Christian Teachers in Public Schools : 13 Essentials for the Classroom [1 ed.] 9780834128644, 9780834127968

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PRAISE FOR CHRISTIAN TEACHERS IN PUBLIC SCHOOLS Christian Teachers in Public Schools is a must read for teachers wanting to legally impact the public school culture. This collection of thoughts and stories provides encouragement and helps equip Christian teachers to make a difference in the schools they are called to serve. —Finn Laursen Executive Director, Christian Educators Association International

This book made me laugh out loud, and it also made me cry. I recommend reading it at the beginning of a school year to get you started, in the middle to keep you going, or at the end to celebrate. You will find refreshment for your soul and encouragement for your profession. —Sonia Johnson Professor and Chair Education Department Bob Jones University Greenville, SC

This book is a gentle yet urgent reminder that those who care for others must also care for themselves. Teachers who want their lights to burn brighter without burning out should take heed of these thirteen essentials. —Marie Fraley Duncan Former Public Elementary & High School Teacher Licensed Marriage & Family Therapist

Dalene Parker is a seasoned and conscientious classroom teacher with much to offer both the young and veteran educator. She understands the boundaries regarding religion in the public classroom and, within that context, provides wise, practical, and tested advice for teachers. Her counsel is beautifully spiced with many interesting stories and practical examples. Most importantly, her contribution comes from a loving heart that cares deeply about her students. —Calvin Mercer, Ph.D. Professor of Religion Director of Multidisciplinary Studies Program East Carolina University

Parker gives a frank personal account of her struggles and triumphs as a Christian teacher in South Carolina’s public schools. Writing with honesty, compassion, and optimism, she shows educators everywhere that their Christian faith doesn’t have to be left at the classroom door. —Joyce Coggins Former Public High School Teacher Instructor, Theological Research and Writing Erskine Theological Seminary

CHRISTIAN T E A C H E R S IN

PUBLIC S C H O O L S 13 ESSENTIALS FOR THE CL ASSROOM

D A L E N E V I C K E R Y PA R K E R

Copyright 2012 by Dalene Vickery Parker and Beacon Hill Press of Kansas City © 2012 eISBN 978-0-8341-2864-4 Printed in the United States of America Cover Design: Lindsey Rohner Internal Design: Sharon Page All Scripture quotations not otherwise designated are from the Holy Bible, New International Version® (NIV®). Copyright © 1973, 1978, 1984 by International Bible Society. Used by permission of Zondervan Publishing Company. All rights reserved. Permission to quote from the following additional copyrighted versions of the Bible is acknowledged with appreciation: The New King James Version (NKJV). Copyright © 1979, 1980, 1982 Thomas Nelson, Inc. Scripture quotations marked KJV are from the King James Version of the Bible. Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data Parker, Dalene Vickery, 1959Christian teachers in public schools : 13 essentials for the classroom / Dalene Vickery Parker.   p. cm. Includes bibliographical references. ISBN 978-0-8341-2796-8 (pbk.) 1. Religion in the public schools—United States.  2. Christian teachers—United States. 3. Teaching—Religious aspects—Christianity.  I. Title. LC111.P37 2012 371.10088'27—dc23 2012000759

DEDICATION This book is dedicated first and foremost to Jesus Christ, the greatest teacher of all, with whom all things are possible and without whom I could do nothing. And to my family, my students, my colleagues and friends— all of whom have taught me to pay attention to what is truly important. . . . for from him and through him and to him are all things. To him be the glory forever! Amen. —Romans 11:36

CONTENTS Acknowledgments Preface Introduction   1.  Learning to Pray: Prayerful Preparation   2.  Learning to Fight: Spiritual Oppression   3.  Learning to Wait: Just Give It Three Days   4.  Learning to Care: Personal Problems   5.  Learning to Shine: Competence/Confidence   6.  Learning to Work: Whatever You Do   7.  Learning to Share: Teacher, Not Preacher   8.  Learning to Love: Handling Hostility   9.  Learning to Laugh: Lightening Up 10.  Learning to Exercise: Gaining Ground 11.  Learning to Persevere: The Worst Thing 12.  Learning to Seek: Resources 13.  Learning to Let Go: Coping with Loss Notes About the Author

ACKNOWLEDGMENTS My deepest gratitude to all the precious friends and family members who offered prayer support, contributed insight, shared stories, and provided nourishment and encouragement for my body, soul, mind, and heart. Thank you to my children, Daniel and Susanne, for believing in me and loaning me your eyes to see what mine missed. Thank you to my husband, Pat, who insisted I get a real job; otherwise, I may have never been a teacher.

PREFACE Throughout my years of teaching, I have attended Christian writing conferences either for spiritual renewal or as mentor to a friend or relative with writing ability or aspirations. Often I take back to my classroom skills or markets suitable for my students. However, at the 2010 Florida Christian Writer’s Conference (FCWC), Judi Perry of Beacon Hill Press “found” me and began asking some uncomfortable questions: “Haven’t I met you before? Aren’t you a teacher? Weren’t you supposed to send me something last year?” After a vain attempt at trying to persuade her of poor memory, I confessed. We made another appointment to discuss the book proposal I was supposed to send her the previous year. Then Christine Tangvald, prolific children’s author and animated speaker, lit a stick of dynamite under me with these words: “Listen to me. You’ve been given a great opportunity. You have a passion for teaching and an ability to write. You have an editor interested in your work and teachers who need to hear your message. We need someone to encourage the Christian teachers in our public schools. Now go write this book!” Anyone who knows Christine also knows you don’t say no when she directs or corrects. It matters not that she stands little more than four feet tall. Her energy and enthusiasm for sharing God’s love through writing explode like firecrackers so that either you catch on fire yourself or move far, far away in order not to be affected! My humble thanks go to Christine and Judi for their encouragement. Billie Wilson, director of the FCWC, also spurred me on. God used these women to light the spark I hope will glow in the dark for teachers who need a light for their way.

INTRODUCTION While completing graduate studies in the education department of a local Christian university, I have enountered several viewpoints regarding Christians teaching in public schools. Some act as though the idea itself is taboo, as though somehow a Christian teacher would be out of God’s will in a secular educational system. Some are afraid they would not be able to maintain discipline or motivation since they could not legally use Scripture as a means of correcting students. Others think Christians choose public schools over private Christian schools because of the paycheck. Then there are teachers who recognize their calling to teach specifically in the public school realm. They recognize the vast opportunity for positive influence on lost young people or the need for a resource and support system for Christian students. Obviously, there are those who don’t know, those who want to know, and those who do know. This book is meant to encourage, equip, and inform you regardless of which position you hold and regardless of where you have been called to teach. In the pages to follow, it may surprise you to find how often students in public schools reference their belief in God or their admiration for people of faith without prompting or pressure. Simply providing an atmosphere of loving acceptance and asking God to mature the fruits of the Spirit in your own life will usually be enough to ensure that students feel safe speaking about their own faith. Taylor D., a senior who chose to attend public school after several years in a private Christian school, reflects on her preference for Christian teachers in public schools:

It matters a great deal to me that my teacher is a Christian. I would like my authority to better me, to teach me how to be a better person, help keep me disciplined. I can tell which of my teachers are Christian by their attitudes, their actions, their morals, even how they say things. You can just tell they are different. They stand out for their good deeds and the ways in which they show their love for students. You can just see the light in them. For Taylor, who had a choice about where she would attend school and for those who do not have a choice, Christian teachers are called to be different, stand out, show love, shine light. Through this book, may the Holy Spirit speak to you about how to renew yourself and your commitment to provide a spark that may very well point the way to the Light of the World. Let your light so shine before men, that they may see your good works, and glorify your Father which is in heaven. —Matthew 5:16 KJV

ONE

LEARNING TO PRAY PR AY ERF UL PREPA R AT IO N I pray that out of his glorious riches he may strengthen you with power through his Spirit in your inner being. —Ephesians 3:16 NIV

Lunch at last. I hurried to Rosie’s room for a break and some nourishment. I didn’t just need to get away from my classroom; I needed some prayer time with my friend. Rosie and I chatted briefly about the highlights or struggles of the day thus far, then bowed our heads together to pray. In those few moments together, we claimed God’s provision for our students’ vast needs and wisdom and strength for ours. A few bites and a quick gulp later, we were back at it, doing what God called us to do as teachers—refreshed and reminded that we are not alone and that His power working in us will complete the tasks He called us to do. That prayer time together got us through some difficult days and challenging situations. Even though we have taken separate paths since those first years of teaching, we still support each other through prayer, phone calls, and notes of encouragement. Friendships forged by spiritual connections never fade away. It is the same with my first bosses and colleagues from twentyfive years ago. I will always be grateful God paired me with godly people whose support, enthusiasm, compassion, and wise counsel kept my first teaching experiences from being total disasters. For those whose light, love, and laughter now accompany me down the halls and into the classrooms—Carolynn, Pam, Sheila, Sherry, Hannah, Cynthia, Teresa, Marilyn, Myra, and too many others to name—all of whom mean it when they say they will

pray—I am so indebted. God has graced me with colleagues and coworkers who know how to find a spark and ignite it into a flame that burns brightly for His kingdom. After all, not one of us is meant to journey alone. Christian teachers in public schools need each other. Hopefully, this book will be like a friend who shines a light for you into the places you have been called to teach.

Not Just Survivors Yet, even with encouragement, many of us barely survive our teaching days, always eyeing our school calendars for the next day of freedom. As Christian educators, however, we are meant to thrive, not just survive. We must find and offer freedom even within the confines of our classrooms. Although there will be days when we can manage only to put one foot in front of the other, most days we can stand firm and steady, walk briskly and with purpose, and teach enthusiastically with passion. A Ziggy comic my cousin Susan sent me my first year of teaching comes to mind. In it, Ziggy is consulting his “to-do” list. The list is very short, yet encompasses the entire day: 1. Get up. 2. Survive. 3. Go to bed. Pretty simple, but also profound. Some days, surviving seems like a victory. Thriving may be an optimistic dream. But because we serve the one “that is able to do exceeding abundantly above all that we ask or think, according to the power that worketh in us” (Ephesians 3:20 KJV), nothing is impossible. For Christian educators, the public school can resemble a minefield or a mission field. Though the territory is fraught with potential problems and challenges, it is also filled with countless opportunities to live out our faith and draw others to Christ through our actions and reactions toward people and circumstances. But first we must be equipped, beginning with prayer. According to James Rhee, an inner-city teacher on staff with Teachers’ Christian Fellowship in Canada, support is the single big-

gest need of Christian teachers. Simply put, prayer functions as an essential and effective tool for meeting that need. Rhee purposefully forges fellowship and prayer partnerships between teachers in his city. He emphasizes the importance of prayer with these questions: “Are teachers feeling supported? Do they sense they are being prayed for? Individually, do teachers have the sense that God is with them in their classroom? This comes only through prayer.”1 In addition, prayer is also one of the greatest ways a Christian teacher impacts his or her students and colleagues for Christ. Prayerful preparation should be the hallmark of any major undertaking for a Christian. This is especially true for Christian teachers in public schools. The calling we have to prepare, nurture, encourage, and inspire is noble, but daunting. Planning and executing meaningful lessons that address every learning style and level while aligning with state standards and incorporating technology provides a challenge all its own. Added to that, we must manage our classrooms with firmness and fairness, finding the balance between understanding students’ individual needs and circumstances while holding them responsible for achieving at their highest aptitude and operating with a positive attitude. While these are actually the obligations of any competent, caring teacher, Christian teachers recognize opportunities far more purposeful within those obligations. In her book review of Julia and Gloria Stronk’s Christian Teachers in Public Schools: A Guide for Teachers, Administrators, and Parents, Sharon Harris sums up the Stronks’ assertions. In spite of legal limitations, teachers have the following opportunities: to express their faith through caring interaction with students; to teach effectively, thus enabling students to develop their unique God-given gifts; to model and commend in their students values such as honesty, respect, and compassion; and to teach about religion within the curriculum.2 Prayer is another way teachers influence their students for Christ, often without the student even knowing it. Although Christian teachers may not evangelize or advocate a particular religion, there’s nothing to prohibit a teacher from prefacing every lesson plan or class meeting with silent prayer. Actual-

ly, for those students who reveal particularly distressing behaviors or background situations, prayer is often a teacher’s most powerful tool. Although in most cases the student will never be aware of prayers offered in his or her behalf, there may be occasions that a Christian teacher feels led to express his or her concern by offering to pray for a troubled student.

What a Difference Prayer Makes When asked how a teacher had impacted his life in a positive way, Justin had this to say: My most positive influence at school would have to be Coach C. I was going through a hard time and I was very sad and not talking much at wrestling practice because my mom found out she had a very deadly cancer. One day, Coach C came up to me and asked me what was wrong, so I told him. He told me the only thing I could do is to pray and ask God to have mercy on my mom and heal her back to her normal self. So that’s what we did. Every day I would go down to his office and Coach C would pray with me for almost thirty minutes. Every day he would tell me that no matter what happens, I always need to keep my trust in God. Then one day as I was going home, Coach C stopped me and told me that my parents had just called and said there was no more cancer. The doctors said it was like a miracle, but I knew it was just the hand of God. Coach has shown me that you can be a help in a time of need by just the small things that you do. I’m so glad Coach C helped me in my time of need. The following e-mail confirms what a difference prayer made to another teenager. To: Dalene Parker Dear Mrs. Parker, We have not met yet, but I wanted to tell you what an impact you have had on my son, Elliott. At the beginning of this year, Elliott started off badly. He was really down one morning when he came into the lab. You said something as simple as “I’ll

pray for you,” and it touched him so deeply that even now (last night) when we were praying together, he thought of you and got choked up. He said how funny it was that someone could say something nice and it makes such a difference in a person’s life. I told him that was the Holy Spirit flowing from you to him. I also told him that he is able to have the same impact on his friends and people around him. He is trying to change some of his negative ways (sarcasm, joking at others’ expense, typical teenage guy behavior). Please remember him in your prayers. Thank you for being attentive to the students. What you did one morning without a second thought has remained with Elliott and made a lasting impression. You know, when Mama says, “I’ll be praying for you today,” it doesn’t seem to mean quite as much as it does coming from someone else. I thank you for what you did for him. May God heap back on you all kinds of blessings! Sandi D. P.S. Elliott wants to tell you this himself, but he gets choked up about it. He doesn’t know I’m sending this, but I know he would want me to.

God’s Timing and Answered Prayers Little did I know that God would later allow me to forge a friendship with this grateful mom that went far beyond the classroom. Three years after this e-mail, I needed a woman to accompany me on a ten-hour drive to the Florida Christian Writers Conference. I had not planned to go that year, but Tyler K., a gifted student-writer at the school where I teach, wanted to attend and needed someone to act as his guide. After much prayer, I asked the Lord to make it unmistakably clear that He intended me to go. The first indicator came when my superintendent granted professional leave. That had never happened before, mainly because of the Christian nature of the conference. Thankfully, however, our superintendent saw the validity of a writing teacher honing her craft and helping a student. I still had to pay part of my way

(supplemented by the generosity of a small scholarship from Billie Wilson, conference director, and prolific author Cec Murphy, bless them), but I was granted leave. The second “fleece” depended on Tyler securing the necessary funding. Again, God used generous people who donated funds for his assistance. With his parents’ permission, Tyler borrowed from his college savings to make up the remainder. The third fleece was the greatest hurdle of all. I knew I needed to have another female along in the car on such a long drive, just for propriety’s sake. I had no idea where to find such a companion. Of course, God did. A few weeks before the conference, Sandi Denkers placed the manuscript of her amazing Christian novel, Plowing Memory’s Field, in my box at school, so I could have a look and tell her what I thought. Prior to that, I had no clue Sandi was a writer, much less such an accomplished one. She had been working on her book for ten years, had finally completed it, and wanted advice about her next step. Sandi knew of my keen interest in writing from her substituting in my classroom and her invaluable assistance on the school literary magazine when drafted as our “copy lady” for a time. After reading with great delight the first few chapters of Sandi’s novel, I called her. “Sandi, I have a question to ask you that you may need to think about before you answer. I have been praying for a traveling companion to the Florida Christian Writers Conference, and I believe you are the one. I had no idea you were an author, but now that I’ve seen a sampling of your writing, you need to attend this conference to let editors and agents see your work.” It took only a day or two for Sandi to analyze her budget and rearrange her plans before calling me back with an enthusiastic yes. What an amazing and delightful friend God provided in answer to this need. Not only was Sandi an excellent traveling companion and relief driver, she also had a tremendous sense of humor, sensitivity to others, and most importantly, a tolerance of my snoring (earplugs provided courtesy of the snorer). Many confirmations followed God’s leading and His working in our lives through prayer and people.

At the conference, Tyler won the Writer of the Year award. The fact that he was one of a handful of teenagers there among the 200plus adults made this honor even more amazing. With the award came a $200 check from WinePress Publishing, exactly the amount Tyler needed to pay back his college savings. But God’s hand was still working mightily. Tyler also received a contract from Lee Emory, an editor with Treble Heart Books, who was eager to publish Tyler’s fictional account of an unborn child whose mother has to choose between him and the baby’s father. Tyler’s book, As Rain Falls, has since come out in print and has already begun the good work for which it was intended—saving the lives of the unborn. All this—and more—because of prayer partners at home, school, and church praying for God’s traveling mercies and His will to be done at the conference. Another unexpected blessing came when God confirmed His calling on me to write this book.

Prayer Walks I am convinced that prayer is responsible for the sense of spiritual openness and receptiveness in the public school where I teach. Instead of our school being a minefield where we have to tread lightly, stay hidden, hunker down, and ready ourselves for explosive outbursts, it is more of a mission field where spiritual seeds can be sown and harvests reaped through the careful use of the power of prayer. Naturally, Christian teachers must exercise discretion and sensitivity appropriate to the situation and the student, but the Holy Spirit will guide and provide what should and shouldn’t be said when personal prayerful preparation has paved the way. At the beginning of each new school year, Teresa B. sends an e-mail like the one below to teachers prior to the first student day. From: Teresa B. Sent: Monday, August 08, 8:01 a.m. Subject: Prayer Walk For the past several years, I have done a “prayer walk” through the school where I currently teach. My purpose is to pray at every door where children and adults pass through as well as every classroom. Another vital part of my prayer walk

is the office and the offices of the administrators, as well as the cafeteria where the students gather during their “free” time. The first year in a school is always a difficult one, because I don’t know the students or the teachers. The following years become easier as I learn more about my new colleagues and students. I usually do this prayer walk around 6:30 one of the mornings before the children begin. Here is how you can help me. If you have a prayer request and would like me to pray for something specific when I reach your classroom, please either e-mail me the request or write it on a piece of paper and put it in my box—along with your room number, please. I promise all prayer requests will remain confidential. Teresa’s offer to pray brought tears to my eyes and comfort to my heart as I asked her to remember me as a teacher new to the school and asked her also to pray for my two children who were new students who would be walking those halls and entering those classrooms for which she prayed. In the following years, I have joined Teresa and other teachers on the prayer walk. This year was particularly meaningful as we met first in her room to pray for God’s comfort over the death of her father one month prior. Marilyn, a coworker from across the hall, joined us and provided a wonderful scripture for ongoing motivation: “Let us not become weary in doing good for at the proper time, we will reap a harvest if we do not give up” (Galatians 6:9). Teresa took her Bible and opened it to the passage the Lord guided her to once again. She said her Bible falls open to this same passage every year during her prayer walk: The Spirit of the Lord God is upon Me, Because the Lord has anointed Me, To preach good tidings to the poor; He has sent Me to heal the brokenhearted, To proclaim liberty to the captives, And the opening of the prison to those who are bound; To proclaim the acceptable year of the Lord,

And the day of vengeance of our God; To comfort all who mourn, To console those who mourn in Zion, To give them beauty for ashes, The oil of joy for mourning, The garment of praise for the spirit of heaviness; That they may be called trees of righteousness, The planting of the Lord, that He may be glorified. —Isaiah 61:1-3 NKJV What a powerful feeling to know our personal prayer requests are remembered and our classrooms and hallways are covered with the peace of Christ. Let’s commit to starting not just every school year but every school day by asking for God’s guidance, protection, wisdom, and direction. Knowing how early teachers start preparing for the day, this is a challenge in itself. Yet drawing encouragement and instruction from the greatest teacher of all is essential as we face needy children and new challenges for which human resources are simply not enough. Father, thank you for your presence in my life and in our school today. Thank you for providing all the resources, energy, enthusiasm, patience, and wisdom I need for the students who enter my classroom. Help me to understand and meet their academic, emotional, and spiritual needs today through instruction, encouragement, and example. No matter what this day holds in terms of opportunities or obstacles, I know you hold me in the palm of your hand. You are able; I am available. You are wise. I am willing. Now, Lord, please teach through me today. In Jesus name I pray. Amen.

Note: See Chapter 12 for resources available through The Christian Educators Association International for teachers who desire to establish prayer groups at school. This organization not only supports teachers through prayer, but reminds them that prayer makes a difference in the classroom and in the heart and life of the Christian teacher.

SALT SHAKERS In the Closet But when you pray, go into your room, close the door and pray to your Father, who is unseen. Then your Father, who sees what is done in secret, will reward you. —Matthew 6:6

In the past fifteen years, I have never been moved to clean out my closet. I never catch the spring cleaning bug. But this past weekend, I could not stay out of my closet. For a couple of hours I threw out, organized, and redistributed its contents. Then I thought, What am I doing? I have more pressing issues than this! In the coming week I was facing deadlines, decisions that needed to be made, houseguests who would be arriving, and a long list of errands. There was so much that needed my attention, I didn’t know which way to turn. Maybe that’s how I ended up in the closet. After cleaning it out, I rather liked it. It provided wonderful alone time with God, and I went back in it throughout the weekend. I think God planned it for me. God, did you invite me into the closet? So many days I start off in a frantic state not sure of where or how to get started. This weekend, you helped to clear my mind and closet, and you reminded me that I need to start the day with just you—in prayer—in my closet. I need to ask for your direction and guidance in all areas of my life. Thank you for clearing the clutter and reminding me to start out my morning talking to you first. You can get the junk out of the way and make way for what really matters, serving you and others with a grateful heart.

Have a refreshing filled day. Veneal Williams has graciously given me permission to use a selection from Salt Shakers, her e-mail devotional, at the end of each chapter.

TWO

LEARNING TO FIGHT S PIRI T UA L O P PRES SIO N Not by might, nor by power, but by my spirit, saith the Lord of hosts. —Zechariah 4:6c, KJV

How Long Do You Hold on to Junk? I first read about the Khian Sea in Max Lucado’s book, A Love Worth Giving. The idea of hauling around the same garbage for so many years intrigued me, so I did some research. In 1986, this ship left Philadelphia packed with 15,000 tons of ash intended for disposal somewhere with spare landfill space. The problem was, there was no place wanting that much trash, so the garbage barge roamed the world for nearly sixteen years, refused at one port after another. From the Caribbean to Europe to Africa and Asia it went, changing its name twice, switching its flag of registry, all to no avail. Desperation led to dumping ten thousand tons of ash overboard illegally and two executives were sent to prison. The portion allotted to the beaches of Haiti as “fertilizer” was ordered reclaimed by the United States Government after environmentalists raised a stink. A new barge was dispatched to pick up the old waste. Finally, after undergoing intense testing by the United States Department of Agriculture and the United States Environmental Protection Agency, the ash was deemed nonhazardous, and the remaining garbage came to its final resting place sixteen years later, only a few miles from its point of origin.1 This story convicted me. Not only am I guilty of holding on to too much “stuff” in my classroom and my home, I also tend to haul around trash and ash from times in the past I’ve been “burned.” I

can still trace the noxious fume trail from anyone who has been obnoxious to me. Not good. Hauling grief around for too long can be just as toxic or spiritually oppressive as holding on to resentment or rage. All of us are going to experience loss of one kind or another during our educational careers. Some mourning time is natural and even necessary for processing strong emotions and memories, working through possessions and the past, and making plans for the future. But when that grief lingers so long that black clouds hang over your heart every day and you can’t seem to move on, what do you do with it? Here is a suggestion I made to my friend Debra. After her beloved grandmother endured a long season of dementia, with Debra as the primary caretaker, “MawMaw” died. This would have been hard enough since Debra was much closer to her grandmother than to her own mother. Instead of family members offering support to each other, squabbles among family members erupted. A few weeks later, Debra’s brother-in-law passed away suddenly. Meanwhile, Debra and her family were scrimping by on her husband Dean’s unemployment check while he searched diligently for another job. She was totally stressed out and having trouble lifting her head, much less her heart. After a plea to her online prayer partners for help, I wrote the following response: Dear Debra, This is only a suggestion, and not meant to disregard your very real reasons for experiencing depression, but I have found it helpful and I hope you will: Instead of asking God to change your circumstances or to lift your depression, try thanking Him for being all sufficient. Remind Him of His promises never to leave or forsake you and to supply all your needs. Praise Him for every beautiful flower, snuggly pup, or loving word you encounter. Pray as though what you need and desire is already in motion rather than yet to be. I know you are a tremendous prayer warrior, and the devil would like nothing better than to keep you down and discouraged. Rebuke him in Jesus’ name and PRAISE THE LORD!

