 48

Feces 171, 173

Fertilizer 15

dynamo

Feuchtwanger, Anton Ludwig 98

51

Liniment 236

Electricity-

Fiber 134

236-37

Finasteride (Proscar, Propecia) 188

Electrolysis 51

Fingerprints 49

Electro Medical Hall 251

Firecrackers 37

Electron spin resonance (esr) 79

Fischer,

Emperor Charlev

V

130

Endorphins 132 Endurance 196-97

Flatology 272 Flatus 272

Energy aura 255

Enzymes 74-75, 126-27,

Emil 270

Fish 114, 116-18, 193

Flavonoids 89, 102 223, 232-

Flavr Savr tomato 108

Flaxseed 117, 139-40

33

Ephedrine 155, 195

Fluorescein 226

Epigallocatechin-3-gallate (egcg)

Fluorescence 225, 227 Fluorescent materials 226

101-3, 105

Epilepsy 238, 210

Fly agaric

Equol 122

Foam

—

287

mushroom

boosters 214

145, 147

HULA HOOPS, AND PLAyiUL

RADAR,

PIGS

Folic acid 124

Ginsenosides 194-97

Food and Drug Act of 1938 253 Food and Drug Administration

Glistridia 137

Glucose 48, 79-80, 156

Glue 32

(fda) 96

Ford, Arthur 141-42, 144

Glutamate

Frankenstein 18

Glutamic acid 94

Frankfurter 98

Glutathione 119

Franklin, Benjamin 23, 270-72

Glutathione peroxidase 80, 192

Free radicals 78-80, 83-84, 103, 192

Glycerin 24

Freiburg 36

Glycerol 215

Freon 62-65 Freud, Sigmund 258

Gold 261-62, 269 Gout 269

Frisbees 54

Grad, Bernard 257

frox corporation, 207 Frugal gourmet 24 Fugu 160 Fumaric acid 75

Grapefruit 76, 135

Furfuryl alcohol 131

Guncotton 41

Gachet, Dr. 209, 211

Gunpowder Gunpowder

94, 97

Great Phenol Plot, The 60

Green

tea 103

Guaifenesin 120

36, 44 tea 104

Galen 164 Galvani, Luigi 19

Hahnemann,

Galvanic Electric Belt 236

Haiti 159

Galvanism 19-20

Hales, Reverend Dr. 101 Halloween 69

Gamma-aminobutanoic

acid

Hamilton, James 186-87

(gaba), 168

Gamma-tocopherol 198-99

Hardness minerals 31 Harkin, Tom 176-77

Garlic 99, 103, 105, 120, 193

Harman, Denham 78

Gas (intestinal) 245, 271-75 Gas chromatography 272 Gas chromatography-mass

Harvey, William 120

Healing Scarf 250, 255

Heart attack 83-84,

spectrometry 218 Gasoline line

filter

Heart disease

52

Gauguin, Paul 210 Geller,

200

Genetic engineering 108 Genetic engineers 47

hfcs 64

Genistein 122, 124

Gilchrist,

89, 139,

P.

High blood pressure 154 Himalayan musk deer 204

251-55

John 246

Ginger 120

Hippocrates 188

Ginseng 194-97

Hirsch, Alan 133

288

199

86, 101-2, 137-38,

Helium 34-35 Hemoglobin 79, 173, 257 2-Heptanone 127

Uri 174

Ghadiali, Dinshah

Dr. Samuel 240-41

INDEX Hitler,

Inorganic 265-66

Adolph 55

Day 69

hiv 73

International Magic

Hodgkin's disease 17

International unit 198

Hofmann, Albert 150 Homeopathy 239-42 Hormel 100 Hormones 185-87 Hot dogs 97, 99

Iodine 47-50

Houdini, Harry 69-72

Iron sulfide 93

Iodine poisoning 50 Iproniazid 153 Irgasan 67

Iron chloride 70

Hughes, Marli Brianna 242, 246

Iron supplements 171

Hula hoop

Isofavones 122-25

54, 56

Hyaluronic acid 216

Isoniazid 153

Hyatt, John Wesley 40-42

Ivory A2-M>

Hydrofluorocarbons 64

Hydrogen

30, 66, 246-47, 251, 272,

274-75

Jackson, Charles 183, 185 Jaeger, Dr.

