Living mindfully : discovering authenticity through mindfulness coaching 9781119163220, 1119163226

Table of contents :
Content: Preface vii Acknowledgements x Introduction 1 Sarah 9 1 Mindfulness 10 2 Living Mindfully: A Five ]Week Programme 21 3 The Art of Orientation 30 4 The Inquiry Process 42 Owena 56 5 Moving Out of Automatic Pilot and Being More Aware of Our Bodies 57 Annaliese 73 6 Being Present in Mindfulness of the Breath and the Body in Movement 74 Sue 89 7 Staying Present and Dealing with Difficult Thoughts and Emotions 90 Catriona 101 8 Accepting and Letting Be 102 Amanda 109 9 Bringing it Together, Looking after Yourself, and Moving Forward 110 Angeline 127 10 Integrating Mindfulness and Coaching 128 Andrew 140 11 The TIME Programme: Development and Rationale 141 Maria 154 12 Authenticity and its Impact upon Confidence and Self ]Esteem 155 Stephen 166 13 Acceptance: Working with Negative Beliefs and Emotions 167 Melanie 179 14 Communication: Releasing Our Words to the Universe 180 Lynda 191 15 Planning the Way Forward: An Unfolding Journey 192 16 In Conclusion 202 Appendix 1 205 Appendix 2 207 Appendix 3: Further Reading 210 Appendix 4: Frequently Asked Questions 212 Index 217

Citation preview

Living Mindfully

Living Mindfully Discovering Authenticity through Mindfulness Coaching

Gary Heads

This edition first published 2017 © 2017 John Wiley & Sons, Ltd Registered Office John Wiley & Sons, Ltd, The Atrium, Southern Gate, Chichester, West Sussex, PO19 8SQ, UK Editorial Offices 350 Main Street, Malden, MA 02148‐5020, USA 9600 Garsington Road, Oxford, OX4 2DQ, UK The Atrium, Southern Gate, Chichester, West Sussex, PO19 8SQ, UK For details of our global editorial offices, for customer services, and for information about how to apply for permission to reuse the copyright material in this book please see our website at www.wiley.com/wiley‐blackwell. The right of Gary Heads to be identified as the author of this work has been asserted in accordance with the UK Copyright, Designs and Patents Act 1988. All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted, in any form or by any means, electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording or otherwise, except as permitted by the UK Copyright, Designs and Patents Act 1988, without the prior permission of the publisher. Wiley also publishes its books in a variety of electronic formats. Some content that appears in print may not be available in electronic books. Designations used by companies to distinguish their products are often claimed as trademarks. All brand names and product names used in this book are trade names, service marks, trademarks or registered trademarks of their respective owners. The publisher is not associated with any product or vendor mentioned in this book. Limit of Liability/Disclaimer of Warranty: While the publisher and author have used their best efforts in preparing this book, they make no representations or warranties with respect to the accuracy or completeness of the contents of this book and specifically disclaim any implied warranties of merchantability or fitness for a particular purpose. It is sold on the understanding that the publisher is not engaged in rendering professional services and neither the publisher nor the author shall be liable for damages arising herefrom. If professional advice or other expert assistance is required, the services of a competent professional should be sought. Library of Congress Catalog Number: 2016046266 Hardback ISBN: 9781119163268 Paperback ISBN: 9781119163251 A catalogue record for this book is available from the British Library. Cover image: © Andy Roberts/Getty Images, Inc. Set in 10/12pt Warnock by SPi Global, Pondicherry, India 10 9 8 7 6 5 4 3 2 1

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Contents Preface  vii Acknowledgements  x Introduction  1 Sarah  9 1 ­Mindfulness  10 2 Living Mindfully: A Five‐Week Programme  21 3 The Art of Orientation  30 4 The Inquiry Process  42 Owena  56 5 ­Moving Out of Automatic Pilot and Being More Aware of Our Bodies  57 Annaliese  73 6 ­Being Present in Mindfulness of the Breath and the Body in Movement  74 Sue  89 7 ­Staying Present and Dealing with Difficult Thoughts and Emotions  90 Catriona  101 8 ­Accepting and Letting Be  102

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Amanda  109   9 ­Bringing it Together, Looking after Yourself, and Moving Forward  110 Angeline  127 10 ­Integrating Mindfulness and Coaching  128 Andrew  140 11 ­The TIME Programme: Development and Rationale  141 Maria  154 12 ­Authenticity and its Impact upon Confidence and Self‐Esteem  155 Stephen  166 13 ­Acceptance: Working with Negative Beliefs and Emotions  167 Melanie  179 14 ­Communication: Releasing Our Words to the Universe  180 Lynda  191 15 ­Planning the Way Forward: An Unfolding Journey  192 16 In Conclusion  202 Appendix 1  205 Appendix 2  207 Appendix 3: Further Reading  210 Appendix 4: Frequently Asked Questions  212 Index  217

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Preface As the interest in mindfulness and learning to teach mindfulness‐based approaches continues to grow, the available information and pathways to teaching this approach will inevitably expand with it. The increasing attention that mindfulness is receiving in the media is fuelling a rapid rise in demand from the general public, especially those who suffer from psychological and physiological issues. This demand will place the spotlight of attention firmly on those that refer to themselves as mindfulness teachers/trainers, as well as those who deliver teacher‐ training programmes. This book does not set out to evaluate or validate existing training pathways, but rather to offer guidelines for teaching specific programmes, namely, the Living Mindfully Programme, and the mindfulness‐based coaching intervention, Training Individuals in Mindfulness and Excellence (TIME). The plethora of research papers currently available make impressive reading, and although this should be viewed with caution the evidence base is building in support of mindfulness‐based interventions. Yet with recommendations by the Mental Health Foundation (2010), the National Institute for Health & Clinical Excellence (NICE; 2010) and the Mindful Nation UK Report (2015), we are yet to see mindfulness offered freely throughout healthcare in the United Kingdom. However, for the past six years in County Durham in northeast England, Living Mindfully have delivered a mindfulness programme available to every resident in that county, accessible by referral from healthcare professionals, and commissioned by Public Health, County Durham Council. In that time 3,500 individuals have embraced the opportunity either by requesting referral or being offered the option of attending the programme. When I began my journey in 2005 to train as a mindfulness teacher it was always my intention to develop and deliver a mindfulness programme that was accessible to everyone, to ensure that a place on the programme

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was not dependent upon finance, but rather determined by need. That intention has become a reality, but the need for the programme was grossly underestimated, as were the challenges and the time required to make the service the success it is today. The experience gained from working with hundreds of groups has produced a wealth of information, both practical and insightful. This has influenced both the structure and delivery of the programme and enabled those engaged in teaching to develop their skills to a high standard. Working with vulnerable and at times challenging groups requires a great deal of care and compassion as well as ability. Being able to hold your group when difficulties arise is a skill that is gained only through experience. My own training pathway and that of those who work with me can only be described as excellent; however, with the greatest respect, it did not prepare us to work in this environment. Yet this is the very environment in which we need to be teaching, and it is here that mindfulness has impacted so positively and inspired our teachers in so many ways. The guidance offered here is an insight into not only teacher training, but also an understanding of what is required to provide a fully‐funded mindfulness service to the general public. The Living Mindfully programme is now an established and effective intervention that supports a whole community in their ongoing mindfulness practice. The success of this approach and the continuing research that demonstrates the positive impact upon those referred has led to numerous adaptations of the programme. These adaptations have included working in education, in the workplace, with the unemployed, in alcohol and drug rehabilitation, during pregnancy and with young carers. The integration of mindfulness and coaching as described in this book has also proven to be an inspiring and motivational approach, especially for those that find themselves either unemployed or at a crossroads in their lives. Through the development of the TIME programme mindfulness‐ based coaching has demonstrated its potential as a pivotal component in promoting positive change and in inspiring an authentic lifestyle. My vision is that in the future both mindfulness and mindfulness‐based coaching programmes will be accessible to all, simply by visiting a GP, healthcare professional, unemployment agency or as part of career guidance within education. However, to make that a reality those that commission services must have confidence not only in the efficacy of mindfulness, but also in those that deliver the service. The pages within this book are formulated from the dedication of teachers and participants alike. Whilst the programme has evolved over the years and continues to do so, the mindfulness practices remain the foundation of everything we teach. It is hoped that this book will encourage others to follow in our footsteps and embark on their journey as a

Preface

mindfulness teacher or will guide existing teachers and organizations in providing a similar mindfulness service in their area. It may, however, simply plant the seed of curiosity and a willingness to explore the possibility of introducing mindfulness into daily life.

­References Mental Health Foundation. (2010). Mindfulness Report, available at: http:// www.mentalhealth.org.uk/publications/be‐mindful‐report. Mindfulness–All Party Parliamentary Group (MAPPG). (2015). Mindful Nation UK, report available at: http://themindfulnessinitiative.org.uk/ images/reports/Mindfulness‐APPG‐Report_Mindful‐Nation‐UK_ Oct2015.pdf. National Institute for Health & Clinical Excellence (NICE). (2010). ‘Guideline on the Treatment and Management of Depression in Adults’, Guideline 90. National Collaborating Centre for Mental Health, London: British Psychological Society and Royal College of Psychiatrists.

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Acknowledgements It is a pleasure to acknowledge all those that have contributed in so many ways to making the initial idea for this book develop from a single thought to reality. It would be impossible to name everyone, but your contribution is not underestimated or appreciated any less if your name is missing. I would like to thank Judith Soulsby for her encouragement and support throughout my time as a mindfulness teacher, without her kind words and reassurance this book would not have been written. I am eternally grateful to all those at Living Mindfully who have motivated and inspired me to write this book, their dedication to teaching and their willingness to help others is etched throughout these pages. I would like to thank Bernadette Topham, Marnie Ramsey, Catherine Parker, and Catherine Richardson who commissioned the Living Mindfully and TIME programmes. Thanks to Melanie Mitchell who so skilfully guided our research. Thanks to Darren Reed at Wiley‐Blackwell for his support and belief in this project. Roshna Mohan, Nivetha Udayakumar, and Lyn Flight for their skill in taking the book through the processes of publication. Finally, I dedicate this book to my wife Kathleen for her support, endless patience, proof‐reading skills, and unwavering belief that I could complete this project. You underestimate how inspirational you can be.

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Introduction In 2005, as I left a meditation evening in my hometown of Newcastle upon Tyne a chance remark was to have a remarkable influence upon my life, and the lives of thousands of others. We had been practicing Transcendental Meditation (Wallace, 1970), which I had been incorporating into my day and finding useful. As I left the building that night a member of the group asked me if I had enjoyed the class; she ended the conversation by telling me that she had just discovered something called ‘mindfulness’ and that I should check it out. Upon investigation it seemed that the place that might answer my questions was situated in North Wales, The Centre for Mindfulness Research and Practice to be precise. A telephone conversation followed with a mindfulness teacher at the centre called Judith Soulsby; it appeared that the place to begin was to complete an eight‐week Mindfulness Based Stress Reduction programme (Kabat‐Zinn, 2013). As it was impractical to travel to North Wales each week, I chose the distance‐learning option and completed the programme. I followed the eight‐week course with a teacher development seven‐day retreat in North Wales, and at the end of that week my vision was clear: to teach mindfulness; to integrate mindfulness and coaching; and to develop an organization that could deliver mindfulness programmes. Throughout my time as a qualified coach I have always encouraged the individuals I work with to find what they are passionate about, and to follow that passion; this I believe is the path that can lead to authenticity, to life purpose, your gift to the world. This was my road map for an authentic journey, fuelled by passion and a desire for this particular work. In the words of Rumi: Everyone has been made for some particular work, and the desire for that work has been put in every heart. (Harvey, 1999)

Living Mindfully: Discovering Authenticity through Mindfulness Coaching, First Edition. Gary Heads. © 2017 John Wiley & Sons, Ltd. Published 2017 by John Wiley & Sons, Ltd.

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To make my objective a reality I made the decision in 2006 to immerse myself in mindfulness by completing an MSc in Mindfulness ‐based Approaches at Bangor University, and this decision proved to be a wise one. The next three years were spent not only studying, but also developing and delivering mindfulness‐based programmes, working predominately with the long‐term unemployed in partnership with Jobcentreplus, the employment agency within the Department of Work and Pensions. In 2009, I formed a social enterprise, Living Mindfully, with the aim of raising public awareness of the benefits of mindfulness‐based approaches by delivering mindfulness programmes, and mindfulness‐based coaching to individuals and groups of all ages. The development of the organization and the diversity of programmes it now delivers has expanded at a significant rate, and this period of rapid growth has enabled the company to keep pace with the tidal wave of interest in mindfulness that has emerged throughout the world.

­The Living Mindfully Programme In the first year of developing the Living Mindfully Programme, the Mental Health Foundation released a report that detailed recommendations for expanding mindfulness services throughout the United Kingdom. Within this report a survey of General Practitioners (GPs) and their attitude towards mindfulness‐based approaches provided insights that helped to shape the provision of information, education, and training of those healthcare professionals charged with referring clients to the programme. The survey indicated that in general GPs viewed mindfulness positively as a healthcare intervention; however, they rarely, if ever, referred their patients. The reason for this was judged to be the fact that mindfulness interventions where not widely available. It was, therefore, reasonable to assume that a mindfulness service covering a whole county would attract referrals from healthcare professionals once its availability was circulated. Although referrals were steady from the beginning, it soon became apparent that in order to build an established long‐term service a concentrated effort would be needed to educate referrers to the potential benefits of mindfulness, and the criteria for referring suitable patients. To this effect, a concerted period of promotion was embarked upon, including personal visits to health centres, Introduction to Mindfulness presentations, workshops, and an open invitation to healthcare professionals to attend an eight‐week mindfulness programme. This offer turned out to be pivotal to the success of the programme. The fact that many took up the offer of attending an eight‐week programme and developed a personal mindfulness practice proved to be a key factor in

Introduction

establishing the service. Importantly, they gained a real insight into the nature of the programme and into the commitment and time required. Attending the programme not only informed their decision‐making when assessing the suitability of their patients, but, as their feedback suggested, also impacted significantly on their own overall health. After an initial 12‐month period, the programme was commissioned by Public Health, Durham County Council, as an ongoing mindfulness service. One year later, Public Health at Darlington Borough Council also commissioned the service. In the subsequent years the Living Mindfully Programme has been commissioned and delivered to a wide‐ranging client base; the following list demonstrates the diversity of interest: public sector staff under potential threat of redundancy; local authority departments, to address workplace stress; police officers, to develop resilience when dealing with stressful situations; university students, to assist with exam pressure; young carers; long‐term unemployed; those recovering from drug and alcohol addiction; pregnancy and beyond, for clients at risk of post‐natal depression; trainee radiographers, to develop resilience and reduce potential burnout; schoolteachers, to address workplace stress; family nurse practitioners; mental health practitioners and coaches; men’s support groups; veterans support groups; vulnerable and at risk young people. In 2015, the Living Mindfully Programme was subject to a research project funded by Public Health, County Durham, in conjunction with Northumbria University (Mitchell & Heads, 2015)

­Abstract One hundred and twelve women and 37 men, with an average age of 50 years were referred for mindfulness training with a range of chronic psychological issues. All participants completed the Warwick–Edinburgh Mental Well‐being Scale before and after the mindfulness‐training programme (Tennant et al., 2007). A significant overall effect of pre and post training was found and the difference was not related to a specific disorder. The results suggest that a ‘brief dose’ of mindfulness training

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can have a positive impact on measures of well‐being in a manner that is not related to patient characteristics. A follow‐up of 28 participants confirmed that participation in the Living Mindfully Programme significantly enhanced psychological well‐being immediately after training, and this benefit is maintained for up to four years after training. Continued practice of mindfulness meditation showed an insignificant relationship to well‐being scores at follow‐up. Qualitative data suggests that the Living Mindfully five‐week programme is an effective means of developing emotion regulation and psychological well‐being. The results emanating from this research are very much in line with the feedback received from participants not only upon completion of the programme, but also over a much longer period. Because of the extensive support provided, a community of what could be described as mindfulness graduates has emerged. The number of individuals registered on the Living Mindfully database is considerable, and growing. Many regularly attend practice sessions, monthly practice groups, silent days, and retreats, as well as corresponding via email or telephone to ask practice‐related questions. Although this level of support is time‐consuming and expensive, the results far outweigh any cost implications; without this facility many past participants feel their daily mindfulness practice would be compromised. With demand growing, the inevitable conundrum arises of how to build capacity and where to find mindfulness teachers trained to a level that will not only continue, but also enhance the delivery of the service. This proved initially to be a challenging proposition, but eventually teachers presented themselves and a core teaching team was created. They arrived by various means; some approached the company directly having completed training elsewhere, whilst others were past participants who had been inspired by their own experience to begin the journey of helping others to develop mindfulness skills. It was those individuals that had initially begun as participants that proved to be central to creating the shift towards not only delivering programmes, but also training mindfulness teachers. The creation of an in‐house training programme to provide comprehensive training and experience has proved to be a solid foundation for both pupil and teacher. The understanding and wisdom gained through this process has led to the development of the Mindfulness Practitioner Training Programme, a 12‐month training programme that began in September 2016. The training is intended for those wishing to teach the eight‐week Mindfulness‐based Stress Reduction Programme and the Living Mindfully Programme. After a year of research and inquiry the Mindfulness All‐Party Parliamentary Group published the Mindful Nation UK Report (2015). I  was delighted to be asked to contribute to this groundbreaking and potentially influential publication. The contents of the report make

Introduction

interesting reading, and I would urge readers to study the findings; however, for the purposes of this book we will concentrate on access for GPs and the scaling up of mindfulness services in the United Kingdom. Contrary to the interest in mindfulness from both the general public and healthcare professionals, access to mindfulness‐based interventions remains extremely limited. Although 72% of GPs wish to refer patients, only one in five actually has access to a programme in their area (Crane & Kuyken, 2012). Several NHS Trusts have developed mindfulness programmes; however, they are relatively small scale in terms of patient numbers and the only other option open to individuals is to attend a private programme and self‐fund. If we look at these outcomes compared with the delivery of the Living Mindfully Programme in County Durham we can immediately see the effect of a fully commissioned mindfulness service. In the last five years over two hundred programmes have been delivered, with in excess of three thousand places allocated to participants. Throughout this intense period of both establishing and delivering a mindfulness service I have come to realise that investing in and maintaining high standards of teaching and ongoing training, although essential, are only one part of creating a fully functioning service. In the embryonic stages of development it soon became apparent that the volume of correspondence, reporting, and course administration would require additional non‐teaching staff and the development of bespoke software. Producing workbooks, CDs, recordings, and constant website updates on this scale is both time consuming and costly. This level of investment and organization would be required whether the service was part of the NHS or delivered by a social enterprise or private company. It is hoped that our expertise and experience can be of assistance in fulfilling the recommendations set out in recent publications, that in the future access to mindfulness‐based interventions are available to all those that request a referral from healthcare professionals. The guidance within these pages is offered to those that wish to teach and as a model to expanding mindfulness into mainstream healthcare. It is presented not as a definitive solution, but rather as a tried‐and‐tested option.

­ raining Individuals in Mindfulness T and Excellence In addition to the Living Mindfully Programme this book also includes details of Training Individuals in Mindfulness and Excellence (TIME), a mindfulness‐based coaching programme that can be delivered in conjunction with the mindfulness five‐week programme. TIME has been

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used as a stand‐alone four‐week programme, as well as being delivered before or after the Living Mindfully Programme. A specialist employment team seconded from Jobcentreplus originally commissioned the TIME programme, the remit being to address psychological issues that were impacting upon their client’s abilities to find employment. The subsequent three‐year pilot also formed the basis of my MSc thesis at The Centre for Mindfulness, University of Wales Bangor (Heads, 2011). In terms of positive outcomes regarding employment, the programme was a resounding success, even warranting praise in the House of Commons (2012). However, it was within the research that the future direction of the programme was to be found. The aim of the study was to examine the effects of a mindfulness‐based coaching programme on quality of life, motivation, and self‐esteem. The quality of life and motivation measures showed a significant increase, however, self‐esteem levels decreased. This perhaps suggests a certain degree of acceptance and authenticity associated with participating in a mindfulness intervention, the fact that previous studies (Carson & Langer, 2006) had found a positive impact when fostering acceptance and authenticity made the results worthy of further investigation. The link between mindfulness and authenticity is in my opinion a fascinating and potentially transformational concept; the suggestion that mindfully informed choices are less influenced by the ego and are linked to outcomes characterized by low ego involvement (Brown & Ryan, 2003) seemed to be evident in the choices and actions taken by those participating in the TIME programme. Discovering authenticity through mindfulness‐based coaching can perhaps provide a step beyond the ego‐driven choices we make that dictate life’s path, the conditioning, judgements, and negativity that can cloud our thinking and keep us locked in an automatic and unfulfilled existence. The emergence of the true self can be spawned by acceptance and authenticity, bringing forth unlimited possibilities, cultivating creativity, intention, and passion. It is through mindfulness that we can become aware of thoughts, emotions, feelings, physical sensations, behaviours, and speech. By exploring our direction in life with self‐awareness we open to the possibility of following an authentic path; this is the essence of the TIME programme. The programme delivered over four weeks consists of one, four‐hour session per week, and is taught in a group format. This allows participants time for reflection, and to practice exercises and techniques week by week as the programme unfolds. The sessions are as follows: Week 1 Confidence and Self‐esteem; Week 2 Negative Beliefs and Emotions; Week 3 Communication; Week 4 Planning the way forward.

Introduction

The combination of mindfulness and coaching can be transformational for many participants; those individuals that have experienced the Living Mindfully and TIME programmes are best placed to describe the shift into authenticity and the new‐found purpose they have experienced. Therefore, at the beginning of each chapter you will find a testimonial describing the impact that attending the programmes have had upon individual lives. The words are both heartfelt and inspirational, and a testimony to the ability of human beings to instigate positive change. It is hoped that the contents of this book will go some way to influencing those that commission services to consider the potential of mindfulness and mindfulness‐based coaching as an option. If the Living Mindfully and TIME programmes described in these chapters encourages participants, teachers, and trainers to step forward and become the catalyst for a more intuitive and authentic way of life, then the time taken to write these words will have been well spent.

­References Brown, K. W., & Ryan, R. M. (2003). The benefits of being present: mindfulness and its role in psychological well‐being. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 84, 822–848. Carson, S. H., & Langer, E. J. (2006). Mindfulness and self‐acceptance. Journal of Rational‐Emotive & Cognitive‐Behavior Therapy, 24, 29–43. Centre for Mindfulness Research and Practice, Bangor University, see at: http://www.bangor.ac.uk/mindfulness. Crane, R. S., & Kuyken, W. (2012). The implementation of mindfulness‐ based cognitive therapy: learning from the UK Health Service experience. Mindfulness, 4, 246–254. Harvey, A. (1999). Teachings of Rumi. Boulder, CO: Shambhala Publications. Heads, G. (2011). The effects of a mindfulness‐based intervention with long‐term unemployed (Unpublished MSc thesis), School of Psychology, University of Wales Bangor, see at: https://www.bangor.ac.uk/ mindfulness/mastersresearch.php.en. House of Commons. (2012). Debate on Mindfulness, see at: http://www. theyworkforyou.com/debates/?id=2012‐12‐04a.840.0. Kabat‐Zinn, J. (2013). Full catastrophe living: how to cope with stress, pain and illness using mindfulness meditation, rev. edn. London: Hachette. Mental Health Foundation. (2010). Mindfulness Report, see at: http://www. mentalhealth.org.uk/publications/be‐mindful‐report. Mindfulness‐All Party Parliamentary Group (MAPPG). (2015). Mindful Nation UK, report, see at: www.themindfulnessinitiative.org.uk.

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Mitchell, M., & Heads, G. J. (2015). Staying well: a follow up of a 5‐week mindfulness‐based stress reduction programme for a range of psychological issues. Community Mental Health Journal, 51(8), 897–902. doi: 10.1007/s10597‐014‐9825‐5. Tennant, R., Hiller, L., Fishwick, R., Platt, S., Joseph, S., Weich, S., Parkinson, J., Secker, J., & Stewart‐Brown, S. (2007). The Warwick–Edinburgh Mental Well‐being Scale (WEMWBS): development and UK validation. Health and Quality of Life Outcomes, 5, 63, accessed at: http://www.hqlo.com/ content/5/1/63. Wallace, R. K. (1970). Physiological effects of transcendental meditation. Science, 167(3926), 1751–1754.

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Sarah Mindfulness has opened up a whole new world of possibilities; it woke me up to life. I came from a very poor and tragic place, I was in a women’s refuge, isolated and very alone, with poor self‐esteem. I found it difficult just to leave the refuge, felt very ashamed and saw no future in my life. I just felt doomed to failure, and expected life to be bleak and full of disasters. Mindfulness connected me back with my emotions and thoughts, showed me why I felt the way I did and why I think the way I did. I stopped rejecting myself, started listening to needs, emotions, and myself, and started the walk back to being me again. It helped to ground me, to realize what was important in life, and helped with anxieties so that I could face people and the world again and stop being afraid of what ‘might’ be ‘out there’. I learned to change my perceptions of life. Where once I would have left my home on a windy, rain‐swept day thinking ‘what a miserable day’, I now started to appreciate the rainy days, and could see these as beautiful in their own way and quite essential. This is a metaphor also for how I started seeing my emotions and thoughts. We often do not like having what we perceive as negative thoughts and emotions, and as such fight them or ignore them; this is what causes conflicts and blocks us from what we truly are, need, and can be in life. Mindfulness is about being quiet and paying attention to this voice within. I have recently undergone training in counselling and psychotherapy techniques, and have also started work with a local mental health charity helping to support other people on their road to recovery. I am also training in art at university, perhaps combining art and counselling as a therapy.

Living Mindfully: Discovering Authenticity through Mindfulness Coaching, First Edition. Gary Heads. © 2017 John Wiley & Sons, Ltd. Published 2017 by John Wiley & Sons, Ltd.

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1 ­Mindfulness I remember Sarah arriving for the first week of her programme; she ­portrayed both vulnerability and determination in those early moments. Arriving had obviously been a great effort and was subject to great deliberation. As she sat in her chair alongside eleven other participants, her fragility played out by lowering her eyes as if to explore in every detail the contours and patterns of the floor. To arrive at Week 1 of the Living Mindfully Programme had clearly been a difficult journey. The words that Sarah uses to describe how mindfulness has impacted upon her life may perhaps hold the key to what mindfulness actually is. Phrases such as ‘opening up a whole new world of possibilities’, and ‘mindfulness woke me up to life’ signify some kind of transition or emergence from a state of unawareness, and a certain degree of hopelessness. In relation to Sarah’s description, it is useful to reflect on Ellen Langer’s (1989) evaluation that mindfulness could be depicted as the opposite of mindlessness, where attention is focused elsewhere and behaviour is automatic, without any awareness of one’s actions, including a preoccupation with memories, plans, or worries. The word mindfulness is an English translation of the Pali word sati meaning awareness or skilful attentiveness (Gair & Karunatillake, 1998). Over 2,500 years ago, Pali would have been the language used by the Buddha when he began to teach the Four Noble Truths and the Noble Eightfold Path. If we study these teachings and familiarise ourselves with Buddhist psychology, we will find mindfulness as a core component. Within the Buddha’s teachings there is a statement that is both wise and extremely thought‐provoking: that assertion is that suffering is a natural part of human existence (Bodhi, 2010). If we look more closely at this we discover that some of our suffering is existential, we are all subject to birth, sickness, old age, and death. However, we often find that difficulties in life are more personal and self‐imposed by nature, and can be influenced by past conditioning, present circumstances, or any number of Living Mindfully: Discovering Authenticity through Mindfulness Coaching, First Edition. Gary Heads. © 2017 John Wiley & Sons, Ltd. Published 2017 by John Wiley & Sons, Ltd.

­Mindfulnes

interweaving factors. If we learn through mindfulness to relate to positive, negative, or neutral experiences with less reactivity, we may then lessen the impact of those difficulties, especially those that are tinted with automated, judgemental, and critical thinking. Throughout the wealth of research, books, and articles relating to mindfulness the words ‘awareness’ and ‘attention’ are scattered like leaves on a blustery autumn day. Explanations of what mindfulness is are in abundance, but for the sake of argument the following has been chosen for its clarity, and simplicity: Mindfulness is an open and receptive awareness of, and attention to, what is taking place in the present. (Brown & Ryan, 2003) This moment‐by‐moment awareness involves paying careful attention to our thoughts, feelings, emotions, and bodily sensations in an accepting and non‐judgemental way. So many of our experiences can be viewed through the lens of reactivity, driven by conditioning and habitual patterns learned from previous experiences as we move through life. We can find ourselves living on autopilot, or lost in daydreaming as we resist the here and now, perhaps disengaging from reality to search for something deemed to be more interesting. Both can be said to be distractions from the actuality of the present moment, and are the opposite of mindfulness (Germer, Siegel, & Fulton, 2013). Making a choice to cultivate the skill of mindfulness through regular practice is an option that is open to anyone; however, it does require an element of discipline and it can be challenging. The good news is that it is not something to acquire, but rather something to rekindle, it is already within us, and it is part of being human. There are moments in life when clarity and awareness arise naturally, a fleeting glimpse of what it is like to be fully conscious, completely aware of what is presenting itself in the moment. These moments unfortunately are short‐lived and are soon replaced by daydreaming, stories, remembering, or imagining. Introducing mindfulness offers the prospect of learning to expand and sustain periods of awareness; the meditations that are practised regularly can promote a gentle exploration of what is actually happening in each moment, rather than what may be being projected as reality. This may facilitate the unravelling of familiar patterns and past conditioning that may have locked in unawareness, thus creating an ignorance of the present moment. If practice is sustained then a wider perspective of what is actually ­happening can be established, including a realization that thoughts about the past or future are simply memories or projections, and the content of those thoughts are not manifesting in this moment. This stance of ­stepping back and observing can bring a more responsive approach when

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attending to arising thoughts, sensations, and emotions; it can help to create choices, rather than the automatic reactions that sometimes ­trigger as experiences unfold. The attitudes brought to mindfulness practice are of great importance. This is emphasized by Jon Kabat‐Zinn, who suggests that the significance of the seven attitudinal factors of mindfulness constitute the pillars of mindfulness practice, and should not be underestimated ­ (Kabat‐Zinn, 1990). It is, therefore, worth taking a moment to reflect on these in more detail.

­Non‐judging It is perhaps fitting that non‐judging is listed here first, as navigating our way through the judging mind can be a real challenge. How often do we find ourselves reacting harshly and judging our experience? It can feel like the actuality of the moment is being experienced through layers of ideas, opinions, likes, dislikes, good or bad, so that ­everything seems tainted, or snap decisions are made based on past experiences. The judgemental mind can sometimes dominate our thinking to the extent that we become anxious or struggle to cope, pushing away unwanted thoughts and feelings. To ‘be with’ our unfolding experience without judging requires a more compassionate and kindly attitude, a willingness to understand what is unfolding. Can we take the role of an impartial observer to our experience in each moment, whatever it happens to be? Not making a positive or negative evaluation of what we are seeing, feeling, thinking, but simply watching it. If non‐judgemental awareness can be cultivated, then the arising of clarity and wisdom will hold the authenticity of the moment.

­Patience To be fully engaged in the present moment requires a great deal of patience, the moment cannot be hurried along to something more interesting, no matter how hard the goal is perused. When the attention is focused on the breath in mindfulness practice the mind will naturally wander away, venturing into the past or future, or caught up in worries or planning, as if it has lost patience with the breath, and needs to find a more stimulating topic. Just as the attention is returned to the breath, time after time, so awareness of what is unfolding right now is returned again, and again. If the skill of patience is to be developed, it will require perseverance, curiosity, acceptance, and an arising

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of wisdom, an understanding that everything must, and will, unfold and develop in its own time.

­Beginner’s Mind Bringing beginner’s mind to mindfulness practice requires that we view our experience as if for the very first time. Often in life we cloud our view of events by bringing our past experiences, beliefs, and habitual thinking to help us understand what is happening, rather than seeing things as they actually are. It is helpful to remind ourselves that every moment is a brand new moment that we have not witnessed before. Are we able to suspend judgements, opinions, and perceptions that arise, as well as our tendency to have a closed mind, in favour of exploring each moment with fresh eyes? Instead of ‘knowing’ and pre‐empting the content of the moment, can we just allow the ‘don’t know’ mind to take residence in the mystery that sits in each unfolding moment? In the mind of an expert there are limited possibilities, however, in beginners mind the possibilities are endless.

­Trust This is perhaps a difficult attitude to describe in words, as it is a very intuitive and a felt sense of trusting one’s own experience. If the grip of judgemental thinking can be loosened, then a degree of autonomy, ­liberation, and resourcefulness may arise. Trusting that learning to be mindful is a process, and that the natural wisdom of the body and mind can be relied upon, just like the flow of the in‐breath and the out‐breath, can cultivate an attitude of trust in ourselves and in our abilities.

­Non‐striving In meditation there is nothing to achieve, no end result, we are simply paying attention to the arising of our experience from one moment to the next. How different this attitude is to how we tend to function in today’s result‐driven society. We rarely do anything that does not have a purpose or is not aimed at achieving a goal or helping us to reach a destination. Letting go of striving and allowing things to be as they are without any expectations is both challenging and liberating. The attitude of non‐ striving or non‐doing requires being with whatever is arising without the need to change or fix, not trying to get somewhere else, but rather being with the experience.

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­Acceptance It is often said that to truly change you must first accept yourself as you are right now, so an attitude of kindness and compassion towards oneself would seem to be imperative if we are to bring acceptance to our mindfulness practice and daily lives. Bringing acceptance to one’s experience is a very positive and potentially transformational act. It is not resignation, accepting things just as they are, even if that is contrary to how we would like them to be, is a wise course of action, an action that creates choices. There are many things in life that are very hard to accept, yet from a standpoint of acceptance can come the first steps of action, recovery, or moving on.

­Letting Go Our inclination to attach to pleasant experiences and push away unpleasant ones can be a very automatic reaction; the attitude of letting go is the opposite of this tendency of clinging or grasping. By allowing ourselves to let go of thoughts and feelings that arise, whether we experience them as pleasant or unpleasant, and endeavouring instead to observe them as they arrive and leave is a significant practice. It holds the potential for developing the ability to avoid being caught in attachment or aversion, and see clearly what is present. Cultivating the seven attitudes of mindfulness in meditation practice and in daily life requires incorporating additional attitudes to help s­ ustain motivation and commitment on this challenging journey of personal insight. There will be many setbacks and moments of despair and frustration along the way, and it is important to hold these experiences in a vessel filled with kindness and compassion, and realise that these too are simply an experience arising in this moment.

­Mindfulness Interventions Over the past five years more than three thousand people have attended the Living Mindfully Programme, all have been referred by a healthcare professional to help with a variety of psychological and physiological issues. However, without the pioneering work undertaken by Jon Kabat‐ Zinn it could be argued that the progress made in the mindfulness field would not be where it is today. Since the inception in 1979 of Mindfulness‐ based Stress Reduction (MBSR), the availability and diversity of mindfulness programmes has expanded beyond all expectations. MBSR was originally used in a behavioural medicine setting for patients with chronic

­Mindfulnes

pain and stress‐related disorders, where the initial research into the effectiveness of the programme showed significant reductions in pain, anxiety, depression and self‐reported medical symptoms (Kabat‐Zinn, Lipworth, & Burney, 1985). The core curriculum of MBSR was later incorporated into Mindfulness‐based Cognitive Therapy (MBCT) as an adaptation for preventing relapse in adults with previous episodes of depression (Segal, Williams, & Teasdale, 2002). There are other therapeutic approaches that incorporate mindfulness training, notably Dialectical Behaviour Therapy, a treatment for borderline personality disorder (Linehan, 1993), and Acceptance and Commitment Therapy, used predominantly for reducing anxiety (Hayes, Strosahl, & Wilson, 1999). It is important to note that although reference here predominantly concerns participants who have been referred by a healthcare professional, learning mindfulness skills is not purely the domain of healthcare. In recent years we have seen the evolution of mindfulness in the workplace, with Google’s innovative (Kelly, 2012) ‘search inside yourself ’ mindfulness programme perhaps leading the way. Conversely, if a list of companies now offering mindfulness for staff worldwide were to be ­compiled that list would be substantial. Leadership programmes, mindfulness coaching, and, more recently, education are all exciting areas of development that would not just benefit the individual, but perhaps hold the potential to influence society as a whole. It is not surprising given the plethora of research suggesting that mindfulness enhances focus, concentration, decision‐making, memory, as well as overall mental and physical well‐being, that both individuals and organizations should show an interest (Dunn, Hartigan, & Mikulas, 1999). The importance of establishing research around mindfulness‐based programmes is not in question; however, the experiential nature of these programmes and the unfolding journey that participants embark upon can be difficult to express in words or analysis. It is not uncommon for participants to describe their reason for continuing to practice mindfulness as purely intuitive, a feeling that it is important. They talk about making wiser choices in life, and creating space in which to respond ­skilfully to experiences. This is often referred to as using the ‘wise mind’ or, as described by Joseph Goldstein, practising mindfulness can be ‘the gateway to wisdom’ (Goldstein, 2013). This arising of wisdom and insightfulness is also evident in the comments made by participants on feedback forms at the end of a programme. Collecting information from the groups we work with allows us to understand the unfolding rationale and the experiential nature of this type of training. If we can gather both qualitative and quantitative data wherever possible this information can guide the development of existing and future interventions in this ­growing but embryonic field.

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­Emotion Regulation The relationship between mindfulness and emotions and the regulation of emotions is an extensively researched area. It is generally acknowledged that mindfulness has an impact upon the awareness and labelling of emotions, on how we experience those emotions, and on the intensity of positive and negative emotions that are experienced (Roemer, Williston, & Rollins, 2015). Attending a mindfulness programme and learning the associated skills that emanate from regular practice can provide a two‐step pathway to enhancing the ability to regulate emotions. As thoughts and emotions have the capability to control our actions an increased awareness through mindfulness may be a beneficial aid to staying well. The two‐step pathway is as follows: 1) competence at noticing when thoughts are spiralling in an unwanted (depressive, anxious, stress‐based, etc.) direction; and 2) the ability to disconnect from the emotional ‘weight’ of thoughts and/ or from the cognitive ‘weight’ of emotions and direct attention to a neutral accepting observation of the physical sensations of the body. Developing the skill of ‘sitting with’ thoughts and feelings (and symptoms) in mindfulness practice is likely to broaden and expand the range of emotion‐regulation strategies that one has (Segal, Williams, & Teasdale, 2002).

­Mindfulness and its Effects upon Well‐being An ever increasing body of research continues to support the theory that attending a mindfulness programme can produce benefits in both physical and mental health, thereby improving overall well‐being (Carmody & Baer, 2008). If we agree that psychology conceptualizes ‘well‐being’ as autonomy, competence, self‐acceptance, personal growth, and relationships, then it is therefore plausible that mindfulness may impact upon emotion regulation by increasing one’s ability to observe and accept ­cognitive and affective events by learning to detach from them. If the attention is gently returned to the present state of the body and the breath, then the impact upon psychological well‐being may well be positive. The results from this could include increased feelings of competence, and an ability to ‘stay with’ unpleasant mental events and sensations and reduce ‘experiential avoidance’. If an awareness of recurring themes and images emerges, then this may lead to a degree of self‐acceptance,

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a self that endures beyond the temporary ‘weather’ of passing emotional states and thoughts (Segal, Williams, & Teasdale, 2002). Incorporating mindfulness into daily life can unlock the complex nature of our conditioning and habitual thinking, and allow the discovery of a more authentic self. This may create a shift into what we perceive as motivating and rewarding, such as personal goals, values, self‐improvement, career, and relationships. It may also instigate a new approach to what is actually important, based on authenticity, intuition, and compassion, rather than on necessity or need. It is this unfolding process that makes mindfulness and coaching such an intriguing proposition. With this in mind, it is interesting to read the comments from participants who have completed the Living Mindfully Programme and have sustained a mindfulness practice for some time. The comments have been coded using the categories autonomy, competence, self‐acceptance, personal growth, and relationships. The comments were collected as part of a research evaluation of the Living Mindfully Programme over a four‐year period (Mitchell & Heads, 2015).

­Autonomy The comments in this section mirror to some degree the definition of autonomy, which is defined as independence or freedom, and an ability to self‐govern. The individuals here appear to be exercising mindfulness as a way of managing symptoms, patterns of thinking, feelings, and behaving: ‘I make wiser choices as a result of my mindfulness practice.’ ‘(I make a) conscious effort to slow down, live in the moment.’ ‘I would just like to say that mindfulness has changed my life for the better. I am proof that this programme can be a healer for ­anyone suffering.’ ‘I am more aware of the onset of anxiety and likely to do something about it. I prioritize my well being. I am more confidant and relaxed and less likely to dwell on past events or fret over current ones. When I do become anxious I feel able to cope with it. I have had no further bouts of depression.’

­Competence The following observations relate to the ability to self‐soothe using mindfulness and continued plans to practice as a means of effective, on‐ going self‐care:

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‘It seems to be helpful when I am in a downward slope.’ ‘My practice is part of my daily life. It is important to me as it helps me slow down which cultivates awareness and presence.’ ‘I believe I have survived a rather painful transition in my life, and the mindfulness programme came along at just the right time. I am a happier functioning human being, and feel more at ease with my body and myself.’ ‘The programme saved me when I was feeling desperate. I am more focused and can relate to my mindfulness practice in stressful situations.’

­Self‐acceptance ‘Sitting with’ and being present with experiences, just as they are, can create a growing sense of ‘self ’ that endures beyond thoughts, emotions, and sensations. Participants often report a process of getting to know oneself, exploring preferences, and intuitive reactions to people, situations, and experiences. This may well lead to developing more confidence in life choices, a positive outlook, and a general feeling of being able to cope with life in a more efficient way. ‘I am more aware of things that may be affecting my mood such as unhelpful thoughts.’ ‘I am more likely to reflect and then respond to a difficult situation rather than a sharp reaction that I would regret later.’

­Personal Growth Responses in this category are frequently related to developing compassion not only towards oneself, but also towards others. A sense of gratitude, values, and a positive approach to personal goals is also evident: ‘Mindfulness enabled me to recover from a very stressful working life. It demonstrated to me that practising mindfulness could bring balance into my life.’ ‘It has been a very positive experience, attending the programme has enabled me to cope and manage my life with a solid sense of self‐awareness.’ ‘I have found attending the programme and learning mindfulness to be extremely beneficial, my practice is now an integral part of my life.’

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‘When I first started my mindfulness course I was in a very difficult place, I was depressed, and had very low self‐esteem. I could not sit still as my mind was constantly racing, causing me distress and anxiety. Learning how to be still and paying attention to my breath has allowed me to slow down. Eventually I began to see positive elements of my life, and accept myself. This was my starting point for self‐development.’

­Personal Relationships ‘I incorporate mindfulness into my daily life, its my first task in the morning. I feel very good, positive, optimistic, relaxed most of the time, and happy in my relationship.’ The participant’s comments suggest that mindfulness practice has a positive impact upon well‐being, and also seems to have a life‐enhancing effect regardless of the psychological or physiological issues the individual may have. It could perhaps be described as a deeper understanding of the authentic self, a more intuitive approach to life’s choices. It is not uncommon for participants to make major transitions in their lives after a period of mindfulness practice. These have included a change in direction around career, sometimes returning to a profession or following a vocation previously discarded. It could be a change of environment, or a more positive approach to health, relationships, or just life in general. It might be that by bringing acceptance and kindness to oneself, and to wherever we happen to be in our lives brings a new‐found sense of optimism, and a willingness to move forward with curiosity and a degree of confidence. However it may also produce an intuitive sense that it is time to make changes, to begin a journey that is a truer reflection of who we are. Sometimes those changes are not immediately obvious; the first steps have been taken but the path is unclear. It is precisely this situation that suggests that the integration of mindfulness and coaching holds great promise.

­References Bodhi, B. (2010). The noble eightfold path: The way to the end of suffering. Kandy: Buddhist Publication Society. Brown, K. W., & Ryan, R. M. (2003). The benefits of being present: mindfulness and its role in psychological well‐being. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 84(4), 822.

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Carmody, J., & Baer, R. A. (2008). Relationships between mindfulness practice and levels of mindfulness, medical and psychological symptoms and well‐being in a mindfulness‐based stress reduction program. Journal of Behavioral Medicine, 31(1), 23–33. Dunn, B. R., Hartigan, J. A., & Mikulas, W. L. (1999). Concentration and mindfulness meditations: unique forms of consciousness? Applied Psychophysiology and Biofeedback, 24(3), 147–165. Gair, J. W., & Karunatillake, W. S. (1998). A new course in reading Pali: Entering the word of the Buddha. Mumbai: Motilal Banarsidass Publications. Germer, C. K., Siegel, R. D., & Fulton, P. R. (Eds.). (2013). Mindfulness and psychotherapy. New York: Guilford Press. Goldstein, J. (2013). Mindfulness: A practical guide to awakening. Louisville, CO: Sounds True Inc. Hayes, S. C., Strosahl, K., & Wilson, K. G. (1999). Acceptance and commitment therapy. New York: Guildford Press. Kabat‐Zinn, J. (1990). Full catastrophe living: Using the wisdom of your body and mind to face stress, pain and illness. New York: Delacorte. Kabat‐Zinn, J., Lipworth, L., & Burney, R. (1985). The clinical use of mindfulness meditation for the self‐regulation of chronic pain. Journal of Behavioral Medicine, 8, 63–190. Kelly, C. (2012). OK, Google, take a deep breath. New York Times, p. BU1. Langer, E. J. (1989). Mindfulness. Cambridge, MA: Da Capo Press. Linehan, M. M. (1993). Cognitive‐behavioral treatment of borderline personality disorder. New York: Guildford Press. Mitchell, M., & Heads, G. J. (2015). Staying well: A follow up of a 5‐week Mindfulness‐based Stress Reduction programme for a range of psychological issues. Community Mental Health Journal, 51(8), 897–902. doi: 10.1007/s10597-014-9825-5. Roemer, L., Williston, S. K., & Rollins, L. G. (2015). Mindfulness and emotion regulation. Current Opinion in Psychology, 3, 52–57. Segal, Z. V., Williams, J. M. G., & Teasdale, J. D. (2002). Mindfulness‐based cognitive therapy for depression: A new approach to relapse prevention. New York: Guildford Press.

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2 Living Mindfully A Five‐Week Programme The Living Mindfully Programme was developed in 2009 and it would not be inappropriate to suggest that it took its inspiration from the well‐ established eight‐week Mindfulness‐Based Stress Reduction (MBSR) programme developed by Jon Kabat‐Zinn (1990). Since its inception in 1979 there have been numerous research evaluations of the eight‐week MBSR programme, with the general consensus being that there are potentially substantial benefits from attending, especially with regard to  stress, anxiety, depression, and chronic pain (Grossman, Niemann, Schmidt, & Walsh, 2004). The MBSR programme was designed to allow sufficient time for participants to learn the principles and develop the skills associated with mindfulness, that is, eight weekly sessions of 2½ hours each, plus a 6‐hour silent practice day during Week 6. This all‐day session requires participants to remain in silence as they are guided through mindfulness practices. In the weekly sessions participants meet to practice mindfulness meditation, which includes a body scan, mindful movement, walking, and sitting practice. They are asked to practice out­ side the sessions with a requirement of 45 minutes per day, six days per week. The results from the home practice are discussed in the session alongside discussions relating to stress and coping (Baer, 2003). For some, depending upon their current circumstances, an eight‐week MBSR programme in its current format may not be sustainable. This could include those recovering from illness but still requiring treatment on a regular basis, or those considering attending to address workplace stress and anxiety, who may find that their already overcommitted sched­ ule makes attending eight sessions prohibitive. We could perhaps also include students and carers in this category. When you add the 45‐minute home practice element to the equation, this can be a significant reason for some potential participants declining the opportunity to attend. The concern around being able to commit fully to the programme was indeed highlighted in 2008 in a clinical trial of the eight‐week MBSR, when of a Living Mindfully: Discovering Authenticity through Mindfulness Coaching, First Edition. Gary Heads. © 2017 John Wiley & Sons, Ltd. Published 2017 by John Wiley & Sons, Ltd.

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potential 131 participants contacted by the recruiter 45% cited time required as their reason for not attending (Carmody & Baer, 2008). The question of time commitment to MBSR can be a complex issue. It is the author’s opinion that the eight‐week programme is the corner­ stone of beginning the journey to teach mindfulness, and in this context adaptations should not be considered. However, as mindfulness grows in popularity adaptations will be inevitable; this may well be driven by soci­ eties demands upon our time, but also by financial restraints of those who commission mindfulness in healthcare and beyond. It is interesting to note that a number of studies have been conducted evaluating programmes that vary from the standard MBSR format; these have included reductions in the number of sessions, session length, and the amount of home practice allocated to participants. In keeping with the evaluation of the Living Mindfully Programme (Mitchell & Heads, 2015), the results found no evidence to suggest that these variations were less effective, and advocating that for those participants with a lesser time commitment adaptations of MBSR may be a crucial factor in their willingness to participate (Carmody & Baer, 2009). The decision to design a five‐week mindfulness programme was born out of necessity rather than a desire to produce a condensed version of MBSR. The mindfulness‐based coaching programme Training Individuals in Mindfulness and Excellence (TIME) (see Chapter  11), evolved when Derwentside Employment Team (DET), a specialist unit seconded from Jobcentre Plus and the National Health Service (NHS), requested training to address lack of confidence and self‐esteem in their long‐term unemployed clients. The development and delivery of the TIME programme proved to be not only effective but an inspiration to many of the 300 participants who attended, over 47% of whom had moved into employment or full‐time education within six months of completing the programme (Heads, 2011). When evaluating these results it is important to clarify that the participants who attended were eligible because they had registered with DET, and that their current circum­ stances were concurrent with the aim of the employment team. Those aims were to engage with all residents who were economically inactive, especially those who had not, or were reluctant to, engage with Jobcentreplus services. The priority groups included those in receipt of Incapacity Benefit for over 2 years, ex‐offenders, and lone parents. Although a large proportion of attendees made significant progress, some appeared to have multiple barriers to returning to work, including high levels of anxiety, stress, panic disorder, and depression. Many of these psychological issues were long‐standing, severely impacting upon their confidence, self‐esteem, and motivation, which had proved to be a recipe for hopelessness and despair. This discovery was not unexpected

Living Mindfully: A Five-Week Programme

and had, indeed, been identified as a major factor when encouraging those that find themselves unemployed to attend training. The longer a person is unemployed the more susceptible he or she becomes to the embedding of negative attitudes and beliefs, especially with regard to perceptions of self, sense of self, and one’s position in society, which are said to be the most difficult barriers to overcome when offering unem­ ployed clients the opportunity to learn new skills (Flude, 2000). The reluctance to take up training places may not have been helped by the content of training pathways being predominately founded on basic skills, as the social stigma associated with this could well hinder participation. The need for an intervention to assist those clients suffering from ­mental health issues was evident, and due to the encouraging feedback from clients mindfulness was proposed as the training of choice. Although there was an eagerness to pilot a mindfulness programme, there was also a reluctance to commission an eight‐week programme based not only on funding, but also on commitment from participants. This was founded on historical data gathered from other training initia­ tives that had been offered to long‐term unemployed clients, although none had included mindfulness. The innovation of DET is to be com­ mended, as there were no guidelines to follow, no research with this population to support the proposal, just qualitative research gathered with feedback forms at the end of each TIME programme. After consul­ tation it was decided to pilot a five‐week mindfulness programme, based purely on client feedback and a sense that an alternative approach to mainstream training initiatives was needed. The pilot ran for three years with 53% of the original 300 choosing to attend. The feedback collected by DET confirmed that the pro­ gramme had impacted upon their clients’ ability to cope with anxiety, panic disorder, and stress, especially when faced with stressful situa­ tions. This had subsequently improved confidence and motivation ­levels. The pilot ended when DET disbanded after its funding period concluded. Although the programme ceased at that point, the impact that mindfulness had made on everyone involved was to be far reach­ ing. When the recruitment process first began a decision made by Bernadette Topham, who was team manager, that her whole team should undertake the Living Mindfully Programme proved to be very significant. This allowed them to fully understand the concept not by reading about it, but by actually experiencing it. What better way to ascertain a client’s suitability for the programme than by referring to your own experience. The effects of this insightful decision were to be influential in establishing the Living Mindfully Programme in healthcare and beyond in the years to come.