Claim these verses and pray them back to God every time a depressing thought enters your mind: Have I not commanded you? Be strong and of good courage; do not be afraid, nor be dismayed, for the Lord your God is with you wherever you go. —Joshua 1:9 NKJV And God is able to make all grace abound toward you, that you, always having all sufficiency in all things, may have an abundance for every good work. —2 Corinthians 9:8 NKJV May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in him, so you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit. —Romans 15:13 Another thing I find helpful is to pray each word of each verse slowly as I meditate on all the power and meaning each word holds. Sometimes you may be praying or praising through your tears, but they will turn to tears of joy. Lord, thank you that you are the lifter of Debra’s head. Thank you that you hold her in your arms and will minister to her hurts and meet her needs. Thank you that you will open her eyes to the ways you in your infinite wisdom and tender mercy are working out your perfect plans in her life. May she sense your presence in such a way that your power, peace, and provision give her all the more reason to praise you. Love you, Girl! Dalene Several months later, Debra wrote this precious tribute to her Maw-Maw. Though she still misses her grandmother terribly, Debra has learned to see her loss in a different way, through eyes of awe and gratitude. For the first time since 1963, South Carolina had snow on Christmas Day, and Debra believes Maw-Maw just may have had something to do with that. She writes: Ever since I can remember, the week before Christmas I would start verbally wishing for a white Christmas.

Every year Maw-Maw would say, “Well, you never know, we may get it this year.” Of course, it never came. This year, Maw-Maw’s first Christmas in heaven—and me missing her like crazy—I get my white Christmas. I told Dean and the kids that Maw-Maw sent it from heaven as my Christmas gift. She has never missed a year in my life of giving me a Christmas gift. The snow made my heart smile for what was a hard Christmas without her. I walked outside and looked up at the sky with soft snowflakes landing on my face and hair and said, “Merry Christmas, Maw-Maw. Thank you for the Christmas gift.” I can just see her smiling down at me saying, “You’re welcome, Sunshine.” Debra has learned that the acts of singing and praising can actually function as mighty weapons. “Fighting” involves learning to praise God even in the hard times and learning to thank Him for the gifts and remembrances He sends our way. Remember the story of Jericho in Joshua 6? God instructed Joshua and his men to march around the walls of that great city seven days without so much as shooting an arrow or throwing a rock at the enemy within. Instead, the Israelites were to blow their trumpets and shout. This unexpected method of battle unnerved the inhabitants within the city more than any arsenal ever could. As you know, the walls came tumbling down. When the walls you face at school—with parents, students, colleagues, administration, or your workload seem insurmountable, try using praise music to surround those walls, and give a victory shout, exercising your faith that God will provide a way for you without you having to fight. Before the students arrive in the morning, my friend Pam turns up the praise music in her room while she prepares for the day. What a wonderful reminder of who is in charge of our classrooms! There are other ways to win a battle without engaging in it. In Nikki Grimes’ novel Bronx Masquerade, she relates an incident

in which a peaceful means of resolving conflict actually accomplished far more than any fistfight ever could. The character Sterling is standing in the cafeteria line minding his own business when an antagonistic peer purposely dumps honey on his shoes. His new shoes. Sterling counts up to ten and then back down again before responding. He also shoots an arrow prayer to God asking Him to help control his temper. After all, Sterling’s goal is to make it through high school with a clean record so he can become a teacher and have a positive influence on thugs like the one trying to rile him. When Sterling responds to the flagrant offense by grabbing his opponent for a kiss on both cheeks, the antagonist flees the scene, shaken by Sterling’s unexpected kindness. This character’s actions remind us how much stronger good is than evil. Because I want my students to learn how to “fight” with their heads and not with their fists, I use this scene from Bronx Masquerade as a writing prompt about a time when they chose to resolve conflict by making a conscious choice to act in a peaceful manner. Many of them have never been taught how to win without fighting. Both the real Gideon and the fictional Sterling provide exemplary models.

The Real Ideal Here is a fighting challenge for all of us. What if we purpose to reverse offenses into blessings through prayer and petition? Let’s choose not to nurse our grudges or rehearse them to others. Start today determined to bless your colleagues, administrators, students, and family members regardless of how many insults or inconveniences you may suffer. Staying in control of your emotions without letting them control you is a battle, but one you can win with unconventional methods. Imagine your mind constantly de-cluttered. Picture peace in your heart and on your face. That picture doesn’t have to be an ideal; it can be real, but not in your power: “Not by might, nor by power, but by my spirit, saith the Lord of hosts” (Zechariah 4:6 KJV). Psalm 119:37 NKJV shows us how to maintain God’s priori-

ties: “Turn away my eyes from looking at worthless things, And revive me in Your way.”

Greater Is He What about the times when a student becomes abusive or even tries to cast a spell on you? One day a student asked me an unusual question: “Mrs. Parker, did you happen to have any bad luck yesterday?” I thought for a minute, then answered. “No, why?” “Oh, no reason. I just wondered.” Later, another student returned at lunchtime to explain the reason for the odd question. “Mrs. Parker, yesterday when you were teaching, D____ was in the back of the room arranging crystals on her desk and muttering a spell over them to give you bad luck. She told us not to touch the crystals, but I thought you ought to know. I’m sure glad nothing bad happened to you.” My eyes widened in surprise, but my immediate verbal response was “I’m glad, too, but those crystals had no power over me. I believe the Bible when it says ‘Greater is he that is in you, than he that is in the world’(1 John 4:4b). But thank you for telling me. I appreciate your concern.” Thankfully, that was the first and last time that I’m aware of anyone tried to cast an actual demonic curse on me in the classroom, but God had prepared me for spiritual warfare, and I was not unnerved by the situation. Of course, I am grateful nothing bad happened that this student could have perceived as a result of her “power.” I’m sure God took care of that for me since He knew about the curse before I did. Although I had some inkling that the student was into witchcraft, because I had seen her Wiccan book sticking out of her book bag and had overheard her talking about sacrificing cats in the woods, I had no real knowledge of how her “religion” worked or what kind of hold it had on her. Instead of taking it to the principal, I took it to the Lord. After all, there is nothing in the discipline code about the punishment for casting spells on teachers! During lunch that day, I took my

Bible out of my desk drawer and placed it on this young woman’s desk. I prayed for her and asked God to remove this source of evil and lure of enchantment from her life. I thanked Him for protecting me and my family from any semblance of “bad luck” she might have taken credit for. And do you know what happened the next day? The student refused to sit in her usual desk. She said it had a weird aura around it and she couldn’t sit there. I’m hoping that the “weird aura” she experienced that day eventually compelled her to Christ rather than repelled her.

Spiritual Questions Interestingly enough, the young woman’s friend, the one who inquired about my bad luck, ended up asking me a very spiritual question right out loud in class one day. “Mrs. Parker, do you believe in demons? I had a demon in my bedroom last night.” It is my understanding that when a student initiates a discussion about spiritual matters I have a right to answer that student as long as what I say is not dogmatic. So my reply went something like this: “Yes, I do believe in demons. But I also believe in God, and I believe His power is greater than that of any demon. If you’re interested in talking more about this topic, come by and see me after school one day.” Fully Equipped Whether you are off and running at the beginning of a new school year, catching your breath in the middle, or sprinting furiously toward the end, it is essential to keep your spiritual armor buckled on strong. Every morning, buckle on that breastplate of righteousness, cinch up that belt of truth, shod your feet with the preparation of the gospel of peace, fasten on your helmet of salvation, and hold tight your sword of the Spirit—the Word of God. Now with the other hand, go forth with the shield of faith before you and know that you have the victory already won through Him who calls and equips you for every good work.

Finally, my brethren, be strong in the Lord, and in the power of his might. Put on the whole armour of God, that ye may be able to stand against the wiles of the devil. For we wrestle not against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this world, against spiritual wickedness in high places. Wherefore take unto you the whole armour of God, that ye may be able to withstand in the evil day, and having done all, to stand. —Ephesians 6: 10-13 kjv Father, Thank you that you go ahead of us into each new day to prepare and protect us from the trash and the trauma the enemy desires to throw our way. You are mighty to save, Lord, and your power is above all. Remind us to put on the armour you have provided and to spend the time we need in your Word to be ready to face each situation with our shield of faith in hand. The victory is ours to claim— through you.

SALT SHAKERS How Are Your Grades? Jesus said “The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full. —John 10:10

Some of us have been struggling with disastrous Ds this year. There is a fraudulent teacher among us, known as the father of lies. His motive and goal is to deceive, defeat and destroy. If you have been caught in his web of lies, do not fear. Now is not the time to be discouraged! Final grades have not been submitted. Is it possible to improve your grades? Absolutely! Remember, with God all things are possible, even improving your grades. If you have failing grades, then examine whose teachings you’ve been under. Jesus, who is all powerful and all knowing, is our one, true teacher. And failure, my friends, is not part of His

plans. We might suffer and struggle through some lessons, but we will not stay there. Victory in Him is assured for all His children who abide in His truth. He has in store for us an abundant life! Can I hear an Amen? In all things we will praise God. . . . at all times! Have an awesome, grace-filled day!

THREE

LEARNING TO WAIT JUS T GI V E I T T HREE DAYS But they that wait upon the Lord shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings as eagles; they shall run, and not be weary; and they shall walk, and not faint. —Isaiah 40:31 KJV

Just Give it Three Days To my delight and surprise, Lucille Godwin, my English professor at Mars Hill College, took time for many private talks during my years there, expressing interest not only in my academics, but also in my relationships and in my future. Her calm, lady-like demeanor and poise impressed me whether I was listening to her lectures, talking with her in her office, or visiting in her home. Along with her husband, Dr. Joseph Godwin, she embarked on a four-year-long confidence-building campaign for my benefit. Both Godwins challenged me to see myself through God’s mind, not just my own distorted perceptions or those of others. In fact, Dr. Godwin’s reassurance that I was worth my weight in gold still brings comfort when the scales and my clothes indicate a heaviness I find harrowing. Mrs. Godwin, however, is the one who deserves the credit for some of the most valuable advice I have ever received. One day after the demise of a distressing romantic relationship, Mrs. Godwin invited me into her office for a heart-to-heart talk. Sensing that something was amiss because of my unusual listlessness during class, she asked, “What is bothering you, Dalene?” I slumped into a seat across from her and poured out my tale of woe.

With a rueful smile, Mrs. Godwin admitted, “My prayers have been answered. I did not think very highly of the young man you were dating.” Then she offered the following words of wisdom. “Dalene, you probably think what you’re feeling couldn’t be worse, but let me help you put in perspective.” Her cobalt eyes bored into mine. “When Jesus was crucified, the disciples went through the darkest period in history. They thought their lives were at an end. Never had the world looked more hopeless. Never had their dreams been so shattered. Yet only three days later, look how the picture changed. Jesus rose from the grave, and with His resurrection, He restored their purpose and their power.” Continuing, she challenged me to make a personal application. “When you are facing difficult times and must make hard decisions or deal with unbearable people or situations, just give it three days. Often things will look entirely different. Your focus will be much clearer and your hope restored. By then you will likely know what to do next. Just wait, trust, and pray. Then obey.” I lifted my head, took a deep breath, and gave her a wobbly smile. “Thank you,” I whispered, nodding. “I’ll think about what you’ve said.” Not only did the just-give-it-three-days principle propel me through that trying situation, it has helped me through countless trials and challenges since. In addition, I have passed it on to many others caught in discouraging or seemingly impossible circumstances. Now, when my heart and mind are challenged or overwhelmed, instead of giving in to despair, I just give it three days. I wait, trust, and pray. Then obey. Thank you, Mrs. Godwin, for the impact your teaching and your advice still have on my life.

Just Give it Three Years! Carmen Bayón, a teacher from Spain who recently returned to her native country, knows what it’s like to struggle with waiting:

I’m afraid I’m not the best person to learn about waiting or having patience, because here I am in Spain trying to figure out what to do with my life after having spent six years in the USA trying to figure out what to do with my life. What I should probably do is stay somewhere and just wait for things to fall into place. But I’m not patient enough! Well, in my case the right advice is not “Just give it three days,” but three years. Why? Because this is how long my visa lasts. Year one I’m thinking: A ticket back to Spain on the next flight, please! Year two: Well, it’s not that bad. Year three: I must be crazy, but I love it! The first year you want to die. You want to disappear: new country, new people, new house, new job, new “old” car, and— roll of drums, please—a class full of teenagers looking at you and making weird faces at your accent, and you feel the smallest person in the world. You take a deep breath, calm down, and repeat to yourself, “I’m stronger than they are! I’m stronger than they are.” And guess what! You actually are, but it is not until the second semester or even the second year that you realize it. The third year is actually wonderful. Teachers know you, students know you, and you have finally found that place where teaching makes you happy with yourself and what you do. What I’m trying to say here is that if I had given up when I couldn’t take it any longer and let my personal circumstances overwhelm me, I would have missed that awesome feeling of personal and professional realization.1

Delays and Detours Of course, Carmen’s well-deserved confidence in herself and in the Lord provided strength for waiting and adapting to all the changes, whether in the USA or in her home country Spain. Yet sometimes even the strongest sense of confidence can be shaken when circumstances spin out of control. That’s when it helps to be flexible and willing to yield our plans to a higher plan. Carmen’s return to Spain has meant unexpected and constant care for sick family members, so her teaching career is on hold for

the present. But she sees the blessing in that delay as well. After all, delays and detours are often part of the divine plan. We may not always see the benefit, but God, in His perfect timing, will reveal it to us. The movie Faith Like Potatoes provides a powerful lesson on learning to wait on the Lord and trusting Him for timing and for our needs. Angus Buchan, a Scottish farmer living in South Africa, is plagued by natural disasters, financial hardship, and political turmoil. He responds to his difficulties with increasing anger and frustration, to the point of alienating his wife and ruining his health. Then Angus gives his life to Christ and experiences a transformation that constrains him to share his faith.

Dry, Dusty Soil Despite the severe drought and civil unrest plaguing South Africa, and making it dangerous to live there, Angus feels compelled to trust God and plant potatoes even when all common sense dictates the foolishness of such an enterprise. But Angus had already seen the Lord work two miracles: raising an African woman back to life after she was struck dead by lightning and sending rain in the midst of a drought to quench a disastrous fire. Yet, even after he obeyed what he believed God asked him to do, plopping the “seed potatoes” into dusty rows, there was still not a drop of rain for four months. Harvest Day In those four months, Angus did not so much as even peek beneath one mound of earth where the potatoes should be growing. Yet, on harvest day, Angus sent word for all the field workers to meet at sunrise to pray and gather the crop. What amazing faith he evidenced when he took his hoe and began to dig. And how God rewarded that patient trust—with a harvest of God-sized potatoes like none they could have ever dreamed! This movie strummed a chord in my heart regarding the students who are so difficult to reach, those who compare to dry dust.

For them, it appears we are wasting energy and effort when we strive to plant something of worth and hope for a harvest. Recently, I became greatly discouraged by the response of a young man named Shawn when I took him aside for a “motivational” talk. He was failing my class and showing no indication of interest or effort. “I don’t really care if I fail or not. In fact, if you give me a failing grade, I’ll probably just laugh. I don’t like this class, and I don’t like the subject. And it’s the only class I’m failing, anyway. I’m passing math and science.” “How are you managing to do well in those classes?” I asked, hoping to discover some insight for helping him in my class. “I just find smart people to copy from,” was his too-honest reply. Hardened soil? Absolutely. Who but God knows what is really taking place beneath the surface? Within the few months granted to me as an opportunity for influence and instruction, I believe God will unearth just the right tools, subject matter, and methods I need to reach that young man and help harvest some brain matter. I will definitely make this a matter of faith and prayer.

Start Sooner; Go Slower Detours, delays, waiting; all have something in common, something people like me have great difficulty adjusting to: slowing down. Some of the best advice my mom ever gave me was to “Start sooner and go slower.” I need to follow that advice more often. In the last year, I have gotten better at starting sooner. But I have not made much progress in going slower. At the time of this writing, Christmas is two weeks away. The end-of-the-year hustle has put me in more of a headlock than usual. I simply have too many big projects and responsibilities going at the same time. My family members are commenting about how out-of-breath I sound on the phone and how fatigued I look in person. Some of my students put it a bit more euphemistically. Brittany told me she knew “important people” were busy and I sure was busy. Courtney said I looked like a hummingbird, flitting back and forth, flapping my wings all the while. These are not compli-

ments but warning signs. My mind flashes back to a time when I was careening down a two-lane road running late for a conference meeting when all of a sudden I saw a construction worker frantically waving a “SLOW” sign. The look in his eyes as I skidded to a stop jolted me from my reverie. I vowed to pay more attention to my surroundings. I could have endangered his life and others by my carelessness and haste. Even if I do not actually hurt someone physically, I might wound them with thoughtless words or actions simply because I have not developed the art of waiting patiently. Recently, my husband injured his knee and hobbled along for several weeks. I knew my patience reservoir had sprung a leak when we were running late to church and I called back to Pat from the church door: “Hurry up! Limp faster. Come on!” Not exactly the picture of patience. We should have started sooner so we could go slower. After all, we serve a God of order, not confusion. Just today, in Jesus Calling, Sarah Young’s words from Christ’s point of view convicted me—again: “If you want to work with Me, you have to accept My time frame. Hurry is not in My nature.”2 From this point on I am going to make a more concerted effort to start sooner and go slower. I will also try to be more patient with and considerate of the “limp-alongs” in my life. .

Change of Heart In the few weeks that have passed since Shawn made those appalling and apathetic statements mentioned earlier, it appears he may be considering a necessary change. The context is our Unsung Hero project for which I asked students to select one heroic character trait they would like to see more of in their lives. Shawn chose his Uncle Travis, who had taken time to come hear Shawn’s Unsung Hero presentation and participate in a live interview as well: More Honest Travis is the person I admire the most and the one I want to take the trait honesty from. I choose this because I’m not an honest person, and I need to change that.

I need to be more honest when I do something wrong. Also, I need to focus on being honest so I don’t get sidetracked doing something I’m going to end up lying about later. I need to be more honest in the work I do in school and at home. My expected outcome of this trait is that I will be more honest with everyone and not lie when I do something wrong. Also, I will be an honest person to myself and everyone else. Shawn’s change of heart is so encouraging. However, since his evidence of effort commenced the last week of the grading period, it is possible his motives for finally making an effort may be partially related to timing. Yet I also know that even if I am unable to see lasting results, I “am confident of this, that he who began a good work in [Shawn] will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus” (Philippians 1:6). Thank you, Lord. Father, when my circumstances appear discouraging—or even disastrous—remind me that you are working your perfect will even when I cannot see immediate results. Help my faith grow and help me honor you both in the light and beneath the soil. Help me wait patiently for those I teach and those I love. Thank you that you do not command me to limp faster, but rather to rest and remain in your presence. I desire more of the order and peace you have designed. Please replace my chaos with your calmness.

P.S. By the way, Shawn was voted “Most Improved” for the year by his peers.

SALT SHAKERS Can You Wait? Be still before the Lord and wait patiently for Him. —Psalm 37:7 I waited patiently for the Lord; he turned to me and heard my cry. —Psalm 40:1

Often we find ourselves trying to do a lot in a short amount of time. We don’t need a slow computer; we need one that works at warp speed. Yet slow is the pace, and we are stuck there for now. For some strange reason, rain always appears to slow down our computers. We need sunshine outside and patience inside. We need patience not only with technology but in other aspects of life as well: Patience in getting answers, Patience in trusting, Patience in finishing the work, Patience in seeing results, Patience in getting to the end, Patience in hearing from God. Lord, my patience is being tested in many directions. Is it really a test of my trusting in you? If so, please give me the ability to endure so I can feel and see your “Son” shine in my life and spread the warmth of your love to others. I will rely on your promise that “in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose” (Romans 8:28). May you find and know me to be madly in love with you.

Have a Son-filled day!

FOUR

LEARNING TO CARE PERSO N A L PROBL EM S Each of you should look not only to your own interests, but also to the interests of others. —Philippians 2:4

Saved the Day For a writer like Linda Gilden, author of Love Notes in Lunchboxes and Love Notes on His Pillow, caring connections come naturally. However, that is not always the case for others. Consequently, the compassion of a teacher on behalf of her student still stands out in Linda’s mind nearly twenty years after the fact. Linda’s third-grade son Jeff accidentally got his dates mixed up and wore his Colonial Day costume to school a day early. Colonial Day is a huge event in elementary school. Had his teacher not been so observant, the humiliation Jeff would have experienced may have ruined it for him. When the teacher saw Jeff and his mom drive up, she rushed out to the car and urged Linda to take Jeff back home to change. She promised not to say a word and not to count him late. Christian teachers are always looking out for ways to help children save face. Another compassionate teacher took special interest in Linda’s daughter Ginger, recognizing her learning disability and making modifications for her assignments as well as teaching her learning strategies that still pay off today. Prior to that time, Ginger had grown increasingly frustrated with school. Because she was so smart, most educators would not even consider having her tested. 42

Yet her performance did not match her ability, and it was not until Ginger’s teacher began to work with her that she demonstrated her true potential.

Going the Extra Mile “I used to take him home with me on weekends,” Joyce, a retired teacher, shared. “He was a foster child, and I thought that going fishing out on the lake might be a new experience for him. He was about seven at the time. But I sure couldn’t do that these days.” Joyce’s anecdote reminds me of how teachers get so involved in their students’ lives and their personal problems as well. We probably should be trained like medical professionals not to get too attached, since we can’t “save” all of them. But for nurses and teachers alike, there will be some of those entrusted to our care we just cannot get off our minds. At times, we might as well have brought them home with us for the weekend! Unfortunately, in our present day, taking students home with us the way Joyce did is probably not a good idea. However, we still have opportunities to influence their lives and sometimes even their futures as well. One of the most effective writing prompts I used this school year was entitled “My Road of Life.” The idea came from Naomi, my friend and mentor, who frequently sends meaningful material for me to use in the classroom. In this case, she sent fascinating pictures of unusual roads that I showed to my students. One road forged through dense forests, another wound like ribbons along steep canyon walls, some climbed precipitous peaks and plunged down sharp slopes on the other side, others appeared nearly washed away by giant ocean waves, and so on. Afterwards, I asked the students to choose a road that symbolized their lives and to write about it—past, present, and/or future. I was surprised at some of the revelations that came that first week of school: Sally wrote: My road of life began fourteen years ago. I never had a childhood. Well, not like I wish I would have had. But my

childhood has helped me to be the person I am today. I have good memories from my childhood but mostly bad memories— bad memories that replay in my head over and over again. It’s like a reminder of the shame I lived in as a little girl and some of which I still live in. Everyone has something to base their life on. But I don’t know what I could base my life on. It’s really hard for me to go on every day, but I have a lot of great things to look forward to in my future. I plan on going to college after graduating from high school. Sadly, Sally has lived through adult challenges without ever enjoying a carefree childhood. For Sally and others like her, school provides a place to build a better future and make memories without shame. I want to be part of her healing process. She is so worth it. Sarah Bess Wilson, a high school teacher, demonstrates this same desire to help: “What I want most for my students is for them to learn what is truly meaningful in life, that they take away a sense of right and a sense of determination. I want good things for my kids—things that will carry them through the darkness so they may find for themselves the sparks of life. For this reason, I am a teacher.” Unfortunately, the “sparks of life” seem to have been stamped out at an early age for some students. However, as teachers we can do our best to rekindle hope and fan the flame of faith for them once we understand why there is so little light in their lives.

No Purpose Tashia shares her story of tremendous inner and outer conflict: Growing up, I’ve been called the fat girl. I’ve always had trouble dealing with my size because I was always bigger than the rest of the class. I get frustrated sometimes because I feel no self-confidence. While I was little, my mama and daddy were together. My daddy used to beat my mama and I had to sit there and watch it because he made me. Since I’m old enough now, my mama

told me that my dad used to hit her way before I was born. My mama got away after she finally realized that she shouldn’t be in that situation any longer. Now, I feel like things are better. A while ago, I started cutting myself because of the pain I went through. I felt like nobody cared, and then I tried to kill myself. I felt like there was no purpose to life. I have tried numerous times, because I felt like no one was there, people didn’t love me, and I didn’t like the way I looked. I try to be positive, but it’s hard when you feel like there’s no reason to live. I used to feel like it was my fault that my daddy and mama weren’t together. Since then, I’ve gotten help, I’ve had therapy sessions, and I’ve been put in better situations. When I look back at that time in my life, I ask myself why. Now my life has gotten a little better, although the situation with my dad is not going great. I barely speak to him; he is so negative, and now I’m trying to keep the negative things out of my life because I now know I have a reason to live. None of my friends knew that any of this was going on until I ended up in the hospital with an overdose. I still have scars on my arm from the cutting, but life’s better, and my future’s bright! I share this because it’s better to let it off my chest than let it stay and build up inside of me. You have followed me down my road of life. Tashia ended her freshman year running for student body government and being nominated for “Most Improved” in the class. She also had her testimony accepted for publication by the Christian magazine ENCOUNTER.

No Trust Slugga’s unedited story helps me realize how and why some students lose hope or stop trying at an early age: When I was seven years old, it all happened at a drug store on the south side of Atlanta, but before I can tell you that story, I got to tell you about this first. I was in the second grade. I never talked to anyone just me and my family. But one day

I got into a fight with this little dude named Da’vonta. Long story short I won and he been don lost. Ok now I’m back to the beginning the day at the corner store I was with my dad and we had just finished buying something for Mother’s Day, as we started to get to our car the boy that I had been don fought at school his dad came out of nowhere and started to shoot at us with a 45 magnum. I got hit twice in my leg and in my arm and leg. But my dad died of sick-a cells and since then I trusted no one. I can’t it’s like not even possible for me to. I never know when someone gone turn flue on me and try to come on the low low and put me 6 feet deep. That’s why I only hang wit gutta people.