Hydrogen cyanide 157 Hydrogen peroxide 218-20 Hydrogen sulfide 78, 93, 217-18, 273

Jeeves 114

Jockey shorts 67 Johnson, Robert Gibbon 105-6,

Hydrolyzed vegetable protein 100

Hydrox

5-Hydroxy-indolacetic acid

ions 221

Hyperactivity 95, 116, 279

Hypochlorous acid 229 Ibotenic acid 146

Icky Sticky

Foamy Slimey Ooey

Gooey Chemistry

Josephine, 204

Journal of the American Medical Association 255

(5-hiaa), 116 1

110

Jonagold apple 89

fecalis 171

Hydroxy

53

Journal of the Royal Society of Medicine 27-28

Karmanos Cancer Kava 167-70

Institute 110

Kavalactone 168-69

Keshan disease 190

Imperial Chemical Industries (ici)

54

Gustav 67

Jeans 43

Keys, Ancel 137

India 31, 38

KGB 155

Indiglo 218

Kinetoscope 40

Indigo 46-47, 268

Indonesia 74

King George III 173 Kipling, Rudyard 230 Kline, Nathan 153, 159

Infection 58

Klotz, Dr.

Inflatable bra 35

Kodak 39

Infrared light 65, 221

Kohama

Ingold, Keith 81

Krebaum, Paul 218

Indole-3-carbinol 125

289

LM. 27-28

138

1

RADAR,

HULA HOOPS, AND PLAYFUL

PIGS

Kricket Krap 15, 22

Ma Huang

Krieger, Dolores 256-57

MacMurray, Fred 21 Magendie 272 Magic chemical 11, 14

Kwok,

Ho Man

Dr.

94

155

Lactose 273

Magicians 69

1-Alpha-tocopherol 198

Magic mushrooms 148 Magnesium 222-34

Lancet, The 60, 242

Laudanum

Magnesium bicarbonate 31 Magnesium carbonate 31 Magnesium hydroxide 246 Magnet 237

165

Laughing-gas (nitrous oxide) 18384

Laundry Disks 221-23

Law

Lawrence, Joseph 58

Magnus, Albertus 19 Maimonides, Moses 1 1

Lead 179

Malaria 240

Le Petomane 275-77

Malic acid 75, 76

Licorice 171

Manganese 179 Manganese dioxide 30

of Infinitesimals 240

Ligue des

Femmes du Quebec, La

Mannitol 274

63

Limburger 126-27, 129

Marijuana 131

Lime

Match 262-65 Maynard, J. Parker Medicomat 238

29, 31-32,

175,230,271

Limelight 29-32

Limestone 30

Memory

Lind, James 175

Joseph 58-59

Lister,

Listerine 58 Little

8

Mermaid 224-27

41

196

Mencken, H.L. 281 Meniere's disease 209-10

Meralgia paresthetica 45

Long, Crawford 185 Lot 27-29

Mercury 24, 34, 65, 225 Methane 230, 272-74

Lot, Mrs. 27-29

Methanethiol 273

Louis

XV

111

Methemoglobin 158

Lovastatin 76

Methionine 193

Love 130-31

Methyl mercaptan

Luftwaffe 82, 86

Midgley,

Lumiere brothers 40

Mikey 242-44, 246

126, 234

Thomas 62-63

Lung cancer 83-84, 103

Milk sugar 273

Lupercalia 98

Miller's Tale,

Lwoff, Andre 120

Millikan, Robert 238

Lycopene 110

Mind-body connection 281

Lyme

Minoxidil (Rogaine) 188

disease 176

Lysergic acid diethylamide (lsd)