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It soon became apparent that any expansion of the programme would come from the seeds planted in the delivery of the pilot rather than by trying to explain or persuade those that fund and commission our health­ care services to integrate mindfulness. This was indeed the case, as those NHS staff that had completed the programme returned to the Primary Care Trust (PCT) in Durham. If we read the quote below from Bernadette Topham’s report (2012), we get a sense of the impact that attending the programme had on the DET team: My team of advisers also underwent this programme as I wanted them to fully understand the concept and gain a more rounded understanding of their clients. However, I would like to make the comment and observation that as a result of this programme their ability to cope with stressful situations and their general outlook, and enthusiasm for the role of employment adviser was greatly enhanced. It was the influence of those NHS staff returning to their posts that ­created the possibility of introducing mindfulness as a referral only ser­ vice throughout County Durham. An initial one‐year pilot commissioned by the PCT, led to the Living Mindfully Programme establishing itself as an integral part of healthcare in the county. It continues to this day to support the community and the healthcare professionals that actively refer their clients, and is now commissioned by Public Health, County Durham Council.

­Contract Ready For those that may be interested in developing a similar service in their area, it is important to clarify the process of approval that was required by commissioners in both the NHS and Public Health. Living Mindfully is a social enterprise, which can be the criteria for some funding, but not always. I often hear of the challenges reported by individual mindfulness teachers when they approach organizations with a view to introducing mindfulness‐based approaches. In my opinion, this is an extremely diffi­ cult scenario, and in most cases will prove impossible to take forward. If we are to integrate mindfulness into not just healthcare, but other areas such as education and the workplace, the vehicle to accomplish that aim may well be the formation of social enterprises. The administration and organizational aspects of local government contracts alone can prove to be a daunting task without the appointment of non‐teaching staff and

Living Mindfully: A Five-Week Programme

bespoke referral software. Therefore, it would be prudent for experi­ enced mindfulness teachers to consider this option. Through careful attention to detail and adhering to NHS guidelines, Living Mindfully is now an approved NHS service provider and has a set of policies and procedures in place that are compulsory for any organiza­ tion when approaching funders. It is recommended that these be in place before any approach is made.

­Policies and Procedures Disclosure and Barring Service (DBS) Employers liability insurance Public liability insurance Complaints policy Patients’ satisfaction procedure Health and safety at work policy and procedure Incident reporting policy Safeguarding vulnerable adults and young people/children policy Confidentiality policy, compliant with Caldecott requirements Patients’ consent policy Data Protection Act compliance Freedom of Information Act compliance Record keeping/information management policy.

­Referrers and Contra‐indications: Working in Partnership If you are delivering the programme as a commissioned service, the suc­ cess of your endeavour will be in part dependent upon the ability of healthcare professionals to refer appropriate individuals. The success of this process is very much down to the time spent educating referrers in not only what mindfulness is, but also whom it may be suitable for and why for some the time will not be right. It is the opinion of the author that the option of self‐referral may on paper look an easier route, however, in our experience this is fraught with difficulties. To not have the input of a referrer or the relevant medical history, and to rely purely on information from the individual can heighten the probability of risk. Over the years some referrers have attended mindfulness programmes and therefore make decisions around suitability from a place of experi­ ence. Numerous health centres, hospitals, and mental health teams have

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requested presentations or workshops to assist in developing an under­ standing of what the programme entails. However, in general, informa­ tion will be requested via email or post, and will be sent out in the form of a Referrer’s Guide to the Living Mindfully Programme. The key element here is the section on contra‐indications, as inappro­ priate referrals are extremely time‐consuming for all involved and can be upsetting for the individual being referred if their application is unsuita­ ble or deferred. It is worth reproducing here the exact information sent to referrers: Contra‐indications

We ask referrers to be guided by the following contra‐indications. Whilst mindfulness is a helpful response to many difficulties, the programme can be challenging and it is requested that referrers take this into account. Clients who have experienced bereavements, major traumas, or transitions in the past 12 months are usually advised to wait a little longer, as the programme encourages turning towards difficulty this may interfere with the healthy processing of loss or grief. Experience has shown that attending the programme is difficult to sustain for people who are currently misusing substances, including alcohol, and the drop‐out rate has been high for participants with these difficulties, even those who have been highly motivated at the outset. We would therefore request that referrers bear this in mind. We would also recommend that for any­ one currently experiencing acute depression, it might be best to wait until this has receded or is being successfully managed with medication. Those experiencing chronic depression may benefit from attending between episodes. Although mindfulness is being researched as a response to specific mental illnesses and conditions, the programme on offer here is more generic and may not be suitable in some cases. We would, therefore, not usually offer places to those who are currently experiencing dissociative disorders, psychosis, schizophrenia, post‐traumatic stress disorder, ­suicidal ideation, or severe self‐harm. We would prefer to discuss individual cases prior to referral, where there is a query as to the appropriateness of the service. The Living Mindfully programme is a non‐clinical intervention, therefore anyone requiring or in receipt of clinical support should remain under the care of a healthcare professional for the duration of the programme. The relationship with referrers is an integral part of the efficiency and effectiveness of the programme; it is very much a partnership, as well as an opportunity for mutual learning.

Living Mindfully: A Five-Week Programme

­The Five‐week Programme In the Living Mindfully five‐week programme there are five, 2½ hour sessions, delivered in a group format. During these sessions participants receive training in the following four core mindfulness practices: the body scan; mindful movement; walking meditation; and sitting medita­ tion. Participants have access to these four practices as part of the home practice element of the programme, and are asked to practice for 30 min­ utes per day. Added to home practice are opportunities to practice and reflect upon introducing mindfulness into daily life. Over the five weeks participants are encouraged to explore their experi­ ences, moment by moment. They endeavour to cultivate an attitude of curiosity and to let go of judging those experiences as best they can. Within the sessions it is always the intention to bring kindness to what­ ever experience has arisen in the moment, and to pay careful attention to that experience. With this intention, attention, and attitude, it may be pos­ sible to cultivate an alternative way of living. Perhaps accepting that the constant tides of change that flow through our lives, whether they are welcomed or unwanted, are basically the nature of life itself. If we learn to recognize and let go of old habits and reactions, then it may be possible to find alternative ways to respond that are more helpful. Each week participants are guided through meditation practices and given the opportunity to discuss their experience of the practice. It is important to note that during the pre‐course telephone orientation it will have been explained that sharing experiences within the group is volun­ tary, and that the teacher will not ask direct questions. At the end of the session participants receive a handout and the relevant practice to work with at home for the next week. The importance of home practice should not be underestimated in this programme. The habits and reactions we have developed have been cultivated over a long period of time, and so the process of nurturing and exploring new responsive alternatives will not happen immediately. It is more likely that this will be an unfolding process guided by regular practice. It can be difficult in our busy lives to find the time to practice, however, the evidence tells us that it may well be worth the effort. In the absence of a silent day in the five‐week programme participants are offered the opportunity to attend a day of silent practice guided by a mindfulness teacher after they have completed the programme. Silent days are delivered on an ongoing basis and form an important part of the supportive element of the programme. They also have access to what are referred to as ‘refresher days’. This is an opportunity to revisit mindfulness practices taught on the five‐week

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programme and also to share how things are going, whilst meeting other participants at various stages of developing their mindfulness practice. The refresher days are facilitated in the community, and are made availa­ ble within relatively easy reach of where the individual completed their mindfulness programme. The benefits of running these days throughout the year is evident not only in the high attendance levels, but also in the sense of mutual support offered by each group on the day. It is often shared on refresher days how challenging maintaining daily practice can be when the programme ends, so an opportunity to revisit practice in a group format can sometimes provide the motivation to get back to regular practice. In addition to silent and refresher days, there are also monthly practice groups, this is an opportunity to monitor and work through indi­ vidual barriers to practice, to reflect upon mindfulness in daily life, and to deepen understanding. This support is imperative to sustaining mindful­ ness practice, just as intention and commitment to home practice in the programme has been shown to increase awareness leading to symptom reduction and improved well‐being (Carmody & Baer, 2008), so consist­ ent attention to formal and informal practice can provide the vehicle to maintaining those benefits. There is a real sense of a supportive commu­ nity in the programmes; participants often share this by expressing their sadness that the programme has ended. If this supportive environment is, as research suggests, conducive to learning (Rovai, 2002), we should therefore take every opportunity to recreate this insightful space. Consi­ dering the amount of ongoing support available to participants, it could be argued that describing the programme as a five‐week intervention is inaccurate, especially as we have worked to support many individuals for several years. We could perhaps view the five‐week programme as being the building blocks of practice, the foundations from which to build, while the silent, refresher, and practice days offer the support when needed to keep everything we have worked to develop in place. It is important for participants to have a clear intention to set aside the time to practice; it is also helpful if possible to arrive with an open mind. Learning mindfulness is a process, and that process may require a degree of patience. There may be times during the programme that it appears that despite our best efforts nothing is happening or changing. Perhaps the attitude favoured by Jon Kabat‐Zinn is the most appropriate, ‘ I don’t know whether this will work or not, but I am going to give it my best shot and see what happens.’ The programme aims to teach participants to be more aware and present in each moment, that awareness will highlight experiences that are pleasant, unpleasant, and neutral. An integral part of the learning that comes from attending the programme is developing an understanding of how to deal with these experiences in a more skilful and responsive way.

Living Mindfully: A Five-Week Programme

Attending the programme can be challenging, but, like any journey that we embark upon, it is the discoveries along the way that make the experience worthwhile. Mindfulness is a lifetime’s journey along a path that ultimately leads nowhere, only to who you are. (Kabat‐Zinn, 1990)

­References Baer, R. A. (2003). Mindfulness training as a clinical intervention: A conceptual and empirical review. Clinical Psychology: Science and Practice, 10, 125–143. Carmody, J., & Baer, R. A. (2008). Relationships between mindfulness practice and levels of mindfulness, medical, and psychological symptoms and well‐being in a mindfulness‐based stress reduction program. Journal of Behavioral Medicine, 31(1), 23–33. Carmody, J., & Baer, R. A. (2009). How long does a mindfulness‐based stress reduction program need to be? A review of class contact hours and effect sizes for psychological distress. Journal of Clinical Psychology, 65(6), 627–638. Flude, R. (2000). The journey into work: An innovative approach to tackling long‐term youth unemployment. Economic and Labour Relations Review, 12(1), 18–31. Grossman, P., Niemann, L., Schmidt, S., & Walsh, H. (2004). Mindfulness‐ based stress reduction and health benefits: A meta‐analysis. Journal of Psychosomatic Research, 57, 35–43. Heads, G. J. (2011). The effects of a mindfulness‐based intervention with long‐term unemployed. (Unpublished MSc thesis), School of Psychology, University of Wales Bangor. House of Commons. (2012). Mindfulness‐Based Therapy, available at: http://www.theyworkforyou.com/debates/?id=2012‐12‐04a.840.0. Kabat‐Zinn, J. (1990). Full catastrophe living: Using the wisdom of your body and mind to face stress, pain, and illness. New York: Delacorte. Mitchell, M., & Heads, G. J. (2015). Staying well: A follow up of a 5‐week Mindfulness‐Based Stress Reduction programme for a range of psychological issues. Community Mental Health Journal, 51(8), 897–902. doi: 10.1007/s10597‐014‐9825‐5. Rovai, A. P. (2002). Sense of community, perceived cognitive learning, and persistence in asynchronous learning networks. Internet and Higher Education, 5(4), 319–332.

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3 The Art of Orientation In our teacher training programme the time allocated to developing the skill of orientation is considerable. Even then, it is only after completing a wide‐ranging selection of orientations that the importance and variation of issues and experiences brought to the process by participants can be fully appreciated. Each individual that applies, whether it is through a referral from a healthcare professional, an application that is self‐funded, or financed by their organization, is required to complete a telephone pre‐course orientation. The pre‐arranged orientation call is usually 30 minutes in duration, however, it is not uncommon for the time to be considerably longer. The teacher who is leading the programme always completes the orientation. Although this process could be considered time‐consuming, the benefits far outweigh the period required to work through the orientation form. Our main objective is to ascertain if the referral and application is suitable; however, the orientation process is also an opportunity for the teacher and participant to begin to build trust and confidence. This is not just noting the facts as they present themselves, but rather a chance to honour what is said, to be fully present, to gather an understanding of how this person has been dealing with their current or past issues. They may share how they have been reacting to what has been happening and the strategies they have put in place to help them to cope. This is all essential information when determining the composition and risk factors associated with a group, it also gives the teacher valuable insights into how their participants may present when placed in a group situation. It is not only each individual that should be considered from a risk assessment perspective, but also how each participant might impact upon one another. There are no guarantees as to how the dynamics will shift within a group, and there will always be surprises, both positive and negative, as a programme unfolds, but the care and attention to detail taken at this stage may help to reduce the risk and provide some reassurance to both teacher and participant. The final decision around Living Mindfully: Discovering Authenticity through Mindfulness Coaching, First Edition. Gary Heads. © 2017 John Wiley & Sons, Ltd. Published 2017 by John Wiley & Sons, Ltd.

The Art of Orientation

accepting an individual lies solely with the teacher, and that decision will be influenced by the facts as described by the individual; however, the more experience we have of the orientation process, the more we can develop an intuitive sense around the appropriateness of each application, especially those with several risk factors. The results from the risk assessment will also inform the decision as to whether a co‐teacher or assistant is required. If, for example, there are participants that are susceptible to panic disorder or suffer from epilepsy it may be necessary for the teacher to leave the room to attend to a participant, therefore having a co‐teacher or assistant is imperative in high‐risk groups. It is essential that we are clear and concise when communicating our decision, learning to say no is a skill in itself. For some individuals the timing will simply not be right, so the answer is to wait, as teachers we have a duty to ensure that the members of our group arrive at a time that is both conducive to learning, supportive of home practice, and with the ability to fully participate in the mindfulness programme. Before preceding with the orientation the teacher should have clarified that the individual concerned is able to attend all sessions. In terms of how much information is given about the programme, this is open to debate, however, one should always address the following:

­What Mindfulness Is, and What It Is Not Providing a definition of just what mindfulness is can be a tricky proposition, we can get caught up in language that is unfamiliar, and our explanation may become too complex. The following is a description that goes some way to clarifying what mindfulness is, and how it can impact upon daily life: Mindfulness is a way of learning to relate directly to whatever is happening in your life, a way of taking charge of your life, a way of doing something for yourself that no one else can do for you – consciously and systematically working with your own stress, pain, illness, and the challenges and demands of everyday life. When we practice mindfulness, we are open to every experience, present in every moment, and in close contact with the unfolding of our own lives. Our awareness develops and becomes spacious, open, and relaxed. When we live mindfully, we slow down enough to understand what is really going on, and can find our way more effectively through difficulties. Through the regular practice of mindfulness, calmness and clarity emerge and help us to find a place of stability and strength. (Kabat‐Zinn, 1990)

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Many come to orientation with a wide and varied perception of what mindfulness actually is, and therefore what they are coming to do. One such view is that by attending the programme they will be able to relax, and there is no reason to suggest that this is wrong, in fact, feeling relaxed can only be helpful. It is important to explain that this is not the aim of the mindfulness programme, feeling calm and relaxed does not mean we are practising correctly, just as feeling irritated, with our mind constantly flooded with thoughts, does not mean we have failed. If we are aware of our experience, whatever that experience may be, we are practising mindfulness. Another frequently expressed objective is to somehow empty the mind of thoughts, and it is entirely possible that through mindfulness practice the mind will settle and become calm. Striving to free our self from unwanted thoughts may only produce anxiety, frustration, and anger. It is not necessarily our thoughts that create problems for us, but rather how we are relating to those thoughts. Often participants explain that it feels like they are in a battle to control the mind; it is, however, learning to respond to thoughts in a mindful and wise way that  can create a sense of control, rather than an ongoing struggle for supremacy. The availability of information around mindfulness continues to increase, and the accuracy of this information is varied, therefore, the orientation process is the ideal opportunity to explain exactly what mindfulness is, and what is expected of the participant. Question 1: Why Have You Chosen to Attend the Mindfulness Programme?

The answer to this question is open to interpretation; it can be relatively simple, such as ‘My doctor recommended it’, or ‘I have read a book about mindfulness’. For others, it may be an opportunity to share the journey through life that has brought them to this moment. The conversation around difficult events and experiences can be challenging for both ­parties, and whilst the teacher needs to honour and listen carefully, it is also important to explain the boundaries around confidentiality and the use of the inquiry process within sessions. The prospect of being asked to participate in a group format can be a difficult proposition, especially for participants with high levels of anxiety and stress. It is therefore important at this stage to set out the ground rules that will allow the teacher to create a safe environment from which to deliver the programme. The area of most concern appears to be interacting with the group; hence, the instruction given here is that all that is required is a first name. In terms of the inquiry process direct questions will not be asked, it is an invitation to the group to share elements of their experience of the relevant

The Art of Orientation

mindfulness practice. You cannot emphasise enough that it is fine to be quiet and listen. An explanation of the core practices – body scan, movement, walking, and sitting  –  is mandatory, whilst a discussion about mobility and ­alternative postures if required will help to alleviate concerns. The home practice element of the programme is a fundamental requirement, and this should be discussed and agreed upon; if the participant remains uncommitted or unsure that they can fit the practice into their daily schedule, then this may not be the right time to attend. At this stage of the orientation it is useful to make sure the applicant is not currently receiving treatment from a healthcare professional, such as counselling or cognitive behavioural therapy (CBT). The mindfulness programme can at times be difficult and emotionally challenging, therefore, engaging with an additional intervention may be counterproductive. In these ­situations the advice is to wait or suspend the current intervention until the mindfulness programme is completed. This would need to be with the approval of the healthcare professional in question. Those with a long‐standing or a recurring condition can sometimes come to mindfulness with a sense of urgency; perhaps due to other interventions or ­medication being less successful than hoped, and this can create unrealistic expectations. It is therefore best to encourage an open mind and discourage evaluating progress until after the programme ends. The issue of one’s ability to be in a group, and home practice are ­discussed further in the following questions. Question 2: How Will You Find Working in a Group?

The general consensus expressed by participants when completing feedback forms is that the experience of being in a group has been both ­supportive and nurturing. It is, nevertheless, understandable that some people might feel uncomfortable when placed in this situation. Most will settle into the group format and attune to learning in this way, but for others, perhaps due to a period of social isolation instigated by depression, anxiety, or panic disorder, the potential arising of thoughts about being judged, evaluated, or criticized will need to be alleviated to some extent. It is helpful to reinforce that speaking in the group is optional and suggest that they arrive early to help them settle and become familiar with the room. If several participants fall into this category, then having a co‐teacher or assistant would be a sensible option. Question 3: Can You Find Time to Complete the Home Practice?

The requirement to practice for 30 minutes per day at home is an essential ingredient of the programme. Coming to every session is important,

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but without commitment to home practice any potential benefits from learning mindfulness will diminish considerably. Although we do not underestimate the challenge of allocating time for practice in perhaps an already overloaded schedule, consideration is given to how and if the necessary period can be apportioned and sustained. In this section we can explore and give suggestions to support the integration of daily ­practice. A good place to start if applicable is to suggest that participants inform their family that they are attending the programme and will need some quiet time during the day. Depending upon their lifestyle, it is ­useful to decide the best time to practice as they may need to arise earlier in the morning, re‐schedule tasks, or change their evening schedule. Although the need for silence is not obligatory, finding a relatively quiet place can be conducive to practice. However, the intention to practice is more important, how participants are progressing can be discussed in sessions, as can the topic of distractions when practising and reactions to this. If the group process and home practice requirements are agreed, then we can begin to explore any other issues that may impact upon the individual’s ability to complete the programme. Question 4: Do You have a Learning Disability or Potential Difficulty that could Impact upon Aspects of the Course?

The information shared from discussing Question 4 will assist the teacher in making any arrangements where possible to accommodate those with difficulties that may affect their ability to understand information or communication. Increasing the typeface on handouts or transferring information to audio are options to assist with home practice for those with limited vision. Participants with hearing difficulties can be placed next to the teacher or opposite if they are lip reading. For those with dyslexia or difficulties involving writing, the instructions for exercises that may cause concern could be given a week early, allowing participants to bring them to the next session and so join in with discussions. It is worth noting that it is only in sessions 4 and 5 that this would occur. Question 5: Medication

The reason for checking what your participant has been prescribed in the way of medication is mainly to ascertain any possible side‐effects that could affect them in the sessions or impact their ability to complete home practice. This is particularly relevant for those who have recently changed medication, as it is often reported that new medication can initially be unsettling and can produce unpleasant sensations. Those with medication

The Art of Orientation

that causes drowsiness can sometimes be best allocated a morning rather than afternoon or evening programme. In most cases, issues around medication are minimal, however, very occasionally the situation arises where a participant needs to administer medication during a session, perhaps due to high pain levels or epilepsy. How this will be managed should be predetermined alongside any involvement by the co‐teacher or assistant. Question 6: What are the Client’s Strategies and Support Systems if Difficulties Arise?

Exploring how your participant deals with stressful events can give an insight into how they react or respond to difficult situations. Often they will have developed strategies that are both helpful and unhelpful. For example, some may choose to isolate themselves or go to bed, whilst others may go for a walk or ring a friend. This may be beneficial to the teacher in being able to recognize these patterns should they arise in a session or if someone is finding it difficult to attend. If the participant has limited support at home, then the teacher may wish to contact them if they appear to be struggling during the course of the programme. Although it may appear that they have adequate support through family and friends often people choose not to share difficulties. Question 7: Is the Client Planning any Major Changes whilst Participating in the Course?

It may sound counterproductive, but the process of working through the five‐week programme can at times be stressful. It is important that the participant’s current situation is relatively settled. It would not be ideal if the individual were moving house, changing their job, or getting divorced during or prior to attending the programme. Any transitions in life that are stressful and emotionally challenging are not conducive to attending a mindfulness programme as in these situations engaging with the programme content and completing home practice would be difficult. Deferring to a later programme should be suggested. Question 8: Has the Client had any Significant Life Events or Traumas in the Past Year?

If the answer to this question is yes, and the event or trauma was recent, then it would be unlikely that the individual would be accepted at this particular time. There are, of course, exceptions and this can be gauged only by talking to the participant; for example, bereavement in the last twelve months would be dependent upon the individual’s relationship with that person. Although we are stating within one year, it is always cautionary to

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check if any past events still produce recurrent thoughts, feelings, and emotions that are upsetting. Of course, some significant life events are ongoing, such as caring for elderly parents or children with physical or mental difficulties. The event could be of a financial nature or a work issue. Careful consideration should be given to whether the ­programme could be emotionally overwhelming or in some cases beneficial.

­Mental Health Question 9

The following mental health issues are checked to ensure participant suitability: some information will have been provided by the completed referral or application forms and should be used as reference. Depression

If a potential participant has suffered from recurrent episodes, it is important to ask how they are at the current time. If they were in the midst of a depressive episode, they would not be considered at this time. If, however, they are currently well or stable with medication, allocating a place could be an option. It is important when working with this population that the teacher has the relevant training and expertise, and an understanding of how mindfulness and working in a group might affect the individual would be imperative. Another option would be to consider signposting the applicant to a Mindfulness‐Based Cognitive Therapy (MBCT) programme (Ma & Teasdale, 2004). Psychosis

Anyone with a history of psychosis or a recent psychotic episode would not be suitable. The evidence base for mindfulness and psychosis is in its infancy. Some research points to potential benefits with an adapted programme (Chadwick, 2014), however, mindfulness programmes taught within this population should be delivered only by practitioners with an expertise in this area. Schizophrenia

Anyone diagnosed with schizophrenia would be unsuitable for this particular programme. Although an increasing number of mindfulness interventions are being used with individuals with psychosis or schizophrenia, as yet research is unable to substantiate its effectiveness (Khoury, Lecomte, Gaudiano, & Paquin, 2013). Only practitioners who have expertise in this area should deliver programmes to these groups.

The Art of Orientation

Alcohol or drug dependency

The criteria regarding alcohol and drug dependency require that any potential participant must have abstained from the use of alcohol or drugs for a minimum period of 12 months. Mindfulness‐based programmes specifically for this population have been developed, including the Mindfulness‐Based Relapse Prevention (MBRP) (Bowen et al., 2009). Post‐traumatic stress disorder

This is an area that is difficult to ascertain suitability. Anyone with severe post‐traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) would not be allocated a place. There are, however, exceptions, which might include someone who has been diagnosed but the frequency of flashbacks is now minimal. The teacher would need to clarify how the individual would be in a group scenario if difficult thoughts arose. This falls into the category of delivery by a skilled practitioner with experience in working with PTSD. Suicidality

There are several important questions to address in this section of the orientation. One is to establish whether the participant has at any time in their life had thoughts concerning suicide, and, if this is the case, did they plan how they would carry out the suicide attempt or indeed act upon those thoughts? Although this can be a difficult conversation establishing if these thoughts are still occurring, how often they arise, and whether they would consider acting upon them are the challenging questions that are required. The answers will not only assist the teacher in making a decision, but, more importantly, will safeguard the individual’s wellbeing. Anyone with current suicidal ideation would not be considered. It is important to note that potential participants who have been subject to suicidal thoughts at some time in their lives is not uncommon, however, moving from thoughts to planning and action is a significant shift. It is advisable for teachers to complete Suicide Intervention Skills Training; this will give them an insight into the potential warning signs during an orientation, and how to take the appropriate action (Rodgers, 2010). Other mental health difficulties

This section would potentially include issues such as anxiety, panic disorder, obsessive compulsive disorder (OCD), phobias, and eating ­ problems. Issues such as OCD can include an obsession with cleanliness that can cover the handling of food, which would potentially impact upon the

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eating meditation in session 1. This should be discussed and any alternative arrangements made.

­Physical Health Question 10: Does the Client have any Physical Illness or Disability?

The information gathered from this question will inform the teacher of any adjustments and options that will need to be given to accommodate participants’ needs. For instance, conditions that can lead to chronic pain, including rheumatoid arthritis, fibromyalgia, multiple sclerosis (MS), or anyone suffering from pain caused by trauma or accidental injury, may require options around posture, changing position, working with difficulty, and taking care of themselves. This is applicable to all practices. For conditions such as myalgic encephopathy (ME) and chronic fatigue syndrome (CFS), where debilitating fatigue and painful muscles and joints are commonplace, participants will need to work within their own limits and be given the option to rest or sit out some practices. Question 11: Does the Client have Asthma or any Other Breathing Difficulty? How is this Managed?

As the breath is our focus of attention in the majority of practices taught, it is essential to explore this process with any participant that reports suffering from breathing difficulties. This may include asthma, chronic obstructive pulmonary disease (COPD), or allergies. As long as the condition is well managed this would not be a reason to reject an application. It is helpful to give those with breathing difficulties choices around where in the body they can focus attention on their breath, encouraging them to explore the breath in the abdomen, chest, mouth, or nose. Alternatively, they could use other sensations in the body to ground themselves in the moment, such as connecting with their feet touching the floor. Question 12: Information Checklist

At this point the potential participant will have been allocated a place, deferred for review at a later date, or deemed unsuitable at this present time. For those who will be attending the programme the following final check is required. The body scan, movement, walking, and sitting practices

Ensure that the participant fully understands the nature of the core practices in the programme, including any options available due to physical issues.

The Art of Orientation

Activities and discussions

This is an opportunity to reinforce the choices concerning speaking in the group. Home practice

Confirm with the participant that they appreciate the importance of home practice in the programme. Confidentiality

Depending upon your confidentiality policy and procedures as an individual teacher or organization, you will need to explain what will happen to the information given on any forms the participant or referrer have completed, this includes any notes made during the orientation process. The participant will also need to be informed that they are the gatekeepers of any information shared in activities, discussions, inquiry, and in  the sessions in general. If more than one teacher is delivering the ­programme, permission will need to be given by the participant for their information to be shared. The safety and care of individuals whilst attending programmes should always be at the forefront of our thinking, and to this end we need to explain to the participant what will happen if we become concerned about them during the programme. Support from the teacher to assist with any difficulties arising within sessions or from home practice is a fundamental requirement; however, although unusual, it is possible that the level of concern could require the intervention of a healthcare professional. Under our duty of care as teachers we need to explain this to the participant and agree a designated contact if this should arise, in most cases this would be a GP. Question 13: Are there any Aspects of the Course that are of Concern to the Client?

This is an opportunity to clarify that the participant understands all the information discussed in the pre‐course orientation and is happy to proceed. Risk assessment

Once we have our referrals and have completed pre‐course orientations, it is important to complete a risk assessment form. This will include practical guidance in relation to your venue and procedural instruction for your participants. It is a useful reminder to list any mental health issues identified through referral forms and orientation. Table 3.1 is an example of the risk assessment form designed by Living Mindfully (2014):

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Active support in or out of the room by a teacher, discussion with participant, support to re‐join group if required, contact with referrer if deemed appropriate.

Ring participant at home if they have left the session early. Contact the referrer if teacher is unable to contact the participant direct. Teacher to consult referrer if this seems advisable.

Use proper lifting techniques and use lift, do not carry large amounts. Do not ask participants to help with moving furniture or larger equipment; store equipment and chairs safely; pay careful attention to potential obstacles. Careful delivery of materials, clear instructions, observation by teacher(s), offer alternative options, reminders to withdraw or rest whenever appropriate. Offer option of seated movements. Discussion with individuals prior to start of course on how to handle any event, participant’s instructions taken and noted. Use lift for wheelchair access. Provision of tissues etc. for general group use. Request that participants inform the teacher if they wish to leave the course before the session ends. Have one teacher/assistant free to check with participants if they leave the session. Careful observation, consultation with participant.

Carrying equipment to and from room.

Participants fall or misuse equipment.

Participants feel ill or over‐stressed through activity on the course.

Participants leaving the course without notifying the teacher and then suffering potential distress without appropriate support if they have ‘unearthed’ a particular emotion that is difficult for them. Participant with no home support; may need support if any distressing material arises.

See first aider based in building – contact through reception.

See first aider based in building – contact through reception .

Follow drill as per fire instructions.

Inform group of fire drill, including action for wheelchair users.

Fire alarm.

Action if event arises

Action to mitigate risk

Risk

Table 3.1  Risk Assessment Form

The Art of Orientation

­Summary The orientation process described in this chapter and the recommendations and guidance suggested for completion has been drawn from over three thousand applicants. The orientation method used continues to develop alongside the widening populations who wish to incorporate mindfulness into their daily life. The care and attention taken at this point can minimize the possibility of someone deciding not to continue attending the programme or not attending after being allocated a place. A testimony to the success of this pre‐course orientation approach is borne out by an attendance evaluation of the Living Mindfully Programme over a five‐year period. The figures are taken from the programme ­commissioned by Public Health in County Durham in northeast England. During this period over two hundred five‐week programmes were ­delivered with an average attendance rate of 90%. From a teacher’s perspective completing orientations can be demanding, so it is recommended that a breathing space is implemented before and after, and that orientations are spread across the working day.

­References Bowen, S., Chawla, N., Collins, S. E., Witkiewitz, K., Hsu, S., Grow, J., Marlatt, A. (2009). Mindfulness‐based relapse prevention for substance use disorders: A pilot efficacy trial. Substance Abuse, 30(4), 295–305. Chadwick, P. (2014). Mindfulness for psychosis. British Journal of Psychiatry, 204(5),333–334. Kabat‐Zinn, J. (1990). Full catastrophe living: Using the wisdom of your body and mind to face stress, pain, and illness. New York: Delacorte. Khoury, B., Lecomte, T., Gaudiano, B. A., & Paquin, K. (2013). Mindfulness interventions for psychosis: a meta‐analysis. Schizophrenia Research, 150(1), 176–184. Ma, S. H., & Teasdale, J. D.. (2004). Mindfulness‐based cognitive therapy for depression: Replication and exploration of differential relapse prevention effects. Journal of Consulting and Clinical Psychology, 72(1), 31. Rodgers, P. L. (2010). Review of the Applied Suicide Intervention Skills Training program (ASIST): Rationale, evaluation results, and directions for future research. Calgary, Canada: Living Works Education Inc.

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4 The Inquiry Process The essence of our teaching lies in our personal practice and our trust in the process of mindfulness. As teachers we simply point the way on a continually unfolding journey. (Gary Heads, www.livingmindfully.co.uk) The process of inquiring into the experiences of participants is perhaps the most challenging element of teaching mindfulness. Those that are in training or new to teaching can find the development of this skill ­difficult and at times confusing. There are times when teaching inquiry is a fluid process, it flows like a winding stream with very little effort, and the learning points we wish to explore in the group arrive with ultimate ease. However, in equal measure, inquiry is not always like this, there are times when participants drift away from their experience into storytelling or sharing life experiences rather than exploring the practice. Sometimes, there is very little feedback or participants talk to each other and begin sharing similar, or different experiences, or opposites. At other times, the role of the teacher is to simply hold the space and acknowledge what is being shared, rather than to strive to unravel a ­participant’s experience that is not ours to unravel, or endeavour to bring some form of understanding to the process. It is perfectly acceptable for both teacher and participant not to know, it is in just these moments that we must remind ourselves that learning to be mindful is a process, and that we must trust this process. Our participants are embarking on a very personal and challenging journey, mindfulness is the map, at times they will discover new landscapes and at other times they will feel lost, and it is in these moments that the role of the teacher is to simply point the way. In a nutshell, inquiry is a conversation, a dialogue between teacher and participant with the invitation to fully explore whatever experience has  arisen during the meditative process. From this conversation the Living Mindfully: Discovering Authenticity through Mindfulness Coaching, First Edition. Gary Heads. © 2017 John Wiley & Sons, Ltd. Published 2017 by John Wiley & Sons, Ltd.

The Inquiry Process

unfolding of wisdom and learning has the opportunity to emerge not only for the individual engaged in inquiry, but also for the group as a whole. The pivotal component in this process is the teacher’s embodiment of mindfulness, a non‐judgemental, accepting, and curious attentiveness to participants’ experience, which models the attitudes we are encouraging participants to adopt towards themselves and their experiences. An interesting and thought‐provoking description of inquiry is ‘disciplined improvisation’: Inquiry is a process of disciplined improvisation which is both highly specific to the conditions of the moment it took place in, and uses repeated and recognizable patterns of interaction. (Crane, Stanley, Rooney, & Mardula, 2014) You could perhaps liken this to the in‐the‐moment improvisation of a jazz pianist. The sequence of musical notes that emerges is built on hours of practising scales and arpeggios; it is through this process of disciplined daily practice that the skill of improvisation becomes possible. Similarly, the ability of a mindfulness teacher to be fully present, to stay centred and grounded as the improvisation of inquiry plays out will only come from consistent, disciplined, daily mindfulness practice. Facilitating inquiry is, in essence, relatively simple: after guiding a practice or during a review of home practice the teacher will ask participants what they noticed, fundamentally we are inviting our participants to share their experience. It is worth pointing out at this stage that during the orientation we will have emphasized that sharing in inquiry is not compulsory, therefore, the language we use should reinforce this option, whilst still inviting the participant to contribute. The questions should be open‐ended, for example: I would be really interested to hear what you noticed during that practice. Would anyone like to share their experience of completing that practice? I am curious to hear your experience of that practice, would anyone like to share what they noticed? The teacher is merely supporting in an open and kindly manner a gentle exploration of an individual’s experience. In this scenario the individual is perceived as the expert, whilst the teacher holds the ‘frame’ of inquiry, encouraging and guiding the participant to reflect and learn from whatever has arisen. Through this process of dialogue and reflection the

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teacher and participant collaborate to explore whatever has been observed. All the while the teacher is listening for opportunities to interweave curriculum aims, intentions, and the attitudinal foundations into what the participant has observed (Crane et al., 2013). Inquiry has been depicted as a dialogue that progresses through three concentric circles and layers (Segal, Williams, & Teasdale, 2012): (1) noticing physical sensation, thoughts, emotions, and feelings; (2) exploring noticing within a framework of personal understanding; and (3)  expanding understanding in a wider context. Although the three ­layers can be described as sequential to some degree, and this provides a helpful map, it may be, however, that interwoven is a more apt description. It is helpful to think of inquiry in this way, but it is also important to hold this lightly, it is a guide. The unfolding of experiences and the ­learning gleaned from reflecting upon those experiences will evolve differently for each participant, therefore, the teacher may need to ­ improvise within the circles and layers of the inquiry process.

­ oticing Physical Sensations, Thoughts, N Emotions/Feelings Layer 1

This layer is primarily focused on the direct experience of the ­participant. In the early stages of the programme we are principally concerned with the observation and exploration of sensations, thoughts, and emotions that arise within the body; however, observations regarding experiences stimulated by external events such as sounds are also reflected upon, and it would be fair to perhaps call this the sensorial layer. In the initial stages of the programme this layer should not be underestimated, it provides the foundation from which our participants will develop their ability to pay attention and become aware of their experiences. Although this layer is of the upmost importance it can also be elusive, as relating to physical experience can be unusual for many people and participants can ­easily slip into a narrative or story about their experience (Rockman, 2012–15). It is a matter of personal preference as to how you begin; it is fine to initiate inquiry by asking participants what they noticed or, alternatively, to suggest that they close their eyes and take a moment to reflect upon their experience of the practice before you proceed. Having begun by asking your group what they noticed and if they would like to share any of their experiences, the question then arises of where do we go with their answers? The emphasis at this point is on the exploration of physical ­sensations, however, we are also looking at thoughts and emotions in the context of how they

The Inquiry Process

may influence experience and manifest as sensations. There is also the possibility of sensations, thoughts, and emotions arising due to external events, perhaps smell or sound. Our questions should encourage the individual to become interested in and curious about whatever has arisen in the practice. The following statements were shared by participants in the first week of a programme in response to having completed a body scan practice, although far from comprehensive the feedback is common at this stage. It is helpful to begin by reaffirming the feedback to the participant, as this will ensure that you have understood correctly, and will reinforce what has been said to both the participant and the group. I found it really difficult to focus on the practice, my mind ­wandered a lot. The realization of just how much our minds wander can come as a surprise to many participants; periods of being lost in thought can be highlighted in the body scan as the sequential nature of the practice means that any sections of the practice that are missed may be noticed. Teacher: When your mind wandered where did it go? Participant: It was really quite random, but lots of thoughts around not being able to do the practice. I felt a strong desire to somehow control my mind. Teacher: Did you feel that strong desire anywhere in the body? Participant: Yes, in my chest, a tightness, and fast heartbeat, I felt quite anxious. Teacher: What did you do with those feelings of anxiety in the chest? Participant: They were quite strong for a while, but then I managed to return to the body scan. Teacher: Isn’t it interesting that your mind pulling you away from the body scan created thoughts about not being able to do the practice, and that these thoughts created anxiety that manifested in the chest as a physical sensation? However, by moving your attention back to the practice the sensations in the chest subsided? Participant: Yes, eventually. This is just one example of how inquiry may have unfolded, other questions that would have been appropriate could have included: Where did these thoughts take you? Were they about now, or the past, or future?

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Were there any emotions, feelings, or sensations connected to the thoughts? Did the sensation change or was it constant? How did you respond to this experience? If we look at further feedback from session 1 we can begin to see the emergence of certain themes that are frequently shared at this stage of the programme: I noticed that parts of my body were very tight and tense, ­especially around the shoulders. We all carry our stress in various parts of the body, usually with very little awareness and often with an unwillingness to visit and pay attention to these places. With this in mind, the fact that our participant has noticed this tension and discomfort during the practice and been willing to share that experience demonstrates a powerful intention to learn, and provides the starting point for working with difficulties. An awareness of how we are holding tension affords the opportunity to work with it, and the ­possibility, though not guaranteed, of softening, and release. If the ­participant is ­willing to discuss this experience further we could explore how they related to this tightness and tension. Did any thoughts or e­ motions arise? Did the sensations stay the same? How did you react to this discovery? Often the act of placing our attention in a painful or uncomfortable part of the body and acknowledging its presence can lessen the intensity. It is also interesting to explore what happened to the discomfort when the attention was moved to another part of the body. It is worth pointing out that trying to relax may also cause tension. An awareness of pain and tension in the body and learning to work with the difficulty can be the first step in re‐educating ourselves to distinguish between physical sensations and mental and emotional ­ ­feelings, we can learn to see the layers we add to our physical experience, and we can begin to accept the sensation as just that, a physical sensation (Stahl & Goldstein, 2010). I was fidgety and I really wanted to move. Is it really that surprising that we feel fidgety, restless, or perhaps bored in a mindfulness practice? How often in our day‐to‐day lives are we actually able to pay careful attention for a sustained period of time? However, the difference here is that our participant has noticed and become aware of the experience. We could therefore inquire into how they reacted to those sensations. What did they notice? Did the sensations stay continuously or come and go? How did it feel to be fidgety, restless, or bored?

The Inquiry Process

It is the nature of human beings to strive for outcomes, so the quest for stillness may well produce anxiety when distractions arise. I felt very relaxed; in fact I thought I fell asleep at some point. This could almost be classified as the opposite of the above; ­nevertheless, it brings with it its own brand of distraction and potential barriers to practice. If you have had an unrelenting period of stress and anxiety the general feelings associated with this may well be agitation, panic, ­restlessness, sleep deprivation, and an overall feeling of uneasiness. If you then have an experience in the body scan practice that is relaxing and you find yourself drifting in and out of the practice you could so easily sink into that experience. What is interesting in inquiry is how participants work with this; in itself this is simply their experience in the moment, yet so often we find that they have found themselves judging the experience whether negatively or positively. From a positive perceptive it is deemed as a wonderful experience: the most relaxed I have been for years. The other side of the coin can be around doubt: I cannot do it, I have missed most of the practice so will be behind everyone else; or negative self‐talk: this is another thing I ­cannot do. Our question therefore could be: ‘what did you do when you noticed you had drifted off?’ As inquiry unfolds we may have the ­opportunity to explore accepting the moment as it is, if we are relaxed or falling asleep this is our experience, it is not because we have done something right or wrong. We merely bring our awareness to the experience, and to any thoughts, emotions, and feelings that may be arising as a result of r­ eacting to that experience. It is always worth pointing out the c­ hanging nature of mindfulness practice, every time we practice it will be different, yet it will always be our experience and therefore if we are paying attention to that experience we are practising. I got annoyed that my mind was jumping around, and sounds bothered me. Just as in life, we can find ourselves striving in mindfulness practice to make things a certain way rather than accepting how they happen to be in this moment. This is no more evident than when we are seeking silence in practice and are distracted by the arising and passing of sounds. This is often shared in groups with differing levels of reactivity ranging from ­curiosity to anger. Again, we inquire into what they noticed, what thoughts, emotions, and feelings arose when they were distracted. The issue of sound is an interesting one, as it can have a wide‐ranging effect upon a participant’s ability to stay with the given practice. For instance, a sound

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can instigate a memory, which then produces an emotion, and depending upon the nature of the memory they can become lost in the pleasantness or find themselves caught up in aversion. It can produce instant j­ udgements and strong feelings and emotions. I remember a lady sharing the ­experience of having been drawn to birdsong in a body scan practice, she described how this had produced a sense of calm and a warm feeling in the chest. Seconds later she was full of anger and describing tightness and an a­ nxious feeling in the abdomen, all this created by someone closing the door rather loudly in the building. All these experiences are a good opportunity to explore how we react to distractions; they are a wonderful source of ­ isdom as the course progresses. ­learning, and will plant the seeds of w Perhaps the insight expressed by Ajahn Chah sums it up, the following is his interpretation of an event and the influence of sound. Sound is just Sound. It Does its Job

Ajahn Chah knew that cutting oneself off from the world was not the place of true inner peace. This was the result of his own years of trying to make the world shut up and leave him alone. He failed miserably. Eventually, he was able to see that this is not how to find completion and resolution. Years before, he had been a wandering monk, living on his own on a mountainside above a village and keeping a strict meditation schedule. In Thailand due to the very hot day time temperature, it is common for film screenings to take place outdoors in the coolness of the night and to last all night! If there was a party, it tended to go on all night. On one occasion, Ajahn Chah was quietly meditating up on the mountain while there was a festival going on down in the village. All the local folk songs and pop music were amplified throughout the area. Ajahn Chah sat, seething and thinking, ‘Don’t they realize all the bad karma involved in disturbing my meditation? They know I’m up here. After all, I’m their teacher. Haven’t they learned anything? I bet they’re boozing and out of control,’ and so on and so forth. But Ajahn Chah was a pretty smart fellow. As he listened to himself ­complaining, he quickly realized, ‘Well, they’re just having a good time down there. I’m making myself miserable up here. No matter how upset I get, my anger is just making more noise internally.’ And then he had the insight that: ‘Oh, the sound is just the sound. It’s me who is going out to annoy it. If I leave the sound alone, it won’t annoy me. It’s just doing what it has to do. That’s what sound does. It makes sound. This is its job. So if I don’t go out and bother the sound, it’s not going to bother me. Aha!’ (Ajahn, 2012). I noticed very little in the way of sensations, maybe I wasn’t doing it right?

The Inquiry Process

This is a misconception often shared in inquiry, though understandable when you consider how we have been taught from infancy that we need to achieve outcomes in order to ‘do it right’. To then introduce the c­ oncept of ‘you cannot do it wrong’ can create a certain amount of confusion. In essence, we are simply being aware of any sensations in the body, or absence of sensations. Yet, when you are given the opportunity to look at this more deeply in inquiry, the reactions are wide‐ranging and deeply rooted in our conditioning and habitual thinking. When asked the ­question, ‘what was your reaction, if any, to this experience?’ participants can reveal a whole catalogue of thoughts, emotions, feelings, judgements, negativity, and worry. This can include anxiety and worry that there are no sensations or, upon discovering sensations, becoming stressed, and both can lead to ‘is there something wrong with me?’ If we cannot feel any sensations, then we will create some by wiggling the toes or moving. It is also easy to slip into visualizing the parts of the body rather than bringing awareness to each section. In other words, we add thoughts and emotions that create anxiety or adapt the practice because we are ­unwilling to accept our experience as it is in that moment. However, at this stage of inquiry the emphasis is on the direct experience of the practice, noticing physical sensations or absence of sensations, and bringing awareness to those thoughts, feelings, and emotions that are connected or manifesting as physical sensations in the body. As well as inquiry within the session from week 2 onwards there will be inquiry relating to home practice review. Listed below are comments shared by participants after completion of week 1 (body scan practice). Gill: It was a new experience for me, as I’ve never done anything like this before. I found it relaxing but also comforting. To be truthful, initially I found it hard to focus on each area as the body scan progressed around the whole body, 30 mins is quite some time, however, with time my focus has improved and I find it enjoyable, time for me, my mind and body to unwind and relax. Also, it reminds you about the inner depths of your body and parts you don’t generally think to take notice of, and it all amounts to just connecting with those feelings and sensations. Rosie: I found the body scan extremely useful. I have chronic pain and the body scan allows me to relax the areas of my body that don’t have pain. It makes me more aware that there is more of my body not in pain than in pain, which is something I don’t recognize usually. Jan: When I initially experienced the body scan meditation I assumed it was a method of relaxation. Lying there focusing on

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various parts of my body it was easy to drift off into a short snooze. However, as the weeks progressed it became so much more, instead of drifting off to sleep I found I was able to maintain focus and let go of the random thoughts rushing through my mind. I’d never experienced such a feeling of empowerment. If I could ­control my thoughts this way, then life just got a whole lot simpler. Jaclyn: When I first started doing the body scan I remember ­wondering what it ‘should’ feel like and whether I was doing it ­correctly. I remember thinking ‘if we are going in to this much detail about the little toe, we’re going to be here a while!’ With time and practice I began to just notice and my focus became much more about the sensation than the thoughts. It takes a bit of g­ etting used to, but [it’s] worth the effort. Sally: I felt a bit silly at first not knowing what to expect. As the words were said I followed the directions and struggled to concentrate. I kept drifting off to think about other things, but accepting this was ok, I kept bringing myself back to the words and my breathing. Admittedly I did fall asleep during the process but awoke feeling completely new.

­ xploring Direct Noticing Within a Personal E Framework of Understanding Layer 2

As we develop the skill of noticing we can begin to establish an understanding of our experiences, we learn to observe, to take a step back, and enhance the ability to see experiences clearly as they unfold. Participants may begin to establish the role of the ‘observer’, noticing how intentionally placing attention is different to how we usually attend to experiences. It is the remit of the teacher to both facilitate this process and to offer support that helps to draw out these connections. This is a skill that develops over time, but should always be approached with beginners mind and looked upon as ‘work in progress’. We develop skills and e­ xperience of conducting inquiry by consistently working with our groups, but also run the risk of that experience becoming formulaic and dictating our facilitation of the inquiry process. After all, we are just as prone to falling into autopilot as the individuals with whom we are w ­ orking. As with all aspects of our teaching, personal practice is the key to unlocking the capacity to be fully present – with this particular group, at this particular time – grounded in

The Inquiry Process

the fullness of the moment. From this standpoint we can let the learning points and themes emerge from what is being shared in the moment, we trust the process. To use the words of Gregory Kramer (2010): ‘To trust emergence is to let go into the changing process we call now.’ This stage of inquiry is sometimes referred to as the tracking layer; it is perhaps an appropriate description as we are tracking the unfolding of our experience, exploring the trail of interpretation through awareness, reflection, and inquiry. It is imperative that the teacher approaches this process of investigation with great sensitivity and humility; never underestimate how ­challenging it is for a participant to share their innermost thoughts and feelings within the context of a group. We need to arrive in this moment with no agenda or expectations, but rather with a combination of ­compassion, curiosity, a willingness to let go, and not know the answers. Body language, by its very nature, communicates; it is helpful to be aware of arms across, legs across, and the movement of the head looking away or down, as all can be signs of someone feeling threatened or defensive. If you notice, or sense, that someone is being defensive, be prepared to just say ‘thank you’ no matter how interesting the inquiry happens to be, and always ask permission to engage in, or to continue, with inquiry. As an example using the theme of mind wandering, the following ­questions might be asked in inquiry: So you noticed lots of activity and an awareness that your mind was ­drifting away? How did you feel when this was happening? What did you do when you mind wandered? When you became aware of this how did that affect your experience? Does any of this seem familiar in any way? What we are doing here is helping our participants to unpick the various components that make up their experience. By reflecting and bringing curiosity to what has unfolded in any given practice they may begin to see the trail of thoughts, emotions, sensations, and feelings that link together to produce their reactions and responses. In other words, they learn to participate and observe. This level of noticing opens the door to insight, seeing the content of the present moment clearly and understanding how reactions can cause suffering, and that other choices, grounded in ­wisdom rather than reactivity, are available. Working in this way our ­participants may begin to observe the emergence of the general feeling tone of their moment‐by‐moment experience, perhaps noticing that the mind has a tendency towards labelling what is occurring as pleasant, unpleasant, or neutral. This categorization can lead to the reactivity of

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aversion if the content of the present moment is deemed to be unpleasant, unwanted, or with attachment if the experience is pleasant. A neutral experience may be met with the arising of boredom or zoning out. By bringing moment‐to‐moment awareness to their unfolding practice ­participants begin to develop concentration. This can enhance the ability to see clearly exactly what is actually arising in the present moment, and the inclination to substitute actual experience with their own ideas, interpretations, and conclusions. Questions that could be used to assist participants to reflect upon this process could include: So when you noticed this, what happened next? And then? You noticed this arising in the body, how did that feel? When you became aware that your mind had wandered and you were able to bring it back to the practice, how did you do that (kindly, gently, annoyed, guilty, harshly, judgementally)? Did you notice any sensations that accompanied returning the mind? Is this pattern something you recognise in your daily life? We need to take care to offer participants appropriate time to reflect on their experience; the inquiry process is an opportunity offered, but is not compulsory. When the opportunity is taken we follow the lead of each individual in the group, and the inquiry process is perused only as far as they feel comfortable in taking it. As teachers we merely hold the space and occasionally point the way.