No Hope Mylo struggles with depression. His self-help techniques are frightening, and all too common among today’s teens: Many insane things have been done by sane people in the struggle to overcome depression, many of which I have tried. Luckily for me, the scars on my arm are the last thing you notice. I scar rather lightly. The cold blade chasing across my skin, the sharp line of blood that follows. I still find the urge just short of unbearable on long sleepless nights. Insomnia and depression are a volatile mixture. But I know that the short break from the emptiness will be followed by weeks of longsleeved jackets. This practice of self-mutilation is tempting and addicting, but in the end I have found it ineffective in any long term solution of its underlying roots in depression. And on the topic of suicide, this I have also attempted. One must realize the gravity of the concept. While ending the life of pain and suffering may seem the advantage at first glance, one must contemplate the many things that seem to slip our minds in the heat of the moment. Like religion, for instance. For an atheist, would you rather give up and enter the eternal nothingness knowing that you failed at the only life luck has granted you? Or for a Christian, can you live out

the eons of eternity knowing that you forsook and destroyed the gift of life the Lord has blessed you with? I have struggled with this multiple times throughout my life. I tried jumping. I was afraid I wouldn’t die, just break my legs, so I went back down the elevator and cried. I tried to slit my own throat, but I didn’t have the will. I played Russian roulette, but I won. Trust me, it’s not the answer. You have to consider how this event will devastate those around you and how many people will be affected by this. The third so-called cure for depression is drugs. This tactic I have not and will not try. But contrary to popular belief, marijuana is not a drug. I do smoke marijuana because it’s the only thing that ever got my mind off the gaping crevasse of my psyche. Music helped for a while. I would write a song about the depression and it was good to get it out, but that didn’t stop it. It did, however, make for very soulful, heartfelt songs. Smoking to be healthy may seem paradoxical, but . . . I have found it works for me. I don’t recommend it to people; it affects everybody differently. I’m not promoting this to kids or anything. This is simply my story. The dangers of weed are not the weed itself, but getting it. Dealers are often shady and are already on edge. The threat of arrest is surely a daunting concept. Also, the term gateway drug, while one hundred percent possible, is far from inevitable. Whether your method is cutting, drugs, random breakdowns, random lash-outs, or marijuana, you always feel in control, until you’re not. And if you’re not careful, you become a statistic, a slave to yourself. . . .

No Peace Courtney’s essay reminds us how important it is to recognize teenagers’ connections to each other and their musings about the meaning of life: Kenny belonged to our group, though I had never noticed him. Because of that, it doesn’t seem my place to grieve. I’ve

never said a word to him, never had a class with him. I sobbed nonetheless. Funerals, to me, are mostly for lying. The words spoken of the deceased are always so sugar-coated. I tune them out and enjoy the music. But for some reason, the words spoken at his funeral by a tearful preacher stuck with me. The qualities attributed to him haunted me. This boy, gone at sixteen, had done more than I probably ever will. He seemed to be selfless and a strong Christian. He used his time on earth so wisely, while I wished mine away. Now I had it, and he didn’t. I began to wonder what a preacher could possibly say about me. And I realized that life isn’t fair, clearly, for the first time. There has been some triumph in every situation until this. I didn’t know what to make of this. I suppose that all my dark musings about life actually came from guilt. Not only did I believe that Kenny was great, but I believed that I was horrible. A month earlier, I had lied to my best friend. I already felt guilty for not returning his honesty, and now I felt guilty for being alive when Kenny wasn’t. I imagined there to be no way he carried such a secret sin as I did. . . .

Unstuck Sometimes the best remedy for helping troubled students is to get them busy thinking about others less fortunate or more limited. “Mrs. Parker, it will never work. People are too stuck on themselves to care about anyone else.” “Well, let’s get them unstuck.” My ninth graders had been studying about disease, disability, and disaster for their research projects when we became aware of a great need for one of our former students, Jeremy Vangsnes. Jeremy and his brothers were on a mission trip in Montana when they were involved in a terrible car accident that left Jeremy, a former track star, severely injured and unable to care for himself. In fact, his injuries were so serious he was actually pronounced dead on the scene and his parents were contacted about donating his or-

gans. There is even a newspaper account of his death. But God had other plans for Jeremy. When we learned that Jeremy’s younger brother Brett had designed a slogan and created a bracelet sporting the words, “Be Jeremy’s Legs,” my students rallied to the cause and began selling the bracelets to help raise funds for a wheelchair van the family needed for Jeremy’s transportation. Prior to that, the only way Jeremy could leave his house was by ambulance. His spasticity, or inability to move or bend his limbs, made it extremely difficult to conform his body to a wheelchair, much less a car seat. The entire student body, community, and area churches got involved in helping raise funds for Jeremy’s needs. Jeremy’s sister and brother made guest appearances to share the miracle of Jeremy’s survival and another brother’s recovery after serious injuries. Finally, a woman whose family had been helped in a similar way donated the van her husband had been given when he no longer needed it, and the money raised was applied to Jeremy’s many other medical expenses. Through this experience, not only did people get “unstuck” from themselves, the entire school and community rallied together to share their resources. Perhaps more importantly, the witness of Jeremy’s faith-filled family as they all coped with this tragedy, along with the testimony of his brothers through a DVD the family offered to any interested students, impacted entire families. I had no idea how deeply this project affected one student until several months later when I received this thank-you from Amber E., a student who became heavily involved in the “Be Jeremy’s Legs” fundraiser. Her letter to the family and an essay dedicated to me indicated ways God worked through the Vangsnes family tragedy to bring gratitude and significance to the forefront of this student’s mind and heart: I appreciate everything Mrs. Parker has done for me. She’s brought me from some hard times in life. At the beginning of the semester last year, I came in her class with an attitude. I wasn’t going to do anything, and no one was going to tell me what to do. After working on the Vangsnes project in her

class, Mrs. Parker and I were beginning to be on good terms. This project was bringing out the good in me, and Mrs. Parker began to see that. She was always getting on me until I straightened up. Now my attitude toward a lot of things has changed. However, I still have my moments.

Share Each Other’s Burdens Repeatedly God confirms to me that part of my job as a teacher is to share and instill compassion within my students. God means for us to share each other’s burdens and to help others in their time of need. This sharing and helping may take shape in the public arena as it did for the “Be Jeremy’s Legs project,” or it may be hand—and heart—delivered in a quiet, unobtrusive way from the Christian teacher to someone experiencing personal problems. Perhaps a coworker is dealing with a family illness, the recent death of a loved one, or one of any number of serious, pressing problems that consumes her mind and threatens to topple her emotional stability. Darts of distress pierce her armor daily as she fulfills duties at school while her mind keeps taking her back to her problem. Fatigue and fear press down upon the burden she carries, making it feel heavier than it should. This is a time to rally around your colleague in prayer, send notes of encouragement, and provide practical help through meals or finances when appropriate. It is usually best to refrain from making more than passing gestures of support during working hours, because that simple act of caring may be all it takes to crumble the facade of control your coworker must maintain to continue functioning during the workday. Try to wait until an “off-duty” opportunity—maybe during a planning period or lunchtime—to get into a detailed discussion. You could invite your colleague to join you for a walk after school to give you time to talk; or call in and pick up a take-out meal to hand to your friend in the parking lot as she leaves or take it by her home if circumstances allow. Sometimes just an e-mail or note in her box with a scripture of encouragement will be just the thing. Be assured that the Holy Spirit will prompt your spirit as to what, when, how, and where you might minister to your cowork-

ers. As the Spirit brings individuals and their personal problems to your mind, mark on your calendar significant dates that may prove to be very emotional or spiritual war zones for your colleague: surgery, doctor’s visits, holidays, or anniversaries of a loved one’s death. Just remember not to share details of that person’s trial with others, even with the good intention of asking for prayer. Of course, if you have established a close network of prayer warriors at your school, you may want to ask them to remember your mutual friend, but the details of her dilemma are not yours to divulge. This is especially true when a friend shares news that may be very sensitive. It took Gayle, an elementary teacher, a couple of months before she was ready to ask for prayer for a family situation she never expected to face: Dear friends, For several weeks Ric and I have had some news that we need to share. We are going to be grandparents. Our Sarah is going to be a mother in February. She shared this news with us this past June. Many of you know and have loved and prayed for Sarah through the years. She is twenty-five years old and is our firstborn child, one of two, and Gantt, who is twenty-two, is our second. At this point, it looks as if Sarah will be a single mother. This is not what Ric and I had planned. Sarah has been involved in our beloved church since she was six months old. She gave her heart to Jesus during her childhood and also went through “True Love Waits” as a teenager. She was very active in high school, cheering, and swimming competitively for the Vikings and finished Clemson in 2008. Our hearts have been broken, and we have cried and cried and cried. However, I know none of you will be surprised to know that God has met and continues to meet every need we have. Praise Him! I don’t think Sarah ever considered abortion (Praise God!) and she and Alex, the father of this child, are determined

to love and parent him (it’s a boy). Ric and I have gotten to know Alex a bit over the past several weeks. He is a professing Christian and is determined be a good dad. He has been very caring, kind, and supportive to Sarah. We like him. I would have liked sharing our news in person, but I can become very weepy, and it isn’t a pretty sight. Please don’t hesitate to talk to us or ask us questions about this, and if you see or talk to Sarah, feel free to discuss her pregnancy and the coming baby boy. Also, please pray for our unborn grandchild, for good health and safety, and please pray for Sarah and Alex, that they will be godly parents and fulfill their responsibilities to the Lord and to this child, and please pray that they will seek God’s will for their lives. Ric and I love you all so much! It took courage for Gayle to share her family’s burden. I sent her this e-mail in reply: Dear Gayle, Thank you for sharing your heart with us. God uses imperfect people in unexpected situations all the time to make His holiness and power even more evident. So, no judgment— only praise that He is already at work. Now, “Be of good cheer” (Matthew 14:27) and “May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit” (Romans 15:13). You and Ric are going to be fabulous grandparents! Note: A couple of months later, Gayle announced her daughter’s engagement to Alex. Their family is growing in grace and love, qualities Gayle has always demonstrated in her role as a teacher as well as a mother. I still have in my files a letter I wrote to Gayle ten years ago when she was our son’s sixth grade teacher:

Dear Gayle, Since I couldn’t think of anything original to give you as a teacher’s gift, I thought I would offer you two of life’s most valuable commodities—time and gratitude. Daniel would probably

say “Cheap, Cheap” to that, but he’s still in the process of learning that money cannot buy the most valuable things. You have been such a blessing to Daniel and to our entire family this year. It has been several years since we have had such a smooth school year and a teacher who consistently looked for and found Daniel’s positive qualities. Thank you for loving our child and letting him know it! Long after Daniel has forgotten exactly what he learned in sixth grade, we will all remember how you accepted him, celebrated his uniqueness, and expected his personal best from him. Thank you, Gayle, for your patience, understanding, wisdom, and most of all, your love that “bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, and endures all things!” You have set a shining example for your colleagues, your students, and their families. We are eternally grateful to God for putting our child in your path. Sincerely, Dalene Even if I were not a teacher myself, I would still be grateful to Gayle for the difference she made in our family’s life. After all, a teacher’s influence is felt far beyond the classroom and reaches into a student’s home life as well as his future. David Wilkinson, executive director of Associated Baptist Press, pays this tribute to public school teachers in his article, “Heroes Disguised as Teachers”: Someday when I’m standing in one of the long lines outside the Pearly Gates awaiting admission, I won’t be a bit surprised to see a much shorter line of VIPs who are being welcomed with streamlined expediting and lots of fanfare. When I finally get within sight of the reserved gate through which these persons have been joyfully passing, I expect to see a bright, neon sign flashing overhead that reads, “Special Admission: Public-School Teachers Only.” As spring prepares to give way to summer and Melanie and I trek from Waco, Texas, to Boston to celebrate our younger child’s graduation from college, there are plenty of reasons for

thanksgiving. Somewhere near the top of that list is a group of very special people—the women and men who shaped the lives of our two children as their public-school teachers in Louisville, Atlanta, and Fort Worth. All great teachers—and even average teachers—deserve recognition and support. But in my books the real heroes are those teachers who give their best every year to the children in our communities’ public schools. And among those heroes are followers of Jesus whose lives of service and sacrifice give witness to the God who loves all children. . . . There is plenty that is broken in our nation’s public-school system—and in our homes and neighborhoods. And, yes, there are plenty of teachers who are contributors to the flaws and failures of that system. But amid all that’s broken and flawed stand scores of heroes disguised as teachers. I have no desire to blindly confer sainthood on publicschool teachers. Nor do I wish to question the intentions of those Christian teachers who have opted for careers in private schools or to judge the motives of Christian parents who have the resources to send their children to private schools or to opt for home-schooling. There is good being done in lots of places by committed Christian teachers. But when Meredith walks across the stage to receive her bachelor’s degree on Saturday, I’m going to breathe a quiet prayer of gratitude for the Christian women and men who serve as public school teachers in America. And, while I hope I won’t be queuing up outside the Pearly Gates anytime soon, when the time comes I’m going to be on the lookout for that neon sign welcoming a special group of heroes.1

Signals for Help It doesn’t take a hero to figure out that students are facing personal problems. I ask my students on the first day of school to let me know on the back of their informational index cards if there is something I need to know about them to help me teach them better. This gives them the opportunity to inform me about physical

or emotional issues that may affect their ability to concentrate and learn: anger management issues, problems with their home situation, ADD, allergies, seizures, etc. Often it is a couple of weeks before the resource teachers, guidance, and/or the school nurse have a chance to inform teachers about these challenges, and it may prove helpful or important to know prior to that. For example, if a student’s family cannot afford school supplies, give the students an opportunity to explain in private on paper what their needs are so you can find assistance. After reading several students’ notes, I went to our “Lost and Found” department, and with the help of our wonderful Mrs. B, the “Copy Lady,” and Mrs. P, our resourceful history teacher, furnished notebooks and dividers from perfectly good supplies left behind in lockers the year before. When a student’s material needs are greater than what you can find or furnish, ask for help from the guidance department, the administration, your church, or community charity organizations. Better yet, start noting the sale dates for school supplies and stock up on essentials when they are rock bottom prices. In our area, these sales happen the first weekend in August and again just before Labor Day. With a little foresight, it is quite possible to equip several students with essentials such as pens, notebooks, and paper for a very small investment.

Bigger Needs Signals of distress may come in a variety of ways and may even overwhelm you at times with the needs that are unmet. For example, when Faye asked to go to the nurse because she didn’t feel well, a couple of questions revealed the real reason behind her shakiness and dizziness. She told me she had taken a few sips from a friend’s energy drink that morning and now her heart was racing and her head felt woozy. After I lectured her about how unhealthy those “energy” drinks really are, she made a statement that stunned me and got to the real heart of the matter. “I don’t think the energy drink would have bothered me if I had food on my stomach. But we don’t have any food in the house.”

It was a rush, but in the next two hours, I was able to purchase a meal from the cafeteria for Faye, deliver it to the nurse’s office where she was resting and trying to get over her “dizzy spell,” and make the principal aware of her need. We found that Faye and her family had not filled out the necessary paperwork for free breakfast and lunch, but she was certainly qualified. Now her physical needs are cared for on a regular basis at school. Even better, Faye now helps me and another teacher twice weekly after school to make a little extra money for gas and groceries. She is by far the best assistant I have ever had, working quickly and efficiently to help me with filing, typing, labeling, errands, and organization. I am always amazed at how God can not only use us to help meet the needs of others, but also how often we get back much more than we give in the process.

More than Just a Poem Gregory was another student crying for help. He mentioned to me how unhappy he was because no girls liked him, and he thought he was ugly. Gregory even told his classmates and me about several suicide attempts he had made. Thankfully, God gave me just the right way and opportunity to encourage Gregory. First, he was able to write down his feelings in a poem. He read the poem to his peers and received support for the courage it took to do so. We sent the poem to ENCOUNTER—the Magazine, a weekly magazine for teens published by Standard Publishing. Gregory was the first student from our high school to have his work published in that magazine, and as far as I know, he was the first to receive a paycheck for his writing. That affirmation bolstered Gregory’s confidence. He shared the poem with his pastor who ended up using it in a sermon one Sunday morning. All these events had a wonderful domino effect, and the end result was that Gregory began to smile, care more for his appearance, have more confidence, and talk in positive ways. In fact, Gregory told me a year later that getting published helped save his life. He no longer contemplated suicide when he achieved that measure of success and affirmation. By the way, though it does not matter, Gregory was a resource stu-

dent with learning disabilities. What does matter is that he now concentrates on his ability rather than his disability. Since that time, ENCOUNTER—the Magazine has published and paid more than eighty teen authors from our school. Because it is a Christian magazine distributed in Sunday School classes all over the United States, I always provide a variety of options for the students to choose from when sending their work for publication. However, many of them choose ENCOUNTER. This provides a double blessing and opportunity for bringing Christ into the classroom and celebrating teenage published authors. Brent is a student who wrote about his struggle with his weight: To: Dalene Parker Subject: The day has come! Hello Mrs. Parker: I just wanted to write to you and tell you that my ENCOUNTER magazines have finally arrived! I’m so thrilled! I look back on the day and remember sitting at your desk getting your help and just soaking up all the knowledge you have passed on to me! I would love to come by and give you a copy. If this is possible, please let me know. Thanks so much for being a great role model and a great teacher who has inspired me to stay strong in my walk with Christ and to keep my head up, no matter what. Thank you! Of course, hearing from Brent was thrilling, but I was even more delighted when he agreed to come share his published writing with my current students. He was also able to clue them in about college life and how to prepare. Former students are a valuable resource in the classroom. As an English teacher, my writing prompts seem to generate fodder for revealing dreams, hopes, disappointments, and faith— or absence thereof. When a student writes freely about God, I always take the opportunity to praise and encourage him or her privately or in front of peers as seems appropriate. Then, when the

opportunity presents itself, I help edit, demonstrate the correct procedure for submitting a manuscript, and provide the guidelines. Often, this requires an after-school or lunch appointment, since I rarely spend class time for this purpose. However, most students are eager enough to see their work in print—or to get that paycheck—that they will put in the extra time. Of course, that also provides an extra opportunity to hear what a student thinks or feels and encourage him or her along the right path. For students who express lack of faith or serious questions about the existence of God in their lives, prayerful petitions are always in order, even if a word is never spoken.

From Pain to Peace Jordan, a senior from my school, is another teen author published with ENCOUNTER—the Magazine. Jordan surprised me this Christmas with a gift more precious than any amount of money could have purchased; she gave me a journal filled with her writings from the past year. In it, she expresses the anguish of losing her boyfriend in an accident and her effort to climb out of the pit of despair. Notice the progression from pain to peace. Bottomless Helplessness She’s hurting. All the time she feels alone. For her, all hope seems to be lost. This girl was once happy and carefree, but now she’s scared and depressed. She used to hang out with friends and spend time with her family. Now she keeps to herself and hardly ever lets anyone in. Depression engulfs her. Friends and family try to help her. She’s alone. She doesn’t want help, because she feels as if nothing or no one can save her from this bottomless pit of helplessness.

Distractions I feel as if the angels have turned their backs on me. In these dark times I try to work through my issues, but the fireflies distract me. They remind me of the never-ending passion I once felt. This passion is gone, but also unforgettable. It’s sad to have known someone and know that a final word was never spoken. Turning the pages to this new life is hard—a life without him where my memories are fading each day. I want to remember everything. Every moment. Every touch. Every time when his lips caressed mine. All of these events were habits for us. Habits that no longer remain a part of my life. Just a memory that will soon be long forgotten. Please Hear What I’m Not Saying You know what I’ve been through and you’ve experienced it too. I want to talk. I want you to listen. But every time I start to say the words that might help me break through this depression, I feel weak, alone, and restless. These words I’ve been trying to speak for months are stuck deep inside where I keep fighting the rolling tide. It’s so hard to keep going. To see through the tearfilled river that keeps flowing. Unseen Angel On this bench, beside this tree Sit two friends. One seen. One unseen. They laugh and talk about all the good times they’ve had. But as the sun starts to sink over the water, they cry. Remembering that dreadful day brings tears to their eyes. It was the day a friend became an unseen angel. His soul was not given to the devil. It went to heaven where joy is all that’s given.

On this bench, beside this tree Truth and understanding now belong to me. Dear Mrs. Parker, I want to thank you for everything you have taught me within the past three years. You have helped me grow not only in my writing but also as an individual. I love your class, and I’m going to miss it next year. Thank you for helping me realize that what I have to say is important and deserves to be heard. You told me that my piece “Unseen Angels” spoke volumes when I read it in the auditorium. Well, I wouldn’t have been able to set aside my fears and insecurities if you hadn’t made me do Open Mic. I appreciate everything you’ve done. You made me a stronger person by teaching me to write the way I do. My past experience with losing Kenny has also made me stronger. I miss him every day. And those first couple of months back at school were hard for me. Without the help of friends and you, I don’t think I could have made it through this semester. By the grace of God, we’ve all been able to go on with our lives and not dwell on the past. We’ve been able to move on, cherishing our memories of Kenny while he was here. Once again, I want to thank you for everything. I’ll make sure to come back and visit you. Sincerely, Jordan Father, help me sense when and how to help my students far beyond their academic needs. I want them to see your compassion and your love through me. May they come to know you as the source of all their provisions and the answer to all their problems.

SALT SHAKERS My Bobby Shout for joy to the Lord, all the earth . . . Know that the Lord is

God. It is he who made us, and we are his; we are his people, the sheep of his pasture . . . Praise his name . . . For the Lord is good and his love endures forever. —Psalm 100:1, 3-5

Her note tugged at my heart. The teacher felt it necessary to let other teachers know the student in her room had a special need. She could have just typed in his name, “Bobby.” She could have identified him as just “a student in my room, Bobby,” but she didn’t. She called him “my Bobby.” She claimed him as belonging to her. He wasn’t perfect; there were issues, but he belonged to her. Isn’t that the way our Father loves us? He loves us just for who we are—His children—with all our shortcomings, faults, errors, weaknesses. He still claims us. Father, give me the strength and patience to be more like you every day. Help me to love others as they are. Period.

Have a belonging-filled day!

FIVE

LEARNING TO SHINE CO M PE T EN CE / CO N F IDEN CE Such confidence as this is ours through Christ before God. Not that we are competent in ourselves to claim anything for ourselves, but our competence comes from God. —2 Corinthians 3:4-5

Risky Business What was I thinking! Although I knew our tight school budget would make it difficult to secure one of those six-thousand-dollar speakers for our opening assembly, I had no business opening my mouth and offering to provide the keynote at no charge. Who did I think I was, anyway? Was my penchant for spontaneity moving ahead of my occasional predilection for good sense? Or is it because I tend to agree with Francis Chan’s intentional risk-taking when it comes to serving God? Chan says he deliberately puts himself in scary situations where God has to come through.1 Although I’m not one to call attention to myself, when I have something important to say or see a way I could offer assistance or service, I take great delight in doing so. However, it’s still really scary, and I often wonder what I got myself into. As it turned out, the “Risky Business” presentation went very well, and I received positive affirmation. Most likely it was because I included spectacular pictures of a recent trip to Oregon with my children. No doubt, the faculty and staff, just back from their tooshort summer, enjoyed participating in one last vicarious vacation before we began our school year. However, more than the pleasure of viewing stunning panoramas, I felt God had a message for me to deliver regarding how we

teach and interact with our at-risk students. The pictures I took helped connect an out-of-school experience with an in-school one, bringing the “real world” into the classroom, so to speak. In a couple of places I was able to insert symbolic representations of faith. To be sure, I know the reason this presentation was successful was not because of me, but because God prompted me to offer my services, the district administration accepted, my prayer partners covered me, and our media specialist, Sheila Oliver, made certain I was prepared. She insisted I rehearse, checked my timing and my content, and made sure the technology and equipment functioned faultlessly. In other words, God provided the opportunity and the support; I simply obeyed. Was I scared? Absolutely. There were hundreds of people in that audience, most of them my peers, some of them my bosses. Was this too hard for me, requiring that God come through if it was to be successful? Yes, of course. After all, I tend to stumble to the point of embarrassment when I attempt to do anything in my own power. But God had prepared me for this opportunity through some training in seminars and Proverbs 31 “She Speaks” conferences. Through the years, He has allowed me to experience enough successes to remind me that He provides the confidence and competence required to help us shine for His glory. Truly, His glory needs to be the only motivation behind any act of service, public or private. If we seek only to put ourselves in the spotlight, the results may be temporarily satisfying but eternally devoid of meaning and purpose. Who wants that? According to my earnest expectation and my hope, that in nothing I shall be ashamed, but that with all boldness, as always, so now also Christ shall be magnified in my body, whether it be by life or by death. —Philippians 1:20

Open Mic In the same way I have learned to challenge myself to offer public presentations, even when they make me nervous, I also chal-

lenge my students to get comfortable with presenting in front of their peers and eventually other audiences as well. Open Mic is a common practice in my classroom. Some students don’t mind at all, but others need great encouragement. Of course, I want them all to shine and be confident and competent in presenting their ideas. An extremely shy student who called herself JAWS was considering taking the Creative Writing class. She received these encouragements from current students, which provided her with firsthand knowledge of what she could expect, particularly related to Open Mic: Dear JAWS, Creative Writing is not an easy course, especially for those who don’t have exceptional writing skills already. Every day is a new prompt, new activities, new challenges. It’s definitely not one of those structured classes where every day is the same. Mrs. Parker comes to class with the hopes of giving us a fun class designed for expression, but also a place to learn and grow. For those who love to write and learn, personal and academic growth is inevitable. Creative Writing will look great on a college application. How many teenagers can say they are published authors? Plus, Mrs. Parker will teach you how to write college essays, and she will impart her analytical skills, along with basic principles of grammar. These are essential for college. When you write that essay for your application, and all the research papers that follow, you will still be using the skills that Mrs. Parker taught you. Not many classes can promise that, but what you learn here will follow you. There is one aspect of the class that everyone fears at first. Before you toss this letter into the nearest recycle bin, please consider my story. I was the shyest in the class. When I stood in front of everyone to read a poem or an excerpt from an essay, I froze, my voice shook, and I trembled. It was something I dreaded. Slowly, I became comfortable with this group of people to the point that my panic attacks ended. I can’t tell

you that you will like the people you read to, but you will learn more about them and see all their layers. I guarantee that if you decide to take Creative Writing, you will never see other people or yourself the same. Yours truly, Courtney H.