150

The 272

Mitchell, William 243-t4

Moet

et

Chandon

1 1

Moisture-wicking 66

29o

INDEX Monell Chemical Senses Center

Monoamine Monoamine

oxidase 154

New

cereal 171

England Journal of Medicine

35, 90, 94

oxidase inhibitors

New

(maois) 152-55

Monosodium glutamate (msg) 9397

Moose

Nerds

Neurotransmitter 94

206

York

Stress

Night blindness

Tabs 239

82, 85

Nightingale, Florence 58

Nimes 46

fur 226

Mordants 268

Nitrated cellulose 41

Morphine 17

Nitrates 88

Mortimer, John 152, 155

Nitre beds 38

Morton, William 183-85

Nitric acid 40, 41

Mosquito 127

Nitric oxide 179

Moulin Rouge 275-76

Nitrites 44-45, 100-1

Moustalevria 140

Nitrogen 24, 65, 234, 251, 272

msg symptom complex 96

Nitroglycerin 17, 24, 280

Mucodyne Mucus 119

120

Nitrosamines 81, 99-100, 199

Muscarine 148

N-linoleoylethanolamine 132

Muscimole 146

N-oleylethanolamine 132

Mushrooms 145 Musk 204, 208

Nootkatone 76-77

Mustard gas 16

Nye,

Mylar 34-35

Nylon 65-66

n- Acetylcysteine 119

Office of Alternative Medicine

Nitrous oxide 183

Norepinephrine 154 Bill

21

Naloxone 132 Naphthalene acetic acid 87 Napoleon 38, 204

Olive

Narcisse, Clairvius 159

Oolong

tea 102

Opium

17, 132,

National Center for

176-77 oil 125,

137-38

Olney, John 95

Complemen-

265

tary and Alternative Medicine

Optical brighteners 224

176-77

Oral cancer 32

Orange pekoe

National Organization Mobilized to Stop Glutamate,

The

Organic

16,

tea 102

265-66

(nomsg) 96 Nana, Guilio 56

Orgone accumulator 259 Orgone energy 259

Natural 16, 73, 198, 280

Oscilloclast 237-38

Natural apple flavor 75

Osteoarthritis 89

Natural Resources Defense

Osteoporosis 178-80

Council 22

Otama, Toshira 247

Nerds 25

Ott, Fred 39-40

291

—

1

74,

RADAR.