­Expanding Understanding into a Wider Context Layer 3

For some participants the awareness of a connection between what they experience in practice and how they interact with daily life seems to evolve naturally. They see clearly that the patterns, habitual thinking, and conditioning that have built over the years are creating the reactivity responsible for producing suffering. Often when asked if they recognize an experience that has arisen in practice they will respond with a resounding ‘yes’, or ‘I see this all the time’, or ‘I have done this for years’. We must be aware that although this is an important learning process, it can also be distressing if an individual has suffered for a prolonged period of time with, say, anxiety or depression the realization of repeated behaviour that has exacerbated the condition can sometimes be expressed with regret and sadness, a grieving for the time lost. However, seeing where we are

The Inquiry Process

‘caught’ or ‘held’ through a particular way of relating to experience is a potentially transformative insight. As teachers we can at times become attached to the arising of insight and this could lead us to assume that an individual or the group is at a certain stage of understanding within the programme; we need to remember that the individuals within the group are all learning at a pace that is right for them. Indeed, some may only begin to truly understand and make progress long after they have completed the programme, nevertheless, we have sown the seeds of mindfulness, and with regular practice awareness and understanding will develop. It is a delicate and demanding skill for the teacher to hold the space for participants to naturally find the link between learning and their lives, whilst at other times supporting others by offering teaching and encouragement. It is central to maintaining participants’ motivation that we reinforce that the programme unfolds in various ways and at different time scales for each individual, and that wherever they are right now is exactly where they are supposed to be. In addition to linking learning to daily life there is also the issue of individuals working with particular issues such as anxiety, depression, panic disorder, and chronic pain. The teacher, whilst taking into consideration each particular challenge with which participants may be working, mainly facilitates the process of integrating understanding through grounding it in an exploration of direct experience. The shifting group dynamics due to the varied levels of progress of participants will need to be managed carefully and sensitively by the teacher. Those that experience positive shifts in their lives can become eager to share in inquiry; others may close down, or remain quiet, if they see themselves as failing in some way. The material we work with in inquiry is mainly provided by participants, the teacher is adding that which supports the understanding and learning points. When difficulties arise for some in practice asking the question, ‘what did you choose to do?’ can reveal their intention, what options they considered, and choices they made, rather than overemphasizing the difficult. We are encouraging gentle exploration, perhaps defusing the reactivity to difficulty by exploring what has transpired in the moment. Bringing mindfulness into daily life has been encouraged from the early stages of the programme, with eating practices and working with routine activities. Participants may have noticed that by paying careful attention and bringing awareness to simple tasks that their experience can be transformed. This is empowering in terms of learning to work with difficulties, a new approach, another way, the beginnings of a trust in the process. Ultimately, a way of being that holds potential in terms of decreasing a sense of feeling overwhelmed and allowing life with all its rigours and tribulations, health issues, and demands to be perhaps a little more manageable. There is a rich tapestry of learning that weaves its way

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through people’s lives, from noticing how they are managing stress in new ways, a more responsive approach to communicating, bringing a reflective process to making decisions, and learning to tune in to the mind and body to promote wiser choices that support well‐being.

­ mploying Vertical and Horizontal Methods E of Inquiry The two methods used within a group inquiry are described as vertical and horizontal (Rockman, 2012–15). When we use the term vertical we are describing an interaction between the teacher and one participant. This opens the possibility of introducing the relevant teaching points that will not only benefit that particular individual, but also the group as a whole. By establishing the connection between thoughts, emotions, and sensations with one participant, the other group members may notice the relevance in their own experience. Horizontal inquiry involves inviting the whole group to respond to a particular question, an example of which would be an individual sharing that during practice it was difficult to concentrate due to a busy mind. Utilizing horizontal inquiry you could widen this to ask, ‘did anyone else have difficulty concentrating due to the mind being very active?’ This is particularly useful in early sessions of the programme as it demonstrates that many of our experiences, rather than being specific to the individual are in fact shared human experiences. This can create a sense of reassurance, safety, and belonging, and can be conducive to continued mindfulness practice, whilst the interaction of multiple members of the group will create a more cohesive unit. In these exchanges it is important to use language that is inclusive, reinforcing the commonality of what has just been shared: ‘isn’t it i­nteresting how our minds can do this’ or ‘isn’t that interesting that we find our concentration disturbed in this way’. We then have an opportunity to expand this further by asking, ‘did anyone notice anything different?’ Learning when and where to use vertical and horizontal inquiry will come only from experience; each group we teach is different, and that variance is demonstrated in each session we facilitate.

­Summary To establish an understanding and proficiency in inquiry we must be aware of what is actually happening in our groups from moment to moment. That level of attentiveness arises from our own mindfulness practice. Our reactions to what is being shared can guide us in delivering

The Inquiry Process

an appropriate, sensitive, and skilful response. It is essential to approach the inquiry process with kindness, compassion, curiosity, and a willingness to not know, to stand on the edge of the unknown and trust ­emergence. Remember, it is a lightly held conversation that may or may not produce opportunities to learn; it will unfold in its own time. The learning points and themes that we wish to explore will arise not from our agenda, but from the space we create that allows individuals in our groups to flourish and grow.

­References Ajahn A. (2012). Small boat, great mountain: Theravaden reflections on the natural great perfection. Hemel Hempstead: Amaravati Publications. Crane, R. S., Eames, C., Kuyken, W., Hastings. R. P., Williams, J. M. G., Bartley, T., Surawy, C. (2013). Development and validation of the mindfulness‐based interventions: Teaching assessment criteria (MBI: TAC). Assessment, 20(6), 681–688. doi: 10.1177/1073191113490790. Crane, R. S., Stanley, S., Rooney, M., & Mardula, J. (2014). Disciplined improvisation: Characteristics of inquiry in mindfulness‐based teaching. Mindfulness, 6(5), 1104–1114. doi: 10.1007/s12671‐014‐0361‐8. Kramer, G. (2007). Insight dialogue. The interpersonal path to freedom. Boulder, CO: Shambhala Publications. Rockman, P. (2012–15). The brains and heart of MBCT, handout from Refining Inquiry Workshop, Centre for Mindfulness Studies, Toronto. Segal, Z. V., Williams, J. M. G., & Teasdale, J. D. (2012). Mindfulness‐based cognitive therapy for depression: A new approach to preventing relapse (2nd ed.). New York: Guildford Press. Stahl, B., & Goldstein, E. (2010). A mindfulness‐based stress reduction workbook. Oakland, CA: New Harbinger Publications.

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Owena For years, or to be more realistic my whole life, I have been plagued by anxiety and depression. The things that have troubled me have been shut away behind locked doors. I knew that if I were to begin learning to cope with my anxiety and depression these doors would need to be opened. Over the last three years, thanks to mindfulness, they are now being carefully unlocked and the contents dealt with. Mindfulness has been the glue that has joined everything together, it has allowed me to live and not just exist. It has given me the confidence to move forward where I can, or just leave things as they are. Before I completed the mindfulness programme, I always reached the stage of what to do with the remains left in those dark, dismal rooms. That became a problem and created even more anxiety. Mindfulness has given me the confidence to just ‘let it be’. Through attending the programme I now have the confidence to use my wheelchair and to enjoy the freedom that it gives me. I have started sewing again, making cakes for my grandchildren, going to the theatre, and live music events. All the things I loved doing and am now enjoying again. The mindfulness practices of sitting meditation and body scan have now become a part of my daily life. I can still feel my anxiety arising, but can now accept that although it is there I can live with it and not let it rule me.

Living Mindfully: Discovering Authenticity through Mindfulness Coaching, First Edition. Gary Heads. © 2017 John Wiley & Sons, Ltd. Published 2017 by John Wiley & Sons, Ltd.

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5 ­ oving Out of Automatic Pilot and Being More M Aware of Our Bodies ­Week 1 Rationale

Developing mindfulness begins in the first session with the simple act of noticing, becoming aware of sensations in the body, and learning to ­recognize our tendency to drift into autopilot. The core practice in this session is the body scan; this provides the opportunity for participants to move their attention around the body and notice the ease or difficulty that arises when they engage in this way. Whilst the inclusion of an eating meditation encourages the development of beginner’s mind, and informs us that by paying attention and being mindful of our experience, we can potentially transform that experience. We are also setting out our intention to commit to practice and through that practice to become more aware. Themes Within the Session

When introducing the course it is important that we reinforce the guidelines emphasized in orientation, as this will create strong foundations for a supportive environment. The significance of automatic pilot is central to the learning we wish to impart in this session, noticing the mind has wandered and bringing it back to practice not only strengthens our awareness, but also offers the opportunity to introduce the attitudes of kindness and compassion when working with difficulties. Developing moment‐by‐moment attention does not only reinforce how awareness has the potential to change our experience, but it can also help us to determine that in reality the present moment is actually all we have to observe and make choices.

Living Mindfully: Discovering Authenticity through Mindfulness Coaching, First Edition. Gary Heads. © 2017 John Wiley & Sons, Ltd. Published 2017 by John Wiley & Sons, Ltd.

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Mindfulness and Automatic Pilot

Probably the most quoted definition of mindfulness is the one you will find in Full Catastrophe Living by Jon Kabat‐Zinn (1990): ‘Mindfulness is paying attention, in a particular way, in the present moment, and non‐judgmentally.’ Alternatively, you could define mindfulness as a way of developing the intention to pay careful attention to our experience, without judging, labelling it as good or bad, or deciding whether it is negative or positive. Although it can sometimes be difficult to comprehend, mindfulness is really not about trying to get anywhere, it is more about being aware of our experience and accepting where we are, and how we are, in any given moment. Our intention is to slow down the experience of ordinary, everyday activities, so that by knowingly bringing awareness to those activities we can begin to notice the small changes in thoughts, perceptions, emotions, feelings, and physical sensations that are linked to mood and mind states. If we are able to do this, we can open up the possibility of learning new ways to respond to these experiences. The skill we endeavour to promote in the first week of the programme is the ability to notice, to see our experience clearly, whatever that happens to be. Noticing is something that came naturally to us as children, but as we have grown older, and become more susceptible to the busyness created by the demands of modern‐day living, that ability has diminished. By living our lives at what can seem like an ever‐increasing pace, we can dilute the ability to pay attention, to notice. When we are inattentive and do not notice what we are doing, the mind can wander into autopilot with little or no awareness of what is arising in the moment. An activity that seems to activate mind wandering for many can be driving. On a trip to a familiar place or embarking on a long journey, how often do we find ourselves zoning out? Sometimes arriving with little or no recognition of where we have been. In these situations our minds can simply switch out of the moment, be it through boredom or familiarity, or because we have something on our mind, but instead of paying attention we wander into the past or the future. There are many examples in daily life when we slip into automatic pilot. Any repetitive tasks or chores can instigate this process; we can zone out of a conversation, or what is being said on television or radio, or maybe have to re‐read a page in a book because our mind is elsewhere. When we drift into automatic pilot our awareness of what is actually going on around or within us can be impaired. This can make us more susceptible to being caught out by events or becoming stressed or anxious by the thoughts, feelings, emotions, and sensations that are arising. These ‘automatic’ reactions may be based on old, unhelpful habitual thinking that serves only to lower mood and increase stress. By increasing awareness of what is actually happening in each moment we can learn to respond to experience and perhaps see clearly the patterns of thinking that have caused problems in the past. In other words, awareness allows us to make wiser choices and gives us the freedom to make those choices.

­Moving Out of Automatic Pilot and Being More Aware of Our Bodie

If we accept that driving resonates with many of us as an automated task, then eating could perhaps come a close second. To demonstrate how much we notice, and how much we can miss when we are not fully present, an eating meditation is introduced in session 1. The item of food we tend to use in this practice is a raisin or grape. Participants are invited to bring an attitude of beginner’s mind to this activity, to imagine that they have never seen these objects before. The practice is as follow:

­Exercise: Eating Meditation Choosing

Participants are invited to choose two grapes, and then to hold them in the palm of the hand. As we are exploring with beginner’s mind, the grapes should be referred to as objects. Participants are then encouraged to notice how it feels to have these objects resting in the hand, becoming aware of the weight and temperature. They are then invited to choose one, and to hold that object between forefinger and thumb. Seeing

The invitation is to then explore the object as if for the very first time. Allowing a sufficient period to explore the shape and colour, how the colour changes when caught in the light, any blemishes and ridges, and encouraging participants to really pay careful attention to this unique object. Touching

Noticing how it feels to hold the object between the finger and thumb, noticing its texture. Perhaps rolling the object with the finger and thumb to bring awareness to the shape. Hearing

If we were investigating this object for the first time we would have no awareness of whether it makes a sound or not. Therefore, we can suggest placing the object to the ear and shaking or squeezing it to discover if indeed there is a sound. Smelling

Then choosing to move the exploration from listening to smelling by bringing the object to the nose and checking out whether it transmits any kind of odour.

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Placing

Before progressing to the next element of this practice, it is suggested that you check your participants are fine to move the object towards the mouth, perhaps using the words ‘if you are ok with this’. Then, making the suggestion to move the object to within an inch of the mouth and to just hold it there. As the object is held in this position, there may be an opportunity for participants to explore any physical sensations that might be arising in the body. Then, before we move to the next step, it is recommended that we reinforce the voluntary nature of this practice by asking if our group are comfortable with placing the object in the mouth, and allowing it to rest there for a short while. We can again remind our participants to explore any sensations that are arising in the body as the object rests on the tongue. Tasting

Now beginning the process of eating the object by taking just one bite, and bringing attention to all the sensations that are created by this one simple act. After allowing sufficient time to explore the sensations that have arisen from biting into the object, progressing now to chewing slowly, remembering to be mindful of taste, texture, and sensations a­ rising in the body. Swallowing

When it feels appropriate to do so, choosing to swallow the object and noticing any sensations as the object moves down the body. The eating meditation can reveal the richness of each moment when we pay attention; on the flip side it also reminds us how much we miss when we are not fully present. This relatively simple practice demonstrates the potential of being aware in each moment, slowing down, paying attention, and noticing, how this can transform not only our everyday experiences, but also the effects those experiences have upon us. It is not uncommon after completing this practice for participants to share their surprise at how much they have discovered by following this sequence. They can be fascinated by the shape, colour, and previous unawareness of tiny ridges. They can be completely startled by the intensity of flavour, and the contrast between hard outer casing and smooth inner texture. Often, participants will share that it was probably the nicest grape they have eaten, the most flavoursome, and that usually in the time taken to complete that practice they would have eaten a handful of grapes.* *If a participant has an aversion to grapes, or suffers from a psychological disorder that makes this exercise difficult, it can be useful for them to notice how it felt not to do the practice. The item of food used to demonstrate autopilot can vary, a raisin is commonly used, and was the item of choice in the original eight‐week MBSR programme.

­Moving Out of Automatic Pilot and Being More Aware of Our Bodie

It is worth taking a moment to reflect upon these statements, if we can miss so much when eating a grape what might we be unaware of throughout each day as our lives unfold? Considering then the transformative qualities of paying attention, how might the experience of life change if we are fully present for more of our moments? Throughout the programme the intention is to be awake and aware for more of our experiences. One of the things that can get in the way of being ‘fully present’ in those experiences is the automatic tendency to make judgements about what is happening or, more accurately, about our perception of what is happening. We are inclined to label experiences as being ‘good’ or ‘bad’, or completely ignore them by drifting into ‘automatic pilot’. When we are learning to meditate, to pay attention, we can be harsh and unforgiving in the judgements we make about ourselves; we can be critical in appraising how we are doing. This could include thinking that the mind wanders too much, and so making judgements such as ‘I am not good at this’, ‘my concentration is poor’, ‘I should be able to focus on the breath’, or ‘if I had organized my day, I could have done this earlier’. These arising judgements can be accompanied by thoughts about blame, needing to change in some way, inadequacy, or other habitual and familiar pathways of thought, feelings, and emotions. While we are lost in this journey of old habitual patterns that we recognize, and are so well acquainted with, our attention to the present moment and the freedom to choose how to respond can disappear. The first step in moving away from these unhelpful and habitual judgements is to practice acknowledging the reality of the experience, what is actually happening, the truth. We can so easily become attached to wanting things to be different or better, however, can we actually see and feel the experience as it actually is, rather than needing to fix or change it? The body scan meditation offers the prospect of developing mind and body awareness, and to notice the fluidity of experience in each moment.

­The Body Scan The body scan meditation used in the Living Mindfully Programme is a variation on a traditional Burmese practice called ‘sweeping’. The original method involved tuning into a sensation in a narrow horizontal band, and then slowly bringing it down the body, almost like a computed tomography scan (CAT scan) (‘Vipassana Meditation’). The body scan is the first core mindfulness practice to be introduced, and is an ideal opportunity to bring awareness and acceptance to arising experiences as participants move their attention around different areas of the body. The words we use to encourage this gentle exploration are

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‘friendly curiosity’, being interested in whatever sensations or lack of ­sensations happen to be arising, as we scan through the body. During the body scan participants often have experiences such as mind wandering, physical discomfort, boredom, irritation, or a sense of being calm. All these arising sensations and feelings are judged to be equally welcome, they are there to be noticed, rather than to be changed or repressed. Unlike most things in life we engage in, there is no goal to be achieved in the body scan, no end result. There is nothing to do but notice the experience of sensations in the body, and when we are distracted. Whenever we become aware that the focus has moved away from the body scan choosing to gently return the attention to the practice. Regardless of what happens, participants are encouraged to just engage with the practice, there is no right or wrong way to do it. If we fall asleep, drift into thinking, lose track of where we are, or experience very little in the way of sensations, the guidance is to simply be aware of the experience in each moment. It is important to remember that initial experiences of the body scan can produce barriers to continued practice. If the experience is one of calmness or relaxation this can produce ­judgements that can impact upon future practice, participants can often become attached to feeling relaxed, thereby thinking that they are succeeding. This can lead to thoughts about having done it right, and may introduce an element of striving. Trying to reproduce the sensation of relaxation can result in the creation of a goal; this opens the misguided possibility of failure. Equally, an initial experience of constant mind ­wandering, irritation, and feeling agitated can influence participants to think that they are not doing it right. With this in mind, it is therefore important to encourage participants to cultivate an attitude of gentleness when exploring experiences, bringing beginner’s mind and curiosity to whatever is arising, not judging or striving, but just noticing. It is particularly important to encourage letting go of any thoughts about needing to do the body scan in a special way, of somehow succeeding or doing well. Perhaps supporting the attitude of accepting thoughts, feelings, and physical sensations, whether pleasant or unpleasant, as ‘just the way things are in this moment’. Guidance for the Body Scan

In the first week of the programme participants are invited to practice the body scan. This practice can be completed either by lying on the floor, supported by a yoga mat, blanket, and cushions, or if this is difficult, they can choose to complete the practice sitting in a chair. If seated, it is important that the feet are placed firmly on the floor, but if this is difficult, a cushion can be positioned under the feet to give a sense of stability

­Moving Out of Automatic Pilot and Being More Aware of Our Bodie

and groundedness. Having a blanket regardless of what position has been adopted is useful, as participants can feel cold at the end of a body scan practice. If the position of choice is to lie on the floor, then the instructions given are to have the legs straight with the feet falling away from each other. The exception to this would be anyone with a back problem where raising the knees may be more appropriate. The arms can be positioned alongside the body with the palms of the hands facing upwards or alternatively resting on the abdomen, the head is usually placed on a cushion. If a chair is being used, then the position taken here is referred to as a dignified posture. This would involve the feet being placed on the floor, the back straight but at ease, placing the hands in a comfortable position, and having the head balanced on the body. Both these postures are subject to the participant’s physical limitations, and should be suggestions rather than compulsory. The guidance around posture is offered as a guideline, the participant should always be regarded as the expert when it comes to making choices around posture and their current physical limitations.

­Transcript: The Body Scan Moving into Practice

Begin the body scan practice by allowing the eyes to gently close, and commence this journey of exploration by establishing a sense of how it feels to be lying on the floor or sitting in the chair. Notice any physical sensations that are arising, perhaps an awareness of touch or pressure from lying on the mat, from the blanket resting on the body, or from having the head on a cushion. If sitting in a chair, perhaps noticing sensations that are arising from the body being supported by the chair, and from having the feet placed on the floor. Remember that there is no right or wrong way to do this practice, we are simply bringing awareness to sensations in the body just as they are in this moment. We are not looking to change them in any way, nor trying to create a certain state such as feeling relaxed. There may be periods in this practice when there are no sensations present, this is absolutely fine, it is simply the experience in the moment. Bringing Attention to the Breath

Now, shifting awareness to the breath as it moves through the body, notice any physical sensations that are created by the body breathing. This can be done by paying attention to the breath at the abdomen, noticing the rising and falling of the breath in this area of the body. It is

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fine, however, to observe the breath in the chest, mouth, or nose if this is where it is sensed most prominently. Taking a few moments to be with the in‐breath and out‐breath moment by moment, however it ­happens to be. Exploring Sensations in the Body

When ready, gather the attention and move it down through the body, into the left leg and out to the toes on the left foot. Endeavour to bring an attitude of curiosity, and beginner’s mind to this gentle exploration, and allow any sensations to just arise. There is no need to move the toes to create sensations, simply pay attention and bring awareness to whatever is arising in the way of physical sensations right now. If the experience is to draw a blank when exploring the toes on the left foot, then that is the experience in this moment. Narrow the spotlight of attention and explore any sensations in each individual toe, perhaps from the toes touching each other, or from the spaces in between the toes. Investigating any arising sensations in and around the toes on the left foot, this could include tingling, numbness, warmness, coolness, or an awareness of no sensations at all. Then, on an in‐breath, imagine the breath moving down through the body and out to the toes on the left foot, and on an out‐breath imagine the breath moving back up the body until it is released through the nose. The next time an out‐breath is taken, allow the attention to dissolve and release any awareness of the toes on the left foot. Shift attention now to the bottom of the left foot, including the sole, instep, and heel. Perhaps noticing sensations created by the bottom of the left foot making contact with the floor or the mat. The mind will inevitably wander away from this practice; it is helpful to accept that this is normal and to be expected. It is certainly not a mistake, as it is the nature of the mind to wander. When noticing that the mind has wandered away, perhaps choose to acknowledge where it has gone. For example, the mind could have drifted into remembering, or planning, become lost in thoughts about work, or worrying. When awareness arises that attention is no longer placed on the body scan, simply return to the practice and begin again. Now, expand the attention once more, and this time explore the sides of the left foot and the top of the left foot. Become aware of not only sensations arising on the surface, but also potentially inside the left foot. Shift the attention to the left ankle, and bring awareness to any sensations in this area of the body. Then, on the next in‐breath, direct that breath down into the left foot and, on an out‐breath, allow the left foot to evaporate from awareness.

­Moving Out of Automatic Pilot and Being More Aware of Our Bodie

Continue the practice by focusing the attention on the lower left leg, the shin, and calf. Notice any sensations here, perhaps noting tightness or looseness, warmth or coolness, always remembering that to feel no ­sensations is fine, it is an experience in itself. Now, on an in‐breath, breath into the lower left leg and, on an out‐ breath, release this area of the body from awareness. Work in this way to systematically guide the attention to all the parts of the body, bringing an attitude of friendly curiosity and gentle exploration wherever possible. Remember at regular intervals that the mind will wander and that this is normal. It can be helpful if a particular part of the body is tense or painful to explore breathing into that area, and having a sense of letting go, or softening on the out‐breath, before returning to the practice when the time seems right to do so. Although it has been highlighted that thoughts can be distractions, it could just as easily be physical sensations or sounds that pull the attention away from the practice. Left knee

Pay attention to the kneecap, sides of the knee, and the back of the knee. This is an area of the body that can be painful for some individuals, so take time to gently check in on any sensations that are arising in the left knee. Left thigh

This is a heavier part of the body, so perhaps heaviness will be noticed; there may also be an awareness of sensations emanating from contact with the floor, or the chair, or clothing. Then, on an in‐breath, guide the breath into the whole of the left leg and, on an out‐breath, release this part of the body from awareness. Take a moment now to gather the attention once more, and move that attention across the pelvis and right out to the toes on the right foot. Right foot

As with the left foot, explore the toes, bottom of the foot, sides, top of the foot, and ankle. Right leg

Exploring the lower right leg, including the shin and calf, right knee, and right thigh. Pelvis, buttocks, and hips

Moving attention to any sensations that are arising in the pelvis, buttocks, and hips. There may be an awareness of sensations from contact with the mat, floor, or chair, always remembering that when the mind drifts into

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thinking, simply return the attention to the body scan and begin again wherever that happens to be. Lower, middle, and upper back

Connect with any sensations in the lower back, perhaps from contact with the floor or chair. As this is an area of the body that can be uncomfortable, or painful, just touching in if it is possible to whatever is there, in this moment. Shoulders

This is an area of the body that can react to stress by producing tension or tightness. Allow the opportunity to ‘check in’ and notice if this is indeed the experience, or maybe the shoulders are relatively at ease. Abdomen

Shift the attention down the body into the abdomen, this is an area that can potentially hold many sensations; it is certainly an area where anxiety can manifest for many individuals. It also affords the possibility of being with the breath, including an awareness of the rhythmic properties of the body as it breathes. The chest

Now, moving from the abdomen to the chest, resting the attention in this area. Perhaps noticing the breath as the lungs do their work or an awareness of the heart beating. Shifting the attention from the chest back to the shoulders, and then moving down both arms, into the hands, and out to the tips of the fingers on both hands. Hands

Begin the exploration of potential sensations here by paying attention to the tips of the fingers and thumbs. Then, expand to the fingers and thumbs themselves, including the spaces in between. Paying attention to the back and palms of the hands, perhaps noticing sensations of tingling, numbness, moisture, or dryness. Eventually, bringing the attention to the wrists, sensations here may include a sense of the pulse or the touch of clothing. Forearms, elbows, upper arms, and armpits

Now, allow attention to gently drift into the arms, scanning the forearms, elbows, upper arms, and armpits. Again, perhaps noticing contact with the floor, mat, chair, sensations created from clothing, or air on bare arms.

­Moving Out of Automatic Pilot and Being More Aware of Our Bodie

Now, breathing into the arms and hands on an in‐breath, and letting go of this area of the body on an out‐breath. When ready, shift the attention once more, this time placing it on the back of the neck. Neck

Take time to scan the back of the neck for any sensations that may be arising in this moment, perhaps noticing sensations arising from having the head resting on a cushion. This is also an area of the body that can hold tension, tightness, and pain, so gently be with whatever is, or is not, arising, and, if possible, not judging the experience, but just noticing. Throat

Letting go of being attentive to sensations in the back of the neck, and moving the attention to the front, to the area of the throat. Notice any sensations that are arising here, perhaps sensations resulting from swallowing? Now, moving the attention once more and this time becoming aware of any sensations in the face, remembering that it is fine to have awareness of no sensations arising in the moment, just as it is fine to discover that we have become lost in thinking. Chin and jaw

Starting the investigation of sensations in the face by first placing attention in the chin and then the jaw, this is another area of the body that can hold stress. Perhaps there are sensations of tightness, tension, or clenching? Or maybe the jaw is at ease? Mouth

Continue now to investigate any sensations both in the inside and outside of the mouth, paying attention to the lips, teeth, gums, tongue, and roof of the mouth. Perhaps experiencing an awareness of the breath if breathing through the mouth. Cheekbones and ears

Bring awareness to the cheekbones, and the inside and outside of the ears. Perhaps noticing any sensations that are created by listening, hearing. Nose

Expanding now to the nose, there may be an awareness of cool air entering the body and warm air leaving the body if breathing through the nose, or sensations relating to pressure, or a tickling sensation.

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Eyes

Progressing the journey by moving the attention to the eye sockets, the eyes, eyelids, eyelashes, and eyebrows. Perhaps noticing an awareness of moisture, dryness, and any sensations that are created from having the eyes closed. Forehead

Shifting attention to the forehead, and bringing interest and curiosity to any sensations that are arising in this area of the body. This is another part of the body that can hold tension, tightness, and pain. Top of the head

Finally, taking the attention to the top of the head, including the scalp and hair. Having scanned the whole body, now shifting the attention to the body as it lies on the floor or sits in the chair. Getting a sense of the body as a whole, and noticing the breath as it flows through the body. Before making the transition into beginning to move, it can be interesting to bring awareness to how the body is feeling right now. Having a sense of any intentions to move the body in a certain way. This could be opening the eyes, or ­wiggling the fingers or toes, or it may be that the message from the body is to stay still, so giving permission to do just that for a while longer. A recording of the body scan practice can be downloaded at: http:// www.livingmindfully.co.uk Common Themes from Participant Feedback

Mindfulness begins with noticing and recognizing the tendency to move into autopilot. The body scan provides an opportunity to practice m ­ oving the attention around the body and noticing the ease or difficulty that arises when doing this. It offers an opportunity to learn and practice becoming more aware. However, the human inclination is to judge ­experiences that arise when practising the body scan. Although the guidance states over and over that there is no right or wrong way to do this practice, participants commonly provide feedback concerning success and failure. No Sensations

For some, the experience of bringing awareness to sensations in the body can produce a multitude of experiences, however, for others the experience is to draw a blank, to have very little or no sensations. It is important to clarify that whatever is arising in awareness is simply an experience in the moment, including being aware of no sensations. It should be

­Moving Out of Automatic Pilot and Being More Aware of Our Bodie

emphasized that there is no need to move the body to create sensations; can curiosity and interest be brought to resting in an awareness of feeling nothing? How participants actually approach bringing awareness to sensations can be quite diverse, some seem to have a felt sense of what is arising in the body, whilst others share that they were visualizing each part of the body, or moving a colour around each area. This, again, is to be explored as simply an experience, how easily the attention drifts into thinking about sensations rather than actually feeling them. Difficulty Staying Awake

Falling asleep is an experience that can occur often during a body scan. If this is the case, then the instruction given is to return to the practice as soon as this is noticed, and to continue from wherever the practice happens to be. If the encouragement is to just be with the experience, then falling asleep is just that, an experience. However, making judgements when this occurs, deciding that this should not happen, or worrying that some of the practice has been missed are common features from participants. If falling asleep becomes problematic, then experimenting with having the eyes open or sitting in a chair are options. In terms of home practice, practising the body scan at various times of the day can be explored. Mind Wandering

During the body scan the mind will naturally wander away from the practice; that is what minds do. Noticing that the mind has drifted into thinking and therefore away from the practice is an important aspect of any meditation, it builds the skill of awareness. Equally important is how the attention is returned to the body scan, or any other practice; can an intention to bring an attitude of kindness, gentleness, and acceptance be instilled into this process? If it is helpful silently saying ‘thinking’ can be used when this happens, or just labelling the thoughts, for instance, work, family, food, and applying this to whatever or wherever the mind has wandered to. Above all else, undertaking to accept that the mind wandering is not a mistake; in fact, it could be argued that constantly having to return the mind to the practice is like going to the gym. If one repeatedly notices and returns the mind back to the body scan, then the muscle of awareness is being developed. The task is not to stop thoughts from arising, but to learn to recognize them so that a response can be introduced in a skilful way. Difficult Physical Sensations

It is not uncommon for individuals to be referred to the programme with varying levels of chronic pain and this understandably can make participants apprehensive, they may worry about coping with the various

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practices or the rigours of attending on a weekly basis. When approaching a practice it is paramount that choices are considered wisely, including not only which posture to adopt, but also whether to participate in the practice or not. If the decision is made to participate, then individuals must be reminded to look after themselves. Careful attention will need to given to explaining these options, whether to lie on the floor, sit in a chair, or even stand are all possibilities. However, ensuring that participants are ­comfortable overrides trying to stay with a designated posture. Nevertheless, human nature dictates that sometimes the decisions made are incorrect or that the mind overrides the body with thoughts driven by comparison. This could include striving to lie on the floor because everyone else is, making a judgement that we should be able to do things in a certain way, or that we used to be able to do this. Once the practice has begun the intensity of painful areas of the body can act as a magnet, thus drawing attention away from the body scan. As with mind wandering this is not a mistake, it is our experience in the moment, albeit a more difficult sensation to work with. It is fine to move, change position, or be with whatever is arising, perhaps noticing any reactions that result from working with sensations in this way. If attention is repeatedly drawn to a particular part of the body, then undertake to acknowledge this and gently return to the practice. The Following are Often Read to Participants in Session 1

Most people miss their whole lives, you know. Listen, life isn’t when you are standing on top of a mountain looking at a sunset. Life isn’t waiting at the altar or the moment your child is born or that time you were swimming in deep water and a dolphin came up alongside you. These are fragments. Ten or twelve grains of sand spread throughout your entire existence. These are not life. Life is brushing your teeth or making a sandwich or watching the news or waiting for the bus. Or walking. Every day, thousands of tiny events happen and if you’re not watching, if you’re not careful, if you don’t capture them and make them count, you could miss it. You could miss your whole life. (Toni Jordan, 2008) If a particular sensation has been labelled ‘good’, then we try to freeze time right there. We grab onto that particular thought, fondle it, hold it, and we try to keep it from escaping. When we perceive something as ‘bad’ we try to push it away. We try to deny it, reject it, and get rid of it any way we can. We fight against our own experience. We run from the pieces of ourselves. (Bhante Henepola Gunaratana, 2011)

­Moving Out of Automatic Pilot and Being More Aware of Our Bodie

If I had my life to live over, I’d like to make more mistakes next time. I’d relax. I would limber up. I would be sillier than I have been on this trip. I would take fewer things seriously. I would take more chances. I would climb more mountains and swim more rivers. I would eat more ice cream and fewer beans. I would perhaps have more actual troubles, but I’d have fewer imaginary ones. You see, I’m one of those people who live sensibly and sanely hour after hour, day after day. Oh, I’ve had my moments, and if I had to do it over again, I’d have more of them. In fact, I’d have nothing else. Just moments, one after another, instead of living so many years ahead of each day. I’ve been one of those persons who never goes anywhere without a thermometer, a hot water bottle, a raincoat, and a parachute. If I had to do it again, I would travel lighter than I have. If I had my life to live over, I would start barefoot earlier in the spring and stay that way later in the fall. I would go to more dances. I would ride more merry‐go‐rounds. I would pick more daisies. (Nadine Stair, in Canfield & Hansen, 2013)

­Week 1: Home Practise 1)  Body scan: practice the body scan every day. Find the time and the place that best suits daily commitments, and follow the instructions and guidance. 2)  Three mindful breaths: take a moment, pause, and pay attention to three mindful breaths. An in‐breath and an out‐breath count as one breath. Introduce this practice as often as remembered. 3)  A routine activity: choose one simple activity, something that is done every day, and bring mindfulness to this activity. Approach this with the attitude of beginner’s mind, as if for the very first time, just as in the grape exercise. It is important that the activity chosen is repeated daily. Examples of daily activities that might be considered include brushing the teeth, making a drink, getting dressed, taking a shower, washing up, preparing food, stroking the dog, or simply starting the car.

­Summary The first session sets the intention, it is an opportunity to reinforce ­everything that has been discussed in orientation. It lays the foundations from which to build trust, and builds an environment that will support the journey on which participants are embarking. Within this session we

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are inviting the group to develop the act of noticing, to become more aware of experience, and to recognize those moments when they have drifted into automatic pilot. Through participation in practising an ­eating meditation and body scan, the central theme of autopilot can be revealed. The possibility of transforming experiences by exploring with beginner’s mind is also presented in these initial practices. The experiences shared in inquiry from this session sets the tone for future practice; we cannot emphasis enough that there is no objective in the body scan other than to move attention around the body and to notice the ease or difficulty that this creates. If the seeds of curiosity and interest are planted at this stage, then commitment to practice and the ability to become more aware will unfold.

­References Ancient Roots of the U Ba Khin ‘Vipassana Meditation’. Analayo, see at: https://www.buddhismuskunde.uni‐hamburg.de/pdf/5‐personen/ analayo/ancientroots.pdf. Bhante Henepola Gunaratana. (2011). Mindfulness in plain English. Reprinted by arrangement with Wisdom Publications, Inc. Canfield, J., & Hansen, M. V. (2013). Chicken Soup for the Soul (20th Anniversary edition). Cos Cob, CT: Chicken Soup for the Soul Publishing. Jordan, T. (2008). Addition. New York: HarperLuxe. Kabat‐Zinn, J. (1990). Full catastrophe living: Using the wisdom of your body and mind to face stress, pain and illness. New York: Delacorte.

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Annaliese I was diagnosed with depression aged 21, and 22 years later I would still describe myself as suffering with depression. However, since being introduced to mindfulness I no longer seek to be ‘cured’, as my mindfulness practice navigates me through both the good and the depressed times. All my life I felt compelled to analyse the thoughts in my head, believing there was a ‘key’, if only I could get the equation right. In 2012, with my sleep and depression becoming a major problem, I began working with a clinical psychologist who had a particular interest in mindfulness. She helped me to accept that I had an illness and that there was no ‘key’, so I stopped striving. It seemed that accepting a future living with depression allowed me to be more at peace with myself. She referred me to the Living Mindfully Programme and my life changed, forever. Attending the programme and the journey I embarked on is difficult to put into words; however, there are two aspects of the programme that have given me the most comfort. The breath, used in practice as an anchor to centre oneself, is something to cling to when my depression is overwhelming, moments of panic in the night, it will never leave me. The other is beginner’s mind; this gave me the ability to be free of the ego, the thing that drives me in everything I do. The story that I cling to that traps me in behaviours and negative thoughts. Beginner’s mind allows me to see this beautiful world afresh.

Living Mindfully: Discovering Authenticity through Mindfulness Coaching, First Edition. Gary Heads. © 2017 John Wiley & Sons, Ltd. Published 2017 by John Wiley & Sons, Ltd.

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6 ­ eing Present in Mindfulness of the Breath B and the Body in Movement Use the breath as an anchor to tether your attention to the present moment. Your thinking mind will drift here and there, depending on the currents and winds moving in the mind until, at some point, the anchor line grows taut and brings you back. (Kabat‐Zinn, 1990)

­Week 2 Rationale

Through mindfulness of the breath and the body in movement a connection can be established with the body as a place to be with experience. Taking awareness to the breath affords the opportunity to experience holding a narrow focus, whilst broadening the focus to the body offers a wider focus of attention. Being with and honouring the limitations that arise in movement allows the emergence of wisdom to arise. Beginning to notice what we are bringing to experiences can produce a deeper understanding of the attitudes being incorporated into practice. Themes

Mindfulness of the breath and the body in movement offers the prospect of coming home to the body, beginning to observe the patterns of the mind, and learning to explore difficulties and barriers that arise in a new way. How things are perceived, or an unawareness of experiences, g­overns the responses that we make in daily life. Mindful movement can be the gateway to learning how to be less reactive and more responsive to what occurs moment by moment.

Living Mindfully: Discovering Authenticity through Mindfulness Coaching, First Edition. Gary Heads. © 2017 John Wiley & Sons, Ltd. Published 2017 by John Wiley & Sons, Ltd.

Being Present in Mindfulness of the Breath and the Body in Movement

­Mindful Movement Throughout history ancient practices involving the body in movement whether it be yoga, t’ai chi, or qi gong have all been regarded as discipline designed to bring balance and health to the physical, mental, and emotional dimension of an individual (Li & Goldsmith, 2012). Indeed, my own personal practice of qi gong, which I began to address a recurrent shoulder problem, seems to have had remarkable restorative properties, which have continued to this day. The longevity of these practices has produced a wealth of insights, and when practised on a regular basis can produce benefits to both physical and mental health (Salmon, Lush, Jablonski, & Sephton, 2009). It is no surprise therefore that movement should be an integral part of this programme. Mindful movement is simply the practice of mindfulness whilst m­oving the body. In this session attention is focused on the body and breath as simple movements are practised. In addition to mindful movement there is also an opportunity to practice walking meditation. For some the thought of engaging in physical exercise can produce feelings that create aversion and an unwillingness to participate. Movement can be associated with exercise, discomfort or strain, as requiring special equipment, other people to work out with, needing to join a gym or a running club. If this has been the case, then introducing a regular mindful movement practice may be a useful and beneficial alternative. It may be that a regular movement practice, such as yoga, t’ai chi, or qi gong is already a part of daily life. This can create an opportunity to bring the mindfulness attitude of beginner’s mind to the activity, to potentially deepen the p­ractice, and learn anew about the body in movement. The approach conveyed in mindful movement is no different to any other mindfulness practice, we simply allow the practice to be guided by the attitudes of mindfulness as previously discussed: namely, maintaining moment‐to‐moment awareness; not striving to get anywhere; allowing things to be as they are; accepting the way the body and mind is right now; and letting go of any judgements that are arising whenever possible. The stretches used in the programme are relatively simple and easily learned, and when it comes to practising at home all that is needed is a safe space. The movements, although comparatively straightforward, can have very beneficial effects if practised on a regular basis. Regular practice can increase musculo‐skeletal flexibility, physical stability, strength, and balance, as well as helping participants to enter states of deep relaxation and awareness. Many individuals experience a greater serenity and calmness about life in general, improved circulation, better muscle tone, and fewer periods of illness (Ross & Thomas, 2010).

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When practising mindful movement the intention is set to move slowly, deliberately, and consciously; choosing to explore limits and edges, but without the need to push beyond them. Instead, bringing curiosity and interest to this process, dwelling at the boundaries and being with the breath. This requires tuning in to the body and honouring the ‘message’ being received, listening to the body, and being guided as to when to stop and when to avoid doing a posture because of current limitations.

­Transcript: Mindful Movement Introduction

If there are any concerns about engaging in the mindful movement practice, then consultation with a physiotherapist or a GP is recommended. The instructions given here are for guidance only. Throughout the movement practice the emphasis will be on noticing physical sensations in the body, and exploring the subtle movements this  practice creates, really engaging and being with each movement. Choosing to step out of automatic actions and feeling, rather than t­hinking, about arising experiences. Being open and honest with limitations, and embracing the possibilities that are available. Learning to identify with the additional layers that can be added to an experience, including judgements, fears, and desires. Discovering the wisdom to stay with individual boundaries, and perhaps finding a place that resides both mentally and physically between comfort, pain, trepidation, and striving. Having a willingness to explore these boundaries as they actually are, rather than thinking how they are, or fearing how they may be, or how they should be. Working in this way is ­different for each individual, yet bringing kindness and compassion, and being receptive and authentic, can be a universal approach to this practice. Mindful Movement

Begin this practice by adopting a standing mountain posture, and becoming aware of being present, standing here, in this space. Perhaps taking a deeper more pronounced breath to draw attention to the body, standing, breathing, in this moment. Allow the eyes to close if this is comfortable, or alternatively lower the gaze. Connecting with the act of standing, and having an awareness of this posture and the gentle movements the body makes to enable it to simply stand here in stillness. Then, gently, but actively, begin the movements, whilst maintaining that sense of embodiment and connection with each adjustment that is made.

Being Present in Mindfulness of the Breath and the Body in Movement

Start by positioning the feet about hip width apart, and then place the inner sides of the feet together. Take a moment to bring awareness to where the weight is placed across the soles of the feet. Explore the movements that are made in the feet by lifting the toes, spreading them slightly, before gently placing them back down. Notice how it feels to shift the weight from one foot to the other. Resting into the ball pad on one foot, as  the heel is lifted on the other, doing this slowly and purposefully. Then  move all the weight into both ball pads as both heels lift, before softly placing them back down. Being aware of the movements, and noticing how and where they flow through the body. Then, resting back and standing in stillness, before guiding the attention through the legs and noticing any physical sensations here. Shifting awareness to the tilt of the pelvis, and endeavouring to find the neutral tilt by rotating the pelvis slightly forward and then backward; when in a neutral position the pelvis will support the spine. Observing the alignment of the legs, spine, and head, and becoming aware of standing upright, and tall, like a mountain, checking if there is a tendency to lean forward or backward. Getting a sense of extending and lifting through the spine and upper body, and the front and sides of the body, as well as the back and the spine. Encourage the shoulders to ease away from the ears and to roll gently down the back, allowing the arms to rest by the sides of the body. Extend through the arms and down into the fingertips, noticing any sensations as each finger is moved, from the little finger to the thumb. Expand the movements into the arms, perhaps gently rotating, shaking, or swinging the arms. Shrugging the shoulders and then releasing them, as if awakening this part of the body, and engaging with any sensations arising from this movement. Coming once again to standing and stillness. Then drawing the chin in slightly, encouraging length in the back of the neck, and noticing this adjustment throughout the whole of the upper body. Bringing awareness to facial expressions or tightness, and allowing an attitude of softness here. Widening the attention to the whole body standing here, a sense of presence, in this space, an awareness of the physical body as a connection to the present moment, as an anchor. Now moving the mountain posture to a full body stretch and bringing awareness to the whole body, before gathering attention and taking it into the shoulders, arms, and hands. On an in‐breath slowly raise the arms above the head and hold this posture, breathing normally, and when the time feels right to do so, lower the arms on an out‐breath. Continue this movement in ­ ovements the body is making, before time with the breath, exploring the m coming back to the mountain posture. This time, connect with the variations of the stretch by raising the arms and heels, the feet can be hip width apart or joined together. Then lift up

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through the body to the crown of the head, inhaling and extending the arms up as before, placing the weight into the ball pads of the feet, then lifting the heels. If this is not possible, then simply notice the shift in weight. Lift up through the body to extend as far as is comfortable, and on an out‐breath gently shift the weight back down onto the soles of the feet and lower the arms. So, on an in‐breath, lift and extend, breathing normally while holding the posture, then breathing out as the arms are lowered. Feeling the stretch and movement no matter how large or slight, noticing deep within the body to the surface of the skin. Then return once more to the mountain posture. Now, moving into a side stretch. Breathing in, and raising the left arm above the head if this is possible, placing the right hand on the side of the right thigh, or alternatively both hands can be placed on the hips. Breathing out, leaning over to the right side, and resting here as the boundaries of this stretch are visited. Notice if the body is leaning forward or backward, endeavouring to have the body in line with the legs, then return to the mountain posture. Now, on an in‐breath, raise the right arm above the head and bring attention to each gentle transition. Perhaps noticing tightness across the skin, in the muscles, joints, an increase in heartbeat, warmth, or a sense of release from the stretch before returning on the out‐breath to the mountain posture, and repeating this movement on the opposite side of the body. Moving now into a twist, first begin by bringing awareness to the whole posture, from the soles of the feet, and the weight placed here, to the alignment of the legs, pelvis, and the lift in the body. Notice the shoulders, arms, and face, experiencing any sensations that are arising in the body. Try to bring beginner’s mind, interest, and softness to this process, whilst encouraging the hips to be forward facing. On an in‐breath, perhaps stand a little taller and lengthen the spine to create space between the vertebrae. Breathe out and turn the body to the right, making the movement from the base of the spine, through the chest, to the crown of the head. Resting the left hand on the side of the right hip, and the right hand behind the left buttock, allow the arms to move freely with the movement, and, when ready, return to standing on an out‐breath. Then on an in‐breath, again stand a little taller, rotating in the opposite direction on the out‐breath. Keeping the chin in line with the breastbone, and being careful not to overturn in the neck, find a rhythm that suits you, in this moment. Promoting length and straightness along the spine on an in‐breath, and a rotation on the out‐breath, becoming aware of the movements from the centre of the body to the surface of the skin, before returning when ready to a neutral mountain posture.