Gaining Confidence In spite of her previous reluctance to read in front of others, Courtney was the first to read her work at our closing ceremony, and she was one of the most profound writers to share her thoughts. She already had the competence; she just needed the confidence. Courtney later went on to emcee an event for an audience of 300. God was definitely at work in the confidence and competence arena. Danielle L., our Writer of the Year last year, had this to say to JAWS about the process of gaining confidence through Open Mic: Another thing about this class is that we’re extremely deep. This semester many of us have grown close through our writing and sharing experiences about our lives. We’re like our own little family that no one can hurt. You don’t get laughed at or made fun of, just lots of tissues and giggles. Open Mic is how we express ourselves, which may sound scary, but it’s not. I was surprised at how scared I and many others were of public speaking. We had a few students who wanted us to turn around, close our eyes, or shut off the lights before they spoke. Mrs. Parker is open to anything that will make you more comfortable. So don’t be afraid; just join us. I promise this will be the ride of your life as well as a good way to make friends. Sincerely, Danielle L.

Insistence vs. Resistance I have had enough former students return to thank me for making them participate in Open Mic that I know it is a prac-

tice worth keeping. They find it extremely helpful when they take public speaking courses in college or give presentations at work. I’ll never forget a young man named Brandon who approached our first Open Mic day with such trepidation that he thought he would throw up. I assured him that for his first time, all he had to say were four words: “I hate Open Mic.” Then he could sit down. “I think I can say those four words, but I’m still going to throw up.” “Then, instead of sitting down after your Open Mic, why don’t you just step outside the classroom and breathe deeply and collect yourself? That way, if you really need to throw up, you’re already on your way to the bathroom.” “Okay, I’ll try,” he answered. To my delight, each week’s Open Mic found Brandon just a little more confident and a little more willing to add one more sentence to each presentation. By the end of the semester, I actually had to set a timer to keep him from going over his allotted minutes! Brandon grew in confidence and competence because he practiced. My insistence gradually overcame his resistance.

A Different Kind of Siren Model for your students the risks you are willing to take that might make you look or feel foolish but will result in improved performance. For example, I signed up for voice lessons one semester because I really wanted to learn how to project my voice and to control some of the warbling it did when I tried to sing loudly. My instructor made me practice the most embarrassing sounds at the top of my voice. My least favorite was the ambulance sound where I had to issue an ear-piercing siren with a crescendo in volume as it rose in pitch. But the more I practiced it, the less self-conscious I grew and now as I drive to school, I sometimes belt out the ambulance sound to warm up my voice for the day. However, I do try to make sure there is no heavy traffic around. I would hate for cars to collide as they try to get out of my way!

Booster Shots of Confidence It’s easy to believe I’ve been called to teach on the days when students come prepared, want to learn, and participate in a meaningful way. Yet how often does that really happen? It’s easy to affirm my competence and confidence as an instructor when the majority of the class finally gets it after a particularly challenging assignment. Yet how long does that usually take? It’s gratifying to hear words like, “This is fun. I love this class.” However, that happens only occasionally, not consistently. Consequently, it is hard to sustain my enthusiasm for teaching without a booster shot now and then. I know several teachers who keep a box or file of encouraging notes from students, parents, colleagues, and administrators who have noticed and expressed gratitude for their hard work and concern. I have a collection of mugs, jewelry, pictures, handcrafted mementos, and letter openers from appreciative students or their parents. These make me smile even years after the giver has gone from my classroom. Sometimes, though, I still need reminders that what I do is worthwhile. One day I rounded the corner of the hallway after a quick bathroom break and nearly bumped into our state teacher of the year. She had come as a guest speaker to encourage students interested in becoming future educators. We spoke, exchanged pleasantries, and went our separate ways. Later, I commended the guidance counselor who had invited her, saying how nice it was to have that kind of influence on our campus. Although her response was certainly not intended to be hurtful, the last sentence stung like a slap across the face: “I’m glad she could be here with us. She says she’s going back into the classroom after serving as state teacher of the year. But I don’t believe she will. She’s too good to stay in the classroom.” Too good to stay in the classroom? Does that mean I’m not any good if I choose to stay? Does it mean those who don’t move up to higher positions are left behind because they can’t do better? After I shared my hurt with Carolynn, my trusted colleague, she put things back into proper perspective for me and answered my question: “Of

course not. What would happen if all the good teachers left the classroom? That’s where we need the brightest and the best.”

Re-search Still, it is hard to feel like the brightest and the best when the work our students submit after weeks of intense training seems so far from the polished, professional product we strive to secure. The following example came from a ninth-grade student’s third draft of his research paper. Needless to say, he will need to remember our mantra concerning the “re” in research meaning “back and again.” We will have to go back and work on this paper again and again until he gets it. But for now, please allow me to use his unedited rough draft to make a point. Tsunamis The effect of a tsunami can be the excess water creates deadly currents and sweep away people. It also does a lot of damage in the initial surge and then with standing water. It also can damage people’s houses and destroy people’s lives. I think that I learned a howl lot from just doing this power point I am so glad that I decided to do my power point on tsunamis. Know that I’ve talked about my power point let’s move on to my interview. My interview consisted of five questions and a lot of information. One of the best responses to my question about how did you fell when you saw everybody dying and asking for help. When a student’s work misses the mark, I must make a conscious choice to celebrate how far we’ve come rather than shake my head at how far we have to go. First of all, this student enjoyed his research project and found the topic fascinating. Secondly, it is obvious he did not plagiarize! At the suggestion of our media specialist, I had students “deconstruct” their research into key words and phrases as they took notes on PowerPoint slides—no cutting and pasting allowed. This method trained them to internalize the

information well enough to present it orally in their own words and prevented plagiarism. However, the biggest challenge came in reconstructing those key words and phrases back into meaningful, coherent sentences, still giving credit for the origin of the information without losing the intended meaning. Even in its rough stages, Justin’s research is teaching me something new, not only about tsunamis but also about the analogies to be drawn between tsunamis and teaching! Let’s look at a few key phrases in Justin’s paper:

Initial Surge At the beginning of our teaching careers, or after a long restful break, teachers usually experience an initial surge of enthusiasm and hope that this new semester or new school year will go better than the last. Whether it’s a fresh start with new students, innovative methods and materials, or a different administration, every year we begin with zest and zeal. A few weeks later, however, many teachers are already burned out. Why can’t the initial surge continue? Perhaps it’s because we get caught in the standing water, the places where mold, mildew, and disease begin to multiply. Maybe we don’t get enough rest. Maybe we listen to or participate in gossip. Maybe something in our personal lives has been hit by what seemed like a tsunami. Maybe we become acutely aware of the damage to people’s houses and the damage to people’s lives directly affecting the students we teach. Within the space of a few weeks, it is quite possible that we will directly or indirectly learn about a student whose mother died, whose daddy went to jail, whose family members were killed in a house fire, whose infection turned into staph, whose pregnancy test came out positive, whose uncle died of cancer, and so on. Hearing Their Howls Obviously, educators deal with much more than just the challenge of helping children learn the mandates of state standards. On a daily basis, the unwritten curriculum includes learning how

to handle broken family relationships, bullying issues, social skills, organizational methods, study skills, grief counseling, physical illness, emotional instability. When Justin stated that he learned a howl lot, it made me want to howl a lot too! But more than that, it helped me remember that our students need us to hear their howls and sometimes even their silent cries for help. It’s a heavy responsibility, but it is also an awesome privilege and opportunity. We must believe in our calling to teach, to believe in their ability to learn—not only about our particular subject matter, but also about life. We must maintain our competence and our confidence in our calling to stay in the classroom and help them prepare for and survive the tsunamis that will come. Dommenique is a student who has survived several severe storms in her lifetime.

Unanswered Questions Dommenique’s unedited essay asking “Why Me?” is a reminder of the kinds of questions students really need answers for. You will never find these in a book. Growing up life was hard. I didn’t have a mama to run to when I scraped my knee or a daddy to tuck me in at night. But Cannyn will. Instead I had the Village, a foster home in New York. I used to cry every night. Wondering why me. Why my mama had to be a crake head and pick a drug over me. Why she had to leave me in the hospital, a pure infant? I’ve never done anything to her. Why did she try to sell me when I got a little older for little to nothing? Why my daddy had to be in and out of jail always on drugs? Why couldn’t he get himself right to save me? Not just him but anybody. Why didn’t my family want to save me? Why did I have to live like this? WHY! WHY ME! No matter how much I used to cry and ask why, only God knows why. This is what made me who I am today. A strong, determined mother.

Looking back on asking why was just the little girl in me, but no matter how hard I had it somebody out there got it worst then me. So this Christmas just pray for them. Cause you never know if they’re asking why. Dommenique’s experiences have shaped her whys into how to prevent her son from going through the same kind of rejection and neglect she faced as a child. For a teenage mother, she is incredibly mature and focused. She has also used her experiences, both past and present, to influence other teens to think seriously about the consequences of their actions and their readiness for responsibility. After all, the most effective teachers in the classroom are often the students themselves. Give your students the opportunity to share what they have learned about life. As a Christian teacher, you can applaud those whose choices reflect wisdom and morals. You may also choose to share your own experiences when appropriate.

Asking for Help Justin’s last interview question from his primary source is of primary importance to Christian teachers in public schools: “How did you ‘fell’ when you saw everybody dying and asking for help?” I would feel that I failed if I missed an opportunity initiated by a student to share my reason for hope, my source of confidence, and my motivation for competence. God means for us to be in the classroom. He means for us to minister to the students who have been hurt as well as to prepare them for what is ahead. Sometimes that means being transparent and vulnerable ourselves. One young man, who researched the topic of depression, stated that it was hard for people who had not experienced depression to understand it in others. When I assured him that my family members and I had experienced struggles with depression, he seemed startled and then amazed. “But that doesn’t seem possible, Mrs. Parker. You’re so positive all the time.”

That was my cue to give credit where credit was due. “I have the Lord Jesus Christ as my Savior. With His help, I can handle anything that comes along.” I took that opportunity to speak truth and hope into a student’s life. Drawing yet another analogy from Justin’s research, I know what it feels like to spend some time in “standing water.” But I also know how to point drowning students to the Lifeboat. So do some students. Justin may have had difficulty with his research paper, but he certainly has a clear grasp on what really matters in life. In a poem describing himself, he writes: I am a kid who walks tall in this world And only wants to do for others. I am a person who tries to follow the golden rules. I know that’s what God would want me to do. I am a person who shows people they need to get right with God.

Teachers of Influence Just as Justin recognized in himself qualities that would honor God, students recognize characteristics that Christian teachers should have in common. Some of these are evident in the essays below that describe teachers who have had a positive impact on their students. Striving for Perfection The teacher who has had the most influence on me to make me better is my coach and global studies teacher, Mrs. Peeler. She has done nothing but pick on me and yell at me from the moment I met her. That woman is just plain crazy. But you’ve got to love and respect her. My sisters played volleyball for her. And now I do. She really pushed me in a way nobody else has. She yells and pushes, and I love it. I know she wants the best for me. She wants me to be better. Good is not good enough for her. As a matter of fact, great isn’t enough. She makes me want to strive for perfection, and I admire her for that.

The way she does that, though, just drives me insane. She will yell and make me push myself beyond what I thought I could do. In the classroom when I’m slacking, all she has to do is give me the evil eye and it works. It’s like she can read my thoughts sometimes—like when I don’t want to do anything she’ll know it. She is a strong Christian woman who has my full respect, although she may not know it. I love her like I love anybody who wants the best for me. And I truly do admire her. When I grow up, I want to be something like her. Angela A. Promoting Patriotism I have had so many teachers throughout my life. All of them have been great help to me with my assignments. Thanks to my teachers in the past, I’m where I am now. My favorite teacher is Coach B. He is a really great guy. His attitude toward us as students is so much different than most teachers’ attitudes. What really impresses me is how he may get irritated with us, but he never loses his cool. He is such a level-headed person. I love the way he presents the material in a way that makes it easy for me as a student to understand. In my opinion, he is the best teacher my school has. I have so much respect for him, not only because he is an all-around great guy, but because he is in the military. He has actually been overseas and fought for our freedom in Iraq. It takes a real man to be able to go overseas and put his life on the line and come back home and try to give us an education. Coach B. is helping to make a better future for us in two ways: he is making our lives safer and helping my classmates and me build a foundation for our future. These are just a few reasons why Coach B. is my favorite teacher. He really encouraged me and leads me to believe I can fulfill my dreams. Thanks, Coach B. Charlie C.

Making More than Music Education, discipline, and respect make the person who will never steer me in the wrong direction the best teacher ever. He’s the band director at my high school and an All Star in my book. All the funny jokes and all the times of being serious, I can definitely say that he will always be in my heart forever. Mr. V. has changed the way I present myself. By listening more in class, being more respectful to elders and my fellow students, even appreciating and being thankful for everything I have, I’ve learned these aspects from Mr. V. He always gives me the utmost respect and will never let me down. I know for a fact if there’s anything I need, he would be the first person jumping up asking what he can do. I never thought I would love a teacher as much as I love this man. He’s not only my teacher, but he’s one of my best friends. He’s like a father to me. Thank you, Mr. V., for all the hard work you put in to help me better myself in band. Without you, I would still be playing sixth-grade music. Jasmine Dodd

A Push When My Feet Stood Still My current students help me realize how valuable their Christian mentors have been. Jean Marie, a senior who recently delivered her second child, had this to say about her guidance counselor: I don’t think people truly realize just how important a counselor can be to a child’s life. To tell the truth, they are much of the strength behind a student. Through my years in high school I’ve made a friend in my guidance counselor, Ms. Campbell. She has given me hope when I needed it and a push when my feet stood still. I remember walking into her office every school day afternoon, pouring out my problems as she patiently listened. It was obvious she walked with Christ. I believe she was one of God’s fingers gently pointing me in the right direction when I needed it.

Ms. Campbell wasn’t always the person I wanted to see at the end of the day, but I know without her I would have had things much harder. Without her, I may not have reached my senior year.

Even When I Don’t Feel Like It Angelica expresses her gratitude to her math teacher, Jessica F.: A teacher who has inspired me is Jessica F. She was my algebra and geometry teacher. She is a very nice, cool, and responsible person. By showing me how to be respectful and nice toward other people, even when I don’t feel like it, she inspired me to be a better person. Her influences come from being a Christian. The way she helps students or anybody else and also the way she acts toward others let me know she walks with Jesus Christ. Father, help us always remember that you are the source of our confidence and competence. You are the light from which we draw our illumination. With your help we can follow your command to “Let your light so shine before men, that they may see your good works, and glorify your Father which is in heaven” (Matthew 5:16 KJV).

SALT SHAKERS The Catch That is why, for Christ’s sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong. —2 Corinthians 12:10

My life, like most of yours, is marred with mistakes, tribulations, heartaches, and shortcomings. And it is through such hard times I have come to know our Savior best. He does not always give me what I want, but He does give me what I need. And it all starts with a dependency on a relationship with Him. It is a must

for our survival. To be dependent on God means to relinquish the driver’s seat and trust Him to provide love, care, guidance, and protection in the days ahead. There is much I do not understand, many questions to be answered, issues to be resolved, but thanksgiving to God is still in order. I know that He is still here and involved in every detail of my life. Although I do not know what the day will hold or what sudden turns and twists it might take, I do know who holds the day and me. And that my friend, will suffice. Have a believing-filled day!

SIX

LEARNING TO WORK W H AT E V ER YOU DO Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for men. —Colossians 3:23

Procrastinator’s Paradise No More The compliment came as a complete surprise. Dr. Short and I were discussing my spring schedule. When he learned that I teach four classes a day before driving eighty miles round-trip to attend my doctoral grad class in the afternoon three times a week, then go home to take care of family and try to work on this book, he said some words I have never heard addressed to or about me before: “We need to get you to come speak to our undergraduates about time management. They have such a hard time realizing how to squeeze everything in.” I waited until I got in my car a few minutes later before I allowed myself to chuckle. All my life I have had a problem with time management. I could have been the poster child for Procrastinator’s Paradise. In high school, the office ladies who issued my tardy passes actually began calling me Da-late instead of Da-lene. Remember the good old days of home economics? I still recall the sewing project in my tailoring class that required me to sprint home two blocks at lunchtime in order to have my mom help me iron one leg of the lined slacks I was supposed to model that day while I tried to hem the other. I was notoriously and consistently late. When I was in college, I rarely began my essays or projects until the night before they were due. One time when my electric

typewriter was on the blink, my professor allowed me to use her office typewriter in the evening, only to have to pry my slumbering form off of it the next morning when she walked in to prepare for her eight o’clock class. Often I would not even get started on a paper until midnight—after an “energy” run to Dunkin’ Donuts, which at that time was twenty miles away from the little mountain college I attended and one of the few options for students seeking a sugar kick in the middle of the night. As soon as I realized my paper or project was just not going to come together in time, I redirected my energy toward creative enterprises and ended up offering an excuse-laden poem—or a pumpkin pie—to my bemused professor. Does that mean I have high tolerance for the students in my classes who struggle with meeting deadlines or offer creative excuses? No! Instead, because of my shortfalls as a student and the bad habits that ensued, I fiercely demand my students meet their deadlines and offer no excuses. Yes, I know that seems hypocritical. Yet I know the stakes are higher for them in terms of scholarship and job competition. They truly cannot afford to be lackadaisical. However, I will confess that I do allow students to re-do one failing grade per quarter with a help session, because I know life can be messy and haphazard at times. When students protest about daily and weekend homework or having to work so hard, I quote my teacher friend Lisa Rode-Foster: “You can hate me now and thank me later.” Then I point to a poster on the wall above me that proclaims Benjamin Franklin’s convicting adage: “He who is good for making excuses is seldom good for anything else.” Ouch!

The Pendulum Swings It did not take long in the teaching world for me to realize procrastination simply is not conducive to survival in the classroom. Maybe as a latent attempt at remedying my dilatory habits from high school, I made a practice for many years of arriving early and staying late. In fact, the pendulum swung too far toward hard work and I became far too consumed by my job. Burnout became

inevitable less than two years into my first teaching job, and I found myself ready to quit from pure exhaustion. I was only in my twenties! Gradually, I learned to reduce the assignments requiring afterhours grading—sometime eighteen or more hours per assignment—and I learned to pay attention to voicemail like the ones that follow, which I still have saved on my phone: From my husband, Pat: “Dalene, It’s seven o’clock. I got us a little something for supper and just wondered when you would be coming. Give me a call.” From my friend Pam calling from the parking lot: “Dalene, get yourself out of the building. I promise you it will be here tomorrow.” There were others, but they all said basically the same thing: “Go home!” Consequently, for Dr. Short to make such a comment about my ability to manage time gave me reason to pause and thank the Lord for answering my longstanding prayer: Lord, please help me become more effective and efficient. Help me prioritize the responsibilities in my life your way. Help me not neglect the important while attending to the urgent. Ironically, this answer to prayer comes during a time when my schedule is actually heavier than it has ever been. Yet, because of the tight time constraints and the blessing of a flexible schedule this year, I actually arrive home sooner after traveling eighty miles round-trip to attend my grad classes than I did when I just stayed late hours at school. Thank you, Jesus.

Take Care of Yourself Does any of this sound familiar to you? At the beginning of this chapter you may have thought I would be advising teachers to work harder or longer. Or maybe you expected a list of innovative ways to reach and teach your students. In previous positions, I have known some I considered slackers who really did not earn their pay and were simply biding their time until retirement. However, by far the vast majority of teachers should be commended for their hard work and also be reminded to take care of them-

selves and their families. I keep the following reminder from an unknown source on the wall in front of my desk:

SIX TIPS FOR THE WORKAHOLIC 1. Care for yourself: Eat properly, get enough sleep, and exercise regularly. Do what you can so that you are healthy, both mentally and physically. 2. Cut Your Hours: Be organized, but do not let your schedule run your life. Also, try to limit yourself to working eight hours a day—and not a minute more. 3. Draw the Line: When you are already overloaded and need more personal time, do not take on other projects. You will only be causing yourself more stress. 4. Learn to Delegate: Let others share the load—you don’t have to do everything yourself. You will have more energy and the end result will be better for everyone. 5. Slow Down: Make a conscious effort to eat, talk, walk, and drive more slowly. Give yourself extra time to get to appointments so you are not always rushing. 6. Take Breaks: Take frequent work breaks. Short walks or meditating for a few minutes can help you unwind and clear your head. Try to schedule short breaks in the midst of your teaching. Plan for ten- or fifteen-minute intervals in which you instruct the students to work independently, and make it clear they should ask no questions during that period. It might be wise to circulate once or twice around the room to make sure each student is on-task, but then go back to your desk or podium and take a mental or physical break. I find that I often stay in high gear and on my feet the entire day. I end up needing an hour or more to wind down and another hour or more to answer all the e-mail and attend to the myriad tasks required of a teacher. But if I respond to a couple of e-mail or write out a homebound assignment during the students’ independent working time, I won’t be so far behind at the end of the day.

Setting a timer helps me with this effort and keeps the students more on-task as well. I also award an “Effort and Attitude” grade once every three weeks or so based on how well the students follow directions, give a solid effort, and keep a positive attitude. I want my own “Effort and Attitude” grade to be an A as well. The following anecdote by Marie Fraley Duncan, a star teacher and family therapist, makes clear what really matters in terms of effort and attitude: Worried about meeting the standards of higher test scores, I often overstressed and pushed my students to soak up those missing bits of skills around Easter. One particular spring I found myself once again wrapped up in harvesting multiple new strategies to make sure all my students were up to par for the annual task—until a young boy taught me a lesson. Dakota was a sweet-spirited student who struggled to read on grade level and creatively avoided my innovative, engaging instructional techniques by choosing bathroom breaks during language arts activities. I took pride in the work I did as a teacher and enjoyed the community’s respect as a strong instructor of first graders. All my students would learn to read! Dakota’s resistance to learning to read became a strong source of irritation and left me increasingly exasperated the closer standardized testing approached. One morning, Dakota beamed like an angel as he tip-toed up to my desk during the few minutes of silent reading. “I have something exciting to tell you,” he whispered. “What is it, Dakota?” “Mrs. Duncan, I got saved yesterday at church. I asked Jesus to come live in my heart forever and ever.” At first, I was uncertain of the words I had just heard. As I slowly absorbed the joy abundantly displayed on this angelic seven-year-old’s face, I processed Dakota’s meaning. I found my heartbeat increased, causing me to gasp for air for a brief second. This was not what I had expected to hear while my energies were set on how to do my job. My eyes started to well up as I comprehended the significance of Dakota’s words. A

wave of calm flowed through me as I gave this precious child of God a hug. “Dakota, I am so happy for you. Now I know we will both be in heaven. God is so good, isn’t He?” “I just couldn’t wait to tell you, Mrs. Duncan.” I now recognize that I would much rather my students spend eternity in heaven than score off the charts on their standardized testing. I knew I had more than done my job and provided every opportunity for my students to succeed. The rest was under God’s control. Thank you, Lord, for clarifying my priorities and providing a much needed attitude adjustment. Since that moment, I have been able to put student learning in a more appropriate perspective. It is also a lot easier to teach after stepping off my own ego roller coaster and turning the glory over to Him. Declare his glory among the nations, his marvelous deeds among all peoples. —1 Chronicles 16:24

SALT SHAKERS This Year I Will Serve wholeheartedly, as if you were serving the Lord. . . . —Ephesians 6:7

New Year’s resolutions! Do you make any? After a lot of thought I decided to pick a life verse for my resolution—Ephesians 6:7. Along with it, I added a few of the old standards—losing weight, eating healthier, and exercising—but with a new twist. I want to lose the weight of worry, fear, impatience, and anger in my life, eat and carefully digest more of the Word, and increase my spiritual exercise by getting back into Bible study. Can I stick to my resolutions this year? Left to my own efforts, probably not. I definitely need to enlist the help of a personal

trainer. I need the personal trainer who will stick with me through the easy and hard times, motivate me with love and firmness, and never give up on me. Fortunately for me, I know the perfect personal trainer: Jesus. He is always ready and available, He personally knows my weaknesses and strengths, and I know He genuinely desires what’s best for me. All it takes is my willingness to follow His precise, perfect directions. If you are interested in getting in better shape, I highly recommend Him. Because, as He reminds us: “With man this is impossible, but with God all things are possible” (Matthew 19:26). Have a wholeheartedly filled day!