HULA HOOPS. AND PLAYFUL

Oxalic acid 70, 173

Phytoestrogens 123

Oxazepam

Pig balls 57

(Serax) 169

Oxidation 103, 199

Pigs 54, 57

Oxidizing agent 232

Pine nuts 117

Oxygen

198,221,234,251

156,

Ozone

Ping-Pong

25, 30, 37, 58-59, 79-80,

balls

PICS

43

Piperine 118, 120

63-65, 80, 278

Piss prophets 173 Pittacal

268

Pain 182

Placebo 165

Panacea 194, 197

Plain

Panthenol 215

and Easy Account of British

Fungi,

A

145

Paprika 99

Plasticizer 41

Paracelsus 19, 163-66

Pliny 118

Parkinson's disease 170

Pollen 177

Parmesan

Polyester 227

94, 96

Polyethylene 54-58

Pasta 47 Pasteur, Louis 59, 67

Polygalacturonase 107, 109

Pava 167

Polymers 54

Pectin 88-89, 134-36

Polyphenols 102-4, 133

Pekoe 102

Polypropylene 65-66

Penicillin

279

Polysorbate 60, 189

Penicillum roquefortii 128

Polyvinyl alcohol 87

Pepper 99 Pepto-Bismol 171

Poppy 265 Pop Rocks 242^6

Periplanone-B 202, 204

Porphyria 173

Perkin Medal 62

Potassium 118, 121

Perkin, William

Henry 268

Potassium carbonate 157

Pernod 210

Potassium chlorate 30, 263-65

Perrier 92

Potassium cyanide 156

pH

Potassium nitrate 37

balanced 215

Phelan and Collander 42

Potato 47-49

Phenol 58-61

Preti,

Phenylacetic acid 131

Priestley,

Phenylethylamine 131

Propecia 188

Pheromone 201-8 Phosmet 87

Propylene glycol 215

George 206 Joseph

1

82

Prostate cancer 110, 124, 176, 191,

Phosphates 223, 234. 262, 264

193

Phosphoglucomutase 44 Phosphorous 115, 262-65

Prostate enlargement 187-88

Phosphorous oxide 263

Protein 80, 90-91, 93, 100

Prostate-specific antigen (psa), 110

Phosphorous, red 264

Psilocin 148

Phosphorous sesquisulfide 264-65

Psilocybe

292

mushroom

148

INDEX Psilocybin 148

Rocking chair 249

Putter fish 160

Rogers, Will 281

Pujol,

Joseph 275-77

Roquefort 126-29 Rosa, Emily 255

Pulp 134 Purslane

137^0

Rouelle, Hilaire-Marin 266

Rumpole of Rye 150-51

Pvridaben 87

Qi or

°chi

w

258 Saint Anthony's fire 150

q-link Pendant 238 Quaternary

the Bailey 152-54

ammonium com-

Sake 120

Salem 148-51

pounds 214 Quinine 226, 240, 265, 267

Salsa sniffles 119 Salt

52

Radar 54-56, 82-83

Saltpeter 36-38, 41

Radiation 78

Santa Claus 147

Radio-Active Equilibrium 252

Sauerkraut 101

Radioactivity 23

Saunders,

Radio-Emanative Equilibrium 252

Sayers,

Raffinose 272

Scheele 269

Rasputin, Grigory 155-57

Schlieper,

Reagan, Ronald 14

Schonbein, Friedrich 40

Red blood

Schwarz, Berthold 36-39

cells

79

Herb 176-77 Dorothy 147 Adolf 269

Hugo

60-61

Refrigeration 63

Schweitzer,

Refrigerators 62

Scopolamine 160-61

Reich, Wilhelm 258-59

Scurvy 175

Reichenbach, Karl Ludwig 267

Remueur 113

Seaweed 94 Sebum 214-16

Renaud, Serge 139

Seizures 95

Rennet 127-28

Selenium 189-93

Reserpine 153, 159

Selenous acid 192

Respiratory arrest 95

Serotonin 132, 154

Rhinotherm 120-21

Serpent

Rhizopus nigricans 75

Seven Countries Study 137-38

Ribena 53

Sex 248

Ricin 73, 280

Shampoo 213-16

Rigor calcium carbonatus 28

Sharan, Balaram 247-48

Rio 16

Shelley,

rna 108 Roach Motel 204

Shen

Robert-Houdin, Jean-Eugene

and

the Rainbow,

Mary 18-19

Nung

101

Short-chain fatty acid 136 Siberian ginseng 194-95

70,

184

Silicon dioxide 23, 31

Rockets 37

Silicone 23, 77, 215-16

293

The 161

HULA HOOPS, AND PLAYFUL

RADAR.

PIGS

Skatole 273

Stench 231

Skepticism 278

Stevenson, Robert Louis 17

Skin cancer 103

Stinky Smelly Hold-Your-Nose

Skunk 217-20 Skunk Skreen 220

Stomachaches 95

Science 53

Slaked lime 32

Stone-washing 46

Slush 47, 50

Strange Case of Dr. Jekyll and Mr.