Being Present in Mindfulness of the Breath and the Body in Movement

Now, moving into a balance, begin this transition by making the c­onnection of the feet placed on the floor and the physical sensations in the body. Becoming aware of the breath and releasing the shoulders away from the ears, drawing in the chin and standing tall. Then, taking the weight mainly into the left foot, whilst lightly resting the right foot on the floor, notice the shifts and movements that occur throughout the body. If it is possible, raise the right leg off the floor and explore the balance by observing the shift in the weight; there is no particular way to balance, just experience it however it happens to be. Then come back to standing once more. Shift the weight onto the other leg, and notice how it feels to repeat this movement on this side of the body. Be aware of any thoughts, emotions, or feelings that are arising, returning attention each time to the body and the movement itself, before eventually coming back to stand in mountain posture. Gently moving now into some spinal curls, beginning by placing the feet about hip width apart, or slightly wider if the hamstrings are tight, and with the knees pointing in the same direction as the feet. Moving downwards on an out‐breath, when in the posture breathe normally, and uncurling and coming back to standing on the in‐breath, making sure to raise the head slowly. On an out‐breath, draw the chin towards the chest, c­urling the shoulders, upper back, lower back and abdomen downward towards the floor, keeping the chin tucked in and allowing the knees to bend if possible. Role down vertebra by vertebra, until the arms and upper body are hanging lightly down towards the floor, like a gentle waterfall. Notice any tightness in the back, bringing curiosity and interest to this experience, perhaps opening and softening as this occurs. It may be that the body moves very little, and that the chin tilts only slightly; accepting this as the experience and exploring the sensations these movements are creating in the body. If there is a chair nearby, it may be more comfortable to allow the hands to rest on the chair rather than down to the floor. Be aware of areas of softness and ease, as well as areas of tightness and discomfort. Resting here, breathing normally and mindfully uncurling on an in‐breath, repeat the movement in time with the breath and, when ready, return to the mountain posture on an in‐breath. Mindfully moving now onto the hands and knees, place the hands underneath the shoulders, spreading the fingers and palms, being aware of the connection with the support, and grounding through the hands. Notice the wrists and the lift up through the arms. Allow the shoulders to ease away from the ears, and bring awareness to the length of the spine. Exploring the neutral tilt of the pelvis, and placing the knees underneath the hips, noting where the shins and the top of the feet connect with the

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support, feeling the support beneath. Reconnecting with the breath, and a sense of the breath and body in this posture. The next posture is a cat stretch. Begin by gathering the attention and directing it to the pelvis. Exploring the movements through the spine, and on an out‐breath tilt the pelvis and direct the sitting bones towards the floor, extending the spine like a cat stretching, being with any sensations as the spine is lengthened and extended and the crown of the head is lowered towards the floor. Always remaining sensitive to boundaries in this movement, exploring deep within the body, breathing naturally within the posture, and on an in‐breath, reverse the movement by changing the tilt of the pelvis, lowering the abdomen towards the floor, and lifting the  head towards the ceiling. Continue this movement in time with the rhythm of the breath, then come to the neutral position. From here, moving into a puppy dog pose, bringing the big toes together, knees remaining where they are, and then slowly walking the hands forward. Lengthening through the spine, becoming aware of the length through the arms, and releasing the shoulders away from the ears, as the hands are walked forward as far as is comfortable. Moving the buttocks backwards, keeping them high, and moving gently away from the hands before lengthening through the whole upper body. Then, ­lowering the forehead to the floor, lifting the elbows and wrists off the floor if this is possible, and draw the tummy towards the spine. Breathing naturally, exploring body and breath in motion. Then, walk the hands back to the hands and knees position. Moving now onto the back, becoming aware of the alignment and adjusting to become as straight as possible. Place the soles of the feet on the floor and bend the knees. Then lifting the buttocks a little off the floor, moving them slightly towards the heels before mindfully placing them back down, creating length and space in the spine. Lifting the head and lengthening the back of the neck, before placing the head back down. Bring attention to all the points of contact, and allow the body to release deep into the support on an out‐breath, perhaps getting a sense of presence. Now, keeping both knees bent and moving into a spinal twist, start by bringing the arms to rest at shoulder height, as if making a ‘T’‐shape with the body. On an in‐breath encourage length in the spine, and on an out‐ breath lower both knees together to the right side. Notice the movement in the spine, body, and hips, perhaps turning the neck in the opposite direction to the knees and being aware of any tightness along the way. Gently resting in awareness, with kindness, and opening and softening to the sensations. When the time seems right to do so, bring the knees back to a neutral position on an in‐breath. Then, moving the knees to the left  side and rotating the head to the right, moving on an out‐breath, returning to a neutral position on an in‐breath, connecting with the

Being Present in Mindfulness of the Breath and the Body in Movement

experience of each moment. Dropping beneath any layers of thinking, worrying, or judging, before eventually returning to the neutral position. Finally, finding a resting posture, perhaps drawing the arms back to be by the sides of the body and turning the palms to face the ceiling, if that is comfortable. Encourage the shoulder tips back and the shoulders to move gently away from the ears. Lengthen through the spine and allow the upper torso to rest into the support, bringing awareness to the buttocks and legs, either keeping the knees bent or straightening the legs and r­esting them on the support. Holding the whole body in awareness, resting in stillness, and perhaps noticing a sense of presence. Then moving the attention to the breath, and tuning into the body and breath as one. Finally, ending the practice by guiding the attention through the body, from the crown of the head to the soles of the feet, and bringing the movement practice to a close. A recording of the mindful movement practice can be downloaded from: http://www.livingmindfully.co.uk. Comments from Participants

Kerry: I have a very busy mind; it makes me annoyed and angry at times. I find it difficult to concentrate with all the constant distractions; this was very evident in the body scan practice. However, much to my surprise, mindful movement was very different. For the first time in a long time my mind was relatively still, I felt connected to my body and the movements. I became a little emotional that I had found this stillness, that I could actually pay attention without needing to fight my thoughts. Joanne: I have always regarded myself as being fit and active, I am always busy working, or looking after family. But tuning into my body in the gentle stretches has revealed a different story. My whole body seemed to ache, shoulders were tense, and every muscle seemed tight. I had imagined that the practice would be easy, however, in reality my body told me the opposite. Helen: At first I seemed to be struggling to just balance, this created my anxiety, which made things worse. Eventually, I settled into standing and my breath, and became a little bit less self‐conscious. After a while I became more grounded, steady, I actually began to enjoy the stretches, although I wouldn’t say I was completely free from anxious thoughts. What I did notice was how often I could let those thoughts go, and come back to my body, and the movement, that gave me the confidence to keep going. Craig: I found this initially a difficult practice to engage with, I go to the gym, run, cycle and walk every week, and I regard myself as fit and active. Even before the movement practice began in class my judging mind was

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off, this will be too easy, too slow, boring. During the movements themselves I got frustrated, irritated, and annoyed, I became tense, even anxious about the whole process. That first session did not get any better. What it did do, however, was to show me just how critical and judgemental I am, this same pattern of thinking is there in most things I do, and rather than enjoying the activity I get stressed. John: I had thought long and hard about whether to do the mindful movement or simply sit it out. I had been given that option, and due to a road traffic accident that had left me with limited mobility, not doing anything seemed appealing. In the end I decided to join in using a chair rather than standing; many of the movements I chose not to do, however, the instruction to gently move the head to the left and then right I decided to try. So breathing in, and then moving on an out‐breath, as I have very limited movement in my neck I was only expecting small movements. Bringing awareness to this movement I noticed the usual tension, tightness, and pain, but above all else fear. This was the big moment in the programme for me, moving beyond the fear and anxiety has allowed me to do so much more. Pauline: Whatever I do in my life I have to do it well, if not better than everyone else. Over the years this has caused me no end of stress, anxiety, and low mood. Within minutes of starting the movement practice my competitive streak was in full flow, everything needed to be perfect. After fighting with my frustration and anger rather than actually doing the practice, I eventually began to notice other people in my group just doing what they could, following the guidance, stopping when they needed to. I realized just how hard I am on myself, and that accepting my limitations is actually OK.

­Walking Meditation If you look deeply, you can see all the worries and anxiety people print on the earth as they walk. Our steps are usually heavy, filled with sorrow and fear. We feel insecure, and our steps reveal it. This world has many paths. Some are lined with beautiful trees, some wind around fragrant fields; some are covered with leaves and blossoms. But if we walk on them with a heavy heart, we will not appreciate them at all. When we were one or two, we began to take tottering steps. Now we have to learn to walk again – slowly, with joy and ease. After a few days of practice, you will know how to do it. When I see you walking with deep comfort and peace, I will smile happily. (Thich Naht Hanh, 2013)

Being Present in Mindfulness of the Breath and the Body in Movement

One of the simplest and most accessible forms of meditation is walking practice. However, although simple in principle, this form of meditation is far from easy. It requires that the full attention be focused on the experience of walking, that in each moment there is an awareness of each step. Not just walking, but also knowing the experience of walking. When engaged in the practice of walking meditation it will not be long before the mind begins to wander. It is just as prone to wander when the body is moving as it is in relative stillness, often providing a train of thought that takes us far from the activity of walking. We rarely just go for a walk, even when this is the intention. Walking meditation involves intentionally bringing the attention to the experience of walking, and paying attention to the sensations that are arising in the feet as each step is taken. Sometimes we expand awareness to also include the legs, the whole body moving, or, alternatively, choosing to combine awareness of the breath with the experience of walking. When engaging with this practice, unlike in daily life, there is no intention to get anywhere, there is no destination; the objective is just to simply pay attention to each step. It is enough just to be with each step and knowing in each moment that this is where the attention is placed. It is unlikely that the mind will cooperate with the intention just to be with each step for very long. In this fast‐paced world with all its demands and time constraints the tendency can be to walk relatively quickly. The mind may begin to condemn this whole exercise, deciding that its stupid, useless, idiotic, or a pointless thing to do. It is even conceivable that the mind may start to play games around pace, balance, distraction, encouraging the exploration of visual stimulation, or endeavouring to find something it deems to be more interesting. But with gentle perseverance, and by applying mindfulness, awareness of these distractions can be enhanced and therefore the ability to return the attention to the feet and walking meditation is improved. Practising walking meditation on a regular basis will develop this skill, and will instigate not only the ability to practice slowly in formal practice, but also enhance the ability to bring attention, when remembered, to walking at a more natural pace in daily life. The  awareness acquired from practice may even allow the noticing of sensations in the feet when moving quickly, perhaps not the capability to pay attention to every step, but there is always the option to shift awareness to a sense of the body as a whole moving through space. There are probably circumstances of one kind or another in daily life when there is no option but to walk, whether this appeals or not. These can be wonderful occasions to bring awareness to walking and thereby to transform it from a dull, mostly unconscious chore, into something rich and nurturing. So often, on routine errands, there is the inclination to rush from one task to the next until everything is done. This can be

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exhausting, even depressing, because of the monotony of what is being done; especially if the places visited are the same old places frequented all the time. The mind will crave something new. However, bringing ­awareness to walking during these routine tasks can short‐circuit the automatic pilot mode, and potentially make routine experiences more vivid and more interesting, creating a sense of calmness and being less exhausted at the end (adapted from Full Catastrophe Living, Jon Kabat Zinn, 1990).

­Transcript: Walking Meditation In this practice the intention is to simply bring awareness to the movements of walking, and to be fully present with the experience. There will be times during the day when the opportunity to walk arises, but often there is no awareness of actually walking. We can become preoccupied with thoughts, and therefore lost on autopilot. Paying careful attention and being mindful of this simple act can transform what can be an automatic and uninteresting process into a rich and nurturing experience. When practising formal walking meditation there is no goal or any destination to be reached, we simply arrive in each moment. Eventually, when the skill of walking mindfully has been developed, awareness can then be expanded to bring careful attention to the physical sensations of walking, the breath, and surroundings as the practice is taken into daily life. So now, beginning walking meditation practice by finding a place where you will be undisturbed, where it is relatively quiet, and there is space to walk back and forth for approximately ten to fifteen steps. Coming to stand, with the feet about a hip width apart, letting the arms hang loosely by the sides of the body. Allow the breath to flow freely, just standing here. Beginning this practice with a short body scan to help settle into the practice. Start by taking the attention to the crown of the head, and notice any sensations that are arising here. Move slowly down through the face, forehead, eyebrows, eyes, nose, ears, cheeks, mouth, jaw, chin, before shifting to the entire face and o­pening to any sensations that are arising. Slowly continue to explore sensations as attention is moved down through the body, back of the neck, throat, shoulders, down both arms to the hands, chest, heart and lungs, abdomen, lower back, pelvis, hips, thighs, knees, lower legs, calves and shins, ankles, and then to the feet.

Being Present in Mindfulness of the Breath and the Body in Movement

Explore any sensations created by the feet being in contact with the floor and really place awareness right into those sensations. Feeling the s­upport of the ground beneath, perhaps getting a sense of being rooted or grounded, and opening awareness to the whole body, standing. Now, gently shift all the weight down the left side and into the left leg. Just being present with the sensations that this movement creates, o­pening to the experience. Move the attention now back into both legs so that they are evenly placed, and then slowly shift the weight over to the right leg and, again, opening to any sensations that are here. Come back to centre, and on the next in‐breath slowly raise the right foot. First the heel, then the sole, lifting the toes, moving the foot forward, then, on an out‐breath, place the foot on the ground a short distance in front. Breathing in, take a step with the left foot, raising the heel, the sole, the toes, and then move the foot forward. On an out‐breath, place the foot on the ground. Allow the breath to set the pace of the walking practice, breathing in, lifting the foot and moving, breathing out, placing the foot in front. Lifting, moving, and placing, each foot in rhythm with the breath, c­ontinue in this way to walk slowly with full awareness. When the mind wanders away from the practice, firmly but gently escort the attention back to the breath and the sensations being created by the act of walking. When the end of the walking place is reached, just take a moment to drop into stillness and bring awareness to the sensations that are being created by turning the body. Once more come to stand, before beginning the walking practice again. Perhaps choose at times to take the attention to all the sensations in the feet, being with each step, in each moment. When ready, increase the speed, allowing the breath to just flow n­aturally. Letting go of walking in rhythm with the breath, and bringing attention to sensations in the body whilst walking at a more normal pace, being present with the experience of the body walking, and noticing any sensations that are arising in each movement. After a chosen period of time, gradually slow the pace, remembering to hold awareness of sensations as this is done, and return the attention to matching the pace of walking to the flow of the breath. When it is time to end the walking practice, bring the feet together and draw the practice to a close. A recording of the walking practice can be downloaded from: http:// www.livingmindfully.co.uk.

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Comments from Participants

Lynne: At first I found this practice difficult, even though I do lots of gentle walking each day. I felt I couldn’t get the movement and breath to flow together, I somehow forgot how to breathe when I concentrated on placing and moving my feet. I’ve always been quite observant but now I can spend ages, whilst w­alking, looking at colours, leaves, textures, lights, etc. I enjoy nature and when no one is looking I love shuffling through the autumn leaves. Somehow I must have remembered how to breathe, and tune into s­ensations in my feet. Andrea: I found the practice of walking meditation a strange concept when it was first introduced into the programme. It was so slow, and my mind was so far ahead of each step I found it very difficult to concentrate on actually walking. It did, however, make me realize just how fast my mind goes. I am now finding walking meditation to be very beneficial, you do have to keep at it, and like anything new, it takes practice. After getting past my initial difficulties, I now find myself dropping into walking mindfully both at home and also when I am outside. Amanda: The walking meditation drove me crazy at first; I was very irritated by the slow pace. However, once I had learned to accept that irritation and stay with the practice, I found that I could do it at any pace, whether I was strolling or rushing around. It makes me smile to think that nobody around me knows that I’m doing it, that’s the great thing. They might be doing it too and I wouldn’t know, but I can pick out the people who aren’t doing it … And I recognize that I used to be one of them. Elaine: My experience of attending the mindfulness programme was a very positive one, learning the walking meditation has stayed with me, and it is something I practice everyday. I just find myself now taking the time to walk mindfully, and it’s liberating. Emma: This is the practice where I have found a real sense of stillness, a quieter mind, and a connection with the body. I have found walking meditation so useful, especially at work. Work is my stressful place, the root on my anxiety, however, when I notice I am getting tense and wound up, I turn to walking, even a short practice from one office to another can sometimes reduce my anxiety to a more manageable level. Richard: I am prone to my anxiety spiralling into panic attacks, especially if I have to go somewhere new and meet people I don’t know. Unfortunately, in my job this happens often. The first time that the walking meditation impacted upon this was when I arrived at an unfamiliar venue. It was very

Being Present in Mindfulness of the Breath and the Body in Movement

crowded, and I had to walk up a steep set of steps to get to the entrance. All the signs of an impending panic attack were there, racing heartbeat, sweating, pulse, and shaking. In that moment, I remembered my practice, and walked up the stairs as mindfully as I could. When I reached the top my anxiety was still at a high level, but I wasn’t in panic mode. The following is often read to participants in session 2: You do not have to be good.

You do not have to walk on your knees for a hundred miles through the desert, repenting. You only have to let the soft animal of your body love what it loves. Tell me about despair, yours, and I will tell about mine. Meanwhile the world goes on. Meanwhile the sun and the clear pebbles of the rain are moving across the landscapes, over the prairies and the deep trees, the mountains and the rivers. Meanwhile the wild geese, high in the clean blue air, are heading home again. Whoever you are, no matter how lonely, the world offers itself to your imagination, calls to you like the wild geese, harsh and exciting, over and over announcing your place in the family of things. (‘Wild Geese’, Mary Oliver)

­Week 2: Home Practice 1)  Mindful movement: on three days either practice mindful movement or walking meditation. 2)  Body scan: on the other three days practice the body scan. 3)  A routine activity: choose another routine activity to add to the m­indful repertoire.

­Summary The body in movement can provide the opportunity to be with experience in new and more accepting ways. We can learn to develop the skill of attention by alternating between a narrow focus when observing the breath, and a wider focus when attending to the body. We can notice and work with attitudes that are being brought to practice, especially around difficulties and limitations, learning to explore barriers in a wiser and more accepting manner. The accessibility of walking meditation should not be overlooked as it is an ideal opportunity to begin to take practice into daily life.

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­References Kabat‐Zinn, J. (1990). Full catastrophe living: Using the wisdom of your body and mind to face stress, pain and illness. New York: Delacorte. Li, A. W., & Goldsmith, C. A. (2012). The effects of yoga on anxiety and stress. Alternative Medicine Review, 17(1), 21–35. Oliver, M. (1994). Dream Work. New York: Atlantic Monthly Press. Ross, A., & Thomas, S. (2010). The health benefits of yoga and exercise: A review of comparison studies. Journal of Alternative and Complementary Medicine, 16(1), 3–12. Salmon, P., Lush, E., Jablonski, M., & Sephton, S. (2009). Yoga and mindfulness: Clinical aspects of an ancient mind/body practice. Cognitive and Behavioral Practice, 16(1), 59–72. Thich Nhat Hanh. (2013). The long road turns to joy: A guide to walking meditation. Berkeley, CA: Parallax Press.

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Sue I was diagnosed with bipolar disorder when I was 20 years old, and have suffered from chronic joint pain since I was a teenager. I have tried lots of different ways to help manage my pain, and so when the mindfulness programme was mentioned I was quite cynical, but I thought I would give it a go. It has been transformational: the biggest thing has been the way it has changed my relationship with the pain. I cannot run away from my pain; so I need to accept it  –  even build a friendship with it. On bad days, it can be scary; but my mindfulness practice has helped me to just be in the moment. I can find a degree of self‐acceptance and of being kind to myself. That was a massive shift. I have incorporated mindfulness into my daily life, practising the body scan and breathing space; this allows me to pause and to focus my attention on the breath. I remember to stop, notice, and recognize that ‘the world is a bigger place, and we are all part of it’.

Living Mindfully: Discovering Authenticity through Mindfulness Coaching, First Edition. Gary Heads. © 2017 John Wiley & Sons, Ltd. Published 2017 by John Wiley & Sons, Ltd.

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7 ­ taying Present and Dealing with Difficult S Thoughts and Emotions ­Week 3 Rationale

The mind is at its most agitated and troubled when it is in the process of trying to avoid some experiences, or alternately trying to hold on and thereby clinging to other experiences. Reacting to experiences by clinging or with aversion can create difficulties. Mindfulness can, however, offer an alternative to this reactivity, a way to stay present; it has the capacity to disarm the desire to push away or cling to experience, and it can present the opportunity to hold the difficulty in the ‘vessel’ of wider awareness. It is possible to take a wider perspective, and to relate differently to thoughts, feelings, and emotions. By becoming aware of more effective ways of responding to the stressors in life, the prospect arises of learning to reduce unhelpful reactions and to promote more responsive choices. Themes

By learning to stay present with difficult thoughts and emotions, awareness and attention can be practised in different ways. Utilizing all the senses, and beginning to explore the experiences of attachment and aversion, the insights that allow us to discover alternative perspectives may be produced. There is a story about a woman running away from tigers. She runs and runs, and the tigers are getting closer and closer, when she comes to the edge of a cliff. She sees some vines there, so she

Living Mindfully: Discovering Authenticity through Mindfulness Coaching, First Edition. Gary Heads. © 2017 John Wiley & Sons, Ltd. Published 2017 by John Wiley & Sons, Ltd.

Staying Present and Dealing with Difficult Thoughts and Emotions

climbs down and holds on to the vines. Looking down, she sees that there are tigers below her as well. She then notices that there is a mouse gnawing away at the vine to which she is clinging. She also sees a beautiful little bunch of strawberries close to her, ­growing out of a clump of grass. She looks up and looks down. She looks at the mouse. Then she just takes a strawberry, puts it in her mouth, and enjoys it thoroughly. (Pema Chödrön, 2004) The above may be an extreme example, but difficult and unpleasant moments are a natural part of daily life, they inhabit unfolding experiences alongside those experiences that give pleasure. Many life events are simply beyond any kind of control, despite the efforts made. However, that does not mean that there is no say in the effect they have. It is often how life’s difficulties are viewed and what action is taken as a consequence that makes the difference between difficult experiences ruling and controlling thinking, life in general, or the possibility of relating more lightly to them. By becoming more aware of thoughts, emotions, feelings, and physical sensations that arise through life’s events, so the possibility of freeing ourselves from habitual and automatic reactions opens up. This then creates the choice of responding mindfully, and in a more skilful and creative way. In general, the tendency is to react to experiences in one of the following ways: Indifference

By this it is inferred that the content of the present moment is deemed irrelevant and so the mind switches or zones out, wandering off somewhere else, ‘lost in thought’. Attachment

This is the desire to hold on to experiences that are happening right now, or wanting to have experiences that are not occurring in this moment. Aversion

The need to get rid of experiences that are arising or avoiding experiences that may be coming along that are not wanted. The above are all reactions that can cause problems, particularly the tendency to react to unpleasant feelings with aversion. At this stage it is simply the intention to become more aware of experiences. This will create the possibility of responding in a more mindful way, rather than engaging with automatic reactions.

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­Sitting Meditation If the sitting meditation is practised on a regular basis then the opportunity may arise to notice the attention drifting away from an awareness of the present moment. It can then be noted with curiosity and an attitude of friendliness what it was that drew the attention away, and with gentle discipline bring the attention back to moment‐by‐moment awareness. Guidance for Sitting Meditation

The posture recommended for practising sitting meditation is one that signifies dignity; what is meant by this suggestion is a posture that sets the intention to be awake, and to be aware, if this particular posture is adopted it may also enable the breath to flow more freely through the body. Whether the choice is to sit on a straight‐backed chair, or a cushion, or meditation stool, it is helpful to assume this posture; however, it is wise to consider any physical limitations when deciding on which position is best for practice. Ideally, the feet will be firmly placed on the floor; this gives a sense of being grounded, a sense of being here, right now. Allow the back to be straight, but not ramrod straight, just let the spine follow its natural curve and alignment, and, finally, have the head balanced on the body. It is sometimes helpful to imagine that the head is being held by a piece of string that is attached to the crown, and that this is gently lifting the whole body upward. Let the hands rest wherever they feel comfortable – this could be right hand inside left hand on the lap, palms up or down, or resting the hands on the thighs.

­Transcript: Sitting Meditation Moving into Practice

To begin the regular practice of sitting meditation, it is best to invest the time on a consistent basis. It is important to find a place to practice that is conducive to comfortably stilling the body and that is not open to interruptions. This time can be viewed as a time that is set aside from the usual mode of constantly ‘doing’, it is an opportunity to allow the emergence of ‘non‐doing’, to simply be, bringing awareness to experiences that arise whenever possible, from one moment to the next. It is helpful if an intention is set not to be judgemental, to bring patience and kindness to the observation of experiences in the body and the mind as they occur. So, now, moving into practice by coming to sit in an upright dignified posture.

Staying Present and Dealing with Difficult Thoughts and Emotions

Choose to sit either on a straight‐backed chair or on the floor, perhaps with a thick cushion under the hips, allowing the floor or the chair to provide the support so that the body is steady, the back erect, the head is balanced comfortably on the body, and allowing the body to settle into stillness. The Breath

Now, bringing attention to the fact that the body is breathing and ­becoming aware of the movement of the breath as it enters and leaves the body. Getting a sense of where the breath is most prominent, perhaps at the tip of the nose, the mouth, at the area of the chest, or abdomen. Notice if there is a tendency to control the breath in any way, and, if this is the case, endeavoring to let go of that in favour of letting the breath move freely. Bringing the attention back to the sensations of the breath and allowing the breath to be whatever way it wants to be, right now. The breath could be short, long, deep, shallow, rough, or smooth, it is fine just the way it is. Not looking to change it in any way, but just ­observing it, bringing awareness to each in‐breath and each out‐breath. Being aware of the physical sensations of breathing and notice where these sensations happen to be strongest. This could be at the nostrils, perhaps an awareness of cool air entering the body and slightly warmer air leaving the body. The breath could be most prominent at the mouth, or maybe an awareness of sensations created by the breath in the chest, or in the abdomen, or the belly? Getting up close to the breath and bringing a friendly curiosity to what is being observed, being with each breath from the beginning to the end. Allow awareness to drop into the flow of the breath, perhaps noticing an awareness of the spaces between breaths, or a sense of the intention to take the very next breath. Sooner or later the mind will wander away from the practice, perhaps drifting into thoughts about planning, worrying, remembering, or projecting into the future. Alternatively, distractions can arrive in the form of sounds or sensations in the body. When the attention is no longer focused on the breath, simply escort it back to the sensations of breathing. Remembering to be kind, but also firm, we could perhaps describe this attitude as gentle discipline. Throughout this practice awareness of the breath can be used as an anchor to refocus attention, to return the attention back to the present moment. It is important that when the mind wanders it is returned with a sense of acceptance, patience, and friendliness. There is no need to judge, or be critical, after all it is not a mistake, it is just what minds tend to do.

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The Body

As attention is paid to breathing, other sensations may arise and be noticed in the body. This could be a sense of stillness or ease, discomfort or agitation. As attention is maintained on the breath, choose now to expand awareness to also include a sense of the body as a whole, and become aware of any sensations throughout the body. There may be experiences relating to sensations of touch, contact with the chair or the floor, or sensations from sitting in the feet and legs. Bringing an attitude of curiosity to this process, perhaps noticing c­ lothing upon skin or the air on the parts of the body that are uncovered. Expand awareness once more to not only include the flow of the breath, but also a sense of the body. It is helpful that when sensations arise in the body that judging or reacting to whatever is arising in the moment is counterbalanced with acceptance, trying to accept it as part of the experience, because it is already here. There may be times, and this can happen to anyone, that sensations in the body become so intense that they feel overwhelming and dominate the field of awareness. When this happens, it can be very difficult to remain focused and hold concentration. There are several choices that can be made in response to this kind of experience during the practice. Shifting to a more comfortable position is an option. If this is the choice, perhaps see if the intention to move can be noticed, as well as any sensations that are created when moving the body. Another way to work with intensity is to stay with it, to not move. Instead, attention is focused on the sensation, so actually moving towards the part of the body that is creating the intense sensations. Having done this, then choosing to breathe into the sensation, and breathe out from it, opening and softening, rather than resisting. If this is difficult, then notice any reactions that are arising, being kind and compassionate in this approach, and allow them to be with all the sensations. When the intensity subsides, or the time seems right to do so, expanding awareness again to the body and back to the anchor that is the breath. Sounds

Now, electing to expand the field of awareness once more, this time focusing attention on hearing, an awareness of sounds. Being attentive to sounds that may be arising within the body, from inside the room or from outside. Notice any sounds that appear to be near, distant, constant, or coming and going. Not straining or searching for sounds, but just letting them arise and pass. There may be an awareness of judging sounds, of liking or disliking, or noticing that some disturb the ability to focus by stimulating thoughts or physical sensations, and yet others seem to come and go without rippling the waters of the mind.

Staying Present and Dealing with Difficult Thoughts and Emotions

Although this can be difficult at first, setting an intention not to label the sounds that are arising, but rather noticing the tone and texture, the quality of the sound, bringing beginner’s mind to listening. Perhaps becoming aware of the spaces between sounds, how they emerge as they enter the silence. Always remember that when the mind drifts into thinking, bringing it back to hearing with gentleness and allowing the arising of sound to return the attention back to the present moment. Thinking

This time, expand awareness to include thinking, and attending to thoughts as they move through the mind. Let the breath, body, and sound all drift into the background, and allow the thinking process to come to centre stage for a while. Within this section of the practice, rather than following each individual thought, or getting involved in the content of each thought, simply see each thought as it comes into the mind as just that, a thought, viewing this progression as the arising and evaporating of mental events. The thoughts that are observed as they arise and pass through the mind could be about anything, they could present as thoughts about the future, or the past, about time passing, feelings, or images. The intention is to be present with whatever is arising, and to notice thoughts as they linger and dissolve. There will be times when awareness vanishes and instead the attention is drawn into the stream of thinking, becoming lost, inattentive to the moment, and taken away by the train of thought. When this happens, use the breath to bring attention back to the present and then once more come back to the observation of thoughts. Remember that if thoughts arise that are difficult to stay with, then returning to the breath can be the safe haven, the anchor to the present moment. Emotions

It may be that while attending to thoughts it becomes apparent that some appear to be connected to emotions, and the impact from this can be felt not only in the body, but also in the mind. Again, as suggested with arising thoughts, emotions can also arise randomly, unplanned, and unintentionally. This could include pleasant emotions, such as contentment or happiness, or it could be an unpleasant emotion, such as boredom, anger, fear, or sadness. The intention here is to allow awareness to include each emotion as it arises, perhaps including any sensations that seem to be connected to a particular emotion. If possible, bringing a sense of curiosity to this exploration, being interested in what those sensations actually are. If an emotion arises that is difficult and challenging to stay with, then remember the wise choices that are available, including returning to the breath as an anchor, moving up closer, or leaving the emotions just as they are.

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Choiceless Awareness

For the remaining period of time letting go of all objects of attention, the breath, sensations in the body, sounds, thoughts, and emotions. Now, shifting awareness to simply sitting here, fully aware and present in each moment. If thoughts arise, then observing thoughts; if sounds arise, then opening awareness to sounds; if it is the breath that is most prominent, then paying careful attention to the breath. Sitting in silence and stillness from moment to moment, just being with arising experiences as they unfold. A recording of the sitting meditation can be downloaded from: http://www.livingmindfully.co.uk Comments from Participants

Nikki: The sitting meditation seemed to really strike a chord with me; it was in this practice that I discovered just how much of my stress was self‐inflicted. I never realized how negative and self‐critical my thinking had become, and how much that impacted on me emotionally. I found this practice challenging, I would often get upset, but eventually it got a little easier to watch thoughts and emotions come and go. It’s very much work in progress, but the occasions when practice is calm and peaceful keeps me practising. Anne: To say that the sitting meditation is my preferred practice would be far from the truth. Firstly, physical sensations, I get hot, itchy, and fidgety, sometimes I just want to get up and leave the room. Then, sounds, everything can annoy me, the clock ticking, a door closing, the wind blowing. When I first started, I couldn’t find a comfortable position, and then to add to everything I listened to participants share how peaceful it had all been, I wish! I have realized over time that the world will not stop so I can do my practice in total silence, I have let go a little of wanting things to be a certain way, it is this that creates calmness. Margaret: I use the sitting meditation often during my day; I love that sense of just stopping, I like to be busy and find it hard to slow down, even when tired. However, I now have chronic fatigue syndrome (CFS) and just can’t do everything I used to, even though my mind tells me I can. Before I did the mindfulness programme both my doctor and the staff at the CFS clinic kept telling me I needed to learn to pace myself, take breaks, rest, listen to my body. I finally learned to do that through mindfulness, sometimes I practice for 30 minutes; other times its short practices, perhaps paying attention to physical sensations, or sitting outside being mindful of sounds.

Staying Present and Dealing with Difficult Thoughts and Emotions

Anthony: In my job I drive most days and usually long distances, my workload is usually very demanding, so it’s no surprise that this is the source of my anxiety and low mood. Actually getting to the programme each week was a challenge, and I have to admit my home practice was patchy at best. In the first sitting meditation of the programme I suddenly became aware of just how stressed I had become; I was on autopilot, ignoring the signs, and in danger of becoming unwell. From that moment I gave the mindfulness programme my full attention; the little moments of relative peace that arrived unexpectedly spurred me on. David: I work for the emergency services, it’s a stressful job, and I have been off work several times with anxiety and depressive episodes. Out of all the practices, it is the sitting meditation I find most useful. The thing I struggle with most is switching off from the day’s events, my mind can go over experiences constantly, and I find this exhausting. I have a set routine now with practice; this includes sitting meditation when I get home from work, before I do anything else. I have learned to sit with the difficulties of the day, sometimes I use the guided recording, other times I just sit with my body and breath, and often within the chaos I find periods of stillness. Annabel: Over a year ago I was involved in a road traffic accident, although it was not a serious incident it left me with a fear of driving and panic attacks every time I got in a car. My diagnosis was anxiety rather than post‐traumatic stress, and when I chose to do the mindfulness programme it was at a venue I could walk to. I have to say that the programme was a difficult journey, more than once I wanted to give up. It was the sitting meditation that proved the most challenging, especially observing thoughts and emotions, yet it is this practice that has highlighted my aversion and fears and has taught me that most of my anxiety is driven either by past events or worries about the future.

­The Breathing Space Allison: I have found the breathing space meditation invaluable. I use it everyday, and find it is a great way to ground myself when I notice I am becoming stressed or anxious. It is a wonderful way to just calm down and remind myself to breath and let things go. The above comment is typical of those found on feedback forms from participants at the end of a programme. This short but effective practice is ideal for bringing mindfulness into daily life. Initially, it is introduced as a regular feature in one’s day, an opportunity to stop for a few minutes

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and pause, to check in, and to reconnect with the body and breath. However, it seamlessly transforms into a practice to assist with difficulty, with participants dropping in to a breathing space as a natural response to stressful situations. The sequence in this practice could be described as an hourglass shape, beginning with a wide perspective and checking in, ‘what is going on right now?’, becoming aware of any physical sensations, thoughts, and emotions that are arising. The attention is then narrowed as the focus shifts to the breath, before expanding awareness once more to encompass the breath, and the body as a whole.

­Transcript: Breathing Space Guidance for the Three‐step Breathing Space Step 1: Acknowledging

Move into the present moment by deliberately adopting a dignified posture, making sure the feet are placed firmly on the floor and that the back is straight but not rigid. Allow the hands to rest where comfortable, having the head balanced on the body. Then checking in: ‘what is going on right now, in this moment?’ Notice and acknowledge any experiences that are arising, allowing this to be an option, an alternative to perhaps turning away from the experience. Choosing acceptance as a response to any physical sensations, thoughts, emotions, and feelings that are entering awareness, and perhaps staying with them for a few moments. If it seems right to do so, include any negative feelings or experiences that are arising. Step 2: Gathering

Now, shifting the focus of attention, and gently resting it upon the breath. It is helpful to place the attention where there is a sense of the breath entering and leaving the body. This could be at the belly, the chest, mouth, or the tip of the nose. Experience fully each in‐breath and each out‐breath as they follow one after the other. Paying attention in this way can allow the breath to function as an anchor and can promote re‐engaging with the present moment, which may in turn help to access a state of awareness and stillness. Step 3: Expanding awareness

Now, expanding awareness around the breath to encompass the whole body, including the space it takes up, as if the whole body were breathing. Having a sense of that space and of holding everything in awareness. The sequence used in the breathing space begins with a wide focus – ‘what is going on right now, in this moment’ – and is then followed by a narrow focus – focusing on the breath – and is then expanded

Staying Present and Dealing with Difficult Thoughts and Emotions

into a wider focus – awareness of the breath and the body. Each section is approximately one minute. A recording of the breathing space can be downloaded from: http:// www.livingmindfully.co.uk. The following is often read to participants in session 3: I walk down the street. There is a deep hole in the sidewalk. I fall in. I am lost … I am hopeless. It isn’t my fault It takes forever to find a way out. I walk down the same street. There is a deep hole in the sidewalk. I pretend I don’t see it. I fall in again. I can’t believe I’m in the same place. But it isn’t my fault. It still takes a long time to get out. I walk down the same street. There is a deep hole in the sidewalk. I see it is there. I still fall in … it’s a habit. My eyes are open. It is my fault. I get out immediately. I walk down the same street. There is a deep hole in the sidewalk. I walk around it. I walk down another street. (‘Autobiography in Five Short Chapters’, Portia Nelson, 2010)

­Week 3: Home Practice 1)  Sitting meditation: practice the sitting meditation every day. 2)  Three‐step breathing space: regular – practice three times a day at times that have been decided in advance. It can be helpful to attach this to a regular activity, such as before meals or set an alarm on a phone as a reminder. 3)  Mindfulness of automatic pilot: notice what pulls the attention away from the present moment, and what arises that creates aversion?

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­Summary It could be argued that we spend most of our days either trying to hold on to experiences or pushing them away. In other words, we attach to pleasant experiences and do our best to avoid unpleasant experiences. As experiences arise and pass both these reactions can lead to suffering. If through the practice of sitting meditation we can learn to take a wider perspective in relation to thoughts, emotions, and feelings, the opportunity then arises to hold them in awareness. This will allow alternative ways of dealing with difficulties that arise, a more responsive approach, and the creation of choices that are made from insight and wisdom. To assist with the rigours and challenges of daily life the introduction of a breathing space can be of benefit. This short but powerful practice can create a space to rest in stillness throughout the day, as well as helping to respond in times of difficulty.

­References Chödrön, P. (2004). The wisdom of no escape: How to love yourself and your world. London: Element. Nelson, P. (2012). There’s a hole in my sidewalk: The romance of self‐discovery. Hillsboro, OR: Beyond Words Publishing.

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Catriona I started the programme with an open mind, but also with an uncertainty around what impact it would really have on my life. I was, however, determined to give it my best shot, and so attended every session and practised the meditations most days. I had recently completed an intensive period of psychotherapy and had made progress, however, the final piece of the jigsaw of my recovery was the mindfulness programme. I now use the sitting meditation and breathing spaces daily; if I’m busy and stressed at work I incorporate them into my day. At home, I give myself the time to do the practice, even if I’m not stressed at that moment in time I still feel the benefit afterwards, and love the feeling of calm and peace it gives me. I find it difficult to really explain how the programme has helped my life and continues to do so, it’s a feeling more than something I can put into words. Recently, I have finally been able free myself from antidepressants, there is no more motivating reason to practice than this.

Living Mindfully: Discovering Authenticity through Mindfulness Coaching, First Edition. Gary Heads. © 2017 John Wiley & Sons, Ltd. Published 2017 by John Wiley & Sons, Ltd.

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8 ­Accepting and Letting Be ­Week 4 Rationale

If the ability to relate differently to arising experiences is cultivated, then the possibility of allowing things just to be as they are, without the need to judge or change them, can open up. Acceptance plays a pivotal role in this process by helping to promote self care, and enabling the capability to see clearly what, if anything, needs to change. If an attitude of kindness and compassion can also be brought to practice then this may further enhance the possibility of change. By learning to observe and therefore understand the negative moods and thoughts that can be restrictive when relating to experiences, so the possibility of new choices can evolve. These alternative choices can potentially have a transformational effect upon the relationship to experience. Through the gentle exploration of  thoughts the patterns of thinking may reveal themselves, thereby p­resenting the option to engage with them or not. Themes

The key learning points that thread their way through this session are centred upon developing an awareness of habitual patterns when relating to experiences. Encouraging participants to notice when an unwillingness to engage with difficult experiences (aversion), or clinging to e­xperiences (attachment), or ignoring experiences (indifference) arises. It cultivates the wisdom to see the difference between reacting and responding to experiences, especially those experiences that are s­tressful. If by honouring whatever is being experienced, and seeing those experiences as a way to learn and grow, a different relationship to thoughts can be established, this will lead to a healthier and more c­onstructive way of coping and transforming experiences. Living Mindfully: Discovering Authenticity through Mindfulness Coaching, First Edition. Gary Heads. © 2017 John Wiley & Sons, Ltd. Published 2017 by John Wiley & Sons, Ltd.

Accepting and Letting Be

Softness means opening to whatever is there, relaxing into it. At such a time, try this ‘mantra’. ‘It’s okay. Whatever it is, it’s okay. Let me feel it.’ That is the softening of the mind. You can open to your experience with a sense of allowing, and simply be with w­hatever predominates: a pain, a thought, an emotion, anything. Softening the mind is not so hard to do; it is largely a matter of remembering to do it. ‘It’s okay, just let me feel this.’ Then things settle down by themselves in a natural way. Struggle comes from not accepting what is present. (Goldstein, 2012) From the beginning of the programme the intention has always been the development of awareness, learning to notice whatever is arising moment to moment as experiences unfold. Working in this way the recognition of patterns of thought, feelings, and physical sensations can become clear. One of the benefits of mindfulness is that it has the potential to enable an awareness of the habits that prevail in day‐to‐day life. This new‐found awareness may sanction the viewing of behaviour and reactions that dominate experiences with clarity and a more reasoned approach. This can lead to the development of a capacity to notice if the mind is repeatedly being drawn to a particular place, whether that happens to be a thought, feeling, emotion, pain, or intensity. The possibility then presents itself of deliberately and intentionally turning towards that  place, holding the experience in awareness, with gentleness and kindness. This is the first step, to examine with curiosity whatever has arisen in each moment. Having done this, the invitation is to then notice what is arising, and what the relationship is to the experience, how often are snap judgements made when relating to experiences? In fact, it could be argued that large parts of the day are spent making decisions around l­iking or disliking. This can create distress, or cause one to become frightened, angry, or irritated, leading to the generation of a desire to eradicate the experience if it is seen as unpleasant, uncomfortable, or painful. Equally, if the experience is deemed to be pleasurable, comfortable, or creates a sense of having achieved something, then attachment can be brought to the experience, not wanting to let go of it, wanting more, or trying to hold on to the moment. This judgemental thinking, liking, and disliking will play out in mindfulness practice just as it does in daily life. For instance, if during a sitting meditation a pleasant sensation were to arise, perhaps a warm tingly feeling that is regarded as pleasant, the moment the sensation is tuned into is the moment that it begins to evaporate. Instantly, it could be replaced by regret, or irritation, both of which have arisen due to a sense of loss. The physical sensation was

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simply passing through awareness; however, the reaction produces attachment and then craving, which turns the experience into a source of suffering. This continuous judging of experiences is the opposite of acceptance. The solution is to stop trying to make things different from how they are in any given moment. This may sound simple in principle, but is far from easy to incorporate; however, it is acceptance that provides the springboard. Accepting experience means choosing to allow space for whatever is arising in the moment, and being with that experience without the need to create some other state. Through acceptance can come a settling into awareness and an exploration of experiences that are happening internally and externally. If some experiences demand attention, then the choice is available to let them be. It is important not to see acceptance as some kind of resignation or a signal to just give up. The opposite is in  fact true; bringing acceptance to experience is a positive act that enhances the possibility of becoming fully aware of any difficulties that may be arising. The act of acceptance creates the wisdom to respond in a more skilful way, and encourages the letting go of old habitual and reactive strategies. Mindfulness of Thoughts

Awareness is not the same as thought. It lies beyond thinking, although it makes use of thinking, honoring its value and power. Awareness is more like a vessel which can hold and contain thinking, helping us to see and know our thoughts as thoughts, rather than getting caught up in them as reality. (Kabat‐Zinn, 2004) The stream of thoughts arriving and then dispersing in the mind are sometimes likened to a waterfall, a constant flow that is often triggered automatically. This can have a very influential effect upon feelings, e­motions, and what is initiated in the way of a response. The practice of bringing awareness repeatedly to thoughts and images that are arising and passing through the mind, learning to let them go, and returning the attention to the breath can enable the creation of a sense of spaciousness. This may help to get some distance and perspective on whatever happens to be arising, it is an approach that can demonstrate that there are alternative ways to think about situations other than the old habitual thought‐ patterns that automatically arise in the mind. Perhaps most importantly, it may result in establishing the realization that thoughts are simply r­andom mental events, that they are not necessarily facts, and that we are not our thoughts.

Accepting and Letting Be

The understanding or knowing that comes from viewing thoughts as mental events rather than facts, and de‐personalizing the content, could be referred to as cultivating the wise mind. Observing thoughts and images that occur from one moment to the next can often provide an indication of what is going on deeper in the mind. It produces choices: you can choose to let them go, allow them to be there, or explore them from different perspectives. Applying curiosity and beginner’s mind to this exploration can allow one to become more familiar with habitual, automatic, and unhelpful patterns of thinking. By cultivating a mindful approach to thoughts, an understanding of the process that instigates unhelpful mood spirals, reactions, and behaviours may begin to emerge. The establishment of a wiser relationship with thoughts can reveal the opportunity to choose an alternative and more responsive course of action. What to Do with Thoughts

Through the cultivation of acceptance and letting be in both formal and informal practice the possibility of just watching thoughts arrive and leave becomes an option. The need to follow or become caught up in thoughts can be avoided with wise discernment gained by observation and curiosity in practice. For some people, the use of imagery can be helpful in acquiring some distance when paying attention to thoughts. Picturing thoughts as clouds moving across the sky or as leaves floating down a stream can be a productive option for certain individuals. Using visualization is not, however, suitable for all, and in guiding any practice it is always prudent to incorporate all aspects of the representational s­ystem, visual, auditory, and kinaesthetic (Slater & Usoh, 1993). When negative thoughts and images arise in the mind we can experiment with holding them in awareness, remembering wherever possible to bring an attitude of gentle interest and curiosity to the process. It might be beneficial to expand awareness to let in some of the following possibilities: Perhaps I don’t know all the facts. Perhaps I am confusing a thought with a fact. Perhaps I am jumping to conclusions. Perhaps I am condemning myself totally because of one small thing. Perhaps I am concentrating on my weaknesses and forgetting my strengths. Perhaps I am blaming myself for something that is out of my control. Perhaps I am judging myself too harshly. Perhaps I am setting myself up to fail by setting unreasonably high standards. Perhaps I am trying to mind‐read or predict the future.

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Perhaps I am expecting perfection. Perhaps I am overestimating the likelihood of disaster. For particularly difficult thoughts, it may be helpful to purposefully take another look at them. This can be done in sitting meditation, letting the ‘wise mind’ give its perspective in an open and balanced way (Hawton, Salkovskis, Kirk, & Clark, 1989).

­Breathing Space: Coping with Difficulties Jan: The breathing space is my time to pause and let things be just as they are, it has prevented many an overreaction. Guidance for the Three‐step Breathing Space: Coping

The breathing space can be an effective practice when faced with c­hallenging and difficult situations. Although the coping version of this practice is introduced in Week 4 many participants may have already dropped into a breathing space when caught up in stressful situations. One such participant on the Living Mindfully Programme described this practice as being like a ship out on the ocean, as in life things will run smoothly for a while but inevitably stormy waters will arrive. There will be times when the need arises to acknowledge that there is a difficulty, to drop anchor, the anchor being the breath, and wait patiently, riding out the storm before continuing the journey. It is a lovely image of what is an effective and accessible practice. Step 1: Becoming aware of the difficulty

The first step is to actually acknowledge that there is a difficulty. Then, beginning by moving to a dignified posture, ask the question: ‘what is going on right now in this moment?’, noticing, acknowledging, and i­dentifying what is happening right now. If it is helpful, the experience could be put into words in the mind, labelling what is there: anger, tight chest, self‐critical thoughts. Become aware of any thoughts, feelings, emotions, or physical sensations that are arising in each moment. Step 2: Moving attention to the breath

Now, gathering the experience, and gently shifting focus so that the full attention is on the breath. Dropping into the flow of the breath, being with each in‐breath and each out‐breath. It can be helpful to sometimes use the mantra of ‘in‐breath, out‐breath’ or to count breaths to help maintain focus, however, these are only suggestions and it may be that just an

Accepting and Letting Be

awareness of each breath is sufficient. If the mind drifts, then allow the breath to be the anchor that tethers the attention to the present moment. Step 3: Expanding awareness to the whole body

Now, once more expanding attention, this time towards the whole body as if the whole body were breathing. Guide the breath throughout the body, especially to those areas that are showing signs of discomfort, and take the breath into any sensations that are arising here. As the breath is released on the out‐breath, allow a sense of softness, opening, and letting go to emerge, perhaps repeating the phrase, ‘it’s okay to feel whatever I’m feeling’. Then, widening the attention further to include a sense of the space around the body, holding everything in awareness. As the practice comes to an end and the next moments of life unfold, consciously choose to take this expanded awareness into the day. The following is often read to participants in session 4: This being human is a guest house. Every morning a new arrival. A joy, a depression, a meanness, some momentary awareness comes as an unexpected visitor. Welcome and entertain them all! Even if there’re a crowd of sorrows, who violently sweep your house empty of its furniture, still, treat each guest honourably. He may be clearing you out for some new delight. The dark thought, the shame, the malice, meet them at the door laughing, and invite them in. Be grateful for whoever comes, because each has been sent as a guide from beyond. (‘The Guest House’, Rumi, 1994)

­Week 4: Home Practice 1)  Work with core meditations: body scan, movement, walking, or sitting for 30 minutes practice every day. Perhaps experiment with and without the recordings. Practice whatever meditation seems appropriate for each day. 2)  Three‐step breathing space: regular – practice three times a day at times that have been decided in advance. It can be helpful to attach this to a regular activity, such as before meals, or set an alarm on a phone as a reminder.

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3)  Three‐step breathing space: coping – introduce this practice ­whenever there is an awareness of becoming stressed or anxious, and explore options of responding with greater mindfulness. 4)  Awareness of reactions: bring awareness to moments when reactions occur and explore possible options for responding with mindfulness and creativity. Practice this in meditation as well as in day‐to‐day activities.

­Summary In this session the emphasis is primarily focused upon relating to arising experiences with acceptance, kindness, and compassion. These attitudes are key components in maintaining well‐being and learning to make responsive choices. We can learn through becoming familiar with negative moods and thoughts to relate differently to our experiences, to let go of judging, and to allow things to be as they are. This understanding of habitual patterns of thinking can transform our relationship to experiences. New choices may arise, including the option to engage or not. The introduction of the breathing space as a coping practice when dealing with stressful situations can have a profound effect upon a p­articipants’ ability to manage difficulties. When viewing feedback forms from completed programmes it is evident how often individuals turn to this practice, and how effective it can be.

­References Goldstein, J. (2012). Insight meditation: The practice of freedom. Boulder, CO: Shambhala Publications. Hawton, K., Salkovskis, P. M., Kirk, & Clark, D. M. (Eds.) (1989). Cognitive behavioural therapy for psychiatric problems: A practical guide. Oxford: Oxford University Press. Jelaluddin Rumi. (1995). The essential Rumi, trans. Coleman Barks. New York: HarperCollins. Kabat‐Zinn, J. (2004). Wherever you go, there you are: Mindfulness meditation for everyday life. London: Piatkus. Slater, M., & Usoh, M. (1993). Representations systems, perceptual position, and presence in immersive virtual environments. Presence: Teleoperators and Virtual Environments, 2(3), 221–233.

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Amanda I am finding that I am becoming more and more mindful in my day‐to‐ day activities, and it is helping me immensely. I am still finding the time to do formal meditation challenging, but find it easier to fall into the more I practice. I intend to make more time for practice as my anxiety has greatly reduced since attending the programme, in fact I may be able to stop my anxiety medication altogether. I have found this whole journey enlightening. It all makes so much sense to me that I can hardly believe I’ve wasted so much time being stressed and anxious in my life. My ability to remain calmer has really impacted on my home life; I am more likely to take a step back from situations than get agitated. This has helped my husband, who seems to be dealing much better with his work stresses, and my three‐year‐old daughter, who seems to be more tuned in to other people’s feelings and can be a lot calmer than she was. It may just be part of her growing up, but I’d like to think she’s picking up on the mindful vibes at an early age, and might be less anxious than I have been in my life.

Living Mindfully: Discovering Authenticity through Mindfulness Coaching, First Edition. Gary Heads. © 2017 John Wiley & Sons, Ltd. Published 2017 by John Wiley & Sons, Ltd.

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9 ­ ringing it Together, Looking after Yourself, B and Moving Forward ­Week 5 Rationale

As the programme enters its final week the recognition of just how important activity, environment, and mood are to general well‐being becomes apparent. This realization emerges through noticing and understanding that what is seen, the action taken, and what is taken in on a daily basis influences the capacity to stay well. The first step on deciding to take wiser action can be enhanced by using the breath to create space, an anchor to the present moment. Establishing a regular mindfulness practice can support the journey through life; if an intention is set to continue to work with the practices, then this will promote positive r­easons to take care of both body and mind. Themes

As the programme has unfolded patterns may have begun to emerge that perhaps touch areas of vulnerability. Importantly, there may also be the recognition of strengths, abilities, and inner resources. By paying attention to what is taken in during daily life, that awareness can open up the opportunity to make wiser choices. Practising is not necessarily difficult; however, remembering to practice can be a challenge. It is essential that the momentum gained through regular practice during the programme is maintained after the programme ends; equally, it is important to realize that although this is the end of the programme, the journey is only beginning. Daily Life

How time is spent from moment to moment, day by day, year on year, can affect general well‐being and influence the ability to respond skilfully to whatever is happening in daily life. Surely, if this is the case, then great Living Mindfully: Discovering Authenticity through Mindfulness Coaching, First Edition. Gary Heads. © 2017 John Wiley & Sons, Ltd. Published 2017 by John Wiley & Sons, Ltd.