SEVEN

LEARNING TO SHARE T E ACHER, N OT PRE ACHER Carry each other’s burdens, and in this way you will fulfill the law of Christ. —Galatians 6:2

Adopted Grandparents Dear Students, My memories of our time at Dillon Pointe make me smile and thank God for you—again. Your compassion, enthusiasm, and personalities were shining brightly yesterday, and that kind of light never fades. Thank you for the way you shared yourselves with the elderly. Just showing interest in them, listening to their stories, sharing your poems, singing with them, playing Checkers (and getting beaten), and making snowflakes out of pipe cleaners—these simple things made a huge difference in everyone’s day. I returned to Dillon Pointe last night to visit my mom and learned how much our visit meant to the residents. “It’s good for old people to spend time with young people,” she said. “Most of these old folks don’t get many hugs, especially not from teenagers. And, from the smiles on their faces, it looked as if the teenagers were having a good time too. By the way, I sure would like to have five more snowflakes for my Christmas tree. Those are just what I needed to fill in some bare spots.” Needless to say, Granny-Ma enjoyed getting to meet her new “grandchildren.”

I heard Jasmine comment that she couldn’t believe the residents would get so excited about making a snowflake together. None of us expected the ladies to wear them as earrings, but that was fun and showed some spunk in their personalities too. In fact, Rebecca summed it up nicely afterwards: “I was a little scared going in there at first, but it turned out to be a lot more fun than I thought it would be.” Did you know Mr. O, the man we sang Happy Birthday to, has cancer? I didn’t either. Granny-Ma said he moved here from Boston and has no immediate family in the area. Even though he didn’t say much, he did grin from ear-to-ear when we gave him a birthday bear. And what about our own Riley—the man of the hour! Who would have thought his poem “Back in the Day” would trigger such sweet and humorous responses? What a good sport he was for letting the ladies kiss his face a hundred times and sharing bear hugs in return. I could go on, but since it’s time for me to get ready for school, I’ll end by saying how proud I am to be your teacher and how grateful I am for the unselfish way you gave of your time, your money, and yourselves yesterday. Every one of you contributed something meaningful to that event and helped make a difference. I can’t wait to see the pictures Courtney’s mom and Mylo took. That way, we can relive our experience all over again. Bless you, dear ones! Love, Mrs. Parker Although our field trip to the assisted living facility required only a short-term commitment, it had far-reaching effects as evidenced by Brittany’s poem:

Adopted Grandparents The time we shared, I’ll remember forever To forget you, I promise I’ll never

You have a special place deep in my heart My adopted grandparents, we never shall part Even though you don’t know me well We’re still family above So that doesn’t stop me From giving you love Your hugs and kisses mean so much to me You all are perfect My Dillon Pointe family Brittany actually had tears in her eyes as she walked back into school following our field trip. She kept saying, “I am so happy. That was the best field trip ever! Thank you, Mrs. Parker.” It is gratifying to see students’ good qualities shine as they give of themselves in a meaningful way.

Adoption for Real Vanessa is a student in the class that visited Dillon Pointe. Grace Lewis, her adoptive mom, is a teacher at our school who shared the story of how Vanessa and her siblings came to live in the United States. Only the love of Christ could supply such commitment. Following is the summary of this family’s adoption experience and how God led them to this life-changing decision: Bob and I met rather late in life, both of us with grown children. My father was living with me, and Bob helped me take care of him. As Daddy became increasingly frail, and suffered with Alzheimer’s, he fell and broke his neck somehow, becoming paralyzed from the neck down. For Bob there was no hesitation in deciding that we could continue to care for him at home. A nursing home was out of the question. We didn’t have a good experience with a person hired to care for my dad, so I took family leave to care for him myself. He was like a helpless child, and we cared for him for nine months. He died shortly before his 90th birthday. What a man of God Bob is! Right after Daddy died, Bob’s mom had a mild stroke. She lived alone in Montgomery, Alabama, and we wanted to take

care of her. We showed her a place we could build a house for ourselves and another house right next door for her. She loved the idea. A neighbor bought her house in Montgomery, but told my mother-in-law she could live in it until her house here was ready. Within three months, we were in our new homes. Bob checked on his mother every day, and we had to move in with her temporarily when she fell and broke both wrists, but she remained mostly independent until a massive stroke took her a year and a half later. We had always talked about moving to South America after retirement to work with orphans while supporting ourselves with our retirement income. We moved to the Charleston area to be near my oldest child, and we became involved in the Brazilian community there. We almost became guardians to two sweet Brazilian girls I taught who were living with people from their church in a situation that was not good. This didn’t work out because one girl went back to Brazil and the other got married. Still, the anticipation of looking after them got us excited. One of Bob’s colleagues adopted a sibling group in Brazil around this time. That set our minds racing. We couldn’t think of anything else! We called the agency that worked with the placement of sibling groups and older children from Brazil. Our first concern was to find out if we were too old to qualify. We learned that for older children and large sibling groups—both of which have very slim odds of ever finding families—there is no age limitation. We submitted our application and within days we were sent profiles of several groups. I printed these out and knew in my heart immediately which were “my” children, but I didn’t tell Bob. I laid them all out on the table for him to study, and he immediately picked the same ones. We found a social worker who took interest in us and put a rush on our home study and helped us with paperwork. In record time— five months—we were approved and on our way to meet the kids in Brazil.

Brazilian law requires a thirty-day trial period of cohabitation before finalizing an adoption. We lived in a tiny twobedroom apartment with the five children for one month and received regular visits from a social worker, a psychologist, and our Brazilian contact from the agency. During that month we endured the hostility of the oldest two children as well as the total lack of a concept of family from all of them. This was especially true of the youngest child, who had never experienced family (not even a dysfunctional one), and showed signs of attachment disorder. While we prepared our dossier for the courts for the adoption, we read numerous books on reactive attachment disorder, adoption of older children, adoption of siblings, etc. Our eyes were wide open going in, and some of the worst things in the books never came up. Thank God. When it was time for the final audience with the judge, we didn’t know what the kids might say, but they all said they wanted to go through with it! That good news was followed by one more hectic week getting new birth certificates, medical exams, and visas—all while residing in Rio in a tiny, onebedroom apartment! The girls were still hostile and feeling like martyrs because they were giving up their own plans and freedom so the younger children could have parents. About the Children Vani (Vanessa): According to her birth certificate, Vanessa was fourteen—eleven months older than Valerie—yet she remembered being about three when Valerie was born. She was probably sixteen years old—and probably nineteen now. She had not completed the seventh grade, and she was classified as a chronic runaway, information that was not shared with us in the dossier. When she and her siblings weren’t in the orphanage, she went to school just long enough to get lunch and then escaped over the low fence to take the food to her younger brothers.

Our five children have five older siblings, all of them with police records and involvement with drugs. Their biological mother was in jail for selling drugs. When Vanessa asked an older sibling for money to buy food, she was given crack to sell. The younger children were made to deliver drugs because of their young ages and sizes that wouldn’t arouse suspicion. They even delivered drugs to their mother in prison! We offered Vanessa a chance, while we were in Brazil, to correct her birth record, but she said quite openly that she had never had a childhood, so to leave it as it was. She needed the time. Here in the States, she handled things the only way she had learned—defiantly. She got into several fights at school, had numerous discipline referrals, and narrowly escaped being sent to the alternative school. She snuck out of our home many times and ran away as well. We installed alarms on all doors and windows to keep her at home. We honestly wondered if she could make a turnaround in her life. I was at the end of my rope and felt I was losing all authority in the classroom because my students saw I had no control over my own child. It was a very trying period. She watched us like a hawk as we parented her little brothers—the two siblings she had mothered. She was very concerned about how we disciplined them, and she couldn’t let go of her need to be in control for a long time. Eventually, she accepted our relationship with them, even while she was still the wild one. Bob figured she had been treated harshly all her life, and an iron rule would not produce the desired effect. He suggested that we just overwhelm her with loving kindness, inform her of the limits and the consequences of breaking the rules, but continue to reassure her of our love. Honestly, at times I couldn’t feel that love. As Bob says, we are arrogant when we think we can obey God’s command to love; the only way we can love as God loves is to allow Him

to channel His love through us. Our own human love is far too flawed. Finally, after almost two years, Vanessa became a Daddy’s girl, wanting his approval more than anything, talking to him all the time, asking him for advice, sitting in his lap like a child, thriving under his protection and kindness. Sadly, however, she still does not comprehend or accept the love of her Heavenly Father. I noticed that in one of her poems, Vani says something about praying, but she still rejects all religion. She goes to church with us and enjoys the fellowship with the youth, but she rejects God. She claims to be an atheist, and she simply does not comprehend that our love for her, and our decision to adopt as well, are the result of our faith, without which we’d be empty nesters spending on ourselves and enjoying freedom instead of raising six more kids. Please pray for her. Valerie was thirteen. Her life had been more sheltered because an aunt took her in during the rough time before she and her siblings became wards of the state. Her hostility was more passive than Vanessa’s. She mostly kept to herself and didn’t talk or make eye contact much. Still, she had known more of protection, and when we came to the States, she started sitting in my lap for long periods of time without talking. The developmental stages a child misses must be experienced later if the child is going to heal. She still treated Bob as if she despised him. It was only after Vanessa started getting closer to him that Valerie began to see him in a different light. She has also grown close to him. Eduardo turned eleven during the cohabitation period. He seemed normal enough but wouldn’t accept affection from us. He wanted to please, and he helped me around the little apartment but kept his distance emotionally. He really looked forward to having a normal family but had no clue what that meant. He is still learning, and he is doing really well in school. He’ll soon be a ninth grader.

He has come a long way in learning about family, but still resists affection. We only get away with hugs when we disguise them as horseplay. We are looking for a breakthrough in that regard. Eduardo and Rafael still remember running away and hiding under the pool table in a shabby neighborhood bar when a social worker would try to “take them away” from home. Neither of them wanted to talk about their mother, and Eduardo still has deep anger toward her and the older ones of that household. Rafael (known by his peers as Rico) is still timid and a little afraid to lose our approval, but he beams and settles right in when invited to snuggle. He rode in my lap for the whole ten-hour bus ride from their hometown to the city where we spent our cohabitation. He was ten when we adopted him. He is very sociable and very funny. He loves having a family. Victoria was born in prison. She stayed briefly with her mother and then quickly became a ward of the state. She climbed readily into Bob’s arms when we first met in the judge’s chambers, but, unfortunately, she also went readily to any stranger who opened his arms, which was troubling. Because of lack of space, she slept with us in the little apartment, and as she has become attached to us, she hasn’t wanted to go to her own bed yet. We have allowed this, because, while she seems very self-assured in the daytime, she occasionally has night terrors and is afraid of becoming separated from us. When Victoria had been with us about eight months, she was saying her prayers before bed. She asked God to help me not do bad things and go to prison. I told her I would never do that—because I loved her—and God gave her to me so I could be her mother forever and take care of her. Her eyes opened wide. “Really?” she asked. “Really,” I promised. “Thank you, Mommy!” she said, very dramatically, with a huge sigh.

The next day she was dancing around the house singing a silly little song: “I love my mommy, I love my daddy. You are my mommy, you are my daddy!” That day was a milestone. She realized she has a “forever family” and not a temporary arrangement. She is the cuddliest of all the children and loves us fiercely—as we love her. She has a keen sense of humor and is very imaginative, irrepressibly optimistic, and upbeat. Recently, we celebrated our third “reversary”—as Victoria pronounces it. We are amazed at how much we have been blessed by these children. We still have a long way to go, but God is with us. Without a doubt! James 1:27 KJV is a verse that motivates us greatly in the last couple of chapters of this life of ours: “Pure religion and undefiled before God and the Father is this, To visit the fatherless and widows in their affliction, and to keep himself unspotted from the world.” I want also to include Ashley, a girl Vanessa discovered at her school who had a very similar beginning to Vanessa’s. As a toddler, she was found scavenging for food with her sister in a dump in New York City. Social Services eventually located Ashley’s grandmother, and she and her sister went to live with their grandparents, who moved to our area. It is unclear to us if she was actually adopted or not; there is conflict between what they say and what Ashley’s papers say. At any rate, Ashley’s home-life was really bad, and she started spending more and more time at our house. Eventually, her grandfather just kicked her out. We are her guardians now. Ironically, although Vanessa encouraged Ashley to share her problems with us and ask Bob for advice, and even asked us to take her in and let her live with us, when Ashley actually moved in, some problems developed. The kids went from embracing Ash to experiencing serious rivalry and jealousy. Vanessa and Valerie would refuse to speak to Ashley and told their brothers to shun her also. It took a month to resolve the situation. Finally, the children came to accept that we couldn’t give someone a home and then put her on the street.

We would never do that to them, and they shouldn’t ask us to do it to Ashley. There is no shortage of drama! Grace L. I am grateful to Grace for sharing the story of her adopted children. On the days when we teachers think we have nothing left to give our students, remember the depth of the love and commitment of this teacher and her husband. Evidence of the fruit of their labors is already beginning to show in the poem Vanessa wrote and read for our Insights and Echoes Christmas assembly.

Troubled Girl By Vanessa L. I thought I was bad Because of my troubled life Troubled girl? I was one. Getting in trouble was my job School? I didn’t need it Parents? I didn’t have them I was on my own. I fought for no reason Because I came from the streets Help? No I didn’t need it I didn’t need anybody I didn’t have nobody Just my little brothers My mother in jail Watching her do her thing I learned some living style Drugs, drugs, drugs I was living from drugs Selling them every day Risking my life Fighting for a living It’s sad the way I used to live

It’s sad the way I used to be I used to be a troubled girl I used to be a fighter I used to be scared I used to be bad But this is my past Now I have changed. Everything about me has changed I know now I need parents I need school I need an education I don’t need to fight anymore I don’t need to hide I don’t need to be ashamed of Where I came from Now I need to show the people Who thought I couldn’t do it I need to prove to them That I made the difference In my troubled life. May all of us as educators strive to make a difference in a troubled student’s life.

Other Ways to Share and Care Ellen, a teacher’s aide, told me about the fun she has with a group of six teachers from her school. Once a month they take turns going to each other’s houses or meeting at a restaurant for a meal. Ellen is the only one in the group who does not drink, but that does not prevent her from enjoying her colleagues. She has dubbed her group “Six Winos Minus One.” It is easy to see why they enjoy her company. In addition to her wit and warmth, Ellen accepts people as they are. She does not pass judgment on her friends, but neither does she feel compelled to change her convictions. She provides

a joyful witness without having to indulge in alcohol. What does she do when it’s her turn to host the Six Winos for dinner? Ellen tells them, “Bring your own bottle, but make sure to take it with you when you leave. I don’t want it.” Another way Ellen has exercised her faith in the public school arena is by trusting God to give her the strength to show up for work every day as she battled ovarian cancer. Ellen says she missed only one day of school even though there were days she didn’t feel that great. She credits the success of her surgery and her healing to the power of prayer. Eleven years later, she is a cancer survivor and a living testimony of how prayer changes lives.

Salt and Light Many teachers have prayer partners and some hold Bible studies before or after school. I know I could not continue doing what I do without the support of my prayer buddies. Sometimes it takes a reminder of a strengthening verse or an encouraging devotional thought to press on. Veneal Williams, a media assistant at a local elementary school, has encouraged hundreds of teachers by sending out her Salt Shakers daily devotions. With her permission, I have included one at the end of each chapter. In honor and memory of her mom’s love and support, Veneal intends to compile these devotions into a book to refresh the minds and hearts of countless teachers and remind us all of our connectedness to each other. Note: For those who desire prayer partners, CEAI offers means of connecting with Christian teachers in other schools. See Chapter 12, “Resources.”

Beyond the Classroom “Transforming a Generation, Impacting a Nation”—thus reads the heading of the newsletter from a family serving in Phnom Penh Thmey, a suburb of Cambodia’s capital city Phnom Penh. Although all teachers claim the same responsibility and privilege of transformation and impact on the families and communities they serve, Chris and Victoria, a missionary couple in Cambodia,

provide a most unusual and generous example of sharing and caring. In the English classes Chris teaches there, he finds that building relationships in the classroom allows him to gain his students’ trust and the opportunity to invite them to church services. In fact, he says that ninety percent of the people who attend their church began in English classes. With over 600 students attending daily classes beginning as early as 6:30 a.m. and running as late as 7:30 p.m., their school buzzes like a beehive. Responsibility for students’ well-being goes far beyond the classroom. Most of the students come from families who live in far-away rural areas and have sacrificed tremendously to send their students to school in the city. Often there is not enough money to provide for adequate food. Malnutrition is a major issue, as is sickness and disease. The Cox family has taken in three students who had no place to live and, in addition, provides meals for as many as they can fit around their table on a daily basis. Although living in this “fishbowl” is not easy, Chris and Victoria realize their opportunities to share the love of Christ every day are worth the inconvenience and lack of privacy. Plus, they know for a fact they are rescuing students from a probable life of low-wage factory work, slavery, or—even worse—the sex trade industry, as these are the only options for young adults who have nowhere to live and no way to make money. Sharing food around their table as well as allowing students to share their home gives the Cox family much pause for thought when they come back to the United States for a rare visit. At first they experienced culture shock in Cambodia when they watched their new native friends eat everything from spiders, crickets, and roaches to dogs, cats, and rats. Now they experience culture shock when they return to the States and find such an abundance of food available on every street corner. In contrast, their wish-list of things they cannot buy in Cambodia is incredibly simple—Scotch tape, ranch dressing, Kool-Aid, crayons, craft supplies, and so forth. Two stories about living conditions in Cambodia cause me to cringe when I think about how quickly we complain about the temperatures in our classrooms. Victoria says the 100-degree heat

makes sleeping nearly impossible, especially when the sometimes sporadic electricity stops and renders their fans useless. In those instances, she relegates herself to staying up all night to spray water over her sleeping children and swat the mosquitoes away. Another problem created by the heat and lack of reliable electricity is a dearth of sanitary meat. Going to the “fresh market” means something very different in Cambodia than it does in the USA. There, one likely encounters browning slabs of meat hanging from hot canopies and has to swat swarms of flies away before taking the purchase home. Talk about a natural appetite suppressant! Still, Chris and Victoria rejoice in the fact that they have the freedom to share their faith. Because the Khmer Rouge Regime slaughtered the elderly and the educated, foreigners are currently welcome to help rebuild the impoverished nation. However, the Coxes know this may not be the case for very long. “It’s not like we have a secure freedom. It could change at any minute,” Victoria states. (See www.chrisandvictoria.org for more information about the teaching and ministry of this couple and their four young children.) Father, show me how to share and care in ways that demonstrate your love. Help me be willing to do whatever it takes wherever you take me to bring your message of truth and hope. Thank you for the friendships and encouragement you provide from colleagues and other support systems. Each one offers refreshment to my spirit. I am so grateful for prayer partners who help me carry my burdens and remind me to claim your precious and powerful promises.

SALT SHAKERS Job Knows When Job’s three friends . . . heard about all the troubles that had come upon him, they set out . . . to go and sympathize with him and comfort him. . . . No one said a word to him, because they saw how great his suffering was. —Job 2:11, 13

Then later, after much conversation, Job said, “. . . miserable comforters are you all! Will your long-winded speeches never end?” (Job 16:2-3). Job got just what he needed from his friends—at first. During his anguish, his friends came and sat with him silently for seven days. This act of friendship—their mere presence—brought comfort. But then, they spoke—a lot. Although they did not mean to inflict harm, that’s what they did. They were eager to find answers, offer solutions, and bring closure to a bad situation. Yes, Job’s friends were of great comfort until they spoke. Many times, no speaking or less speaking is best. A similar modern-day tale: Visiting Dad after Thanksgiving Day, I quickly detected he was not only immensely sad, but quite irritable. Well-meaning friends had been advising him on how to handle his life and grief. They shared words of wisdom, books, and notes. What I figured out during this time is that our grief/losses are like snowflakes . . . while some may be similar, no two are identical. What works for some does not work for others. Finding one’s way on how to continue life is a personal journey. What might be needed most from others is time, compassion, kind companionship, and sensitivity. What might be needed less are words and advice. Have a compassion-filled day!

EIGHT

LEARNING TO LOVE H A N DL IN G HOS T IL I T Y But I say unto you, Love your enemies, bless them that curse you, do good to them that hate you, and pray for them which despitefully use you, and persecute you. —Matthew 5:44 KJV

Charlene Chastain, a friend of mine who died many years ago, offered excellent advice about getting rid of mental and emotional garbage from the times someone hurts or criticizes you. She said the best way to respond is this: “Don’t nurse it, don’t curse it, and don’t rehearse it. Just reverse it.” There are countless opportunities to put that advice into practice, but I don’t always get it right on the first try. I remember a time when something I said in a faculty meeting inadvertently made another teacher very angry. I honestly didn’t intend to offend her, but I could tell I had, so after the meeting I stopped by her room to try to set things straight between us. I should have kept walking! That teacher let me have it with both barrels blazing. Her diatribe went something like this: “Okay, now that you’ve stepped into my territory, I’ll tell you exactly what I think of you. You are the biggest fake I have ever seen. Nobody can be that sugary sweet all of the time and be real. You’re also the most unprofessional teacher I’ve ever met. I have absolutely no respect for you.” Stunned, I could barely stammer out a response. My mind flashed back to a pastoral counseling session with Dr. Kirk Neely who advised me years ago how to answer those who find fault with you and with whom there is really no point in arguing. After all, they will not hear you, anyway.

“I’m sorry you feel that way. Would you like to continue this conversation in front of the principal?” Of course the answer was no. Her fuse had burned out. Still, the entire encounter left me shaken. I will admit I avoided that teacher for the next several weeks. There was no rational way to justify her angry outburst, but I sure didn’t want to incite another one. Over and over, Charlene’s advice replayed in my mind: “When someone criticizes you or finds fault, your natural reaction is going to be hurt feelings. You’re going to want to dwell on it, to get revenge, to expect an apology. You’ll want your friends to be on your side. You’ll be tempted to tell the story again and again to gain allies and comfort. But the best way to handle those kinds of situations is this: Don’t nurse it, don’t curse it, and don’t rehearse it. Just reverse it.” How do you reverse a “curse” like that? I did the only thing I could think of. Several afternoons after all the faculty and staff went home, I stayed late. Before I left the building, I made my way to that teacher’s classroom door, laid my hand on her nameplate and asked the Lord to bless her. I prayed for her family members, her students, her home life, her health. Although it was several months later that all evidence of her antagonism disappeared, the Lord gave me peace and reassurance right away as I “reversed” the negativity she had poured out on me into positive blessing for her. I am not saying it is easy, but it is worth a try. I realize there may be times when a different action is necessary. In fact, in the event things escalated beyond that nasty little encounter, I kept a written report of the incident on file. But I never had to use it. Jesus calmed the storm and in a few months’ time, it was as if the incident never happened. I often credit Charlene and Dr. Neely with saving my sanity with their advice, which I have since passed on to my students. Students need our help to learn how to resolve conflicts and how to deal with difficult people. We also need to model how to love difficult people without giving in to their demands or being devastated by their criticisms.

Another valuable tidbit I have tried to put into practice came from a speaker at a women’s conference. I wish I knew who to attribute this to, but I had just entered the arena and did not catch the speaker’s name. But I do remember what she said: “Ladies, somewhere along life’s path we are all going to encounter some negative, critical people. As Christian women, we have a responsibility to these people. So the next time you have to deal with a person who is negative or critical toward you, don’t just walk away from that individual. RUN! The auditorium erupted with laughter. I had never felt such sweet relief. You see, all my life, I have tried to please others. And when I encounter a person I cannot please, whether in my family or in the workplace, it bothers me immensely. I poke and pry my memory bank for unintended offenses as though trying to worry a splinter out of my finger with a hot needle. Or I lose hours of sleep or serenity trying to dream up new approaches or conciliatory acts of kindness.

Absolute Dependence on God There’s no doubt in my mind that I still need to hold my tongue and tame my temper at times, and when either of those flames burns out of control and an apology is in order, I make one. But more and more, I simply take the conflict to the Lord. He will fight my battles for me, and time will heal all wounds. These precious reminders from Psalms also help: When I cry unto thee, then shall mine enemies turn back: this I know; for God is for me. In God will I praise his word: in the Lord will I praise his word. In God have I put my trust: I will not be afraid what man can do unto me. —Psalm 56:9-11 KJV Be merciful unto me, O God, be merciful unto me: for my soul trusteth in thee: yea, in the shadow of thy wings will I make my refuge, until these calamities be overpast. I will cry unto God most high; unto God that performeth all things for me. —Psalm 57:1-2 KJV

Knowing God controls the outcome and is working in your behalf frees you up to see your “enemy” in a fresh way. You will likely gain a fresh awareness of that person’s pain or need and find yourself able to offer compassion and assistance once you are no longer concerned about fending off blows. Eventually, you begin to see fewer faults in the person you once thought venomous and find new ways to respond in love. Francis Chan, in his book Crazy Love, issues a reminder of our absolute dependence on God to help us make this happen: The fact is, I need God to help me love God. And if I need His help to love Him, a perfect being, I definitely need His help to love other, fault-filled humans. Something mysterious, even supernatural, must happen in order for genuine love for God to grow in our hearts. The Holy Spirit has to move in our lives.1

I Am Not the Judge At the beginning of this school year, a young man named Daniel became my chief antagonist of the day. His air of arrogance, reference to selling drugs (even in jest), crude sexual references, and deliberate acts of dishonesty made me sick. I dreaded my encounters with him and found myself disliking him intensely. Yet, wouldn’t you know, he had the same name as our son, Daniel, and it did not take much of a memory jogger for God to remind me that the name Daniel means “judged by God.” It was not my place to judge or convict him, but I did reprimand him for his offensive behavior, reminding him that he was hurting his reputation when he drew negative attention to himself. Of course, I made the appropriate contacts home and also to administration and guidance. In spite of the fact that I wanted to keep my distance from Daniel, I moved him to the front row closest to my desk and main teaching area. Every time he demonstrated appropriate behavior or positive effort, I did my best to commend him. I also purchased a ticket to Romeo and Juliet in order to see his performance. He shone in his role and showed tremendous evidence of preparation and talent.