Smiley,

Sam 70-71

Smoke

flavoring 99

Hyde, The 17 Strauss, Levi

45^6

Smokescreen bombs 263

Stroke 138, 154

Snow White

Strychnine 239

86

Soap 223, 227

Sugar 113, 120, 132,279

Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium

121, 161

Suiso beer 247

benzoate 77

Sulfur 36-38, 41, 217-18, 227, 263-

bicarbonate 231, 244

65

carbonate 223

Sulfur dioxide 31, 62

chloride 161

Sulfuric acid 30-31, 40, 157, 228

erythorbate 99

hydrogen

sulfate

Sunlight 80

228

Superoxide 79

hydroxide 218-19, 228

Superoxide dismutase (sod), 79

lauryl sulfate 214

Surface tension 214, 223

99

nitrite

Surfactant 222-23

propionate 77

Swarts, Dr. 217

selenite 191

Swimming pool 229

silicate

224

Syphilis 165

sulfate

223

Syrian golden hamsters 201

sulfide

217

thiosulfate 158

Tagaloalagi 167

Sodom and Gomorrah 27-28 Soma 146

Tangerman, Albert 272

Souffle 152-53

Taoist philosophy 36

Soy 109, Soybean

117, oil

122-26

Tannic acid 70 Taste Research Foundation of

Chicago 89

138

Soy sauce 94

Tea 101-5

Spanish fly 141, 143-44

Tea capsules 104

Spectro-Chrome 251-54

Terephthalic acid 227

Sperm count 68 Sperm motility 68, 191

Testosterone 187-88, 201

Testicle coolers 68

Spiritualists 71

Tetraethyl lead 62

Spondylotherapy 237-38

Tetrahydrocannabinol 131

Stachyose 273

Tetrodotoxin 160-61

Starch 47, 49-50

Texarcana 24

£94

INDEX Therapeutic touch (tt) 255-57

Valencene 76

Thermaskin 66

Van Gogh, Vincent 208-1

Thibeau, Angele 276-77

Vanilla 74, 266

Thioacetate 219

Vanillin 74-75, 267

Thiocyanate 158

Verbascose 273

Thiol 219-20

Veronal 270

Through the Looking Glass 145

Vinegar 228

Thujone 210

Virgins 167

Tilton,

Robert 15

Visible

Spectrum Research

Institute

254

Tituba 149

266

Tocopherol 197

Vital force,

Tofu 100

Vitamin A, 82

Toilet-bowl cleaner 228

Vitamin

Tomato 106-9 Tomato juice 218

C

74, 80-82, 84-85,

99-101, 135, 267, 279

Tomatine 105

Vitamin

D

Vitamin

E

181, 252

80-85, 197-201

Tonations 253

Volcanic rocks 46-47

Trans-2-butene-l -thiol 218

Vomeronasal organ (vno) 207

Trichloroisocyanuronate 230

von von von von von

Triglycerides 90

Trinitrophenol 60

Tryptophan 31 Tsar Nicholas 155

Baeyer, Adolf 269

Bismarck, Otto 98 Guericke, Otto 33 Liebig, Justus 269

Mering, Joseph Dr. 270

Tuberculosis 153

Turns 181

Walnuts 139

Tupper, Earl 56

Warren, John Collins 184

Tupperware 56-57

Washing soda 223

Tyramine 154

Weiss, Ehrich 69 Wells, Horace, 183-85

ufos 259

Whey

Ultraviolet light 62-63, 103, 223,

White blood

Underwear 65-68 Upper-respiratory-tract infection

118

Witchcraft 148 Withering, William, 208

Wodehouse, P.G. 114

89

Urea 266-67 acid,

Urine

cells 16, 80,

Whitehead, Gordon 70-71

225-27

Uric

32, 128

269

38, 59, 122-24, 146, 151,

172-74, 177, 180,226,233,261-

Wohler, Friedrich 217, 266-67

Wool 67 Wooster, Bertie 114

Wormwood

70

Urokinase 103

X-rays 80

295

—

210

RADAR,

HULA HOOPS, AND PLAYFUL

PIGS

Yeast infection 66-67

Ziegler, Karl 56

Yerushalmi, Aharon 120

Zinc 30, 236

Yin and Yang 36-37

Zinc compounds, 88

Ypres 228

Zohner, Nathan 25

Yussopov, Prince 156

Zombie cucumber 160 Zombie powder 159-60 Zombies 159-61

Zeolites 222-23, 231, 233-34

296

—

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