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care should be taken when choosing how to spend the precious time that is allocated each day. It is an interesting process to examine the activities that lie within an average day. In some cases, many, if not all, could be described as mundane and repetitive, yet they do not have to be boring or uninteresting, the key may well be in how these activities are approached. For instance, one could be washing the dishes, but have very little awareness of the task in hand. If the mind decides that this task is not worthy of attention it can easily drift of to find something deemed more interesting. Suddenly resentment arrives, and there is a resistance to having to wash them, or alternatively something might be happening in our life right now that is troubling, and the mind could so easily wander away into rumination, worry, and anxiety. A useful question to ask when this happens is: ‘how do I know I am washing the dishes?’ Asking this question can re‐focus attention back into the present moment, it fires up curiosity, and so interest is rekindled in what is happening right now. I know I am washing the dishes because: I can feel the hot water, all the different shapes, and the bubbles in the water, the smells, colours, or the water dripping. It is remarkable what can be discovered if awareness is present, if the effort is made to be mindful, the skill of noticing can be transformational. Exercise 1: Nurturing or Depleting

The following exercise is a helpful guide in exploring how time is spent, and how the activities chosen are being perceived, noticing the relationship to the task, and getting a sense of the thoughts, feelings, and emotions that arise when completing the activity. Begin by making a list of tasks completed in an average day, including personal tasks like getting washed, getting dressed, tasks done at work, emails, filing, looking after the home, housework. There may be tasks that are completed for the benefit of others, including cooking, shopping, or collecting children from school. Things engaged with that have a recreational perspective, maybe watching TV, or going to the gym, or sitting down with a book. Write down at least 20 tasks so that there is a good reflection of an average day. Next, moving down the list decide if each one is a task that is either uplifting (nurturing), or deflating, depressing, or lowers mood (depleting). It may be that some tasks appear to be both nurturing and depleting; this is understandable, as mood plays a significant role in determining how tasks are viewed on any given day. Another influential factor that should be taken into consideration when exploring routine activities is current life events, what is going on in life, whether it is regarded as positive or negative, will certainly impact upon how an activity is approached.

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When the list is complete continue by addressing the following questions: Of the things I do as part of my day, what nourishes me; what gives me a sense of vitality; what brings me into the present moment or gives me a sense of pleasure? Of the things that I do, what drains me; what decreases my sense of a­ctually being alive and present; what makes me feel that I merely exist or worse? Before looking at how time is spent on an average day there must first be an acknowledgement and acceptance that certain elements of life are simply beyond any kind of control. Although it may be beyond our power to change particular events and circumstances, how they are approached is within our control, as are the responses initiated. Bringing mindfulness to a task may not mean that its suddenly transformed into a wonderful and nourishing activity, but paying careful attention may just cut through the mental chatter and resistance and result in it being a neutral experience. Certainly, slowing the task down and completing it mindfully can change the overall experience. In terms of the items on the list, can there be a conscious decision to choose to increase the time spent on nurturing activities and decrease the time spent on depleting activities wherever possible?

­ xtending the Breathing Space by Adding E an ‘Action Step’ It may be that in some difficult and challenging situations it feels appropriate to build on the awareness created through introducing a breathing space, and extend the practice into the next actively thereby instigating an ‘action step’. Option 1: Do Something that is Enjoyable

This is making an effort to bring kindness and compassion to both mind and body by choosing an activity that is both pleasurable and nurturing. Below is a list of suggestions, however, it is important to select something personal and meaningful, and is an activity that feels authentic to the moment. Although this may feel a little awkward at first, with practice it will become a natural response to difficulty. Initially, the most challenging element of the practice can be cutting through resistance and actually giving yourself permission to instigate the action step: have a hot bath; take a nap;

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eat a favourite meal or make a hot drink, consuming it slowly and mindfully; go for a walk, if possible in nature, stop, and breathe in some fresh air; visit or phone a friend; spend time doing a hobby; do some gardening; watch something funny or uplifting on TV; listen to music. Option 2: Do Something that is Satisfying or Gives You a Sense of Achievement

Choosing to complete an activity that provided a result, a sense of achievement, of ‘having got something done’, can be uplifting and p­roduce a positive mind‐set. The following are suggestions: do some housework; clear out a cupboard or drawer; take something to the charity shop; pay a bill; do something that you have been avoiding; work in the garden. Option 3: Act Mindfully

There may be times when choices are limited, and this is especially relevant to the workplace. In these instances the focus of attention can be on whatever is being attended to right now, making the choice to act mindfully. This could be simply stretching to pick up a pen, filling the kettle, walking in the house or office. Noticing all the sensations that are being created by the current act, checking in with the breath, and the contact of the feet on the floor, being fully engaging with the here and now. The aim is to use awareness of what is unfolding in each moment to make the best choices, choices that are unique to each individual and to each moment. It is helpful to approach the breathing space and action step with an open mind, rather than deciding whether it will be useful or not. Perhaps seeing it as an experiment each time it is tried out. An option could be to vary the activities by referring to the nourishing and sense of achievement items from the list. When placed under pressure, the more likely it is that old habitual ways of thinking and behaving, including rumination, negative self‐talk, or worrying about the future, will rise to the surface. The more experiences that are held in awareness the greater chance there is of identifying and avoiding these unhelpful patterns, allowing choices and actions to be wiser and therefore more effective.

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Exercise 2: Looking at Stress Indicators

It is worthwhile spending time investigating and getting to know the warning signs that indicate the arrival of stress. Exploring where in the mind and body the impact of a stressful situation manifests itself can allow the development of awareness, and this can lead to skilful action being taken that may alleviate the symptoms. This action could be introducing a breathing space or simply choosing to do something that is helpful. It can be beneficial to make notes, to detail whatever has been discovered, and to approach the exercise with gentle interest. The following are examples of warning signs shared by participants on the Living Mindfully Programme: cramming too much in; headaches; irritability; going to bed later; not sleeping; procrastinating; concentration issues; physical sensations, including temperature change, shaking, nausea, and shortness of breath. Actions/Strategies

Now, explore what action is actually taken in moments of stress, being aware of what actions are actually helpful or potentially unhelpful in these situations. Reactions to stress can become habitual, and are often triggered automatically; simply note what has been noticed, remembering to bring acceptance and a non‐judgemental attitude to this process. Here are examples from participants covering both helpful and unhelpful categories: Unhelpful

eating too much or not eating; drinking more coffee or alcohol; taking more medication, including painkillers; unhelpful self‐talk or feelings of guilt; avoidance; working harder, staying late; watching mindless TV. Helpful

listening to music; walking or going for a run;

Bringing it Together, Looking after Yourself, and Moving Forward

participating in a hobby or reading a book; turning the TV off; talking to friends who are supportive; have a bath; practising yoga or doing any form of physical exercise. The fundamental requirement to responding wisely to stress is to have strategies in place that can be called upon when the warning signs appear. Plan ahead, have choices that can be commenced whether at home or at work, and be patient. There will be times when everything falls into place and times when well‐intentioned plans are lost in a sea of reactivity. Reflect and learn, it is all great practice. Acceptance and Letting Things Be

God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference. (Niebuhr, 1932) Acceptance is often the facilitator of skilful action that can achieve change in both the inner and outer worlds. However, as Reinhold Niebuhr’s quote suggests, there are some situations that are very difficult or actually impossible to change. In this situation, by continuing to struggle to solve a problem that cannot be resolved, or refusing to accept a situation that has arisen in life, the end result is often exhaustion from the constant effort. Continuing in this way can actually increase a sense of hopelessness, despair, and depression. On these occasions, a sense of dignity and control can still be retained if a conscious and mindful decision is made to let go of the struggle and accept the situation as it is. When doing this, it is important to bring an attitude of kindness and compassion to the situation, and to the process of accepting and letting go, including the observation of noticing any reactions to having made this choice. The grace, courage, and wisdom to make these choices can be found within, it is through an awareness of each moment that the key to unlocking this potential can be found. Weaving Mindfulness into Everyday Activities

It can be of great benefit to personal practice if mindfulness can be incorporated into day‐to‐day activities. I often share with participants my experience of bringing mindfulness to traffic lights. How often does annoyance and irritation arise when the red light presents itself? However, this is one of many instances when the choice can be made to respond in

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a more skilful and accepting way. The sequence of lights can be a w­onderful opportunity to bring the attention back to the breath, and therefore back to the present moment. It is a simple but very effective practice: when the red light appears just allow the eyes to focus on the traffic lights as attention is brought to the breath; stay with each breath until the lights change to green and it is time to continue the journey. Over time this short practice can shift what was once seen as an irritation to something nourishing, a gift to practice, a moment to reconnect with the breath. The red light is there whether liked or disliked, can it be a reminder rather than a hindrance. It is not uncommon in the early stages of establishing regular mindfulness practice to find that practice has been added to the ever expanding ‘to do’ list. Another task to complete in an already hectic and demanding day. Rather than thinking of mindfulness practice as something separate from daily activities, we can choose instead to weave mindfulness practice through those activities. The issue here is remembering to do just that. Bringing attention to the breath at traffic lights creates a good habit, it becomes automatic, and it triggers awareness, allowing the attention to drop into the moment. There are countless tasks throughout the day that can provide the prospect of developing present moment attention. Most will be repetitive, and therefore subject to the mind wandering through lack of interest and familiarity. This repetitiveness is a guide to sustaining practice, to creating good habits and so strengthening awareness. By consciously choosing to integrate elements of the day into informal ­practice so the muscle of awareness will grow stronger. It can be helpful to decide in advance which tasks will be the focus of attention. Bringing mindfulness to routine activities was part of home practice in sessions 1 and 2 of the programme, when at this stage it was suggested that only one activity should be chosen and practised daily. It might be beneficial to start in a similar fashion before expanding the practice to further tasks. Here is a list of short practices that can be incorporated throughout the day. Arising in the morning and going to bed in the evening

When waking up in the morning, rather than jumping out of bed, take a moment to tune in to the sensations of the breath. Perhaps observe three mindful breaths before starting the day. This can be repeated before going to sleep at night. Bringing awareness to the body and mind when changing posture

Be aware of the body and mind when changing posture, noticing sensations when moving from lying to sitting, to standing, and to walking. Bring awareness to whenever a transition is made from one posture to the next.

Bringing it Together, Looking after Yourself, and Moving Forward

Using sounds as a reminder to drop into the present moment

Pay attention to sound, being present, and really listening, is something that can form an important part of daily practice. To begin with perhaps select one sound to work with that arrives regularly on an average day. This could be a phone ringing or the sound of birdsong, it could be a door closing or the sound of the wind. Every time the sound is heard it will be a reminder to be present, to pay attention. Working with appreciation, gratitude, and mindfulness, an exploratory practice around food

Whenever it is time to stop and eat or drink, the prospect of engaging with this practice arises. Begin by giving yourself permission to just take a minute and reconnect with the breath, then, with an attitude of beginner’s mind and curiosity, looking at the food as if for the very first time. Perhaps being grateful and appreciating the wonderful contribution made by nature in the form of sunlight, rain, and the earth. Appreciating the efforts of the farmer and the endeavours of everyone involved in the process of bringing the food to the table. Then, choosing to honour and be thankful for every involvement by paying careful attention as the food is eaten, bringing awareness to seeing, smelling, tasting, chewing, and swallowing the food. Listening and talking

There is a quote from the Dalai Lama that sums up this practice nicely: ‘When you talk you are just saying what you already know, if you listen you might hear something new.’ The reactive and automatic nature of speech can sometimes leave very little time for awareness to emerge, however, with a little effort conversations can be explored and a more reflective and authentic approach developed when interacting with others. A good place to start is listening: can an individual be listened to without the need to agree or disagree, like or dislike, or plan what is going to be said when the time comes to speak? Remember to be kind and compassionate when practising in this way. It will take time to develop this new skill, it may be at first that interactions are simply reflected upon afterwards, looking at what has been said and examining what alternatives were available. When it comes to speaking, can it just be what needs to be said, without overstating or understating? Practising patience

There are times in life when the world comes to a halt, and the only option available is to stop and wait. This could be standing in a queue, or stuck in endless traffic, or sitting in a waiting room. Because things have not turned out the way they were planned, it is more than likely that impatience will arrive, alongside any one of its cohorts of tension,

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irritability, frustration, or anger, to name a few. This time can be an opportunity to really notice the thoughts, emotions, and feelings that are arising in the guise of impatience. Bring awareness to standing, or sitting, and the breath. Feel the contact with the floor or chair, and rest the attention gently on each breath. Tune into how the mind and body are in this moment, and perhaps witness the arising and passing of impatience? Exploring nature with beginner’s mind

Connecting with nature whether out walking, or viewing the landscape from a vantage point outside, or inside through a window, can be an uplifting, settling, and grounding experience. The accessibility of this opportunity makes it an ideal addition to mindfulness practice both at home and, if possible, in the workplace. An option at work is to introduce a simple seeing meditation into the day. We can do this by taking the time to sit facing a window if possible, or sitting outside, and bringing awareness to seeing. Notice whatever arises moment by moment. It is helpful to begin by closing the eyes and tuning into the breath. Perhaps setting an intention to explore the content of the landscape with fresh eyes, beginner’s mind, and viewing whatever is seen as if for the very first time. Then, opening the eyes, and focusing attention on seeing, choosing to either explore the whole view or pay particular attention to one specific object, such as a tree, flower, or a cloud in the sky. Although this may be difficult at first, endeavouring to let go of any concept in the mind of what is being paid attention too. Can attention be focused on a tree, for instance, without the mind labelling it as a tree? Can it be viewed as just the object of attention? Just seeing, noticing, and exploring. There will be times when the mind drifts into thinking, analysing, remembering, or projecting into the future. Just as with previous mindfulness practices, the emphasis is on bringing it back without judging, and with kindness, back to simply seeing. When the available time has elapsed, allowing the eyes to close and observing the breath once more before ending the practice. If at home or at work there is no access to a window, then the seeing meditation can still be practised by bringing nature inside, having f­lowers in the home or a flower on a desk at work. Alternatively, items collected while walking, such as pebbles, leaves, or acorns, all can be used as objects for practice. The following is often read to participants in session 5: One day you finally knew what you had to do, and began, though the voices around you kept shouting their bad advice –

Bringing it Together, Looking after Yourself, and Moving Forward

though the whole house began to tremble and you felt the old tug at your ankles. ‘Mend my life!’ each voice cried. But you didn’t stop. You knew what you had to do, though the wind pried with its stiff fingers at the very foundations though their melancholy was terrible. It was already late enough, and a wild night, and the road full of fallen branches and stones. But little by little, as you left their voices behind, the stars began to burn through the sheets of clouds, and there was a new voice which you slowly recognized as your own, that kept you company as you stride deeper and deeper into the world, determined to do the only thing you could do – determined to save the only life you could save. (‘The Journey’, Mary Oliver)

­The Future For some participants the end of a programme can be a difficult process. There is often an air of sadness in the room, and the last session can be quiet and less interactive. Many individuals share their trepidation at l­osing the support of the group, and the fear of not being able to sustain mindfulness practice after the programme ends. However, not all p­rogrammes end in this way; some simply end with a thank you, whilst some almost resemble the last day of term at school, playful, and joyful. What is important when concluding a programme is that participants

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have information regarding ongoing support, and an idea of what their regular pattern of practice will be over the next few weeks. The significance of daily practice cannot be overemphasized; it is the consistent, regular practice that provides the solid foundations that lead to wise choices and responses in times of difficulty, stress, or unhappiness. Many individuals find establishing practice challenging, sometimes reverting to practice only when difficulties arise. This can be problematic, and even counterproductive, as concentration may be affected and motivation levels low. To assist in this crucial period attendance at refresher days and practice evenings are recommended. Participants are also reminded to use pauses, and breathing spaces, and that regular practice provides a way of ‘checking in with yourself’, so that it becomes the first response in times of difficulty.

­Evaluation of the Living Mindfully Programme At the end of a programme participants are asked to complete the following feedback form, included are samples of their comments, which have been chosen at random. Your feedback can help greatly with the design and structure of future programmes; we would be interested to ascertain what you found u­seful, as well as what was unhelpful. All comments recorded will be anonymous. What were your expectations before attending the programme? I was very open minded about attending the programme, I came hopeful that I would gain some insight that would help me in my current situation. To learn techniques that will enable me to cope with day‐to‐day life. I was hoping to explore mindfulness to help with my pain issues. My expectations were that practising mindfulness was easier than it actually is. I wanted to learn the ‘nuts and bolts’ of mindfulness in a non‐secular way. I wasn’t sure, although I think I may have been a little sceptical about what the outcomes may be. What do you feel you have taken from the programme that may be useful in your daily life? I have made time to be still, and to take life at a slower pace. Slowly becoming aware of how I am holding tension in the body, this is  important as I have chronic pain, learning to relax and adjust my position to release this.

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I use the breathing space daily, especially when I notice that I am judging myself too harshly for the things I assume I do wrongly. Noticing the impact on how I now react to life events, from the little things to the more intense. I now give myself time and space, and don’t feel guilty for doing so. Acceptance, which in turn has helped me become less stressed. Life hasn’t changed, but how I am dealing with things has. Would you recommend the programme to others? If yes, how do you feel others would benefit? They would certainly learn new skills, new ways to think, make the time to stop and review their lifestyle or difficulties they may be facing. Many of the people I meet in everyday life seem anxious, I’m sure practising mindfulness could help this. I have become aware of the importance of living in the now, choosing to forgive, slowing down, and learning to appreciate the moment. If the time is taken to learn to understand what the body is telling us, and to assess thoughts and feelings without judgement, then many may benefit from attending. This is a new approach for me in these stressful and anxious times, I think others may also benefit. Definitely, as long as it was the right time in their lives to attend, the programme can be challenging. What has motivated or inspired you to complete the programme? The little signs that I was becoming less anxious, and how each session built upon the last. The feeling of control that arose in situations, it seemed I was taking back control of my life. The support from the whole group, week on week, when things went wrong I could sometimes respond without all the stress, which inspired me. Almost immediately I could see what the benefits were, each week the practices became more influential. The other participants were very supportive and, although I was nervous at first, I become more confident and began to share my experiences of the practices. This new‐found strength motivated me to not let my anxiety take hold and to continue. The fact that I could be myself, not be judged, and go at my own pace, made attending a positive experience. Will you continue to practice?

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I certainly will, and re‐read the poems and readings that were so helpful. By continuing my practice I will hopefully become more skilful in c­hallenging situations, I have begun to notice this, so there is no way I am stopping. Yes, I have enjoyed the programme immensely and know I will continue. Initially I will practice the body scan and breathing spaces due to my health, however, I would like to eventually include movement. I will continue to do the core practices and the routine activities, which I find so useful. Definitely, yes, in fact I seem to be practising more as time passes, this has surprised me. I will. I also intend to explore keeping a mindfulness practice journal, I think it will be interesting to look back and reflect. If yes, what elements of the programme will you maintain? The breathing space as a daily routine practice, plus adding body scan and sitting meditations during my week. Persevering with all core practices, integrating practice into daily life is difficult; I am trying to be patient and kind to myself. Regular formal practice, especially the sitting meditation. If I have l­imited time during the day, I try to focus my attention on what I am doing right now. I practice everything from the programme, but also set an intention to be kinder towards myself on a daily basis. I will be continuing and looking to consolidate my formal practice. I am sure there will be times when practice fluctuates, however, I have really enjoyed the programme, and it has proved to be a significant part of my life. I will practice the core meditations and the breathing space; this short practice has become my strategy for when I feel things are getting out of control. Comments from Participants on Completing the Programme

Anon: For more than six years I was the main carer for both my elderly parents. I was diagnosed with CFS during the early stages of this period of my life. I subsequently struggled energetically to care for my parents, who I loved dearly, and to enable them to live in their own home, their profound wish. My own needs became neglected and a cycle and repeated pattern of stress and tiredness ensued.

Bringing it Together, Looking after Yourself, and Moving Forward

Since my late youth I had always had a great interest in consciousness and my inner life. During this very difficult time, however, I felt overwhelmed and swamped, and this essential part of my life was submerged. Enter mindfulness. From my very first session, which was recommended by my CFS therapist, it felt as if I was touching home and my inner candle had been blown on by a gentle breeze and its flame burned a little brighter. I was getting what I desperately needed  – a chance to reconnect with myself. Kate: Through the practice of mindfulness I have been able to watch the clutter, instead of believing the clutter. Each day is different and the clutter varies, but it’s so much better observing it than getting caught up in it! And the thing I love most about Mindfulness, apart from my own personal benefit, is that it is a practice that can help everyone – young and old. In a stressful world, Mindfulness offers an opportunity forward, a way to reduce stress in one’s everyday life, a chance to live in the moment and truly be oneself. Rome wasn’t built in a day and Mindfulness requires practice and c­ommitment, but the benefits are invaluable! Linda: Participating on this course has been incredibly helpful and I am very grateful that I could have this opportunity. I found the process challenging at times, but always felt comfortable and at ease; I found the way of conveying the meaning and ideas behind mindfulness very interesting and effective, with so much kindness. I always left the course feeling good, in general, and most of all hopeful, something I haven’t felt in a long time. I have many friends having a hard time dealing with stress during the process of writing a PhD, and I will recommend mindfulness to them as something to hold on to, as it has become for me. Sofia: As was said many times, it’s a lifelong learning process and there is much still to learn and practice, but I have experienced the proverbial ‘click’ in my mind, and I owe that to the programme. To change something about yourself is very hard and needs constant effort, but I think this has helped me take the first step, and for that I will always be grateful. Abbie: I have to say that attending the programme has impacted hugely upon my life, especially in my personal life. I am no longer stressed and anxious about where my life is going, and the pressures that I was putting on myself in my relationship have disappeared, so much so that my b­oyfriend can’t believe some of the words that come out of my mouth!

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I still struggle with keeping my cool at work, with certain emails, but I certainly don’t dwell and over‐think things as much as I used too! Steve: I found attending the programme very worthwhile, and it is m­aking a difference in my daily life. I did a lot of research before I attended, including looking at the evidence for the effectiveness of mindfulness practices in promoting positive thoughts and the ensuing mental and physical health benefits. It just goes to show that science often follows ancient wisdom! The group format also appealed, I enjoyed it, as did all the other p­articipants as far as I could see.

­My Experience of Mindfulness Meditation The following comments where made by a participant who had attended the Living Mindfully Programme and had been practising diligently for one and a half years. It is a wonderful example of self‐awareness and the process generated by consistent mindfulness practice, no words have been changed in the following observations: Linden: I have now been practising mindfulness for nearly a year and a half. I had tried various kinds of meditation in the past, which I found interesting and helpful in their different ways. However, by the time I came to the Living Mindfully Programme much of this was in the past, and life had taken some tricky twists and turns. I was ready to embrace a meditation practice again, and hopefully allow the benefits of this to filter through into the rest of my life, though without really knowing what those benefits might be for me! Here, in no particular order, are just a few ways in which I feel that mindfulness is making a difference so far. Because of a little previous experience of meditation I felt I had some practice at spotting those surprising little thoughts and feelings that can sneak in unannounced, and also at digging down to reveal motives, opinions, and judgements that are not immediately apparent. I now find that this process is ongoing, that there is more and more to uncover, such as the feeling of sadness behind the angry thought, or the hint of pride that partly motivates the kind act, as well as connections to be glimpsed between the different aspects of my experience. For many years, I have tried working with the breath – and failed! Every time I brought my focus to the breath, my breathing, which had been causing no bother, and minding its own business, would suddenly become laboured, awkward, and uncomfortable, to the point where I really didn’t know how it could really carry on as an unconscious process.

Bringing it Together, Looking after Yourself, and Moving Forward

I can’t really say what has made the difference, but during the last year and a half, I feel I have made friends with my breath and now, when I bring my focus to it, it often gives me a sense of coming home. I am still aware of my breath changing as I bring awareness to it, but without any  discomfort, and I just try to notice what it is like now, without w­orrying about how it has changed, or thinking it should be different from how it is. I am trying to explore in more depth the sensations in my body, noting not only what I can feel on the surface, but in addition trying to ‘see’ inside, and get a greater sense of where a sensation is located. I am using this to seek out more information about any physical discomfort, for example, using awareness to move into the pain in a muscle, or trying to pinpoint the source of a headache. This process in itself often brings some ease. I have always been someone who, as soon as one thing was finished, would be rushing on to the next: the next thought, the next activity, often moving into this before the previous one was given due attention. While sitting in meditation, this has become even more apparent, especially at those times when boredom or frustration comes in (I can’t do this/I don’t like this/it was much better yesterday) and I just want to hear the ­welcome end of session bell! However, with the discipline of staying put and not finishing before that bell, I now find I am a tiny bit better at ‘sitting with’, seeing something through before mentally preparing for the next thing – or at least being aware that I am trying! I still feel these are early days in what I hope is now a life‐long practice. But my experience so far suggests that what I have embarked upon is a real journey of discovery. I truly believe that if I can only travel this road with an open, non‐judging, and compassionate mind, then I will not be disappointed with what I find.

­Summary If we are able to slow down just enough to have some awareness of the frantic nature of modern‐day living, then we can give ourselves the possibility of living a more mindful and nurturing life. Everything we take in through the doorway of our senses will have some impact upon overall well‐being, and the capability to navigate through life’s ups and downs. It is our breath that holds us in the present moment, and it is the commitment to regular mindfulness practice that develops the awareness to see clearly the course of action that serves us best. There is a common misconception that can lead participants astray when programmes are  complete, and they continue the mindfulness journey without the

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support of the teacher and group. This is the tendency to turn to practice only when life becomes difficult. However, it is the regular practice on a consistent basis that supports us through times of difficulty. It is the skills we are able to develop throughout each day that will build the resilience to n­egotiate life’s inevitable unpredictability.

­References Niebuhr, R. (1932). Moral man and immoral society: A study in ethics and politics. New York: Charles Scribner’s Sons. Oliver, M. (1994). Dream Work. New York: Grove Press.

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Angeline I attended the TIME Programme workshops initially as an observer; well that was what I thought, how wrong I was! What I had actually signed up to unbeknown to me was a little voyage of self‐discovery. I had always thought I was assertive, mistake. I had always thought that the reason I hadn’t fulfilled my dreams was because they were impossible to achieve, that was another mistake! I began to understand that my behaviours were instrumental in the paths that I had taken and the events that had happened in my life, and as the mystery unfolded I became very self aware, in a good way. I look at myself differently now, I subconsciously analyse others, and am able to understand why people do what they do and say what they say. The workshops were enlightening, liberating, and inspiring, and have enabled me to understand not only what I want from life, but also equipped me with the tools I need to get what I want from life as well. I could say ‘if only I had done the workshops earlier’, but I have also learned to live in the moment and not to dwell in the past!

Living Mindfully: Discovering Authenticity through Mindfulness Coaching, First Edition. Gary Heads. © 2017 John Wiley & Sons, Ltd. Published 2017 by John Wiley & Sons, Ltd.

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10 ­Integrating Mindfulness and Coaching It is interesting to see the evidence base for the inclusion of mindfulness in personal development and coaching programmes growing in support (Walach, Nord, Zier, Dietz‐Waschkowski, Kersig, & Schupbach, 2007). From a personal perspective, having facilitated mindfulness coaching programmes since 2006, I find myself in little doubt that mindfulness has  the potential to be an immensely powerful and valuable concept. It  is  integrally linked to the transformative and developmental nature of  learning and education, and therefore well suited to coaching and p­ersonal development (Hyland, 2009). As with any facilitation involving mindfulness, the practitioner must have established a solid personal practice. This is imperative to not only maintaining the integrity and authenticity of the teaching, but also to establishing the coaching relationship with the group or individual. For most individuals who attend the workshops and programmes mindfulness will be a very new and unfamiliar concept, they will naturally look towards the facilitator for guidance. However, this will not just be from an instructional standpoint, they will also look to model the attitudes associated with mindfulness by observing how these attitudes are embodied by the mindfulness teacher. Therefore, without the established practice this integral part of the mindfulness coaching process will be omitted. Before exploring how mindfulness‐based coaching is delivered, it is important to distinguish how it differs from conventional coaching. There are on the surface many potential conflicts, yet, as will be explained later, there is a place for both to exist and compliment each other, even within the confines of the same training programme. Most definitions of coaching describe the process as a collaborative relationship between the coach and the client with the aim of accomplishing

Living Mindfully: Discovering Authenticity through Mindfulness Coaching, First Edition. Gary Heads. © 2017 John Wiley & Sons, Ltd. Published 2017 by John Wiley & Sons, Ltd.

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goals set by the client. This is usually done, by setting a series of goals that systematically build towards a desired outcome. The order could look something like the following: Identify the goals that are important to the individual 1) fine tune this to establish specific goals; 2) identify strengths and weaknesses; 3) detail resources; 4) formulate an action plan and timescales. The coach would then monitor and evaluate the progress being made by the client, and modify the action plan based on feedback. In today’s world coaching has established itself as an intervention with wide‐ranging applications. It is commonplace as an approach aimed at alleviating workplace stress, business coaching, communication and leadership skills, team‐building, sales skills, performance coaching, and career coaching. These are just some of the areas in which coaching is recognized as an effective method of achieving results (Grant, Passmore, Cavanagh, & Parker, 2010). According to Witherspoon and White (1996), there are three main coaching styles: skills coaching, performance coaching, and developmental coaching. It is worth defining each of the coaching categories beginning with skills coaching. In many cases skills coaching is the transference of the required skill by the coach who is modelling the skill and behaviour. Often this is done using role play and feedback. This coaching style is commonly found in training around communication, developing presentation skills, and enhancing sales techniques. It is in the domain of the workplace that performance coaching finds its niche. Over a period of time the coach will work with a client to set goals and address any obstacles, while evaluating and monitoring their performance. It is common for organizations to instigate this after a performance review or to assist in a specific workplace project. Developmental coaching is a more comprehensive approach, incorporating both the client’s personal and workplace development. It determines the client’s ability to meet current and future challenges by exploring and understanding themselves, how they relate to others, and the belief systems they have embedded. It may involve looking at the c­lient’s perception of life, emotional regulation, and resilience. It creates space for the client to explore issues, potential options, and formulate action plans. This explanation is a simplistic guide and all three coaching approaches may well overlap in the client’s sessions. It is, however, useful to distinguish between the different approaches.

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­ oaching with Mindfulness and the Potential C Conflicting Approaches When exploring the foundational attitudes of mindfulness it could be argued that at face value they look the polar opposites of how a coach might approach a coaching session with a client. In mindfulness the emphasis is on the authenticity of the present moment, in coaching it is goal‐orientated and so future‐focused. If the focus is on achieving a designated goal, then an element of striving towards that goal is natural. Where does this sit with the mindfulness attitudes of non‐striving and letting go? By setting a goal and systematically working towards its realization, there has to be a conscious shift into ‘doing mode’, driven by a desire to change. Again, this appears to be contrary to accepting the p­resent moment and cultivating ‘being’ rather than ‘doing’. When setting a desired objective, can progress be sustained without an attachment to the outcome? Does motivation remain if an attitude of non‐attachment is  in place? Upon reflection, it looks like there are potentially many c­onflicting areas that would need to be addressed if mindfulness and coaching were to be successfully combined as an intervention. However, feedback from participants on mindfulness‐based coaching programmes seems to suggest otherwise. The words so often used by individuals when sharing aspirations for the future are ‘authentic’ and ‘passion’. If mindfulness is being with the authenticity of the moment, and seeing clearly experiences as they are, then surely this would influence the decisions made when setting a new direction in life? This is the pattern that reoccurs in workshops and programmes when mindfulness is introduced. The choices participants make seem to be based on fulfilment rather than need; they are fuelled by passion, rather than driven by past conditioning and habitual thinking. Many of the individuals I have worked with have been locked into situations for sustained periods of time, such as long‐term unemployment; it is not unusual to have someone arrive who has been out of work for between one and five years. In these circumstances getting the client to set goals and plan ahead can be extremely difficult. Prolonged periods of unemployment can lead to habituation, and automaticity, with individuals adapting or learning to be unemployed. This habituation and t­endency to live on automatic pilot can be prevalent in the workplace, in business, in our relationships, in fact, in any repetitive element of life. It  is here that mindfulness coaching holds great promise. By engaging with daily life with an attitude of beginner’s mind and curiosity, the veil of conditionality and habit can be lifted; this then allows new authentic possibilities to emerge. These possibilities may not always be specific, but at this stage it is more about the journey, setting the direction, and

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exploring the terrain. If life has become submerged in familiarity the most important thing is to move forward or, as described by participants, ‘to become unstuck’. Working in this way will create options to be explored, and through mindfulness these opportunities can be considered in a non‐judgemental and compassionate manner. When a plan of action has been formulated, then goals can be identified and the client and coach can work together to achieve the desired outcome. It is mindfulness that provides the clarity to see the authentic way forward, and it is coaching that provides the road map leading to the destination.

­ ow Mindfulness Can Enhance Coaching H Performance It would be fair to say that many occupations are repetitive, and because of this it would be unrealistic to expect to maintain concentration and focus for long periods without the mind wandering and a certain amount of autopilot to arise. Coaching certainly falls into this category, but there are many other issues that arise in the coaching process. The addition of mindfulness techniques in coaching practice can be beneficial in addressing these issues; therefore, the development of a daily mindfulness practice can benefit both the coach and the client. The following are some of the areas in which mindfulness may prove valuable.

­Preparing to Coach or Teach It can sometimes feel like daily life is constantly accelerating, and that the demands placed upon already limited time are leaving few occasions to reflect or prepare. This can lead to a reduction or even the disappearance of any opportunity to sit quietly before engaging with the next client or group. There may be no opportunity to allow the rigours of the day so far to dissipate, and to bring awareness and focus back to the present moment. It is here in these moments that having an established mindfulness practice can be useful. Just taking a few minutes to check in with body and mind can have a profound impact upon the ability to remain centred and grounded. Taking a few minutes to step back and observe arising thoughts, physical sensations, emotions, and feelings, without judgement, is a skilful and powerful technique. Developing this short practice can help to maintain a sense of composure, steadiness, and equilibrium during the day. Depending upon the time available a breathing space can be introduced between clients if coaching on a one‐to‐one basis. If delivery is in a group format, there will be occasions when the

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attention can simply be returned to the breath for a few moments, before re‐engaging with the programme. It is important to also bring mindfulness practice to the beginning and end of the working day, coming back to the present moment as each transition is made.*

­Maintaining Focus No matter how skilled at paying attention and listening a human being is judged to be, the issue of losing focus and concentration through mind wandering is perhaps always deemed ‘work in progress’. Enhancing one’s awareness of where the attention has drifted to and mindfully returning that attention to focus on the task at hand, is an invaluable asset to the coach. The consequences of developing awareness through mindfulness practice will weave their way through the ability to listen and communicate, whilst being present and attentive to the client’s needs. It is inevitable that previous experiences will be drawn upon regardless of the work engaged in, although in many cases these experiences produce the skills that develop proficiency and expertise in the chosen field. However, they also have the capacity to create judgements, conditioning, and habitual thinking. Using the concept of mindfulness in coaching practice may not only improve the ability of the coach to stay present and focus, but can also contribute to an improved overall performance in the session (Passmore & Marianetti, 2007). The ability to listen and communicate mindfully is a precious gift not only for coaches, but also for humanity. Dialogue is often driven by reactivity, swept along by emotion and structured from habit, rather than content. Something as simple as pausing before answering can be a profound act that creates the space to honour what is being said, ensuring the reply is wise and skilful. That pause can simply be the recognition of an in‐breath and an out‐breath. When in the process of coaching an individual or group the attention can be pulled away by any number of distractions, it is not just the wandering mind that can cause this disengagement from the present moment. Concentration and focus can be lost due to the attention being drawn towards visual distractions, movement, smells, physical sensations, emotions and feelings, sounds, as well as the thinking process. It is easy to get lost in any of these distractions, and to be unaware that the attention has drifted away from the task currently engaged in. With regular mindfulness practice the skill of noticing, and the development of awareness, can assist in recognizing those moments when distraction has opened *Instructions for completing a breathing space can be found in Chapter 7 under the section Transcript: Breathing Space, or downloaded here ‐ http://www.livingmindfully.co.uk

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the door that leads to mindlessness. Through this insight the attention can be returned to the present moment and to re‐engaging with the c­urrent activity. The following practice can be useful when building the skill of noticing and awareness; it can be practiced anywhere, and with whatever time is available.

­Practice: Working with Distractions If completing this practice at home, then choose to adopt a dignified posture as described at the beginning of the mindfulness practices in this book. If informally, perhaps at work, then finding a comfortable position, preferably with the feet firmly placed on the floor. If this is not possible, it is acceptable to lie down or remain standing. If possible, gently close the eyes, and take a moment to connect with the body and any sensations that are arising from the chosen posture. This may include sensations of contact, the touch of clothing, temperature, and physical sensations both pleasant and unpleasant. Take a few minutes to be with whatever sensations are arising and passing moment by moment. When ready, gently resting the attention on the next breath, and being with each in‐breath and out‐breath for its full duration, noticing all the sensations that are created by breathing. In this practice the emphasis is not on staying with the breath, but rather on what is taking the attention away. The breath will naturally be the anchor, just bring curiosity and interest to exploring what is diverting attention away from the breathing process. It may be that what arises is an awareness that the focus has shifted from the breath to a particular thought. There may be no awareness of what triggered this shift; at other times the sequence of events leading to the distraction might be seen clearly. This simple exercise is a valuable addition to personal mindfulness practice. There is no striving to hold the attention on the breath, just an awareness of what has interrupted our concentration. It can develop curiosity, noticing, letting go, and the ability to track the sequence of experiences that takes attention away from the current activity, in this case awareness of the breath. So, using the breath as the focus of attention, and every time the breath is lost to distraction explore what has diverted that attention. Allow enough time to observe and explore before eventually coming back to the in‐breath and out‐breath. It may be that some distractions are linked, for instance, sounds can produce memories and emotions. Physical sensations can create thoughts that trigger worry. Remember that there is no need to judge any of this, it is just to be observed and let go, as attention

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is returned to the breath. After a while, it may be that distractions diminish and become less frequent. Attention to the breath may strengthen, and familiar patterns, habits, reactions and responses, are noticed as the flow of experience unravels. When the allotted time has expired, gently return to the breath and then to sensations of contact as the practice is brought to a close. It is important to clarify that this is a practice to be added to an existing personal mindfulness practice, and is not something that would be suitable for an inexperienced meditator.

­Emotional Detachment The American Psychological Association defines resilience as the process of adapting well in the face of adversity, trauma, tragedy, threats or even significant sources of threat. A more common definition often used is ‘the ability to bounce back from stressful situations’ (Arnett & Tanner, 2006). It is a much sort‐after commodity; training programmes are littered with the word ‘resilience’ as businesses seek to instil this ability in their employees. The quest to introduce this skill is far‐reaching. At the other end of the spectrum, schoolchildren are learning mindfulness to promote ‘resilience’ to help them cope with increasing pressure and anxiety around exam expectations. One area that mindfulness training appears to positively affect is distress tolerance, that is, the ability to observe thoughts, feelings, and symptoms, and to endure, leading to the development of new strategies in regulating emotions (Linehan, 1987). Recent research has sought to track the neural correlates of mindfulness to further strengthen this theory (Lutz et al., 2014). The findings suggest that mindfulness training can have a positive impact upon those who suffer from anxiety by reducing emotional reactivity and enhancing e­motion regulation. In view of current research, it might be accepted that mindfulness could be effective in providing the coach with a certain degree of emotional resilience and improved behavioural regulation (Keng, Smoski, & Robins, 2011). Being aware of changing moods and emotions during a coaching session may help the coach to empathize with the client’s current situation, without being drawn into the interaction emotionally. This awareness of emotional reactivity can provide the opportunity for a  more responsive approach, which may allow the coach to challenge where appropriate and provide constructive feedback. Bringing mindfulness to a coaching session can provide a sense of being grounded, a solid base from which to bring awareness to experiences arising in the c­lient–coach interaction. This emotional balance, acceptance of internal

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experiences, and regulation of moods is described as ‘equanimity’ (Hayes & Feldman, 2004). In clinical studies the term ‘decentring’ is often used to define how mindfulness‐based interventions can facilitate an ability to experience thoughts and emotions without becoming distressed by them (Feldman, Greeson, & Senville, 2010). The ability to remain calm in the midst of an emotional exchange with a client, or group, is a powerful asset. That steadiness will allow the wise mind to make the correct choices, to ask the intuitive questions, and to hold the space for the client or group responses to emerge.

­Empathy It is generally maintained that empathy is ‘the ability to experience and understand what others are feeling without confusion between oneself and others’ (Decety & Lamm, 2006). In coaching the consistent exposure to the suffering of others can cause the coach to experience a certain degree of transference, leading to personal distress. A coach with an established mindfulness practice may have developed a more flexible approach to arising thoughts and emotions, seeing them as passing mental events rather than facts. This approach may allow the coach to be empathetic towards the client, while at the same time regulating his or her own emotions, thus improving focus and the ability to remain p­resent during the session. In a study by Elizabeth Kingsbury (2009), the relationship between mindfulness and empathy was explored with interesting results. The areas of research were: Perspective‐taking: this is the tendency to take on the views of others in interpersonal situations. Empathetic concern: experiencing feelings of care and concern towards others. Personal distress: reacting with discomfort to the emotional experiences of others. The suggestion that mindfulness practice can provide the coach with an ability to step back from emotional reactions and personal distress whilst still remaining empathetic to the clients needs are borne out in this study. Findings show that those individuals with high levels of mindfulness were more likely to report high levels of perspective‐taking and low levels of personal distress. It is also implied that cultivating mindfulness has the strong potential to enhance feelings of empathy as well as compassion for oneself and for others. Bringing kindness and compassion to oneself, and to those we work with, is fundamental in creating a

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safe and accepting environment that is conducive to promoting authentic personal growth. Over the past two decades research findings have consistently confirmed that mindfulness increases empathy and compassion, both for others and towards oneself (Shapiro & Izett, 2008).

­Awareness of Habitual Patterns and Perceptions The interpersonal skills we use to communicate with other people both individually and in a group scenario can be littered with habitual and conditioned reactions. It is not that we need to rid ourselves of these habits, but rather develop the awareness to notice them when they arise. The tendency to become judgemental, for example, is a common habit that we can bring to our work. This is a two‐way process, we can judge ourselves if we are struggling in a coaching session, perhaps becoming distracted or unable to develop any kind of rapport with our client. Or we could find ourselves becoming judgemental, triggered by what our client is telling us and our emotional responses to that information. Based on previous experiences the mind may also enter into judgemental thinking and misguided perceptions, and decide that we know exactly what the client is talking about and the potential solution. You could say that this is our expert mind, driven by overconfidence, and activated by past successes. Another area that impacts upon our ability to stay present and focused in our work is the development over time of routines (Silsbee, 2004). We can automatically follow a pre‐set and habitual way of approaching a coaching or training session that runs the risk of not paying attention, or not being open to developing new possibilities and skills. Unfortunately, the tendency to fall into habits, perceptions, and routines brings an unawareness of what is actually happening in the moment. We are therefore not present with the client, and our ability to listen and communicate skilfully is compromised. The capability to remain present and attentive is no more imperative than when teaching in a group scenario. The diversity of personalities, experiences, and psychological and physiological issues contained within the confines of each group will influence the ever‐shifting dynamics that the coach will need to work with and manage. When situations arise the tendency can be to rely on what has worked in the past, this can be i­nitiated automatically and without the consideration of alternatives. Mindfulness can help us to see clearly when we are being drawn into these automatic and reactive habitual patterns. It perhaps fosters a more intuitive approach that allows us to not only to stay present, but also to hold the balance between intuition, experience, and the theory that

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underpins our training. Mindfulness can create the time and space to consider options, to reflect, to make choices that feel authentic to the moment. It can instil confidence that encourages the coach to venture beyond habits, perceptions, and routines into a terrain driven by curiosity and guided by insight.

­One‐to‐One or Group Training Programmes You could argue a case for both these options and, of course, there is a place for both, however, when integrating mindfulness and coaching my personal preference is working in a group scenario. There is something about the collective wisdom that emerges from a group that can provide the dynamic to take everyone forward. It is often shared in mindfulness practice groups that the energy when meditating collectively is very different to practising individually. The general consensus being that it is easier to maintain daily practice with the support of fellow meditators. What is important when delivering mindfulness‐based coaching is to harness that collective energy and use it to motive the group towards their chosen objectives. In terms of the TIME programme described in this book, that chosen objective would be goals linked to authentic life purpose. In relation to individual coaching, the advantage here is that the client drives the topics explored. This can, however, be a very intense process for both coach and client. Certainly, in my experience of working with the long‐term unemployed and vulnerable teenagers, the intensity of one to one can stall progress. In contrast, a group scenario has the potential to provide the support necessary to allow all participants to flourish, learn, and grow at a pace that is acceptable to each individual. It permits participants to take a step back, or forward, to choose to listen, and to learn from others. It would also be wise to consider the impact arising from a group c­ollaborating on mutually desired outcomes. If the group is made up of currently unemployed individuals all looking to change their lives, then that shared human experience is a powerful motivator. The support offered within the group can stimulate creativity, self‐acceptance, compassion towards others, and perhaps alleviate the isolation that can easily arise when locked into difficult situations. By definition mindfulness encompasses a state of self‐acceptance, an acceptance and exploration of present‐moment experience, rather than the focus of attention being on self‐evaluation or self‐criticism (Carson & Langer, 2006). Therefore, within the confines of the group, individuals can begin to foster the ability and the willingness to just be themselves, to be authentic. There is no need to seek the approval of others, or the need to reinforce a fragile

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self‐esteem. When the mind lets go of comparison and shifts into a more intuitive approach, the boundaries that have been built on past conditioning can suddenly expand into new territory. This is the potential a group‐based programme can offer. In some cases, one to one will be a suitable alternative, perhaps for those with high levels of anxiety, stress, or panic disorder, who may find a group scenario intimidating.

­Summary Introducing mindfulness into daily life can have a transformational effect upon the individual. If the commitment is made to develop daily practice, then the results of that effort can reverberate throughout all aspects of one’s life. If a coach elected to follow this path, then the influences and attitudes associated with mindfulness practice would naturally permeate into their coaching. For some, this may be sufficient. For those wishing to  teach mindfulness‐based coaching and deliver mindfulness‐based training programmes, the potential of working with individuals and groups to discover an authentic life purpose is an exciting and rewarding prospect.

­References Arnett, J. J., & Tanner, J. L. (Eds.). (2006). Emerging adults in America: Coming of age in the 21st century. Washington, DC: American Psychological Association. Carson, S. H., & Langer, E. J. (2006). Mindfulness and self‐acceptance. Journal of Rational‐Emotive & Cognitive‐Behavior Therapy, 24(1), 29–43. Decety, J., & Lamm, C. (2006). Human empathy through the lens of social neuroscience. Scientific World Journal, 6, 1146–1163. doi: 10.1100/2006.221. Feldman, G., Greeson, J., & Senville, J. (2010). Differential effects of mindful breathing, progressive muscle relaxation, and loving kindness meditation on decentering and negative reactions to repetitive thoughts. Behavioral Research and Therapy, 48(10), 1002–1011. doi: 10.1016/ j.brat.2010.06.006. Grant, A., Passmore, J., Cavanagh, M., & Parker, H. M. (2010). The state of play in coaching today: A comprehensive review of the field. International Review of Industrial and Organizational Psychology, 25, 125–167. Hayes, A. M., & Feldman, G. (2004). Clarifying the construct of mindfulness in the context of emotional regulation and the process of change in therapy. Clinical Psychology, 11(3), 255–262. doi: 10.1093/clipsy.bph080.

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Hyland, T. (2009). Mindfulness and the therapeutic function of education. Journal of Philosophy of Education, 43(1), 119–131. Keng, S. L., Smoski, M. J., & Robins, C. J. (2011). Effects of mindfulness on psychological health: A review of empirical studies. Clinical Psychology Review, 31(6), 1041–1056. doi: 10.1016/j.cpr.2011.04.006. Kingsbury, E. (2009). The relationship between empathy and mindfulness: Understanding the role of self‐compassion. Available at: psycnet.apa.org. Linehan, M. M. (1987). Dialectical behavior therapy for borderline personality disorder: Theory and method. Bulletin of the Menninger Clinic, 51(3), 261. Lutz, J., Herwig, U., Opialla, S., Hittmeyer, A., Jäncke, L., Rufer, M., … Brühl, A. B. (2014). Mindfulness and emotion regulation: An fMRI study. Social Cognitive and Affective Neuroscience, 9(6), 776–785. Passmore, J., & Marianetti, O. (2007). The coaching psychologist. Available at: Instituteofcoaching.org. Shapiro, S. L., & Izett, C. (2008). Meditation: A universal tool for cultivating empathy. In D. Hick, & T. Bien (Eds.). Mindfulness and the therapeutic relationship (pp. 161–175). New York: Guilford Press. Silsbee, D. (2004). The mindful coach: Seven roles for facilitating leader development. Marshall, NC: Ivy River Press. Walach, H., Nord, E., Zier, C., Dietz‐Waschkowski, B., Kersig, S., & Schupbach, H. (2007). Mindfulness‐based stress reduction as a method for personnel development: A pilot evaluation. International Journal of Stress Management, 14(2), 188–198. Witherspoon, R., & White, R. P. (1996). Executive coaching: A continuum of roles. Consulting Psychological Journal: Practice and Research, 48(2), 124–133. doi: 10.1037/1061‐4087.48.2.124.

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Andrew My whole life had revolved around depression since I was a teenager; now at the age of 39 I was beginning to fear that time was passing me by without any progress being made. Even when I succeeded in finding employment I seemed unable to continue, as my mental health would deteriorate. After registering with a specialist employment team, I was offered a place on a mindfulness programme to help with my confidence and self‐esteem issues. The meditations provided the first moments of calmness for a long time, and the support of the other group members showed me that I was not alone in my fight with depression. When it came to looking at career choices I had no idea until someone in the group pointed out my enthusiasm for gardening, and how know­ ledgeable I appeared to be on the subject. I spend a lot of time in my garden and find it therapeutic, but had never considered that I might make a living from my hobby. I completed my action plan in the pro­ gramme, and with a little financial help from the employment team started a very modest gardening business, it is small, but on most days I have work to do. It is not about the money, although I have to live, its how it makes me feel that makes me passionate about continuing.

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11 ­The TIME Programme Development and Rationale As human beings, our greatness lies not so much in being able to remake the world – that is the myth of the atomic age – as in being able to remake ourselves. (Gandhi) TIME stands for Training Individuals in Mindfulness and Excellence. The excellence is not based on gauging oneself against another, competing for the highest mark, or striving to climb the ladder of perceived success decreed by society. It is about being authentic and true to yourself, having the courage to follow your own path, and being the best you can be. The programme, delivered over four weekly sessions, is taught in a group format with a minimum of eight participants up to a maximum of twelve. The sessions are designed to allow participants to initially reflect on and explore how they have arrived at the situation they find themselves in, and then to see the beliefs, habits, and conditioning that keeps them stuck in this place. I liken this to a ball of yarn, wrapped up tight and a little inflexible. However, if you keep picking at it eventually you unravel it bit by bit. In the later sessions, we look at how we com­ municate with the world around us, and plan a way forward built on authenticity, intuition, and motivation that is driven by purpose rather than necessity. The TIME Programme evolved from a request by Jobcentreplus to address confidence and self‐esteem within their long‐term unemployed clients. The insightful nature of mindfulness, especially around condi­ tioning and habitual thinking, seemed well suited to this task. In addi­ tion, planning a more authentic and meaningful path to employment by systematic goal‐setting would seem a logical conclusion to a mindful­ ness‐based coaching initiative. The initial contract from Jobcentreplus lasted three years, and in that time the outcomes achieved by participants surprised everyone involved in the project. The results even made their way to Westminster with a motion tabled in the House of Commons that Living Mindfully: Discovering Authenticity through Mindfulness Coaching, First Edition. Gary Heads. © 2017 John Wiley & Sons, Ltd. Published 2017 by John Wiley & Sons, Ltd.