Still, it was after Thanksgiving before I saw any inkling of change. No doubt, he had heard from his uncle, the principal, and the guidance counselor by that time, but the real choice to change was his. Daniel began to pay close attention, follow directions, demonstrate respect, show interest, and participate in meaningful, rather than distracting, ways. To my delight and surprise, Daniel had this to say in his essay evaluating his personal connection to our “Unsung Heroes” Project and Presentation: Honesty and Kindness Well, I chose my good old grandma again. What character traits did I choose that I want to follow after my grandma? They are honesty and kindness. The reason I chose these qualities is because I feel that if I improve on being truthful and nicer sometimes, I think that I will become more successful in life. If I am a rude and nasty person, no one will like me. That will mess me up in everything. But what will I do to become more honest and to become more kind? Well, I am going to try harder at what I do. One way I am going to improve on this is, when I do something bad, instead of lying about it and making up excuses, I am going to be honest and tell the truth. Also, when it comes down to being kind, I will have to improve on that also because in the Bible it says “What goes around comes around.” So one day I could be very rude to somebody, then the next day I could be trying to talk to some girl and she could be as rude as I was mean to the other person. The Bible also says, “Do unto others as they do unto you.” I took that as if being mean to someone that is mean to me. But I found out that if I am kind and respectful, then they will be kind and respectful. So I learned from that also. What do I think will come of these traits? Well, with the honesty, what will come of it is first, I won’t sin against God; second, more people will trust me, and third, if it came down to having a job to supply money, I could be the person to do that. With kindness, it will also help me with better relation-

ships with teachers if I want to be Student of the Month. Maybe the teacher would recommend me. Also, I was told that one day my kindness will be turned into success. So from now on, my goal is to be kind and honest throughout my life. Thank you, God, for loving Daniel so much that you helped him want to change. Even though his motives and his knowledge of scripture might still need a little refining, at least he is looking in the right direction and aspiring to much higher values. Please keep your hand on his life and use his talents for your glory. And thank you for giving him such a wonderful grandma!

Meet Them at the Track I remember another stubborn student who saw no merit in anything I assigned and told me so emphatically. His only interest was in go-kart racing. Therefore, since I could not reach him on my playing field, I asked my husband on a date with me to Josh’s go-kart race. That Friday night found us far from home way out in the country. The only “business” within miles was a juvenile correctional facility we passed on the way. Yet when we arrived at the dirt track and found a place on the cold bleachers, I knew we had made a good choice. I was able to see Josh in his world and show an interest in something important to him. Although he did not fare well in the race that night, the matter-of-fact way he handled his defeat gave me reason to commend him for his maturity and sportsmanship. Also, I witnessed a closeness in Josh’s family—very heartwarming, and far too rare. That one investment of time paid off in a changed attitude and effort from Josh. We had a tiny bit in common at least, and I could understand a little more about what made him tick. Lesson to be learned: As often as possible, especially when students have priorities other than school, do your best to enter their world and show interest in what is important to them.

Dear Father, How amazing is your love for us. How wide, how deep, how precious your mercy and lovingkindness. Thank you, Lord, for every person you put into our path and for every opportunity to serve you through love. When we encounter the difficult or the downtrodden, Lord, help us know how to respond. May we be so confident in your love that even the calamities that occur have no power to shake our faith or our resolve. Help us move past misunderstandings with those who are hard to love so that even our enemies are at peace with us.

SALT SHAKERS Best Lesson from Last Year Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, faithful in prayer. . . . Rejoice with those who rejoice; mourn with those who mourn —Romans 12:12, 15

Before we move on, let’s take a thoughtful look back to the past. What experiences from the last year impacted you the most? Any lessons learned or fresh insights come to mind? During the past couple of months, God has opened my eyes to the importance of being sensitive to the needs of others. So many around us are hurting because of death, sickness, loneliness, separation, lies, job loss, broken promises, abandonment, shattered dreams. I pray that my understanding and caring of the needs of others extend beyond the moment I am first made aware of their situation. I don’t want to treat their suffering or hurt as part of my check-off list: call (3), send card (3), pray (3). Through you, Lord, I have experienced the power and importance of being covered by a soothing salve. You are a continual healing and caring friend. Thank you for reminding me and showing me how to genuinely carry and comfort a friend in need. Thank you for being the most important part of my past, present and future.

Have a thought-filled day!

NINE

LEARNING TO LAUGH L IGH T ENIN G U P A merry heart doeth good like a medicine: but a broken spirit drieth the bones. —Proverbs 17:22 KJV

It was one of those days—you know the kind. It just started out on the wrong note. One of the students wobbled into the classroom looking queasy and feverish, but he insisted he didn’t need to go to the nurse and couldn’t go home even if he was sick. After all, his dad made him come to school regardless of the fact that he had been throwing up all night, gotten only one hour’s sleep, and still had a fever. I let him “tough it out” in the “Don’t Bug Me” chair for a while, but then decided to overrule and send him to the nurse anyway. She sent him home and we wiped down all the desks, chairs, and doorknobs. That was just the beginning. Every plan I had for productive class time fled the premises at the sound of the tardy bell. As soon as the students realized I had created a new seating chart, the complaining commenced. My reminder that there were “too many chiefs and not enough Indians” fell on deaf ears. One girl struck an attitude of defiance while another attempted what I knew would turn into a power struggle: “Mrs. Parker, Can I ask you a question?” “No, not now. From past experience, I anticipate your question will be one that leads to conflict, so please don’t ask it while I’m giving directions. However, if you still have a question after everyone is productively occupied, no problem.” She declined, but there was still murmuring and complaining.

I could not believe my ears. What I thought of as simple directives were met with grievous objections, which I might have understood had I requested they lift 400-pound boulders from a pit and carry them on their shoulders up a six-mile-long steep mountain path. But changing seats? This was ridiculous! A sermon from the savant seemed to be in order. I reminded my doleful charges that responding appropriately to authority was a life lesson all people must learn. After Miss Sassy settled down and Miss Surly moved to her appropriate seat, everyone began responding to the writing prompt of the day, and I surveyed the room to check for other stragglers. Haley and her group were at the computers working on their project due the next week. I saw her hand resting on her boyfriend’s leg. “Hands to yourself,” I reminded her, probably louder than necessary. A perplexed look accompanied her grim expression and tight lips. “Come here, Haley,” I said, beckoning to our conference area. She joined me there and I said, “Sorry if I offended you. You know the school policy, though.” “Oh no, it’s not that. I didn’t even realize I had my hand on his leg. I’m just sad.” “Why’s that?” “My dad doesn’t want me at home. He told me he hates me and doesn’t want me living with him. But he won’t let me live with my mother, either. He says she’s a terrible parent.” What could her mom have done that would merit such disapproval? I wondered. Knowing what Haley had shared earlier about her dad’s parade of girlfriends living with them for the last several years, it made no sense for her dad to pass such judgment. And how could a dad say to his daughter he did not want her in his life? I reeled my thoughts back in and tried to offer some comforting words before sending Haley back to her group. That’s when the next challenge commenced. Mylo’s head was beginning its daily descent into oblivion. He must have had another of his sleepless nights. I walked over to

him, nudged him, and said, “Mylo, I need you to operate the remote for me during our PowerPoint today.” “Okay,” he mumbled, his head wobbling back to an upright position. But when I placed the PowerPoint controller in his outstretched palm, he groggily pressed the wrong button and shot a laser beam straight into Alley’s eyes. “No, Mylo!” I screeched. “Not the laser! Don’t blind your classmates!” Now we were all awake, or so I thought. Our PowerPoints started to roll and the students actually began to participate. After all, they were seeing their own work presented and knew I planned to base their test on the best material presented. But ten minutes later, I heard gentle snores emanating from a Sleeping Beauty at the front of the room. You have to be kidding me, I thought. Not Danielle. She was my model student—always attentive, compliant, courteous, and prepared. She completed all her assignments days before they were due. Never had she slept in my class before. In fact, with my “Head Up or Head Out” and “Stand Up ’Til You Wake Up” policies, it was rare for anyone to try. Putting one’s head down was definitely taboo in my classroom. Yet here in the space of thirty-five minutes, I had two zone out on me. Mylo was going down again and Danielle would not wake. I nudged her gently at first, then more firmly, calling her name insistently. “Krunnnnnnnghfffff” came the reply. After five times, I stopped. I knew she was recovering from recent surgery and had been diagnosed with diabetes, too, so something in her system or her medication was malfunctioning. I would just have to keep her at lunch tomorrow to make up the missed time so as not to show favoritism. But in the meantime, I didn’t want her to be embarrassed by the snores she was bound to be teased about later. Back to the PowerPoint. I would just speak a little louder to cover the sound of the snores. But no, an intercom announcement from the office commanded me to check my e-mail for an important message: Mylo was needed in Guidance immediately. I sent him there and handed the remote to Matt. Just a few more slides; just a few more minutes.

Thankfully, my other three classes slid by smoothly. Gratefully, I dashed out the door for my grad class forty miles away. I only hoped I wouldn’t begin snoring in my class!

Whatever Perhaps you have those days in your classroom, too, where in spite of your preparations and your mostly pleasant personality, now and then it seems there is a conspiracy underfoot to undermine your best intentions at teaching well. How should you respond? You can cry, you can sigh, or you can laugh. These same darling cherubs who make life in the classroom difficult often provide sage advice for making it easier too. One day after explaining the agenda of the hour, I heard Tyler speak up from the corner. His comment was loud and intrusive, but captured my attention for a different reason. He had pegged a problem I needed to work on. “Mrs. Parker, You’re such an overachiever. You need to lighten up.” “How would you suggest I go about doing that?” “Just learn to say ‘Whatever.’ Don’t take things so seriously all the time.” “Hmmm. That probably is good advice. I’m sure I could profit from it. Thank you, Tyler.” How ironic that Tyler, the underachiever, was educating me, the overachiever. The truth was I did take my job, my lessons, and myself far too seriously much of the time. However, thanks to Tyler, change was coming. A student named Chue, prone to wandering around the classroom and straying off task even when in his seat, made the mistake of sitting down on top of a low bookshelf on one of his voyages. With a loud crack, the top shelf broke off and Chue stumbled to the floor. Looking chagrined and embarrassed, Chue held the broken shelf up in front of him like a shield and began apologizing. Twenty-nine students looked at me to see what I would do. Out of my mouth came a word I’d never used before in this context. “Whatever,” I said, shrugging my shoulders. “You’re not mad?” Chue asked incredulously.

“Why should I be? Looks like the shelf will hold more books now. We can stack them to the ceiling since there’s no top shelf anymore.” The class laughed and Chue breathed an audible sigh of relief. Afterwards, Cayla wrote “The Whatever Day” in the middle of the broken board and every student signed his name. It truly was a turning point for me. Now and then when I find myself getting too serious again, I take the Whatever board and place it in front of the classroom and allow the students some downtime and myself a moment to laugh.

Let It Roll Not many days later, under an extremely tight deadline for the publication of our school literary magazine, I realized that in spite of several intense weeks of work in the classroom, several very late nights at school, and several wonderful people giving extra assistance, our magazine would still not be ready on schedule. With every edit, we kept finding mistakes and inconsistencies. Or the changes we thought we saved from the day before somehow disappeared. At the last minute, I made the executive decision to forego the table of contents and just let the readers find their favorite authors or artists with the index (no page numbers). Page numbers should have been a simple task, but for us, it was the final touch we simply could not finalize. So, in spite of the fear of criticism and an inner need for perfection in publishing, I took a deep breath and said “Whatever!” After class, Cayla, one of my favorite “Whatever” students known for her smile and sunny disposition, loaded me and the “Whatever” magazines on a large, gray rolling cart. The corridor appeared cleared, so we rumbled raucously down the hall with me lying on my back like a turtle and my legs kicking up like a can-can girl. Of course, one of my more serious-natured colleagues emerged out of the men’s restroom as we rounded the corner and gave us a questioning look. “Hi, Charles,” I said sheepishly as we rolled by him. He just shook his head, not wanting to know what we were doing.

Cayla laughed uproariously and asked if it were her turn on the cart. Of course, I knew I should be getting back to work, but— Whatever. That day, we needed to laugh.

What Is Your Real Name, Please? It happens nearly every year. You’d think I would have learned by now. I make out seating charts, create name cards, and begin the challenge of learning 100-plus new names and faces. Yet, there are always students who ask to be called something different, sometimes totally unrelated to their actual names. Last year Jeremy wanted to be Craig. John wanted to be Steven, Kaitlyn wanted to be Seabrook, and Austin wanted to be Ernie. “Why Ernie?” I asked. “That’s my name,” he replied. The class snickered, but I shushed them. After all, I was trying to teach them not to say or do anything unless it was kind, necessary, and true—all three. Unfortunately, I soon found out that “Ernie” specialized in the unkind, unnecessary, and untrue. Soon he and his grades were in trouble, and I needed to call home. “Hello, Mrs. ____. This is Dalene Parker. I am Ernie’s English teacher.” “I don’t have a son named Ernie,” she said, preparing to hang up. “Well, I know his real name is not Ernie. But that’s what he asked me to call him. I thought perhaps it was a nickname.” “Nope, never heard it before.” “I’ll straighten that out with him tomorrow. Meanwhile, I need to inform you that “Ernie” is struggling and I hoped you and I could discuss some ways to get him back on track.” The conversation concluded and Ernie’s mom agreed to call him his “new” name when he got home so he would know the game was up. Help Wanted? Another student equally as perplexing made me want to stomp and scream instead of laugh. Sam never came to class prepared.

He never participated. He was just there biding his time until he turned seventeen and could drop out. I tried my best to reach him, to motivate him, to find out what he was interested in and work illustrations and activities into our lessons that would pique his interest. However, Sam had one interest I could not support— chewing tobacco. One day, Sam surprised me by announcing he planned to come for my help session that afternoon. I was thrilled—at first. But when he arrived and I commended him for showing effort, Sam admitted that the only reason he came was because he wasn’t yet old enough to drive and his mother wouldn’t let him go shoot pool until he made up his missing work. Fair enough. At least he was honest. I would work with whatever I was given. Sitting side by side at the computers, Sam asked me to turn my head for a minute. “Why?” I asked. “Because I don’t want you to see what I put in my mouth,” he answered. “Exactly what do you plan to put in your mouth?” I insisted. “I can’t tell you, but I promise you I can concentrate a whole lot better if I have it in there. Besides, you will never know.” He was right, at least partially. I never knew, but I certainly suspected. Later, when Sam actually began to participate in class, he made an offer that made me laugh out loud. Our class had been studying 7 Habits of Highly Effective Teens by Sean Covey and had completed the personality inventory that designated each student as a type of fruit based on certain tendencies and preferences. We had also studied the concept of synergy wherein the combined efforts of all students working together would result in more significant accomplishments than each person’s separate contributions added together. To combine those two lessons, I asked the students to bring to class the fruit that matched their personality type and we would synergize all the oranges, bananas, grapes, and apples into a delicious fruit salad for us to enjoy. Everyone agreed except Sam.

“Mrs. Parker, I can’t bring no fruit to school. But I will be happy to supply the dip.” “That’s a very kind offer, Sam. I’ll have to say no thank you. But I do hope you’ll join us for the fruit salad.” “Let me know if you change your mind,” he said. I just smiled and shook my head. Later, Sam did bring a gift I could accept. He pulled a beautiful nickel-sized rhinestone out of his pocket and held it out to me. “You want this? I ain’t got no use for it.” “Sam, it’s beautiful. I would love to have it. I can put it in the window to let the sun shine through it and reflect prisms of light or I can mark off the days on the calendar with it.” I did both. Each time I saw those rainbow shafts reflecting in the classroom or glanced at the calendar where the rhinestone marked the day, I smiled. God has some humorous ways of helping us connect with our students, even if it does sometimes put a “dip” in our day.

Keeping Us Humble Lest I forget not to take my subject matter or myself too seriously, I have at least one student per year inform me that speaking correct English really is not that essential. Some are more emphatic than others. Josh B., whose plans for the future included becoming a horse farrier (maker and fitter of horseshoes), recoiled at my attempts to teach him standard English and require the practice of correct grammar in the classroom. Finally, one day, he couldn’t take my well-intentioned instructions anymore and blurted out: “Mrs. Parker, I love ya dearly, but I’m gonna shoot straight wijya. ’Em dang horses in ’at dang pasture ain’t gonna give a durn how I talk.” Worse than Josh’s intentional misuse of the English language was the unintentional mistake in the e-mail I sent out to the members of the Academic Rigor Focus Team at our school. After sending, I read it again when a team member replied. To my horror, I realized I had interchanged are for our in one of the sentences. Too late now! Upon realizing my blunder, I sent another e-mail

assuring the team members that any mistakes found were simply intended to see if they were paying attention. Right! Might as well learn to laugh at ourselves, and with our students. Here are a few more classics from the classroom: Cole: Mrs. Parker, The dog really did eat my homework. Me: Then bring me his poop. I need proof. Wesley: Mrs. Parker, I had my journal ready to turn in, but my dad wanted to build a fire and we didn’t have enough kindling, so he made me use my journal to start the fire. Emily: I discovered something interesting in my research about my dad’s asthma. Me: Really, what was that? Emily: My dad can’t be ’round no cats or dogs. But he says the best animal for him to be ’round is a skunk. If he kin smell a skunk spraying, that opens his breathing passages right up.

A Little Grandma in Me James: I have chosen my grandmother as my character to write about because she has one thing I do not have. The character trait she has that interests me most is her strong inner strength. She is always in a do-something mode. This mode is always to get the job done and done right. Sitting around and doing nothing is not her game. An idol mind and idol hands don’t make much of one’s life. Embellied? Bridgett is another student who accidentally mixed up her words. Bridgett tore into the classroom waving her essay like a flag. “Mrs. Parker, I did it. I did what you told me to. I embellied my paper.” I looked up in confusion. “You did what?” “I did what you told me to do. I embellied it! I think you’ll like it a lot better now. I can’t wait for you to read it.” Bridgett’s words tumbled out in a torrent.

“Bridgett, slow down and explain what you mean. It sounds like you ate your paper.” “No, Mrs. Parker, don’t you remember? You told me to embelly it—to add more words, fancy it up a little, explain it better. I liked that embelly word so much that I told all my other teachers you taught it to me.” “Oh, I see. Well, thank you, dear. I look forward to seeing the changes you made.” Outwardly, I smiled as I took Bridgett’s paper. Inwardly, I cringed. What other great tidbits of wisdom have students like Bridgett attributed to me as their teacher? I wondered. Later, as I read over Bridgett’s embellishments, I realized it didn’t matter. She may not have gotten the word right, but she did get the point. Her “embellied” essay was much improved. Most important, however, was Bridgett’s exuberance for learning new ideas and sharing them with others. That was something to be proud of, whether I got the proper credit or not. Although I don’t remember all of my students’ names, and certainly not their essays, Bridgett and her “embellied” paper will forever stay etched in my mind—or should that be my stomach?1 Father, thank you for the gift of laughter. Help us have merry hearts. Help us honor you with light spirits. Make us quick to see the humor in situations so we don’t take ourselves so seriously. I want students in my classroom to experience fun—good, clean, laugh-outloud, endorphin-producing fun. Help us live and learn in a way that makes you smile, too.

SALT SHAKERS A Sign of the Time—and Not Divine Let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts . . . —Colossians 3:15

At an elementary school it is not unusual for a parent to leave the car running outside to take a forgotten item inside to his or her

child. But a car running an hour after school starts is unusual. In a teacher’s hurry to get to her classroom while finishing a conversation with a family member on her cell phone, she forgot to turn her car off. ’Tis the season—to slow down. Feeling pressured, rushed, scattered, overloaded, frazzled, uptight? Take a look at yourself and reassess where you are and where you need to be. What’s really important, especially right now? What’s ruling in your heart? ’Tis the season—to celebrate and remember, Jesus has taken care of all that really matters. The rest in life is just fluff stuff. Have a peace-filled day!

TEN

LEARNING TO EXERCISE G A ININ G GROU N D Do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own; you were bought at a price. Therefore honor God with your body. —1 Corinthians 6:19-20

After a couple of fledgling attempts in previous years to establish rules and sustain motivation, the Fit Club at our school finally took off last year. Unfortunately, I never made any real progress or real commitment to this club. But I did look forward to my weekly walks with Carolynn. Monday night found me sitting at home at the computer creating a rubric for an assignment, linking websites to my webpage, and e-mailing myself reminders about what I needed to accomplish at school the next day. The list grew far too long far too fast, but it was time for bed, so I stopped. Wait. I had to add one more thing before I hit send: Walk with Carolynn. Ahhh—something to look forward to at the end of the school day tomorrow. I made a mental note to remember to put my tennis shoes by the door. Now that it’s getting dark earlier, I will be even more eager to leave the building at 5 o’clock and start our three-mile conversation—with pleasure. Carolynn is one of several Christian friends the Lord has blessed me with at my school, but she is the only friend with whom I exercise on a weekly basis. And even though it is just once a week, it still fills a great need in my life—exercise! I just don’t get enough, do you?

Lately it has been even less because I somehow dislocated my kneecap during an exercise class. I’ve actually had to follow the “Good leg up, bad leg down” routine when tackling stairs at home and at work. Icepacks, elevators, and physical therapy have been my closest companions for a couple of weeks. I can’t even get down on the floor and back up again without a small army to assist me. However, this little setback ensures I will never take my knees or the simple act of walking for granted again. So, I’m really looking forward to tomorrow’s walk with Carolynn. I fully expect her stamina will outlast mine since Carolynn and her husband Brian have been working hard together on weight loss and exercise. They even bought a tandem bike to ride on weekends. I admire them both for their determination and selfcontrol. It’s definitely paying off. Yet, I have made it my goal not to lose weight so I could inherit Carolynn’s beautiful clothes that are now too big for her!

Encourage One Another The conversations I have with Carolynn as we walk are just as wonderful as the exercise. We talk about our children or our students or we discuss a faculty meeting or technology tip. Sometimes Carolynn even listens to me recite my Bible memory verses for a class I’m taking. We almost always end up sharing prayer time on our walk, giving our concerns over to the Lord and encouraging each other. Hebrews 10:24-25 NIV is our mantra: “And let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds. Let us not give up meeting together, as some are in the habit of doing, but let us encourage one another—and all the more as you see the day approaching.” I am so thankful for these times of soul and body rejuvenation. Like everyone else, teachers need exercise. During class, I try hard to model good nutrition and encourage exercise. When I have a snack in front of my students, it’s usually something like V-8 juice, carrot juice, cheese, or healthy homemade muffins. Sometimes I’ll make some for them and have them guess the ingredients. In fact, since I teach four classes in a row without

any breaks, some days I get a little woozy if I don’t have a snack, so I allow my students to have one also—as long as their snacks are healthy. I could not believe what I “learned” one day when I saw Becca eating pop tarts. When I walked over to remind her that the snack had to be healthy, she showed me the wrapper. “See—it has whole grains in it.” Hmmm.

Let’s Take It Outside At least once a semester, I try to take my students outdoors for class. This practice is not too common in high school, but the students almost always list our outdoor class as one of their favorite activities when they give an evaluation. Thankfully, our principal is flexible enough to accommodate our excursions as long as we notify the office of our whereabouts. So far, our outdoor classes have included “Open Mic,” a preposition hunt, vocabulary dodge ball, student presentations, and a Stargirl parade using musical instruments. I usually bring old blankets and quilts to sit on when we take a break. If the occasion merits, we take digital photos. It is really fun to try trick photos using unusual angles and special effects. These make great teambuilding exercises and pleasurable memories. One Saturday, I met my Creative Writing students on a nature trail that most of them had never been on even though it is free and only a few miles from their homes. It was so refreshing to enjoy that kind of downtime with my students outside the classroom. Of course, we celebrated with orange juice and flaxseed bran muffins. And, I admit, I offered them extra credit for getting up early on a Saturday morning. But my main objective was getting to spend quality time with them and getting them to take advantage of the mind-cleansing creative energy that comes from time spent outdoors. Filling Our Think Tank Marie Duncan shares these thoughts about how finding time to exercise at school helped her physically and mentally:

As an elementary teacher, I looked forward to recess as much as my students did. I needed the mental break of switching off the “on” mode of instruction. Making time for exercise in my day as a teacher, mother, and wife was not happening, so I stashed a pair of tennis shoes next to my desk. As my students lined up for recess, I slipped on my tennies and began walking around the playground area as my children played basketball, climbed the jungle gym, or kicked around a soccer ball. Besides being able to remove the “wide load” sign from my derriere over time, I received other kudos. My students seemed happier. The one or two socially awkward students who preferred to hang around the teacher’s bench instead of mingling with their classmates were better able to connect with other students when I “pushed them out of the nest.” This habit paid off later in the day, too. Instead of spending my drive home from school pondering over the gossip shared on the teacher’s bench, I was able to exercise better self-care with less anxiety about the workday. We all make choices about how we fill our think tank. Exercise provides a clear connection to clear thinking. Thanks, Marie, for this excellent reminder.

Exercising Our Minds Obviously, Christ’s command of the Scriptures served him well and gives us an example to follow when tempted or discouraged. Just as our physical bodies crave regular exercise in order to function at peak performance, so too our minds require exercise. Of course, teachers are in a prime position to continue learning every single day regarding ideas or technology. However, nothing can replace the sharpness of mind that comes from permeating our hearts and minds with the Sword of the Lord, God’s Word. No matter what situation confronts us, we can be prepared as Christ was—with knowledge and application of Scripture. If you have not already committed to memory the following Top Ten Scriptures for Teachers, please challenge yourself to do so. Of course,

your top ten list may be very different from mine. The main thing is to start somewhere. Write or type out one passage per week on an index card and place it on your steering wheel or the dashboard of your car. Say or sing the verse aloud as you drive to work. Use the stop lights on your commute to glance at the card to check for accuracy. Another idea is to read or sing the verses into an audio recorder, then play them back as you drive. You will be amazed and gratified at how God uses His Word in you to empower and enable your teaching ministry and your personal life as well. After all, as God’s Word says: “All Scripture is given by inspiration of God, and is profitable for doctrine, for reproof, for correction, for instruction in righteousness, That the man of God may be complete, thoroughly equipped for every good work” (2 Timothy 3:16-17 NKJV). Isn’t that our ultimate goal as teachers? Top Ten Scripture Verses for Teachers Stand firm then, with the belt of truth buckled around your waist, with the breastplate of righteousness in place, and with your feet fitted with the readiness that comes from the gospel of peace. In addition to all this take up the shield of faith, with which you can extinguish all the flaming arrows of the evil one. Take the helmet of salvation and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God. —Ephesians 6:14-17 Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us. . . . —Ephesians 3:20 If any of you lacks wisdom, he should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to him. —James 1:5 Finally, be strong in the Lord and in his mighty power. Put on the full armor of God so that you can take your stand against the devil’s schemes. For our struggle is not against

flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms. Therefore put on the full armor of God, so that when the day of evil comes, you may be able to stand your ground, and after you have done everything, to stand. —Ephesians 6:10-13 And God is able to make all grace abound to you, so that in all things at all times, having all that you need, you will abound in every good work. —2 Corinthians 9:8 May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in Him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit. —Romans 15:13 This is what the Lord says: “Restrain your voice from weeping and your eyes from tears, for your work will be rewarded,” declares the Lord. “They will return from the land of the enemy. So there is hope for your future,” declares the Lord. “Your children will return to their own land.” —Jeremiah 31:16-17 Preach the Word; be prepared in season and out of season; correct, rebuke and encourage—with great patience and careful instruction. —2 Timothy 4:2 Then we will no longer be infants, tossed back and forth by the waves, and blown here and there by every wind of teaching and by the cunning and craftiness of men in their deceitful scheming. Instead, speaking the truth in love, we will in all things grow up into him who is the Head, that is Christ. —Ephesians 4:14-15 Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up. —Galatians 6:9

Exercising the Fruit of the Spirit Just as we make choices about physical and mental exercise, we make choices about exercising Christian character as well. Dr. Ted Miller of Bob Jones University reminds students that Christians should be able to get along with anyone, anywhere, in any situation because there is no law against the fruits of the Spirit: love, joy, peace, longsuffering, gentleness, goodness, faith, meekness, or temperance (Galatians 5:22-23). As Christians, we should show evidence of these qualities in our lives and continue to strengthen them. Exercising Wisdom In Randy Jaeggli’s More Like the Master, the author devotes an entire chapter to the acquisition of godly wisdom, which he defines in this way: “. . . wisdom is skill in the practical application of God’s Word to the experiences of life.” There are so many decisions we have to make as educators that it would be foolish not to draw on the wisdom so readily available to us. Jaeggli asks the following question, which resonates with all teachers: “Do you find yourself having to decide difficult issues of fairness and justice on a regular basis? We need the same wisdom for establishing justice that God gave to Solomon.” He then goes on to share an experience he had with a former college student: On the day when term papers were due in a particular class, I collected the documents and put them in one pile. Over the next few days, a small number of students handed in late papers. When no more papers came in, I assumed that all my students had completed the assignment. But while recording the grades, I noted that I did not have a paper from one of the students. During the next class session I asked him when he intended to complete the class requirement. He asserted that he had handed in a paper and that I must have misplaced it. So I looked everywhere for it. It wasn’t on or in my desk at school or my desk at home. It wasn’t in any of the pockets of my briefcase. It wasn’t under the seats or in the trunk of my car. After confessing to the student that I couldn’t find his pa-

per anywhere, I asked him to print out another copy from his computer file. He responded that someone else had typed his paper, thrown away his rough draft, and deleted the file. There was no surviving remnant of his work anywhere. Even though such a story sounded suspicious at best, I felt that the loss of his paper was my fault. I gave him what I thought were two fair options: 1) he could redo the paper with no time constraints, or 2) I would waive the requirement and calculate his grade in the course with no penalty. He chose the latter option. I told the Registrar what I had done and resolved to be more careful with his papers in the future. Toward the end of the following semester, the Registrar called me to ask the name of the students whose paper I had misplaced. One of my colleagues was having exactly the same problem with the same student! We met with the student and asked him some questions about his papers. I have found that if a liar talks long enough, sooner or later he will contradict himself. It took over an hour, but finally the fellow painted himself into a verbal corner with no way out. He admitted that he had lied and cheated all the way through high school and college. Perhaps I could have helped him a semester earlier if I had picked up the inconsistencies in his story about the lost paper. I hadn’t prayed for wisdom in the matter, and now the issue had developed into an expulsion offense. He went home without his degree just a few weeks before he would have graduated. We all need wisdom in helping those under our charge to live justly.1 Praying for wisdom in situations that arouse suspicion will help determine truth and bring resolution. Aren’t we glad God promises to give us wisdom when we ask Him? “If any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask of God, who gives to all liberally and without reproach, and it will be given to him” (James 1:5 NKJV).

Exercising Flexibility Years ago, I noticed this quote on my supervisor’s bulletin board: “Blessed are the flexible, for they shall not be bent out of shape.” What a great reminder of learning to adapt to whatever situation comes my way without allowing anxiety or a bad attitude to cloud the opportunity that may ensue. After all, as my parents often reminded me growing up, “There is nothing so constant as change.” Might as well be flexible! Exercising Restraint One of the most important classroom rules I established is the KNT rule: Speak only what is kind, necessary, and true—KNT. What students are about to say must pass all three tests before it comes out of their mouths. Once the students know what the letters stand for, I have only to utter the phonetically rendered sound “KuhNut” as a reminder when someone is starting to gossip or badmouth another student or teacher. After all, “KuhNut, KuhNut, KuhNut” sounds rather like a mother hen clucking warnings at her chicks, doesn’t it? I cannot tell you how many arguments or potential fights verbal restraint has prevented. Father, thank you for providing such wonderful opportunities for exercising—especially outdoors. Show us how to take care of our bodies. May we model for our students a healthy lifestyle. In areas we need to make changes, give us the desire, determination, and self-control. Help us support and not sabotage each other or ourselves. Also, thank you for helping us exercise our minds and strengthen our character as well. After all, we want to be fit for your kingdom and able to do the job you have called us to do.

SALT SHAKERS Much to Gain What is more, I consider everything a loss compared to the surpassing greatness of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord, for whose

sake I have lost all things. I consider them rubbish, that I may gain Christ and be found in Him. . . . —Philippians 3:8-9

After not exercising for more than five years, it caught up with me. I tried to remedy my tiredness and sluggishness with vitamins, less sugar, and other dietary changes. I tried just about everything—except exercise. I could not get motivated to make that needed lifestyle change. The more time went by, the harder it was to even entertain the thought. But thanks to a push by my daughter—and the fact that I could not get into a must-wear dress—I finally got moving this week. Why do we avoid what we really need in life, especially when we have so much to gain? What’s lacking in your life? Do you desire to gain confidence, peace, friendship, love? Sometimes we must lose something of less value to gain the true treasures of life. Have a rich-filled day!

ELEVEN

LEARNING TO PERSEVERE T HE WORS T T HIN G Being confident of this very thing, that He who has begun a good work in you will complete it until the day of Jesus Christ. —Philippians 1:6 NKJV

The Worst Thing a Teacher Can Do As was our custom while I checked the roll, my eleventh-grade students spent the first few minutes of class responding to the writing prompt I placed on the board. This particular day’s prompt began: “The worst thing a teacher can do is. . . .” Somewhat distracted, I didn’t give much thought as to how the students would fill in the blank. Although in most cases I took pleasure in my students’ mental meanderings, today I was just going through the motions and counting the minutes until I could speak to the principal about my impending resignation. I had decided enough was enough. At the end of my resources both physically and emotionally, I was ready to resign mid-year. My sixty- to eighty-hour workweeks had caught up with me, and I was running on empty. Fatigue and frustration had derailed my dreams of what teaching could and should be, and I was no longer willing to work so hard to accomplish what seemed like so little. Shaking off my preoccupation, I noticed some students scribbling furiously while others were frowning in concentration. After a few minutes, I asked for volunteer responses. Nearly everyone had something to share. At first the answers were routine and predictable.

Demetria said, “The worst thing a teacher can do is give homework on weekends.” Mildred chimed in with, “The worst thing a teacher can do is give a test on stuff you haven’t studied.” Keith added, “The worst thing a teacher can do is embarrass you in front of your friends.” Around the room we went, each student offering valuable input. Valuable, that is, if I still cared. Finally it was Ricky’s turn. Tall and striking in appearance, when he stood, he commanded attention. He looked me in the eye and began only when he was sure I was listening. “The worst thing a teacher can do . . .” he began. He paused, then repeated himself for emphasis. “The worst thing a teacher can do is quit!” My eyebrows shot up in surprise. How could Ricky possibly have known about the battle raging in my brain? Yet with one deliberate declaration, this young man capsized my thoughts of capitulation. Ironically, Ricky did not even belong in my class. Transferred to our school only a few days earlier, it was obvious he did not require the remediation for which the class was intended. In fact, I had already recommended he be moved to a higher-level English class. However, he had obviously been sent my way long enough to deliver an important message: The worst thing a teacher can do is quit. “Thank you, Ricky. I needed to hear that,” I finally responded, tears smarting at the corners of my eyes. With those nine words, Ricky inspired me to reevaluate my life’s mission and stay in the classroom. Nearly three decades later, Ricky’s influence, along with the inspiration of many other students and colleagues along the way, keeps me going. Every day, I strive to instill in my students competence and confidence, determination to reach their goals and live out their dreams no matter how hard it gets. When they want to give up, I badger or bolster as best I can to keep them from quitting. Won’t you join me in refusing to do the worst thing, too?1

Pray and Persist I don’t know about you, but there comes a time during every single school year where I’m just not sure I’m going to make it to the end. Whether it’s a particularly heavy workload, an especially difficult student to reach or teach, exceptionally demanding family responsibilities, or devastating health problems, something happens every year to make me feel like quitting. But God just won’t let me. And I find He has some pretty creative ways of reminding me that my time as a teacher is simply not complete. One day, as I trudged back to my classroom after a short lunch break, I tried to dispel the sense of gloom I felt. I just didn’t want to be there. My mind and body felt ravaged. Discouragement knocked on my heart’s door. But when I turned the key to open my classroom door, my eyes were drawn immediately to the far corner of the room, over by the window. Two words, Pray and Persist, were highlighted by the sunlight streaming through the window and directly into the handle of the cardboard box to which I had attached a list of “Seventeen Words that Will Change Your Life.” On a table in front of the window, I had paper-clipped an enlarged copy of this list given to me years earlier at a Weight Watchers meeting by the leader, a pastor’s wife and also a public school teacher. It contained the following words: Prepare Listen Smile Care Choose Focus Believe Relax Act Forgive Pray Trust Change Persist Accept

Risk Wait It took my breath away to think that God would give me such a personal and direct word of encouragement. I had to smile. God has always used the written word to speak to my heart, and I believe He wants me to do the same for others. I just wish I could get a message across as concisely and precisely as He does: Pray and Persist. Maybe the words you need to highlight from that list would be different. Take a moment to ask the Lord to show you the words He has in mind for transforming your attitude and your outlook. Even if the circumstances that exhaust or discourage you do not change, the Lord can change you so that you rise above your circumstances and see them from His eternal perspective. I love the verse from 2 Corinthians 9:8 NKJV as a reminder that we don’t have to be able, just mindful of His abilities: “And God is able to make all grace abound toward you, that you, always having all sufficiency in all things, may have an abundance for every good work.”

Wobbling Is Good Was I hearing correctly? Pam, our exercise instructor, gave us instructions and demonstrated the next moves for our balance track. As she moved nimbly from one pretzel pose to the next, she made a paradoxical statement that caught my attention: Don’t worry if you wobble,” she said. “Wobbling is good. It helps you find stability and increases your sense of balance. Remember, balance is a work in progress.” What a concept! Wobbling is good? These thoughts took me back to a time when my daughter, Susanne, at age three, made a statement even more surprising: “Mommy, my mental stability is wobbling.” Say what? I am not 100 percent certain where that proclamation originated, but it did make me worry for a minute! After all, both sides of Susanne’s gene pool have contributed some mental illness or

imbalance along the way, and that’s putting it euphemistically! Admittedly, I have not always modeled mental stability myself. Sarah Young, in Jesus Calling, reminds us of how Christ views our wobbling: “When your private world feels unsteady and you grip My hand for support, you are living in conscious dependence on Me. . . . Instead of yearning for a problem-free life, rejoice that trouble can highlight your awareness of My Presence.”2 I am so glad we have the following verses to exhort and encourage us regarding the source of our stability: “But thanks be to God! He gives us the victory through our Lord Jesus Christ. Therefore, my dear brothers, stand firm. Let nothing move you. Always give yourselves fully to the work of the Lord, because you know that your labor in the Lord is not in vain” (1 Corinthians 15:57-58). So, when life knocks me off balance, I will try to view the “wobbling” that results as an opportunity to become more stabilized. The example of our Savior can encourage us as well. Even though, because of His omniscience, Jesus was not surprised by the people, circumstances, or evil that threatened to topple Him, He kept His balance and fulfilled His mission. Meditate for a moment on Romans 4:20-21: “Yet he did not waver through unbelief regarding the promise of God, but was strengthened in his faith and gave glory to God, being fully persuaded that God had power to do what he had promised.” The more we claim God’s promises, remain strong in our faith, and give glory to God, the more stable and balanced we become. After all, if we are fully persuaded that He is able to perform what He has promised, there is no need to wobble. We can lean right up against our Heavenly Father and count on Him to hold us steady as we stand boldly for what is true, right, and good.

Stop Calling Me Honey “Mrs. Parker, Why do you talk to us like we’re five-year-olds?” Tashia’s question came at a most inopportune time, and her accusatory tone rang with too much challenge. I thought it best

not to answer her during class, but I gave thought to her questions for the next twenty-four hours. What did she mean, exactly? I wondered. The question threw me off balance a bit, because occasionally my students complained that I “used too many big words” they could not understand. So I don’t think she meant my choice of vocabulary sounded as if I were talking to five-year-olds. As I considered other possibilities for what Tashia might have meant, it came to me. My “motherly” habit of addressing my students with terms of endearment such as Honey, Sweetheart, Darling, Dear Ones, Precious really might be offensive or irritating. After all, I did not like it when someone on the phone mistook me for a youngster and called me Honey. It sounded condescending, and it was irritating. Knowing Tashia had experienced far more “adult life” than any teenager should have, I realized my terms of endearment might ring false or condescending to her. But her challenge to me in front of her peers created a challenge for me as well. We needed to have an understanding about the proper way to address an authority figure when in disagreement. Thankfully, I had the opportunity to walk, talk, and pray with my friend Bess that afternoon. Even though Bess had suffered a life-risking hemorrhagic stroke just a few months earlier and was working hard to bring balance back into her life, there was nothing wobbly about her faith. As she prayed for Tashia, I felt my anger and resentment change into a desire for understanding and resolution. Next day in class, I addressed the topic with the class and found there were two other students who felt the same way Tashia did. Although three out of a hundred is not a bad percentage, the feelings and preferences of those should still be important. Since my goal as a teacher is to keep finding fresh new ways to present life lessons as well as subject matter, that sometimes means I need to really listen to my students and hear what they’re really saying. Thankfully, a few minutes of honest dialogue restored the balance between Tashia and me. Yet the situation reminded me that

even when I’m “surefooted,” I may have an offensive or irritating habit knocking my students off-balance.

Don’t Bug Me Sometimes the wobbling needs to be addressed and sometimes it needs to be left alone. The “Don’t Bug Me” chair in my room is by far the favorite piece of furniture in my classroom. Here students may choose to sit once every grading period when they just don’t want anyone to say anything to them. Maybe they need to process something going on in their lives. Perhaps they are behind on an assignment and need a chance to catch up. Or it could be they simply do not feel well and truly should sit apart from their peers. At any rate, teachers are not the only ones who wobble. It is a good thing to give our students a way to regain their stability whether through respectful dialogue to bring resolution or by providing a safe haven for them to think without being bothered. Remember the Potatoes Often we educators feel that the “potatoes” we plant are simply being wasted as they fall into the arid or apathetic minds of unwilling or disinterested students. There simply are days when it seems no one cares or appreciates the preparation or the professionalism we try so hard to model. They seem to prefer a “whatever” day every day when just having fun or doing just enough to get by is the objective. Yet deep down in the dusty soil of their brains and hearts, most students want to grow. I distinctly remember a young man named Joe telling me how disappointed he was that his teacher did not seem to care whether his students learned or not. The teacher showed movies nearly every day and rarely required or graded any work of substance. Joe felt cheated, and rightly so. Although Joe and that teacher are now both gone from our school, their examples and words linger behind. For the teacher, his efforts at the beginning of the school year were met with such disdain and disrespect that he gave up all attempts to inspire or instruct. He decided to finish out his contract

and use up his sick days until he could get a different job. Every day was a test of endurance devoid of joy or significance. Although an intellectually gifted and spiritually sensitive man, evidently there were too many seemingly insurmountable situations to overcome in order for him to flourish in a high school classroom. Seeing this teacher’s distress made me aware that enrichment and renewal are essential for students and teachers alike. Occasionally, a teacher does need to leave his or her profession in order to find himself or herself again.

Can I Come Back to Me? I remember feeling that I had lost myself not even two years into my teaching career. As a result of working too long and too hard with few gratifying results, I experienced serious depression. The “potatoes” might have been growing, but I did not have Angus Buchan’s faith or the fortitude for waiting. In an article entitled “Stop Moping and Start Coping,” I wrote this poem in response to that time of soul-searching: I went away from myself for awhile It seemed like only a day I worked so hard to prove my worth I had no time to play I made all the money I could But like it, my days were soon spent When I tried to get back in touch with my life, I couldn’t find where it went. Is it too late to start again? Can I come back to me? Or have I so imprisoned myself That I can never be free? At least twice in my teaching career I really did need to make a change. In both cases, I had allowed the job to consume me, and

I truly was so spent that I was no good to my students, my family, or myself.

Leap and the Net Will Appear Sometimes the teacher workdays or mini-vacations are enough to give us the strength to keep going, but other times, we need to seek God’s will concerning a possible change of direction. This realization may come through a constant restlessness, gnawing dissatisfaction, or an open door. Or we may have to do as my former student Ashley Robinson advised: “Leap and the net will appear.” In the meantime, God provides all manner of encouragement and impetus for endurance. Again I’m reminded of my colleague Marilyn’s claiming Galatians 6:9 for this school year: “Let us not become weary in doing well, for at the proper time, we shall reap a harvest if we do not give up.” Father, I know you are before all things and in you, all things hold together (Colossians 1:17). Give me the courage and determination to persevere, even when I feel like giving up. Help me to see your purpose for me in this place and this time. Restore not only the joy of my salvation, but the joy of teaching. I know you will accomplish all that concerns me and you will enable me to finish what you asked me to start—through your power and to your glory.

SALT SHAKERS How Do Things Look? “Though the mountains be shaken and the hills be removed, yet my unfailing love for you will not be shaken . . .” says the Lord, who has compassion on you. —Isaiah 54:10

I am not seeing very clearly today. Everything around me is a bit fuzzy and not clearly defined. The crunch beneath my foot last night was not a corn chip, but my eyeglasses. They are now a

crumpled, useless mess. I must see my eye doctor as soon as possible. Sometimes our vision in life gets out of whack due to various circumstances around us . . . strained relationships, hurtful words, careless decisions, dangerous choices, painful mistakes, tempting temptations. Like my broken glasses, there are times when it is obvious we are in trouble and need help. May we find solace in knowing Our Great Physician is always with us. God can take whatever appears to be a crumpled, useless mess in our lives and make it into a thing or person of beauty and value. We can identify flaws and shortcomings, but God has the power to transform them to His glory. Can you see what I mean?

T WELVE

LEARNING TO SEEK RESOURCES

Not long ago, I ordered a set of postcards with a very simple thankyou message on them for the people in my life who go out of their way to provide assistance. The message is this: “You are one of the few people who make my life easier! Thank you.” With that goal in mind, I’d like to offer a few teacher tips to make your life easier. Later in the chapter, you will find resources detailing legal options and obligations all teachers should understand.

Beginning the School Year or New Semester First day tips: Dr. Don Jacobs suggests the following tips for establishing the first days’ routines so essential for keeping classroom order: 1. When introducing your new students to the syllabus and classroom rules, change your tone of voice and your facial expressions. For projects and assignments, smile and use a lighter tone. For classroom rules, use a serious tone of voice and do not smile. This will help students realize you intend their learning to be pleasant and that you mean business when it comes to enforcing the rules. 2. Have a seating chart and use it. Learn student names (and let their classmates do the same) by calling on students from the seating chart rather than playing “get-to-know-you” type name games.

Note: I had been teaching for over two decades before using these two tips. I tried them at the beginning of this school year with my heaviest class load and highest student number ever, and it worked beautifully. Below you will find suggestions for learning student names quickly.

Label Templates: Purchase a box of labels and use the template included to create name labels for each of your students. I created three sets to begin with: one for the index cards used as name cards on student desks, one for their class folders, and one for their two-pocket folders (sent home). Color coding: Because colors help me organize and file more efficiently, I designate a color for each class. Then I try to make all the “accessories” for that class the same color. That means I purchase a set of two-pocket folders, index cards, and hanging file and/or manila folders for each class in the designated color. Index cards: Fold in half lengthwise to make a “tent” and place the student’s name label in LARGE CAPITAL letters on one side of the card. Or place first name (LARGE) on one side and last name (LARGE) on the back. Use these cards to designate student’s seating assignment according to the seating chart you create before students arrive on first day. Color-coding classes: Place first period name cards on top of second on top of third on top of fourth, etc. In my case, I have blue on top, yellow next, red under that, and green on the bottom. At the end of each period, I ask the students to flip to the next class by placing their cards on the bottom of the stack. Most teachers alphabetize by last name for convenience, but I have found that alphabetizing by first name actually assists me in learning names faster. That way, I know with a glance that I’m looking for a student in the first section or rows whose name begins with A-D, the second begins with E-L, and the third with M-Z. I may end up with two Brandons and three Jessicas all in a bunch, but I will learn their names faster that way, and later I can distinguish which is which according to last names and character associations. For example, if I have a Brandon L. and a Brandon C. together and Brandon L. is much smaller, I think Okay, Brandon L. is little compared to Brandon C. If Jessica B. has a bolder personality, I

make that mental association to help me distinguish. Naturally, I keep these word associations to myself. I ask my 100-plus students to give me two weeks to learn their names before they ask for any seating changes (barring an immediate need such as vision or extreme incompatibility). As long as I have typed the names in a large enough font, I can see the students’ names from most anywhere in the classroom and call on them frequently to establish their names in my memory. Once I am sure of the first names, I can have students turn the last names (other side of tent card)toward me until I have learned those too. Another bonus of the name cards is their portability. Our media specialist tries to conduct library orientation the first two weeks. I simply take the name cards down to the media center before my classes arrive and place them on the tables in the same general order they were in the classroom. That way, we don’t waste time trying to get students situated in a new environment. The media specialist can see their names and the students pay better attention than if they had selected seats themselves. Digital mug shots: Now that I have tried this method of learning names, I wonder why I didn’t think of it a long time ago. I have a student helper or volunteer step just outside the classroom and take classmates’ pictures with a digital camera. Students have their name cards with them when they go and hold them just under their chins so I can see name and face together. I ask the photographer to make sure to get a close-up for that purpose. Then at home or after school, I can play a slide show of each class and work on recall of names trying to look at their name cards less and less each time. Although some students really enjoy posing for a camera, it helps to assure students that I am not planning to share these pictures with anyone; then I keep my word. Later, if there are a couple of particularly “entertaining” or especially photogenic shots, I might ask that student’s permission to print out or display his or her picture in an appropriate way.