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the programme should be rolled out nationally (House of Commons, 2012). Although this is yet to materialise, interest is continuing to grow. The journey that participants embarked upon was littered with unexpected choices and what one might perceive as highly ambitious objectives. However, in many cases those objectives were met. During this three‐ year period over 300 individuals took the voluntary step to engage with mindfulness practice, and to approach their lives from a more authentic standpoint. Later in the chapter we will look at each session and the exercises that  form the foundations for teaching and learning within the programme.

­TIME Research During the three‐year period of working with the long‐term unemployed a research study was carried out to determine the efficacy of the pro­ gramme. One hundred individuals volunteered to be part of the study: 67 female and 33 male, with an average age of 42 (Heads, 2011). The length of time they had been unemployed varied, however, 41% had been out of work for a period in excess of three years. The purpose of the study was to determine the potential impact of the TIME Programme on qual­ ity of life, motivation, and self‐esteem. The results from the analysis sug­ gested that learning mindfulness skills and participating in the mindfulness‐based coaching programme significantly increased partici­ pants’ perception of quality of life and motivation, yet, interestingly, reduced levels of self‐esteem. The results relating to self‐esteem certainly warrant further research. It was noted during programmes that the emergence of authenticity reduced participants’ interest in social com­ parison. Perhaps being true to oneself has the potential to encourage letting go of the need to sustain high self‐esteem? For those interested in training initiatives for unemployed individuals, the research also suggested that older participants might have lower motivation levels, however, younger participants appear to be more susceptible to prolonged periods of unemployment.

­ opulations that have Participated P in the Programme We have discussed the use of the TIME Programme with those that are unemployed, however, the programme has been delivered to various populations with interesting results.

The TIME Programme: Development and Rationale

Displaced Teenagers: 16+

This group of young people had found themselves removed from the family home and living in single rooms in a centre. The issues and con­ cerns within this group were complex, nevertheless, the feeling of being stuck and that things are hopeless is an all too common human experi­ ence. The programme was not adapted for this particular age group, and the only adjustment made was to extend the time period when setting goals, allowing participants to plan their lives for the next five years. This seemed appropriate for this relatively young group. The willingness to make changes and move forward was evident from the start of this pro­ gramme, however, motivation, confidence, and self‐esteem levels were low, and impacting on progress at the first sign of potential failure. The commitment to attending sessions and practice shown by participants resulted in significant shifts in attitude and perception of what was actu­ ally possible. Successes were built upon, and ambitions for the future were elevated. The actions taken and completed within the timeframe of the programme should not be underestimated; several of these vulnera­ ble young adults found the courage to move from the centre to their own accommodation. Others who had identified career paths took the first step by volunteering. This is significant from a motivational and confi­ dence perceptive, but is perhaps more noteworthy due to previous issues with social isolation and anxiety. NHS Health and Well‐being Programme (Trauma): 17+

This was a group currently engaged in a two‐year programme to qualify as a health and well‐being practitioner. The TIME Programme was added as an additional module to assist with ongoing mental health issues e­manating from family trauma, and to address doubts around the cho­ sen career path. The programme was commissioned due to motivation levels reducing after one year of the health and well‐being course, lead­ ing to participants expressing doubts about continuing. The impending exams had resulted in the reoccurrence of anxiety and panic attacks. As the programme progressed, the discussions revolved around lack of confidence, negative beliefs, and fear of failure. This, accompanied by disappointing results upon leaving school, was proving to be instrumen­ tal in creating apprehension and doubts about their ability to complete the exams successfully. The development of present‐moment attention and cultivating a more accepting relationship to thoughts, feeling, and emotions proved to be beneficial to this group. An awareness of what they were bringing to the current situation that was actually based on past events seemed to establish a willingness to reassess and re‐evaluate their position. After the programme was completed two participants

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left the health and well‐being course to pursue alternative careers, whilst the remainder completed their exams and continued into the second year of the course. Single Mothers: 18+

The remit for working with this specific group was to explore the possi­ bilities around employment, education, and aspirations. The individuals involved in the programme all lived in a relatively small community with high unemployment and limited public services. Due to having a young family many suffered from social isolation, depression, anxiety, and financial hardship. In the early stages of the programme the mood within the group appeared low, with many viewing their prospects of moving beyond their current circumstances as an impossible task. As the pro­ gramme evolved participants began to look outside the negativity that had created barriers to progress, they began to commit to mindfulness practice, and their confidence increased. It would have been unrealistic to expect major progress towards employment given the difficult c­ircumstances participants were working with, however, the seeds of p­ossibility seemed to be planted. Some took action around education, rekindling previously disregarded career choices. The inspiring development from this group actually came shortly after the programme ended. Many of the participants had found the sessions a powerful reminder that although you may feel you are alone, there are many in similar positions. This had produced, on occasion, strong emotions and mutual support. In the planning the way forward session (session 4) the major obstacle identified had been childcare. There were limited facilities in the area and they were expensive. As the group had formed a strong bond and new friendships had been formed, the decision was made by participants to form a single mothers support group, and look to provide childcare. Through the dedication of its founding members, the support group has flourished, and has become an important and established part of the local community. Its impact has been recognized by the local authority, which now provides funding for the project. Men’s Support Group (Homeless, Unemployed, Social Isolation)

It is noticeable when working with groups on both the TIME and the Living Mindfully programmes that the make up of those groups can be predominantly female. This is not uncommon in training initiatives, and is a long‐standing issue that increases with the age of the individual (European Commission, 2008). The men’s support group was a local authority project aimed at supporting the homeless, veterans, those

The TIME Programme: Development and Rationale

living alone, and those struggling to find or sustain employment. This project had been running for several years and had a well‐established clientele, however, those attending still lacked the confidence to move forward with their lives. The overriding theme within this group was centred on employment; many members of the group had part‐time work that they described as unfulfilling and without prospects. Most individuals in the programme had high levels of stress, anxiety, and s­uffered from reoccurring episodes of depression. This was initially a d­ifficult group to work with, as most participants seemed to be locked into their current circumstances and struggled to put any kind of positive action in motion. The shift in attitude began when the emphasis on employment was shifted towards life purpose; participants began to explore options based on interests rather than financial necessity. They did this collectively, sharing ideas, and making plans as a unit, the period of time chosen was twelve months. It would be fair to say that not every­ one had identified their chosen career path, however, the group as a whole encouraged those that had to pursue that goal. The feedback at the end of the programme included being less anxious since incorporating mindfulness on a regular basis, and being less stressed about the future; some now viewed their current employment as a necessary step towards a more fulfilling goal. After 12 months two individuals had become self‐ employed, one had returned to college, and another had started training as a chef. All these occupations had been set as goals in the programme. The remaining four members of the group continue to attend the s­upport group. Adapting the TIME Programme to Accommodate Diverse Groups

The delivery and content of the TIME Programme is not usually modi­ fied to account for the varied nature of the groups that engage with it. The discussion and inquiry components of the programme naturally shape the direction advocated by participants in a manner befitting their circumstances and age. However, there are instances when adaptations can be made; for instance, in a younger group the emphasis may be more on planning the way forward than on disassembling past life experiences. The reverse would be appropriate for a more mature group where past conditioning and negative beliefs may be embedded. A younger person may be happy to project and plan five years into the future, but a short period might seem more manageable for someone older. Many of the participants who volunteer to attend the programme have multiple b­arriers to creating positive change in their lives, including suffering from anxiety, depression, or chronic pain. It can be determined in pre‐ programme orientations whether the Living Mindfully Programme

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is more suitable initially followed by the TIME Programme. Alternatively, it is not uncommon for issues to arise in the TIME Programme that w­ arrant participants being offered a place on the Living Mindfully Programme. Preparing to Teach the Programme and Taking Care of Participants

The participants who attend the TIME Programme vary enormously both in age and the circumstances that have conspired and influenced them to attend. The programme is suitable for anyone who wishes to explore an alternative approach to looking at life’s options. It has, however, proven to be especially effective for those currently unem­ ployed, struggling with their chosen vocation, or unable to decide on a career path. Pre‐programme Orientations or Group Orientation Session

Depending upon the make up of your group, it may be necessary to com­ plete pre‐programme orientations. This is especially important if your participants have issues around anxiety, panic disorder, or depression. It will also allow you to check for recent significant life events or past trau­ mas. This will be your first contact with participants and will enable you to see the shape of the group and potential group dynamics. It is not uncommon for this process to be completed by delivering a group orien­ tation session or dedicating the first section of the opening session to explaining how the programme is constructed and taught. It is worth remembering that if you have anxious participants they are less likely to share their concerns in a group orientation, and that an individual tele­ phone orientation will give you the opportunity to deal with potential difficulties. In my experience, the time taken with individual orientations will set the scene for session 1 and will minimize potential drop‐out. This is recommended for most groups, the exception may be a group with an age range between 16 and 21 years where a group orientation might be acceptable. Confidence, How Do You Define It, and Why is It Perceived to be so Important?

It seems that every time an individual or organization approaches me regarding mindfulness and coaching the word confidence arises in the conversation. Perhaps the general view that we hold confident people in such high esteem might go some way to explaining the apparent need to be confident. However, defining what confidence actually is can be

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tricky, it is a very personal issue. In the context of the work delivered for unemployed individuals, under‐confidence had produced an inabil­ ity to move forward, many were unable to make decisions, and had a fear that taking action would result in failure (Elliott & Thrash, 2004). This seems to be particularly evident in older people who have had sustained periods of unemployment or have limited resources to facili­ tate personal development and effective decision‐making (Flude, 2000). Lack of confidence and an inability to act may manifest due to any number of life‐changing events. Certainly, those of us who succumb to illness, whether it is physiological or psychological, can find returning to the workplace or daily life challenging. Losing a job through redun­ dancy can be taken very personally, even though it is the job that is redundant rather than the individual. If we suffer bereavement in the family the reaction to this can produce not only grief, but also cause us to question the purpose of life, our mortality. We could, therefore, define a confident person as someone who takes action and believes that the action taken will achieve success. This could be in reference to specific tasks or a general attitude towards their abilities in life. The trouble is we can also be overconfident and make judgements that are unrealistic. Throughout the research literature, overconfidence has been defined in three distinct ways: (1) overestimation of one’s actual performance; (2) over‐placement of one’s performance relative to oth­ ers; and (3) over‐precision – the excessive certainty regarding the accu­ racy of one’s beliefs (Moore & Healy, 2008). So perhaps confidence is not trying to be better than the next person or blindly ploughing on as if we cannot fail, but rather being comfortable with who we are, what­ ever that happens to be? Basically being authentic and true to ourselves. It may be that the introduction of mindfulness into an individual’s life might prove to be beneficial in providing insights into what authentic­ ity means to them not just in terms of employment, but throughout one’s life. By adopting non‐judgemental and non‐reactive attention to moment‐by‐moment experiences a certain amount of resilience and self‐compassion may be produced. This may aid the recovery process when we find ourselves in the midst of change or trauma. If we feel that life is on hold, and have a sense of fear around taking action and moving forward, then the promotion of an authentic direction can produce sustained motivation and enhanced confidence. This can enable us to learn from the inevitable setbacks and mistakes we make, and keep us on track. Interestingly, the general consensus from research studies tell us that mindfulness practice may produce feelings of self‐worth that are not highly vulnerable to challenge, thus, authenticity is promoted by reducing the need for excessive self‐protection or self‐promotion (Baer & Lykins, 2011).

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What is Self‐esteem?

It is interesting to ask and reflect upon the question ‘what is self‐esteem?’ If you were to look it up in a dictionary or Internet search you will find phrases such as: ‘your opinion of yourself and your worth’, ‘your percep­ tion of your value as a person, particularly in reference to work, status, achievements, purpose in life, your place in society, and how you relate to others’. A simple description might be that of a small child asked by their parents to draw a horse. The child proceeds to make a series of marks and squiggles that to them represent a horse. The parents natu­ rally praise and encourage the child, and the child is pleased and eager to continue. Now, if we fast‐forward to the child beginning school and being asked to draw a horse by their teacher, the outcome may be very different. The teacher may well praise the child for their efforts, but now we have entered the world of comparison and, depending on the skills within the class, the child’s self‐esteem will be higher or lower in com­ parison to how they judge themselves against others. Research tells us that self‐esteem is about how we measure up to the expectations of soci­ ety and the expectations of others (Josephs, Markus, & Tafarodi, 1992). We might therefore use the scale of comparison to judge how we are shaping up, if we are good enough or somehow failing to meet our potential. The benefits to an individual who has high self‐esteem have been well documented. It has been suggested that people with perceived higher levels of self‐esteem will persist longer when faced with the option of failure, or when given an alternative will know when to let go of the original goal. They might also be less likely to become depressed, and respond more skilfully to stress and traumatic events (Baumeister, Campbell, Krieger, & Vohs, 2003). However, the pursuit of high self‐ esteem can come with a downside. It is implied that it is all about trying to satisfy beliefs about what the individual needs to do or be. Success will bring temporary emotional benefits, but failure will have a bigger nega­ tive impact. This quest for self‐improvement and confidence, although at times motivational, can interfere with relatedness, learning, auton­ omy, self‐regulation, and can impact upon mental and physical health (Crocker & Park, 2004). The importance of self‐esteem in today’s society can be summed up by a visit to any bookshop; the self‐help section has grown over the years from one or two books to its own section outright. My thoughts around this in relation to the TIME Programme are that the importance placed upon self‐esteem may not be justifiable, and perhaps through mindfulness lies an alternative approach. If we encourage participants to bring mindfulness into their lives by developing a regular practice, the benefits from this practice may extend

The TIME Programme: Development and Rationale

into an ability to let go of worries about how they are being viewed by others, and perhaps putting aside concerns that they are being judged negatively. The words of Eleanor Roosevelt are a timely reminder at this point: ‘No one can make you inferior without your permission.’ Learning to disengage from negative thoughts about oneself in this way can pro­ mote authenticity and therefore remove the need for social comparison (Carson & Langer, 2006). Letting go of comparing ourselves with others or trying to be the person modern society demands we should be, can lead to functioning in a more authentic way, and this can produce a direction and action that is clearly defined as being right for us. We could describe authentic functioning as having four distinct but inter­ related components: an awareness of one’s self‐aspects; unbiased pro­ cessing of evaluative information; behaviour that is aligned with one’s true self; and a relational orientation with others that fosters openness and connectivity (Heppner & Kernis, 2007). If we explore research in this area, the suggestion is that action that is mindfully informed is more likely to produce integrated authentic functioning, therefore mindfulness and authenticity appear interrelated (Brown & Ryan, 2003). It has been noted through working with hundreds of individuals on the TIME Programme sessions that moving towards goals fuelled by p­urpose and passion can produce resilience to setbacks and failures. It appears that the goals and overall authentic direction set by partici­ pants has a certain amount of immunity to obstacles that hinder p­rogress, and that self‐esteem holds less importance when compared with the end result. Negative Beliefs and Negative Emotions

Negative biases towards processing information about the self have been recognized as a feature in those that suffer from social anxiety and depression. This negative interpretation may well impact on mood and produce low self‐esteem (Fennell, 2004). After a period of time these negative beliefs about ourselves can become embedded, we can live our lives around them without thinking about them, questioning them, or even being aware of them. They can relate to any aspect of life, however, the common belief of ‘not being good enough’ can be particularly destructive, especially when faced with exams, training, interviews, or choosing a career path. This negative pattern of thinking can devalue any existing skills or creativity that the individual may have accumulated. It may result in lower levels of confidence and self‐esteem, as well as lead­ ing to physiological issues, including anxiety and depression. The accept­ ance of negative beliefs without inquiry or reflection is addressed in the  TIME Programme. In addition to developing awareness through

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mindfulness meditation, the conditioned nature of thoughts is also dem­ onstrated by engaging in the visualization of scenarios. The wide-ranging interpretations shared by the group can validate the influence of habitual thinking and conditioning. Reflecting upon how events are perceived can assist in discovering that the beliefs developed as one learns to func­ tion in society and that become embedded by life experiences may now limit creativity, produce ineffectiveness, and create suffering (Silsbee, 2004). The inability to distinguish facts from interpretation can be prob­ lematic for many individuals. Facts that are intertwined with negative beliefs and emotions can result in conclusions that undermine confi­ dence and self‐esteem, leading to anxiety and depression (Teasdale, Moore, Hayhurst, Pope, Williams, & Segal, 2002). It is not necessarily the events in life that cause difficulties, but rather what is being added through interpretation, the assumption made can be tainted by past experience, which results in a conditioned and habitual reaction. If awareness is developed the potential arises to see through these layers of negativity, to let go of out‐dated beliefs, and to fully engage with the actuality of the present moment. Even if we are in the midst of a stressful event the ability to see clearly what is actually happening can allow wise and skilful responses to emerge, turning the event into a more m­anageable experience. Communication

It is perhaps in our verbal interactions with others that positive or nega­ tive traits show themselves most vividly. Interpersonal communication skills are imperative to the ability of human beings to function in society. Without this ability confidence and self‐esteem levels will decrease, negativity will take hold, and helplessness and despair will taint not only the content, but also the body language that accompanies the interac­ tion. Many of the social problems of today can be attributed to interper­ sonal communication difficulties. The reactivity and rapidity at which communication is facilitated can leave very little time for any kind of reasoning or consideration about what is actually being conversed, leading to automatic patterns of speech, driven by emotion, routine or misunderstanding. This form of communication may well be processed superficially, and could be described as rigid, emotion‐based, and mind­ less. At the other end of the spectrum, communication that is consid­ ered as effort fully processed, creative, flexible, and reason‐based might be defined as mindful (Burgoon, Berger, & Waldron, 2000). The impact of mindfulness training on communication is evident in the feedback received from participants; many attend due to workplace stress, including difficulty communicating with colleagues or in some cases

The TIME Programme: Development and Rationale

interacting with clients. The general consensus is that their mindfulness practice has enabled them to take a step back, pause before engaging in conversation, create space to consider what is being said, and to respond appropriately. In terms of working towards authentic goals, the ability to listen, understand, and communicate authentically is imperative to progress. It does, however, require a great deal of practice, and could arguably be the most difficult skill to master in the programme. The time spent on communication skills in the TIME Programme is essen­ tial to the progress participants make in the final session when their plans and goals are put into action. Taking Action and Moving Forward

In the final week of the programme everything evolves around planning and taking action. But perhaps more important are the influences of authenticity and the instilling of passion. This will motivate the individual to continue the journey until fruition. If the end result is something the individual is passionate about, then the chances that they will be successful increase significantly. Although the goals set on the programme might be regarded on paper as highly ambitious, the follow up after completion of the programme bears out this statement. Whether it is a career path or entering the world of business, without passion it seems the outcome is likely to be failure. People who have been highly successful seem to share this view. Those that have built substantial businesses that have literally changed the world suggest that without passion they would have given up on their dream. We can include Steve Jobs the founder of Apple, Richard Branson of Virgin, and Bill Gates of Microsoft in this category. In the last three weeks participants will have begun to introduce mind­ fulness into their lives through short sitting practices and breathing spaces. They will have discussed within their group the origins of their confidence and self‐esteem, and dissected the negative beliefs and emo­ tions that have influenced their lives thus far. All are important facets of change, yet without the communicative skills to listen, assimilate, and convey clearly a reasoned request or response, their carefully constructed action plan will falter. In the planning and goal‐setting session partici­ pants are encouraged to share progress and ideas collectively, and to sup­ port one another.* Some list their goals and time scales, while others *In some cases, depending upon the commissioning body, there are opportunities to further assist participants in attaining goals and completing plans. This should be encouraged and determined at the commissioning stage. Examples of this have included employment advisers and youth centre staff conducting one‐on‐one sessions to maintain progress. It is recommended that participating staff also complete both the TIME and Living Mindfully programmes.

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draw a collage of what the end result will look like; the options are open and individual. Not everyone will have specific goals, some may simply have a direction they feel is worth exploring. If, however, that person has been entrenched in a monotonous and uninspiring existence for a p­rolonged period of time, the promise of travelling in a new direction can be an exciting prospect. The purpose of life is to live it, to taste experience to the utmost, to reach out eagerly and without fear for newer and richer experience. (Eleanor Roosevelt)

­References Baer, R. A., & Lykins, E. L. M. (2011). Mindfulness and positive psychological functioning. Designing Positive Psychology: Taking Stock and Moving Forward, 335–348. Baumeister, R. F., Campbell, J. D., Krieger J. I., & Vohs, K. D. (2003). Does high self‐esteem cause better performance, interpersonal success, happiness, or healthier lifestyles? Physiological Science in the Public Interest, 4(1), 1–44. Brown, K. W., & Ryan, R. M. (2003). The benefits of being present: Mindfulness and its role in psychological well‐being. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 84, 822–848. Burgoon, J. K., Berger, C. R., & Waldron, V. R. (2000). Mindfulness and interpersonal communication. Journal of Social Issues, 56(1), 105–127. Crocker, J., & Park, L. E. (2004). The costly pursuit of self‐esteem. Psychological Bulletin, 130(3), 392–413. Carson, S. H., & Langer, E. J. (2006). Mindfulness and self‐acceptance. Journal of Rational‐Emotive & Cognitive‐Behavior Therapy, 24(1), 29–43. Elliott, A. J., & Thrash, T. M. (2004). The intergenerational transmission of fear of failure. Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin, 30(8), 957–971. European Commission. (2008). European Social Fund. Available at: http:// ec.europa.eu/esf/home.jsp?langId=en, last accessed 29 April 2016. Fennell, M. J. V. (2004). Depression, low self‐esteem, and mindfulness. Behaviour Research and Therapy, 42, 1053–1067. Flude, R. (2000). The journey into work: An innovative approach to tackling long‐term youth unemployment. Economic and Labour Relations Review, 12(1), 18–31.

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Heads, G. (2011). The effects of a mindfulness‐based intervention with long‐term unemployed. (Unpublished MSc thesis), School of Psychology, University of Wales Bangor. Heppner, L. W., & Kernis, M. H. (2007). ‘Quiet ego’ functioning: The complimentary roles of mindfulness, authenticity, and secure high self‐esteem. Psychological Inquiry, 18(4), 248–251. House of Commons. (2012). Debate on Mindfulness‐based Therapy. See at: www.theyworkforyou.com. Josephs, R. A., Markus, H. R., & Tafarodi, R. W. (1992). Gender and self‐esteem. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 6(3), 391–402. Moore, D. A., & Healy, P. J. (2008). The trouble with overconfidence. Psychological Review, 115(2), 502–517. doi: 10.1037/0033‐295X.115.2.502. Silsbee, D. K. (2004). The mindful coach: Seven roles for helping people grow. Marshall, NC: Ivy River Press. Teasdale, J. D., Moore, R. G., Hayhurst, H., Pope, M., Williams, S., & Segal, Z. V. (2002). Metacognitive awareness and prevention of relapse in depression: empirical evidence. Journal of Consulting and Clinical Psychology, 70(2), 275.

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Maria Due to my high levels of anxiety and susceptibility to panic attacks I chose to complete the mindfulness programme with a certain amount of trepidation. I certainly felt anxious at the beginning, but as I completed each week things improved. As I became more confident with the practices so my anxiety reduced, for the first time in years I felt I had turned a corner with my health. This gave me the confidence to continue, so I asked to attend the TIME Programme with the hope that I might discover a way of returning to employment. In my previous jobs I have always felt there was something else I should be doing, and never really put my heart into it. During the programme I realized that the occupation I had dreamed of doing and  constantly dismissed due to my lack of qualifications was to be a midwife. I made my plan of action and began step by step; it looked very daunting, but despite wanting to give up on many occasions I have kept at it. Thanks to the support of my family, and good friends, I am now in my second year at university, and my final goal is in sight. I cannot believe I have come this far; I am proud of my achievements, and also a little sad that my belief that I was not clever enough has held me back for so long.

Living Mindfully: Discovering Authenticity through Mindfulness Coaching, First Edition. Gary Heads. © 2017 John Wiley & Sons, Ltd. Published 2017 by John Wiley & Sons, Ltd.

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12 ­ uthenticity and its Impact upon Confidence A and Self‐Esteem ­Week 1 Once you develop confidence in your own ability, you’ll be able to make a real contribution to creating a better world. Self‐­confidence is very important not in the sense of blind pride, but as a realistic awareness of what you can do. As human beings we can transform ourselves by our good qualities and reduce our faults. Our intelligence enables us to judge what is good from what is harmful. (Dalai Lama)

­The Conditioned Nature of Human Beings The information that is imparted by figures of authority as we navigate through life can often be accepted automatically. This can lead to an individual being confined to a single perspective, and unaware of alternative ways of processing what has been communicated. They may accept their original categorization of material from attitudes learned from others or from their own experiences, therefore becoming cognitively committed to one way of seeing information. When processing occurs in this way the potential for reconsideration and reinterpretation can be discarded. Over a period of time this habitual processing of information can become entrenched, creating a sense of hopelessness that may lead to reduced levels of confidence and self‐esteem (Langer, 1989). Fighting to be that confident and assured individual when life is unsatisfactory or mundane may only result in stress, anxiety, or depression. Perhaps through m­indfulness coaching there may be the emergence of another option, one that fosters an attitude of kindness rather than self‐judgment driven by social comparison. Living Mindfully: Discovering Authenticity through Mindfulness Coaching, First Edition. Gary Heads. © 2017 John Wiley & Sons, Ltd. Published 2017 by John Wiley & Sons, Ltd.

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Research has confirmed the theoretical connection between mindfulness and self‐compassion (Birnie, Speca, & Carlson, 2010); therefore, cultivating this healthy attitude towards oneself may be a viable alternative to the rigours of trying to maintain high self‐esteem. After all, sustaining confidence and self‐esteem is basically a lost cause; somewhere down the line failure and disappointment are inevitable. What is important is how one bounces back from setbacks. Self‐esteem is basically how we see and value ourselves in society, how we shape up compared with others. Confidence, however, is a more complex issue. We can be confident in one area of life, yet under‐confident and ­anxious in another. It could be contended that self‐esteem is more important than self‐confidence, although the two are certainly entwined. Our self‐ esteem can perhaps have a solid foundation when acceptance and authenticity are present, in comparison with confidence, which may fluctuate according to the level of skill we have acquired in any given subject or situation. The search for healthy self‐esteem is viewed as a necessity if we are to function in today’s society; it is seen as highly influential when making choices and decisions, and is a strong positive motivator. Yet the perceived level of self‐esteem a human being possesses causes problems regardless of whether it is high or low. An over‐inflated level can create over‐confidence and delusion, where low self‐esteem may reduce resilience when faced with overcoming problems and a tendency to under‐achieve. Trying to create a balanced level of self‐ esteem is certainly a difficult proposition. There is, however, an alternative approach that is based on a healthy attitude towards oneself, rather than on the fluctuating tides of human experience. After all, the acquisition of high self‐esteem requires feeling special and above average; it is, however, impossible for the whole human race to be above average, therefore, this quest is destined to fail, leaving us at risk of anxiety and depression. It is far better to develop a more compassionate stance, one that responds to events, whether positive or negative, with an attitude of kindness and self‐compassion. We can therefore explore the link between mindfulness and its promotion of authenticity, acceptance, and self‐compassion, and the potential this holds to increase motivation around self‐improvement and continued learning. The cultivation of wisdom through continued mindfulness practice may also impact upon the achievement of personal goals. All that needs to be added is a sprinkle of persistence and a willingness to reflect.

­Compassion as an Alternative to Self‐esteem Self‐compassion has been defined as having three distinct components: self‐kindness, a sense of common humanity, and mindfulness. It may, therefore, be an alternative way to conceptualize a healthy attitude

­Authenticity and its Impact upon Confidence and Self‐Estee

towards oneself without the need to evaluate self‐worth (Neff, 2003). If we approach negative thoughts and emotions in a more mindful way this may produce a balanced perspective with regard to personal failings. This possibility arises if one’s attention is shifted away from elaborate and ruminative processing of thoughts about the self, to a more accepting and non‐judgemental interpretation (Bishop et al., 2004). In addition to correlating self‐compassion with psychological well‐ being, researchers have begun to examine the moderating effects of self‐ compassion in relation to how individuals react to negative events (Leary, Tate, Adams, Batts, & Hancock, 2007). In terms of moving clients beyond their current circumstances, the development of self‐compassion is a core component of the programme and a highly influential aspect of the curriculum. Interestingly, the findings from research are suggesting that self‐compassion may also moderate the reaction to potential failure by reducing the unwillingness to engage in events that potentially threaten self‐esteem (Neff, Hsieh, & Dejitterat, 2005). Certainly, with unemployed individuals the impact of recurrent disappointments only serves to embed fear of failure, resulting in habituation and isolation. Although research studies are fairly limited at this stage, the indications are that self‐compassion is an important construct with regard to facilitating resilience and developing coping skills. The age‐old suggestion that we celebrate successes and learn from our mistakes is perhaps beginning to emerge from research into compassion‐based approaches. In fact, evidence suggests that treating ourselves with compassion can increase our motivation when it comes to self‐improvement. In other words, failure if  approached with self‐compassion may actually make people more motivated to improve themselves (Breines, & Chen, 2012).

­Beginning At the beginning of the first session participants are introduced to mindfulness meditation by completing a 20‐minute body and breath meditation. This is an opportunity for the group and teacher to settle into the present moment, to arrive. The practice is repeated at the end of the session, this format is established throughout the programme. During the session it can be helpful to instigate a breathing space if the group appears anxious or participants are diverting attention away from the current exercise or discussion. The first session addresses the issue of humanity’s susceptibility to regression into the past or projection into the future when processing information and making decisions. The emphasis is primarily focused on how automatically this is triggered and, alternatively, just how much is noticed when the attention is brought to

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the present moment. We actually spend most of our waking hours with the mind in autopilot mode, drifting between the past and future rather than paying attention to now. This can cause problems as our thinking can potentially intensify any suffering we may be experiencing. The experience of feeling pain is a useful example; there is no doubt that the ­experience will create a certain degree of suffering, however, thoughts about how bad it is or will it ever go away can increase the suffering. These thoughts may also create emotions and feelings that have the capability to increase suffering further (Marchand, 2013). The same p­rocess is applicable to any experience. The layers we add automatically without awareness can not only affect our well‐being, but also keep us locked in situations that with insight we would change. It is only in the present moment that the seeds of change can be cultivated and new directions found.

­The Autopilot State of Mind As we have discussed, the theme of automatic pilot is introduced in the very first session. It usually makes quite an entrance. The exercise used to demonstrate the tendency to drift into autopilot involves bringing the mindfulness attitude of beginner’s mind to an object, to look at it as if for the first time. Often a grape or raisin is used, observing, feeling, listening, smelling, and tasting the object as if it had never been seen before (see page 59). The experience of eating a grape in this way can for some be very insightful. It really flags up how little attention we pay to routine activities and how eating can be an automated procedure. Common themes that emerge from this exercise can include the surprise at how wonderful it tasted, even though they may have eaten them for years. In some cases, the opposite occurs and after years of eating grapes they suddenly find them unpalatable. After completing this exercise most people agree that by paying attention in this way their experience shifted, they moved in those moments out of automatic pilot and into an awareness of what was actually happening in each moment. This awareness then creates choices and we can respond to the experience wisely. The humble grape has indeed become a wise sage. It is useful to reflect on just how many experiences are missed or perceived to be a certain way because the mind has zoned out. Every moment lost to unawareness is a moment of life that has been surrendered. It would be staggering if those moments could be calculated over an average lifetime, the actual time spent in the here and now might be surprisingly short. Drifting into daydreaming to alleviate the mundane aspects of life may seem like a harmless activity. Taking ourselves off to potential holidays or

­Authenticity and its Impact upon Confidence and Self‐Estee

engaging in fantasies can have the effect of making life a little bit more interesting. It is almost like having a parallel universe that we can dip into, wander around, and perhaps create a new lifestyle. However, the parallel universe of the past and future is driven by mood, and low mood may lead us into negativity, anxiety, and sadness; we can become lost, lost to the moment and to who we really are. It is not only in those tasks that we perceive to be monotonous and uninteresting that autopilot emerges. It can spread, like a delicate shroud, binding us to our conditioning and habitual patterns, reaching out like the morning fog across our entire existence. It can wind around work, relationships, and communication, suppressing the authenticity of the present moment and leaving us with the impression that everything is dull and unsatisfactory. Throughout life there will be times when the grip of autopilot is so strong that days, weeks, even years roll by at an alarming rate. It might be that we find ourselves in a job that is paying the bills, but leaving us with an intuitive sense of having taken the wrong career path, it is perhaps autopilot that provides the salvation to continue. Alternatively, we may be unable to find work, and find each day being greeted by hopelessness and despair. In these times it is journeying into unawareness, perhaps as a form of escapism, that might seem an appealing option, it gets us  through the day. However, those moments that are sacrificed to i­nattentiveness are moments lost forever. Where the mind wanders into autopilot, the reactive choices that are made do not always happen by chance. As we progress through life c­ertain individuals assert a degree of authority and influence that can be instrumental in determining the direction taken and choices made in all aspects of life. Parents, for instance, shape our early years, whilst brothers and sisters can impact upon behaviour, confidence, self‐esteem, and aspirations. When school age is reached, there is the sudden discovery that there is a whole new world waiting. This is the world of comparison, where each individual is ranked above or below another. Intelligence is determined by exams, and the influence of teachers becomes paramount in our development as adults. There are two kinds of intelligence: one acquired, as a child in school memorizes facts and concepts from books and from what the teacher says, collecting information from the traditional sciences as well as from the new sciences. With such intelligence you rise in the world. You get ranked ahead or behind others

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in regard to your competence in retaining information. You stroll with this intelligence in and out of fields of knowledge, getting always more marks on your preserving tablets. There is another kind of tablet, one already completed and preserved inside you. A spring overflowing its springbox. A freshness in the centre of the chest. This other intelligence does not turn yellow or stagnate. It’s fluid, and it doesn’t move from outside to inside through the conduits of plumbing‐learning. This second knowing is a fountainhead from within you, moving out. (‘Two Kinds of Intelligence’, Rumi, in Banks & Moyne, 2009) By the time life’s journey is begun as an adult, any authenticity emanating from childhood may have been diluted by information that has been dictated by the experiences and attitudes of others. It can be basically taken as read, the truth, and viewed as the only perspective available. This conditioning forms the habitual patterns that weave their way into thoughts, daydreams, plans, and aspirations, the same thoughts that are visited in those moments of unawareness on autopilot. Sooner or later something will trigger the realization that there might just be another way, that there might be other choices to consider, other journeys to make. Intuition perhaps holds the answer, but we should not underestimate the power of our friend the humble grape to awaken us to the p­ossibility in each moment. How we react to what life presents us can also be determined by an automated and conditioned choice, rather than a more intuitive and reflective approach. We can live our lives around core beliefs whether they happen to be positive or negative without even thinking about them, questioning them, or even being aware of them. Positive and negative influences that have evolved through childhood, education, and into working life can form the building blocks from which an interpretation and understanding of life’s experiences is formed. When information is processed in this way the potential for reconsideration can be overlooked. Over a period of time this habitual processing of information can become entrenched, and may dent both confidence and self‐esteem. Taking some time to reflect upon how events are p­erceived can help in the exploration and discovery that many of one’s current beliefs, which have been developed through learning to function

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in society, may now be limiting. They can stifle creativity, and can a­ctually produce anxiety and fear when a new challenge presents itself. Exercise: Influences

The following exercise is a powerful reminder of how easily we can be influenced not only in childhood, but also throughout adult life. It can be an emotional process, especially around negative influences and difficult periods in life. At least 1 hour should be allocated, however, on many occasions due to unfolding group discussions that time has been extended. This is encouraged; a sense of shared human experience is a significant motivating dynamic within a group, as well as enhancing the collaborative nature of the programme. In this exercise the invitation is to explore the people and events that have been influential in shaping life to date. It can be useful to make notes as recollections arise not only as a reminder, but also more importantly as a guide to any themes or patterns that may be revealing themselves. Where this exercise is begun is irrelevant, it could be approached systematically or at random. It might be that the chosen topic is to reflect upon who influenced career choices, including any that may have been discarded as unrealistic. It may be exploring the influence of a family member who encouraged a certain direction or discouraged following a particular path. Or, alternatively, starting at the beginning of life and working forward, there may be obvious periods when there was encouragement or pressure to conform to other people’s views and opinions. At this stage there is no need to analyse or form opinions, simply make a note of events that are considered important and anyone that may have contributed to the decision‐making process whether it is judged to be positive or negative. Remember that there may be occasions when there have been several influences, some encouraging a certain direction with others actively disagreeing. It can be helpful to approach this as if plotting a map, gently exploring the terrain, noticing when the journey seems to flow, and at other times becomes stuck or automated. When a selection of events and influences has been detailed, choose one randomly for further reflection.

­Reflective Practice Take some time to sit quietly in a place where you will not be disturbed. Begin by gently closing the eyes and bringing awareness to the body sitting, noticing where in the body you have a sense of being supported. Allow time to drop in to this posture and welcome the opportunity to be still.

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When you feel relatively settled, gently move your attention to the breath. Notice where in the body the breath is most prominent  –  abdomen, chest, mouth, or nose – then bring careful attention to each breath from this point. The attitude to bring to the breath is one of beginner’s mind, exploring each breath as if it was the very first breath you have taken. If it helps concentration you can mentally say ‘in‐breath, out‐breath’. Work with the breath in this way for around 10 minutes, although longer is fine. You will notice that there are times when the mind pulls you away from the breath into thinking, this is not a mistake or something exclusive to you, it is very much a shared human experience. When you notice this has happened, simply acknowledge that the mind has wandered and bring attention back to the breath. After a chosen period of time allow the breath to fade into the background and bring to the fore an event from your list. As you visualize the event, rather than asking yourself analytical questions surrounding the circumstances that led to the decision, ask yourself ‘does it feel like I made the right choice?’ Gradually get a sense of any thoughts, sensations, or emotions that are arising. Intuition will unravel the answer if you allow whatever arises to simply be there. By  not striving to find the answer or pushing away difficult thoughts, emotions, or sensations, the space will be created that will hold everything in awareness. If you stay with this process, the initial thoughts will drift away allowing deeper insights to emerge. When a truly authentic thought or emotion arises you will know. This is difficult to describe in words, it is a felt sense, but above all else it is a gift, and it will guide you if you are brave enough to follow. Intuition will show you whether your decision was right or not, and will allow you to consider new and more authentic choices in the future. You can use this reflective practice to revisit events from your list or to help you consider options surrounding current decisions in life. Like all skills, the more you practice the more skilful you become. Eventually, the choices and decisions made will be guided by an intuitive sense rather than by a conditioned reaction. Overcoming Fear of Failure

You gain strength, courage, and confidence by every experience in which you really stop to look fear in the face. You must do the thing, which you think you cannot do. (Eleanor Roosevelt in Goodwin, 2013) Nobody likes to fail, and to fail consistently without understanding why would certainly lead to despondency. It is not just the fact that we have not succeeded that dents our confidence, but the shame attached to

­Authenticity and its Impact upon Confidence and Self‐Estee

failure, this is what produces fear and ultimately avoidance, if we do not try then we cannot fail (McGregor, & Elliot, 2005). We have explored the positive and negative influences of others when making decisions, yet those influences can also extend to producing fear and evasion. No matter how enthusiastic you are about a direction in life, others will tell you it is impossible and try to discourage any attempt if they cannot imagine themselves accomplishing the goal, thereby sabotaging your motivation and belief by the transference of their fear of failure. When we set new goals that are authentic to us they can seem over‐ambitious and out of reach to other people. It is wise to hold them internally or to choose c­arefully those in whom we confide. Whenever something new is approached there is always an element of fear, fear of the unknown. Yet fear is simply an emotion arising and passing, triggered by thoughts that are often based on prediction rather than on reality. If we can observe, accept, and acknowledge, then fear will pass. If we are to truly follow an authentic path, to learn and grow, and live to our potential, then failure is, on occasions, going to be an inevitable outcome. We can, however, shift the perception of failure to an opportunity to learn, thereby observing failure as a stepping stone to s­uccess, rather than as the final result. Looking at what has been gained, learned, and observed in situations that do not produce the desired result is a course of action that builds confidence and self‐ esteem. If it is approached with self‐compassion, it becomes the action of a wise mind. Reflective Practice: The Emotion of Fear

To use fear as an ally rather than something that is incapacitating we need to get to know the feeling, to shift from something we avoid to something we embrace as a teacher. We can do this through meditation practice and using our imagination to recall situations that create avoidance. It is recommended that events we embrace and regard as pleasant be used as a counterbalance to end the practice. If at any time the practice becomes difficult or overwhelming, simply open the eyes and focus on the breath as you bring the practice to a close. As with all reflective practices, we begin by paying attention to posture, whether that is sitting, lying, or standing, and noticing sensations that are created by the chosen position. Then shifting attention to the breath, observing the sensations associated with breathing in and breathing out. Allow sufficient time for the body and mind to settle into stillness. Letting the breath drift into the background, bring a situation to mind that creates an element of fear and avoidance. There are many such situations in life, some we avoid completely and others with which we engage,

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and struggle through the feelings of dread and anxiety. Now, holding the image in the mind, enquire into the origin of the fear, getting to know the feeling, and noticing the thoughts, physical sensations, and emotions that are associated with this feeling. If this proves to be difficult, then the option of just touching in on the sensation is available. Using the breath as an anchor to the present moment, attention can then be shifted between sensations created by the visualization and the sanctuary of the breath. Using this technique the feeling of fear can be known, alongside the physical sensations, thoughts, and emotions that arise simultaneously. The emphasis is very much around familiarity, as suggested by Eleanor Roosevelt (2012), we can gain strength, courage, and confidence by stopping to look fear in the face. At the end of the practice, shift attention and visualize a situation that has resulted in a positive experience, notice how this experience feels, perhaps exploring how it feels in both body and mind to be confident of the outcome.

­Summary Our ability to approach life in an authentic manner is subject to influence from early childhood onwards. This can lead to accepting information automatically and becoming locked into habitual thinking, which can result in decision‐making that is based on conditioning rather than on authenticity. This can undermine confidence and self‐esteem, and can produce an instinctive feeling that life is off track. It is perhaps only from following a direction in life that has been intuitively chosen that true confidence emerges. If we are determined and persistent in our pursuit of an authentic life we can learn to let go of self‐esteem driven by social c­omparison and cultivate self‐compassion. We can learn from the inevitable failures and use this wisdom as a guide to future success, we become resilient. Through the practice of mindfulness and the cultivation of present‐moment attention clarity can arise alongside a more intuitive intelligence. We become confident in our ability, less reliant on the influence of others, and less reactive to the onset of fear.

­References Banks, C., & Moyne, J. (2009). Rumi: The book of love: Poems of ecstasy and longing. New York: HarperCollins. Birnie, K., Speca, M., & Carlson, L. E. (2010). Exploring self‐compassion and empathy in the context of mindfulness‐based stress reduction (MBSR). Stress and Health, 26(5), 359–371.

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Bishop, S. R., Lau, M., Shapiro, S., Carlson, L., Anderson, N. D., Carmody, J., Segal, Z. V. Devins, G. (2004). Mindfulness: A proposed operational definition. Clinical Psychology Science and Practice, 11(3), 230–241. Breines, J. G., & Chen, S. (2012). Self‐compassion increases self‐ improvement motivation. Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin, 38(9), 1133–1143. Goodwin, D. K. (2013). No ordinary time: Franklin & Eleanor Roosevelt: The home front in World War II. New York: Simon & Schuster. Langer, E. J. (1989). Mindfulness. Boston, MA: Da Capo Press. Leary, M. R., Tate, E. B., Adams, C. E., Batts, A. A., & Hancock, J. (2007). Self‐ compassion and reactions to unpleasant self‐relevant events: The implications of treating ourselves kindly. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 92(5), 887–904. Marchand, W. R. (2013). Mindfulness meditation practices as adjunctive treatments for psychiatric disorders. Psychiatric Clinics of North America, 36(1), 141–152. McGregor, H. A., & Elliot, A. J. (2005). The shame of failure: Examining the link between fear of failure and shame. Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin, 31(2), 218–231. Neff, K. D. (2003). Self‐compassion: An alternative conceptualization of a healthy attitude towards oneself. Self and Identity, 2, 85–102. Neff, K. D., Hsieh, Y. P., & Dejitterat, K. (2005). Self‐compassion, achievement goals, and coping with academic failure. Self and Identity, 4(3), 263–287. Roosevelt, E. (2012). You learn by living: Eleven keys for a more fulfilling life (50th Anniversary ed.). New York: Harper Perennial.

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Stephen I discovered mindfulness three years ago. At the time I was struggling with bowel cancer and the side effects of treatment. My job was in the care sector, working with adults with learning disabilities, and my wife and I were caring for her mother, who had been diagnosed with vascular dementia, so you could say we had one or two things on our minds. Unfortunately, I developed depression and anxiety around this time. I looked to counselling, medication, and the great support of my wife; all three played a part in my recovery, although it was mindfulness that triggered something powerful within. Practising the body scan in the first week of the programme numerous thoughts entered my mind, but I g­ently let them go and concentrated on my breathing, it was then that even though my eyes were closed I began to see a wonderful array of colours in my mind. It lasted about 20 minutes and when I was prompted to end the meditation, I did not want to. I became aware of a sense of happiness and calmness that I had not felt for a long time. Over the years I have practised various types of mindfulness meditation: sitting, lying, and walking. I have not, however, e­xperienced colours again no matter how hard I try, but then again I am still learning and realize it was simply an experience. Mindfulness has changed my life.

Living Mindfully: Discovering Authenticity through Mindfulness Coaching, First Edition. Gary Heads. © 2017 John Wiley & Sons, Ltd. Published 2017 by John Wiley & Sons, Ltd.

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­Week 2 It is not the strongest of the species that survives, nor the most intelligent that survives. It is the one that is most adaptable to change. (Charles Darwin) It is in childhood or in periods of our life we consider to be important that the foundations of our belief systems are built, and as we develop into adults those beliefs can create experiences in order to match those beliefs. Over time we develop core beliefs; they are the view we have of ourselves, of others, and the world in general. Our beliefs can be inflexible, and provide the lens through which we interpret our experiences. It is important to acknowledge that some beliefs are potentially helpful, however, many are the opposite, and can undermine personal development and our ability to progress in life. Many negative core beliefs arise only when we are faced with certain situations, usually a situation that requires a desired outcome. The arising of anxiety or lack of confidence may well trigger the core negative belief. At the time the belief may make complete sense, certainly in relation to the experience currently on our radar. Yet the accuracy of the interpretation can be wildly exaggerated. The rigidity of a negative core belief is in direct contrast to a helpful positive belief where a degree of flexibility is present, an openness to information, and a more accepting stance when the current belief is contradicted. The core beliefs we inherit from life experiences produce the guidelines used to navigate through daily life. It stands to reason that if those beliefs are founded on conditioning, habit, and negativity, then the choices and actions we choose may not prove to be authentic or wise.

Living Mindfully: Discovering Authenticity through Mindfulness Coaching, First Edition. Gary Heads. © 2017 John Wiley & Sons, Ltd. Published 2017 by John Wiley & Sons, Ltd.

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However, having embedded negative core beliefs does not mean that we have to simply live with them or allow them to dictate proceedings. As science evolves evidence is emerging that the brain is malleable, and continually adapting and changing in response to our lifestyle, physiology, and environment. This concept is referred to as neuroplasticity (Draganski, Gaser, Busch, Schuierer, Bogdahn, & May, 2004); the rationale being that the brain is constantly reforming, rather than the original theory that the brain was in fact immobile except for periods of critical development. If the brain has the ability as suggested to reorganize pathways and create new connections, then we can literally rewire our brain to replace negative beliefs with more positive and helpful alternatives. The first objective, however, is to become proficient in identifying those beliefs that undermine any progress we seek to make. It is here that the practice of mindfulness can be helpful. Learning to observe our thoughts, feelings, emotions, and physical sensations in meditation can provide the gateway to stepping back from negative beliefs and emotions, and seeing clearly that they are merely mental phenomena to be explored rather than taken as facts. The ability to observe one’s thoughts and feelings as transitory events in the mind is referred to as decentring (Sauer & Baer, 2010). This would also include the realization that thoughts and feelings do not necessarily reflect reality, truth, or self‐worth, and that they may not be important or require any particular behaviour in response (Fresco, Moore, van Dulmen, Segal, Ma, Teasdale, & Williams, 2007). Instead, there is the cultivation of a more present‐focused, non‐judgemental, and accepting attitude.

­Exercise: Observe – Identify – Write Down – Explore Alternatives To change a limiting belief we must first be aware of its existence and the nature of the situations in which its impact is felt. Often a negative thought can trigger anxiety and panic. Automatically the belief can arise that we are unable to fulfil the goal or make the right decision. This process can unfold habitually without questioning the validity of the thought in relation to the experience. It is through developing self‐awareness that we can identify those negative beliefs that are based on past experiences or uniformed predictions about the future, and begin to question just how much truth they actually hold. We can examine the evidence and analyse the situation, determining what we may be bringing to our present c­ircumstances that may be purely assumption rather than facts. Reflective Practise

Beginning this practice by finding a comfortable place, hopefully where there will be minimal disturbance, and choosing a posture that feels

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appropriate. This can be seated or lying down. The visualization element of this practice will be an event or situation where negative thoughts have arisen that have contributed to a lack of confidence, giving up, an inability to make a decision, not following through, or imagining a worse‐case scenario. In other words, a situation where a negative belief has overpowered logic and reason to produce a reaction that has created doubt and fear. Initially, it can be helpful to compile a written list of negative beliefs and the situations associated with each belief. There will usually be some that arise often; one such event can then be recalled during the practice. Beginning now to focus on all the sensations created by the posture adopted, bring the attention to wherever there is contact with the body and grounding oneself in the present moment. After a while, shift the attention to the arising and passing of the breath, being fully with each in‐breath and each out‐breath. Allow sufficient time to drop into the rhythm of the breath and, whenever it is noticed, returning the drifting mind to the practice in a non‐judgemental and accepting way. When the time feels right, bring to mind the event and visualize the scenario playing out. Notice thoughts, emotions, feelings, and any physical sensations that may be arising as the event is imagined. Then, choosing to stop, observing and noticing any negative thoughts. Bringing a sense of curiosity to the e­xploration and questioning the belief, is it the truth? Once the negative belief has been recognized a new positive version can be introduced. By replaying the positive belief we can reinforce and embed this alternative. Newly generated positive thoughts and the accompanying emotions will need consistent practice, and will be resisted by old embedded patterns of thinking. However, the crucial element to progress is awareness, so as soon as old negative beliefs arise introduce the alternative positive version. Rehearsing positive changes through meditation practice helps to r­einforce those changes. It can create new patterns of thinking that arise naturally when situations present themselves in daily life. The Influence of Negative Emotions

Research intimates that establishing a personal mindfulness practice can help to reduce the symptoms of stress, anxiety, and depression by modifying our emotion regulation abilities (Chambers, Gullone, & Allen, 2009). There is indeed evidence that sustaining a long‐term mindfulness practice may influence attentional deployment, specifically the ability to exert cognitive control of negative rumination (Ramel, Goldin, Carmona, & McQuaid,2004). Engaging in such training may therefore result in the creation of improvements to the ability to disengage from aversive e­motional stimuli (Lutz, Slagter, Dunne, & Davidson, 2008).