Helping Students Help Themselves Two-pocket folders: At the beginning of each school year, I find the best back-to-school deal on two-pocket folders and purchase enough for each student to have one for taking home and bringing back his first-day papers. It is worth the dime or so I pay for each folder to keep from having to replace handouts, syllabi, insurance, medical forms, and all the other necessary registration information. These are color-coded by class as well. For my homeroom, which meets only a few times a year, I buy purple or another color not used by the academic classes. Class folders with pass sheet: In order to minimize distractions and paperwork for students needing to go to the restroom, I prepare a folder with a pass sheet stapled into it. This paper has six blocks on it that designate three bathroom passes for the nine weeks, one “Don’t Bug Me” pass, one pass for improving poor grade (with help session), and one block for keeping records of who is my assistant for the day. The assistants get a separate desk and swivel chair to use when not operating the computer for presentations, handing out papers, organizing folders, or running errands. The “Don’t Bug Me” pass is by far the favorite. One time per nine weeks, a student may sit in a very comfortable chair in the corner (purchased from Goodwill or the Salvation Army for $5$10) and no one may bug him or her. The student is still responsible for handing in anything due and for any material covered that day, but if need be, he or she may also complete an unfinished assignment for another class, write a (nice) letter, or just rest. I will not call on that student as long as he or she does not try to sleep. Students love this pass because on the days they have a headache, are having a bad day, or just don’t feel like participating, they have a safe haven. Birthday pass: During the first week of school, I pass around a calendar and have the students sign it on their birthday. If the student’s birthday falls during the time I will be teaching him or her, I give the student a birthday pass, which can be as simple as a piece of cardstock with a star or other shape punched out (by my student assistant) or stationery cut into squares and stapled to the pass

folder. This pass may be used at any time for any of the purposes designated by the other six passes. Usually, I provide the birthday passes in a group for the summer birthdays plus the first month of school (June, July, August for us), then monthly thereafter on a designated day. In December for a class that lasts only a semester, I will lump together that month plus all the “unbirthdays” yet to come, so each student has that extra pass. Reward for not using passes: Students who do not use their passes (with the exception of the assistant passes) are rewarded by getting to sign their names on them, cut them apart, and enter into a drawing for prizes at the end of the semester or end of a grading period. Prizes may be anything a teacher is capable of providing which he or she believes would be motivational for the students. Perfectly good gifts, often still new, may be procured from Goodwill, yard sales, flea markets, or business owners who have merchandise they are willing to donate. I used to “pay” my assistants and award birthdays with a bag of chips, pack of crackers, or fruit roll, but when the economy got tight or family expenses increased, that was no longer wise. Plus, there were always students wanting to buy something from me and it was simply not convenient to run a “store” while trying to teach. I found that entering the students in a drawing once per semester served the same purpose and allowed them all the hope of winning while keeping my budget more intact. Effort and attitude log: Two years in a row at our opening in-services, our school district paid an expert from California to address the issue of student evaluations and assessments, with fairness and accuracy as the primary goals. We were urged to consider adding to our assessments a category most people shy away from because of its subjectivity: attitude and effort. However, over the course of several years, I have experimented with many ways to incorporate this component into my grading, agreeing with the presenter that since future employment and every worthy accomplishment or relationship depends largely on effort and attitude, it is wise to emphasize its importance in our evaluation of students, not just on letters of recommendation. After all, a huge part of our

academic and personal success hinges on the effort and attitude expended to get there. Exit slips at end of the grading period: I ask the students to describe their favorite activity or assignment from this grading period; what they need to help them be more successful and, on a scale of 1 to 10, to rate this class as to how effectively it has helped them learn and to explain their rating.

Teaching from Outside the Classroom Guest Speakers: Consider making it a requirement for each student to bring someone from his or her family or community to share hobbies, life lessons learned, business skills, favorite poems or passages, etc. You will find these human resources often provide far more beneficial lessons than a book ever could. I will always be grateful to “Miss Ellie,” a grandmother who lost use of her vocal chords as a result of smoking and cancer. Hearing her talk with her finger over the hole in her throat convinced many of my students that cigarettes were not as alluring as previously thought. Miss Ellie also offered her phone number and her support for students who needed help in breaking their smoking habits. Unsung Heroes Project: Students choose someone from their school, home, church, or community whom they admire and create a multimedia presentation honoring that person by incorporating audio recordings from interviews. Often, the philosophy or quote that hero lives by will be from scripture. Motivational Movie Clips: Example—Facing the Giants— “Death Crawl” scene where the key player is asked to get down on all fours blindfolded and carry a teammate on his back as far as possible with the coach shouting encouragement all the way. I use this five-minute clip when students need to push harder or regain motivation. I write the following coach’s quote on the board: “Don’t tell me you can’t do more than what I’ve been seeing.” Then I ask students to respond specifically as to how they will approach future endeavors. We share a few of these aloud.

Every time I show this video clip, I have a long list of students who ask to borrow the DVD from me. That way, students are making the choice to watch this Christian movie at home, often with their families, but I have used only the motivational clip in class.

Christian Educators Association International (CEAI) You can learn more about living out your faith in a public school setting and find additional resources by visiting Christian Educators Association International (CEAI) at . Christian Educators Association International’s mission is to “encourage, equip and empower educators according to biblical principles.” The only professional association for Christians called to serve in public schools, CEAI members have served the youth of America since 1953. Finn Laursen, executive director of CEAI, is eager to raise awareness about the support and services offered by this organization. He can be contacted at .

ChristianTeacher.org B. Jane Kulp, founder of ChristianTeacher.org has provided excellent resources and well-researched articles that will “enable Christians teaching in public schools to stand true to their faith while working within the framework of government-regulated curriculum standards.” Visit Kulp’s web site to read the articles “Shining His Light in a Dark Place,” which identifies and explains the governmental guidelines for presenting religious information in a public school classroom. For additional in-depth documents regarding the rights and freedoms of public school teachers, go to this web site and click on “Rights.” On this web site Kulp has also provided an extensive list of resources on “Religion in Public School” that you can find by clicking on “Resources.”

Governmental Guidelines The United States Department of Education issued a document containing a “statement of principles addressing the extent to which religious expression and activity are permitted in public schools.” In 1995, Richard Riley, then U.S. Secretary of Education, worked in conjunction with the Attorney General under the direction of President Clinton to provide every public school superintendent with a copy of the guidelines (revised in 1998). This document is easy to find using your search engine and putting in key words “Department of Education, Richard Riley, statement of principles.” The Equal Access Act The Equal Access Act is designed to ensure that, consistent with the First Amendment, student religious activities are accorded the same access to public school facilities as are student secular activities. Type “Equal Access Act” into your search engine to see it in its entirety. Ken Camp, writing for the Associated Baptist Press, provides an interpretation of how these federal guidelines actually translate into the classroom of Christian teachers. His article entitled “For Teachers, Faith in Classroom Requires Delicate Balance” offers application of this topic. Go to abpnews.com to read his article. Father, I am amazed at how creative and generous you are. Thank you for providing just what we need when we need it. Show us how to use wisely our resources of time, talent, materials and people.

SALT SHAKERS Reach for the Moon Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to His power that is at work within us, to him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, for ever and ever! Amen.” —Ephesians 3:20-21

Book Fair was in progress. I urged teachers every day to put in book requests for their classroom, as parents love to contribute. One teacher was firm in her refusal to write down any requests. She felt that the one wish she desired was far too expensive to ask for from a parent. The price of the moon book was over the moon. Later, overhearing a parent looking for a request from that teacher, I mentioned the unspoken request. You know what she did—she bought the highly desired book. Her love and appreciation for the teacher far exceeded the dollar value of the book. It was not over the moon to her. What would you like? Have you taken your request to the one who loves you best and holds you in highest esteem? It’s not so much what we deserve sometimes, but what the Giver desires to give. Why not give Him the pleasure of delighting you today? You know He loves you to the moon and back—and then some. Have a joy-filled day!

THIRTEEN

LEARNING TO LET GO CO PIN G W I T H LOS S What is more, I consider everything a loss compared to the surpassing greatness of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord. —Philippians 3:8

So far, the most difficult loss I’ve experienced is the sudden death of my precious dad. Fourteen years ago, my phone rang and my mom spoke the most painful words I’ve ever had to hear. “Dalene, I need you to come up to the house. Something has happened to your daddy.” I remember hugging and holding my nine-yearold son and both of us clinging to each other through tears as we learned what had happened to his grandpa. Then there were phone calls to make, endless phone calls. Because my dad died in Hawaii, and we live in South Carolina, I had to make emergency flight plans for our family. We were packed and on our way within a few hours, stopping by in the middle of the night to pick up my seven-year-old daughter from her best friend’s house where she was spending the night. Then off to the airport where I made another life-changing phone call. You see, just a few months prior to Daddy’s “promotion” to heaven, I had promised him I would work smarter, not harder, in the coming year. He had expressed concern about my taking on too many jobs and being pulled in too many ways. Daddy was my greatest encourager and a devoted father and grandfather. He and Mama helped me every time they had the opportunity. But I had three part-time jobs, all geared toward working around my children’s school schedules so I could be available to my family and bring in some income too. However, three part-time jobs soon

equaled more than a full-time job. I had to get up at 3 a.m. and race all day to fulfill my obligations, all for the measly annual salary of five thousand dollars. Even though my intent was to be a stay-at-home mom, the short time I actually stayed at home left little of me to share or care. Once again, my balancing act had become precarious, and it looked as though when I toppled off the high wire, my fall would not only affect my health but my family’s well-being too. Daddy knew that and had expressed concern. His prayers no doubt precipitated the phone call I was about to make from the airport to my future principal: “Mr. Sparrow. This is Dalene Parker. I’m calling to let you know my dad just died and I’m on my way to Hawaii with my family to make funeral arrangements. But since you told me you needed an answer today about the teaching position you offered me earlier this week, I’m calling to say I accept. I’m not sure how I will be able to cope with a new job after the shock of my dad’s death, but I believe he would want me to take this position. I’m going to do my best to honor him and trust God to help me.” Thus, with the loss of my dad, I gained a new job and reentered the realm of public school teaching I had presumptuously promised ten years earlier I would never enter again. I really did not think I could handle the overwhelming obligations of a dedicated classroom teacher along with the devastating death of my dad, not to mention and the needs of other family members. However, God used this loss in my life to wean me away from my dependence on my earthly father to utter reliance on my Heavenly Father. Mr. Sparrow was also instrumental in my healing as he helped me gain back the self-confidence needed for the classroom. Our return from Hawaii and planning for Daddy’s memorial service stateside left absolutely no time to prepare for my new teaching job. But God supplied. I found that my thirty-five-mile commute each way allowed me time to converse with Him and draw from His strength and His creative ideas for managing the classroom and teaching the content. Years later, in an interview regarding my nomination as District Teacher of the Year, I remember a question and answer period that went something like this:

“How have the state standards impacted the way you teach?” “Oh, tremendously. It used to be that I would pray on the way to school, Lord, You got any good ideas today about how I should teach this or handle that? Now I have to spend several hours on Saturdays making sure my teaching plans match the standards.” “Really? How did that first method work out for you?” “Perfectly. After all, God is pretty creative and very wise. He always came through for me.” Laughter erupted all around the conference table and God allowed me the privilege of representing Him and my district as Teacher of the Year. From that platform, I shared what He had taught me in the school classroom and in the classroom of life— about the risky business and the great reward of teaching. More than that, I learned to trust the risky business and the great reward of surrendering my will to His sovereign design. Through tremendous loss, God healed my pain, strengthened my family, enriched my friendships, restored my confidence, and supplied the competence I needed. Best of all, he put me back in the classroom so that I could be an instrument of His grace and love to help heal others’ pain. I’m now more empathetic to students in mourning after experiencing grief firsthand. Jada is only one of several students I teach each year who have experienced devastating loss. The first week of school, she wrote about her grandmother’s death: My Road to Life Jada W. My road to life began when my grandmother passed away. When she passed, I felt like I had lost everything in life. She inspired me to believe in myself because she also believed I could make something of myself. Just about every week my mom, dad, and I would go to her house and just sit and talk to her for hours and hours at a time. She always told me how beautiful my skin was and when she said that, it would just brighten up my day.

After I heard that she got sick, I was just in shock and terrified that I was going to lose her too soon. Well, as time progressed, she became even more sick and weak, and I knew her time on this earth was about to end. About two weeks into the month of July I got a call from my dad. He said “Jada, your grandmother has just passed away.” When he told me that, it seemed like my whole world had come crashing down on me, and I cried until I couldn’t cry anymore. It felt like I just lost my best friend. Many days went by and I kept thinking to myself Wow! I just really lost my grandmother. When I lost my grandmother, many of my friends stood right there by me through this hard time that I was dealing with. They would tell me “Everything is going to be alright because you know she is in a better place and she is watching over you, Jada”. Finally the day came that I was going to see my grandmother one last time. As we arrived at the church where the funeral was held, I saw so many family members who loved my grandma dearly and who also loved the rest of the family just the same. As we were walking into the sanctuary, I saw a lot of sad faces of people who had lost a wonderful friend in my grandmother. When I was walking up towards her casket, I couldn’t believe what I was seeing; my grandmother was really lying there in the casket not breathing. I was so devastated because I was so used to her sitting up, talking, laughing, and just having fun with the family. Well, the time had come to bury my grandmother, and I would never see her again. So many tears had been shed by many different people who truly loved my grandma. Since then my life has been a little shady, but now I’m doing alright since I know that my grandmother is in heaven and she is looking down upon me saying, “Jada, you are so dear to me; continue to be bold and brave and make your mom and dad happy. Do right upon them, and you will be blessed with so many things in life.

In Charles Doss’ poem, “Advice,” he exhorts readers never to be cheated or defeated by grief. My young charges are learning lessons from loss much earlier than I would wish for them, but the least I can do is model how to celebrate each day that we have and trust God’s perfect timing for saying good-bye to those we love.

Could if They Would, but Can’t if They Won’t My dad used to say there are two kinds of people in the world: those who would if they could and those who could if they would. I’m going to add a third category: those who can’t if they won’t. Every year there’s at least one—sometimes many—who, in spite of our most earnest endeavors, will not make it. It might be the pregnant teenager who misses so much school she simply cannot acquire all the necessary skills. It might be a child with true learning disabilities who is unable to keep up with the rigor. There could be home situations so tragic that the student simply views school as a safe haven but cannot concentrate or achieve because of all the emotional baggage clouding thoughts throughout the day. Or it might be a student who is so disillusioned with learning that he or she simply refuses to try. Regardless how valid or ludicrous the reasons, losing even one student who falls through the cracks hurts the concerned educator, not to mention that student’s family, future, and society. Yet as my aunt Lillie, a home missionary and as close to a saint as ever walked this earth in the last century, reminded me: “Even Jesus did not save everybody, Dalene.”

Students Who Choose to Fail—and Why Brock continued to come to class unprepared. After repeated attempts to provide him with everything from writing utensils to an extra copy of the text, Brock revealed his real reason for lack of effort and his apathetic attitude: “I’ve seen plenty of people succeed without getting a high school diploma. My uncle is one of them. He drives a truck and makes a ton of money.”

Loss of Character Ginger Cox, a middle-school media specialist, shared this story of how the loss of a physical object can sometimes represent the loss of something far more important: I lost a cross necklace at school on Valentine’s Day. (My husband had given me the gold cross with a diamond in the center; it had sentimental value.) At the end of the day, I requested a school-wide announcement asking that if the necklace had been found to please return it to me in the librarymedia center. Several sixth-grade girls told the school secretary they had seen a classmate at the water fountain showing it to someone and saying it belonged to Mrs. Cox. Earlier in the year, his teachers suspected him of taking several things from his sixth grade classroom, but there was never any proof. The next day the sixth grade special education teacher walked with this boy to my office. He admitted finding it in the front hallway. When I asked where it was now, he said he had taken it home and put it in his mother’s jewelry box. She didn’t know about it. I told him that the necklace was very special and asked him to bring it back to me the next day. The next day I was summoned to the “acting” principal’s office. He was a retired principal who was substituting for our hospitalized one. Inside the office sat the boy and his mom. As I sat in the empty chair between them, I was told by this irate mom that her innocent child had been coerced by us into a confession. He sat there silently, only saying “No” when asked if he took it. I calmly reminded him that I was confused by him telling me two different things on two different days. Which was the truth? Silence. His upset mom did all the talking. I felt sorry for him. We made no headway as the “acting principal” just observed. Several days later, after talking to the school policewoman, I decided to file a report. I kept the boy’s name on my daily prayer list, praying that he might learn a life lesson. I reasoned that if someone did not challenge this child’s repetitive behavior, he would just get deeper and deeper in trouble. When it

came time for his case to be heard in a juvenile judge’s chamber, I was there, but he and his mom were not. Such frustration! I asked the school policewoman to follow up on the case. The year after I retired, I received a $50 check from the Spartanburg County Courthouse. Since I live in Cherokee County, I called to find out why it was sent. I was told it was half payment from the theft and the second payment would follow. It never did. I wrestled with what to do with the money. I had no satisfaction that he had learned any kind of lesson. By this time, the boy was in high school. I e-mailed the high school guidance counselor and the boy’s special education teacher. I said that I had $50 available for any kind of “character education” activity that would help this student. I kept this child on my prayer list for six years—the length of time it should have taken him to graduate from high school. I still wonder what happened to him. I believe many Christian educators wrestle with how to handle such situations. Many times, we never know the result. Prayer is really the only thing that can make a difference; yet even then, we do not know the end of the story.

Loss of Enthusiasm: The Out-of-Sight Lunar Eclipse At 2:45 a.m. my eyes pop open, and I wrestle out from under the heavy blankets, make a quick stop by the bathroom, and plod into the kitchen. It is time for the lunar eclipse my daughter and I have been discussing excitedly for the past two days. She’ll be up in fifteen minutes, but I want our “viewing station” to be ready. Coffee for me, hot tea for Susanne, two lawn chairs, blankets, gloves, hats, binoculars, and cameras. I’m ready when she stumbles into the kitchen, groaning at the unmerciful hour. “It will be worth it,” I encourage. “Come on, the viewing station is ready.” We make our way into the backyard, dog and cats trailing dutifully behind. Susanne scans the sky and says, “I don’t see anything.”

“That’s because it’s eclipsed,” I answer. “The sky was really red a few minutes ago. We should be at the peak of totality any minute now.” “Hmmm. That’s nice. I’m going back to bed.” “No, honey. You don’t want to miss it!” I wound my daughter up in a heavy afghan and wrapped my arms around her so she couldn’t move. “I do love a backyard adventure, don’t you?” I asked. “Hmmmf” came her muffled reply. My hopes dimmed a half hour later as though a shadow had cast itself over my optimism. Unfortunately, from our viewing station, the lunar eclipse was nowhere to be seen, not even with binoculars. There was no evidence of a moon, just misty clouds swirling above the treetops and curious cats winding around our feet. We both went back to bed, not so certain anymore about the experts who advise us when and where to view spectacular celestial events and definitely not depending on the weather forecasters who promise sunny days and clear, starlit nights. Yet, the reality is that just because we didn’t see it doesn’t mean it didn’t happen. Isn’t life like that? We set ourselves up for something amazing to happen, but it rarely comes through as anticipated. And, of course, the same is true for teaching. We can spend endless hours setting up our teaching stations and learning centers and making all manner of preparation for those assigned to come, but we cannot control what they learn or even what they view as important. Sometimes we cannot even control whether they look in our direction. Occasionally, I have a student who spends her entire class period, it seems, turned away from me and talking to her friends. No matter how many times I call her name or move her, she finds someone to talk to while I am teaching or giving instructions. Consequently, her understanding and her performance are often cloudier than the moonless sky on our thwarted lunar eclipse vigil.

Why Not Me? Anthony Brannon is one student I will never forget. Or maybe I should say Anthony Brannon is one teacher I will never forget. For of all the students I have ever taught, Anthony is the one who taught me the most. Diagnosed with cancer his senior year, Anthony never once showed any evidence of feeling sorry for himself. He kept his nurses, his family, and his friends laughing with jokes and silly stories. He insisted on wearing his cowboy boots round the clock whenever he had to stay in the hospital. That way, he reasoned, he was ready to leave at the first possible opportunity. After all, Anthony had better things to do than lie around in a hospital bed. He loved to hunt, ride his four-wheeler, play with his nephew, and attend country music concerts. It was from his hospital bed that Anthony received his graduation diploma. The superintendent, principal, and Anthony’s fellow graduates gathered beside him in their graduation robes and conferred Anthony’s honors upon him. But the real honor lay in knowing that young man and seeing the steel in his backbone and his faith in his Lord hold up even when his body turned traitor. To me, the most amazing part of Anthony’s story is how he never once asked “Why me?” In fact, when a friend questioned him once about why he was the one who had to suffer, Anthony responded quickly, “Why not me? After all, I’m ready to go to heaven and somebody else might not be.” Anthony clearly epitomized the truth that we can lose everything on this earth but still be completely victorious as long as we have Christ. In the same way, Christian teachers in public schools may not always know why certain things happen in their lives or their classrooms, and they may never know the outcome of their influence on students’ lives. As long as we fulfill our calling to be fruitful and faithful, we will have the satisfaction of knowing God used us to light a spark in what otherwise might have been a very cold, dark world for our students and colleagues.

Our words, our work, our witness—they all matter to Him whether anyone else ever notices or not: “And whatever you do, do it heartily, as to the Lord and not to men, Knowing that from the Lord you will receive the reward of the inheritance; for you serve the Lord Christ” (Colossians 3:23-24 NKJV). As you serve Christ in the classroom, my prayer for you is that you may know without a doubt that you are chosen to teach; that your classroom will be filled with wonders; and that the grace, peace, and power of our Lord Jesus Christ will supply your every need. Father, it is often beyond my comprehension why some students choose to fail when they are offered so many chances for help. Lord, please instill within them a desire to improve and the willingness to accept assistance. Help me not to fall into the mode of judge and jury, but to maintain a positive attitude of encouragement, even when there is no visible evidence of effort. Save the lost and the hopeless, Lord. Help me know when to throw my students a life preserver and when to make them swim.

SALT SHAKERS Can You Believe It? Jesus said “I am the resurrection and the life. He who believes in me will live, even though he dies; and whoever lives and believes in me will never die. Do you believe this?” —John 11:15-16

Rainbows. How do you see them? Beautiful, even though they were created out of tragedy? Appearing after a horrible event, a massive flood, they were given to us as wonderful reminders of God’s promises and love for us. On the surface, looking up at them from earth they form a downward arch, which could also be construed as a frown. But one looking down from heaven sees that same rainbow only one way—as a glorious, colorful smile. I think death is like a rainbow.

During the past six months I have sent out far more sympathy cards than birthday cards. With each card I mail, I am reminded of my deep loss. On the surface that saddens me tremendously, and it forces me to reconsider death as a terrible tragedy, or risk becoming very depressed. Therefore, I am focusing on changing my perspective. So I ask you: is a sympathy card not a special type of birthday card too? From an earthly perspective, death represents a sad end, but for those in Christ it is a heavenly and triumphant beginning. Jesus says, “Because I live, you also will live” (John 14:19). Lord, help us take a heavenly view when we are faced with a powerful loss and to celebrate the “new” birthday of our loved ones with you. May we see death from your side, as an upside-down rainbow, a tragedy turned good and overflowing with fulfilled promises, joyous celebrations, and eternal blessings.

NOTES Chapter 1

1. Pedersen, Evelyn. “Christian Teachers Strive to Make a Difference.” Evangelical Fellowship of Canada. Originally published in Faith Today. September/October 2001. (accessed December 30, 2010). 2. Harris, Sharon “Christian Teachers in Public Schools: A Guide for Teachers, Administrators, and Parents.” Religious Education. FindArticles.com. 30 Dec, 2010. http://findarticles.com/

Chapter 2

1. Frauenfelder, Mark. “World’s Most Unwanted Garbage: Cargo of the Khian Sea.” The World’s Worst: A Guide to the Most Disgusting, Hideous, Inept, and Dangerous People, Places, and Things on Earth. Chronicle Books. San Francisco, 2005.

Chapter 3

1. Parker, Dalene. “Just Give it Three Days.” In Rest Stops for Teachers, 90-92, by Susan Titus Osborn. Nashville: Broadman and Holman, 2003. 2. Young, Sarah. Jesus Calling, 362. Brentwood: Integrity Publishers, 2004.

Chapter 4

1. Wilkinson, David. “Opinion: Heroes Disguised as Teachers.” Associated Baptist Press. May 14, 2010. http://www.abpnews.com/content/view/5146/9/ (accessed Dec 30, 2010).

Chapter 5

1. Chan, Francis. Crazy Love, 169. Colorado Springs: David C. Cook, 2008.

Chapter 8

1. Chan, Francis. Crazy Love, p. 104.

Chapter 9

1. Parker, Dalene. “Embellied.” In Humor for a Teacher’s Heart, 75-76. West Monroe: Howard Publishing, 2004.

Chapter 10

1. Jaeggli, Randy. More Like the Master, 162-163. Greenville: Ambassador International, 2004.

Chapter 11

1. Parker, Dalene. “The Worst Thing a Teacher Can Do.” In Rest Stops for Teachers, 112-114, by Susan Titus Osborn. Nashville: Broadman and Holman, 2003. 2. Young, Jesus Calling.

ABOUT THE AUTHOR Dalene Vickery Parker is a National Board Certified English teacher with a passion for inspiring teenagers and encouraging educators. She has won several teaching awards. In addition, Dalene has authored numerous magazine articles for publications that include Brio, Focus on the Family, Home Life, Journey, Encounter, Kyria, and has ghostwritten for a well-known pastor and television personality. Dalene is a CLASS certified speaker and is currently completing a Doctor of Education degree at Bob Jones University. She lives in Spartanburg, SC, with her husband, Pat, and teaches at a local high school. The Parkers are blessed with two remarkable children, Daniel and Susanne.