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When we are looking to move beyond core negative beliefs, it can be the negative emotions that arise alongside thoughts that can create the biggest challenge to making progress. Perhaps in terms of advancing towards a more authentic lifestyle, it is social anxiety that can be instrumental in keeping us locked in our present circumstances. A common factor when suffering from anxiety, stress, and depression is social isolation; therefore, re‐engaging with society can be a major step. That intense fear of being evaluated in social or performance situations can be overwhelming. We can so easily focus all our attention on negative thoughts and self‐imagery, becoming over critical, and thinking other people are assuming the worst about us. All of this can lead to avoidance, which in turn creates social isolation. It is a familiar pattern for many and is often shared in groups engaged in the TIME Programme. The courage is found to move out of isolation only to be driven back by anxiety. The following quote by Thich Nhat Hanh points to the source of what can make us suffer from anxiety: Anxiety, the illness of our time, comes primarily from our inability to dwell in the present moment. (Thich Nhat Hanh, 1999) The words may be simple, but the message is profound. It is in the present moment that our true reality exists, not in the past or the future, but right now. If we pay attention to the present moment we may find that the majority of our moments are not filled with anxiety, but are relatively still. It is the journey into the rapids of mood, memory, and apprehension about the future that can taint each moment with foreboding.

­ xercise: Body and Breath – Grounding E Ourselves in the Present Moment This practice can be used in situations that are giving rise to stress and anxiety, as preparation for a forthcoming event that is causing concern, or simply as part of a daily mindfulness practice. The following instructions are for a coping meditation that can be used whenever the need arises, and a longer version for preparation or practice. Coping Meditation

Depending upon the circumstances, this practice can be completed in a sitting or standing posture, with the eyes open. The natural reaction to feeling anxious or stressed can be to fight it, to somehow get rid of

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the feelings, usually this is a confrontation that results only in creating feelings of panic. Nature has provided the instinctive ‘fight or flight’ response to external threats, however, when our physiology is out of balance this response can be triggered often and for the wrong reasons. Anxiety and feelings of panic do not always arrive linked to a stressful event, they can be random and arrive without warning. As the focus of attention is the body and breath, this practice is accessible wherever we happen to be, we just need to remember to practice it. The first stage of this practice is to basically do the opposite of fight or flight and to embrace just how you are feeling in this moment. Allowing a few moments to be with the thoughts, feelings, emotions, and physical sensations that are arising. A silent mantra can also be used, such as ‘how am I feeling right now?’, followed by ‘it’s ok to feel this way’. The attitude we bring to this gentle exploration is a mix of compassion and curiosity, an accepting investigation. Then, shifting attention and resting it gently on the next breath, being fully with each in‐breath and each out‐breath. When the mind drifts into a­nxious or negative thoughts bringing it back to the breath whenever you become aware that the focus of attention has shifted. Now, expand the breath as if the whole body is breathing. Taking the breath throughout the body, from head to toe, and out to the edges of the skin, so that the body is being bathed with breath. Finally, expanding again, this time to include all the senses, sound, taste, touch, seeing, being fully present with the current environment. Pay s­p ecial attention to feeling the feet on the floor. Perhaps using the silent mantra, ‘this is where I am right now, in this moment, and I am fine’. Body and Breath Meditation: Transcript

Find a comfortable seated position. Notice your presence, in this space, in this moment. Become aware of temperature, sounds, and see the f­eatures, colours, tones and textures around you. Settle into stillness, settling into being here now. Allow the eyes to close or, alternatively, lower the gaze if that is preferable. Gently guide the attention towards the body and posture, feeling and exploring the direct experience of being here, rather than thinking about being here. Bring awareness to the sense of touch, and the connection of the lower part of the body with the support, noticing the posture of the upper body. Sitting tall, alert, with a sense of ease. Allow the weight to be gently positioned on the sitting bones, then spreading the weight evenly to other areas of contact.

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Encourage a lift through the spine and the front of the body, and let the shoulders ease down a little. Draw the chin in slightly and then, if possible, soften the jaw, eyes, and forehead, and explore the feeling of being supported. Perhaps experiment with lifting the body on an in‐breath and releasing on an out‐breath, noticing the sense of touch at the legs, clothing, or from air on the skin. Noticing any physical sensations within the body, such as tingling, numbness, discomfort, or perhaps a sense of stillness and space. Whatever the experience, be fully with it, if that is possible. Having an open presence, being interested and kind. Gently guide attention around the body, from the soles of the feet to the crown of the head, being with the body as a connection to the present moment, a focus point you can return to at any point in this practice. If you become aware of any areas of pain, tension, or tightness in the body, then exploring what feels best, remaining present, focused, and bringing softness and opening to the experience with each breath. Softening on the in‐breath, opening on the out‐breath. Alternatively, choosing to guide the attention to the breath as an alternate point of focus. Sitting in stillness, resting awareness lightly on the physical presence, in this space, in this moment. Now, gathering attention once more, this time becoming aware of your breathing. Becoming interested in the feel of the breath in the body. Perhaps taking a few deep breaths, allowing the sound and depth of the breath to guide attention here. Feeling the vibrations the breath makes as it travels through the throat. Then, letting the breath find its natural rhythm and tone, and being with the cycle of each breath, the complete in‐breath and the complete out‐breath, including an awareness of any spaces between breaths. Perhaps feeling the gentle movement of the body with the breath, the rise and fall, expansion, and release as you breathe‐in and breathe‐out. Flowing with the rhythm of each new breath, and becoming interested in when the in‐breath begins, how it moves, pauses, and turns around on the out‐breath; where the out‐breath begins, flows, and turns to the in‐breath. It may help to focus attention in the area where the breath is most prominent in the body, perhaps in the abdomen, chest, mouth, or nose. If you are unsure, then choosing to focus on the breath in the abdomen. Connecting with the sensations here, a place to focus attention, to connect with the present moment. When the attention drifts to distraction, guide it gently back to the body and the breath. Investigate the quality and nature of each breath, its movement, rhythm, length, depth, and tone. Now, reconnecting with the wider sense of presence in this space, becoming aware of the points of contact with the support. Listening to emerging sounds, noticing temperature, and in the mind’s eye visualizing the space you are in, experiencing just sitting here.

Acceptance: Working with Negative Beliefs and Emotions

Transference: Catching an Emotional Cold

In life it is inevitable that we will have family members and a circle of friends and acquaintances that influence our mood both positively and negatively. In these interactions we may be aware of the other person’s emotional reactions by paying attention to their facial expressions, gestures, the tone of their voice, and how they are communicating with us. We can usually ascertain the mood from these cues. What we may or may not be aware of is our own emotional reaction to the conversation, and just how much this emotional transference is influencing our behaviour and belief system. This process is referred to as ‘emotional contagion’ (Hatfield, Cacioppo, & Rapson, 1994), that is, when a person or a group influences the emotions and affective behaviour of another person or group through the conscious or unconscious induction of emotions. Although emotional contagion works both positively and negatively, for the sake of argument we will start with the negative implications of this process. Research has uncovered some interesting results when exploring depression within the family context. Those findings include depression in a spouse frequently leading to depression in the other partner, and children brought up by depressed parents being significantly more likely to have a depressive episode (Morris, Silk, Steinberg, Myers, & Robinson, 2007). There may well be a strong case to include anxiety and stress in this discussion as both can have a similar effect. It is certainly interesting to note family history when I complete pre‐programme orientations; it is often the case that most members of a family are suffering from a variety of mental health issues. However, it is not just in family relationships that emotional contagion impacts; one person steeped in negativity can undermine an organization, destroy a positive group dynamic, or dilute team spirit. In conclusion, being subjected to negative emotions can not only impact on health and well‐being, but also put a dent in aspirations and goals. The best‐laid plans can be shattered by a negative comment if confidence levels are fragile. Fortunately, emotional contagion also functions in a positive manner when communicating with upbeat, motivated, and enthusiastic people. In other words, if you interact with happy, encouraging people, you tend to take on board those attitudes. The effects of this emotional transference have far‐reaching consequences, take for instance social media. In a recent research study emotional contagion was examined by looking at Facebook status updates (Kramer, 2012). It was discovered that after a user makes a status update with emotional content their friends are significantly more likely to post based on attachment or aversion to the content. The effect is still significant after three days, indicating that emotional contagion is conceivable via text‐only communication and

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that emotions can transfer through social networks. This poses the q­ uestion that if emotion spreads through indirect communications media, what impact does the constant barrage of negative news on television have on our emotions and moods? It is not that we have to avoid contact with all people that transmit negative emotions, or stop watching television, or surfing the Internet. The skill necessary to look after ourselves in these situations is self‐ awareness, tuning in to how the person or the media is making us feel. We can then choose to disengage from the interaction, or to use the body and breath to ground us in the present moment. Tuning into the emotions of others is essential to living in harmony in a complex and demanding world. However, due to our in‐built fight or flight mode, we tend to be ever vigilant to potential threats. Someone displaying negative emotions could even be perceived as a threat, making us susceptible to taking that negativity on board. In daily life there will be people and situations that are unavoidable, and in such situations we can apply mindfulness to guide us in regulating emotions and help us to remain present focused. In many other interactions and circumstances we do indeed have a choice. The first step is to recognize the instances when negativity floods in and affects emotion, mood, and thought. Having identified these moments, we can then take wise action. This will take practice, as day‐to‐day routine can be very automated and habitual. The following exercise is a useful guide to exploring emotions and their potential impact.

­Exercise: Creating Positive Emotions The suggestion here is to begin a reflective journal to record negative and positive thoughts and emotions, alongside the associated actions or conversations that trigger them each day. The recommended timescale is two weeks. It is essential to approach this in a non‐judgemental way; it is an investigation rather than a critical assessment, and is to be conducted with curiosity and gentle exploration. Obviously, we cannot record every interaction, but there will be some that have a noticeable impact. There may be an opportunity to make notes shortly after the event or it may be reflected upon at the end of each day. After two weeks whatever has been recorded can be explored, and the appropriate choices made. The idea is that, wherever possible, more time is spent with people that emanate positivity and encouragement, and less time with those that only succeed in enhancing negativity and reducing motivation levels. In  situations that are unavoidable, such as communication with family members and work colleagues, there is the option of introducing the

Acceptance: Working with Negative Beliefs and Emotions

coping mediation and limiting the time spent interacting with the person involved. Many of the actions we perform on a daily basis are very much in our control and open to choice. Depending upon how they make us feel we can choose to engage or not. With a little investigation and care the ratio can be balanced in favour of positivity. Working with the emotions journal can be an ongoing process. Listed below are examples of actions and situations that participants have compiled during the TIME Programme, and the alternative action they have decided upon. Kate: I automatically turn the radio on in the car on my way to work; I  noticed that the constant news updates and travel bulletins actually make me anxious. By the time I arrive I am far from relaxed. I have started travelling in silence or choosing music that I enjoy, I have to say my frame of mind has improved. Martin: My first port of call in the morning is watching the news whilst eating my breakfast. Much to my surprise I observed myself getting angry, frustrated, and creating tension in the body. I have explored this as part of the emotions exercise and realize that the constant negative news creates a sense of hopelessness; it’s all out of my control. I decided to eat my breakfast in silence; however, in the beginning this produced anxiety, what was I missing? Eventually this settled down, and my new routine is generating a much calmer beginning to my day. Elaine: At work due to my heavy workload I tend to eat my lunch at my desk, even though we have a beautiful space within the building reserved for this purpose, in fact it is always empty. I have realized that this makes my mood drop, and affects me physically, and to save time I buy unhealthy food. On a positive note, I have re‐discovered my love of reading, and have started introducing this into my day. I decided to experiment with stopping for lunch, and taking my book to the lunch area initially twice a week. Although I found this very challenging at first, especially sitting on my own, I persevered. I have to say this has now transformed my day on so many levels. It’s something to look forward to each day. I enjoy reading my book, which creates calm and I think about what to buy for my lunch that is good for me. Interestingly I am not the only person now using the space. Mandy: I found exploring the impact of communication on my thoughts and emotions fascinating, but also difficult, mainly due to the realization of just how much it affects my decision‐making. Much to my surprise, I seem to seek reassurance when deciding on what action to take, I collect opinions from others. I have a collection of family members and friends that I seem to use for this purpose, some helpful, some not. My circle of support includes some that encourage me to do what I feel is right, whilst others urge me to be careful, all this results in is confusion and a battle of

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emotions. I am endeavouring to take a more intuitive approach, making decisions on how I feel, rather than basing decisions on the opinions of others. This seems a positive step forward, and any mistakes will at least be my mistakes. William: I work in sales and am under constant pressure to hit targets, in fact the whole sales team is constantly on edge because of such high expectations. Bringing awareness to communication both with my colleagues and customers has shown me just how negative we are collectively, and how this transfers to my customers. When I arrive home I am always exhausted, anxious, and stressed, and don’t look forward to work. Through working with this exercise I have become aware of the fact that a large percentage of my working day is spent discussing the negative aspects of the job, added to this every time a customer leaves without a sale I take it personally. Even on breaks and lunch the topic of conversation is unchanged. The action I have taken is quite drastic; I am changing my job, in the meantime I go out for lunch, and change the subject whenever I can. The real insight here was my tendency to start conversations negatively; there are many positive aspects to my life that had become submerged by one issue. Darren: I have been unemployed for over 18 months and was starting to believe that looking for a job is a hopeless task. Through observing my interactions with others I have noticed my lack of enthusiasm, motivation, and overall negative demeanour when communicating. I have been happy to apply for any employment, but my real passion is gardening and I have noticed that my attitude is more positive when discussing the possibility of working in this area. We are being encouraged in this programme to be authentic and follow what we are passionate about, it is obvious to me now that I have been ignoring this, perhaps not believing I can actually do it. Seeing the impact on my thoughts and emotions has resulted in a more focused approach to finding employment, including the possibility of self‐employment. I am not there yet, but feel more positive about the future. We can see from the comments above how easily we can become locked into negative beliefs, and just how automatic this process can be. Yet with awareness and investigation these habitual patterns can be unlocked and replaced with positive alternatives. It has been said many times by many wise individuals that the answers to our questions lie within us, not in the past, or the future, but in the moment. What lies behind us and what lies before us are tiny matters c­ompared to what lies within us. (Henry S. Haskins, 1940)

Acceptance: Working with Negative Beliefs and Emotions

­Summary The influence of negative beliefs and their accompanying emotions can distort experiences and the view we have of life. They can hinder any progress we wish to make by instilling doubt and fear. Of course, not all beliefs are incapacitating, therefore positive beliefs should be promoted and practiced. Through mindfulness we can become aware of the p­atterns of thinking that limit our potential and learn to explore healthy options. It is our meditation practice that can open the window of discovery, and change the way we approach daily life. The spectre of negativity can a­utomatically arise in familiar situations, or new challenges. However, with practice and gentle exploration we can find new and positive alternatives.

­References Chambers, R., Gullone, E., & Allen, N. B. (2009). Mindful emotion regulation: An integrative review. Clinical Psychology Review, 29(6), 560–572. Draganski, B., Gaser, C., Busch, V., Schuierer, G., Bogdahn, U., & May, A. (2004). Neuroplasticity: Changes in grey matter induced by training. Nature, 427(6972), 311–312. Fresco, D. M., Moore, M. T., van Dulmen, M. H., Segal, Z. V., Ma, S. H., Teasdale, J. D., & Williams, J. M. G. (2007). Initial psychometric properties of the experiences questionnaire: Validation of a self‐report measure of decentering. Behavior Therapy, 38(3), 234–246. Haskins, S. H. (1940). Meditations in Wall Street. New York: William Morrow. Hatfield, E., Cacioppo, J. T., & Rapson, R. L. (1994). Emotional contagion. Cambridge: Cambridge University Press. Kramer, A. D. (2012). The spread of emotion via Facebook. In Proceedings of the SIGCHI Conference on Human Factors in Computing Systems (pp. 767–770). New York: ACM. Lutz, A., Slagter, H. A., Dunne, J. D., & Davidson, R. J. (2008). Attention regulation and monitoring in meditation. Trends in Cognitive Sciences, 12(4), 163. Morris, A. S., Silk, J. S., Steinberg, L., Myers, S. S., & Robinson, L. R. (2007). The role of the family context in the development of emotion regulation. Social Development, 16(2), 361–388. Ramel, W., Goldin, P. R., Carmona, P. E., & McQuaid, J. R. (2004). The effects of mindfulness meditation on cognitive processes and affect

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in patients with past depression. Cognitive Therapy and Research, 28(4), 433–455. Sauer, S., & Baer, R. A. (2010). Mindfulness and decentering as mechanisms of change in mindfulness‐ and acceptance‐based interventions. In R. Baer (Ed.), Assessing mindfulness and acceptance processes in clients: Illuminating the theory and practice of change (pp. 25–50) Oakland, CA: Context Press. Thich Nhat Hanh. (1999). The heart of Buddha’s teaching: Transforming suffering into peace, joy, and liberation. London: Rider.

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Melanie I started my mindfulness journey nearly four years ago due to post‐natal depression. Since then there have been countless moments when my practice pops into my life. I may find myself in a situation when I would have previously catastrophized the event, this would have led to an ­episode of anxiety, but now I notice the start of this path, and a more calm and logical moment occurs. It is so difficult to explain, but although I may not have completed ­formal practice my mindfulness just kicks in and I notice that happening. Now with my second child I notice how calm I feel, some anxiety does start to occur due to the tiredness, but now I notice that, and my ­mindfulness practice springs into action. This is a very different response compared to before the programme where my brain would have continued on a path of anxiety.

Living Mindfully: Discovering Authenticity through Mindfulness Coaching, First Edition. Gary Heads. © 2017 John Wiley & Sons, Ltd. Published 2017 by John Wiley & Sons, Ltd.

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14 ­Communication Releasing Our Words to the Universe

­Week 3 Your beliefs become your thoughts, your thoughts become your words, your words become your actions, your actions become your habits, your habits become your values, and your values become your destiny. (Gandhi) In my garden I have some Tibetan prayer flags; I have always loved the concept of the rain and the wind carrying the words into the universe. On any given day, the flags seem to mirror how human beings and their ability to communicate can sometimes be. If the weather is calm and sunny, the flags are still, silent. If there is a breeze, they flow freely, however, a storm will tangle them up and they struggle to be free. Add in the rain and snow and they can fray at the edges or freeze completely. Thinking about this reminded me of Gandhi’s words, when we speak are we not throwing our words into the universe? If as Gandhi suggests our destiny originates with our beliefs, then those beliefs, whether positive or negative, will have a monumental effect upon our ultimate destination in life. If indeed those beliefs lead to thoughts and eventually the spoken word. then those words that guide us in our actions should be chosen with great care and represent who we are. The importance of communicating with others in an open and honest way, and developing the ability to express thoughts, feelings, and ideas both positive and negative is the essence of authentic speech. The complexity, pervasiveness. and consequence of this basic human interaction can be overlooked due to it being one of those everyday activities that is completely entwined with all human life. However, every aspect of our daily lives is influenced by our ability to communicate with others (Littlejohn & Foss, 2007). Living Mindfully: Discovering Authenticity through Mindfulness Coaching, First Edition. Gary Heads. © 2017 John Wiley & Sons, Ltd. Published 2017 by John Wiley & Sons, Ltd.

Communication: Releasing Our Words to the Universe

The conditioned and habitual nature of speech can reveal itself in our daily conversations. Over the years we can develop words and phrases that we use regularly that are so automated that any awareness of an alternative response can be lost in a flurry of emotion and reactivity. This is especially evident when we feel threatened or unsure of ourselves. If a situation arises where the outcome is not to our liking or someone ­disagrees with our opinion, we can immediately turn to our stock phrases to support us through what we may deem to be a challenging situation. The words we speak are our defence mechanism, delivered from a place of fear; however, this spontaneous and uninformed use of language allows no room for reflection or space for consideration. The immediacy of the words can dismiss any awareness of potential choices around how we respond. When we add the behaviour types – aggressive, passive, manipulative, and assertive – that are associated with communication we begin to see the intricacy with which we weave the patterns of human interaction (Bach & Goldberg, 1974).

­Exercise: Just Listening For this exercise you will need to find someone who is willing to ­participate with you. Begin by sitting opposite each other and deciding who will engage in the exercise first. Close the eyes and take a few ­minutes to find a topic that you are happy to talk about for approximately five minutes. This needs to be a topic that is gentle in nature: a hobby, something funny that happened to you, or about your pet, for instance. Your partner will be able to contribute to this conversation only by using body language; it is also useful to maintain eye contact as best you can. When approximately five minutes has elapsed the roles can then be reversed. Many people find this exercise challenging, but also insightful. For someone not to interact during a conversation can seem strange at first, however, many participants find that the experience produces a feeling of being listened to at a deeper level. They can also run out of words to say, and feel a little uncomfortable with the periods of silence. In everyday conversations the sentences tend to overlap or be interrupted, or there is a need to compete with one another to get the words heard. When listening the mind can make judgements about what the other person is saying, or begin to plan what to say when they have finished speaking. Being unable to respond verbally creates the space that gives a sense of just how reactive speech can be, and how often the mind drifts away from the present moment, leaving us lost in thought rather than listening. The influences upon our use of language are far‐reaching; everything we take in from both auditory and visual perspectives will contribute in some way to how we express ourselves through speech. What we see as positive or

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negative life events will impact upon self‐esteem and confidence, and will also hold authority over how we interact in c­ onversation with other people. It is perhaps a logical conclusion that words spoken in haste and from an unconsidered and reactive standpoint may produce a certain element of misinterpretation and confusion. How often do we speak and then realize that what we said was not what we meant to say. We can find ourselves grasping at the words in a futile effort to take them back before they are heard. The velocity we bring to dialogue poses an interesting question. How much of what we say is truly ours? As we develop and grow into adults, learning to socialize and function in an ever‐changing society, we develop certain patterns around thought, interpretation, and speech that seem to work for us (Silsbee, 2004). If it gets us what we want, we stick with it and it becomes a habit; we become conditioned to interpreting situations and events in a particular way. Unfortunately, habits can become embedded over time. When information is processed in this way the potential for reconsideration and reinterpretation can be discarded. Over a period of time this habitual processing of information can become entrenched. Using a tried and tested method and continually failing to achieve the desired outcome can create a sense of hopelessness. This may then impact on confidence, self‐esteem, and overall mental health (Langer, 1989). You have only to observe the emergence of new words and catchphrases to become aware of the addictive nature of human speech. Television is an interesting example of how easily we can be conditioned to use certain words and phrases. Successful programmes and adverts often carry hook phrases that can integrate themselves into our daily conversations. Some of them have been around for decades and have long outlived their original source. If subjecting ourselves to this media bombardment produces associated language, then a period of exposure to material with a negative connotation may well produce language tainted with negativity. Or if we are particularly drawn to programmes of a violent nature our speech may take on this trait. We have only to look at the development of computer games and their reliance on violence to stay in the bestsellers list to see how addictive and conditioned we can become. Children and young adults are most susceptible to this form of entertainment, running the risk of merging a computer‐generated world with reality. With this tendency towards habitual and addictive use of language it is imperative that we make wise choices around what we watch, read, and with whom we spend our time. It is no coincidence that story lines in our most popular serialized TV programmes are littered with negative outcomes. In fact, it is almost impossible for a seed of positivity to exist in this environment. However, despite this constant flow of suffering on show, human beings are more likely to become upset because they have missed an episode than by the content of the programmes.

Communication: Releasing Our Words to the Universe

Today social media plays a large part in how daily communication is conducted; although this is regarded as the domain of the young, it is also an influential part of daily life for older adults. In its place, and used wisely, social media can be of benefit to its users, however, it also comes with several potential risks. Certainly, children and adolescents, due to their limited capacity for self‐regulation and susceptibility, are at higher risk of issues such as bullying, privacy concerns, Internet addiction, and sleep deprivation. Most risks can be categorized into either peer‐to‐peer, in appropriate content, lack of understanding of online privacy issues, and outside influences of third‐party advertising groups (O’Keeffe & Clarke‐Pearson, 2011). Researchers have even suggested a new phenomenon labelled ‘Facebook depression’, which has been defined as a depression evolving from spending excessive amounts of time on social media then beginning to exhibit classic symptoms of depression (Selfhout, Branje, Delsing, ter Bogt, & Meeus, 2009). However, on a more positive note there are within social media opportunities to develop a sense of community, creativity, ideas, connections, and social skills (Boyd, 2008). We can be engaged in social media or the Internet and still retain awareness of just how we are reacting to content. By tuning into thoughts, emotions, and physical sensations on a regular basis we can check in, take a breathing space, and gauge whether it is time for a break. This is wise reflection. The alternative is to get lost in a barrage of information with little awareness of how it is making us feel, the downside of which is the heightened risk of stress, anxiety, and depression. Sometimes in certain situations when we are stressed or unsure, our words can mirror that of an avalanche, suddenly triggered by an explosion of emotion. We seem to be covering everything in our path with uncontrollable momentum. There may be very little awareness of where the conversation is going and the effect it is having not only on ourselves, but also on the recipient of this cascading dialogue. If we happen to be the focus of this conversation, it can feel like we are being suppressed by the sheer weight and volume of the interaction. It is not just in c­ hallenging situations that our words seem to grow legs and run off in all directions. If we become passionate and excited about something new that has entered our lives we can also launch into automated and reactive speech. To address this lack of awareness in communication there are several techniques that can be introduced and practiced on a daily basis; with practice they can enable us to develop a more authentic and skilful approach to speech. The first practice is to pay attention to our own inner dialogue; often in conversations with participants they will openly share that their self‐ talk is so critical and judgemental that they would never talk to another human being in the same way. Listening to oneself is a powerful practice. If the

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attitudes of kindness and compassion can be introduced here, then this skill will not only improve well‐being, but will also begin the process of developing mindful communication. The second practice is to intentionally use silence as part of speech, leaving spaces for reflection before answering or beginning a conversation. Initially, you may notice how uncomfortable we can become when there is a pause, however, learning to use silence as part of communication helps to promote truthful and reasoned answers. Silence will naturally improve the ability to listen to others, if we are not lost in thought we will be more attentive to what is being said. Finally, we can choose to slow down speech, to converse clearly and concisely.

­Exercise: Using the Breath in Communication To bring authenticity to speech we need to create space, a reflective pause. By establishing just enough time to drop into the moment we can procure a sense of what it is we actually want to say, if anything. As ­suggested by the Dalai Lama, sometimes silence can be the best answer. This pause can be as simple as paying attention to one in‐breath and one out‐breath. At first, it may seem a little strange to practice in this way, it can feel as if you are taking a long time to engage in conversation. However, we are talking about seconds, it is only the rapidity of normal day‐to‐day speech that creates the illusion that this reflective pace is ­prohibitive. An interesting and perhaps less intense place to begin this practice can be with telephone conversations. You can use the initial ring of the telephone as a reminder to bring attention to the breath, and create a pause before answering the call. As you begin to interact in the ­conversation bring attention to listening. Notice if the mind is racing ahead with potential answers or judgements. If the mind is drawn into planning what to say next rather than listening, then the attentiveness we may have brought to the conversation will be diluted. This can lead to misinterpretation. There will be a natural pause in the conversation; almost a silent agreement between two people when one invites the other to reply. It can be challenging to simply listen without the need to make a point or verify an opinion. When listening, can we listen without agreeing or disagreeing, or liking or disliking? Allow time to set judgements aside and be mindful of the words that are being expressed. Depending upon who you are having the conversation with opportunities to express your opinion or share an answer may be sparse. Or, alternatively, there may be an abundance of space in which to jump in with an answer. Throughout this process when you sense the intention to speak, allow yourself to embrace the moment and create a pause. Then asking a s­ imple question, ‘it’s not what I think I should say, but what do I actually feel

Communication: Releasing Our Words to the Universe

I  should say?’ Perhaps then a fragment of authenticity is allowed to ­surface and released to the universe, born not from the conditioned mind, but from the heart. It may be that this will instil a degree of ­confidence to allow you to take this practice into all areas of communication. The absence of face‐to‐face contact can allow time for reflection without the tension and anxiety that eye contact and body language can instigate. Like all new skills, it is down to practice. The day will present endless opportunities to introduce a pause in conversations. Perhaps the best approach is that of a friendly, curious, and reflective nature, almost ­playful. At first it is just a case of trying it and seeing what happens. We are often guided in conversations by a person’s tone of voice; the rise and fall in volume can unmask hidden depths of emotion and fear, or reveal levels of excitement and motivation. Just as tonality may reveal current mental states, so may the arising of a prolonged period of silence. Taking into account the complex and fragile nature of human beings and the many methods we use to display how we feel during a conversation, it is interesting to consider how a letter, email, or text might be perceived when all we have to guide us are the words themselves. Certainly, emotions play a significant role in determining how we choose to ­ ­communicate with one another. For instance, do we on occasions choose email over a telephone conversation due to feeling intimidated or disliking the other person? Sometimes picking up the telephone and coming to decisions far outweighs the number of emails needed to reach the same conclusion. The volume of emails arriving within organizations has even resulted in staff having specific email training to eliminate misconstrued content and the costs associated with this issue (Burgess, Jackson, & Edwards, 2005), There is no defining line between verbal communication and the written word when it comes to care and consideration, just as there is no way of knowing what emotional impact those words are h ­ aving on the recipient. Our practice is to be mindful of thoughts, emotions, and physical sensations when composing correspondence and speech. Whatever the circumstances, they are the guides to a skilful response. Throughout history there have been letters composed by individuals that have required great care and compassion due to their extraordinary circumstances. Each word carefully crafted and perhaps discarded many times until the sentences flowed with kindness and authenticity. Captain Kuno, a Japanese suicide pilot, wrote one such letter to his children (Pineau, 2013): Even though you cannot see me, I will always be watching you. Obey your mother, and do not trouble her. When you grow up, follow a path you like and grow to be fine Japanese persons. Do not envy the father of others, since I will become a spirit and closely

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watch over you two. Both of you study hard and help out your mother with work. I cannot be your horse to ride, but you two be good friends. I am an energetic person who flew a large bomber and finished off all the enemy. Please be persons who rise above me and so avenge my death. From Father Another correspondence many people are familiar with is Captain Scott’s letter to his wife as he neared his final days (Scott & Jones, 2006): To my widow. Dearest darling. It is not easy to write because of the cold ‐70 degrees below zero and nothing but the shelter of our tent … We are in a very tight corner and I have doubts of pulling through. In our short lunch hours, I take advantage of a very small measure of warmth to write letters preparatory to a possible end. If anything happens to me, I should like you to know how much you have meant to me. I must write a little letter for the boy if time can be found, to be read when he grows up. Dearest that you know I cherish no sentimental ­rubbish about remarriage. When the right man comes to help you in life, you ought to be your happy self again. Make the boy interested in natural history if you can. It is better than games. Try to make him believe in a God; it is comforting. Although not his final words Neil Armstrong’s letter is steeped in integrity and appreciation (Hansen, 2012): In my work, I depended on many people. In space flight whether it be a fellow crewman or a flight controller in mission control on earth, I often trusted that person with my life. When you depend on others, you want to be able to trust them. You want to be able to know that they say what they mean and mean what they say. And they will want to feel the same about you. Your word should always be beyond question. It is perhaps beyond doubt that the above three letters and countless ­ thers in the past were written with meticulous attention to the content o and the potential impact upon the recipient. There is a minimal risk of misinterpretation. Unlike face‐to‐face communication we can always discard the letter and start again. With the rapid rise of technology the reflective space that letter writing affords has diminished greatly. In 1971, Ray Tomlinson, a computer

Communication: Releasing Our Words to the Universe

engineer, hit the send button on the very first email; ironically, it did not actually contain any words. Fast forward to the present day and we find most of our written communication is via email or text. According to research published in the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology (Hall, Park, Song, & Cody, 2010), we have only a 50–50 chance of ascertaining the tone of any email, although we think we get it right 90% of the time. We should therefore, as suggested earlier, afford the same care and a­ ttention to emails and texts as we do to the spoken word. Create a pause, breath in and out and reflect ‘is this what I feel I should say?’ Take a little time to re‐ read the words before pressing send, and perhaps resisting the temptation to add a smiley or sad face and let the words express the intention. The advent of technology now provides almost instant communication around the world. It does, however, seem to have led to a tidal wave of impatience. You have only to take a bus or train journey to witness this self‐induced state of intolerance and anxiety. The journey can be punctuated by a flurry of emails and texts. A cacophony of ringtones fill the air, some answered eagerly as soon as they arrive, whilst those still waiting for a reply check and re‐check their phones constantly. Even when answering emails and texts speed is of the essence, we now have chat acronyms and text shorthand to accelerate the process. However, with all this haste and instantaneous riposte comes the price of misinterpretation. How ironic to carefully craft an email sharing words that are heartfelt and sensitive, to then receive a reply signed with ‘LOL’: lots of love or laughs out loud? The words we speak can be packed with emotion and automaticity, and this is no more evident than in the manipulative and drama‐seeking world of the media, especially the news. Daily newspapers have always fought each other for the eye‐catching headline that will drive up sales. Now with so many news channels we have become accustomed to the ‘breaking news’ banner that appears at the bottom of our screens. How many times have you seen a headline that with further scrutiny turns out to be of very little value, a misleading play of words? Our minds are naturally drawn to the dramatic or the fear of missing something important. If something major happens in the world we can be riveted to the TV, even if all that is happening is the constant repetition of the same update. The nature of the news content over the years has conditioned us to expect the worst, it seems to be driven by fear, and we have even lost the obligatory feel‐good story that was thrown to us at the end of the news bulletin. Upon investigation you will notice that the news that warranted a ‘breaking news banner’ that had us spending every minute glued to the screen has now be replaced by something deemed more important. The people injured in the war zone or earthquake are still suffering, but are now replaced by a celebrity’s fall from grace. Just like our constant

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bombardment from emails, texts, and the Internet, the media also allows us little time for reflection or the opportunity to pause. Using discretion when viewing television, especially news bulletins, is a wise response based on one’s awareness of arising thoughts and ­emotions that are being triggered. It is an important part of daily mindfulness practice, and should not be underestimated with regard to mental health. Television can be an experience full of learning, laughter, and rich entertainment, however, it can also be a source of fear, violence, craving, and hatred. In this time of global uncertainty, the reporting of disasters, both natural and man‐made, can have a profound effect upon our well‐being, especially as traumatic events tend to be broadcast twenty‐four hours per day. It is a natural part of our fight or flight mode to require constant information, it is part of the protective process. We are, ­however, now discovering that bombarding the senses with images of real‐life events leaves us susceptible to developing mental health issues. In one such study it was suggested that prolonged viewing of traumatic events increased the risk of developing post‐traumatic stress disorder significantly (Bernstein, Ahern, Tracy, Boscarino, Vlahov, & Galea, 2007). The greatest wisdom is seeing through appearance. (Atisha)

­Exercise: They Don’t Tell Us the Good News There is a poem by Thich Nhat Hanh that I often read to participants in this session of the programme; the opening lines are profound, and sum up beautifully the mindful approach to understanding our relationship to the media: They don’t publish the good news. The good news is published by us. We have a special edition every moment, and we need you to read it. The good news is that you are alive, and the linden tree is still there, standing firm in the harsh winter. The good news is that you have wonderful eyes to touch the blue sky. The good news is that your child is there before you, and your arms are available: hugging is possible. They only print what is wrong. Look at each of our special editions. We always offer the things that are not wrong. We want you to benefit from them and help protect them. The dandelion is there by the sidewalk, smiling its wondrous smile, singing the song of eternity.

Communication: Releasing Our Words to the Universe

Listen! You have ears that can hear it. Bow your head. Listen to it. Leave behind the world of sorrow and preoccupation and get free. The latest good news is that you can do it. (Thich Nhat Hanh, 1991) The verses above are telling us to look at the wonderful things that are happening in the world, and to use this as an antidote to the negative slant portrayed by the media. There is nothing wrong in keeping up to date with world affairs, but like all aspects of life we need balance. Look for positive news, stories of human compassion in action, explore this in your community, as well as worldwide. Remember what is reported in the news is a fraction of what is evolving on the planet. We can introduce a pause before turning on the television, radio, or mobile phone, and just checking in for a moment. Bringing awareness to the intention, perhaps this is an automatic action, a habit? There is always the option of limiting the time spent watching television, surfing the Internet, or using a mobile phone. Perhaps only watching the news at weekends. Whatever is decided upon, really explore how it feels when these different choices are made. For instance, if the choice is to go for a walk in nature instead of listening to the media, then take note of any thoughts, emotions, and physical sensations that arise from having made this decision. Communication is affected by everything we take in, and every action we choose to engage in. Would it not make sense to be aware of how this is impacting upon us psychologically and physically? The more care we take, the more skilful we can become in communicating with our fellow human beings.

­Summary The subject of communication is complex, and is subject to a host of influences. It can be extremely automated and emotionally driven. Yet through mindfulness practice we can develop awareness and insight that can potentially transform our speech to reflect the authentic self rather than a dialogue that conforms, or is based on, society’s version of reality. Everything we take in on a daily basis can affect the way we construct conversations as we interact with our fellow human beings. In order to promote authentic speech there needs to be a period of reflection that enables us to see clearly what we are bringing to the communication. This can be practised by slowing down and introducing a pause, a moment to connect with the breath, allowing silence to hold the potential for authenticity, and to really listen. It is not just communication with

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others, but also our inner dialogue that requires kind and compassionate attention, as critical and judgemental thinking can affect mood and ­overall mental health. Finally, we can extend awareness of our communication beyond the spoken word to email, text, and social media. Making a conscious decision that whenever we release our words to the universe they represent who we truly are.

­References Bach, G. R., & Goldberg, H. (1974). Creative aggression: The art of assertive living. New York: Wellness Institute. Bernstein, K. T., Ahern, J., Tracy, M., Boscarino, J. A., Vlahov, D., & Galea, S. (2007). Television watching and the risk of incident probable posttraumatic stress disorder: A prospective evaluation. Journal of Nervous and Mental Disease, 195(1), 41–47. Boyd, D. M. (2008). Taken out of context: American teen sociality in networked publics. Ann Arbor, MI: ProQuest. Burgess, A., Jackson, T., & Edwards, J. (2005). Email training significantly reduces email defects. International Journal of Information Management, 25(1), 71–83. Hall, J. A., Park, N., Song, H., & Cody, M. J. (2010). Strategic misrepresentation in online dating: The effects of gender, self‐ monitoring, and personality traits. Journal of Social and Personal Relationships, 27(1), 117–135. Hansen, J. R. (2012). First man: The life of Neil A. Armstrong. New York: Simon & Schuster. Langer, E. J. (1989). Mindfulness. Boston, MA: Da Capo Press. Littlejohn, S. W., & Foss, K. A. (2007). Theories of human communication. Andover: Cengage Learning. O’Keeffe, G. S., & Clarke‐Pearson, K. (2011). The impact of social media on children, adolescents, and families. Pediatrics, 127(4), 800–804. Pineau, R. (2013). The divine wind: Japan’s Kamikaze force in World War II. Annapolis, MD: Naval Institute Press. Selfhout, M. H., Branje, S. J., Delsing, M., ter Bogt, T. F., & Meeus, W. H. (2009). Different types of Internet use, depression, and social anxiety: The role of perceived friendship quality. Journal of Adolescence, 32(4), 819–833. Scott, R. F., & Jones, M. (2006). Journals: Captain Scott’s last expedition. Oxford: Oxford University Press. Silsbee, D. (2004). The mindful coach: Seven roles for facilitating leader development. Marshall, NC: Ivy River Press. Thich Nhat Hanh. (1991). Peace is every step: The path of mindfulness in everyday life. London: Bantam.

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Lynda In the autumn of 2015 I attended the Living Mindfully Programme. I had difficulties with my voice and as a professional voice user (teacher) this caused problems and added stress to an already stressful job. As I practised mindfulness every day I began to realize that I needed to make radical changes in my life. Although I totally enjoyed my job, I was finding it increasingly difficult because of my health, so I started to ­introduce mindfulness practice into my working day. I began to use the sitting meditation during lunchtime, and this ­enabled me to clear my thoughts and re‐energize ready for the afternoon session. One day when I was away from work on a training course I received a voice mail from my boss asking me to phone work immediately, instantly I began to envisage all sorts of problems. I had been using the breathing space practice recently so decided to complete the practice before ­returning the phone call. Afterwards I recognized that I had dealt with the return call completely different to normal. I was much more positive and assertive during the phone call and dealt with the issue calmly and succinctly. Since then I have left my job as a teacher and although it was initially a difficult decision to make, I know it was the right one for my health.

Living Mindfully: Discovering Authenticity through Mindfulness Coaching, First Edition. Gary Heads. © 2017 John Wiley & Sons, Ltd. Published 2017 by John Wiley & Sons, Ltd.

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15 ­Planning the Way Forward An Unfolding Journey

­Week 4 We keep moving forward, opening new doors, and doing new things, because we’re curious and curiosity keeps leading us down new paths. (Walt Disney) Having explored confidence, self‐esteem, negative beliefs, negative e­ motions, and communication in previous sessions, the opportunity arrives in the final week to begin planning an authentic way forward. Some participants may have already begun this process as ideas have emerged during the programme, others may be just investigating ­possibilities. In terms of detailing ideas and direction, the method chosen is left very much in the hands of the participant. Some choose to make notes, create a mind map (Mento, Martinelli, & Jones, 1999), or draw a picture of what their life will look like when all actions have been ­completed. The main focus of attention in this session is initially an authentic career pathway. For some, it will be a specific chosen goal or it may be a simple direction to explore, whilst others may be undecided. Throughout the weeks the emphasis has been on questioning conditioning, habitual patterns, beliefs, and negativity. The concept of authenticity has been promoted and explored as an antidote to automatically generated choices and decision making. It is now time to make ­authentic choices that are coherent with the past or with the envisioned future, it is not that the past is ignored, but rather used as a tool for learning, as a guide to the person we would like to become. That authentic person takes responsibility for choosing actions that represent their own ­internal values, potential, and self. In career choices they take the initiative and are responsible for their chosen vocation in life

Living Mindfully: Discovering Authenticity through Mindfulness Coaching, First Edition. Gary Heads. © 2017 John Wiley & Sons, Ltd. Published 2017 by John Wiley & Sons, Ltd.

Planning the Way Forward: An Unfolding Journey

(Svejenova, 2005). Although the word career has been used, the preferred description is ‘life purpose’ as it is a deeper reflective interpretation. It could be taken a step further and defined as how we chose to best offer our gift to the world. As Pablo Picasso describes in his famous quotation, ‘The meaning of life is to find your gift. The purpose of life is to give it away.’

­Exercise: Reflective Meditation The following exercise is an intuitive exploration of feelings and ­emotions that are linked to specific actions, and whether those actions are aligned to the individual’s overall authentic direction in life. It can be revealing and informative as positive feelings and emotions can be a guide to ­creating a passion‐driven objective rather than goals driven by need. The exercise is practised as a reflective meditation; we therefore begin with a period of stillness, silence, and grounding the body in the present moment. The preferred posture is seated on a hard‐backed chair, ­however, as always the posture can be adjusted to fit the individual’s needs. Begin by sensing any sensations of contact from the support, and allowing the body to rest in stillness. Then when the body feels settled, gently shift attention to the breath, focusing fully on each in‐breath and each out‐breath. Let the breath find its natural rhythm and allowing it to flow. Stay with the breath and each time the mind drifts away, which it inevitably will, gently guide it back to the breath and begin again. Work in this way for a period of at least 10 minutes. After the allotted time, let the breath drift into the background and intentionally drop into the mind the following question for reflection: What am I doing in my life when I feel truly at my best, and what am I doing when I feel I am merely existing? Simply notice what arises. Be aware of thoughts, feelings, emotions, and physical sensations as the question is repeated. At first, the answers may be automatic, well rehearsed, and predictable, however, as the ­ practice unfolds answers can surface that are meaningful, authentic, and directive. When the practice is complete allow sufficient time to make notes, engaging in this process in whatever way feels right, writing, drawing, or  adding the findings to a mind map. There may be additional ideas that spring to mind later in the session, and these can simply be added to the notes.

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The answer to ‘when do I truly feel at my best?’ is a guide to a more authentic and passion‐driven vocation, and can be explored in detail as to its potential with regard to employment options. Actions that produce a feeling of simply existing can be examined and either discarded or approached in a more mindful way if they are an integral part of daily life. At this stage a specific career path may have been identified or a direction that is a possibility may have emerged. The process of developing a strategy that will lead to the desired outcome is the next step. The following are actions that can enhance the goal‐setting process and help to maintain motivation and commitment; the journey may well be challenging, so persistence, positivity, and resilience will need to be cultivated. Beginning

It might sound obvious that to achieve any outcome you need to start, however, starting without first preparing the ground greatly reduces the possibility of a positive result. To give ourselves the best chance of ­achieving life‐changing goals we need first to commit to being completely truthful when analysing current circumstances. Identifying strengths is important, but it can be the acknowledgement of weaknesses and the resulting action to rectify this that can prove to be instrumental in achieving success. It is therefore prudent to explore any skills that will be needed, and to put in place attending training or workshops to address areas that require attention. Research

Regardless of the goal, a key ingredient towards completion is always a sound understanding of what is required, it is information that will plot the journey. Today it has never been easier to research a particular topic, the Internet has certainly revolutionized the gathering of data. However, there is a very powerful method that can be used to not only access information, but also listen to real‐life experiences relating to the chosen career path. If participants on the TIME Programme identified a career that felt right for them, then a conversation with an individual who was actively engaged in a similar role could be arranged; this was usually conducted by telephone. This proved to be an empowering and motivating experience; occasionally it resulted in a change of mind, which is a result in itself. The combination of research, experience, and intuition can lead to wise decisions. The influence of intuition in this process should not be

Planning the Way Forward: An Unfolding Journey

underestimated as a means of making fast and accurate decisions, speed being just one characteristic of intuition that makes intuitive judgements effective in decision making (Dane & Pratt, 2007). Plan of Action

After the initial period of exploring options and determining direction, a detailed plan will need to be compiled. This should include short and long‐term goals, support systems, and a timeline for completion. A major component of goal‐setting is feedback, therefore, beyond the mindfulness coach there needs to be additional support that can provide assistance and appropriate responses. This is imperative in order that individuals can effectively track their progress. The recipe for a successful outcome will need to include goals that are viewed as important, commitment, and self‐efficacy (Locke & Latham, (2006). There will inevitably be setbacks, instances when belief systems produce negativity, and doubts surface; it is in these moments that determination will be tested, and the positive and encouraging support of others will become essential. The following questions can be reflected upon when preparing a plan of action. What is truly important to me? What is my life purpose? What am I pretending not to know? What are my core values, and what do I represent? How would my success benefit others? What do I fear most in life? What can I be grateful for right now? What must I sacrifice to achieve my goals? What limiting beliefs am I still holding on to? Who can help me to achieve my goals? What does success look like to me? What skills do I need to learn? Any of the above questions can be explored using the reflective meditation exercise at the beginning of this chapter, insights from each question can then be added to the plan of action. Asking a Question during Meditation Practice

The technique of asking a question during meditation practice can be a doorway to creative thinking; from stillness and silence, the seeds of creativity have an opportunity to emerge. Holding arising and passing thoughts in awareness can not only demonstrate the predictability

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and habitual nature of the mind, but also create space for options, possibilities, and potential. Sitting in meditation can be a vehicle for receiving clues, ideas, inspiration, and direction, however, it is important to let things unfold naturally. If expectations are brought to the practice then frustration and disappointment may manifest. The practice can also be used as an aid to decision making. Creating a Sense of Balance

Although the focus has been predominantly about career choice, it is important to look at the bigger picture. The balance between work and life can be difficult to attain, however, overall happiness and satisfaction will impact on both work and home life. To achieve a work–life balance both personal and career goals will need to be identified and constantly re‐evaluated (Goodman, 2012), therefore, any personal plan should include all aspects of life. The main areas might include career, family, health, finances, environment, leisure, and spirituality, although every individual will have different priorities. Career and Work

When a career has been discovered that we feel passionate and ­enthusiastic about, it is so easy to become completely engrossed to the detriment of everything else in life. Basically, the working week becomes blurred, home becomes a second office, and the ability to switch off becomes difficult. This can be addressed by scheduling into a diary ­periods for personal activities and not taking work home. It requires discipline, but the alternative is potentially damaging to motivation ­ ­levels, health, and relationships. The two things that can help keep track of a spiralling workload are a diary and a personal journal. The method I use with regard to diary entries is simple but has proved to be effective. It requires an A4‐size diary and highlighter pens; meetings, training, etc. are entered, including travelling time; the time required to complete these tasks is then blanked out with a colour that represents work; ­anything else that is scheduled outside of work is marked with an alternative colour. This visual method shows us when work is creeping into other areas of life and shifting the equilibrium. As personal goals are identified actions can be entered and the balance can be restored. The journal should be used throughout the day to detail ideas, inspirational quotes, reflections, and plans. It is also important to include any thoughts, emotions, and physical sensations that arise, both negative and positive, and any associated actions, which can be reviewed at the end of the day. This method is not only useful as a creative tool, but also as a guide to which activities are uplifting and which are depleting.

Planning the Way Forward: An Unfolding Journey

Health

Well‐being holds our work–life balance delicately in its hand; without it, dreams and aspirations can be shattered, and every part of life will be affected. The recommendations made here are simply that, based on personal experience. There are a multitude of alternatives that can be explored before an individual strategy is compiled. The benefits of physical exercise have been subject to numerous research studies (Vina, Sanchis‐Gomar, Martinez‐Bello, & Gomez‐ Cabrera, 2012), and shown to be of great value to overall health. For those that suffer from depression the benefits are well documented (Craft & Perna, 2004). There can be an aversion to exercise; perhaps this is grounded in the media’s tendency to portray fitness as having a gym‐ based or running foundation. Yet the simplicity of movement can be overlooked. A gentle walk in nature, yoga, tai chi, or qi gong are all beneficial practices (Jahnke, Larkey, Rogers, Etnier, & Lin, 2010), it is a personal choice and once decided upon can be scheduled in the diary. The daily practice of mindfulness meditation is also recommended, with a suggested period of formal practice of 30 minutes. The evidence base for mindfulness and its potential benefits to well‐being are considerable (Fulwiler & de Torrijos, 2011). An unbalanced lifestyle can so often result in eating on the move, usually unhealthy food. The health risks attributed to junk food and snacks appears to be formidable; therefore, every effort should be made to maintain a healthy diet (WHO, 2009). Giving

The practice of giving and cultivating generosity can be found in the teachings of the Buddha; the virtue of generosity is advocated as an antidote to greed. Today, the general consensus is that giving to others not only benefits the person receiving, but also has a significant impact upon the welfare of the giver. In Doug Oman and colleagues’ research (1999), it was found that those individuals who volunteered their time to charities tended to live longer, have higher self‐esteem, less stress, and less depression. Further research has advocated that giving is good for us, benefitting our health and longevity (Thomas, 2010). It is, however, a practice, something to be cultivated, and with continued effort it has the potential to impact positively upon our well‐being. The ways in which generosity can be nurtured are numerous. It is important to consider the motivation behind the act; the attitudes of kindness and compassion are brought to the fore, rather than any influence from the ego. How generosity is practiced could be simply to donate a percentage of income to a charity of choice, to sponsor a child’s education, or a specific

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project that would benefit a community. It does not need to be a financial contribution, we can volunteer our time. Many charities rely on volunteers to survive. We can share our expertise or an intention can be set to just help others whenever we can. Family

Evidence supports the theory that good relationships within the family unit, with friends, and the wider community are important in maintaining both physical and mental health (Cohen, 2004). If we are able to build strong connections in an expanding social network, then our sense of security, purpose, and overall happiness can be enhanced. We need our family on board with any new career or venture, their support can be motivational when challenges arise. Friends and social connections, however, require monitoring to ensure that feedback is balanced, rather than having a negative bias. Environment

In any detailed plan for one’s future the issue of environment should be included. After all, it is where we spend a huge proportion of our time, and is heavily linked to our physical health and state of mind (Srinivasan, O’Fallon, & Dearry, 2003). Intuition plays a major role when choosing a home and the environment in which it is situated; it is a critical aspect of feeling content and at ease. It may be that the existing environment is just where we need to be at this time of life, or we could be living in the country yearning for the buzz of the city, or entrenched in city life longing for wide‐open spaces. Finances

When I am working with participants to create a plan for the future the finance section always produces an anxious and emotional debate. Many of the individuals I work with are unemployed and have become adept at planning with a limited income. Nevertheless, the contributing factor that instils anxiety in most people is of universal concern; if anything is going to dampen the enthusiasm of a well‐constructed plan it will be trying to manage debt (Jenkins, Fitch, Hurlston, & Walker, 2009). The impact of dealing with financial difficulties influences every part of life. It not only impairs the ability to function on a day‐to‐day basis, but also, as research suggests, can play a major part in creating mental health issues (Fitch, Hamilton, Bassett, & Davey, 2011). If there are concerns regarding finances, then this warrants a detailed plan to reduce and eventually clear debts. The freedom this will create to advance the overall plan of action cannot be overestimated.

Planning the Way Forward: An Unfolding Journey

Spirituality

Defining spirituality is a difficult proposition; it is a very individual ­concept, with room for a multitude of perspectives. We could describe it as a search for meaning in life, or a sense of connection to something bigger than ourselves; it is, however, a shared human experience that resonates with us all. Spirituality is not necessarily tied to a religious belief or tradition; it is a personal experience, a universal connection. A sense of spirituality can arise by simply walking in nature, or during meditation or prayer. It sometimes surfaces in times of suffering, loss, or major change, often with an intuitive quality that suggests guidance. Most people want to live with better health, inner peace, a sense of meaning, and direction in life, yet it is perhaps our spiritual side that can most influence this desire. The encouragement here is to examine just what spirituality means, exploring those moments when a sense of connection arises, and allowing the space to spend time with this mysterious yet life‐affirming insight.

­Exercise: Stepping into the Future The power of visualization practices is well documented (Ranganathan, Siemionow, Liu, Sahgal, & Yue, 2004), with an array of celebrities and athletes eager to attribute their success to this technique. Jim Carrey, Oprah Winfrey, and Will Smith have all openly shared how visualizing potential success has helped to get them where they are today; while in the world of sport, visualization can add Wayne Rooney, Jonny Wilkinson, and Andy Murray to its list of supporters. It is not necessary to adopt a particular posture for this practice other than to be comfortable, in a quiet place, and where you will not be ­disturbed. The idea behind this visualization is to step into the shoes of the life that is shaped by the action plan; it is simply a mental rehearsal. Like any rehearsal, the more it is practised the more polished it becomes. It is important to imagine that all the goals have already been achieved to really live and feel it; it is not a wish or a desire, but a new reality. Remember, the subconscious mind cannot distinguish what is real and what is imagined. Before beginning, take a little time to drop into the flow of the breath, to enter into stillness, and to settle the mind. When ready, expand the attention to include the body, noticing any physical sensations, feelings or emotions, and allowing it all to just be there. Then, begin to create images in the mind of your new lifestyle. It could  be images of working in a new career or with family in a new

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environment. Make the pictures vivid, really seeing yourself in these ­surroundings, and, importantly, really sensing the feelings and emotions that are arising as you visualize each scenario, see it, feel it. It is very much like a movie in the mind, a movie where you are the scriptwriter and the director. It will perhaps feel a little strange and contrived at first, but with consistent practice it will prove to be a powerful motivational technique that will bring the action plan to life. It is recommended that the exercise be practised for 5–10 minutes per day.

­Summary The journey of transformation is a personal quest that requires a flexible and personalized approach if a successful outcome is to be achieved. The goals that are set need to be important and authentic to the individual, thus ensuring continued and sustainable progress that transcends the inevitable challenges and setbacks that will arise. The exercises and ­suggestions described in this chapter have proved valuable and productive in instigating change in clients engaged in the TIME Programme. The programme is delivered in a group format, therefore the dynamic is influenced by participant collaboration and shared experience that can prove instrumental to progress; however delivery on a one‐to‐one basis would be a suitable alternative option. The meditative and visualization practices are a vital ingredient, and provide the stability from which ­participants can confidently acquire new skills that lead to the fulfillment of their personal action plan. It is important to remember that the overriding aim is the unearthing of an authentic path to a more fulfilling life; this will be different for every individual, the magnitude of change is irrelevant.

­References Cohen, S. (2004). Social relationships and health. American Psychologist, 59(8), 676. Craft, L. L., & Perna, F. M. (2004). The benefits of exercise for the clinically depressed. Primary Care Companion to the Journal of Clinical Psychiatry, 6(3), 104. Dane, E., & Pratt, M. G. (2007). Exploring intuition and its role in managerial decision‐ making. Academy of Management Review, 32(1), 33–54. Fitch, C., Hamilton, S., Bassett, P., & Davey, R. (2011). The relationship between personal debt and mental health: Systematic review. Mental Health Review Journal, 16(4), 153–166.

Planning the Way Forward: An Unfolding Journey

Fulwiler, C. E., & de Torrijos, F. (2011). Mindfulness and health. Psychiatry Information in Brief, 8(2), 1. Goodman, A. (2012). Work–life balance. In R. D. Urman, & J. M. Ehrenfeld (Eds.), Physicians’ pathways to non‐traditional careers and leadership opportunities (pp. 25–34). New York: Springer. Jahnke, R., Larkey, L., Rogers, C., Etnier, J., & Lin, F. (2010). A comprehensive review of health benefits of qi gong and tai chi. American Journal of Health Promotion, 24(6), e1–e25. Jenkins. R., Fitch, C., Hurlston, M., & Walker, F. (2009). Recession, debt and mental health: Challenges and solutions. Mental Health in Family Medicine, 6(2), 85–90. Locke, E. A., & Latham, G. P. (2006). New directions in goal‐setting theory. Current Directions in Psychological Science, 15(5), 265–268. Mento, A. J., Martinelli, P., & Jones, R. M. (1999). Mind mapping in executive education: Applications and outcomes. Journal of Management Development, 18(4), 390–416. Oman, D., Thoresen, C. E., & McMahon, K. (1999). Volunteerism and mortality among the community‐dwelling elderly. Journal of Health Psychology, 4(3), 301–316. Ranganathan, V. K., Siemionow, V., Liu, J. Z., Sahgal, V., & Yue, G. H. (2004). From mental power to muscle power: Gaining strength by using the mind. Neuropsychologia, 42(7), 944–956. Srinivasan, S., O’Fallon, L. R., & Dearry, A. (2003). Creating healthy communities, healthy homes, and healthy people: Initiating a research agenda on the built environment and public health. American Journal of Public Health, 93(9), 1446–1450. Svejenova. S. (2005). ‘The path with the heart’: Creating the authentic career. Journal of Management Studies, 42(5), 947–974. Thomas, P. A. (2010). Is it better to give or to receive? Social support and the well‐being of older adults. Journal of Gerontology B: Psychological Sciences and Social Sciences, 65B(3), 351–357. doi: 10.1093/geronb/ gbp113. Vina, J., Sanchis‐Gomar, F., Martinez‐Bello, V., & Gomez‐Cabrera, M. C. (2012). Exercise acts as a drug: The pharmacological benefits of exercise. British Journal of Pharmacology, 167(1), 1–12. World Health Organization (WHO). (2009). Global health risks: Mortality and burden of disease attributable to selected major risks. Geneva: World Health Organization.

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16 In Conclusion Life is a series of natural and spontaneous changes. Don’t resist them – that only creates sorrow. Let reality be reality. Let things flow naturally forward in whatever way they like. (Lao Tzu, 1993) The learning that comes from the Living Mindfully and TIME programmes is an unfolding process, whether participating or delivering the programmes one should allow for this natural progression. That process may not unfold within the confines of the designated timeframe, and may manifest after the programme ends through participants continuing to practice mindfulness meditation and work with newly acquired techniques. The mindfulness attitudes underpin everything that is taught and practiced, every one important in its own right. However, in terms of flow and emergence of awareness and insight, it is perhaps non‐striving and patience that hold the key to potential progress. We must always remember the human trait of expectation; participants arrive with hope and, in some cases, desperation due to a prolonged period of being unwell. Those delivering the programme can bring their own anticipation of outcomes, fuelled by the desire for others to progress, to be healed. The orientation process is the ideal opportunity to address any issues, whether they are physiological, psychological, or practical; in fact, it could be argued that the programme begins at this point. The care taken here can have a significant bearing upon how the individual approaches the programme and engages with the group. As the sessions unfold it is very much a personal journey, people acquire knowledge and understanding at differing rates. Important insights can be generated by ­engaging in a mindfulness practice, the reading of a poem, or through the inquiry process. Something seemingly insignificant can produce a ­realization that changes someone’s view of life, interpretation of an event, or belief about themselves. It is the teacher’s remit to provide the Living Mindfully: Discovering Authenticity through Mindfulness Coaching, First Edition. Gary Heads. © 2017 John Wiley & Sons, Ltd. Published 2017 by John Wiley & Sons, Ltd.

In Conclusion

environment and guidance that enables this process to take place; mindfulness will take care of the rest. The Living Mindfully and TIME programmes can intertwine or stand alone, however, both share a common theme. Whether they are approached because of a desire to improve well‐being or to discover a path to a more authentic lifestyle, attending will require the individual to develop awareness, to awaken to their present reality and unlimited potential. It is therefore essential that participants establish and sustain a daily mindfulness practice, and that the teacher or organization supports that practice in the long‐term. From early research up to the present day, the evidence has pointed to  mindfulness improving confidence and self‐esteem (Kabat‐Zinn, Lipworth, & Burney, 1985). Yet with the suggestion that authenticity emerges from mindfulness practice (Heppner & Kernis, 2007), the role of self‐esteem has to be questioned. Does it hinder or promote progress, and can it be replaced with self‐compassion? Does being true to oneself eliminate the need for sustained self‐esteem and self‐confidence? If we are guided by research and feedback from thousands of past participants who have embraced this theory, then the answer is a resounding yes. You have only to read the testimonials within these chapters to understand the impact and potential mindfulness‐based coaching has to offer. Human beings have a remarkable ability to instigate change, to see through belief systems, conditioning, automatic pilot, and negativity. Introducing mindfulness and setting a true direction in life can instil resilience and determination, allowing the emergence of an intuitive and responsive approach rather than decisions based on reactivity. The Living Mindfully and TIME programmes should be viewed as the building blocks for establishing a mindfulness practice, and the beginning of an authentic life journey, they point the way. It is up to the ­individual to take the first step, and to continue exploring the landscape.

­Training to Teach In the delivery of any mindfulness‐based programme the integrity of the training hinges on the teacher’s own mindfulness practice. It is not just the words that participants are guided by, but also the teacher’s presence, the embodiment of his or her personal mindfulness practice. We can describe in detail the attitudes of mindfulness, but it will be how the teacher embodies these attitudes that participants will model. Therefore, before any training is undertaken individuals should complete an eight‐ week mindfulness programme with a recognized organization or ­appropriately trained teacher. This should be followed by a period of

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personal daily practice of no less than six months. If the decision is then made to complete teacher training, it is recommended that the training pathway is a minimum of one year (see Appendix 2). For those interested in delivering the Living Mindfully or TIME programmes details can be found at: www.livingmindfully.co.uk or www.garyheads.co.uk.

­References Heppner, W. L., & Kernis, M. H. (2007). ‘Quiet ego’ functioning: The complementary roles of mindfulness, authenticity, and secure high self‐esteem. Psychological Inquiry, 18(4), 248–251. Kabat‐Zinn, J., Lipworth, L., & Burney, R. (1985). The clinical use of mindfulness meditation for the self‐regulation of chronic pain. Journal of Behavioral Medicine, 8(2), 163–190. Lao Tzu. (1993). Tao Te Ching, trans. S. Addiss & S. Lombardo. Indianapolis, IN: Hackett.

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Appendix 1 ­Review of Mindfulness Research Listed below is a selection of research papers, with particular relevance to mindfulness‐based interventions and coaching. Baer, R. A. (Ed.). (2010). Self‐compassion as a mechanism of change in mindfulness‐ and acceptance‐based treatments. Assessing mindfulness and acceptance processes in clients: Illuminating the theory and practice of change (pp. 135–153). Oakland, CA: Context Press. Baron, L. (2012). Developing authentic leadership through experiential training: An empirical study. Academy of Management Proceedings, 2012(1), 1. Bergen‐Cico, D., Possemato, K., & Cheon, S. (2013). Examining the efficacy of a brief mindfulness‐based stress reduction (Brief MBSR) program on psychological health. Journal of American College Health, 61(6), 348–360. Collard, P., & Walsh, J. (2008). Sensory awareness mindfulness training in coaching: Accepting life’s challenges. Journal of Rational‐Emotive & Cognitive‐Behavior Therapy, 26(1), 30–37. Davidson, R. J., Kabat‐Zinn, J., Schumacher, J., Rosenkranz, M., Muller, D., Santorelli, S. F., Urbanowski, F., Sheridan, J. F. (2003). Alterations in brain and immune function produced by mindfulness meditation. Psychosomatic Medicine, 65(4), 564–570. Donaldson, S. I., Dollwet, M., & Rao, M. A. (2015). Happiness, excellence, and optimal human functioning revisited: Examining the peer‐reviewed literature linked to positive psychology. Journal of Positive Psychology, 10(3), 185–195. Hayes, A. M., & Feldman, G. (2004). Clarifying the construct of mindfulness in the context of emotion regulation and the process of change in therapy. Clinical Psychology: Science and practice, 11(3), 255–262.

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Appendix 1

Josefsson, T., Lindwall, M., & Broberg, A. G. (2014). The effects of a short‐term mindfulness‐based intervention on self‐reported mindfulness, decentering, executive attention, psychological health, and coping style: Examining unique mindfulness effects and mediators. Mindfulness, 5(1), 18–35. Klatt, M. D., Buckworth, J., & Malarkey, W. B. (2009). Effects of low‐dose mindfulness‐ based stress reduction (MBSR‐ld) on working adults. Health Educational Behaviour, 36, 601–614. Lee, G., & Roberts, I. (2010). Coaching for authentic leadership. Leadership Coaching. Working with Leaders to Develop Elite Performance, London, pp. 17–34. Longshore, P., & Sachs, M. (2015). Mindfulness training for coaches: A mixed‐method exploratory study. Journal of Clinical Sport Psychology, 9(2), 116–137. Moore, M. (2013). Coaching the multiplicity of mind: strengths‐based model. Global Advances in Health and Medicine, 2(4), 78–84. Nila, K., Holt, D. V., Ditzen, B., & Aguilar‐Raab, C. (2016). Mindfulness‐ based stress reduction (MBSR) enhances distress tolerance and resilience through changes in mindfulness. Mental Health & Prevention, forthcoming. Passmore, J., & Marianetti, O. (2007). The role of mindfulness in coaching. Coaching Psychologist, 3(3), 131–137. Robins, J. L. W., Kiken, L., Holt, M., & McCain, N. L. (2014). Mindfulness: An effective coaching tool for improving physical and mental health. Journal of the American Association of Nurse Practitioners, 26(9), 511–518. Smith, B., Metzker, K., Waite, R., & Gerrity, P. (2015). Short‐form mindfulness‐based stress reduction reduces anxiety and improves health‐related quality of life in an inner‐city population. Holistic Nursing Practice, 29(2), 70–77. Spence, G. B., Cavanagh, M. J., & Grant, A. M. (2008). The integration of mindfulness training and health coaching: An exploratory study. Coaching: An International Journal of Theory, Research and Practice, 1(2), 145–163. Van Berkel, J., Boot, C. R., Proper, K. I., Bongers, P. M., & van der Beek, A. J. (2014). Effectiveness of a worksite mindfulness‐related multi‐component health promotion intervention on work engagement and mental health: Results of a randomized controlled trial. PloS one, 9(1), e84118. Virgili, M. (2013). Mindfulness‐based coaching: Conceptualization, supporting evidence and emerging applications. International Coaching Psychology Review, 8(2), 40–57. Waters, L. (2011). A review of school‐based positive psychology interventions. Australian Educational and Developmental Psychologist, 28(2), 75–90.

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Appendix 2 ­Guide to Teacher Training For those wishing to explore the option of training to teach mindfulness‐ based interventions there is further information on the website associated with this book at: www.livingmindfully.co.uk. The first step on the journey is always the completion of a mindfulness‐based stress reduction (MBSR) or mindfulness‐based cognitive therapy (MBCT) eight‐week programme; this is followed by a minimum of six months’ personal practice. MBSR/MBCT eight‐week programmes are widely available throughout the world, although it is always advisable to check the teaching credentials of those delivering the programme. Living Mindfully is a member of the UK Network for Mindfulness‐ Based Teacher Trainer Organisations and adheres to the Good Practice Guidelines for Trainers of Mindfulness‐Based Teachers, see at: http:// www.mindfulnessteachersuk.org.uk. The following guidelines are considered essential for teachers of mindfulness‐based programmes.

­UK Network for Mindfulness‐based Teachers Good Practice Guidelines for Teaching Mindfulness‐based Courses

A teacher of mindfulness‐based approaches should have the following: A. Mindfulness‐based Teacher Training

1)  Familiarity through personal participation in the mindfulness‐based course curriculum that they will be learning to teach, with particular in‐depth personal experience of all the core meditation practices of this mindfulness‐based programme. Living Mindfully: Discovering Authenticity through Mindfulness Coaching, First Edition. Gary Heads. © 2017 John Wiley & Sons, Ltd. Published 2017 by John Wiley & Sons, Ltd.

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2)  Completion of an in‐depth, rigorous mindfulness‐based teacher‐ training programme or supervised pathway over a minimum of 12 months. B. Training or background required in addition to mindfulness‐ based teacher training

1)  A professional qualification in mental or physical healthcare, education, or social care, or equivalent life experience, recognized by the organization or context within which the teaching will take place. 2)  Knowledge and experience of the populations to whom the mindfulness‐based course will be delivered, including experience of teaching, therapeutic or other care provision with groups and/or individuals, unless such knowledge and experience is provided to an adequate level by the mindfulness‐based teacher training itself. An exception to this can be when teaching with the help of a colleague who knows the population to whom the course will be delivered and has a relevant qualification. They would also need to have an understanding of mindfulness‐based approaches. 3)  If delivering MBCT, knowledge of relevant underlying psychological processes, associated research, and evidence‐based practice, unless these are provided to an adequate level by the mindfulness teacher‐training programme. 4)  If delivering MBCT or other mindfulness‐based courses with a clinical population, an appropriate professional clinical training is required. C. Ongoing good practice requirements

1) Commitment to a personal mindfulness practice through daily formal and informal practice, and participation in annual residential teacher‐ led mindfulness meditation retreats. 2) Engagement in processes that continue to develop mindfulness‐based teaching practice: ongoing contacts with other mindfulness practitioners and teachers, built and maintained as a means to share experiences and learn collaboratively; regular supervision with an experienced mindfulness‐based teacher, including opportunity to reflect on and inquire into personal process in relation to personal mindfulness practice, and mindfulness‐ based teaching practice; Receiving periodic feedback on teaching through video recordings, supervisor sitting in on teaching sessions, or co‐teaching with reciprocal feedback.

Appendix 2

3)  A commitment to ongoing development as a teacher through further training, keeping up to date with the evidence base, recording and reflecting on teaching sessions, participation in webs forums, etc. 4) Adherence to the ethical framework appropriate to the teacher’s ­professional background and working context. Enquiries

If you wish to talk to a mindfulness practitioner at Living Mindfully regarding teacher training, please email enquiries@livingmindfully. co.uk, alternatively you can complete an expression of interest form on the training page at: www.livingmindfully.co.uk

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Appendix 3 Further Reading Azmatullah, S. (2013). The coach’s mind manual: Enhancing coaching practice with neuroscience, psychology and mindfulness. London: Routledge. Baer, R. A. (Ed.). (2015). Mindfulness‐based treatment approaches: Clinician’s guide to evidence base and applications (2nd ed.). Burlington, MA: Academic Press. Ciarrochi, J., & Mayer, J. D. (2013). Applying emotional intelligence: A practitioner’s guide. Abingdon: Psychology Press. Germer, C. K., Siegel, R. D., & Fulton, P. R. (Eds.). (2013). Mindfulness and psychotherapy. New York: Guilford Press. Gunaratana, B., & Gunaratana, H. (2011). Mindfulness in plain English. New York: Simon & Schuster. Hanson, R. (2009). Buddha’s brain: The practical neuroscience of happiness, love, and wisdom. Oakland, CA: New Harbinger. Hyland, T. (2015). Mindful Nation UK. Report by the Mindfulness All‐Party Parliamentary Group (MAPPG). Journal of Vocational Education & Training, 1–4. Kabat‐Zinn, J. (2013). Full catastrophe living: How to cope with stress, pain and illness using mindfulness meditation (revised ed.). London: Hachette Kabat‐Zinn, J. (2005). Coming to our senses: Healing ourselves and the world through mindfulness. London: Hachette. Kashdan, T. B., & Ciarrochi, J. (Eds.). (2013). Mindfulness, acceptance, and positive psychology: The seven foundations of well‐being. Oakland, CA: New Harbinger. Kramer, G. (2007). Insight dialogue: The interpersonal path to freedom. Boulder, CO: Shambhala Publications. Landsberg, M. (2015). Mastering coaching: Practical insights for developing high performance. London: Profile Books. McCown, D., Reibel, D., & Micozzi, M. S. (2011). Teaching mindfulness: A practical guide for clinicians and educators. New York: Springer. Living Mindfully: Discovering Authenticity through Mindfulness Coaching, First Edition. Gary Heads. © 2017 John Wiley & Sons, Ltd. Published 2017 by John Wiley & Sons, Ltd.

Appendix 3

Palmer, P. J. (2010). The courage to teach: Exploring the inner landscape of a teacher’s life. Chichester: John Wiley & Sons. Reb, J., & Atkins, P. W. (Eds.). (2015). Mindfulness in organizations: Foundations, research, and applications. Cambridge: Cambridge University Press. Shapiro, S. L., & Carlson, L. E. (2009). The art and science of mindfulness: Integrating mindfulness into psychology and the helping professions. Washington, DC: American Psychological Association. Siegel, D. J. (2007). The mindful brain: Reflection and attunement in the cultivation of well‐being, (Norton Series on Interpersonal Neurobiology). New York: W. W. Norton. Silsbee, D. (2008). Presence‐based coaching: Cultivating self‐generative leaders through mind, body, and heart. Chichester: John Wiley & Sons. Teasdale, J. D., & Segal, Z. V. (2007). The mindful way through depression: Freeing yourself from chronic unhappiness. New York: Guilford Press. Williams, J. M. G., Teasdale, J. D., Segal, Z. V., & Soulsby, J. (2000). Mindfulness‐based cognitive therapy reduces overgeneral autobiographical memory in formerly depressed patients. Journal of Abnormal Psychology, 109(1), 150–155.

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Appendix 4 Frequently Asked Questions The questions listed are frequently asked by participants prior to considering applying to attend the Living Mindfully or TIME programmes. Do I need any special clothes or equipment? You will need to wear something that’s not too tight, so that you can move and breathe comfortably. We practice breathing meditation, sitting, walking, mindful movement, and a body scan, which is usually practised lying down. We will provide mats, cushions, and blankets for everyone. If you prefer to use your own equipment, that’s fine by us. At all times you will be offered the choice of whatever position is best for you (so if you feel uncomfortable lying down, for example, you may wish to sit in a chair for the body scan). Do I need to be physically fit to do the course? No! All our practices are designed to suit all levels of physical ability and mobility. The aim is to notice the body and the breath in stillness and in movement, rather than to move in any particular way or achieve anything. You can, for example, do the mindful movement exercises sitting on a chair, and will be given guidance on how best to adapt any activities to your own needs. I have asthma and sometimes I get anxious about my breathing. Will I be able to meditate? Although we often use the breath as a focus of attention in meditation, we encourage noticing the breath ‘as it is’ rather than trying to achieve any particular type of breathing. Sometimes, we suggest a different focus (maybe the sensations in the soles of the feet) so that you can shift your attention from the breath when you feel that would be best for you. We will talk about this when we have our telephone call before you start the course, and take your advice on what might be helpful for you. Living Mindfully: Discovering Authenticity through Mindfulness Coaching, First Edition. Gary Heads. © 2017 John Wiley & Sons, Ltd. Published 2017 by John Wiley & Sons, Ltd.

Appendix 4: Frequently Asked Questions

What shall I read to prepare myself for the course? The course is experiential, we learn the practices together in the group, and practice them using guidance on CDs. You will be given a handout each week as a reminder of what we have covered in the session. There are many wonderful books on mindfulness and meditation. You could well benefit from reading them to support your onward journey when you complete the course, but you do not need to read anything at all to prepare for the course. Perhaps the greatest gift you can give yourself is to come with an open mind, follow the guidance, and just practice! Will it help me to relax or to sleep better? People who have completed the course say that what they have learned has helped in various ways, sometimes finding new responses to symptoms of depression, anxiety, stress, physical illness, and pain. There are also some reports of increased energy, self‐esteem, and confidence, as well as improvements in relationships with others. We make no promises as it depends on many factors, but turning up, doing the practice, and keeping an open mind can bring about some interesting developments! What sort of people will be on the course? People like you! Participants on our courses are drawn from all walks of life, adults who have identified a need to learn a more mindful approach. Many people are looking for new ways of responding to difficulties such as anxiety, pain and illness, particular stressors such as work, family or relationships, or maybe a wish to become a more mindful professional, manager, or parent. What brings you here is less important than your commitment to practice and learn. Our shared ‘humanness’ and the differing perspectives and experience in the group usually prove to be a significant source of support and learning. Is there any religious or spiritual aspect to the course? Mindfulness practice originates from the Buddha’s teachings and is some 2,500 years old. Over the past 30 years or so, mindfulness has been brought to the West and applied widely to respond to the stresses and strains of modern life. Our courses are based upon ancient wisdom and modern science combined. There is no religious content to our courses. My head is so full of thoughts, what if I can’t meditate? Meditation is not necessarily about getting rid of thoughts. Thinking goes on all the time, sometimes it is helpful (such as when you are ­concentrating on writing a shopping list or a report) and sometimes it is not (such as when you are trying to read a book and your mind keeps

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wandering off to worry). Our aim is to develop a different relationship to the ‘uninvited’ thinking, to respond to it rather than react, and to avoid getting pulled into long trains of thought that affect our moods and behaviour. We will be teaching that as part of the course, and as wandering thoughts come in time and time again, we will get plenty of practice. Does it matter if I don’t have time to practice between sessions? You will be asked to practice, using guidance on CDs, downloads, or the Living Mindfully app for 30 minutes every day for the duration of the course, and will need to commit to finding the time and space to do this, or to defer until a more suitable time. The course without regular practice is not likely to be helpful in any great measure. We will also invite you to carry out some mindful ‘tasks’ as part of your daily routine, although these will not be extra to what you normally do in a day. For example, we might ask you to choose a routine activity, such as making a cup of tea, and do that mindfully (we will teach you how to apply mindfulness to activities in session 1). I might have to miss some sessions, will that matter? Each session is different, so it is far better to plan to do the course when you can attend all the sessions so that you can move through the materials with the rest of the group. We know that life is not always predictable, though, and if you have to miss a session through some emergency or illness, we will work around that as best we can. If I miss a session, can I go to that session when you’re running another course? Each group’s development is different and can be affected by a new person joining, so we do not invite participants to cross from one course to another. However, if you have had to drop out of a course before mid‐way due to significant illness or bereavement, we will offer you a place on an alternative course in the future if there are places available. Will I have to tell everybody about myself and why I’m there? You will be asked to say your name at the beginning of each session, and will have the chance to take part in discussions about the meditation we are practising together and what we are learning from it. You will never be asked to tell your story or made to feel that you have to share any personal information with the group. Indeed, we tend to step out of the story of our lives and use the sessions to explore the here and now, and the potential for new ways of responding to life’s ups and downs.

Appendix 4: Frequently Asked Questions

I am not very confident and would like to bring a support worker or ask someone else in my family to come with me? We realize that coming to a group can be challenging, and we will spend some time getting to know you on the phone so that we can offer some support to you when you arrive. We would not normally advise that you bring someone to support you, as this can change how you and the other members of the group experience the course. If two people from the same family apply, we would usually suggest that they join separate groups for the same reasons. Are there any written assignments? Is there any writing to do in sessions? Writing is optional! We will invite you to make a brief note of how your practice goes during the week, and we will provide you with a sheet to make notes in your handouts. This is for your eyes only, and we will never ask you to show it to anyone or hand it in. If you do choose to make ­written notes about your practice, they can act as a useful reminder of anything you want to talk about in the group (or for future reference). You might have a very good memory and be able to do this without ­writing anything down, and that’s fine too! How many people will be in the group? There will usually be no fewer than 8 and no more than 15 people in a group. Will the room be accessible? We try to find rooms with facilities that will make everyone feel welcome and comfortable. All our courses are held in fully accessible venues with accessible amenities. If you are unsure about whether the room will be accessible to your needs, please contact us to discuss this and we will try to assist in any way we can. Is mindfulness right for everyone? Like any other course of learning, there are times when it may be easier or more difficult to take it all in, depending on what is happening in your life, and what challenges you are facing! Whilst mindfulness is a helpful response to many difficulties, the course can be challenging. Applicants who have had bereavements, major traumas, or transitions in the past 12 months are usually advised to wait a little longer, as part of the course encourages ‘turning towards’ difficulty and this may interfere in the healthy processing of loss or grief. Experience has shown that meditation practice is difficult to sustain for people who are currently dependent on substances, including alcohol,

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although it can be a helpful approach to support those who have experienced dependency in the past. We would also recommend that for anyone currently experiencing acute depression it might be best to wait until this has settled or is being successfully managed with medication. Those experiencing chronic depression may benefit from attending between episodes. Although mindfulness is being researched as a response to specific mental illnesses and conditions, our training and experience does not cover all of these, so the courses we offer are more general and may not always be suitable. Due to these limitations, we would not usually offer places to anyone currently experiencing dissociative disorders, psychosis, schizophrenia, post‐traumatic stress disorder, severe self‐harm, suicidal intent, or actions.

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Index NB Table page locators are indicated in bold. acceptance, 14, 102, 104 and awareness, 103 in daily life, 115–116 and negativity, 167–179 see also self‐acceptance Acceptance and Commitment Therapy, 15 Ajahn Chah, 48 alcoholism, 26, 37 rehabilitation, and mindfulness, viii, 3 see also drug dependency; substance misuse American Psychological Association, 134 anxiety, and mindfulness, 15, 56, 108, 154 Armstrong, Neil, 186 attachment, 91, 100, 102 and awareness, 104 attention, in mindfulness see paying attention attitudinal factors of mindfulness, 11–12, 75 authenticity, 155–164 and career choices, 192–193 link with confidence, 147, 149, 156, 164, 203

loss in childhood, 159–160 and mindfulness, 6, 7, 17, 147 and non‐judging, 12 and passion, 1, 6, 151 path to, 1–2, 137–138 as way forward, 192–200 automatic pilot see autopilot state of mind autonomy, 16, 17 definition, 17 and non‐judging, 13 mindfulness feedback category, 17 psychological concept, 16 and self‐improvement, 148 autopilot state of mind, 158–161 and awareness, 68 drift to see zoning out and food, 60n, 72 and monotony, 131, 159 and reactive choices, 15 and walking, 84 as way of life, 11, 158, 159 see also habitual thinking aversion, 91, 99, 102 avoidance, 16, 114, 163 and social isolation, 170

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awareness, 28, 57–59, 102–105 acceptance, 98, 103, 104 attachment, 104 of the body , 76–77, 80–81, 93, 99 see also body scan practice of breathing see under breathing, in mindfulness practice in conversation, 117 daily life, 52, 83–84, 97, 110–119 development, 103 distractions, 92, 94, 95 of emotion, 82, 95, 169 experiences, 92 of habitual thinking, 103, 136 judging, 94, 103–104 and letting go, 104 in mindful movement, 76–77, 80–81, 84, 85 mindful responses, 108 of nature, 118–119 of reactions, 70, 94, 103–104, 108 of sensations, 83, 85 in sitting meditation, 96 of sounds, 94 state of, 81, 96, 98 of stress, 46 and thinking, 104, 107 see also inquiry process, in mindfulness Bangor University, 2 beginner’s mind, 13, 73 body scan, 62 breathing, 162 eating meditation, 57, 59 exploring nature, 118–119 mindful movement, 75 bipolar disorder, 89 body and breath meditation, 170–172 transcript, 171–172 body language, 51

body scan practice, 21, 27, 57, 61–68 awareness, 61, 64–69 beginner’s mind, 62 breathing, 63–64 and chronic pain, 69–70 experiences, 62 exploring sensations, 64–71 falling asleep, 69 feedback on, 45, 49–50 guidance, 62–63 mind wandering, 69 origin, 61 position, 62–63 and relaxation, 47, 62 transcript, 63–68 breathing, in mindfulness practice, 12, 16, 19 awareness, 63–64 body scans, 63–64 in movement, 74 places of sensation, 38, 63–64 sitting meditation, 93 trusting, 13 see also breathing space meditation; in‐breaths and out‐breaths, in mindfulness practice breathing space meditation, 97–99, 106–107 and action steps, 112 and coping, 106–107 daily life, 97, 112–113 feedback, 97 regular, 106 three steps, 97, 99, 106 transcript, 98–99 Buddhism, 10, 197, 213 career choices, and mindfulness, 19, 192–193 Centre for Mindfulness Research and Practice, 1

Index

chronic pain managing, 89 and mindfulness, 69–70, 89 chronic fatigue syndrome, 96 coaching, 128–129 conflict with mindfulness, 129 emotional detachment, 134–135 empathy, 135–136 goals, 129 groups, 137–138 individual, 137 mindful see mindfulness‐based coaching relationships, 12 resilience, 134–135 styles, 129 collective meditation, 137 commitment to mindfulness practice, 21, 23, 57, 143, 144, 208 results, 28, 34, 72, 125, 138 sustaining, 14, 194 of time, 22 communication, 180–190 creating breathing space, 184–185 digital, 185, 187 inner, 183 letters, 185–186 mindful, 184 misinterpretation, 182, 184, 186, 187 news media, 174, 187–188, 189 and self‐esteem, 150, 182 and silence, 184–185 skills, 151, 181 telephone, 185 tonality, 185 see also language; listening; social media compassion and awareness, 57 non‐judging, 12

to others, 18, 55, 117 self‐ see self‐compassion competence as component of well‐being, 16 and mindfulness, 16, 17–18 confidence, 146–147 and authenticity, 147, 149, 156, 164 lack of, 147 over‐ see overconfidence see also self‐esteem confidentiality, 32, 39 coping strategies, 175–176 meditations, 106–108, 170–171, 175 County Durham Primary Care Trust, 24 County Durham, mindfulness coaching, vii, 3, 24 daily life, mindfulness in, 31, 53–54, 110–111, 115–117, 138 awareness, 52, 83–84, 97, 113 breathing space, 97, 112–113 exercises, 111–112, 114–115 and habitual thinking, 52 nurturing activities, 111–114 walking meditation, 83–84 Dalai Lama, 117, 184 Darlington Borough Council, 3 decentring, 168–169 depression acute, 26 chronic, 26 and mindfulness, 15, 36, 73, 140, 179 post‐natal, 179 referral to Living Mindfully, 26, 140 and social media, 183 transference, 173 Derwentside Employment Team (DET), 22, 23

219

220

Index

Dialectical Behaviour Therapy, 15 Durham County Council Public Health department, 3, 24, 41 see also County Durham, mindfulness coaching Durham Primary Care Trust, 24 eating disorders, 37, 114 eating meditation, 38, 53, 59–61, 72 and automation, 158 and beginner’s mind, 57, 59 daily life, 117 emotion, regulation of, 16, 169–170 exercise, 174–175 two‐step process, 16 empathy, 135–136 in coaching, 135 definition, 135 and mindfulness, 135–136 fear, 97, 119, 163 as an ally, 163 and avoidance, 163, 169 awareness of, 82 of failure, 143, 147, 157, 162–164 see also anxiety feedback, 108, 120 in coaching, 129, 134 examples, 46, 97, 120 and goal‐setting, 140, 195 Living Mindfully Programme, 15, 17–19, 45, 68, 120–125 negative, 198 and qualitative research, 23, 203 reaffirmation of, 45 reciprocal, 208 resulting in modification, 129 themes, 68, 97 TIME, 23 Gandhi, Mohandas Karamchand (Mahatma), 180 General Practitioners (GPs)

access to mindfulness interventions, 5 attitudes to mindfulness, 2, 5 Goldstein, Joseph, 15 Google mindfulness initiative, 15 habitual thinking, 13, 17, 49, 136–137, 141 and automatic responses, 58, 136 awareness of, 103, 136 childhood influences, 159–160 and choices, 160 and communication, 181, 182 and conditioning, 132, 150, 154 core beliefs, 167 and creativity, 160 daily life, 52 family pressure, 161 judgemental, 61 letting go, 104 and stress, 58 and unemployment, 129 health and well‐being practioners, 143–144 home practice, 71, 87, 99, 107–108 importance, 27, 28, 33, 39 requirements, 75 reviewing, 43, 49 time commitment, 21, 27, 33–34 variation, 69 horizontal inquiry, 54 impatience, 117–118, 187 combatting see patience in‐breaths and out‐breaths, in mindfulness practice and beginner’s mind, 162 body scans, 64, 65, 67, 71 mindfulness movement, 77, 78, 79 trust, 13 indifference, 91, 102

Index

inquiry process, in mindfulness, 42–55 as conversation, 42–43, 55 facilitation, 43 group methods, 54 horizontal, 54 insight, 52–53 layers, 44, 51 misconceptions, 49 noticing, 50, 58 physical sensations, 44–46 relaxation, 47 restlessness, 46–47 role of teacher, 42, 43–44, 51, 52 vertical, 54–55 Jelaluddin Rumi, 1 Jobcentre Plus, 6, 22, 141 Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 187 judging, 12, 61 and awareness, 103–104 in body scans, 61, 68 and mindfulness, 58 see also non‐judging Kabat‐Zinn, Jon, 12, 14, 21, 28 Full Catastrophe Living, 57 Kingsbury, Elizabeth, 135 Kramer, Gregory, 51 Kuno, Masanobu, 185–186 Langer, Ellen, 10 language, influences on, 181–183 letting be see acceptance letting go, 13, 14, 27 and authenticity, 142, 149 and body scans, 62 and breathing, 65, 85, 107 of habitual thinking, 104 of judging, 75 of striving, 130, 142

listening in conversation, 181–182, 184 exercise, 181–182 non‐judging, 184 to ourselves, 183–184 Living Mindfully Programme, viii, 2–3, 5, 21–29 acceptance criteria, 30–31 client base, 3 commissioning, 24–25 confidentiality, 39 contra‐indications, 26, 34–36 and County Durham PCT, 24 database, 4 and disabilities, 34 end of, 119–120 feedback, 15, 17–19, 33, 45, 68, 120–125 group format, 6, 27, 30, 33 home practice, 27–28, 32, 71 and learning difficulties, 34 and medication, 34–35, 101, 108 and mental health see under mental health issues, and mindfulness monthly practice groups, 27 and NHS, 23–24, 25 and physical health problems, 38–39 pilot for, 23–24 policies and procedures, 25 pre‐course orientation, 27, 30–41 promotion, 2–3 referrals to, 2, 14, 25–26 refresher days, 27–28 relationship with TIME programme, 6, 7 results, 3–4, 24 risk assessment, 31, 39, 40 role of teaching team, 4, 30, 42–43, 202–204 as social enterprise, 24–25 structure, 27

221

222

Index

Living Mindfully Programme (cont’d) as supportive community, 28 themes, 110 time commitment, 33–34 training for see mindfulness practitioner training see also body scan practice; inquiry process, in mindfulness; mindful movement; sitting meditation MBSR programme see Mindfulness‐ based Stress Reduction (MBSR) meditation, mindful see mindfulness practice men’s support groups, 144–145 Mental Health Foundation, 2 mental health issues bipolar, 89 depression see depression family history of, 173 and medication, 101 and mindfulness, 23, 26, 33, 36–38 obsessive compulsive disorder (OCD), 37–38 post‐traumatic stress disorder (PTSD), 37 psychosis, 36 schizophrenia, 36 suicide risk, 37 see also psychotherapy mindful movement, 21, 74, 75–87 awareness, 77 beginner’s mind, 75 feedback, 81–82 in‐breaths and out‐breaths, 77, 78, 79 link with ancient practices, 75 noticing, 77, 87 position, 77 spinal curls, 79

stretching, 76, 77–78, 80 transcript, 76–82 tuning in, 76 see also walking meditation Mindful Nation UK Report, 4–5 mindfulness, definition of, 10–11, 31–32 Mindfulness All‐Party Parliamentary Group, 4 mindfulness‐based coaching, 128–138 and direction, 129–130 emotional detachment, 134–135 empathy, 135–136 exercises, 133–134 and habitual thinking, 136–137 maintaining focus, 132–133 performance enhancement, 131–133 practitioner requirements, 128 TIME programmes see TIME programmes and unemployment, 6, 22–23, 129 Mindfulness‐based Cognitive Therapy (MBCT), 15, 36, 207, 208 Mindfulness‐based Relapse Prevention (MBRP), 37 Mindfulness‐based Stress Reduction (MBSR), 1, 14–15, 21–22 adaptations, 22 clinical trial, 21–22 and depression, 15 eating meditation, 60 effectiveness, 15, 21 and Living Mindfully Programme, 21 origins, 14–15 sustainability, 21 time commitment, 21–22 training for, 4, 22 use of silence, 21

Index

mindfulness exercises, 174–175, 183 body and breath, 170–172 decentring, 168–169 eating, 59–61 see also body scan practice; breathing, in mindfulness practice; eating meditation; mindful movement; mindfulness practice; sitting meditation; walking meditation mindfulness healthcare interventions, 2, 6, 14 availability to GPs, 2, 5 combined with coaching, 130 contra‐indications, 25–26, 33 evidence in favour, vii, 2, 6, 135 see also mindfulness research financial constraints, 22 and mental health issues, 23, 36 see also Living Mindfully Programme; TIME programmes mindfulness practice, 4, 27–28 beginner’s mind see beginner’s mind breathing see breathing, in mindfulness practice in conversation, 117, 151, 183 core elements, 27, 38 distractions, 47–48, 93, 133–134 emotion regulation see emotion, regulation of examples see mindfulness exercises experience of colour, 166 and everyday life see daily life, mindfulness in group, 6, 27, 28, 33 inquiry process see inquiry process, in mindfulness practice intuition, 162

patience, 117–118, 202 as personal journey, 202–203 pillars of, 12–14 regular see regular mindfulness practice and relaxation, 47 and stress, 46, 114–115 and striving, 13, 47, 130, 142 support groups, 28, 144–145 sustaining, 27 time commitment, 33–34 and well‐being, 16–17 and wisdom, 15, 115, 156 writing notes, 114, 161, 169 mindfulness practitioner training, 4, 30, 203–204 availability of, vii–viii, 15, 207 guidelines, 207–209 prerequisites, 203–204, 207–209 Mindfulness Practitioner Training Programme, 4 mindfulness research, 142, 203, 205–206 see also research evaluation, of mindfulness mindlessness, 10 and communication, 150 and distraction, 132–133 TV, 114 motivation family influence, 198 and goal‐setting, 194 lack of, 176 sustaining, 14, 53, 194 techniques, 200 and workload, 196 National Health Service (NHS), 22 mindfulness delivery, 5 neuroplasticity, 168 NHS Health and Well‐Being Programme, 143–144 TIME module, 143

223

224

Index

Niebuhr, Reinhold, 115 non‐judging, 12–13 awareness, 12 conversation, 184 reflection, 169, 174 see also acceptance; compassion; self‐compassion Northumbria University, 3 North Wales, mindfulness coaching, 1 see also Bangor University obsessive compulsive disorder (OCD), 37–38 orientation process, for mindfulness programmes, 30–41, 71, 146, 202 and choice of programme, 145–146 confidentiality, 32, 39 evaluation, 41 family history, 173 group, 146 information checklist, 38–39 managing student expectation, 31, 32–33 questions posed, 32–39 telephone, 27, 30–31, 146 and risk assessment, 30–31, 39, 40 skills, 30 and student suitability, 30–31, 32 overconfidence, 136, 147 and self‐esteem, 156 Pali language, 10 passion, importance of, 130, 151 and authenticity, 1, 6, 151 patience, 28, 117–118 and awareness, 12, 92, 93 non‐striving, 202 skills, 12–13

paying attention, 44 to breathing, 12, 16, 19, 38 to emotion, 95 to experiences, 11, 13, 27, 45–46, 110 inner, 9 moment‐to‐moment, 57 and physical ailment, 38 to physical sensations, 45, 64–69, 94 to sound, 94–95 to thinking, 95 see also body scan practice personal growth as component of well‐being, 16 and mindfulness, 18–19, 136 personal relationships, 198 on autopilot, 130, 159 and coaching see coaching emotional contagion, 173 family, 173 and grief, 35 and health, 198 and mindfulness, 17, 19, 102, 123, 213 pressures, 123 and well‐being, 16, 17 physical health, and mindfulness, 38–39 Picasso, Pablo, 193 post‐traumatic stress disorder (PTSD), 37 psychology Buddhist, 10 of communication, 189 and mindfulness, 3, 4, 6, 73 of unemployment, 22–23 of well‐being, 4, 16, 157 psychosis, 26, 36 and mindfulness, 36, 216 psychotherapy, 101 qi gong, 75

Index

reflective journalling, 122, 174, 175, 196 regular mindfulness practice, 11, 16, 31, 53, 110, 125 breathing space, 99, 107 establishing, 116 home, 27, 116–117 mindful movement, 75, 83 sitting meditation, 92 see also daily life, mindfulness in relationship to experience emotions see emotion, regulation of and empathy, 135 the media, 188 mindful, 102, 103, 105, 108, 111, 143 pain, 89 and work, 196 see also autopilot; awareness; habitual thinking; letting go relationships, personal see personal relationships relaxation, and mindfulness, 17, 19, 31, 32, 47, 213 body scan meditation, 49–50, 62–63 deep, 75 and silence, 175 and tension, 46, 120 research evaluation, of mindfulness, 17–19 MBSR, 21 TIME, 22, 142 see also mindfulness research resilience, 134 and mindfulness, 3, 126, 134–135, 149 Roosevelt, Eleanor, 149 Rumi see Jelaluddin Rumi schizophrenia, 36 Scott, Robert Falcon, 186

self‐acceptance, 14, 16–17, 137 as component of well‐being, 16 and mindfulness, 17 see also self‐esteem self‐care, 17–18, 102, 110–111 self‐compassion, 156–157 alternative to self‐esteem, 156–157 definition, 156 and failure, 157, 162 and group support, 137 in mindfulness practice, 135–136, 147, 156 and psychological well‐being, 157 and resilience, 157 see also acceptance self‐esteem, 148–149, 156 and authenticity, 155–164, 203 and communication, 150 definition, 147, 155 and depression, 19 and failure, 9, 143, 162 issues, 137–138, 140 and mental health, 22, 140 and mindfulness, 6, 137, 140, 142, 148–149 and negativity, 149–150, 177 and self‐compassion see self‐compassion and unemployment, 6, 22, 142 silence and listening, 184 in Living Mindfully Programme, 27 in MBSR programme, 21 see also sound, in mindfulness practice single mothers, 144 sitting meditation, 21, 27, 92–100 awareness, 96 breathing, 93 distractions, 93 feedback, 96–97

225

226

Index

sitting meditation (cont’d) posture, 92–93 sounds, 94–95 transcript, 92–96 see also breathing space meditation social media influence of, 173–174, 183 and mindfulness, 183 sound, in mindfulness practice, 47–48 staying present, 90–92 stress, 114–115 habitual thinking, 58, 114 indicators, 114–115 and mindfulness, 46, 114–115 physical symptoms, 46, 114 reactions, 114 see also post‐traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) striving, 13 and human nature, 47 in mindfulness practice, 48 and restlessness, 47 substance misuse and mindfulness, 26, 37 suicidality, 37 Suicide Intervention Skills Training, 37 technology, communications, 186–187 see also social media teenagers and depression, 140 displaced, 143 goal setting, 143 joint pain, 89 one‐to‐one therapies, 137 unemployment, 137 Thich Nhat Hanh, 188–189 thinking and acceptance, 102–106 awareness of, 104, 107

breathing space meditation, 106–107 and distraction, 95 and emotion, 95 as event, 104–105 habitual see habitual thinking mindful, 95, 104–105 negative, 9, 23, 47, 105, 192, 195 stream of, 104 visualization see visualization TIME programmes, 5–7, 141–200 adaptation, 145–146 and basic skills, 23 and communication skills, 151, 180–190 development, 141 displaced teenagers, 142–143 evaluation, 22, 23, 127 expectations, 202 group dynamics, 137, 200 and Living Mindfully, 145–146 for men’s support groups, 144–145 and mindfulness‐based coaching, viii and motivation, 6, 22 national roll‐out, 142 and negativity, 149 NHS training module, 143–144 origin of, 22 populations, 142–146 pre‐programme orientation, 146, 202 and quality of life, 6 and resilience, 149 and self‐esteem, 6, 22, 149 and single mothers, 144 structure, 6 teaching, 146, 202, 203–204 and unemployment, 6, 22–23, 137, 144 visualization, 150, 199–200 Tomlinson, Ray, 186–187

Index

Topham, Bernadette, 23, 24 Training Individuals in Mindfulness and Excellence see TIME programmes Transcendental Meditation, 1 transference, emotional, 135, 163, 173–174 families, 173 news media, 174, 188 social media, 173–174 trust, 186 in mindfulness process, 13, 42, 51, 53 teacher–participant relations, 30 unemployment and coaching, 129 and fear of failure, 157 and mindfulness, 6, 22–23, 137 vertical inquiry, 54–55 visualization, 199–200 and anxiety, 49, 69 and awareness, 49 celebrity endorsement, 199 life events, 162, 164, 169 meditation, 105, 162, 164, 169, 199–200 scenarios, 150, 169 suitability, 105

volunteering, 197–198 and careers, 143 for research, 142, 145 walking meditation, 21, 27, 75, 82–87 daily life, 83–84 distractions, 83 feedback, 86–87 transcript, 84–85 Warwick–Edinburgh Mental Well‐being Scale, 3–4 well‐being and autopilot thinking, 158 and choices, 54 definition, 16 and mindfulness, 4, 16–19, 108, 184, 197 and negativity, 173, 188 positive attitudes for, 108, 110 practitioners see health and well‐being practioners psychological, 16 White, Randall P., 129 Witherspoon, Robert, 129 zoning out, 57, 58, 158–159 and automatic responses, 58, 159 and difficult thoughts, 91 and mindfulness, 68, 99 prevalence, 157–158

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